Original subtitles

♪ Whoa-whoa whoa ♪

Ah. I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it.

I-I-I...

Joey Emerson, I just came over here

to tell you that you're a pig.

- Nobody stands me up. - See--

I don't even wanna ask where you were last night

'cause I know you're just gonna make something up.

I'm hurt you would even think that.

See, there was an emergency, see.

My dad, my dear sweet daddy

he... he fell down the stairs.

Poor man was screaming in pain

as I carried him six blocks to the hospital.

So, I-I guess the excitement, w-w-with the operation and all

I guess... I'm sorry, I must have forgotten about our little date.

'I forgot my ball.'

I'll see you after the bowling tournament.

Bye, son.

That man is your dad?

The man who had to be carried to the hospital?

The man who is on his way to a bowling tournament?

And you made it all possible.

Oh, Joey, I'm so sorry.

♪ Them that's got shall have ♪

♪ Them that's not shall lose ♪

♪ So the Bible says ♪

♪ And it still is news ♪

♪ Mama may have ♪

♪ Papa may have ♪

♪ But God bless the child ♪

♪ That's got his own ♪

♪ That's got his own ♪ Them that's got shall get ♪

♪ Them that's not shall lose ♪

♪ Them that's got shall get ♪

♪ Them that's not shall lose ♪

♪ Whoa-whoa whoa ♪

How would you like it if I threw your stuff out?

Hey, pop, Joey, what's going on here?

No, it seems while I was out this afternoon, Joey took it

upon himself to clean up our apartment.

Pop, I need some more room, I threw out

some stuff you had in there.

- It was old. - Hey, I'm old, am I next?

Pop, it's just a bunch of old train schedules.

I mean, what good are they?

These schedules... tell me where I've been in my life.

Here, look at this one.

"October, 27th, 1948.

"New York to Chicago on a Century Limited."

Now, I was a porter on that train

when President Harry S. Truman was campaigning for his

re-election, he shook my hand and asked me for my opinion.

- No kidding, pop. - Mm-hmm.

The president asked you for you opinion?

- Mm-hmm. - About what?

About how long it would take me to shine his shoes.

This situation reminds me of something we always see at work.

One mans trash is another man's treasure.

Uh-huh.

Roc, I realize that philosophy furnished his house.

But... me and daddy got a real problem here.

I mean, he's crowding me out of our room.

Oh, hey, come on, Joey, you and I

shouldn't be arguing about this.

- Yeah. - This is all Roc's fault.

- My fault? - That's right.

If you had a house with more rooms

we wouldn't all be climbing over each other.

Oh, it's not the number of rooms that's the problem.

It' the number of relatives sponging in them.

Besides, you know I'm saving up for a bigger house someday.

Semi-detached.

Yeah, yeah, we know.

And when you get it, don't forget to

scotch tape a picture of it on my tombstone.

'You know, it just so happens, Roc'

'I might be able to help you out.'

- Yeah, with what, Joey? - Look at this.

I picked this uptown at the court house today.

What were you doing at the courthouse?

- I was taking care of a suit. - 'What suit?'

Nice, double breasted number.

You see, this guy was selling it out the back of his van.

Oh, Roc, you gotta go down there, man.

He... he carries portliest.

- Joey, if I'm not-- - Okay, anyway, anyway, anyway.

See. This is a list of houses that's being auctioned off

because their owners defaulted on their loans.

Yes, so?

This might be a chance for you to get a jump on that

dream house you always bumpin' your gums about.

See, when a bank forecloses on a house.

- They don't want the house. - They don't?

No. They just want the money that's owed to them.

So when they put that house on auction you might get it

for a $30,000 bid even though it's worth a whole lot more.

Well, I don't have anywhere near $30,000.

Roc, there are ways to do this.

Yeah, and I bet you know how.

Of course, I do.

Gosh, you probably wanna get a bank loan.

You know that's not such a bad idea, either.

Wait, you think I can get a bank loan?

I think you and Eleanor together could.

