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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,166 --> 00:00:04,792 Okay, Big Lou has called the meeting to order. 2 00:00:04,959 --> 00:00:06,041 Thank you, my friend. 3 00:00:06,208 --> 00:00:07,375 Mmm. 4 00:00:07,917 --> 00:00:10,041 Okay, we need to talk about our vacation to the Bahamas. 5 00:00:10,166 --> 00:00:12,583 Can we talk about how we all spend every second together 6 00:00:12,667 --> 00:00:14,542 so it's insane for us to also travel together? 7 00:00:14,750 --> 00:00:17,709 All in favour of Grayson not being able to speak any more? 8 00:00:18,917 --> 00:00:19,959 Ah, it passes. 9 00:00:20,083 --> 00:00:21,417 - Yeah. But... - Zip it. 10 00:00:21,750 --> 00:00:22,875 Okay, we're leaving in three days. 11 00:00:23,000 --> 00:00:24,792 We need to decide whether we're gonna invite Tom. 12 00:00:24,875 --> 00:00:25,917 Please, oh, please. 13 00:00:26,000 --> 00:00:29,000 - He is part of the gang now. - On the other hand, he's Tom. 14 00:00:29,542 --> 00:00:32,667 With the combo of our booze intake and our general poor judgement, 15 00:00:32,750 --> 00:00:34,667 I think having a doctor around's a pro. 16 00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:38,208 True. Uh, but, warning, I am horrible at small talk. 17 00:00:38,291 --> 00:00:40,125 You do not wanna sit next to me on the beach. 18 00:00:40,250 --> 00:00:42,083 Sweetie, I'd let other people do the cons. 19 00:00:42,417 --> 00:00:43,542 Pro, he's eager to please, 20 00:00:43,625 --> 00:00:45,667 so you know he'll wake up early and get pool chairs. 21 00:00:45,917 --> 00:00:47,959 Con, he's Tom. 22 00:00:48,125 --> 00:00:50,834 I know I already said this, but I think it's worth mentioning twice. 23 00:00:51,375 --> 00:00:52,917 I've always wanted to go to the Bahamas. 24 00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:54,291 You know, interestingly, for years, 25 00:00:54,375 --> 00:00:56,625 the country's principal industry was ship-salvaging. 26 00:00:57,000 --> 00:00:59,417 That is some god-awful small talk. 27 00:00:59,917 --> 00:01:02,917 See? There I go. I gotta say, it's a toss-up. 28 00:01:03,208 --> 00:01:04,291 Yeah. Yeah. 29 00:01:05,875 --> 00:01:08,208 - Not to me. Welcome aboard, buddy. - Yeah! 30 00:01:08,291 --> 00:01:09,583 Ha! 31 00:01:09,667 --> 00:01:10,709 Cheers. 32 00:01:19,083 --> 00:01:21,125 Nice shoes. Did you make them? 33 00:01:23,041 --> 00:01:25,583 {\an8}Sit down, have some coffee. Then be horrible. 34 00:01:25,667 --> 00:01:26,750 {\an8}All right. 35 00:01:26,834 --> 00:01:28,542 {\an8}Dad, we don't need you to stay over, 36 00:01:28,625 --> 00:01:30,542 {\an8}we just need you to water the plants while we're gone. 37 00:01:30,667 --> 00:01:32,375 {\an8}Yeah, but I want to stay. 38 00:01:32,458 --> 00:01:36,417 {\an8}This weekend, Gulfhaven is hosting a Clint Eastwood movie marathon 39 00:01:36,750 --> 00:01:38,000 {\an8}and a soup festival. 40 00:01:38,667 --> 00:01:40,542 {\an8}There's gonna be old people everywhere. 41 00:01:40,709 --> 00:01:43,041 {\an8}Aw, so you'll be trolling for some old ladies, aren't you, Daddy? 42 00:01:44,083 --> 00:01:46,417 {\an8}I hope I get some rest on this vacation. 43 00:01:46,500 --> 00:01:48,333 {\an8}Lately I've been sleeping like a baby. 44 00:01:48,417 --> 00:01:49,542 {\an8}Oh, you poor thing. 45 00:01:49,959 --> 00:01:51,625 {\an8}Hmm, but "sleeping like a baby" is a good thing. 46 00:01:51,959 --> 00:01:54,959 {\an8}Babies wake up every 10 minutes, hungry and screaming. 47 00:01:55,041 --> 00:01:56,166 {\an8}That is not restful. 48 00:01:56,333 --> 00:01:57,750 {\an8}No, no, no, no. Don't do that thing 49 00:01:57,834 --> 00:02:00,250 {\an8}where you take a well-established saying and then change it to... 50 00:02:01,375 --> 00:02:03,000 - Where's Ellie? - Change approved! 