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1
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♪♪
2
00:00:05,373 --> 00:00:07,139
Woman on phone: You are a warrior.
3
00:00:07,141 --> 00:00:09,041
I am a warrior.
4
00:00:09,043 --> 00:00:13,312
- You are a goddess.
- I am a goddess.
5
00:00:13,314 --> 00:00:14,913
(elevator dings)
6
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A goddess who's really nervous, and really
should've worn more antiperspirant.
7
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Hi! I'm Sofia Rodriguez. Uh, I'm
here to meet with Logan Rawlings
8
00:00:28,062 --> 00:00:29,962
for the assistant position.
I'm a little early.
9
00:00:29,964 --> 00:00:32,231
Yeah, well, I'm a week late.
10
00:00:34,001 --> 00:00:35,901
You're scheduled to meet her
after the staff meeting,
11
00:00:35,903 --> 00:00:38,737
so, much like my diet...
you're gonna have to wait.
12
00:00:38,739 --> 00:00:42,508
That's... no problem at all.
I am an excellent waiter.
13
00:00:42,510 --> 00:00:45,377
In fact, if I don't get this
job, I might have to be one.
14
00:00:49,750 --> 00:00:52,251
- Is Logan here yet?
- No.
15
00:00:52,253 --> 00:00:54,386
She's not here yet, right?
16
00:00:54,388 --> 00:00:55,788
Cool.
17
00:00:57,158 --> 00:00:58,757
She here yet?
18
00:00:58,759 --> 00:01:02,261
- No.
- Oh, thank god. Ooh.
19
00:01:07,168 --> 00:01:08,200
Hi.
20
00:01:08,202 --> 00:01:10,536
- Who are you?
- Oh, hi. Um, I'm Sofia,
21
00:01:10,538 --> 00:01:13,539
- I'm here to meet with--
- Logan Rawlings for the assistant position.
22
00:01:13,541 --> 00:01:16,108
Yeah, the blazer gave it away.
It says, "I'm serious, but...
23
00:01:16,110 --> 00:01:17,676
I'll still get drinks with Leo."
24
00:01:19,046 --> 00:01:20,679
- Who's Leo?
- That's me!
25
00:01:20,681 --> 00:01:22,848
- Oh.
- Leo Woods. Nice to meet you.
26
00:01:22,850 --> 00:01:25,617
News editor. Logan poached
me from The New York Times
27
00:01:25,619 --> 00:01:27,619
because of my fearless exposés.
28
00:01:27,621 --> 00:01:28,687
- She's here!
- Oh god!
29
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(elevator dings)
30
00:01:33,394 --> 00:01:36,095
CJ? There's a BMW parked in my spot.
31
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Have it crushed into a cube.
32
00:01:38,632 --> 00:01:40,432
Hello, how was everyone's weekend?
33
00:01:40,434 --> 00:01:43,469
- (employees respond)
- Oh, who am I kidding? I don't care.
34
00:01:43,471 --> 00:01:47,873
What I do care about
is the graffiti artist, Rooster.
35
00:01:47,875 --> 00:01:50,059
So... what do we know?
36
00:01:50,060 --> 00:01:52,244
Well, just that he's the most talked-about
underground artist right now,
37
00:01:52,246 --> 00:01:53,812
but nobody knows his true identity.
38
00:01:53,814 --> 00:01:56,582
Last night he tagged his first mural
in San Francisco in Dolores Park.
39
00:01:56,584 --> 00:01:57,816
Yeah, I already know that.
40
00:01:57,818 --> 00:02:00,052
The problem is,
every news media outlet
41
00:02:00,054 --> 00:02:03,055
is trying to get an exclusive with
him, but we're gonna get there first.
42
00:02:03,057 --> 00:02:06,792
Look, there's a reason why we're the
fastest-growing media site in the country.
43
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Because I hired the best of the best.
44
00:02:10,731 --> 00:02:12,231
That's you!
45
00:02:12,233 --> 00:02:16,168
Now, go get me Rooster! Go, go, go!
46
00:02:16,170 --> 00:02:17,970
Finally, my coffee.
47
00:02:17,972 --> 00:02:19,071
Ooh.
48
00:02:19,073 --> 00:02:21,240
Ugh! Why is there sugar in here?
49
00:02:21,242 --> 00:02:23,308
Uhh, actually
because that's my coffee,
50
00:02:23,310 --> 00:02:24,776
see it says "Sofia." Right there.
51
00:02:24,778 --> 00:02:27,813
Um... I'm actually here
to interview for your assistant.
52
00:02:27,815 --> 00:02:30,849
My dream is to be a journalist, and
I've been following your career
53
00:02:30,851 --> 00:02:33,152
since you left San Francisco
Monthly to start Clik'd,
54
00:02:33,154 --> 00:02:35,154
your media empire
and my favorite website.
55
00:02:35,156 --> 00:02:37,289
One question. Would you kill for me?
56
00:02:37,291 --> 00:02:41,527
- What?
