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Zulu
This programme contains very strong language
and scenes of a sexual nature.
and scenes of a sexual nature.
(WINDOW OPENS)
(THUD & GRUNTING)
(MUFFLED VOICES INSIDE)
(FRONT DOOR OPENS)
(FRONT DOOR OPENS)
FOOTMAN: Kapellmeister!
(URGENT MUSIC)
Kapellmeister! Sir!
Kapellmeister, please. Oh, God!
Kapellmeister, please. Oh, God!
(URGENT MUSIC CONTINUES)
(KEYS JANGLING)
(SOMBRE, TENSE MUSIC)
(DOOR BANGS)
(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)
Oh, no.
I didn't send for you.
I didn't send for you.
Your footman found this on your person.
It was meant to be read posthumously.
And as the snow broke your fall,
and you didn't cut your throat deeply enough to bleed to death,
and you didn't cut your throat deeply enough to bleed to death,
I respected your wishes, and I haven't opened it.
Read it.
(SIGHS) I am an old woman, Antonio,
pulled from my bed and made to walk through the cold.
But I'm here now.
But I'm here now.
So, why don't you just tell me
whatever it was you wanted to tell me.
Face to face.
Face to face.
(APPLAUSE)
(TENSE MUSIC)
(TENSE MUSIC)
What is it?
It's a confession.
# MOZART: "Piano Concerto No.20 In D Minor" #
(SIGHS)
(PIANO PLAYING)
It sounded lovely up there, dear.
It sounded lovely up there, dear.
Well, thank you.
I'm composing something new.
Oh, a commission? No, no.
A speculative work. Thank you, Bruno.
A speculative work. Thank you, Bruno.
Actually...
..I'm going to show some to the Emperor today.
I thought it might be fun to have him play a little
and then surprise him
and then surprise him
and tell him he's the first person to perform my new opera.
How could he turn it down?
(CLUNKY PIANO PLAYING)
(HORSE WHINNIES) GROOM: Court Composer.
Uh, F- F Sharp, Your Majesty.
(EMPEROR PLAYS CLUMSILY) Yes.
(PLAYS WRONG NOTE) (SIGHS)
(PLAYS WRONG NOTE) (SIGHS)
See, the problem with that note is it's too difficult to arrive at
from the note that precedes it. Who wrote this?
I did, Majesty, it's a... It's a new piece.
I did, Majesty, it's a... It's a new piece.
Did you not consider that
the F Sharp was almost impossible to ascend to from here?
It seemed at the time as if it were the correct direction to take.
It seemed at the time as if it were the correct direction to take.
Yes, well, perhaps a reconsideration is in order.
Perhaps, Your Majesty, yes.
(EMPEROR PLAYS CLUMSILY)
(SIGHS) Right, that's enough for today, I think.
Just take a look at the F Sharp, will you?
Of course, your Majesty. I... (EMPEROR SIGHS)
Of course, your Majesty. I... (EMPEROR SIGHS)
You know, I have plans, Antonio.
Reforms.
Economic, cultural, social, religious.
Economic, cultural, social, religious.
Reforms, the likes of which I do not believe have been attempted before.
The thing with change, though, is that people aren't very keen on it.
The thing with change, though, is that people aren't very keen on it.
(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY) Even if it's in their best interests, so...
..I shall need every trick at my disposal.
..I shall need every trick at my disposal.
Do you know what opera is? Yes.
Well, what do you think it is, sir?
Well, what do you think it is, sir?
Power.
Kings and queens, friends and foes,
Kings and queens, friends and foes,
they will all come here.
They will see our palaces, they will see our armies,
and they will see our operas.
Grander and finer than anything
that London, Prague, or St Petersburg has to offer.
that London, Prague, or St Petersburg has to offer.
I cannot overstate its importance to the Empire.
Of course, Your Majesty, and it's an honour to serve the Crown.
Of course, Your Majesty, and it's an honour to serve the Crown.
Good. So, I would like you to put on a remake.
A remake? Mm.
Your, uh... your opera, Tarare. The French one.
Your, uh... your opera, Tarare. The French one.
I'd like a version for us.
But, uh... not in French, though. Do it in Italian.
Yes, uh...
I did rather have my sights set on newer compositions.
I did rather have my sights set on newer compositions.
Well, save them.
A return to past successes is what's needed in delicate times.
A return to past successes is what's needed in delicate times.
You're a godly man, hmm?
You believe that He speaks through your music?
I believe He does, sir, yes.
I believe He does, sir, yes.