51 00:02:11,208 --> 00:02:14,208 {\an8}- What are we looking at? - I wish you had a TV in here. 52 00:02:14,375 --> 00:02:15,875 {\an8}This is awkward. 53 00:02:16,125 --> 00:02:19,834 {\an8}Yeah. Yeah, this is what awkward is. 54 00:02:20,417 --> 00:02:23,417 {\an8}What's the big deal? We've hung out on my bed a million times. 55 00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:27,375 {\an8}Well, now that we both said that we liked each other, 56 00:02:27,458 --> 00:02:28,959 {\an8}I mean, it's out there. 57 00:02:29,458 --> 00:02:31,250 {\an8}This is practically our first date. 58 00:02:32,041 --> 00:02:33,834 {\an8}God. Why am I so nervous? 59 00:02:34,125 --> 00:02:35,583 {\an8}You know, maybe we should just 60 00:02:35,667 --> 00:02:37,750 {\an8}watch a movie and hang out like we normally do. 61 00:02:38,291 --> 00:02:39,458 {\an8}- Good call. - Thank God! 62 00:02:40,458 --> 00:02:41,792 {\an8}Hey, and for the record, 63 00:02:42,125 --> 00:02:44,834 {\an8}I wore underwear tonight so you'd think I was classy. 64 00:02:45,291 --> 00:02:46,375 {\an8}No, you didn't. 65 00:02:46,500 --> 00:02:49,166 {\an8}I didn't. Turns out, I don't actually own any. 66 00:02:52,875 --> 00:02:55,792 {\an8}It's hard to walk around holding a bunch of cakes, 67 00:02:55,875 --> 00:02:59,458 {\an8}so we decided that a "cake walk" is something that's hard to do. 68 00:03:00,000 --> 00:03:02,667 {\an8}Someone in a funk, they need to be "slapped out of it." 69 00:03:03,041 --> 00:03:06,959 {\an8}And since "slim chance" means that it probably won't happen, 70 00:03:07,041 --> 00:03:09,375 {\an8}"fat chance" means that it definitely will. 71 00:03:09,667 --> 00:03:12,917 {\an8}Oh, and also, you know how getting your ass kicked always sucks? 72 00:03:13,000 --> 00:03:16,000 {\an8}Well, anything that's really terrible, "kicks ass." 73 00:03:16,333 --> 00:03:18,375 - That makes sense. - It doesn't. 74 00:03:18,959 --> 00:03:20,625 Hey, Dad. This is our new neighbour, Anne. 75 00:03:20,917 --> 00:03:22,709 - Oh, hello. - Hello back. 76 00:03:22,959 --> 00:03:25,750 Aren't you lovely? I'm actually staying here all week... 77 00:03:25,875 --> 00:03:28,125 - Dad, she's married. - I'm having a nap. 78 00:03:28,583 --> 00:03:29,959 Oh. 79 00:03:30,041 --> 00:03:33,250 I need to go, too. I have to pick up a case of whisky. 80 00:03:33,542 --> 00:03:35,583 Aw, yeah! My girl can party! 81 00:03:35,667 --> 00:03:38,041 - No. It's for a funeral. - I feel terrible. 82 00:03:38,125 --> 00:03:40,500 It's my good friend. Colon cancer got him. 83 00:03:41,041 --> 00:03:42,250 Oh, I'm so sorry. 84 00:03:42,792 --> 00:03:44,083 - That kicks ass. - Stop. 85 00:03:44,166 --> 00:03:45,208 Thank you. 86 00:03:45,291 --> 00:03:49,041 The sad part is, had he gone to his doctor for regular check-ups, 87 00:03:49,125 --> 00:03:52,166 they could have caught it. Bye. 88 00:03:52,333 --> 00:03:53,959 Bye. 89 00:03:54,709 --> 00:03:57,250 What, are you sad because of Anne's friend? 90 00:03:57,333 --> 00:03:58,709 No, dummy. 91 00:03:59,083 --> 00:04:01,500 She's sad because, in the last two seconds, 92 00:04:01,583 --> 00:04:04,125 she's decided her dad's gonna die of some terrible disease. 93 00:04:04,208 --> 00:04:05,333 Right, sweetie? 94 00:04:05,458 --> 00:04:06,959 There's just so much I should've told him. 95 00:04:07,041 --> 00:04:08,250 I know. 96 00:04:08,333 --> 00:04:11,166 I'd be so much of a better husband than you. 97 00:04:11,250 --> 00:04:12,834 You're lucky you have a penis. 98 00:04:12,917 --> 00:04:14,875 Yeah, they're pretty cool. 99 00:04:19,875 --> 00:04:21,083 {\an8}What're you doing? 