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1
00:00:03,971 --> 00:00:06,370
It's gonna be sunny
and 75 this week,
2
00:00:06,371 --> 00:00:08,070
-so if you were dreaming
of a white Christmas... -Jim, hurry.
3
00:00:08,071 --> 00:00:09,302
Amanda's doing the weather.
4
00:00:09,303 --> 00:00:10,668
She does that every weekend.
5
00:00:10,669 --> 00:00:12,676
Well, the Cowboys
play every weekend.
6
00:00:12,778 --> 00:00:14,179
You manage to watch them.
7
00:00:14,281 --> 00:00:17,310
Well, when Mandy has a chance
at the Super Bowl, I'll tune in.
8
00:00:17,412 --> 00:00:19,947
Hey, I'm trying
to listen to my wife.
9
00:00:20,049 --> 00:00:22,520
Sometimes she quizzes me.
10
00:00:23,156 --> 00:00:25,266
Thanks, y'all,
for watching and writing.
11
00:00:25,286 --> 00:00:26,859
Keep those letters coming,
12
00:00:26,860 --> 00:00:28,557
except for you,
Bruce from Texarkana.
13
00:00:28,558 --> 00:00:30,795
You will never see my feet,
Bruce. Stop asking.
14
00:00:30,796 --> 00:00:32,730
So, Merry Christmas,
15
00:00:32,832 --> 00:00:34,627
and from the bottom of my heart,
16
00:00:34,729 --> 00:00:37,463
I am happy to fill in
around here if anyone gets sick
17
00:00:37,566 --> 00:00:39,865
or, God forbid,
has a death in the family.
18
00:00:39,967 --> 00:00:41,238
Smooth.
19
00:00:42,104 --> 00:00:43,906
Speaking of Christmas,
20
00:00:44,008 --> 00:00:45,943
have you talked to your mother?
21
00:00:46,045 --> 00:00:48,141
I'm just trying
to figure out our plans
22
00:00:48,243 --> 00:00:49,803
and how to make things perfect,
23
00:00:49,884 --> 00:00:51,683
but whatever you want's
fine by me.
24
00:00:51,785 --> 00:00:53,745
And the smooth keeps coming.
25
00:00:53,847 --> 00:00:57,315
Of course, your mom got CeeCee
on Christmas last year,
26
00:00:57,417 --> 00:00:59,552
so it seems like it's our turn,
27
00:00:59,654 --> 00:01:03,462
but I don't want to be
difficult. That's her job.
28
00:01:03,564 --> 00:01:05,325
I'll talk to her.
29
00:01:05,427 --> 00:01:09,396
No rush, I just
need to let Santa know
30
00:01:09,498 --> 00:01:12,103
if he should be making
an appearance here.
31
00:01:12,104 --> 00:01:14,166
Well, uh, the Cowboys
are playing on Christmas,
32
00:01:14,167 --> 00:01:15,436
so Santa's busy.
33
00:01:15,538 --> 00:01:18,643
If CeeCee's gonna be here,
Santa's gonna be here.
34
00:01:19,412 --> 00:01:22,947
It's okay, I'm sure Santa can be
in a lot of places at once.
35
00:01:23,049 --> 00:01:26,415
But my granddaughter can't,
so pick.
36
00:01:28,785 --> 00:01:31,684
? ?
37
00:01:49,806 --> 00:01:51,242
(coos)
38
00:02:00,151 --> 00:02:02,417
-Hey, I was thinking...
-Oh, boy.
39
00:02:02,519 --> 00:02:05,288
Hear me out. I know
Mr. McAllister always closed
40
00:02:05,390 --> 00:02:07,992
the week of Christmas,
but what if we stayed open?
41
00:02:08,094 --> 00:02:11,029
You want us
to work on Christmas?
42
00:02:11,030 --> 00:02:13,095
It's not crazy.
Think of all the Jewish people
43
00:02:13,096 --> 00:02:14,596
who might need tires.
44
00:02:14,698 --> 00:02:18,363
How many Jewish people do you
think are in Medford, Texas?
45
00:02:18,465 --> 00:02:19,972
I know there'd be a lot more
46
00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:21,470
if they could buy tires
during Christmas.
47
00:02:21,471 --> 00:02:24,676
No, not a chance.
I need some time off.
48
00:02:24,778 --> 00:02:26,277
Hear you loud and clear.