- If BuzzFeed had an exclusive that I wanted,
57
00:02:41,529 --> 00:02:43,462
would you kill for me?
58
00:02:43,464 --> 00:02:47,366
No? Because it would
be traced back to us.
59
00:02:47,368 --> 00:02:51,570
I'd do one of the three "B's"
-- bribe, blackmail or blow.
60
00:02:53,841 --> 00:02:55,274
Oh, their cover.
61
00:02:55,276 --> 00:02:58,310
- Interesting, Maria.
- It's Sofia.
62
00:02:58,312 --> 00:02:59,511
Whatever, we're done.
63
00:03:05,186 --> 00:03:07,986
Gabi, what are you doing up here?
64
00:03:07,988 --> 00:03:10,222
Oh, hey! I was in the
lobby waiting for you,
65
00:03:10,224 --> 00:03:13,258
but somebody said there was a
free cereal bar up here, so...
66
00:03:16,463 --> 00:03:17,863
Hey, so, how'd it go?
67
00:03:17,865 --> 00:03:19,998
Well, I definitely
made an impression.
68
00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:21,867
I just don't know if it was
a good one or a bad one.
69
00:03:21,869 --> 00:03:24,736
Oh, great. Hey, who'd you
do an impression of?
70
00:03:26,874 --> 00:03:30,576
Gabi, I want this job so ba-aad.
71
00:03:30,578 --> 00:03:32,411
I mean, this could be
my stepping stone
72
00:03:32,413 --> 00:03:35,080
to me having my own media empire
73
00:03:35,082 --> 00:03:37,849
and one day somebody answering
my phones.
74
00:03:37,851 --> 00:03:39,918
(phone rings)
75
00:03:39,920 --> 00:03:44,022
That's my phone. Aw, it's Clik'd.
It's Clik'd, it's Clik'd!
76
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Answer it!
77
00:03:46,260 --> 00:03:50,529
Hello? It's not Maria,
it's Sof-- mm-hm.
78
00:03:50,531 --> 00:03:55,434
Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
79
00:03:55,436 --> 00:03:58,237
Okay, thank you.
80
00:03:58,239 --> 00:04:00,939
Aww. Hey, it's okay.
81
00:04:00,941 --> 00:04:02,407
You know, I didn't
want to say anything before,
82
00:04:02,409 --> 00:04:05,010
but... like no one has ever
heard of this website,
83
00:04:05,012 --> 00:04:07,512
- and Logan is like a total bi--
- I got the job!
84
00:04:07,514 --> 00:04:09,281
(gasp) Oh my god!
85
00:04:09,283 --> 00:04:10,249
You got the coolest job ever!
86
00:04:10,251 --> 00:04:13,452
(screaming)
87
00:04:14,755 --> 00:04:17,589
♪ Ooh baby, ooh baby ♪
88
00:04:18,525 --> 00:04:20,359
Hello, co-workers!
89
00:04:20,361 --> 00:04:22,828
Just got my badge, I am official!
90
00:04:23,897 --> 00:04:26,632
Oh! Hey! Congratulations!
91
00:04:26,634 --> 00:04:30,135
I wasn't, like, waiting for you
right here or anything.
92
00:04:30,137 --> 00:04:33,438
Thank you. I was so nervous,
when I went downstairs
93
00:04:33,440 --> 00:04:34,640
to get coffee, I grabbed
the wrong one!
94
00:04:34,642 --> 00:04:35,741
Who the hell's Zoey?
95
00:04:35,743 --> 00:04:38,543
(laughs) It's okay. Nobody likes her.
96
00:04:38,545 --> 00:04:41,546
Uh, do you want me to show you
where your desk is?
97
00:04:41,548 --> 00:04:43,615
Oh. Isn't it... right there?
98
00:04:43,617 --> 00:04:45,050
It is. Look at you.
99
00:04:45,052 --> 00:04:46,618
Looks like my job is done.
100
00:04:47,955 --> 00:04:50,055
And when yours is,
I was thinking that maybe
101
00:04:50,057 --> 00:04:51,556
we could grab some drinks.
102
00:04:51,558 --> 00:04:54,426
Oh... actually...
see, my roommate Gabi
103
00:04:54,428 --> 00:04:56,128
started dating a guy she works with,
104
00:04:56,130 --> 00:04:58,563
and it's a total disaster,
so I, actually,
105
00:04:58,565 --> 00:05:00,499
have a policy that I don't do that.
106
00:05:00,501 --> 00:05:01,300
Yeah.
107
00:05:01,302 --> 00:05:03,402
Even if there's a hot, hot guy
108
00:05:03,404 --> 00:05:05,070
and I am totally single.
109
00:05:05,072 --> 00:05:08,307
- Hey, Kendrick. Entertainment news.
- Hi.
110
00:05:08,309 --> 00:05:10,342
All right, everybody.
Just got off the phone
111
00:05:10,344 --> 00:05:11,777
with Big Sean, who gave me a lead
112
00:05:11,779 --> 00:05:12,911
as to who Rooster might be,
113
00:05:12,913 --> 00:05:14,680
so it looks like... we have a winner.
