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1
00:00:09,313 --> 00:00:11,750
[music - "danny boy"]
2
00:00:30,160 --> 00:00:31,031
Kathy, sweetheart.
3
00:00:31,161 --> 00:00:32,075
KATHY: Yes?
4
00:00:32,206 --> 00:00:33,163
I'm going to rehearsal, honey.
5
00:00:33,294 --> 00:00:35,209
KATHY: OK, bye.
6
00:00:35,339 --> 00:00:36,123
Love?
7
00:00:36,253 --> 00:00:37,385
KATHY: Yeah?
8
00:00:37,515 --> 00:00:39,996
Now who's moving
my golf set around?
9
00:00:40,127 --> 00:00:41,780
KATHY: I don't know.
10
00:00:41,911 --> 00:00:44,783
Well, sweetheart, if you don't
mind, I like to leave them in--
11
00:00:44,914 --> 00:00:47,308
Kathy!
12
00:00:47,438 --> 00:00:49,701
Oh, boy, you're so noisy.
13
00:00:49,832 --> 00:00:51,486
You think I'm noisy?
14
00:00:51,616 --> 00:00:53,140
Wait till you hear me if you
haven't got the right answer.
15
00:00:53,270 --> 00:00:54,750
Huh?
What answer?
16
00:00:54,880 --> 00:00:55,664
My five iron is missing.
17
00:00:55,794 --> 00:00:56,752
Where's my five iron?
18
00:00:56,882 --> 00:00:58,188
Oh, honey, it's not missing.
19
00:00:58,319 --> 00:00:59,537
Oh, thank goodness.
20
00:00:59,668 --> 00:01:00,930
It's over there with
the fireplace set.
21
00:01:05,630 --> 00:01:06,414
My five iron?
22
00:01:06,544 --> 00:01:07,676
With the fireplace set?
23
00:01:07,806 --> 00:01:08,764
What's it doing there?
24
00:01:08,894 --> 00:01:10,070
Well, I used it for a poker.
25
00:01:15,466 --> 00:01:18,556
You used my brand new
five iron for a poker?
26
00:01:18,687 --> 00:01:19,949
Well, the regular
one was broken,
27
00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:21,864
and I had to move the logs.
28
00:01:21,994 --> 00:01:25,476
You moved the logs
with my five iron!
29
00:01:25,607 --> 00:01:28,349
Kathleen O'Hara Williams,
what's the matter with you?
30
00:01:28,479 --> 00:01:29,654
I--
31
00:01:29,785 --> 00:01:30,960
You some kind of
nut or something?
32
00:01:31,091 --> 00:01:33,571
You don't use a five
iron to move logs!
33
00:01:33,702 --> 00:01:35,704
I used the wrong club?
34
00:01:35,834 --> 00:01:39,055
Cut that out!
35
00:01:39,186 --> 00:01:40,709
Used the wrong club.
36
00:01:40,839 --> 00:01:42,276
Don't touch these clubs.
37
00:01:42,406 --> 00:01:43,668
These are made
especially for me.
38
00:01:43,799 --> 00:01:44,973
Jimmy [inaudible] my
buddy made them for me.
39
00:01:45,104 --> 00:01:46,584
I waited six months for them.
40
00:01:46,715 --> 00:01:49,805
Tempered steel, well balanced,
weighted for my swing.
41
00:01:49,935 --> 00:01:53,417
All right, what do I
knew about golf clubs?
42
00:01:53,548 --> 00:01:55,115
I don't know anything
about women's clothes,
43
00:01:55,245 --> 00:01:59,858
but I wouldn't cut up your
girdle into slingshots.
44
00:01:59,989 --> 00:02:02,426
[inaudible] damaged five iron.
45
00:02:02,557 --> 00:02:03,601
Oh, it doesn't
look damaged to me.
46
00:02:03,732 --> 00:02:04,559
Let me see.
47
00:02:04,689 --> 00:02:05,560
Don't touch it.
48
00:02:08,562 --> 00:02:09,781
Moving logs.
49
00:02:09,912 --> 00:02:13,350
I think you made a
seven iron out of it.
50
00:02:13,481 --> 00:02:16,571
All this fuss over
one little club.
51
00:02:16,701 --> 00:02:21,184
Gosh, you've got a
whole bag full of them.
52
00:02:21,315 --> 00:02:22,359
It seems to me--
53
00:02:22,490 --> 00:02:23,665
I don't care what
it seems to you
54
00:02:23,795 --> 00:02:25,536
or what it doesn't
seem to you, Kathy.
55
00:02:25,667 --> 00:02:27,625
Kindly keep your hands
off my golf clubs.
56
00:02:27,756 --> 00:02:29,584
If that's asking too
much, let me know.
57
00:02:29,714 --> 00:02:30,585
OK?
58
00:02:30,715 --> 00:02:31,586
Keep your hands off them.
59
00:02:31,716 --> 00:02:33,849
Hi, Danny.
60
00:02:33,978 --> 00:02:35,024
Hi!
61
00:02:35,155 --> 00:02:36,634
Bye, Danny.
62
00:02:36,765 --> 00:02:38,549
What's with Smiley?
63
00:02:38,680 --> 00:02:40,595
I touched one
of his golf clubs.
64
00:02:40,725 --> 00:02:43,554
Oh, the crime of the century.
65
00:02:43,685 --> 00:02:44,599
Sit down, Bunny.
66
00:02:44,728 --> 00:02:45,730
I just made some fresh coffee.