100 00:04:21,208 --> 00:04:23,375 {\an8}I'm on AutoTrader.com. 101 00:04:23,625 --> 00:04:25,583 You know, they got a lot of great deals on new cars. 102 00:04:26,667 --> 00:04:29,083 - Do you have any money? - I do not. 103 00:04:29,917 --> 00:04:32,709 You know, I wish they had a HalfEatenSandwichTrader.com. 104 00:04:32,834 --> 00:04:36,709 I've got a slightly-used BLT and I'd love to get into a Monte Cristo. 105 00:04:37,750 --> 00:04:39,542 Why do you want a car? What's wrong with your golf cart? 106 00:04:40,166 --> 00:04:42,166 Eh. You know, it's a little too small for certain things. 107 00:04:43,208 --> 00:04:45,333 I can't feel my legs. How much further to the... 108 00:04:45,417 --> 00:04:46,458 No, no, no. 109 00:04:46,542 --> 00:04:50,250 Dog Travis will bolt if he hears that we're heading to the K-E-N-E-L. 110 00:04:50,333 --> 00:04:51,750 I think you're giving him too much credit. 111 00:04:51,834 --> 00:04:53,375 Ah, this dog's a genius, bud. 112 00:04:56,959 --> 00:04:58,417 They spelled "kennel" wrong. 113 00:05:01,458 --> 00:05:02,500 Ah! 114 00:05:02,709 --> 00:05:04,583 My fault for saying it. 115 00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:08,250 Hey. Got you a Bahama hat. 116 00:05:08,333 --> 00:05:10,667 Cool. Am I joining a boy band? 117 00:05:12,291 --> 00:05:14,500 Hee-hee! Whoo! 118 00:05:15,959 --> 00:05:17,625 Am I too pretty to be the tough one? 119 00:05:17,709 --> 00:05:20,458 I never know what the hell anyone's talking about around here. 120 00:05:21,208 --> 00:05:23,875 Why are y'all going to the Bahamas anyway? 121 00:05:24,083 --> 00:05:26,500 Nothing to do there but sit around and drink. 122 00:05:26,834 --> 00:05:28,792 Yeah. We'll try to make the best of it. 123 00:05:28,917 --> 00:05:31,875 I always dreamed about going to see Hollywood. 124 00:05:32,125 --> 00:05:33,542 Hollywood. 125 00:05:33,667 --> 00:05:35,792 Bunch of loser wannabe actors, 126 00:05:35,875 --> 00:05:38,500 sending out their lame homemade video reels 127 00:05:38,583 --> 00:05:40,375 to casting agents, 128 00:05:40,458 --> 00:05:43,834 who never even call them back. 129 00:05:44,250 --> 00:05:47,959 Dad, someone really close to Anne just recently passed away. 130 00:05:48,041 --> 00:05:49,250 - Her... - Not her husband. 131 00:05:49,333 --> 00:05:50,542 Thank God. 132 00:05:50,667 --> 00:05:52,792 I mean, how hard is it to make one phone call? 133 00:05:52,875 --> 00:05:54,500 "Look, your video reel's fine, okay? 134 00:05:54,583 --> 00:05:56,458 "But maybe concentrate on modelling for now." 135 00:05:56,583 --> 00:05:58,250 I will take that hat back so fast. 136 00:05:59,000 --> 00:06:00,625 Anyway, when is the last time 137 00:06:00,750 --> 00:06:02,125 that you went to the doctor and got checked out? 138 00:06:02,458 --> 00:06:05,667 Had to be about five years ago. 139 00:06:06,041 --> 00:06:07,458 Good night, Junebug. 140 00:06:07,875 --> 00:06:11,000 - Are you already in your crazy place? - Yeah. 141 00:06:11,208 --> 00:06:12,917 Is it something that wine could solve? 142 00:06:13,208 --> 00:06:15,208 Maybe if it's Big Lou. But hurry. 143 00:06:15,792 --> 00:06:17,750 Look, just think happy thoughts, okay? 144 00:06:17,834 --> 00:06:21,083 Like, me in my hat, or my boy band. 145 00:06:21,250 --> 00:06:22,834 Yeah, everything's gonna be okay. 146 00:06:22,959 --> 00:06:24,709 Ooh, that could be our first single. 147 00:06:24,792 --> 00:06:27,375 Everything's going to be okay, girl 148 00:06:35,875 --> 00:06:37,083 Girl 149 00:06:42,291 --> 00:06:44,041 You were taken too soon, Big Lou. 150 00:06:45,959 --> 00:06:47,333 I'll miss you. 151 00:06:48,250 --> 00:06:50,000 Should we pour some out for our homie? 152 00:06:50,083 --> 00:06:51,208 Hmm. 153 00:06:54,542 --> 00:06:57,375 - What the hell are they doing? - Wine glass funeral. 