114
00:05:14,682 --> 00:05:17,349
Yeah, we do.
115
00:05:17,351 --> 00:05:21,520
Because my contact at Sotheby's...
116
00:05:21,522 --> 00:05:24,856
got me information that I'm sure
will be better than yours.
117
00:05:24,858 --> 00:05:27,926
So, looks like I will be,
in fact, the winner.
118
00:05:27,928 --> 00:05:30,962
I have a Pulitzer, so...
119
00:05:30,964 --> 00:05:32,998
It's his only friend besides his mom.
120
00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:34,866
(laughs)
121
00:05:34,868 --> 00:05:36,535
Assistant, follow me.
122
00:05:37,871 --> 00:05:38,937
Good morning!
123
00:05:38,939 --> 00:05:41,306
We don't assume my morning's good.
124
00:05:41,308 --> 00:05:42,541
Sorry.
125
00:05:42,543 --> 00:05:44,376
And don't apologize.
It's a weak move.
126
00:05:44,378 --> 00:05:46,278
Makes me look weak by association.
127
00:05:46,280 --> 00:05:47,479
(snaps finger) Show some confidence.
128
00:05:47,481 --> 00:05:48,847
Noted. Oh.
129
00:05:48,849 --> 00:05:52,150
Um, I just wanna say
it is a real honor
130
00:05:52,152 --> 00:05:53,352
to work for such a strong woman.
131
00:05:53,354 --> 00:05:54,553
Yeah, yeah, yeah, lucky you.
132
00:05:54,555 --> 00:05:55,787
Here's the deal.
133
00:05:55,789 --> 00:05:57,556
Answer my phone on the second ring,
134
00:05:57,558 --> 00:05:59,124
the first seems too desperate.
135
00:05:59,126 --> 00:06:00,192
Each night email me
136
00:06:00,194 --> 00:06:01,393
my next day's schedule,
137
00:06:01,395 --> 00:06:02,527
oh, and on Fridays
138
00:06:02,529 --> 00:06:04,496
I have a court-mandated
anger management class,
139
00:06:04,498 --> 00:06:06,732
so... you need to be there by 6:00.
140
00:06:08,202 --> 00:06:09,534
Done.
141
00:06:09,536 --> 00:06:11,503
Hey, Logan, these came for you.
142
00:06:11,505 --> 00:06:12,738
I don't get it.
143
00:06:12,740 --> 00:06:14,406
You get flowers after a date,
144
00:06:14,408 --> 00:06:15,974
and I wake up stuck
to a beanbag chair
145
00:06:15,976 --> 00:06:17,109
in a frat house.
146
00:06:18,379 --> 00:06:21,046
(sighs) They're gorgeous!
147
00:06:21,048 --> 00:06:23,915
Read me the card.
148
00:06:23,917 --> 00:06:26,585
"Congratulations
on being honored tonight
149
00:06:26,587 --> 00:06:28,086
"at the Digital Media Awards.
150
00:06:28,088 --> 00:06:30,355
"You are light, you are love,
151
00:06:30,357 --> 00:06:31,656
you are Logan."
152
00:06:33,193 --> 00:06:35,560
That's so profound.
153
00:06:35,562 --> 00:06:36,661
Wait.
154
00:06:36,663 --> 00:06:39,531
Nobody signed it. Who sent these?
155
00:06:39,533 --> 00:06:41,233
Me!
156
00:06:41,235 --> 00:06:44,736
I sent them to myself.
It just makes me feel better
157
00:06:44,738 --> 00:06:46,772
about not having a date
to the awards dinner.
158
00:06:46,774 --> 00:06:49,775
You know, for some reason,
women are so intimidated by me.
159
00:06:49,777 --> 00:06:52,444
My great job,
my Michelle Obama arms...
160
00:06:52,446 --> 00:06:55,614
and god knows how many
journalism awards.
161
00:06:55,616 --> 00:06:57,616
92.
162
00:06:57,618 --> 00:07:01,019
So, um... do you want me
to go with you or...?
163
00:07:01,021 --> 00:07:04,389
(laughs) Oh no... I date girls with
pictures on the side of buses,
164
00:07:04,391 --> 00:07:06,458
not ones who ride in them.
165
00:07:07,961 --> 00:07:10,228
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god!
166
00:07:10,230 --> 00:07:11,430
What?
167
00:07:11,432 --> 00:07:12,864
Okay, so, in prepping for this job,
168
00:07:12,866 --> 00:07:15,133
I made a list of all the
hot lesbians I know.
169
00:07:15,135 --> 00:07:16,535
How would you like
to go to the awards show
170
00:07:16,537 --> 00:07:18,804
with... neurosurgeon,
marathon runner,
171
00:07:18,806 --> 00:07:21,440
and semi-pro golfer Whitney Harper?
172
00:07:21,442 --> 00:07:23,141
She sounds ugly.