Well, I need you to be my voice too, Salieri.
You have room for us both?
Of course, sir.
(WOMAN SINGS OPERA)
(WOMAN SINGS OPERA)
(MUSIC STOPS)
(MUSIC STOPS)
(TUTS) You seem tired today.
I stayed up, reading.
Well, consider not doing that anymore.
Well, consider not doing that anymore.
I have a new commission from the Emperor.
It's an old opera of mine, originally in French,
to be remounted in Italian and staged here,
to be remounted in Italian and staged here,
and I would very much like you to take a role in it.
(GASPS) Oh, Court Composer, I would be honoured.
(GASPS) Oh, Court Composer, I would be honoured.
What opera is it? Tarare.
Tarare?
Tarare?
It was very popular. I'm not sure I know it.
Well, anyway...
Well, anyway...
We're doing it again.
I thought you were writing something... new.
I thought you were writing something... new.
Well... put on hold.
Now, you go home and try to get some rest.
Well, I will tonight, but Friday is the Baroness' party.
Well, I will tonight, but Friday is the Baroness' party.
Ugh, I'd forgotten all about that.
Did you hear she has a secret performer?
Who? Well, it's a secret, isn't it?
But I've heard it might be Mozart.
The travelling maestro,
wrote his first aria in the womb, and all of that?
Are you not intrigued?
Are you not intrigued?
At least to meet him.
I've met my fair share of prodigies in my time.
Can't say I remember many of their names now, though.
Oh, yes, this could be him. (GIRLS GIGGLING)
He's not gonna be ill-mannered, is he?
He's not gonna be ill-mannered, is he?
What do you mean? He's not gonna be raucous?
JOSEPHA: Do you think he'll have a lot of things?
Where are we gonna put them all? He's not putting them in my room.
He's not putting them in your room. Do you think he'll be handsome?
He's not putting them in your room. Do you think he'll be handsome?
CECILIA: Will you all shush? (GIRLS GIGGLING)
(ALL GASP) ALOYSIA: Oh, hello.
CECILIA: Herr Mozart, welcome. Welcome to our... huh?
CECILIA: Herr Mozart, welcome. Welcome to our... huh?
(RETCHING)
Firstly, I apologise... Secondly, good day.
Firstly, I apologise... Secondly, good day.
CECILIA: So, it's two gulden a month for the room,
and only the room. One meal a day is included.
and only the room. One meal a day is included.
And I'll do a monthly wash, but any extra's extra.
MOZART: Understood. Why did you throw up?
JOSEPHA: Sophie, don't be rude. It's alright. I don't mind, Sophie.
JOSEPHA: Sophie, don't be rude. It's alright. I don't mind, Sophie.
You see, I had quite a bit of wine last night,
and then a little more this morning.
I think it was that, combined with the motion of the carriage, really.
I think it was that, combined with the motion of the carriage, really.
Some letters have already arrived for you.
Have you opened them? Oh, from my father.
Let's have a look. (GIRLS GIGGLING)Shh...
Let's have a look. (GIRLS GIGGLING)Shh...
"Dear Wolfgang, I'm writing to express my displeasure
"at you finding room and board in a delinquent house
"of ill-reputed sluts."
I think he's just a bit upset that I've left Salzburg.
I think he's just a bit upset that I've left Salzburg.
I did explain to him that you're not delinquents. Or sluts, obviously.
The girls' bedrooms are down there. They all have locks on.
You're up this way.
You're up this way.
CONSTANZE: Why did you leave Salzburg?
Oh, my employer. I don't like to speak ill of the man,
but I once met a stable boy who'd been kicked in the head
by a donkey, and I think he had more cognitive aptitude
by a donkey, and I think he had more cognitive aptitude
than the Archbishop of Salzburg.
What a lovely house.
Have you been here a long time?
We moved here recently.
We moved here recently.
My husband passed away,
and then my beautiful Aloysia
got a role at the Imperial Opera, so here we are.
That's marvellous news!
That's marvellous news!
Not about your husband, obviously.
But the Imperial Opera, that's marvellous.
I hope to have my, uh, own work performed there one day.
ALOYSIA: Oh! Do you have a commission?
No, just as in I assume it won't take too long, now that I'm here.
Is this me? Mm.
(FLOORBOARDS CREAK) (BAG THUDS)
(BAG THUDS)
(PLAYS HAUNTING MELODY)
(MOZART STOPS PLAYING)
(CHURCH BELLS IN DISTANCE)
(DOVES COOING)
(GIRLS GIGGLING)
(GIRLS GIGGLING)
Vienna.