154 00:06:57,458 --> 00:06:58,709 Hmm. 155 00:06:58,792 --> 00:06:59,959 It's only weird the first time you see it. 156 00:07:00,041 --> 00:07:01,208 This is, like, my fourth one. 157 00:07:01,583 --> 00:07:04,208 Yeah. First time as a murderer. Mm-hmm. 158 00:07:05,125 --> 00:07:06,208 Oh! 159 00:07:06,291 --> 00:07:07,542 For Lou. 160 00:07:08,208 --> 00:07:09,250 For Lou. 161 00:07:10,166 --> 00:07:11,250 Oh! 162 00:07:11,333 --> 00:07:12,583 For Lou! 163 00:07:13,959 --> 00:07:15,583 You all had rings on! 164 00:07:16,291 --> 00:07:18,917 Promise me y'all will sock him like that when I die. 165 00:07:19,166 --> 00:07:20,250 Yeah, about that. 166 00:07:20,375 --> 00:07:22,125 You need to get a check-up, Dad. 167 00:07:22,250 --> 00:07:24,834 Why? All my parts are still working. 168 00:07:24,917 --> 00:07:27,542 I'm able to pee once every six or seven weeks. 169 00:07:28,792 --> 00:07:29,834 That's a joke. 170 00:07:30,625 --> 00:07:32,834 Honey, look, I'm an old man. 171 00:07:32,959 --> 00:07:36,542 If I go to the doctor, they're gonna find something wrong. 172 00:07:37,041 --> 00:07:38,667 Now, I'd just rather skip all of that. 173 00:07:38,750 --> 00:07:41,458 Keep on whistling past the graveyard. 174 00:07:41,542 --> 00:07:42,792 That sound good, Junebug? 175 00:07:43,166 --> 00:07:44,250 No. 176 00:07:52,583 --> 00:07:55,041 You tried. That's all you can do, right? 177 00:07:55,417 --> 00:07:58,041 We're gonna get him to the doctor before we leave 178 00:07:58,125 --> 00:08:00,208 or we're not going on a vacation. 179 00:08:02,417 --> 00:08:03,834 Fantastic. 180 00:08:10,291 --> 00:08:13,792 Hey, last night was your first date, wasn't it? 181 00:08:13,875 --> 00:08:16,709 How was your first time as luvahs? 182 00:08:17,125 --> 00:08:18,500 Please don't say it like that. 183 00:08:18,583 --> 00:08:20,458 Well, now I'm only gonna say it like that. 184 00:08:20,875 --> 00:08:22,959 Come on. Talk. Did you guys... 185 00:08:24,750 --> 00:08:27,166 Slappity-slappity-slappity... 186 00:08:27,250 --> 00:08:28,583 Honk, honk! 187 00:08:28,667 --> 00:08:32,458 - You two are having fun, aren't ya? - Yes, luvahs! 188 00:08:33,917 --> 00:08:36,041 Look, I know we all tend to talk about everything, 189 00:08:36,125 --> 00:08:39,625 but, uh, we're not gonna discuss our relationship with you. 190 00:08:39,709 --> 00:08:41,625 It was supes awkward, you guys. 191 00:08:41,709 --> 00:08:43,291 Or we are. I changed my mind. 192 00:08:43,834 --> 00:08:46,458 It's just really hard to go from being regular friends 193 00:08:46,583 --> 00:08:49,834 to being "ee-ee-slappity-slappity - honk-honk" friends. 194 00:08:50,000 --> 00:08:51,333 Jules and I were friends first. 195 00:08:51,417 --> 00:08:54,417 Of course, my flawless body helped us get over any awkward parts. 196 00:08:54,583 --> 00:08:55,709 Hmm. 197 00:08:55,792 --> 00:08:57,166 You guys'll make it. I promise. 198 00:08:57,250 --> 00:09:00,041 Or you won't and you'll be doomed. 199 00:09:00,458 --> 00:09:04,041 - Thanks. - Doomed as luvahs. 200 00:09:08,375 --> 00:09:10,625 Hey, thanks for watching Dog Trav for me. 201 00:09:10,709 --> 00:09:11,750 No problem. 202 00:09:11,834 --> 00:09:13,709 Thank you for not talking too much about your trip 203 00:09:13,834 --> 00:09:15,750 - so I don't get jealous. - Sure! 204 00:09:16,041 --> 00:09:19,458 You know, it's been hard, because the Bahamas are gonna be awesome! 205 00:09:19,792 --> 00:09:22,125 Ando, can you believe that we're going? 206 00:09:22,208 --> 00:09:23,417 - No! - Yeah! 207 00:09:25,166 --> 00:09:26,333 Oh! I got us these T-shirts made. 208 00:09:26,417 --> 00:09:27,667 Ooh, ooh! 209 00:09:27,834 --> 00:09:29,125 {\an8}"Ba-homies." 210 00:09:29,208 --> 00:09:31,542 Ba-homies! Whoo! Sweet. 