173
00:07:25,078 --> 00:07:27,279
Yet looks amazing.
174
00:07:27,281 --> 00:07:29,548
I'm gonna call her right now
'cause... you know,
175
00:07:29,550 --> 00:07:30,916
I got your back, I got your front,
176
00:07:30,918 --> 00:07:32,217
- and I got--
- Will you just call her?
177
00:07:32,219 --> 00:07:33,452
Yeah.
178
00:07:37,591 --> 00:07:38,790
Hey, guys.
179
00:07:38,792 --> 00:07:40,759
We're havin' a late night
book club meeting.
180
00:07:40,761 --> 00:07:42,294
What are you reading?
181
00:07:42,296 --> 00:07:44,963
The labels on the wine.
182
00:07:44,965 --> 00:07:46,264
Hey, how was your first day?
183
00:07:46,266 --> 00:07:47,899
Let's just say, I did something
184
00:07:47,901 --> 00:07:49,668
that will guarantee I work at Clik'd
185
00:07:49,670 --> 00:07:51,236
for many, many years.
186
00:07:51,238 --> 00:07:52,471
Oh, you slept with Logan.
187
00:07:52,473 --> 00:07:54,506
Close.
188
00:07:54,508 --> 00:07:56,842
I set her up with power
lesbian Whitney Harper.
189
00:07:56,844 --> 00:07:58,810
Don't you mean "Whip Me Harder"?
190
00:07:58,812 --> 00:08:01,146
(laughs) What are you talking about?
191
00:08:01,148 --> 00:08:03,849
(angrily) What are you talking about?
192
00:08:03,851 --> 00:08:06,418
She's known for being kinky.
193
00:08:06,420 --> 00:08:08,587
She wines and dines women,
then takes them home,
194
00:08:08,589 --> 00:08:10,589
and goes 50 Shades of Gay on 'em.
195
00:08:10,591 --> 00:08:11,590
What?
196
00:08:11,592 --> 00:08:14,259
Girl, relax. It's a first date.
197
00:08:14,261 --> 00:08:15,527
Yeah, they're not gonna hook up.
198
00:08:15,529 --> 00:08:17,329
Yeah, not everyone's like Gabi.
199
00:08:18,699 --> 00:08:20,532
(phone rings)
200
00:08:22,469 --> 00:08:23,635
Hi, Logan.
201
00:08:23,637 --> 00:08:25,704
I'm in a cage.
202
00:08:29,710 --> 00:08:31,676
Oh my god, Logan!
203
00:08:31,678 --> 00:08:33,612
I had no idea.
204
00:08:33,614 --> 00:08:35,647
I have never been so humiliated!
205
00:08:35,649 --> 00:08:37,148
I don't know who I hate more,
206
00:08:37,150 --> 00:08:39,718
you, or that crazy bitch
you set me up with.
207
00:08:40,687 --> 00:08:42,053
Did you bring the bolt cutters?
208
00:08:42,055 --> 00:08:45,524
Yes. Just out of curiosity,
what led you getting in--
209
00:08:45,526 --> 00:08:46,858
Oh, just open the frickin' cage!
210
00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:49,961
Right. Right. Aha! Ha!
211
00:08:51,465 --> 00:08:53,064
All right, let's get you out here--
212
00:08:53,066 --> 00:08:55,567
Get away! Get away!
213
00:08:57,971 --> 00:08:59,738
Thank you.
214
00:08:59,740 --> 00:09:01,006
You're fired!
215
00:09:01,008 --> 00:09:04,509
What, what? No. Look, I
realize you're upset,
216
00:09:04,511 --> 00:09:05,810
but you have to give me
another chance.
217
00:09:05,812 --> 00:09:06,878
No, I don't.
218
00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:11,249
I'll do anything. Um...
I'll find you Rooster!
219
00:09:11,251 --> 00:09:13,685
You? You can get me Rooster.
220
00:09:13,687 --> 00:09:17,355
Am I not Sofia Maria Consuela
Rafaella Rodriguez?
221
00:09:17,357 --> 00:09:18,924
I have no idea.
222
00:09:18,926 --> 00:09:21,993
But if you can somehow
get me an exclusive by Friday,
223
00:09:21,995 --> 00:09:23,194
you can keep your job.
224
00:09:23,196 --> 00:09:25,697
Thank you. Thank you. I swear to you,
225
00:09:25,699 --> 00:09:28,099
on my abuelita's grave,
I will get you that interview.
226
00:09:28,101 --> 00:09:29,601
And my award.
227
00:09:29,603 --> 00:09:32,470
It's in the house.
Next to the nipple clamps.
228
00:09:37,678 --> 00:09:40,712
Hi. Can I please get a triple
vanilla latte with almond milk,
229
00:09:40,714 --> 00:09:44,749
extra hot. No sugar. Not even a dot.
230
00:09:44,751 --> 00:09:48,787
Ooh... I know that order.
(gasp) And that look of fear.