67
00:02:45,861 --> 00:02:48,124
I'll go get it.
68
00:02:48,255 --> 00:02:49,560
Observe.
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00:02:49,691 --> 00:02:52,172
Bunny, what a
gorgeous dinner ring.
70
00:02:52,302 --> 00:02:53,390
Where'd you get it?
71
00:02:53,521 --> 00:02:54,522
Charlie gave it
to me this morning.
72
00:02:54,652 --> 00:02:55,436
Oh, what, occasion?
73
00:02:55,566 --> 00:02:56,567
An argument.
74
00:03:00,789 --> 00:03:02,747
Well, Charlie blew his
stack a few days ago
75
00:03:02,878 --> 00:03:05,576
about some insignificant
little thing.
76
00:03:05,707 --> 00:03:06,621
Like what?
77
00:03:06,751 --> 00:03:07,839
I gave his bowling ball away.
78
00:03:10,494 --> 00:03:12,235
Oh, Bunny, you didn't.
79
00:03:12,366 --> 00:03:14,368
Well, the girls needed
something for a charity bazaar.
80
00:03:14,498 --> 00:03:16,108
Besides, he hasn't
bowled in months.
81
00:03:16,239 --> 00:03:18,241
Well, when Charlie
found out about it,
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00:03:18,372 --> 00:03:20,896
you should have
heard the mouse roar.
83
00:03:21,026 --> 00:03:22,637
I don't blame him.
84
00:03:22,767 --> 00:03:24,813
He started roaring at me,
and I roared right back again,
85
00:03:24,943 --> 00:03:26,945
and that got him upset,
so he roared again.
86
00:03:27,076 --> 00:03:28,860
And you roared right back.
87
00:03:28,991 --> 00:03:31,428
No, I burst into tears
and fled to my room,
88
00:03:31,559 --> 00:03:33,778
my little heart broken.
89
00:03:33,909 --> 00:03:36,390
He came pitter-patting right
after I knocked on the door,
90
00:03:36,520 --> 00:03:39,958
but I just go
away, just go away.
91
00:03:40,089 --> 00:03:41,221
He went.
92
00:03:41,351 --> 00:03:42,961
Right down to the
jeweler's and came
93
00:03:43,091 --> 00:03:44,833
crawling back with this, just
begging for my forgiveness.
94
00:03:44,963 --> 00:03:48,053
It was a pitiful sight.
95
00:03:48,184 --> 00:03:50,839
But hey, Kathy?
96
00:03:50,969 --> 00:03:53,841
Did you ever get that hat you
like so much at [inaudible]
97
00:03:53,972 --> 00:03:56,279
Oh, Bunny, I was just
looking at that hat.
98
00:03:56,410 --> 00:03:58,368
It's much too expensive for me.
99
00:03:58,499 --> 00:04:00,979
I think you're
going to get that hat.
100
00:04:01,110 --> 00:04:02,981
I have a hunch
that Danny is going
101
00:04:03,112 --> 00:04:04,983
to want to buy you that hat.
102
00:04:05,114 --> 00:04:06,637
What are you talking about?
103
00:04:06,768 --> 00:04:07,943
If I were married
to Danny, I'd
104
00:04:08,073 --> 00:04:11,033
have a whole millinery shop.
105
00:04:11,163 --> 00:04:13,775
Kathy, you have got
a natural there.
106
00:04:13,905 --> 00:04:16,212
Now some men have a
high boiling point.
107
00:04:16,343 --> 00:04:18,692
It's almost impossible
to make them explode.
108
00:04:18,822 --> 00:04:20,564
But you, you're married
to Mount Vesuvius.
109
00:04:23,175 --> 00:04:25,656
So the next time he erupts,
you erupt right back again.
110
00:04:25,787 --> 00:04:26,875
And bingo, before
you know it, you're
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00:04:27,005 --> 00:04:28,659
in a full fledged argument.
112
00:04:28,790 --> 00:04:32,402
But when he's right at the peak
of the argument, stop arguing.
113
00:04:32,533 --> 00:04:34,404
Let your little lower
lip kind of tremble,
114
00:04:34,534 --> 00:04:37,799
and then let your eyes moist up,
a bit and then break into tears
115
00:04:37,929 --> 00:04:39,453
and flee to your room.
116
00:04:39,582 --> 00:04:41,716
Kathy, there is nothing that
cuts a man more than that.
117
00:04:41,846 --> 00:04:44,501
They-- well, they just
beg for your forgiveness.
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00:04:44,632 --> 00:04:48,592
So forgive them, after they buy
you a little thing like this.
119
00:04:48,723 --> 00:04:51,073
Or in your case, the
hate from [inaudible]
120
00:04:51,203 --> 00:04:53,641
Why, Bunny Halper, that--
121
00:04:53,771 --> 00:04:57,732
that's the most scheming,
conniving, deceitful piece
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00:04:57,862 --> 00:05:00,169
of chicanery I've ever heard.
123
00:05:00,300 --> 00:05:02,693
Yes, isn't it?
124
00:05:02,824 --> 00:05:06,915
It's nothing any red blooded
American girl couldn't do.
125
00:05:07,045 --> 00:05:09,570
You're not
expecting me to do--
126
00:05:09,700 --> 00:05:11,311
You want that hat, don't you?
127
00:05:14,705 --> 00:05:18,056
Oh, you think I could?