211 00:09:32,041 --> 00:09:34,792 Anyway, Dog Trav can be tough to connect with. 212 00:09:35,041 --> 00:09:36,083 Dogs love me. 213 00:09:36,166 --> 00:09:38,500 But he's not just some dopey nut-licker. You know? 214 00:09:38,583 --> 00:09:41,041 For DT to love you, he must know that you're pure of heart. 215 00:09:41,709 --> 00:09:43,542 Let's start with a trust exercise, 216 00:09:43,625 --> 00:09:45,542 so he knows that you're not afraid to be vulnerable. 217 00:09:45,834 --> 00:09:47,291 Tell him your most embarrassing secret. 218 00:09:47,750 --> 00:09:49,333 Okay. 219 00:09:50,166 --> 00:09:51,834 I'm lactose intolerant. 220 00:09:53,667 --> 00:09:55,500 Well, somebody's clearly holding back. 221 00:09:55,583 --> 00:09:57,625 Come on, try again. Dig deep. 222 00:10:00,250 --> 00:10:02,375 We can't just drive Chick to the doctor. 223 00:10:02,458 --> 00:10:03,542 We need a fake story. 224 00:10:03,667 --> 00:10:05,542 Like, where's someplace he really wants to go? 225 00:10:05,834 --> 00:10:07,667 Thailand! Right, too far. 226 00:10:08,083 --> 00:10:09,583 Oh! A bikini contest! 227 00:10:09,834 --> 00:10:11,417 Right, because we live in 228 00:10:11,500 --> 00:10:13,458 a straight-to-video National Lampoon movie. 229 00:10:13,750 --> 00:10:16,625 No one's dumb enough to believe we're going to a bikini contest. 230 00:10:16,750 --> 00:10:17,875 Bikini contest? 231 00:10:18,083 --> 00:10:20,041 When, where, and how much are the tickets? 232 00:10:20,125 --> 00:10:21,333 And if they're too pricey, 233 00:10:21,417 --> 00:10:22,875 is there some sort of hole-in-the-fence situation 234 00:10:22,959 --> 00:10:24,083 where we can watch for free? 235 00:10:24,333 --> 00:10:27,083 I don't know how much the tickets are but they can't be too much, can they? 236 00:10:27,375 --> 00:10:29,959 Wait. Is this contest real or made-up? 237 00:10:30,208 --> 00:10:31,583 We're taking Chick to the doctor. 238 00:10:31,667 --> 00:10:33,208 Can I still go to the bikini contest? 239 00:10:33,333 --> 00:10:35,083 Well, I'm sure we can stop there after the doctor's office. 240 00:10:35,250 --> 00:10:37,500 There is no bikini contest! Slap out of it! 241 00:10:37,834 --> 00:10:40,375 Baby, you're sounding just like us. 242 00:10:40,709 --> 00:10:43,000 Yes, you've made me dumber. Congratulations. 243 00:10:43,250 --> 00:10:45,542 I hope Dad's not too mad when he finds out where we're taking him. 244 00:10:45,917 --> 00:10:48,917 Quick hint. When Dog Travis ran away at the kennel, 245 00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:50,834 he would've come back if I had a biscuit. 246 00:10:50,959 --> 00:10:51,959 So just make sure 247 00:10:52,041 --> 00:10:53,750 you keep some of Chick's favourite treats in your pocket, 248 00:10:53,834 --> 00:10:55,291 just in case he bolts. 249 00:10:55,375 --> 00:10:56,458 You're insane. 250 00:10:56,542 --> 00:10:58,625 And this is coming from someone who just made up 251 00:10:58,709 --> 00:11:01,750 and then forgot she made up a fake bikini contest. 252 00:11:02,333 --> 00:11:05,959 Now, I know my dad hates the doctor, but he's not a dog. 253 00:11:11,417 --> 00:11:15,583 - No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! - Dad, wait! I have treats! 254 00:11:15,959 --> 00:11:18,125 - Werther's! - Show me. 255 00:11:19,208 --> 00:11:20,291 Damn it. 256 00:11:22,041 --> 00:11:25,583 Did you ever think about how our first kiss would go down? 257 00:11:25,834 --> 00:11:27,375 A million times. 258 00:11:28,083 --> 00:11:29,250 Tell me. 259 00:11:29,750 --> 00:11:32,166 I think I'd rather show you. 260 00:11:33,250 --> 00:11:34,333 Okay. 261 00:11:36,458 --> 00:11:38,875 So, a few years ago, 262 00:11:38,959 --> 00:11:40,917 I shot a video of you and Smith kissing in the plaza. 