(HAUNTING MUSIC)
LEOPOLD: 'Wolfgang, I write to you again,
imploring you to see sense.
'Vienna was not discussed.
'It is reckless in the extreme... (SIGHS)
'Salzburg was the right position for you.
'Apologise to the Archbishop...
'It is not your talent which causes me worry but your manner...
'The politics of Vienna have destroyed shrewder men than you.
'The politics of Vienna have destroyed shrewder men than you.
'Return to Salzburg. Let me guide your career.
'Don't ruin what we have spent so long trying to build.'
(ECHOING) JOSEPHA: Herr Mozart?
(ECHOING) JOSEPHA: Herr Mozart?
Wolfgang? Sorry?
I was asking about the tours you went on when you were younger.
You travelled a lot, didn't you?
You travelled a lot, didn't you?
Yes, no, everywhere, um... England, France, Italy, Vatican.
Exhausting, really.
And your mother and father, they accompanied you?
And your mother and father, they accompanied you?
Yes. Well, until mother died, of course.
Oh? What happened?
When my mother died?
Um, well, we were in Paris, and she was unwell.
We meant to return together, but, uh...
..I returned alone.
(CUTLERY CLINKING)
Have you been to the opera house yet?
Yes, of course. We went last year
when we were visiting the city.
when we were visiting the city.
The girls' father wasn't very well,
but we still managed to see Armida. Do you remember?Ah.
Salieri!Yes. Salieri. I thought it was quite wonderful.
Mmm! Oh, yes.
Mmm! Oh, yes.
(SCOFFS)
ALOYSIA: Oh, you didn't like it? Mm... it was fine.
(CHUCKLES) It was fine!
Constanze thinks herself quite the expert,
Constanze thinks herself quite the expert,
which is funny as she is the least capable vocalist in the family.
Stanze just has a smaller spectrum of ability, that's all.
She wanted to be a star soprano when she grew up.
She wanted to be a star soprano when she grew up.
I'm four notes short, and my range doesn't reach, so...
(ALOYSIA SINGS A SCALE)
These notes... (SINGS HIGH NOTES)
..right at the top, well, Stanze can't hit them.
..right at the top, well, Stanze can't hit them.
God, she used to try and try and fall about in floods of tears.
I wonder if you'd hit that note if I kicked you in the cunt.
CECILIA: Stanze! CONSTANZE: What?! She started it!
CECILIA: Stanze! CONSTANZE: What?! She started it!
(ALL SHOUTING AT ONCE) We have a guest!
She started it! (SHOUTING CONTINUES)
(GIRLS SQUEALING)
(GIRLS SQUEALING)
(ITALIAN OPERA PLAYS IN MOZART'S HEAD)
(MUSIC DROWNS OUT SHOUTING)
(MUSIC DROWNS OUT SHOUTING)
(GENTLE CHAMBER MUSIC PLAYS)
(GENTLE CHAMBER MUSIC PLAYS)
(LAUGHTER AND CHATTER)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Hang on a minute. Two seconds. What?
(INDISTINCT WHISPERING)
(CHAMBER MUSIC CONTINUES)
(WOMAN GIGGLING)
(MOZART LAUGHS) Ooh!
We're not supposed to be in here. Treat room!
Don't touch them. Actually, in my experience,
the things you're not supposed to touch
the things you're not supposed to touch
are the very things that you should touch first.
And... taste?
(MOANING AND SIGHING)
(DISH CLATTERS)
(LOUD MOANING)
(LOUD MOANING)
Oh, that's nice, just a quick...
Ah! ..fuck!
Ah! ..fuck!
Oh!
(BOTH LAUGH)
Oh, a direct hit! Shit, I have a performance to give.
Oh, a direct hit! Shit, I have a performance to give.
Katerina Cavalieri.
My name, by the way, I want you to remember it.
How could I not?
Toodle-loo!
(SIGHS)
(CLOCK CHIMING)
Dear God! (DOOR OPENS & CLOSES)
(VIRTUOSO PIANO PLAYING)
SALIERI: 'It was, on the surface, a simple piece,
'but the more you listened,
the more the layers presented themselves.
'The melody and the harmony alternating seamlessly
'between right and left hands.
'between right and left hands.
'Hands which glanced over the Baroness' fortepiano
'Hands which glanced over the Baroness' fortepiano
'as if guided by something greater than himself.
'This... repulsive creature played so exquisitely.'
'This... repulsive creature played so exquisitely.'