128
00:05:18,187 --> 00:05:19,754
Oh, Bunny, I couldn't.
129
00:05:19,884 --> 00:05:20,885
It's so sneaky.
130
00:05:21,016 --> 00:05:22,234
Well, what's sneaky?
131
00:05:22,365 --> 00:05:24,236
Danny deserves it.
132
00:05:24,367 --> 00:05:26,021
I mean, if he's going
to blow up like this,
133
00:05:26,151 --> 00:05:28,415
he should pay for it.
134
00:05:28,545 --> 00:05:32,984
And Kathy, listen, you'd
really be doing him some good.
135
00:05:33,115 --> 00:05:36,118
Teaching him self-control.
136
00:05:36,248 --> 00:05:38,425
I never thought
of it that way.
137
00:05:38,555 --> 00:05:41,515
I would be doing him
some good, wouldn't I?
138
00:05:41,645 --> 00:05:43,952
Teaching him something.
139
00:05:44,082 --> 00:05:46,433
It's my duty, isn't it?
140
00:05:46,563 --> 00:05:49,436
Like a missionary.
141
00:05:49,566 --> 00:05:51,133
She wouldn't touch them again.
142
00:05:51,263 --> 00:05:53,091
If those clubs fell on
her feet she wouldn't
143
00:05:53,222 --> 00:05:54,049
bend down to touch them.
144
00:05:54,179 --> 00:05:55,311
I gave it to her today.
145
00:05:55,442 --> 00:05:56,878
I screamed and
yelled and hollered
146
00:05:57,008 --> 00:05:58,183
and I really shook her up.
147
00:05:58,314 --> 00:05:59,924
You shook her up?
148
00:06:00,055 --> 00:06:03,232
I yelled so loud I cracked
the plaster of the apartment.
149
00:06:03,363 --> 00:06:07,845
I hit such a note I think only
Lebanese dogs could hear me.
150
00:06:07,976 --> 00:06:09,020
Oh, that's great.
151
00:06:09,151 --> 00:06:10,674
You can be real
proud of yourself.
152
00:06:10,805 --> 00:06:12,502
Yep.
153
00:06:12,633 --> 00:06:17,072
A big guy like you, shakes up
a sweet little 112 pound wife.
154
00:06:17,202 --> 00:06:19,814
Danny, Danny, is that
what you had in mind
155
00:06:19,944 --> 00:06:22,947
when you promised to love,
honor, and cherish your wife?
156
00:06:23,078 --> 00:06:26,560
Did you promise to
yell and scream at her?
157
00:06:26,690 --> 00:06:29,650
Listen to you.
158
00:06:29,780 --> 00:06:33,218
Listen to Charlie the preacher.
159
00:06:33,349 --> 00:06:37,222
I've heard you scream at Bunny
like a wounded bull elephant.
160
00:06:37,353 --> 00:06:39,486
That's the old Charlie Halper.
161
00:06:39,616 --> 00:06:42,532
You are now looking at
the new Charlie Halper.
162
00:06:42,663 --> 00:06:44,404
Ever since the other night
when I made Bunny cry,
163
00:06:44,534 --> 00:06:46,275
I said that's it, no more.
164
00:06:46,406 --> 00:06:47,407
You made Bunny cry?
165
00:06:47,537 --> 00:06:49,452
You know me, my
mouth is always
166
00:06:49,582 --> 00:06:54,022
flapping first and checking
with my brains later.
167
00:06:54,152 --> 00:06:56,807
A lot of times I make
her cry and when I do it
168
00:06:56,938 --> 00:06:58,243
I feel like a dog.
169
00:06:58,374 --> 00:07:02,030
So I try to find my way
back into the human race
170
00:07:02,160 --> 00:07:03,858
by giving her a little present.
171
00:07:03,988 --> 00:07:07,078
And I usually try to give her
something I know she wants.
172
00:07:07,209 --> 00:07:10,995
And she wanted a dinner ring,
so I went out and got her one.
173
00:07:11,126 --> 00:07:14,216
You mean every time
you make your wife cry,
174
00:07:14,346 --> 00:07:16,000
you buy her a present?
175
00:07:16,131 --> 00:07:17,437
Yeah, but no more.
176
00:07:17,567 --> 00:07:18,786
I've been thinking.
177
00:07:18,916 --> 00:07:21,266
We got a baby on the way.
178
00:07:21,397 --> 00:07:25,314
And how is my son going to
feel about me if I bully
179
00:07:25,445 --> 00:07:26,663
his mother till she cries?
180
00:07:30,493 --> 00:07:33,061
Golly, Charlie.
181
00:07:33,191 --> 00:07:34,715
If I ever made Kathy cry
in front of the kids,
182
00:07:34,845 --> 00:07:36,238
I think I'd want to
jump in the lake.
183
00:07:36,368 --> 00:07:37,935
You better watch
your step, buddy.
184
00:07:38,066 --> 00:07:39,937
I'll tell you, you know every
woman has a breaking point,
185
00:07:40,068 --> 00:07:41,983
and Danny, you keep going this
way you're going to make it.
186
00:07:42,113 --> 00:07:45,508
Charlie, every man has
a breaking point, too.
187
00:07:45,639 --> 00:07:47,205
She steamed me up.
188
00:07:47,336 --> 00:07:50,600
Well, she picked the wrong
time to do the wrong thing.
189
00:07:50,731 --> 00:07:53,255
She knows that I'm always
edgy and nervous and irritable
190
00:07:53,385 --> 00:07:55,300
when I'm rehearsing a new show.