49
00:02:27,707 --> 00:02:29,980
Although, Fagenbacher's
gonna be closed,
50
00:02:30,082 --> 00:02:31,652
so we'd be
the only game in town.
51
00:02:31,653 --> 00:02:34,448
RUBEN: (sighs) Are you gonna
keep badgering me until I say yes?
52
00:02:34,449 --> 00:02:37,387
-Course not, I'll drop it.
-Thanks.
53
00:02:38,420 --> 00:02:40,225
It's just,
we're in so much debt.
54
00:02:41,089 --> 00:02:42,139
Come on, dude.
55
00:02:42,191 --> 00:02:43,688
I'm thinking about you.
56
00:02:43,791 --> 00:02:46,825
And all those Jewish people
with flat tires.
57
00:02:55,109 --> 00:02:57,638
Mm. You missed
a good sermon this morning.
58
00:02:57,740 --> 00:03:01,344
Pastor Jeff is always on fire
during the holidays.
59
00:03:01,345 --> 00:03:03,816
Remember that candlelight
service when his sleeve
60
00:03:03,817 --> 00:03:06,117
actually caught on fire?
61
00:03:06,219 --> 00:03:08,715
I know he almost died,
but that was funny.
62
00:03:09,822 --> 00:03:11,319
I need some money.
63
00:03:11,320 --> 00:03:13,221
Aren't you gonna say hi
to your brother?
64
00:03:13,222 --> 00:03:15,727
Hi. 40 bucks should do it.
65
00:03:15,829 --> 00:03:18,062
I am not giving you $40.
66
00:03:18,063 --> 00:03:19,558
But I have to buy
a new bathing suit.
67
00:03:19,559 --> 00:03:21,160
You have a perfectly good one.
68
00:03:21,262 --> 00:03:22,328
That's a one-piece.
69
00:03:22,430 --> 00:03:24,365
What's wrong with a one-piece?
70
00:03:24,467 --> 00:03:26,457
Everyone in California
wears bikinis.
71
00:03:26,537 --> 00:03:28,974
Well, everyone in California's
going to hell.
72
00:03:29,076 --> 00:03:31,210
That's why God
gave them earthquakes.
73
00:03:31,211 --> 00:03:34,809
-Oh, what's all this
about California? -(Mary sighs)
74
00:03:34,810 --> 00:03:38,748
I told Sheldon that we would
visit him for Christmas.
75
00:03:38,850 --> 00:03:40,077
-Oh.
-And...
76
00:03:40,179 --> 00:03:43,815
I was hoping that you and Mandy
and CeeCee might join us.
77
00:03:43,917 --> 00:03:47,490
Oh, that's real nice,
but I don't think we can.
78
00:03:47,592 --> 00:03:50,188
You don't have to be
around Sheldon the whole time.
79
00:03:50,290 --> 00:03:52,556
That ain't why.
80
00:03:52,658 --> 00:03:54,828
I mean, it ain't ain't why.
81
00:03:54,930 --> 00:03:59,101
Well, I bet CeeCee would love
to go on one of those buses
82
00:03:59,203 --> 00:04:00,771
and see where the stars live.
83
00:04:00,873 --> 00:04:02,172
She's two years old.
84
00:04:02,274 --> 00:04:05,539
Well, maybe Barney's
on that tour.
85
00:04:05,642 --> 00:04:08,338
Look, I just can't take
the time off of work.
86
00:04:08,440 --> 00:04:10,045
I understand.
87
00:04:10,147 --> 00:04:12,614
I knew it was a long shot.
88
00:04:12,615 --> 00:04:14,782
You'll still have a good time.
89
00:04:14,783 --> 00:04:16,719
You'll get to meet
all of Sheldon's friends.
90
00:04:16,720 --> 00:04:19,390
Oh, that's so sweet,
you think Sheldon has friends.
91
00:04:25,965 --> 00:04:27,930
-Jim?
-JIM: In here.
92
00:04:28,032 --> 00:04:29,367
What are you doing?
93
00:04:29,469 --> 00:04:32,033
Taking a bubble bath.
What do you think I'm doing?
94
00:04:32,034 --> 00:04:34,767
Well, hurry up,
I've got something to tell you.
95
00:04:34,768 --> 00:04:37,170
JIM:
(stammers) All right, hold on.