263 00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:44,000 I imported it into After Effects and digitally removed Smith, 264 00:11:44,083 --> 00:11:47,917 which, if you've ever rotoscoped before, you know this is a nightmare. 265 00:11:49,125 --> 00:11:52,667 All I gotta do is step up here to the old green screen. 266 00:11:52,875 --> 00:11:54,583 Uh, just keep watching the monitor. 267 00:11:54,959 --> 00:11:56,041 Okay. 268 00:11:56,166 --> 00:11:57,667 Just slide right in here, 269 00:11:58,500 --> 00:12:00,375 and kiss you. 270 00:12:03,500 --> 00:12:09,041 And I just, now this moment, am realising how creepy this is. 271 00:12:09,792 --> 00:12:11,792 No one's ever made me a stalker video 272 00:12:11,875 --> 00:12:14,166 that I didn't have to see in a courtroom first. 273 00:12:15,917 --> 00:12:17,834 I love it. 274 00:12:19,917 --> 00:12:21,542 You know, maybe, um... 275 00:12:22,458 --> 00:12:23,834 Maybe you should tell me 276 00:12:23,917 --> 00:12:26,542 how you thought our first kiss would go, 277 00:12:26,667 --> 00:12:30,083 and, uh, I'll make it happen. 278 00:12:31,625 --> 00:12:33,500 I thought we'd be all dressed up. 279 00:12:34,166 --> 00:12:36,875 I thought we'd be out under the stars. 280 00:12:41,166 --> 00:12:45,917 And then we would hold each other 281 00:12:46,000 --> 00:12:47,834 and lean in... 282 00:12:51,417 --> 00:12:55,500 And then I would notice all your weird roommates staring at us? 283 00:12:55,667 --> 00:12:56,792 Seriously, Garrett? 284 00:12:59,000 --> 00:13:00,542 When I saw my dad in New York, 285 00:13:00,667 --> 00:13:02,458 ice skating with that same woman and her kids, 286 00:13:03,542 --> 00:13:05,542 I asked him point-blank, "Dad? 287 00:13:06,083 --> 00:13:09,208 "Do you have a whole other family that Mom and I don't know about?" 288 00:13:12,500 --> 00:13:14,500 Oh. That means, "Thank you for sharing." 289 00:13:15,291 --> 00:13:17,917 Hey, dummy. The other one. 290 00:13:18,709 --> 00:13:20,917 We have to leave soon and you haven't packed for me yet! 291 00:13:21,291 --> 00:13:23,375 We have to get Dog Travis and Riggs to fall in love. 292 00:13:23,458 --> 00:13:26,125 And I need to stop betraying my mom with my silence. 293 00:13:26,291 --> 00:13:30,000 I can't help you, but I can speed you two geniuses up. 294 00:13:30,291 --> 00:13:31,500 Dogs can't feel love. 295 00:13:31,709 --> 00:13:35,125 That giant thing has a tiny, tiny pea brain. 296 00:13:35,333 --> 00:13:38,041 Oh, Ellie. You're so smart with human stuff 297 00:13:38,166 --> 00:13:39,792 but you're so dumb with dogs. 298 00:13:40,375 --> 00:13:41,500 Game on. 299 00:13:42,083 --> 00:13:45,458 Call your dog. Show me your love for each other. 300 00:13:46,291 --> 00:13:47,417 Come on, buddy! 301 00:13:47,917 --> 00:13:51,875 Come give me a face full of kisses, you big, beautiful bastard! 302 00:13:52,375 --> 00:13:55,417 Hey, dumb animal. Steak. 303 00:13:55,667 --> 00:13:57,625 Dog Trav, don't! 304 00:13:59,166 --> 00:14:01,125 Who held your paw when they took your nuts? 305 00:14:01,208 --> 00:14:02,750 I mean, what we have is real! 306 00:14:08,667 --> 00:14:09,750 He loves me. 307 00:14:12,667 --> 00:14:13,750 This sucks. 308 00:14:13,834 --> 00:14:15,500 We need to leave for the airport in a few hours, 309 00:14:15,583 --> 00:14:16,917 and we haven't even packed yet. 310 00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:18,500 Calm down. We're gonna find him! 311 00:14:18,625 --> 00:14:21,166 We just need to look for something with grey hair and a sweater. 312 00:14:22,875 --> 00:14:24,291 What the... 313 00:14:29,375 --> 00:14:31,750 - Eastwood. - Soup. 314 00:14:31,834 --> 00:14:33,041 Right. 315 00:14:35,458 --> 00:14:36,959 "Hey, Grayson. What'd you do today?" 