191
00:07:55,431 --> 00:07:56,867
So I blew my stack.
192
00:07:56,998 --> 00:07:58,826
I'm telling you, I'm so
steamed up at her right now,
193
00:07:58,956 --> 00:08:00,567
I don't know how I'm going
to rehearse this new show.
194
00:08:00,697 --> 00:08:02,003
You want to know
something, Danny?
195
00:08:02,133 --> 00:08:03,178
You're not steamed
up at her, you're
196
00:08:03,308 --> 00:08:04,527
steamed up with yourself.
197
00:08:04,658 --> 00:08:06,311
What?
198
00:08:06,442 --> 00:08:07,748
I mean, you may have been mad
for a minute or two because she
199
00:08:07,878 --> 00:08:10,228
used your five iron
for a poker, but that's
200
00:08:10,359 --> 00:08:11,491
not what you're mad about now.
201
00:08:11,621 --> 00:08:12,927
Oh, no, no.
202
00:08:13,057 --> 00:08:13,971
You're mad at yourself
for losing your temper
203
00:08:14,102 --> 00:08:14,972
and yelling at her.
204
00:08:19,107 --> 00:08:21,022
I sure did yell at her.
205
00:08:21,152 --> 00:08:22,327
You feel like
a snake now, huh?
206
00:08:22,457 --> 00:08:23,372
Yeah.
207
00:08:27,028 --> 00:08:27,811
Why do I do it?
208
00:08:27,942 --> 00:08:29,639
Why do I do it?
209
00:08:29,770 --> 00:08:34,296
How can a big ox like me abuse
and humiliate a sweet little
210
00:08:34,426 --> 00:08:35,950
defenseless thing like Kathy?
211
00:08:36,080 --> 00:08:37,429
Why, why, why?
212
00:08:37,559 --> 00:08:39,082
I know why.
213
00:08:39,213 --> 00:08:40,084
Because you're rotten.
214
00:08:45,307 --> 00:08:47,352
Yeah, but no more.
215
00:08:47,483 --> 00:08:49,703
I'm taking a page
from you, Charlie.
216
00:08:49,833 --> 00:08:53,489
From now on, no more yelling,
no more screaming at my wife.
217
00:08:53,620 --> 00:08:56,100
From now on the secret word
with me is going to be smiling.
218
00:08:56,231 --> 00:08:57,754
- That will be the day.
- I mean it, I mean it.
219
00:08:57,885 --> 00:08:59,364
I know you, Danny.
220
00:08:59,495 --> 00:09:01,062
I'm going to be as gentle
as a kitten with my wife,
221
00:09:01,192 --> 00:09:04,021
no matter what she does, I'm
not going to lose my temper.
222
00:09:04,152 --> 00:09:05,980
Danny, if you mean
that, baby, I'm with you.
223
00:09:06,110 --> 00:09:09,461
Charlie, you don't know what
a help it was talking to you.
224
00:09:09,592 --> 00:09:10,898
Now I think you can
get some work done.
225
00:09:11,028 --> 00:09:11,899
I'll go back to rehearsal.
I'll see you later.
226
00:09:12,029 --> 00:09:12,813
Good.
227
00:09:12,943 --> 00:09:14,075
Oh, Dan?
228
00:09:14,205 --> 00:09:16,120
On your way home
tonight, if you really
229
00:09:16,251 --> 00:09:18,514
want to make Kathy
feel like you're sorry,
230
00:09:18,645 --> 00:09:20,472
why don't you buy
her a little present?
231
00:09:20,603 --> 00:09:21,386
Why?
232
00:09:21,517 --> 00:09:22,474
I didn't make her cry.
233
00:09:36,358 --> 00:09:38,316
Hello, sweetheart.
234
00:09:38,447 --> 00:09:41,537
Hello, Danny.
235
00:09:41,668 --> 00:09:46,368
Angel, I'm terribly sorry
I yelled at you this morning.
236
00:09:46,498 --> 00:09:47,587
Let's forget it, shall we?
237
00:09:52,417 --> 00:09:54,289
OK, that's a real
good idea, honey.
238
00:09:54,419 --> 00:09:55,943
Let's just forget it.
239
00:09:56,073 --> 00:09:58,336
That's make like
it never happened.
240
00:09:58,467 --> 00:10:00,687
What's-- what's for dinner?
241
00:10:00,817 --> 00:10:02,384
I'm starved.
242
00:10:02,514 --> 00:10:03,951
You are?
243
00:10:04,081 --> 00:10:05,256
Yeah, the guys in the band
sent out for sandwiches,
244
00:10:05,387 --> 00:10:06,562
but I said, not me.
245
00:10:06,693 --> 00:10:08,042
Not me, I'm not
spoiling my appetite.
246
00:10:08,172 --> 00:10:09,565
Not for my wife's
wonderful cooking.
247
00:10:09,696 --> 00:10:12,176
I had them drooling
talking about your cooking.
248
00:10:12,307 --> 00:10:13,613
What'd you make
for dinner, honey.
249
00:10:13,743 --> 00:10:14,570
For your dinner.
250
00:10:14,701 --> 00:10:15,527
Well.
251
00:10:15,658 --> 00:10:17,268
I've had a very busy day.
252
00:10:17,399 --> 00:10:19,009
I was out shopping all
day long with Bunny,
253
00:10:19,140 --> 00:10:20,968
and I just got home,
and I've got to change
254
00:10:21,098 --> 00:10:23,361
the buttons on this blouse.