(WOMAN EXCLAIM & GASP)
(WOMAN EXCLAIM & GASP)
(APPLAUSE CONTINUES)
What do you think? Fun, no?
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart.
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart.
Antonio Salieri.
Oh, the court composer?
Yes. This is incredibly fortuitous.
The whole reason why I came to Vienna
The whole reason why I came to Vienna
was to write for the Imperial Opera.
(SCOFFS)
Well, there's a process to all of- Meringue?
Well, there's a process to all of- Meringue?
I wouldn't, they're a bit tart.
You must at least be able to get me one meeting with the Emperor?
He's a very busy man.
What could be more important than this?
What could be more important than this?
Than meeting you?
Well, I believe he's currently drawing up plans
to ensure our nation's claim on the kingdom of Bavaria.
to ensure our nation's claim on the kingdom of Bavaria.
I suppose that might be taking up some of his time.
Ple-e-ease? Just one meeting.
I'd be forever in your debt, obviously.
Well, there is an opportunity coming up.
It's a duel at the palace against Clementi.
The Emperor will be judging the winner.Yes!
The Emperor will be judging the winner.Yes!
But it's in less than a week. There's no time to prepare.
That's loads of time to prepare.
Mozart, to perform badly would do you more harm
than not performing at all. I don't.
than not performing at all. I don't.
You don't what? Perform badly.
Then I shall make arrangements.
Then I shall make arrangements.
Yes! Thank you so much. Thank you, Herr Salieri.
Of course. A pleasure to meet you.
You've just made an excellent evening even better.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(BELL RINGS) SALIERI: Bruno!
Yes, sir? Ah.
Bruno, I'll forgo dinner tonight.
I mean to compose. Excellent, sir.
I mean to compose. Excellent, sir.
Actually, leave me a small cut of beef and some vegetables
on a tray outside the door. Yes, sir.
Oh, and potatoes are in season, aren't they?
They are, sir. I'll have some of those, too.
They are, sir. I'll have some of those, too.
And a glass of wine. There's a Brunello
that will pair excellently. But it's young, so open it now.
It will need time to breathe. Of course, sir.
It will need time to breathe. Of course, sir.
And no disturbances of any kind.
I believe inspiration will not be in short supply.
And say good night to my wife.
I don't think I'll see her this evening.
Right, sir.
(SIGHS)
(SNIFFS)
(PIANO PLAYING)
(KNOCK AT THE DOOR)
Wolfgang. Constanze.
Is everything all right? It's three o'clock in the morning.
Is everything all right? It's three o'clock in the morning.
Is it?! Yes, it is.
And most people are asleep.
In the quiet.
Ah...
Hmm.
Did you just write this?
Did you just write this?
Can I? Please.
It's quite good. Thank you.
Quite good?
Quite good?
(RESUMES PLAYING)
Is it true, what your sisters said about you the other night?
My range? Mm-hmm.
My range? Mm-hmm.
Yes. I used to dream about it, being a singer.
A coloratura soprano.
A coloratura soprano.
I wanted to be a star, I suppose.
I agreed with you about Armida, by the way.
All those boring trails.
Only a fool would like something like that.
I hope you're not calling my sister a fool.
Oh, I wouldn't dream of it.
Oh, I wouldn't dream of it.
I felt really sorry, hearing about your childhood.
Having to travel around like that. I was a very happy child.
Were you?
I don't know.
I don't know.
Were you? No.
Well, I...
It wasn't happy or sad. It was... just...
It wasn't happy or sad. It was... just...
..um, unremarkable.
Unremarkable? Mm-hmm.
Unremarkable? Mm-hmm.
They're only four notes, Constanze.
But I can't reach them.
OK, well... I'm gonna go back to bed now.
Yes, I'll stop playing.
No, don't.
(CHURCH BELL RINGING)
(CHURCH BELL CONTINUES)
(CHURCH BELL CONTINUES)
(LIVELY CHATTER)
(ORGAN PLAYING)
(FLUTE MUSIC PLAYS IN MOZART'S HEAD)
(HORNS JOIN IN)
(STRINGS JOIN IN)
(FULL ORCHESTRA PLAYING)
What?! (MUSIC STOPS)
(MOZART COUGHING)
(MOZART GRUNTS)
(TUMBLES DOWNSTAIRS)
(GLASS BREAKING)
(MOZART GROANING)
(MOZART GROANING)
Oh, good evening.
Did you just fall down the stairs? (GROANS) Nope.
Did you just fall down the stairs? (GROANS) Nope.