96
00:04:37,272 --> 00:04:39,410
(toilet flushing)
97
00:04:42,716 --> 00:04:45,017
(faucet running)
98
00:04:45,119 --> 00:04:46,929
-(faucet turns off)
-(door opens)
99
00:04:46,930 --> 00:04:48,647
What?
100
00:04:48,648 --> 00:04:50,286
Mary's going to visit Sheldon.
101
00:04:50,388 --> 00:04:52,189
We've got CeeCee
all to ourselves.
102
00:04:52,291 --> 00:04:55,356
You interrupted
my business for that?
103
00:04:55,458 --> 00:04:57,557
-Sorry, I was just excited.
-Oh...
104
00:04:57,659 --> 00:04:59,556
You're right, honey,
it is exciting.
105
00:04:59,658 --> 00:05:01,463
Now, if you'll excuse me.
106
00:05:01,566 --> 00:05:03,830
Why don't we ever go away
for the holidays?
107
00:05:05,304 --> 00:05:07,174
It's one of life's
little mysteries.
108
00:05:07,939 --> 00:05:09,567
We're retired.
109
00:05:09,669 --> 00:05:12,144
We've got more money than Mary.
110
00:05:12,246 --> 00:05:14,341
Why does she get to go away
on vacation
111
00:05:14,444 --> 00:05:16,914
when we're stuck
sitting at home?
112
00:05:17,016 --> 00:05:19,811
You were just so happy.
113
00:05:19,914 --> 00:05:22,815
And you were just on the toilet.
Things change.
114
00:05:22,917 --> 00:05:25,857
Why don't we take
the whole family to the beach?
115
00:05:25,959 --> 00:05:27,258
Stay at a fancy hotel.
116
00:05:27,360 --> 00:05:29,553
It could be our Christmas gift
to everyone.
117
00:05:29,655 --> 00:05:31,858
Let me think about it.
118
00:05:33,230 --> 00:05:35,598
There's Fort Lauderdale.
119
00:05:36,497 --> 00:05:37,595
Oh, we could do Miami.
120
00:05:37,697 --> 00:05:39,866
JIM:
I'm thinking! Go away.
121
00:05:41,321 --> 00:05:46,573
So, we really want to be careful
about not going overboard
122
00:05:46,574 --> 00:05:47,840
with gifts for CeeCee this year.
123
00:05:47,841 --> 00:05:49,542
We don't want her
getting spoiled.
124
00:05:49,543 --> 00:05:51,946
-Like Mandy?
-Hey.
125
00:05:52,049 --> 00:05:53,484
But yeah.
126
00:05:54,382 --> 00:05:56,650
Well, actually...
127
00:05:56,753 --> 00:05:59,619
we wanted to talk to y'all
about your gifts.
128
00:05:59,721 --> 00:06:01,992
Aw, you don't have to
get us anything.
129
00:06:02,094 --> 00:06:03,494
That doesn't apply to you.
130
00:06:03,495 --> 00:06:06,566
You said we didn't need
to do gifts this year.
131
00:06:06,567 --> 00:06:08,330
Yeah, I say it, but you love me
so much, you do it anyway.
132
00:06:08,331 --> 00:06:09,632
That's how this works.
133
00:06:10,432 --> 00:06:11,965
-Tell them, Jim.
-(sighs)
134
00:06:12,067 --> 00:06:15,600
Your mother and I are taking
you all to Miami for Christmas.
135
00:06:15,702 --> 00:06:17,640
To a resort right on the beach!
136
00:06:19,639 --> 00:06:21,642
-That's so nice.
-Wow.
137
00:06:21,745 --> 00:06:24,647
-But we always
have Christmas here. -Jim?
138
00:06:25,848 --> 00:06:28,616
I've been informed
that this will be better.
139
00:06:28,718 --> 00:06:30,948
Don't you want to try
something different?
140
00:06:30,989 --> 00:06:32,388
Different?
141
00:06:32,490 --> 00:06:34,321
It's like you
don't even know me.
142
00:06:34,423 --> 00:06:36,858
You two want to go, right?
143
00:06:36,960 --> 00:06:39,910
Actually, I was gonna keep
the store open for the holidays.
144
00:06:39,911 --> 00:06:42,332
Yeah, and I need to be available
to fill in at the station.
145
00:06:42,333 --> 00:06:44,368
What is wrong with you people?
146
00:06:44,470 --> 00:06:46,799
We're trying to take you
on a free vacation.
147
00:06:46,901 --> 00:06:50,107
(scoffs) Yeah, free for them,
not for me.
