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[opening theme music playing]
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[upbeat music playing]
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[Gumball]
Ladies and gentlemen,
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00:00:31,698 --> 00:00:34,409
good evening and welcome
to this charity roast.
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00:00:34,493 --> 00:00:35,327
[audience applauding]
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Now, before hurling
comedic abuse at Alan,
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stop and think.
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00:00:39,915 --> 00:00:42,626
Search your soul...
and realize there are
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00:00:42,709 --> 00:00:44,169
way meaner things
you could say.
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-[chuckles]
-[Alan chuckles] Oh.
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Alan, you're the worst thing
that happened to air
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00:00:47,839 --> 00:00:49,258
since the invention
of farting.
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-[laughs]
-[audience gasps]
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00:00:51,635 --> 00:00:53,720
Alan,
you're insufferably nice.
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00:00:53,804 --> 00:00:55,305
No joke here. I mean it.
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Completely insufferable.
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-[laughs]
-[chuckles nervously]
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00:00:58,850 --> 00:01:01,478
Alan, you could draw any face
you like in the morning.
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00:01:01,561 --> 00:01:04,231
Why pick the one everyone
wants to punch? [laughs]
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00:01:04,314 --> 00:01:06,733
You'll notice there's no hand
holding Alan's string,
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because kids actually
want to see him get lost.
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He's the only balloon
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that makes children cry
by not bursting at parties.
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If Alan was a spice,
he'd be powdered water.
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00:01:15,200 --> 00:01:16,118
This guy's so dry,
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only a cactus like Carmen
could survive a date with him.
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00:01:18,412 --> 00:01:19,621
The reason no one's perfect
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00:01:19,705 --> 00:01:21,707
is because no one
wants to be Alan!
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This guy's so full of himself,
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he has to tie his butt
into a knot.
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...I always say to Alan
is that he's a star,
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because he is a huge
ball of gas. [laughs]
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-[coughs]
-[microphone feedback]
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Uh, well, uh, thanks
for that, Gumball. [chuckles]
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But now
the hog roast is open,
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so please grab a plate
and help yourselves.
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I'm not-- Wait,
what did he just say?
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This is a charity
hog roast, Gumball,
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for positivatots.
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We protect kids
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from negativity,
cruelty, and hate.
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[sizzling]
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[gasping]
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Why didn't you stop me?
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Well, you are doing
such a great job
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at illustrating
the kind of person
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we don't want to be.
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We're all about positive
reinforcement here,
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right, guys?
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[positivatots cheering] Yay!
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[gasps]
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[tense music playing]
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[squeals]
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People are literally
chipping in to stop kids
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from turning out like me.
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[laughs nervously]
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Dude, you okay?
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00:02:27,773 --> 00:02:29,483
Yeah, just getting
a last giggle in
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before the shame crushes me.
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00:02:31,109 --> 00:02:32,652
Ah, there it is.
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[calm music playing]
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I mean, you don't always
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have to point out
people's flaws.
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-[groans]
-Have you seen the world?
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How can I not?
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And I always thought
people liked me
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for my jokes, you know?
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It's my gift.
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Oh, you're gifted, all right.
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Genius, even.
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But your genius name
would be Albert Neinstein,
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and you'd be famous
for your theory of negativity.
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I don't wanna be a Neinstein.
I want people to like me.
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From now on
I will only say nice things!
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00:03:03,266 --> 00:03:08,647
No more negative words like
"don't, bad, wrong," or "Ohio"!
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00:03:09,147 --> 00:03:10,899
[Tony groaning]
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[inhales]
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[groaning continues]
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-[crashes and thuds]
-[shatters]
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00:03:30,585 --> 00:03:32,921
Okay, we gotta
get you outta here.
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Oh, dropped my orange.
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Oh, dropped it again.
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00:03:36,174 --> 00:03:37,592
Oh, dropped another one.
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00:03:37,676 --> 00:03:39,636
Oh, there it goes again. Oh.
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-[Gumball hissing]
-[beeping]
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-[sloshing]
-Wait, what? [groans]
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00:03:46,643 --> 00:03:48,979
-[hissing continues]
-Okay, let's go somewhere
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you can let it all out.
