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1
00:00:00,291 --> 00:00:01,875
I heard this great joke at work.
2
00:00:02,125 --> 00:00:03,166
You work?
3
00:00:03,250 --> 00:00:04,291
Shush it.
4
00:00:04,375 --> 00:00:07,333
Okay, what do you call a pastry chef
with no arms?
5
00:00:07,417 --> 00:00:09,375
Are you talking about
my friend Amanda?
6
00:00:09,458 --> 00:00:10,917
Yeah, she can't be a chef any more
7
00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:13,208
since she lost her arms
in that Pilates accident.
8
00:00:13,542 --> 00:00:15,333
Why do you always make jokes so sad?
9
00:00:15,667 --> 00:00:17,583
This will cheer you up!
I have really good news.
10
00:00:17,667 --> 00:00:20,417
- Are you sterile?
- Wade and I are moving in together.
11
00:00:20,750 --> 00:00:22,000
Well, congratulations.
12
00:00:22,166 --> 00:00:24,333
Congratulations!
That's wonderful news.
13
00:00:24,500 --> 00:00:27,834
Ready to commit and handsome?
You are the total package, man.
14
00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:29,375
You already have a best friend.
15
00:00:29,542 --> 00:00:30,917
It doesn't mean I can't look.
16
00:00:31,041 --> 00:00:32,125
Okay.
17
00:00:32,250 --> 00:00:33,709
Welcome to the gang, Wade.
18
00:00:34,083 --> 00:00:35,917
I only joined this crew a few weeks ago.
19
00:00:36,000 --> 00:00:37,542
Huge honour, don't blow it.
20
00:00:37,750 --> 00:00:40,417
Oh, speaking of which,
we are out of wine.
21
00:00:40,500 --> 00:00:41,667
And as the newest member...
22
00:00:41,750 --> 00:00:44,667
I will buy some wine.
So, uh, what? Two bottles?
23
00:00:46,291 --> 00:00:48,083
- Two bottles.
- Three bottles?
24
00:00:48,375 --> 00:00:50,667
Oh, my God, stop it.
25
00:00:56,583 --> 00:00:58,417
Hey, guys, Tom's worried,
26
00:00:58,500 --> 00:01:00,417
since he's no longer
the group "new guy,"
27
00:01:00,500 --> 00:01:02,041
he needs a different role.
28
00:01:02,208 --> 00:01:05,083
{\an8}Group "weirdo"? Group "parrot-face"?
29
00:01:05,166 --> 00:01:07,208
{\an8}Group "guy who's not really in
the group"?
30
00:01:07,333 --> 00:01:09,500
{\an8}But I was thinking more, like,
a group "cheerleader."
31
00:01:09,583 --> 00:01:11,000
{\an8}Someone who could make us
feel special.
32
00:01:11,291 --> 00:01:12,375
{\an8}I would actually love that.
33
00:01:12,667 --> 00:01:14,375
{\an8}Oh, no, it'd just be for me.
34
00:01:14,458 --> 00:01:16,166
{\an8}Fantastic idea, Jules!
35
00:01:16,500 --> 00:01:17,625
{\an8}Thanks, Tom!
36
00:01:17,792 --> 00:01:19,917
{\an8}I am never gonna get sick of this.
37
00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:23,458
{\an8}You guys, Wade is such a great person,
38
00:01:23,625 --> 00:01:27,542
{\an8}I really think that I would like him
even if he wasn't black.
39
00:01:27,709 --> 00:01:29,000
{\an8}- Oh, wow!
- Whoa!
40
00:01:29,166 --> 00:01:30,208
{\an8}- Wow.
- Yeah.
41
00:01:30,291 --> 00:01:31,875
{\an8}So how did Trav take it when
he found out
42
00:01:32,000 --> 00:01:33,542
{\an8}you two were shacking up?
43
00:01:34,250 --> 00:01:36,834
{\an8}I haven't really told him yet.
44
00:01:37,083 --> 00:01:39,041
{\an8}Emergency meeting.
Everyone out except Laurie!
45
00:01:39,417 --> 00:01:40,542
{\an8}What?
46
00:01:41,125 --> 00:01:44,208
{\an8}Hey, half-pint, I'm worried
our kid's getting dumber.
47
00:01:44,291 --> 00:01:47,291
{\an8}Today I caught him in the toilet
wearing goggles.