255
00:10:23,492 --> 00:10:27,452
You mean you haven't
started dinner?
256
00:10:27,583 --> 00:10:29,716
As a matter of fact,
I'm not a bit hungry.
257
00:10:29,846 --> 00:10:31,718
I had a great big lunch today.
258
00:10:36,374 --> 00:10:39,073
That's nice, but what
about the kids and me?
259
00:10:39,203 --> 00:10:42,163
Oh, well, I do
have some hamburger
260
00:10:42,293 --> 00:10:43,251
patties in the freezer.
261
00:10:43,381 --> 00:10:44,731
Oh, that's good.
262
00:10:44,861 --> 00:10:45,862
Enough for the children.
263
00:10:48,778 --> 00:10:51,999
I can open a can
of beans for you.
264
00:10:52,129 --> 00:10:53,696
Beans?
265
00:10:53,827 --> 00:10:54,784
A can of beans?
266
00:10:54,915 --> 00:10:56,786
That's going to be my dinner?
267
00:10:56,917 --> 00:10:59,833
Well, what's wrong with that?
268
00:10:59,963 --> 00:11:00,834
Nothing.
269
00:11:06,796 --> 00:11:10,713
I think beans are
nice for a change.
270
00:11:10,844 --> 00:11:13,063
Well, you don't have
to be so noble about it.
271
00:11:13,194 --> 00:11:15,544
I have a right to fritter
away a day once in a while.
272
00:11:15,675 --> 00:11:19,679
I shouldn't have to cook a
regular meal every night.
273
00:11:19,809 --> 00:11:21,593
Lover, there's
nothing to yell about.
274
00:11:31,429 --> 00:11:32,474
Linda, why are
you sitting there?
275
00:11:32,604 --> 00:11:33,605
You're going to be
late for school.
276
00:11:33,736 --> 00:11:34,476
I know.
277
00:11:34,606 --> 00:11:35,390
I'm waiting for Rusty.
278
00:11:35,520 --> 00:11:37,566
He's such a slowpoke.
279
00:11:37,697 --> 00:11:38,915
Here, put your sweater on.
280
00:11:39,046 --> 00:11:40,134
Why don't you call him?
281
00:11:40,264 --> 00:11:41,744
I can't.
282
00:11:41,875 --> 00:11:43,920
Daddy's still sleeping, and
you know how mad he gets
283
00:11:44,051 --> 00:11:47,141
when we shout and wake him up.
284
00:11:47,271 --> 00:11:49,752
Oh that's right, he
does get mad when we shout
285
00:11:49,883 --> 00:11:50,971
and wake him up, doesn't he?
286
00:11:51,101 --> 00:11:51,885
He sure does.
287
00:11:52,015 --> 00:11:53,582
He just blows his top.
288
00:11:57,368 --> 00:12:00,197
[SHOUTING] Rusty!
289
00:12:00,328 --> 00:12:01,633
You'll wake Daddy up.
290
00:12:01,764 --> 00:12:03,679
Oh, I have to get Rusty
off to school, darling.
291
00:12:03,810 --> 00:12:05,159
[SHOUTING] Rusty, darling!
292
00:12:05,289 --> 00:12:08,945
You'll be late for school!
293
00:12:09,076 --> 00:12:11,295
Come on!
294
00:12:11,426 --> 00:12:13,776
[loud whistle]
295
00:12:15,778 --> 00:12:16,866
What's the matter?
296
00:12:16,997 --> 00:12:19,826
What is it?
297
00:12:19,956 --> 00:12:21,741
Who's there?
298
00:12:21,871 --> 00:12:26,615
[inaudible] What's wrong?
299
00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:29,096
What's the matter?
300
00:12:29,226 --> 00:12:34,536
I'm so sorry, I didn't
mean to wake you up.
301
00:12:34,665 --> 00:12:36,843
[muttering] What's the matter?
302
00:12:36,973 --> 00:12:38,758
What's the matter?
303
00:12:38,888 --> 00:12:42,370
Well, I was just trying
to get Rusty off to school.
304
00:12:42,500 --> 00:12:43,980
[muttering]
305
00:13:02,259 --> 00:13:05,872
You know how much sleep I had?
306
00:13:06,002 --> 00:13:08,004
Three hours or so.
307
00:13:08,135 --> 00:13:10,528
Three hours, got in at 4:30
in the morning, three shows,
308
00:13:10,659 --> 00:13:12,269
like three hours I slept.
309
00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:15,925
Three hours is plenty
of sleep for anyone.
310
00:13:16,056 --> 00:13:19,450
Three hours is a long time.
311
00:13:19,581 --> 00:13:21,844
Just try hanging by your
nose for three hours.
312
00:13:28,590 --> 00:13:30,766
Yeah.
313
00:13:30,897 --> 00:13:34,335
Three hours is enough
sleep for anybody.
314
00:13:34,465 --> 00:13:38,382
I couldn't go back to sleep
now even if I wanted to.
315
00:13:43,866 --> 00:13:45,781
Is Daddy sick?
316
00:13:45,912 --> 00:13:47,870
I don't know, he certainly
doesn't act like himself.
317
00:13:50,960 --> 00:13:52,744
Why is dad
sleeping on the sofa?
318
00:13:52,875 --> 00:13:55,269
He's not sleeping,
he's just relaxing.