148
00:06:50,108 --> 00:06:53,475
Seems like you're the only one
that really wants to go, Mom.
149
00:06:53,476 --> 00:06:56,308
(scoffs) That is not true. Jim?
150
00:06:56,410 --> 00:06:58,076
Oh, come on!
151
00:07:05,124 --> 00:07:06,684
Are we being selfish?
152
00:07:06,786 --> 00:07:08,592
'Cause we'd rather make money
153
00:07:08,694 --> 00:07:11,324
than sit on a beach and
drink booze out of a coconut?
154
00:07:11,426 --> 00:07:13,564
I don't think so.
155
00:07:13,666 --> 00:07:16,868
Well, I got to tell you,
I'm having second thoughts.
156
00:07:16,970 --> 00:07:18,734
-Seriously?
-Yeah.
157
00:07:18,735 --> 00:07:21,005
I mean, the station's
probably not gonna call me in.
158
00:07:21,006 --> 00:07:22,133
We should go.
159
00:07:22,235 --> 00:07:25,306
Besides, I think I'd like to see
my husband on a beach
160
00:07:25,408 --> 00:07:26,488
in a bathing suit and-
161
00:07:26,577 --> 00:07:28,579
I'm praying to God-
not cowboy boots.
162
00:07:29,978 --> 00:07:33,181
(scoffs) I wouldn't wear
my boots on the beach.
163
00:07:33,283 --> 00:07:34,585
Maybe by the pool.
164
00:07:34,586 --> 00:07:37,616
Well, just think about
how cute CeeCee would be
165
00:07:37,617 --> 00:07:38,786
playing in the sand.
166
00:07:38,787 --> 00:07:40,790
How's that different
than playing in a sandbox?
167
00:07:40,791 --> 00:07:42,961
Uh, 'cause I'll be next to her
getting a tan.
168
00:07:44,092 --> 00:07:46,661
Come on, you work all week,
I work on the weekends.
169
00:07:46,763 --> 00:07:49,468
We never really get
any real family time.
170
00:07:51,900 --> 00:07:54,869
-You know what? Let's do it.
-(gasps) Yay.
171
00:07:56,740 --> 00:07:59,076
Ooh, I'm gonna have to get
a bikini wax.
172
00:07:59,178 --> 00:08:01,246
Maybe I should get one.
173
00:08:01,348 --> 00:08:04,483
Oh, sweetheart,
you'd cry like a baby.
174
00:08:09,321 --> 00:08:11,884
Come on, Ruben, don't be mad.
175
00:08:11,885 --> 00:08:14,053
I cancelled my plans
'cause you convinced me
176
00:08:14,054 --> 00:08:16,158
it was a good idea
to keep the store open.
177
00:08:16,260 --> 00:08:17,656
It is a good idea.
178
00:08:17,758 --> 00:08:20,195
I just won't be here for it.
179
00:08:20,196 --> 00:08:23,130
So I'm supposed to work
while you go on vacation?
180
00:08:23,131 --> 00:08:25,541
How about this, how about
I just make it up to you
181
00:08:25,542 --> 00:08:26,964
and I'll work
on the next holiday?
182
00:08:26,965 --> 00:08:29,373
So what, like Valentine's Day?
183
00:08:29,475 --> 00:08:31,571
No, Valentine's Day
ain't gonna work.
184
00:08:32,240 --> 00:08:35,608
Maybe I'll just close the store,
join my family in Mexico.
185
00:08:35,710 --> 00:08:37,282
I thought you were Puerto Rican.
186
00:08:37,384 --> 00:08:40,912
I am. They're vacationing
in Mexico.
187
00:08:41,014 --> 00:08:43,049
You can see why
that was confusing.
188
00:08:44,675 --> 00:08:48,754
So, I know I said
I was gonna be available
189
00:08:48,755 --> 00:08:50,227
to fill in, but my plans
190
00:08:50,329 --> 00:08:51,860
changed, and I'm gonna be...
191
00:08:53,065 --> 00:08:55,261
Oh, she is?
192
00:08:55,363 --> 00:08:57,129
Oh, no.
193
00:08:58,833 --> 00:09:01,572
Well, h-how long
would you need me?
194
00:09:01,674 --> 00:09:04,540
Oh, boy, you know, I just,
I made so many promises
195
00:09:04,642 --> 00:09:06,270
to so many-
Let me call you back.