231
00:09:48,789 --> 00:09:51,556
You must be Logan Rawlings'
new assistant.
232
00:09:51,558 --> 00:09:53,058
At least 'til Friday.
233
00:09:53,060 --> 00:09:55,927
Oh my god. You're the one
who got her locked in the cage!
234
00:09:55,929 --> 00:09:57,762
(laughs)
235
00:09:57,764 --> 00:09:59,130
How do you know that?
236
00:09:59,132 --> 00:10:03,568
I know everything that happens
up there at Clik'd. (laughs)
237
00:10:03,570 --> 00:10:04,936
Yeah, well... I have two days
238
00:10:04,938 --> 00:10:07,939
to find some street artist
named Rooster or I'm fired.
239
00:10:07,941 --> 00:10:12,410
Uch, I hate Rooster!
My ex, Carlos, is a tagger,
240
00:10:12,412 --> 00:10:15,113
and on my birthday,
he left me at a mall food court,
241
00:10:15,115 --> 00:10:16,982
because Rooster texted him!
242
00:10:17,985 --> 00:10:19,918
Oh my god, you know Rooster?
243
00:10:19,920 --> 00:10:21,286
I mean, that is horrible.
244
00:10:21,288 --> 00:10:22,420
Right?
245
00:10:22,422 --> 00:10:23,622
How about this?
246
00:10:23,624 --> 00:10:25,757
I'll email Carlos, pretending
you and I are together,
247
00:10:25,759 --> 00:10:27,158
to make him jealous.
248
00:10:27,160 --> 00:10:31,730
Ooh... I don't know
if you can tell, but I'm gay.
249
00:10:31,732 --> 00:10:34,065
I don't know if you can tell,
but I am desperate.
250
00:10:34,067 --> 00:10:36,134
Please, can I please
have Carlos' email?
251
00:10:36,136 --> 00:10:40,472
Well... all right, as long as you
tell him I look really thin.
252
00:10:42,776 --> 00:10:44,776
Logan? I am so sorry
to interrupt you,
253
00:10:44,778 --> 00:10:46,745
but I just had a major breakthrough.
254
00:10:46,747 --> 00:10:49,414
Me, too. I need a lock on my door.
255
00:10:49,416 --> 00:10:52,484
I have found you
Rooster's email address.
256
00:10:52,486 --> 00:10:54,119
What?
257
00:10:54,121 --> 00:10:55,587
Right here.
258
00:10:55,589 --> 00:10:58,323
Oh my god! Oh my god, this is huge!
259
00:10:58,325 --> 00:10:59,958
Uh... uh...
260
00:10:59,960 --> 00:11:02,827
god, I wish I knew your name
right now!
261
00:11:02,829 --> 00:11:04,796
So when is he coming in, what did he say?
Tell me everything.
262
00:11:04,798 --> 00:11:07,265
Well, I emailed him,
but he didn't write me back,
263
00:11:07,267 --> 00:11:10,769
- so...
- Wait, what? You promised me Rooster.
264
00:11:10,771 --> 00:11:14,806
Not some unverified email address.
What are you thinking?
265
00:11:14,808 --> 00:11:18,343
Well, since, uh... nobody else was
able to find anything on him,
266
00:11:18,345 --> 00:11:20,145
this email is... something.
267
00:11:20,147 --> 00:11:22,447
"Something"?
268
00:11:23,784 --> 00:11:26,651
Is that how I got all these awards?
269
00:11:26,653 --> 00:11:30,021
For... "something"?
270
00:11:30,023 --> 00:11:32,357
Is that why I mortgaged my house
271
00:11:32,359 --> 00:11:34,859
and sacrificed
all my personal relationships
272
00:11:34,861 --> 00:11:36,444
to build this company?
273
00:11:36,445 --> 00:11:38,028
So I could settle for "something"?
274
00:11:38,031 --> 00:11:41,700
Don't pat yourself on the back
for a job not done.
275
00:11:41,702 --> 00:11:45,437
I need an interview!
Not a piece of trash.
276
00:11:50,177 --> 00:11:52,277
And showing me your underwear
isn't gonna help.
277
00:11:54,848 --> 00:11:56,981
But... nice try.
278
00:12:02,422 --> 00:12:05,924
Oh my god... did you all hear that?
279
00:12:05,926 --> 00:12:07,726
And saw it.
280
00:12:07,728 --> 00:12:13,231
The-- th-the walls are glass, so...
281
00:12:14,534 --> 00:12:15,767
Hey, I tell you what.
282
00:12:15,769 --> 00:12:17,769
Let me have Rooster's
email address, I'll handle this.
283
00:12:17,771 --> 00:12:19,170
Handle what? What are you gonna do?
284
00:12:19,172 --> 00:12:21,206
What he always does--
something unethical.
285
00:12:21,208 --> 00:12:23,675
And then he'll get the interview and
take all the credit. You know what?
286
00:12:23,677 --> 00:12:24,876
I'll handle it.
287
00:12:24,878 --> 00:12:25,910
Nnh...