319
00:13:55,399 --> 00:13:56,748
Now Rusty, you're going
to be late for school.
320
00:13:56,879 --> 00:13:59,273
So yell goodbye to him.
321
00:13:59,403 --> 00:14:02,363
Yell goodbye?
322
00:14:02,493 --> 00:14:05,061
You want him to
hear you, don't you?
323
00:14:05,192 --> 00:14:06,541
Oh, no, I'm too young to die.
324
00:14:06,671 --> 00:14:07,542
Rusty.
325
00:14:10,240 --> 00:14:11,589
You do as I say.
326
00:14:11,720 --> 00:14:13,809
Now all together,
after I count three,
327
00:14:13,940 --> 00:14:16,725
yell goodbye good and loud.
328
00:14:16,856 --> 00:14:19,206
One, two, three.
329
00:14:19,336 --> 00:14:20,772
ALL: [SHOUTING] Goodbye!
330
00:14:25,125 --> 00:14:27,127
It was my fault,
it was all my fault.
331
00:14:27,257 --> 00:14:28,824
I told them to say
goodbye to you.
332
00:14:28,955 --> 00:14:30,957
Now don't you dare yell at me.
333
00:14:31,087 --> 00:14:34,438
Don't you dare yell at me!
334
00:14:34,569 --> 00:14:35,700
Yell at me!
335
00:14:40,357 --> 00:14:44,361
Honey, whatever you
do, lover, don't cry.
336
00:14:53,066 --> 00:14:54,632
DANNY: Kathy?
337
00:14:54,763 --> 00:14:56,504
Yes, dear?
338
00:14:56,634 --> 00:14:59,246
DANNY: Honey, what
happened to my shorts?
339
00:14:59,376 --> 00:15:03,903
Oh, dear, don't you like
the way I laundered them?
340
00:15:04,033 --> 00:15:05,382
DANNY: You laundered these?
341
00:15:12,912 --> 00:15:15,871
Oh my gosh, you know?
342
00:15:18,439 --> 00:15:21,833
You know, I'll bet that
wasn't water softener I
343
00:15:21,964 --> 00:15:23,748
put it in the washing machine.
344
00:15:23,879 --> 00:15:25,968
That's a good bet.
345
00:15:26,099 --> 00:15:27,665
I'll bet it was starch.
346
00:15:27,796 --> 00:15:30,886
That's another good bet.
347
00:15:31,017 --> 00:15:34,803
I'll bet you don't like
starch in your shorts, do you?
348
00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:36,457
You just won a
three way parlay.
349
00:15:40,113 --> 00:15:41,462
So, I made a mistake.
350
00:15:41,592 --> 00:15:43,594
I'm sorry.
351
00:15:43,725 --> 00:15:48,599
Well, nothing to fuss about.
352
00:15:48,730 --> 00:15:49,470
Is isn't?
353
00:15:49,600 --> 00:15:50,601
No.
354
00:15:50,732 --> 00:15:52,647
I'll just wear another pair.
355
00:15:52,777 --> 00:15:54,779
Oh, I starched all
your shorts that way.
356
00:16:05,442 --> 00:16:07,967
[laughing]
357
00:16:11,622 --> 00:16:13,320
What's so funny?
358
00:16:13,450 --> 00:16:15,278
That's funny, a pair of shorts
standing on its own two feet.
359
00:16:19,630 --> 00:16:23,983
Charlie, you know, if
I didn't know her better
360
00:16:24,113 --> 00:16:27,247
I would swear she's going out
of the way to aggravate me.
361
00:16:27,377 --> 00:16:28,726
Danny, will you
stop being silly?
362
00:16:28,857 --> 00:16:33,035
Will you please
relax and sit down?
363
00:16:33,165 --> 00:16:35,559
[crackling]
364
00:16:44,351 --> 00:16:45,569
Well, what was that noise?
365
00:16:49,878 --> 00:16:51,227
My shorts are starched.
366
00:16:57,625 --> 00:16:59,888
Kathy, are you sure
you have done everything
367
00:17:00,019 --> 00:17:01,324
you could to provoke him?
368
00:17:01,455 --> 00:17:04,458
Oh, Bunny, I've been
positively diabolical.
369
00:17:04,588 --> 00:17:06,808
Well, everything you've
done up to now all right,
370
00:17:06,938 --> 00:17:08,505
but now we need the big zinger.
371
00:17:08,636 --> 00:17:10,768
The thing that will just knock
the pins out from under him.
372
00:17:10,898 --> 00:17:11,813
Well, I don't know what to do.
373
00:17:11,943 --> 00:17:13,336
I've run out of ideas.
374
00:17:13,467 --> 00:17:17,297
Never fear, Bunny's here.
375
00:17:17,426 --> 00:17:19,864
Let me see, the last time
he flipped was when you
376
00:17:19,994 --> 00:17:21,170
touched his golf clubs, right?
377
00:17:21,300 --> 00:17:22,084
Right.
378
00:17:22,214 --> 00:17:23,607
Good.
379
00:17:23,738 --> 00:17:26,784
This time you'll donate
them to the salvage drive.
380
00:17:26,915 --> 00:17:28,482
His golf clubs?
381
00:17:28,612 --> 00:17:32,094
That are especially weighed
and balanced for his swing?
382
00:17:32,225 --> 00:17:33,574
You mean I should
give them away?
383
00:17:33,704 --> 00:17:35,663
Oh, no, no, not really.