196
00:09:10,050 --> 00:09:12,246
(applause over TV)
197
00:09:12,348 --> 00:09:13,684
Hey, Daddy.
198
00:09:14,548 --> 00:09:15,614
What's up?
199
00:09:15,716 --> 00:09:16,783
Well, I was just, uh,
200
00:09:16,784 --> 00:09:18,520
I was thinking about,
uh, the trip,
201
00:09:18,521 --> 00:09:20,154
and how excited I am.
202
00:09:20,256 --> 00:09:21,824
Uh-huh.
203
00:09:21,825 --> 00:09:25,324
You know, speaking
of exciting things,
204
00:09:25,325 --> 00:09:27,661
the station called,
and the weeknight weather girl
205
00:09:27,662 --> 00:09:28,964
got lice from her kid.
206
00:09:29,066 --> 00:09:30,668
Ugh.
207
00:09:30,770 --> 00:09:33,360
Yeah, it's a bad case.
They may have to shave her head.
208
00:09:33,361 --> 00:09:35,837
Are you trying to say
you're not coming to Miami?
209
00:09:35,838 --> 00:09:37,708
No, no, no, of course not.
I was just
210
00:09:37,810 --> 00:09:41,445
wondering if maybe we could
leave two days later.
211
00:09:41,446 --> 00:09:43,141
-Everything's already booked.
-Yeah,
212
00:09:43,142 --> 00:09:44,782
I know, I know,
and I wouldn't ask,
213
00:09:44,783 --> 00:09:48,318
but this is really important
to my career, and...
214
00:09:48,420 --> 00:09:50,551
this could be your gift to me.
215
00:09:50,653 --> 00:09:54,120
The trip is my gift to you.
216
00:09:55,161 --> 00:09:56,655
No, no, your trip
217
00:09:56,757 --> 00:09:58,462
is the gift for everybody.
218
00:09:58,564 --> 00:10:01,732
This could be
your special gift to me.
219
00:10:02,800 --> 00:10:04,996
Do you understand
how expensive it'll be
220
00:10:04,997 --> 00:10:06,936
to rebook everything
on Christmas?
221
00:10:06,937 --> 00:10:09,740
Yes, I know, that's why
it would be so special.
222
00:10:13,931 --> 00:10:16,009
Hey.
223
00:10:16,010 --> 00:10:19,316
Hey. Um, did you talk
to Ruben yet?
224
00:10:19,418 --> 00:10:21,319
Yep. He wasn't happy about it,
225
00:10:21,320 --> 00:10:22,485
but I let him know
it's Christmas,
226
00:10:22,486 --> 00:10:23,822
and my family comes first.
227
00:10:23,924 --> 00:10:25,452
Great.
228
00:10:25,554 --> 00:10:27,856
So, uh, hey, listen,
229
00:10:27,958 --> 00:10:31,224
how would you feel
about leaving two days later?
230
00:10:31,326 --> 00:10:35,566
-Why?
-So, uh, I can go to work and make us some money.
231
00:10:35,668 --> 00:10:38,230
But I was gonna work
and make us some money.
232
00:10:38,332 --> 00:10:40,802
Aw, well, now, you don't
have to. Merry Christmas.
233
00:10:41,670 --> 00:10:43,401
Mandy, what is going on?
234
00:10:43,503 --> 00:10:47,578
Okay, um, the station called,
and they need me to fill in.
235
00:10:47,579 --> 00:10:49,781
You were the one yapping
about family time.
236
00:10:49,782 --> 00:10:52,382
No, I know, but i-if I do
the weeknight weather,
237
00:10:52,383 --> 00:10:53,816
the next step is weekend anchor,
238
00:10:53,817 --> 00:10:55,346
which puts me
in spitting distance
239
00:10:55,347 --> 00:10:57,186
of weeknight anchor,
and that's basically
240
00:10:57,187 --> 00:11:00,418
how Oprah got started, and don't
you want your wife to be Oprah?
241
00:11:00,520 --> 00:11:03,728
What about me? Don't you want me
to be the Oprah of tires?
242
00:11:04,593 --> 00:11:06,060
That makes no sense.
243
00:11:06,162 --> 00:11:09,063
Well, there ain't no famous
tire guy to compare to.
244
00:11:10,296 --> 00:11:12,632
All right, fine,
if you want me to give up
245
00:11:12,734 --> 00:11:14,232
on this huge opportunity
246
00:11:14,334 --> 00:11:16,936
for two extra days
of family time, then I'll do it.