(GLASS SHATTERS) Why do you ask?
What time's the duel?
I think it's in about an hour. Right...
Should you be completely smashed for that?
I'm not completely smashed for that.
I just had a couple of sharpeners with lunch. Honestly...
(POURS WINE) Fall down one flight of stairs,
(POURS WINE) Fall down one flight of stairs,
suddenly everyone's accusing you of being completely smashed.
Excuse me!Tonight's too important for you to mess it up!
Sit down. Um...Sit down!
I'm making you a coffee. Coffee? Yes, good idea.
Coffee with a little splash of cognac if you don't mind.
Juggle. This is excellent, truly.
I don't actually know how to juggle. What's excellent?
I don't actually know how to juggle. What's excellent?
Your adding self-sabotage to your other character flaws.
I don't have character flaws.
You have almost nothing but character flaws.
You have almost nothing but character flaws.
Vienna isn't Paris. It isn't London, it isn't...
..Prague. Anywhere else that it isn't?
Wolfgang!
I want you to succeed here.
I want you to succeed here.
Because if you don't, then you can't pay rent.
I will have to sell my things, prostitute my sisters,
and I really love my things.
and I really love my things.
Tonight isn't a parlour game.
It's an audition.
You need these people.
You need these people.
(CHAMBER MUSIC PLAYING)
(GENTEEL CHATTER)
Wolfgang! Oooooh-hoo-hoo!
Wolfgang! Oooooh-hoo-hoo!
Ooh, very fancy, very fancy. Wow!
Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh.
Have you ever met the Emperor before?
No, Wolfgang, no. I've not met the Emperor before.
No, Wolfgang, no. I've not met the Emperor before.
Most people don't.
I wish I'd worn a different dress.
Why? I think you look very comely.
What do you mean by "comely"? Nothing, I just think you look nice.
What do you mean by "comely"? Nothing, I just think you look nice.
I thought you'd like me saying that. You're not helping, Wolfgang.
FOOTMAN: Herr Mozart!
(GIGGLES) Hello!
(GIGGLES) Hello!
(HUSHED WHISPERING)
Mozart! Come!
Your Majesty. Oh! Don't need to worry about that.
Sorry. Yes.I've heard many stories about your talents,
I can't tell you how keen I am to hear them for myself.
Yes.
And this is?
Your Constanze, Majesty.
I mean Constanze, Your Majesty.
I mean Constanze, Your Majesty.
Very good. Well, shall we begin?
(CHEERING)
Right, then. Clementi.
Ooh!
(CLEMENTI PLAYS A CHEERFUL MELODY)
Very good!
Thank you. Actually, may I have a go at that one first?
Thank you. Actually, may I have a go at that one first?
I quite like that one.
By all means. Do you need the music?
MOZART: No, thank you.
(MOZART PLAYS SAME PIECE BUT FASTER)
(MOZART PLAYS SAME PIECE BUT FASTER)
(PLAYS PRESTO)
(PLAYS PRESTO)
Oh! Very good! Very jolly!
(GUESTS EXCLAIMING) Bravo!
(PLAYS A SALIERI COMPOSTITION)
Ah!
Oh, yuck. Who wrote this?
Can I change it? Feel free.
(PLAYS AT A FASTER TEMPO)
Oh, bravo! That's a wonderful tune!
Oh, bravo! That's a wonderful tune!
(LAUGHING) Oh, very good, Mozart.
The F sharp is difficult, isn't it? Ha!
The F sharp is difficult, isn't it? Ha!
(EMPEROR LAUGHS)
Clementi, your response! (CLEMENTI PLAYS JAUNTILY)
Mozart! (MOZART PLAYS DELICATE TRILLS)
Clementi!
(PLAYS A LIVELY TUNE)
(MOZART PLAYS DOUBLE TEMPO)
(MOZART PLAYS DOUBLE TEMPO)
(EMPEROR LAUGHS) Ha!
Come on, Clementi.
Come on, Clementi.
(CLEMENTI PLAYS FASTER)
(AUDIENCE CHEERING) EMPEROR: Ah! Bravo!
A duel like no other.
A duel like no other.
I've never seen anything like it.
Bravo, indeed. Well done, young man.
MOZART: Thank you. (GUESTS EXCLAIMING)
Ladies and gentlemen, a round of applause for Mr Mozart!
Ladies and gentlemen, a round of applause for Mr Mozart!
(CHUCKLES)
What an extraordinary young man.
(CHEERING CONTINUES) Extraordinary.