288
00:12:25,912 --> 00:12:26,845
What are you gonna do?
289
00:12:26,847 --> 00:12:28,167
Uhh, something ethical, Kendrick.
290
00:12:29,049 --> 00:12:31,349
You guys, we all
want this interview, okay?
291
00:12:31,351 --> 00:12:36,187
And... so...
why don't we work together?
292
00:12:36,189 --> 00:12:37,956
Together, like a date?
293
00:12:39,860 --> 00:12:41,926
Why'd you have
to make it weird, dude?
294
00:12:46,066 --> 00:12:47,766
Look, I still feel
the same way, guys,
295
00:12:47,768 --> 00:12:50,401
all right? Reading somebody else's
email is a breach of privacy,
296
00:12:50,403 --> 00:12:51,603
and I can't do it.
297
00:12:51,605 --> 00:12:53,872
Okay, can we read it to you?
298
00:12:53,874 --> 00:12:56,040
I guess I could be
a bit of a bad boy.
299
00:12:57,811 --> 00:13:01,780
Kendrick, um... have to say, I'm, really
impressed that you got your hacker friend
300
00:13:01,782 --> 00:13:03,815
- to do this.
- Yeah, (clears throat) he has a girlfriend, so...
301
00:13:03,817 --> 00:13:06,451
Great. Okay,
so let's get back to work.
302
00:13:06,453 --> 00:13:11,089
Uch, this Rooster guy is so boring,
I just read an entire email
303
00:13:11,091 --> 00:13:14,159
about how he found the perfect bank.
How sad is his life?
304
00:13:15,595 --> 00:13:17,395
Oh my god. Wait.
305
00:13:17,397 --> 00:13:18,963
Did he, did he name the bank?
306
00:13:18,965 --> 00:13:20,632
Yeah, Mutual Bank. Why?
307
00:13:20,634 --> 00:13:26,070
Well... I'm just spitballin' with
my Ivy League brain over here.
308
00:13:26,072 --> 00:13:28,573
But nobody says they found the perfect
bank unless they're robbing it...
309
00:13:28,575 --> 00:13:31,176
Or tagging it. He's gonna tag
Mutual Bank.
310
00:13:31,178 --> 00:13:33,745
Which one? There are...
three in San Francisco.
311
00:13:33,747 --> 00:13:35,246
That's great, we can each
stake one out.
312
00:13:35,248 --> 00:13:38,550
Cool, I love stakeouts. Really
gets my adrenalin going, you know?
313
00:13:43,657 --> 00:13:45,456
(phone rings)
314
00:13:45,458 --> 00:13:47,692
Hello? Leo? Did you find him?
315
00:13:47,694 --> 00:13:49,661
Oh, no. No, no, no,
I'm still on my way to the bank,
316
00:13:49,663 --> 00:13:51,496
I just wanted to call and say hi.
317
00:13:53,033 --> 00:13:54,966
Oh god, no!
318
00:13:54,968 --> 00:13:56,668
Rooster was already here,
his mural's up.
319
00:13:56,670 --> 00:13:57,869
I friggin' missed him.
320
00:13:57,871 --> 00:13:59,337
I'll call you back.
321
00:13:59,339 --> 00:14:02,273
Oh, okay. No, she hung up.
322
00:14:07,647 --> 00:14:10,481
Excuse me. Hi.
323
00:14:10,483 --> 00:14:13,518
Uh, did you happen to see
who painted that mural,
324
00:14:13,520 --> 00:14:16,154
and maybe get a photo of him
or contact information?
325
00:14:16,156 --> 00:14:17,188
(laughs)
326
00:14:17,190 --> 00:14:22,060
Are you on drugs?
'Cause I got pepper spray.
327
00:14:22,062 --> 00:14:25,396
Wait! How 'bout this? How 'bout
$10 if you saw something.
328
00:14:25,398 --> 00:14:27,899
I ain't see anything.
329
00:14:27,901 --> 00:14:30,869
Wait! Why is there paint
on your hands?
330
00:14:30,871 --> 00:14:34,739
Girl, I'm a homeless person, there's
a lotta stuff on me I can't explain.
331
00:14:36,142 --> 00:14:39,944
Oh my god. You're Rooster.
332
00:14:40,914 --> 00:14:42,513
And you're a woman.
333
00:14:42,515 --> 00:14:45,917
(laughs) I found you!
334
00:14:45,919 --> 00:14:48,086
Wait, wait, wait, wait! Wait.
335
00:14:48,088 --> 00:14:50,889
I work for Clik'd, and we really
wanna do an exclusive on you.
336
00:14:50,891 --> 00:14:52,924
Hell, no, gimme back my paint!
337
00:14:52,926 --> 00:14:55,593
No! I'm not gonna let you leave
until you give me an interview.
338
00:14:55,595 --> 00:14:57,495
- Get outta my way, little girl!
- No!
339
00:14:57,497 --> 00:15:01,099
It's gonna make you famous! It's
gonna put you in the spotlight!