I mean, after all you both got steady jobs.

Well, I don't know, guess I could

talk it over with Eleanor later.

- There you go. - Yeah, you oughta do that, son.

In the mean time, you don't mind if I store this

in your bedroom closet, do you?

Just until we move into our new house.

- Sure, pop. - Hmm.

Man, what a weird cat living here surrounded by old junk.

Hey, come on, he said they were memories from his past.

I was talking about you, Roc.

Now, I like this house better than all the others we've seen.

- Hmm. - This ones gotta roof.

Yeah, buddy, I can make myself real comfortable here.

I really like this place.

Well then, by all means, let's buy it.

Thank you, Roc.

I was being sarcastic, Joey.

Please don't toy with my emotions like that.

Roc, I really love this house.

Yeah, it's real nice.

I know we can't buy any new furniture right away.

But, you know I think we can move our stuff around in here0

and make it look good.

Yeah, if we keep moving fast enough.

Yeah, well, don't you worry, Eleanor.

I'll find us lots of new furniture on my route.

You know, I was thinking art deco.

Well, until the new stuff arrives

I think that our couch will look good over here.

And the TV will look good, right-right here.

- And the piano-- - Whoa, boy!

That's starting to sound like a lotta heavy lifting.

Um, come on, daddy, let's take another look at my bedroom

and work out a color scheme. Uh...

What do you think? A room in shades or shutters?

In your case, son... shades.

Roc, you're not saying you like this house, because you can see

how much I like this house, are you?

Of course, not. I wouldn't lie to you, you're my wife.

Heck, you're more than that.

You're my co-signer.

Don't you forget it.

Eleanor, I think the four of us will do just fine here.

Just the four of us?

I was thinking it might be nice to hear the pitter-patter

of a little feet around the house.

- No, I hate cats. - Oh, Roc.

That's not what I'm talking about.

Now, where exactly was it you put that couch, huh?

Yeah, well, excuse us, we are rearranging furniture.

You don't have to explain, we're newlyweds too.

Oh, we aren't newlyweds, we're just hot.

- But, congratulations to you. - Thank you, thank you.

We're looking to buy our first home.

We've been staying with my parents.

Do you know what it's like living with your family?

Oh, don't get me started, I've got enough of it out there.

Have you been through the house?

Oh, yes and wait till you see it.

Hard wood floors, huge closets and the bathroom--

Sweetheart, take a look at this molding over here, excuse us.

- Eleanor, cool it. - What do you mean?

The way you're talking this house up

every lookie loo in the city's gonna bid on it.

Every what?

Lookie loo.

I heard Joey use it.

Roc, you're being silly.

Baby, I love this place, I want it.

Gee, Roc! You think that could be termite?

- Termites? - I-I can't be sure.

Until we look at the basement.

I hate to go down there, since we saw a rat in the kitchen.

Rat?

Well, it probably started out as a rat.

But by now it's more like a small dog.

And you know, you should really see the upstairs.

Just watch out for the fallen plaster.

Yeah, the whole place needs a new roof.

But the house looks like it's in such great condition.

Oh, he, he, he. Cosmetically it is.

We're talking structurally here.

Come on, baby.

There's a much nicer house down the street.

- Hello. - Hello.

- Some house, huh? - House? You mean this dump?

It's got termites, bad plumbing, the walls need re-enforcement--

Hey lady, take it easy, I'm not shopping.

Excuse me, you mean you're not here looking

to make a bid on this house?

Oh, no, up until last month this was my house.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

I didn't mean those things I said. I love this house.

Trashing it was my husbands idea.

To discourage other bidders.

He sounds like a smart man.

I'll bet he has life insurance.

- Yeah, a little, I guess. - Well, see that he does.

My husband died without any insurance.

That's how I lost this place.

I fell behind on the mortgage payments

and the bank to it over.

Hmm.

Poor Milton would be turning in his grave

if he could see the mess I'm in now.

Milton was your husband?

Oh, no, Forest was my husband

Milton was my father and he told me

I never should have married Forest.