Absolutely shitting outrageous.
Absolutely shitting outrageous.
SALIERI: Mozart! Mozart! (MOZART SIGHS)
Mozart! Oh, well, that was memorable.
I've never been fucked in a palace before.
I've never been fucked in a palace before.
Excuse me? A tie, after that?!
Would it help if I'd played upside down? I can do that, you know.
God willing, I won't die without witnessing it.
You owe me 50 ducats. That prize should've been mine in its entirety.
You owe me 50 ducats. That prize should've been mine in its entirety.
Wolfgang! He doesn't mean it, sir. He just gets passionate.
The prize wasn't the money, Mozart. It was the Emperor's favour.
The prize wasn't the money, Mozart. It was the Emperor's favour.
And believe you me, you didn't share in that.
He wants to commission an opera from you.
What? (CHUCKLES) Oh, my God.
There were some in the court who thought you might be
There were some in the court who thought you might be
a little too green, but I... I convinced them
you should be given a go.
I don't know what to say.
Well, let us all revel in your temporary silence.
Well, let us all revel in your temporary silence.
Be here Monday afternoon,
1pm sharp. We'll discuss plans.
Thank you so much, Court Composer. Oh, of course, of course.
Thank you so much, Court Composer. Oh, of course, of course.
Thank you. Oh, Wolfgang, a commission!
(LAUGHTER)
(DOOR OPENS)
Of course.
(DOOR SLAMS, MOZART SINGS)
CONSTANZE: (LOUDLY) Shhhhhh!
(WHISPERS) Shh!
To the Emperor! To the Emperor.
To you. To us...
Is this what you do?
Is this what you do?
What?
Kiss any girl who's nice to you?
Would you prefer for me to not kiss you?
Would you prefer for me to not kiss you?
I think it would be improper.
Mmm... That's not what I asked, though.
Oh, I know that's not what you asked, though.
Oh, I know that's not what you asked, though.
If you don't tell me not to kiss you,
then I'm going to kiss you.
I'm not gonna tell you not to kiss me.
I'm not gonna tell you not to kiss me.
CECILIA: Oh, my goodness, I cannot listen to any more!
Mother! (SIGHS)
Constanze. Hello.Wolfgang.
Have you been listening the whole time?
Have you been listening the whole time?
One rule I have, Wolfgang:
I will not allow wickedness under this roof.
I will not have my girls' reputations damaged.
If you break this rule, I will throw you out of this house myself
If you break this rule, I will throw you out of this house myself
and chop up your instruments for firewood.
Do you understand? Yes, Frau Weber. Yes.
So... it is late
and it would do us all well to go to our separate rooms.
Yes, Mother. Absolutely, yes.
Good night, Wolfgang.
Another letter for you.
From your father.
You know, you really should write back to him. Or I will.
(HAUNTING MUSIC)
EMPEROR: You should have seen the look on Clementi's face,
EMPEROR: You should have seen the look on Clementi's face,
it was like he'd seen a ghost! MAN: Yes!
Sweat pouring off him. Ah, here he is! The very boy.
MOZART: Good afternoon, Your Majesty.
Ah, Mozart! Do come in.
So, Herr Mozart, congratulations on your commission.
We're all very intrigued to see what you can do.
Now, I'd like to start by talking about possible themes...
Now, I'd like to start by talking about possible themes...
Oh, I already have an idea.
Oh, really?
Yes. Very excited about it, actually.
But first of all, just to say, this will be an opera in German.
But first of all, just to say, this will be an opera in German.
German?!
Yes. Not Italian?
I just thought it would be nice
if the audience could understand what was being sung for once.
if the audience could understand what was being sung for once.
I haven't always found that to improve the experience, but alright.
(MEN CHUCKLING)
What's your idea? Ah, yes.
What's your idea? Ah, yes.
I've written the first act already.
But in terms of the story, uh, well, here's the thing.
It's quite daring,
both in its composition and in its setting.
both in its composition and in its setting.
ROSENBERG: Setting? Yes, it takes place in a harem.
A fucking what?!
Oh, pardon, Your Majesty. Scuse.
Oh, pardon, Your Majesty. Scuse.
It's set where?!
MOZART: A harem, a whorehouse, a seraglio.
And you consider this appropriate? Yes.
I mean, it's funny, it's different.
I mean, it's funny, it's different.
I can assure you, there won't be any inappropriateness,
and, uh...
..of course, it will contain many fine...
..of course, it will contain many fine...
..German virtues.
And what are those, exactly? Being Italian, I'm not sure.