316 00:14:37,083 --> 00:14:39,750 "Oh, me? Not much, just waded through 10,000 geezers 317 00:14:39,834 --> 00:14:41,500 "searching for an insane old man 318 00:14:41,583 --> 00:14:44,417 "who turned into a dog when he saw a doctor's office." 319 00:14:44,500 --> 00:14:46,417 All right, that's it. 320 00:14:49,834 --> 00:14:51,417 Listen up, old people! 321 00:14:53,792 --> 00:14:56,291 Uh, Mr Eastwood would like to speak. 322 00:14:56,625 --> 00:14:58,500 - What are you doing? - Just go with it. 323 00:15:01,542 --> 00:15:02,917 Make my day. 324 00:15:05,333 --> 00:15:06,542 Hello, chair. 325 00:15:09,333 --> 00:15:11,000 Thank you. 326 00:15:11,458 --> 00:15:15,834 Listen, Dad, I know you're here, and I know what you're wearing. 327 00:15:16,917 --> 00:15:20,250 You gotta help me. She wants to take me to the doctor. 328 00:15:22,417 --> 00:15:24,500 {\an8}I have Werther's now. 329 00:15:25,458 --> 00:15:28,875 If you're standing near my dad, would you please raise your hand? 330 00:15:31,917 --> 00:15:33,583 I'd have made the same choice. 331 00:15:36,959 --> 00:15:39,083 Did, uh, Grayson ask you to tend bar while he's gone? 332 00:15:39,291 --> 00:15:41,375 No. We have to get some plane drinks in us 333 00:15:41,458 --> 00:15:43,250 before we get our plane drinks. 334 00:15:43,333 --> 00:15:44,959 What can I do you for, her-dee-der? 335 00:15:45,500 --> 00:15:47,208 How about a true friend? 336 00:15:47,333 --> 00:15:49,792 Or a love that I can believe in? You have that behind the bar? 337 00:15:50,333 --> 00:15:53,542 - You did this. Are you happy? - I literally cannot stop smiling. 338 00:15:53,792 --> 00:15:57,083 My best friend in the world only cares about his own needs, man. 339 00:15:57,208 --> 00:16:01,041 He was just using me for food and after-dinner butt scratches. 340 00:16:01,291 --> 00:16:03,250 You and Andy have an intense relationship. 341 00:16:03,542 --> 00:16:06,083 He was talking about Dog Travis. 342 00:16:06,166 --> 00:16:08,583 But I've walked in on those two doing weirder stuff. 343 00:16:08,792 --> 00:16:10,250 - No, you haven't. - No? 344 00:16:10,333 --> 00:16:12,291 Should I describe the time I walked in 345 00:16:12,375 --> 00:16:14,750 and you guys were re-enacting the pottery scene from Ghost? 346 00:16:14,875 --> 00:16:17,208 I've told you, we've never even seen that movie. 347 00:16:17,291 --> 00:16:19,041 He just wanted help making a vase. 348 00:16:24,542 --> 00:16:27,291 - You guys want to sit over there? - No, we're fine holding him. 349 00:16:27,375 --> 00:16:30,667 Let's just get this over with. Check me out, sawbones. 350 00:16:30,750 --> 00:16:32,959 Of course, Chick, but I'm not sure why we're doing this. 351 00:16:33,041 --> 00:16:36,083 You were here last month for a full physical, remember? 352 00:16:36,417 --> 00:16:37,792 Oh, that's right. 353 00:16:37,875 --> 00:16:40,375 We talked about how you were starting to have some memory problems. 354 00:16:44,583 --> 00:16:46,500 I told you they'd find something. 355 00:16:49,458 --> 00:16:50,709 - All right. - Mmm. 356 00:16:50,959 --> 00:16:52,917 - I'll see you in a few days. - Okay. 357 00:16:54,875 --> 00:16:57,625 All right, I'm leaving now. Going on my trip. 358 00:16:59,041 --> 00:17:01,750 You know, I could die out there, you know. 359 00:17:01,834 --> 00:17:04,375 Jet ski accident, a booze cruise fire, 360 00:17:05,041 --> 00:17:07,917 or my heart could explode from a too-tight banana hammock. 361 00:17:08,333 --> 00:17:10,917 This could be the last time you see me. 362 00:17:11,375 --> 00:17:14,500 Fine! Whatever, dog. Later! 363 00:17:33,000 --> 00:17:35,333 You think you can fix it just like that, huh? 364 00:17:39,417 --> 00:17:42,458 Aw! I love you, you son of a bitch! 365 00:17:58,583 --> 00:18:01,375 Yeah, I love you, too. I love you, too. 366 00:18:01,458 --> 00:18:03,542 What are we gonna do with us? 367 00:18:06,458 --> 00:18:09,917 Hey. You all packed? 