So, how long did you live in this house?

30 years, heh.

I can't tell you what this old place means to me.

Every corner has a... a special memory.

Over here... is where we used to put up our tree

each Christmas.

- You see these marks over here? - Yeah.

Every year on his birthday we would measure

how tall our son had grown.

He was a tall boy, wasn't he?

Oh yes, he had a pituitary problem.

All Forest family did.

Oh, what a waste.

What do you mean?

Well, all that height

and not a speck of talent on the basketball.

Oh, ha, ha, ha.

Sounds like you and Forest

had a very colorful life in this house.

Oh, yes, we did.

I always thought that I'd spend the rest of my life here.

But things don't always work out the way that we want them to.

Yeah, pop, I got some great ideas for this basement.

Wood paneling, mood lighting

nice black leather sofa.

Oh, forget it, forget it, Joey, now way I'm gonna let you

turn this basement into a play pen for bimbos.

Roc, you're saying it like it's a bad thing.

Well, I think this basement will make a great rumpus room.

A-a rumpus room? What are you talking about?

Ah, you can still bring your bimbos down here.

No, I mean what's a rumpus room?

Ah, you know, a recreation room, a nice family room

that you can socialize in, play dominos.

All we need is a few card tables, some chairs.

A hot tub.

There will be no bimbos, dominos or hot tubs in my workshop.

- Workshop? - 'Yeah.'

It's always been one of my dreams. I wanna...

- I wanna make things down here. - Yeah, so do I.

Joey, I mean, I love working with my hands.

Yeah, so do I.

Okay, let's get something straight here, huh?

When you get your semi-detached house

and you can have your rumpus room.

When you get your semi-detached house

and it'll be a cold day in hell

you can have your love den.

But for now since I'm the one footing the bills

I'm the one who says what it's gonna be

and I say it's gonna be a workshop.

Alright.

Well, unless you know Eleanor wants it for laundry wash.

And we were hanging this wallpaper when our son called

to tell us our first grandchild was born, a big baby.

Well, I got so excited that I hung this row upside down

and we just decided to leave it that way...

...to always remind us of the joy that we felt that day.

That's so sweet.

Listen to me rattle on, I...really better be going.

It was just lovely meeting you, Eleanor.

You too, Mrs. Hope.

'Don't let anybody touch a light switch.'

'The wiring is so bad you can light up like an X-Ray.'

- Relax, Roc, nobody's here. - Oh.

Eleanor, I love this house.

- Oh, so do I. - Me too.

- I love this house too, Roc. - Well, then that settles it.

This is the house I'm gonna bid on.

Way to go, son.

You do and I'll never speak to you again

as long as I live.

What's her problem? She's getting a laundry room.

Come on, Eleanor, can't we even talk about it?

Roc, I told you how I feel.

If we buy that house we'd be taking advantage

of poor Mrs. Hope's misfortune.

- So what's your point? - Joey, you're heartless.

Oh, come on, sis, if you don't buy it somebody else will.

Good thinking, Joey. Yeah, that's the truth, Eleanor.

Roc, you can't stand there and tell me that you'd live

in that house knowing that that poor old woman was forced out.

Well, you know, um, I-I feel sorta sorry for the old lady.

But, you know, I-I can live there.

Well, maybe, you know, maybe thinking...

Eleanor, I understand how you feel.

I think it's a damn shame the way the elderly are treated

in this country. You get older, you get discarded, no one cares.

So, daddy, you agree with me.

Hell no, I want my rumpus room.

Now, pa has a point, Eleanor, he's work hard all of his life.

You and I work hard, Joey...

Well, anyway, we deserve that house.

But I don't want any part of it.

Eleanor, will you stop and think for a minute.

This house could be the best thing that ever happened to us.

We may never have another chance to get something this nice

at a price we can afford.

Now, you know how long we've dreamed of a house like that.

This isn't a dream anymore, Eleanor, this could happen.

This is real.

And sweetheart, I know how sensitive and caring you are.