247
00:11:17,038 --> 00:11:19,271
-Great.
-(scoffs) I'm not doing it.
248
00:11:22,115 --> 00:11:23,165
Michelin Man.
249
00:11:23,242 --> 00:11:25,211
I could be the next
Michelin Man!
250
00:11:33,725 --> 00:11:35,415
I can't believe
you gave in to her.
251
00:11:36,427 --> 00:11:37,891
This is so like you.
252
00:11:37,993 --> 00:11:40,627
Then it shouldn't be
hard to believe.
253
00:11:41,263 --> 00:11:44,131
And how much money did it cost
to change those tickets?
254
00:11:44,132 --> 00:11:46,769
Oh, it's Christmas, Audrey.
It's not about the money.
255
00:11:46,770 --> 00:11:49,636
-So, a lot.
-A shocking amount.
256
00:11:50,272 --> 00:11:54,108
I can't even remember why
we wanted to do this.
257
00:11:55,113 --> 00:11:56,242
We?
258
00:11:57,847 --> 00:11:59,945
There's no "we,"
this is all you.
259
00:12:00,047 --> 00:12:02,114
Don't you raise
your voice at me.
260
00:12:02,216 --> 00:12:04,987
I was on the toilet
minding my own business.
261
00:12:06,491 --> 00:12:09,591
Excuse me, when you fight,
262
00:12:09,693 --> 00:12:12,258
it's the children who suffer.
263
00:12:13,430 --> 00:12:14,997
Remember that.
264
00:12:20,536 --> 00:12:23,804
(phone rings)
265
00:12:24,440 --> 00:12:27,708
McAllister Auto. We never tire
of taking care of your tires.
266
00:12:27,810 --> 00:12:30,373
Your sister is driving me crazy.
267
00:12:30,475 --> 00:12:33,443
Something she never tires of,
am I right?
268
00:12:33,545 --> 00:12:37,883
Not in the mood, Georgie.
I am at my wit's end.
269
00:12:37,985 --> 00:12:39,421
-So am I.
-MARY: Missy,
270
00:12:39,523 --> 00:12:40,718
get off the phone.
271
00:12:40,820 --> 00:12:43,355
Okay. Click.
272
00:12:43,457 --> 00:12:46,560
I know you just made
the click noise with your mouth.
273
00:12:46,662 --> 00:12:48,162
What is going on?
274
00:12:48,264 --> 00:12:50,995
(sighs) Can your sister
stay with you for Christmas?
275
00:12:51,097 --> 00:12:52,900
What happened to California?
276
00:12:52,901 --> 00:12:54,705
She wants me
to spend the whole week
277
00:12:54,706 --> 00:12:57,136
in some hellhole
called Pasadena.
278
00:12:57,238 --> 00:13:00,069
Sheldon is excited
to show us his school.
279
00:13:00,171 --> 00:13:01,707
It's nowhere near a beach.
280
00:13:01,809 --> 00:13:03,446
(sighs) So can she?
281
00:13:03,548 --> 00:13:06,376
I wish she could, but...
282
00:13:06,478 --> 00:13:08,528
I'm going to Miami
with the McAllisters.
283
00:13:08,529 --> 00:13:09,586
MARY:
Really?
284
00:13:09,587 --> 00:13:11,149
Because when I asked you
285
00:13:11,150 --> 00:13:12,622
if you wanted to come
to California,
286
00:13:12,623 --> 00:13:13,817
you said you had to work.
287
00:13:13,919 --> 00:13:16,525
Um... Click.
288
00:13:16,627 --> 00:13:18,157
George Marshall Cooper.
289
00:13:18,259 --> 00:13:21,192
I didn't plan it.
It was their gift to us.
290
00:13:21,294 --> 00:13:23,104
They're paying
for the whole thing.
291
00:13:23,130 --> 00:13:25,363
Oh, well,
because they have money,
292
00:13:25,465 --> 00:13:28,115
they get to spend Christmas
with my granddaughter?
293
00:13:28,116 --> 00:13:30,776
Wait, you're going to the beach?
Take me with you, please.
294
00:13:30,777 --> 00:13:34,070
I'm sorry, it's not my place
to invite you.
295
00:13:34,172 --> 00:13:35,432
Well, there you go, Missy.
296
00:13:35,508 --> 00:13:38,647
Your brother picked
his rich new family over us.