48
00:01:47,375 --> 00:01:50,458
{\an8}Take him somewhere where
he can learn something, like the library.
49
00:01:50,542 --> 00:01:52,291
{\an8}- Do it.
- Hmm. Sure, that'll be fun.
50
00:01:56,291 --> 00:01:58,166
{\an8}- Man, I love the library!
- Yee-haw!
51
00:01:58,625 --> 00:02:00,166
{\an8}See you, suckers.
52
00:02:01,500 --> 00:02:03,333
{\an8}He finally outgrew
his devil baby stage, huh?
53
00:02:03,959 --> 00:02:05,542
{\an8}Yeah, Stan's been a real angel.
54
00:02:05,625 --> 00:02:07,166
{\an8}But you know what that means.
55
00:02:07,250 --> 00:02:09,917
{\an8}He's plotting something.
Something big.
56
00:02:10,125 --> 00:02:11,375
{\an8}No!
57
00:02:16,375 --> 00:02:19,250
{\an8}With all this Wade stuff, I have to ask,
58
00:02:19,333 --> 00:02:21,333
{\an8}how come you and Travis
never happened?
59
00:02:21,917 --> 00:02:24,333
{\an8}Trav is awesome.
60
00:02:24,458 --> 00:02:27,959
{\an8}You know, he's sweet and he's smart.
61
00:02:28,667 --> 00:02:29,834
{\an8}But it's weird.
62
00:02:29,959 --> 00:02:33,834
{\an8}You know, I saw him naked in
the bathtub when he was, like, 12.
63
00:02:34,083 --> 00:02:36,917
{\an8}To be fair,
his body has changed a lot since then.
64
00:02:37,458 --> 00:02:39,125
{\an8}Why would I...
65
00:02:39,250 --> 00:02:42,792
{\an8}What if things went bad
between me and Trav?
66
00:02:43,041 --> 00:02:46,291
{\an8}- I mean, if I ever hurt him...
- Well, I'd have to kill you.
67
00:02:46,375 --> 00:02:47,959
{\an8}Right.
68
00:02:48,417 --> 00:02:50,083
{\an8}No, seriously, I would kill you.
69
00:02:50,166 --> 00:02:52,375
{\an8}I've thought about it,
and I know how I'd get away with it.
70
00:02:52,583 --> 00:02:55,125
My girl is super smart!
She could murder anyone!
71
00:02:55,500 --> 00:02:57,834
- Thanks, Tom.
- Oh, thank you, Jules.
72
00:02:58,834 --> 00:03:00,834
I need you to be honest with me.
73
00:03:00,917 --> 00:03:04,041
Is our friendship the reason why
the two of you haven't gotten together?
74
00:03:04,542 --> 00:03:05,750
Sweetie...
75
00:03:05,834 --> 00:03:07,375
'Cause it would kill me if
I ever thought that
76
00:03:07,458 --> 00:03:09,542
I was keeping Travis from being happy.
77
00:03:09,625 --> 00:03:10,667
Or you.
78
00:03:10,917 --> 00:03:16,083
Yes, Travis and I have had
all of those "almost" moments.
79
00:03:16,750 --> 00:03:20,333
But if it was meant to be,
it would've happened, right?
80
00:03:20,792 --> 00:03:24,542
I just don't see us ever getting together,
I don't.
81
00:03:26,166 --> 00:03:29,458
So, you just moved in with
the girl that's never said no.
82
00:03:30,125 --> 00:03:33,834
I assume there's a lot of smacking,
flipping and rubbing it down, oh, no?
83
00:03:34,250 --> 00:03:36,834
Yeah, I actually like to keep
our private life private.
84
00:03:38,875 --> 00:03:40,125
She's already told you everything.
85
00:03:40,375 --> 00:03:42,166
Told us, showed us videos.
86
00:03:42,250 --> 00:03:45,166
By the way,
you have amazing upper-body strength.
87
00:03:45,417 --> 00:03:47,333
And beautiful glutes.
88
00:03:47,792 --> 00:03:49,750
This, um, wouldn't be weird if
we were at a gym.
89
00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:51,375
- Yes, it would.
- Yeah.
90
00:03:51,500 --> 00:03:54,417
When we were younger,
I used to let Andy hit this constantly.