That's one of the things I really love about you.

But, you gotta cut me some slack on this one.

Roc, you feel that strongly about this?

Yeah, I do, Eleanor, yeah.

Then, Roc, I think you should bid on that house.

Okay, alright, we're going there tomorrow.

And I hope you'd be very happy living there

with your father and your brother

'cause I'm not living in it.

Roc, you gotta tell her about that laundry room.

Eleanor, if your still so against it, why'd you come?

Because I had to see with my own eyes that you would actually do

something that I'm so dead set against.

- Hello, Eleanor. - Mrs. Hope?

I'm surprised to see you here.

Well, I couldn't let this chapter of my life

close without my being here.

Roc, this is Mrs. Hope. The lady I told you about.

Oh, hi, Mrs. Hope. Great house you had.

Thank you.

Well, I'm-m really sorry... how things worked out for you.

But you, know life goes on.

I know, I just never expected to leave here

while there were still breath left in my body.

Uh, well, um... any time you wanna stop by and visit.

You know to breath, you're welcome.

And if it means anything.

I want you to know we'll take special care of it.

- Thank you. - You know if we get it.

Thank you, and I hope you do get this house.

- You do? - Well, goodness yes.

You seem like such a nice family

and I much rather you get it than him.

- Well, who is he? - He's a developer.

He only want's this house so he can tear it down

and build a fluff and foe.

Oh, ho, ho.

Mrs. Hope, you mean you really be happy

if we bought this house?

Well, of course, my dear.

You and your husband remind me so much of Forest and me.

Except, you're so much shorter.

Well, you hear that, honey. Now, what do you say?

Yo, let's kick it, baby.

Everyone will take a seat, we'll get started.

Hey, Roc, maybe, you oughta let me do the bidding for you.

Why?

'Cause there's more to this than calling out dollars, Roc.

- You gotta have a poker face. - Yeah, well, I can do that.

No, you can't. That's your problem.

Everything you think goes right across

that silly face of yours.

See that's exactly what I'm talking about.

See, I can look at you right now and tell you wanna hurt me bad.

Listen, son, what you have to do is start low

and raise the bid a little at a time.

You never know when a hundred dollars more

is gonna force somebody to drop out.

And Roc, remember, we can't go any higher than 35,000.

Right, right, right, poker face, start low, little bid, 35,000.

- Is there an opening bid? - 35,000!

No!

I have an opening bid of 35,000.

Roc, baby, what were you thinking?

I don't know, I got caught up in the excitement of the moment.

That was... that's pretty dumb, huh?

- Thirty six thousand. - Thirty seven thousand!

We don't have 37,000.

God, I was crazy, look, it's okay, it's okay.

I'm sure there is somebody else that'll bid again.

- Thirty eight thousand. - Thirty nine thousand.

Stop!

- We'll sell the car. - We ain't got a car.

Forty thousand.

- I-I-I'm sorry, honey. - I have a bid of 40,000.

Going once. Going twice.

- Forty one thousand! - Eleanor!

- Joey can get a job. - Hey!

- Forty two thousand. - Forty three thousand.

- So can daddy. - Hey!

Let's just end this. Fifty thousand dollars.

I...have a bid of $50,000.

- Uh-- - Don't you dare.

If there are no more bids.

Fifty five thousand.

Mrs. Hope, you have 55,000?

No, but why should everyone else have all the fun?

- Sixty thousand. - Sixty five.

You don't have the money, they could sue you.

What are they gonna get?

All I have got left are extra large children's clothes.

- Seventy thousand. - Seventy five. This is fun.

- Eighty thousand. - I think I've had enough fun.

Eighty thousand once.

And twice.

And sold.

Well, I'm sorry about the house, Mrs. Hope.

Guess, this means they'll tear it down.

Well, good luck to you, Mrs. Hope.

Thanks, at least I showed that sleazebag

I don't sell my memories cheap.

Eighty five thousand.

♪ Ooh ooh ♪

♪ Ooh ooh ooo-oooh ♪