384
00:17:35,793 --> 00:17:37,447
We'll just hide them.
385
00:17:37,578 --> 00:17:39,188
We'll make believe and pretend
that-- where does he keep them?
386
00:17:39,319 --> 00:17:40,059
In the hall closet.
387
00:17:40,189 --> 00:17:42,017
But, oh, Bunny.
388
00:17:42,148 --> 00:17:44,237
Don't you think we're
going a little too far?
389
00:17:44,367 --> 00:17:46,891
Uh-uh, just far enough.
390
00:17:47,022 --> 00:17:49,633
Kathy, when he finds out
that you have given the golf
391
00:17:49,764 --> 00:17:51,548
clubs away, the lava
is going to shoot
392
00:17:51,679 --> 00:17:53,115
right up through the volcano.
393
00:17:53,246 --> 00:17:54,290
Oh, but Bunny.
394
00:17:54,421 --> 00:17:56,031
Will you relax, Kathy?
395
00:17:56,162 --> 00:17:58,120
I can practically see
you wearing that hat now.
396
00:17:58,251 --> 00:17:59,252
I'll put them in your closet.
397
00:18:04,735 --> 00:18:06,215
Oh, honey.
398
00:18:06,346 --> 00:18:10,176
Oh, what are you doing home
at this time of the day?
399
00:18:10,306 --> 00:18:11,829
Anything wrong with a
husband coming home to have
400
00:18:11,960 --> 00:18:13,309
lunch with his sweetheart?
401
00:18:18,271 --> 00:18:19,228
Hi, Danny.
402
00:18:22,231 --> 00:18:23,885
Hello, Bunny.
403
00:18:24,015 --> 00:18:24,799
How's the baby?
404
00:18:24,929 --> 00:18:25,843
Oh, kicking.
405
00:18:29,195 --> 00:18:30,065
Kathy?
406
00:18:30,196 --> 00:18:31,327
Yes dear?
407
00:18:31,458 --> 00:18:32,850
My golf clubs I
put in a corner here.
408
00:18:32,981 --> 00:18:33,721
Where are they, sweetheart?
409
00:18:33,851 --> 00:18:37,420
Oh, where?
410
00:18:37,551 --> 00:18:38,595
Yeah, honey.
411
00:18:38,726 --> 00:18:39,683
Where?
412
00:18:39,814 --> 00:18:40,684
Well--
413
00:18:40,815 --> 00:18:42,295
Where are my golf clubs?
414
00:18:42,425 --> 00:18:43,687
Well--
415
00:18:43,818 --> 00:18:47,474
Kathy donated them
to the salvage drive.
416
00:18:47,604 --> 00:18:48,475
You're cute.
417
00:18:51,782 --> 00:18:53,828
Where did you put
my golf clubs, love?
418
00:18:53,958 --> 00:18:56,874
Danny, I-- I don't think
you heard me correctly.
419
00:18:57,005 --> 00:19:00,008
I said Kathy gave them
to the salvage drive.
420
00:19:00,139 --> 00:19:00,922
Yes I did, dear.
421
00:19:01,052 --> 00:19:02,271
I really did.
422
00:19:02,402 --> 00:19:04,708
I mean it was a
worthy cause, and I
423
00:19:04,839 --> 00:19:06,057
didn't think you needed them.
424
00:19:10,279 --> 00:19:12,629
You-- you--
425
00:19:15,502 --> 00:19:17,765
ahh!
426
00:19:17,895 --> 00:19:19,767
[vocalizing]
427
00:19:51,146 --> 00:19:56,543
Danny, don't you dare use
that kind of language to me!
428
00:19:56,673 --> 00:19:59,372
Especially in front
of my best friend.
429
00:19:59,502 --> 00:20:04,203
I was never so humiliated
in all my life!
430
00:20:04,333 --> 00:20:06,727
[sobbing]
431
00:20:11,601 --> 00:20:13,429
Don't cry, Kathy.
432
00:20:13,560 --> 00:20:15,953
[sobbing]
433
00:20:33,667 --> 00:20:36,322
Oh, Bunny, I almost hope
he doesn't buy me that hat.
434
00:20:36,452 --> 00:20:39,281
Oh, Kathy, now
don't talk like that.
435
00:20:39,412 --> 00:20:41,979
After all, there is
a principle at stake.
436
00:20:42,110 --> 00:20:43,024
Hm?
437
00:20:43,154 --> 00:20:45,548
Kathy, men are like children.
438
00:20:45,679 --> 00:20:48,464
When they misbehave,
they have to be punished.
439
00:20:48,595 --> 00:20:50,466
They're too big to spank,
so you have to punish
440
00:20:50,597 --> 00:20:51,946
them where they hurt the most.
441
00:20:52,076 --> 00:20:55,123
You have to hit them
in the pocketbook.
442
00:20:55,254 --> 00:20:57,256
After all, Kathy, it's
for their own good.
443
00:20:57,386 --> 00:20:59,867
And we get a little
benefit out of it too.
444
00:20:59,997 --> 00:21:03,305
I guess I just wasn't
cut out to be a missionary.
445
00:21:03,436 --> 00:21:04,654
Now chin up, old girl.
446
00:21:04,785 --> 00:21:07,266
After all, you have
to do to your sex.
447
00:21:07,396 --> 00:21:08,745
Well, I thought I
heard you come in.
448
00:21:08,876 --> 00:21:09,833
Oh, honey.
449
00:21:09,964 --> 00:21:11,748
I-- I didn't know you were home.