(MEN CHUCKLING) Yes, come on, Mozart.
(MEN CHUCKLING) Yes, come on, Mozart.
Name us a proper German virtue.
Uh...
Well, love, sire, I suppose.
Well, love, sire, I suppose.
What? This feels like a risk.
VON HOULT: I'll say.
Well...
..we already have Antonio redoing his Tarare.
I think we can probably afford to be a bit...
..exciting with this one.
..exciting with this one.
Give it a... a short run. Low costs.
There doesn't seem to be too much risk there.
Thank you, Your Majesty. Thank you!
Thank YOU, Mozart. Oh, thank you so much.
Thank YOU, Mozart. Oh, thank you so much.
(MOZART SKIPS AWAY) Thank you!
Thank you!
SALIERI: Dear Lord, please speak through me.
Please use me as you have used me before.
Let me be your vessel.
Let me be your voice.
Speak.
Speak.
(KATERINA SINGING)
Well, one part excels at least.
(MOZART CLAPPING)
Bravo! Bravo!
Bravo! Bravo!
That'll do for today. Thank you.
Thank you, Court Composer. Thank you.
Bravo, Court Composer. Sounding magnificent.
Bravo, Court Composer. Sounding magnificent.
Don't. Don't pretend it's something it's not.
I know you know.
I know you know.
Of anyone in this city, you know.
I mean, it doesn't disgrace you, at least.
I have done better work than this.
Armida, now there was an opera.
Armida, now there was an opera.
There was an opera. Yes, indeed. (CHUCKLES)
I'm trying to compose something new, but it's not coming to me.
I've had dry spells before.
I've had dry spells before.
The voice leaves me for periods, but it always comes back.
But you can't help... fear...
But you can't help... fear...
..what if.
What if?
What if. What if it doesn't come back?
Wait there a moment.
Oh, no. Here we are.Oh, no.
As a thank-you. Bit strong.
As a thank-you. Bit strong.
(POPS CORK)
It used to be that I could find His voice
as easily as I found my own.
His?
God's.
Oh, yes. Him.
You don't believe what we do is divine?
This... this is a gift.
It's given to us, no?
Music is the closest man gets to conversing with God.
Music is the closest man gets to conversing with God.
And if this is a conversation with God,
are not composers the ones speaking in His voice?
Let's have a look.
Mm...
I mean...
..a few lines and dots...
..a few lines and dots...
It's just instructions, isn't it?
Mathematical instructions.
I mean, are these methods to capture the voices of angels
I mean, are these methods to capture the voices of angels
or merely a command to an oboe player?
I believe it's more than that. I believe it must be a holy gift.
I believe it's more than that. I believe it must be a holy gift.
Holy gift? I mean, say it is God...
..who gives us this...
..who gives us this...
..fucking hell, I wish he'd leave me alone sometimes.
It's constant, the bombardment.
The arrangements, the variations.
What's he trying to say with it all?
It'll be full in a week.
(BOTTLE UNCORKS)
The watchers...
The watchers...
..come to accept our offerings.
I keep having this dream.
I'm, um, walking through my house, and I hear a noise,
I'm, um, walking through my house, and I hear a noise,
and I look out, and I see that there's an audience watching me.
And they watch as I...
And they watch as I...
..sleep and eat and drink and...
..perform all the human acts a man might perform.
..perform all the human acts a man might perform.
And they applaud at the end. At the end, they applaud.
But they never stand.
And it kills me.
They like it well enough.
They like it well enough.
My little performance.
I know that when they leave the theatre
I know that when they leave the theatre
and they return to their homes,
the memory of me will fade.
(PLAYS A GENTLE TUNE)
I used to write all night long.
I used to write all night long.
Pages upon pages of music, just flowing.
(CONTINUES PLAYING)
(CONTINUES PLAYING)
(STOPS PLAYING) Not anymore.
Oof, my goodness.
Sorry.
Sounds like you're a little bit blocked, Herr Salieri.
Sounds like you're a little bit blocked, Herr Salieri.
Maybe you need to try to flush the pipes out somehow.
How do you mean?
(BOTTLE UNCORKS)
(BOTTLE UNCORKS)
I noticed you paying Frau Cavalieri
a bit of extra attention just now.
So?
Maybe you need to try a different kind of night music, Court Composer.
See if that helps.
(SIGHS)
Night music.
(SOFT MOANS ECHOING)
(MOANING GROWS LOUDER)
(PANTING)
(DRUMMING)
(PIANO KEYS JAR)
(PIANO KEYS JAR)
(PANTING HEAVILY)
(ROUSING MUSIC)
(KNOCKING)
Hello. Hello.