297
00:13:38,749 --> 00:13:40,418
That ain't what's happening.
298
00:13:40,520 --> 00:13:42,986
It's just, ever since Dad died,
299
00:13:42,987 --> 00:13:44,784
I've been having such
a hard time, and the holidays...
300
00:13:44,785 --> 00:13:46,286
Cut that out.
301
00:13:47,527 --> 00:13:48,858
It's so hard to be an orphan.
302
00:13:48,960 --> 00:13:51,555
You are not an orphan.
I am still alive!
303
00:13:53,777 --> 00:13:58,571
MANDY (over TV):
So, it looks like that storm front
304
00:13:58,572 --> 00:13:59,630
is gonna move off to the west,
305
00:13:59,631 --> 00:14:03,067
leaving us with
an unseasonably warm Christmas.
306
00:14:03,169 --> 00:14:05,041
So, instead of milk and cookies,
307
00:14:05,143 --> 00:14:08,242
maybe leave Santa
some sunscreen and a Speedo.
308
00:14:09,449 --> 00:14:10,740
And before I sign off,
309
00:14:10,842 --> 00:14:14,345
I just want to wish everyone
a safe and happy holiday.
310
00:14:14,447 --> 00:14:17,053
If only she were that nice
in real life.
311
00:14:19,589 --> 00:14:20,639
Hey, y'all.
312
00:14:20,691 --> 00:14:22,990
You just missed Amanda.
313
00:14:23,092 --> 00:14:25,290
Let me guess,
gonna be sunny and warm?
314
00:14:25,392 --> 00:14:29,398
Outside. In here,
it's been a bit chilly.
315
00:14:29,500 --> 00:14:31,235
Oh, stop it.
316
00:14:31,337 --> 00:14:32,930
And cranky.
317
00:14:33,032 --> 00:14:35,634
(laughs awkwardly)
318
00:14:35,737 --> 00:14:37,807
Anyways...
319
00:14:37,808 --> 00:14:40,338
I was wondering if I could ask
a huge favor about the trip.
320
00:14:40,339 --> 00:14:42,746
Uh-uh. I'm not
changing it again.
321
00:14:42,848 --> 00:14:44,946
No changes,
it's just my sister's
322
00:14:45,048 --> 00:14:47,015
being a real
pain in the ass to my mom,
323
00:14:47,117 --> 00:14:49,317
and I thought maybe
she could go with us.
324
00:14:49,419 --> 00:14:53,590
You want to bring an angry
teenage girl on our family trip?
325
00:14:53,692 --> 00:14:55,619
Sounds like she'll fit right in.
326
00:14:56,727 --> 00:14:59,192
She's only rude to my mom.
327
00:14:59,295 --> 00:15:02,194
She's actually really sweet
and responsible.
328
00:15:02,296 --> 00:15:05,095
Well, then maybe
she can babysit CeeCee
329
00:15:05,197 --> 00:15:06,463
when we go out to dinner.
330
00:15:06,566 --> 00:15:08,916
Oh, I ain't leaving my daughter
alone with her.
331
00:15:10,308 --> 00:15:13,438
("It's the Most Wonderful Time
of the Year" by Andy Williams)
332
00:15:16,280 --> 00:15:20,749
? It's the most wonderful time
of the year... ?
333
00:15:20,851 --> 00:15:22,346
We're gonna miss our flight.
334
00:15:22,448 --> 00:15:24,788
I told you we should've
left earlier.
335
00:15:24,789 --> 00:15:26,284
We should've left
two days earlier.
336
00:15:26,285 --> 00:15:28,455
Oh, so the traffic is my fault?
337
00:15:28,456 --> 00:15:30,789
We'd already be on the beach
if it wasn't for your career.
338
00:15:30,790 --> 00:15:33,390
Well, someone has to pay off
all the debt you put us in.
339
00:15:33,391 --> 00:15:34,798
So is the hotel on the beach,
340
00:15:34,799 --> 00:15:36,360
near the beach,
what are we talking?
341
00:15:36,361 --> 00:15:38,665
-Right on the beach.
-Sweet.
342
00:15:38,767 --> 00:15:40,202
If we get there.
343
00:15:40,203 --> 00:15:43,609
That debt is 'cause I'm building
a future for our family.
344
00:15:43,610 --> 00:15:44,902
What do you think I'm doing?