450
00:21:11,879 --> 00:21:13,663
Danny, that-- that box.
451
00:21:13,794 --> 00:21:17,188
Isn't it from [inaudible]
452
00:21:17,319 --> 00:21:20,453
It's for Kathy.
453
00:21:20,583 --> 00:21:24,761
Angel, I-- I'm terribly ashamed
of myself for yelling at you,
454
00:21:24,892 --> 00:21:27,024
making you cry.
455
00:21:27,155 --> 00:21:30,027
I was in ogre to do it.
456
00:21:30,158 --> 00:21:34,641
And, well I thought maybe I'd
try to square myself with you
457
00:21:34,771 --> 00:21:37,687
so I knew you wanted this hat.
458
00:21:37,818 --> 00:21:40,690
You talked about it, so
I went to [inaudible]
459
00:21:40,821 --> 00:21:42,431
and bought it for you.
460
00:21:42,562 --> 00:21:45,739
You forgive me?
461
00:21:45,869 --> 00:21:48,307
[sobbing]
462
00:21:50,787 --> 00:21:52,006
What's the matter, sweetheart?
463
00:21:52,136 --> 00:21:55,357
Kathy's so happy
she's crying for joy.
464
00:21:55,488 --> 00:21:58,621
Stop crying for joy
already, and open the box.
465
00:21:58,752 --> 00:22:01,058
I can't take it, I just
can't take it, Bunny.
466
00:22:01,189 --> 00:22:01,972
I can't.
467
00:22:02,103 --> 00:22:03,365
Why not, sweetheart?
468
00:22:03,496 --> 00:22:06,281
Because I'm a
deceitful, conniving wife.
469
00:22:06,412 --> 00:22:09,763
She's so overjoyed, she
doesn't know what she's saying.
470
00:22:09,893 --> 00:22:11,417
No, I don't deserve it.
471
00:22:11,547 --> 00:22:15,334
And I don't deserve a sweet,
wonderful husband like you.
472
00:22:15,464 --> 00:22:19,381
I don't and I'm so
ashamed of myself.
473
00:22:19,512 --> 00:22:23,820
And I don't deserve that hat,
and I want you to take it back.
474
00:22:23,951 --> 00:22:26,823
Sweetheart, if you feel
that way about it, all right.
475
00:22:26,954 --> 00:22:28,085
I do.
476
00:22:28,216 --> 00:22:29,783
I couldn't enjoy
it, really, I just--
477
00:22:29,913 --> 00:22:31,175
Well, think of the fun you
could have hating it, Kathy.
478
00:22:31,306 --> 00:22:32,438
Here.
479
00:22:32,568 --> 00:22:33,787
Please, she doesn't want it.
480
00:22:33,917 --> 00:22:34,788
Of course she does.
481
00:22:34,918 --> 00:22:35,615
No, I don't, Bunny.
482
00:22:35,745 --> 00:22:36,572
No.
483
00:22:36,703 --> 00:22:37,617
Yes you do, Kathy.
484
00:22:37,747 --> 00:22:38,922
She said she doesn't want it.
485
00:22:39,053 --> 00:22:40,271
Of course she wants it.
486
00:22:40,402 --> 00:22:42,578
She will as soon as
she sees what it is.
487
00:22:42,709 --> 00:22:44,232
Oh, I bet it's beautiful, Kathy.
488
00:22:44,363 --> 00:22:47,017
It's something Kathy has
wanted all of her life.
489
00:23:01,858 --> 00:23:05,253
I happened to accidentally
walk into your dressing room
490
00:23:05,384 --> 00:23:09,736
and I saw my golf clubs, and
I realized I was being framed.
491
00:23:09,866 --> 00:23:12,129
But at first I couldn't
figure out why.
492
00:23:12,260 --> 00:23:14,088
Then I began putting
two and two together,
493
00:23:14,218 --> 00:23:16,873
had that talk with
Charlie, made his wife cry,
494
00:23:17,004 --> 00:23:19,441
bought her presents every
time he made his wife cry.
495
00:23:19,572 --> 00:23:22,313
And then you, going out of
your way to aggravate me.
496
00:23:22,444 --> 00:23:23,184
I couldn't figure out.
497
00:23:23,314 --> 00:23:25,621
Then I realized.
498
00:23:25,752 --> 00:23:28,232
And so, little lady, you
think you're kind of smart,
499
00:23:28,363 --> 00:23:29,886
don't you.
500
00:23:30,017 --> 00:23:32,411
You got to get up awfully
early in the morning, child,
501
00:23:32,541 --> 00:23:36,023
to fool me, because
long before the Irish,
502
00:23:36,153 --> 00:23:37,503
there were the Lebanese.
503
00:23:42,551 --> 00:23:45,032
[inaudible]
504
00:23:47,556 --> 00:23:52,909
[squealing]
505
00:23:53,040 --> 00:23:54,868
You come out of there.
506
00:23:54,998 --> 00:23:57,348
Ooh!
507
00:23:57,479 --> 00:23:58,480
Honey, did you hurt yourself?
508
00:24:06,532 --> 00:24:07,968
Oh!
509
00:24:08,098 --> 00:24:09,012
Beautiful!
510
00:24:09,143 --> 00:24:10,057
Oh.
511
00:24:10,187 --> 00:24:12,276
Oh, you got to be kidding.
512
00:24:20,720 --> 00:24:23,462
[music - "danny boy"]
36367
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