340
00:15:01,101 --> 00:15:03,552
(police siren)
341
00:15:03,553 --> 00:15:06,004
Police officer: Put your hands
up where I can see 'em!
342
00:15:06,006 --> 00:15:08,439
See? It's already workin'.
343
00:15:15,115 --> 00:15:19,083
Great news.
So, uh, my boss is on her way.
344
00:15:19,085 --> 00:15:21,953
So all you have to do is give her
an exclusive, I get to keep my job,
345
00:15:21,955 --> 00:15:23,021
and we're both outta here.
346
00:15:23,023 --> 00:15:24,689
No.
347
00:15:24,691 --> 00:15:26,457
No, what?
348
00:15:28,295 --> 00:15:30,061
No interview.
349
00:15:30,063 --> 00:15:32,797
I'm sorry. Maybe I didn't
make myself clear.
350
00:15:32,799 --> 00:15:36,434
If you don't do this interview,
I will lose my job.
351
00:15:36,436 --> 00:15:38,269
Oh, well, you didn't say that.
352
00:15:38,271 --> 00:15:39,470
So you're gonna do it?
353
00:15:39,472 --> 00:15:40,972
No, but now I feel bad.
354
00:15:40,974 --> 00:15:43,308
(sighs) Look, Rooster...
355
00:15:43,310 --> 00:15:47,145
I have spent years of my life
trying to find my passion.
356
00:15:47,147 --> 00:15:49,213
And I finally found it.
357
00:15:50,216 --> 00:15:53,051
I wanna be a writer!
358
00:15:54,120 --> 00:15:58,656
I wanted to be a writer.
Now I'm a hooker.
359
00:16:02,629 --> 00:16:05,096
But... if you don't do
this interview,
360
00:16:05,098 --> 00:16:07,899
all of my dreams will be crushed.
361
00:16:07,901 --> 00:16:10,969
I know a guy who likes
things crushed.
362
00:16:12,672 --> 00:16:16,007
I've spent years trying to
change the world with my art.
363
00:16:16,009 --> 00:16:18,676
And in one damn night,
you crushed my dreams.
364
00:16:18,678 --> 00:16:23,748
You're right.
I made this all about me.
365
00:16:23,750 --> 00:16:26,084
I am so sorry, Rooster.
366
00:16:26,086 --> 00:16:28,486
I'm so sorry, hooker.
367
00:16:28,488 --> 00:16:31,289
- You're sorry?
- Logan.
368
00:16:31,291 --> 00:16:33,191
What did I tell you about
"I'm sorry"?
369
00:16:33,193 --> 00:16:35,493
Why are they letting you in here?
Did you get arrested, too?
370
00:16:35,495 --> 00:16:38,429
No. I know Kozakowski.
I used to date his wife.
371
00:16:38,431 --> 00:16:41,265
Hi. Logan Rawlings.
372
00:16:41,267 --> 00:16:43,434
I know who you are,
and I'm not talking.
373
00:16:43,436 --> 00:16:44,869
I wanna stay anonymous.
374
00:16:44,871 --> 00:16:47,105
Yeah, well,
you can kiss that goodbye,
375
00:16:47,107 --> 00:16:49,140
because in 24 hours,
your mug shot is gonna
376
00:16:49,142 --> 00:16:52,143
be on the front cover of every
news site and gossip blog
377
00:16:52,145 --> 00:16:53,678
from here to London.
378
00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:56,481
So you can either let those
other sites distort your story,
379
00:16:56,483 --> 00:16:59,350
or you can express
your truth... to me,
380
00:16:59,352 --> 00:17:00,985
in your own words.
381
00:17:00,987 --> 00:17:03,187
How do I know you're not
gonna distort my words?
382
00:17:03,189 --> 00:17:06,224
I'll give you final approval
on the article.
383
00:17:06,226 --> 00:17:07,191
Do it!
384
00:17:09,162 --> 00:17:10,728
Fine. I'm in.
385
00:17:10,730 --> 00:17:13,064
Kozakowski! Open up.
386
00:17:14,300 --> 00:17:15,933
I'm bailing these two out.
387
00:17:18,838 --> 00:17:22,573
Well, wa-wait, what about me?
I'll do stuff.
388
00:17:24,044 --> 00:17:26,511
And her.
389
00:17:26,513 --> 00:17:30,982
Logan. You were so amazing. I-I just
can't believe it all worked out,
390
00:17:30,984 --> 00:17:33,418
I got you your interview,
and I get to keep my job.
391
00:17:33,420 --> 00:17:36,854
Actually, I got the interview.
392
00:17:36,856 --> 00:17:38,823
You came up short. Again.
393
00:17:40,026 --> 00:17:41,292
You're fired.
394
00:17:52,372 --> 00:17:55,106
Hey, CJ. Guess you heard I'm fired.
395
00:17:55,108 --> 00:17:57,075
I'm just here to pack up my stuff.