345
00:15:44,903 --> 00:15:47,704
Can you keep it down? I can't
hear the Christmas music.
346
00:15:47,806 --> 00:15:50,608
It's the most wonderful time
of the year. You happy?
347
00:15:51,917 --> 00:15:54,484
So what's the drinking age
in Florida?
348
00:15:54,586 --> 00:15:55,636
You're not drinking.
349
00:15:55,653 --> 00:15:57,747
Well, I am, a lot.
350
00:15:57,849 --> 00:16:00,739
At least that Christmas
tradition isn't getting ruined.
351
00:16:01,726 --> 00:16:03,720
All right, that is enough.
352
00:16:03,822 --> 00:16:06,490
We paid a lot of money
to take you on a wonderful trip,
353
00:16:06,592 --> 00:16:08,702
so we're gonna stop
our bitching and have
354
00:16:08,703 --> 00:16:11,296
a magical family Christmas
we'll remember forever.
355
00:16:11,297 --> 00:16:13,631
Now, shut up and be grateful!
356
00:16:14,671 --> 00:16:16,374
I'm grateful.
357
00:16:16,476 --> 00:16:18,034
Thank you, Missy.
358
00:16:18,136 --> 00:16:19,441
You are a doll.
359
00:16:19,543 --> 00:16:21,207
Thanks.
360
00:16:21,309 --> 00:16:23,210
I don't know why
my mom hates you.
361
00:16:23,312 --> 00:16:25,242
? It's the most
wonderful time... ?
362
00:16:25,344 --> 00:16:28,215
(rain pouring, thunder crashing)
363
00:16:28,317 --> 00:16:30,651
You said the storm front
was heading west.
364
00:16:30,753 --> 00:16:33,084
Aw, you watched.
365
00:16:33,186 --> 00:16:35,585
My hair is gonna frizz.
366
00:16:35,687 --> 00:16:38,190
Maybe we should make
a run for the hotel.
367
00:16:38,292 --> 00:16:40,260
-It'll pass.
-(thunder crashes)
368
00:16:40,362 --> 00:16:43,529
Still better than Christmas
with Sheldon.
369
00:16:50,569 --> 00:16:52,803
(playing "The Twelve Days
of Christmas")
370
00:16:52,905 --> 00:16:57,174
? On the worst day of Christmas
my parents gave to me ?
371
00:16:57,276 --> 00:17:00,750
? A trip to Miami ?
372
00:17:00,852 --> 00:17:03,347
? We all sat in traffic ?
373
00:17:03,449 --> 00:17:05,117
? The plane ran out of peanuts ?
374
00:17:05,220 --> 00:17:07,154
? They lost Mom's luggage ?
375
00:17:07,256 --> 00:17:09,286
? Didn't check in
till midnight ?
376
00:17:09,389 --> 00:17:11,024
? Then it started raining ?
377
00:17:11,025 --> 00:17:12,226
? Dad ran in flip-flops ?
378
00:17:12,227 --> 00:17:13,825
? He fell and it was funny ?
379
00:17:13,927 --> 00:17:15,027
(laughs)
380
00:17:15,129 --> 00:17:16,963
? The hotel bar ?
381
00:17:17,065 --> 00:17:19,499
? Served Missy liquor ?
382
00:17:21,071 --> 00:17:22,706
? She threw up in the bushes ?
383
00:17:22,808 --> 00:17:24,008
? Georgie caught a cold ?
384
00:17:24,072 --> 00:17:25,571
? Mandy got lice ?
385
00:17:25,673 --> 00:17:30,180
? But I got to watch you,
which was nice. ?
386
00:17:35,949 --> 00:17:39,183
NARRATOR:
Back in Medford, Ruben said, "Screw this."
387
00:17:39,285 --> 00:17:41,157
He closed the store
388
00:17:41,259 --> 00:17:44,793
and joined his
Puerto Rican family in Mexico.
389
00:17:44,895 --> 00:17:46,624
Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.
390
00:17:46,726 --> 00:17:50,794
Merry Christmas, y'all.
Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho!
391
00:17:52,700 --> 00:18:00,745
Captioning sponsored
by CBS
392
00:18:00,746 --> 00:18:03,626
WARNER BROS.
TELEVISION
393
00:18:03,714 --> 00:18:06,580
and TOYOTA.
394
00:18:06,581 --> 00:18:09,730
Captioned by Media
Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org
395
00:18:09,731 --> 00:18:14,281
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
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