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[inhales]
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[roaring loudly]
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[panting]
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Are we done?
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00:04:03,785 --> 00:04:05,787
[roaring continues]
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Yes.
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00:04:17,841 --> 00:04:19,676
[thudding and crackling]
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00:04:19,759 --> 00:04:21,636
Why do you think
you find it so hard
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00:04:21,720 --> 00:04:24,097
not to roast everything
and everyone around you?
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Listen to your inner voice.
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00:04:25,974 --> 00:04:26,975
What does it say?
100
00:04:27,058 --> 00:04:29,311
It says real psychoanalysis
can only come
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00:04:29,394 --> 00:04:32,022
from the official
French region of Analyseux,
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otherwise, it's just
sparkling hogwash.
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00:04:34,316 --> 00:04:37,444
Ugh, I mean, can't you just
live and let live?
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Why do you need to interject
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and overthink
the smallest stuff?
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I think my main issue is more
people under-thinking, dude.
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00:04:44,326 --> 00:04:45,452
Why, though?
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00:04:45,535 --> 00:04:47,537
Because you don't make
the world better
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by giving participation medals
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to the very boneheads
that make it unlivable.
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00:04:51,875 --> 00:04:53,293
It's like leaving
the freezer open
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00:04:53,376 --> 00:04:54,836
to fight global warming.
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People need to know
when they're wrong.
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That doesn't mean
I hate them.
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Think of it as a high five,
but, like, to the face.
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00:05:01,927 --> 00:05:03,386
So, it's out of love?
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Yeah, I tough-love them,
I guess.
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00:05:05,889 --> 00:05:09,601
But, Gumball,
look at the world. [gasps]
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♪ It's been a long while
On this rock ♪
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♪ Since anybody
Caught a break ♪
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♪ Anything that flies
Swims or walks ♪
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♪ Knows that life's no
Piece of cake ♪
123
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-[loud explosion]
-[rumbling]
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♪ Oh, what we do
What we do ♪
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♪ Is just trying
To get through ♪
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00:05:29,496 --> 00:05:31,665
♪ The weather, the hunger ♪
127
00:05:31,748 --> 00:05:33,500
♪ The plunder, the new ruler ♪
128
00:05:33,583 --> 00:05:35,377
♪ What we do, what we do ♪
129
00:05:35,460 --> 00:05:37,420
♪ Is just trying
To get through ♪
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00:05:37,504 --> 00:05:39,214
♪ We all try
Our measly best ♪
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♪ To make something
Of this mess ♪
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♪ So what we do, what we do ♪
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00:05:43,718 --> 00:05:46,346
♪ Is just trying
To get through ♪
134
00:05:46,429 --> 00:05:48,181
♪ The struggle
The hubble and bubble ♪
135
00:05:48,265 --> 00:05:49,933
♪ And every sort of trouble ♪
136
00:05:50,016 --> 00:05:51,768
♪ What we do, what we do ♪
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♪ Is just plowing
Through and through ♪
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♪ We don't need
Your disrespect ♪
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♪ To know we're all
Far from perfect ♪
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That was a pretty long
roundabout way
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to just call me a jerk.
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You're welcome.
143
00:06:04,072 --> 00:06:06,324
So, what am I
supposed to do then?
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00:06:06,408 --> 00:06:08,785
Ask the universe.
145
00:06:11,788 --> 00:06:13,623
Ugh. All right.
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-[gagging]
-[tense music playing]
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Dude, what are you doing?
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I'm trying to lay down
my metaphorical sword.
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[gagging continues]
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00:06:27,095 --> 00:06:28,346
Ugh!
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00:06:29,598 --> 00:06:31,933
-[heroic music playing]
-Yeah!
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You served me well,
Sharptongue,
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00:06:34,561 --> 00:06:36,521
but our life
of cutting down fools
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has come to a close.
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Let's go home.
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00:06:44,237 --> 00:06:45,572
[Darwin] Dude, that was
pretty gross.