396
00:17:57,077 --> 00:18:01,245
Mmm. I'm so glad it's you and not me.
397
00:18:04,784 --> 00:18:06,217
Hey.
398
00:18:06,219 --> 00:18:10,221
Listen, um... I'm really sorry for
the way everything turned out.
399
00:18:10,223 --> 00:18:14,692
But you are... very talented, okay, and
I'm sure you're gonna land on your feet.
400
00:18:14,694 --> 00:18:15,993
Thanks, Leo.
401
00:18:17,230 --> 00:18:22,100
But... you know, now that
we're not working together...
402
00:18:22,102 --> 00:18:25,303
You don't have to listen
to him hit on you anymore.
403
00:18:28,741 --> 00:18:31,109
Seriously, for what it's worth, I
think it's really lame she fired you.
404
00:18:31,111 --> 00:18:34,045
You busted your ass for her.
Oh, by the way,
405
00:18:34,047 --> 00:18:36,647
the story's generated three million
views, broke all our records.
406
00:18:36,649 --> 00:18:39,484
Yeah, well, I have a record,
too... for fastest fired.
407
00:18:41,454 --> 00:18:45,656
Woman on phone: You are a warrior.
408
00:18:47,494 --> 00:18:51,028
You are a goddess.
409
00:18:55,835 --> 00:18:59,804
You know what?
I was about to walk outta here,
410
00:18:59,806 --> 00:19:03,574
and then I thought... "Why?
Why am I leaving?
411
00:19:03,576 --> 00:19:07,345
I did an incredible job."
412
00:19:07,347 --> 00:19:10,248
I worked my ass off for you. I
got you in a room with Rooster,
413
00:19:10,250 --> 00:19:13,451
which led you to getting the most
viewed article in Clik'd history.
414
00:19:13,453 --> 00:19:17,288
If that's not closing the deal,
then I don't know what is.
415
00:19:17,290 --> 00:19:21,192
You know what? And I'm gonna
leave you with one last thought.
416
00:19:21,194 --> 00:19:24,595
This whole issue you have
with "I'm sorry"?
417
00:19:24,597 --> 00:19:27,198
I'm not sorry. But you're gonna be.
418
00:19:27,200 --> 00:19:30,301
- Because you are losing the best damn--
- You can have your job back.
419
00:19:30,303 --> 00:19:33,437
Oh god, thank you so much!
420
00:19:38,311 --> 00:19:42,880
That's... the kind of confidence
I've been looking for.
421
00:19:42,882 --> 00:19:45,716
Except for that last part.
422
00:19:45,718 --> 00:19:47,952
Now get up and get back
to your desk, Sofia.
423
00:19:56,963 --> 00:19:59,564
She knows my name.
424
00:20:01,167 --> 00:20:03,167
She knows my name!
425
00:20:03,169 --> 00:20:08,406
♪ I'm feeling independent ♪
426
00:20:08,408 --> 00:20:11,576
♪ I never felt so free ♪
427
00:20:11,578 --> 00:20:13,244
♪ Whoa-oh-oh-oh! ♪
428
00:20:15,148 --> 00:20:17,481
I'm home!
429
00:20:17,483 --> 00:20:19,750
Yay! Finally!
430
00:20:19,752 --> 00:20:23,588
I can't believe I made it
a week. And I'm still alive!
431
00:20:23,590 --> 00:20:27,858
All right, well... cheers
to being alive.
432
00:20:27,860 --> 00:20:29,193
Oh...
433
00:20:29,195 --> 00:20:30,695
Why are you wearing a name tag
that says Logan?
434
00:20:30,697 --> 00:20:34,165
Oh my god... 'cause I had to go
to anger management class as her.
435
00:20:34,167 --> 00:20:36,434
Turns out, um...
she slapped a meter maid,
436
00:20:36,436 --> 00:20:39,637
and her trainer... and Cher.
437
00:20:40,840 --> 00:20:42,573
Wow...
438
00:20:42,575 --> 00:20:46,677
Well... slap on some lipstick,
because we are goin' out.
439
00:20:46,679 --> 00:20:49,213
This whole week has been
Logan, Logan, Logan,
440
00:20:49,215 --> 00:20:52,350
but now it's the weekend,
and it's gonna be us, us, us.
441
00:20:52,352 --> 00:20:55,019
We're gonna get down,
we're gonna get--
442
00:20:56,556 --> 00:20:58,289
Sofia.
443
00:21:14,474 --> 00:21:16,440
- (phone rings)
- (grunts)
444
00:21:20,480 --> 00:21:22,246
Hello? Logan.
445
00:21:22,248 --> 00:21:24,815
Of course I'm up.
446
00:21:26,886 --> 00:21:29,287
You saw James Franco
at the Fairmont Hotel
447
00:21:29,289 --> 00:21:31,222
and you want me to find out
what room number he's in?
448
00:21:31,224 --> 00:21:32,290
I'm on it!
449
00:21:32,292 --> 00:21:36,627
Oh! Good! So we are going out.
33610
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