368 00:18:10,458 --> 00:18:12,000 I can't believe we're going on vacation 369 00:18:12,125 --> 00:18:14,709 with this stupid "first kiss" thing still hanging over our heads. 370 00:18:15,125 --> 00:18:18,208 Maybe we should just make out right now and get it over with? 371 00:18:19,625 --> 00:18:20,750 Turn around, Garrett. 372 00:18:22,083 --> 00:18:23,291 I don't even care if they watch. 373 00:18:24,458 --> 00:18:26,959 You know, I once made out with a girl in front of, like, 100 dudes. 374 00:18:27,083 --> 00:18:29,375 But in my defence, one of them had bought me a shot. 375 00:18:29,500 --> 00:18:31,417 No one's ever paid me for kisses. 376 00:18:31,500 --> 00:18:32,917 Except for my mom. 377 00:18:33,000 --> 00:18:36,125 But, uh, you know, end of the month, the rent's due, 378 00:18:36,208 --> 00:18:37,291 sometimes you just gotta pucker up and... 379 00:18:37,375 --> 00:18:39,583 Shh, shut up. I'm coming in. 380 00:18:46,709 --> 00:18:48,125 Grandpa has Alzheimer's? 381 00:18:48,542 --> 00:18:50,333 Yeah, he's in the early stages. 382 00:18:51,125 --> 00:18:54,000 You know, I always thought it was actually called Old-Timer's disease. 383 00:18:54,083 --> 00:18:55,667 I mean, it makes more sense. 384 00:18:56,375 --> 00:18:57,542 Change approved. 385 00:18:57,875 --> 00:19:00,125 All right, look, let's not be sad, okay? 386 00:19:00,875 --> 00:19:02,417 Dad and I talked it out. 387 00:19:02,959 --> 00:19:05,542 We hugged a lot, we cried a whole lot. 388 00:19:06,625 --> 00:19:09,458 And, yes, Old-Timer's disease can take you like that. 389 00:19:09,542 --> 00:19:12,250 But he could also be around for another 10 years. 390 00:19:13,083 --> 00:19:15,709 As a family, we decided that we're gonna stay positive. 391 00:19:16,417 --> 00:19:18,083 Since you're all a part of my family, 392 00:19:18,583 --> 00:19:20,291 I just ask that we're there for each other 393 00:19:20,375 --> 00:19:22,458 and we cherish whatever time that we have. 394 00:19:22,625 --> 00:19:24,750 Other than that, nothing changes. 395 00:19:25,417 --> 00:19:28,125 Well, this seems like it doesn't matter now, 396 00:19:28,208 --> 00:19:30,000 but are we still going on this trip? 397 00:19:30,375 --> 00:19:32,166 Oh, right. One thing changed. 398 00:19:34,583 --> 00:19:39,000 Los Angeles! I can't believe we're actually here! 399 00:19:39,375 --> 00:19:41,333 Yeah. Just like our beaches at home, 400 00:19:42,041 --> 00:19:45,458 except for with smog and weird people. 401 00:19:46,583 --> 00:19:49,125 We can do this! Smiles for Dad, y'all. 402 00:19:49,375 --> 00:19:51,458 {\an8}Yay! Yeah! All right. 403 00:19:55,709 --> 00:19:58,875 Hey, Jules. It's, uh, Tom in the beautiful Bahamas. 404 00:19:58,959 --> 00:20:01,583 Uh, leaving a message because I can't find you guys. 405 00:20:01,667 --> 00:20:02,917 {\an8}I, uh, talked to the hotel clerk. 406 00:20:03,000 --> 00:20:05,625 {\an8}He said that, uh, no one's checked in and the rooms were cancelled. 407 00:20:05,792 --> 00:20:09,250 {\an8}So, if you're running late, no problem, I'll, uh, see you soon. 408 00:20:09,333 --> 00:20:13,750 {\an8}If you guys played a trick on me and, uh, you're not actually showing up, 409 00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:16,083 {\an8}good one. 410 00:20:16,166 --> 00:20:17,709 {\an8}I love when you play gags on me. 411 00:20:17,792 --> 00:20:19,375 {\an8}Um, call me back. 412 00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:21,291 {\an8}This is Tom. 413 00:20:22,291 --> 00:20:23,583 {\an8}Bahamas Tom. 414 00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:26,625 {\an8}Uh, Tommy Bahammy. 32028

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