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00:06:45,655 --> 00:06:47,032
[Gumball] Just consider
yourself lucky
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I didn't lay down
a metaphorical torpedo.
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[groaning]
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00:06:53,038 --> 00:06:55,040
[intriguing music playing]
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[groaning continues]
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00:07:03,214 --> 00:07:04,132
[creaking]
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00:07:05,300 --> 00:07:06,676
[clanging]
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00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:08,219
-[shatters]
-[Alan groans]
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Huh? Is this
what it's like to be Alan?
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I don't feel judgment,
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00:07:12,349 --> 00:07:14,351
just warmth
for the people around me,
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00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:16,394
struggling
in an imperfect world.
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[shatters]
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Gumball! I've been looking
for you everywhere.
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-[panting]
-Why? What's not yet right?
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It's the kids,
the positive reinforcement.
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I think it was too much
of a good thing. [pants]
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It started with them
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00:07:30,450 --> 00:07:31,785
comparing me
to a whoopee cushion
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when I tried to get them
to leave the playground.
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00:07:33,745 --> 00:07:35,413
So, of course, I gave them
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00:07:35,497 --> 00:07:37,374
self-expression stars
as a reward.
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They were being so creative.
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00:07:39,125 --> 00:07:39,959
But before you know it,
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they were missing
from the bus,
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so, obviously,
I tried to bring them
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00:07:43,171 --> 00:07:44,464
non-participation medals
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00:07:44,547 --> 00:07:46,758
because it's important
to encourage self-initiative.
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00:07:46,841 --> 00:07:49,177
But one thing led
to another and... and...
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00:07:49,761 --> 00:07:51,137
[screeches]
187
00:07:51,221 --> 00:07:53,014
[positivatots shouting
indistinctly]
188
00:07:53,723 --> 00:07:54,974
[laughs maniacally]
189
00:07:57,435 --> 00:07:59,729
-[screaming]
-Hey!
190
00:08:01,773 --> 00:08:03,525
Can you please do your thing?
191
00:08:03,608 --> 00:08:05,652
Alan, I've changed my ways.
192
00:08:06,236 --> 00:08:09,948
Besides, aren't these your
positivity-children-tots,
193
00:08:10,031 --> 00:08:12,283
or, like, po... positivatots
or whatever?
194
00:08:12,367 --> 00:08:14,744
Gumball, they've become
a positiva-terror.
195
00:08:14,828 --> 00:08:16,162
Now, please get in there.
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00:08:16,246 --> 00:08:17,539
[laughing and shouting stops]
197
00:08:19,040 --> 00:08:20,375
[inhales]
198
00:08:20,458 --> 00:08:22,085
-Children...
-[calm music playing]
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00:08:22,168 --> 00:08:24,713
...come on. This isn't you.
200
00:08:24,796 --> 00:08:27,549
Take a look inside yourselves,
and really--
201
00:08:27,632 --> 00:08:28,883
-[music stops]
-[footsteps approaching]
202
00:08:31,136 --> 00:08:32,637
They physically insisted
203
00:08:32,721 --> 00:08:35,223
that I look
inside myself instead.
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00:08:36,015 --> 00:08:38,435
What was that?
What is wrong with him?
205
00:08:38,518 --> 00:08:39,352
Dress them down
206
00:08:39,436 --> 00:08:41,062
with that sharp tongue
of yours!
207
00:08:43,773 --> 00:08:45,692
Hey, you...
208
00:08:45,775 --> 00:08:49,821
Hey, you look like
you need a filling...
209
00:08:49,904 --> 00:08:52,240
-Huh?
-...in on how your behavior
210
00:08:52,323 --> 00:08:54,451
is affecting those around you.
211
00:08:56,369 --> 00:08:58,371
-[all shouting indistinctly]
-Oh, boy.
212
00:08:58,455 --> 00:09:00,040
-[rapid thudding]
-[Gumball yelping]
213
00:09:00,123 --> 00:09:02,333
-[indistinct shouting]
-[objects clattering]
214
00:09:02,834 --> 00:09:04,210
[Gumball yelps and groans]
215
00:09:06,546 --> 00:09:08,798
[groans] I can't do it.