Just checking you were alright.
Not drinking yourself into a stupor or anything.
No, I am alright, thank you.
No, I am alright, thank you.
Oh, yes, another one.
(ENVELOPE TEARS)
Your father?
Will he be there tonight?
No.
Well, fuck him, then.
Bye.
(TRIUMPHANT ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)
(KATERINA SINGING IN GERMAN)
(CHORUS SINGING)
(SPEECH INDISTINCT)
(CHORUS SINGING)
(HIGH-PITCHED RINGING)
(MUSIC BECOMES DISTORTED)
(AUDIENCE CHEERING)
(CHEERING CONTINUES)
(CHEERING CONTINUES) Bravo! Bravo!
Do sit down. Sit down, sit down.
Bravo, bravo! Well done.
Excellent performance.
Excellent performance.
Ah, my dear, you were radiant.
Thank you, Your Majesty. Bravo!
Bravo!
That was...
Well, that was...
It was very interesting.
And new, it felt very new.
Thank you, Majesty.
Thank you, Majesty.
Although, of course, perhaps not without its faults,
though, uh... I'm sure that's only to be expected.
Faults, Your Majesty?
Faults, Your Majesty?
Well, yes, um...
Yes, it just felt at times that there were...
Well, perhaps there were just... (TUTS)
Well, perhaps there were just... (TUTS)
..uh, too many notes.
Too many notes?
Too many notes?
Yes, too many notes.
There are only so many notes that an audience can listen to
of an evening, before one cannot take any more.
(CHUCKLES)
(CHUCKLES)
It did feel at times as though one was being slightly bombarded.
With notes. With notes, yes.
You agree, Court Composer?
You agree, Court Composer?
Uh... Yes, Your Majesty.
Uh... Yes, Your Majesty.
You're not wrong.
A piece can become too busy.
It's a mistake a young composer can easily make.
Well, it was a very fine opera all the same.
Just perhaps remove some of the notes,
and it'll be perfect.
and it'll be perfect.
Yes.
Which notes, uh, did you have in mind, Emperor?
One more round of applause for our young composer and his...
..his fine performers.
(APPLAUSE CONTINUES)
(MEN LAUGHING)
(LIVELY CHATTER) MOZART: Herr Salieri!
How could you do that? What?
Why didn't you stand up for the music?
It's politics, Mozart. You can't disagree with the Emperor.
It's politics, Mozart. You can't disagree with the Emperor.
I didn't ask why you didn't stand up for me.
I asked why you didn't stand up for the music.
It was perfect.
How could you stand there as a composer
How could you stand there as a composer
and just agree with him?
He liked the piece.
I'm sure there'll be another. Take the victory.
I'm sure there'll be another. Take the victory.
You know, just because you're stuck
rehashing boring old operas, doesn't mean I have to be.
Maybe God doesn't speak to you because you fucking bore him!
Maybe God doesn't speak to you because you fucking bore him!
(CARRIAGE DOOR OPENS)
(CARRIAGE DOOR SLAMS)
(CARRIAGE DOOR SLAMS)
(SIGHS)
(HOOVES TROTTING)
(OPERA REPLAYS IN MOZART'S HEAD)
"Too many notes!"
"Too many notes!"
Ridiculous criticism. The Emperor couldn't hear it.
Most people couldn't hear it. But I could.
I could hear even then what he was.
And what he would become.
It wasn't then, though, it was later,
a month or so later,
at a performance in the palace gardens.
at a performance in the palace gardens.
MOZART: Excuse me. Sorry.
Sorry, I'm late.
Excuse me. FOOTMAN: Thank you, sir.
Excuse me. Sorry.
'He managed to get in one final insult,
'He managed to get in one final insult,
delivered as only he could.
Ladies and gentlemen,
we would like to begin with a new composition.
It's a modest piece,
but I wrote it in the small hours of the night,
but I wrote it in the small hours of the night,
as if a voice was speaking to me...
..and only to me.
If you look under your chairs,
If you look under your chairs,
the details are on the back of your programmes.
SALIERI: 'Perhaps it was in that moment I knew
SALIERI: 'Perhaps it was in that moment I knew
what I was going to do.
CONSTANZE: The moment you knew you were going to do what?
I was gonna kill Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart.
I was gonna kill Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart.
(UNSETTLING MUSIC)
Yes.
# "Eine Kleine Nachtmusik" #
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