216
00:09:08,882 --> 00:09:11,342
I buried my tongue sword.
217
00:09:11,426 --> 00:09:13,428
Yeah, I truly don't know
what that means.
218
00:09:13,511 --> 00:09:15,722
Gumball, it's just
a stupid metaphor.
219
00:09:15,805 --> 00:09:17,140
I know. I...
220
00:09:17,223 --> 00:09:19,434
I really don't want everyone
to hate me, though.
221
00:09:19,517 --> 00:09:21,352
-[solemn music playing]
-Gumball,
222
00:09:21,436 --> 00:09:23,354
it hurts me to admit it,
223
00:09:23,438 --> 00:09:27,400
but people deserve
a clap back sometimes,
224
00:09:27,484 --> 00:09:29,027
and I...
225
00:09:29,986 --> 00:09:31,279
I was wrong.
226
00:09:42,999 --> 00:09:46,086
Good evening, sir.
What shall it be today?
227
00:09:46,169 --> 00:09:48,046
Give me all you got.
228
00:09:48,129 --> 00:09:50,173
[rattling]
229
00:09:50,256 --> 00:09:52,634
[dramatic music playing]
230
00:09:53,843 --> 00:09:55,762
[indistinct shouting
and cheering]
231
00:09:56,971 --> 00:09:58,973
[Gumball] Positivatots!
232
00:09:59,057 --> 00:10:00,850
-[positivatots] Huh?
-[dramatic music continues]
233
00:10:11,444 --> 00:10:12,362
[all cheer]
234
00:10:13,988 --> 00:10:15,573
Let's dance.
235
00:10:15,657 --> 00:10:17,283
-[dance music playing]
-[positivatots yelling]
236
00:10:17,367 --> 00:10:19,118
I'm all for organic produce,
237
00:10:19,202 --> 00:10:21,287
but whoever grew you
picked you last!
238
00:10:21,371 --> 00:10:24,374
I've heard of milking a joke,
but this is just formulaic.
239
00:10:24,457 --> 00:10:27,085
Chlorophyll?
More like chloro-fail.
240
00:10:27,168 --> 00:10:28,461
You're so square
you're doing it
241
00:10:28,545 --> 00:10:30,755
in three dimensions!
242
00:10:30,839 --> 00:10:32,549
Oh, sorry, home slice.
243
00:10:32,632 --> 00:10:34,384
Your friend didn't
make the cut.
244
00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:35,885
You guys look like
AI-generated
245
00:10:35,969 --> 00:10:36,970
cartoon characters,
246
00:10:37,053 --> 00:10:39,222
but without any
of the intelligence!
247
00:10:39,305 --> 00:10:41,558
The midwife really
dropped the ball with you.
248
00:10:41,641 --> 00:10:42,684
She should be fired.
249
00:10:42,767 --> 00:10:45,395
No need to be sour.
You're just not a baller.
250
00:10:46,104 --> 00:10:48,189
-[yelling]
-You get my point.
251
00:10:49,357 --> 00:10:51,776
[breath trembling]
252
00:10:54,237 --> 00:10:56,030
[screaming]
253
00:10:58,908 --> 00:11:01,244
Clearly you aren't
a wisdom tooth.
254
00:11:02,036 --> 00:11:02,871
[grunts]
255
00:11:05,456 --> 00:11:07,000
[engine sputtering]
256
00:11:08,751 --> 00:11:10,211
Thanks again, Gumball.
257
00:11:10,295 --> 00:11:11,462
How can I repay you?
258
00:11:11,546 --> 00:11:12,589
It's okay.
259
00:11:12,672 --> 00:11:14,299
I think we both
learned our lesson,
260
00:11:14,382 --> 00:11:17,719
that a light roasting adds
a little flavor to the world.
261
00:11:17,802 --> 00:11:18,887
So, we're good.
262
00:11:20,763 --> 00:11:22,348
Actually...
263
00:11:22,432 --> 00:11:24,058
-[roaring loudly]
-[Alan screaming]
264
00:11:31,065 --> 00:11:33,067
[closing theme music playing]
18554
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