91
00:03:54,500 --> 00:03:57,000
Now it's only on Sunday when
Tom mows his grass.
92
00:03:57,083 --> 00:03:58,417
The sound of the mower covers
93
00:03:58,500 --> 00:04:01,208
the wheezing and grunting noises
that Andy makes.
94
00:04:01,291 --> 00:04:03,083
- Okay, I gotta go.
- Where?
95
00:04:03,166 --> 00:04:04,458
Anywhere.
96
00:04:05,083 --> 00:04:09,041
Once a week on Sunday afternoons?
Girl, you nasty.
97
00:04:09,458 --> 00:04:11,750
You think
Jules doesn't tell me everything?
98
00:04:12,250 --> 00:04:14,000
You guys only got married
a few months ago,
99
00:04:14,083 --> 00:04:16,667
and you only do it
one-and-a-half times a week.
100
00:04:16,959 --> 00:04:20,500
Oh, yeah? I have no comeback to that.
101
00:04:20,792 --> 00:04:22,458
Another emergency meeting.
102
00:04:22,834 --> 00:04:24,834
Why do we only have sex
one-and-a-half times a week?
103
00:04:24,917 --> 00:04:27,250
Are we already old and boring?
And what's the half?
104
00:04:27,333 --> 00:04:29,291
That's that thing
I let you watch me do in the shower.
105
00:04:29,500 --> 00:04:31,041
Oh, okay. Yeah, fair enough.
106
00:04:31,250 --> 00:04:33,625
- Ellie, did you do this?
- Yep.
107
00:04:33,792 --> 00:04:37,417
Would it make it better if
tomorrow we have the sexiest day ever?
108
00:04:37,500 --> 00:04:41,250
Oh, yeah. Forget one-and-a-half.
We'll turn those halves into wholes.
109
00:04:41,750 --> 00:04:44,083
It'll be all wholes all day.
110
00:04:45,750 --> 00:04:46,959
Why, did I say something funny?
111
00:04:47,291 --> 00:04:48,583
Not on purpose.
112
00:04:48,959 --> 00:04:51,709
Okay, who's gonna tell Travis
about Laurie and Wade?
113
00:04:52,083 --> 00:04:53,166
I mean, this is sensitive,
114
00:04:53,250 --> 00:04:56,083
so I wanna limit this to the people
who really need to be here.
115
00:04:56,208 --> 00:04:58,750
I mean, Laurie, it's about you.
Bobby, you're his dad.
116
00:04:58,959 --> 00:05:02,166
Grayson, you're my husband.
And Ellie's my rock.
117
00:05:05,250 --> 00:05:08,166
It would've been easier to say,
"Everyone but Andy."
118
00:05:08,250 --> 00:05:11,125
Look, babe,
if you want me to tell Travis, I will.
119
00:05:11,291 --> 00:05:12,583
That's not sincere.
120
00:05:12,834 --> 00:05:14,291
Nope, just trying to score points.
121
00:05:14,667 --> 00:05:17,125
Okay, let's cut to the chase.
It's clear it has to be
122
00:05:17,208 --> 00:05:19,875
either the girl who broke his heart
or the suffocating mom.
123
00:05:20,000 --> 00:05:22,917
Wow, when did you
finally realise that you suffocate him?
124
00:05:23,166 --> 00:05:26,709
Friday night. I woke up in the middle of
the night missing him and...
125
00:05:26,792 --> 00:05:29,000
Well, long story short,
I broke into his place,
126
00:05:29,333 --> 00:05:33,041
and I crawled into bed with him,
and then his roommates "caught" us.
127
00:05:33,125 --> 00:05:34,792
Whatever, it was so bad.
128
00:05:34,917 --> 00:05:35,959
Again?
129
00:05:36,041 --> 00:05:39,125
I know I should be the one to tell Travis.
130
00:05:39,208 --> 00:05:42,000
I just can't stand
the thought of hurting him.
131
00:05:42,166 --> 00:05:43,500
Oh.
132
00:05:44,041 --> 00:05:45,375
Maybe that's the answer.
133
00:05:45,458 --> 00:05:48,166
Maybe we do sexy times once,
134
00:05:48,250 --> 00:05:52,542
but I make it so bad that it takes
all of the magic out of it, right?
135
00:05:52,959 --> 00:05:57,458
Only, you guys,
I don't know if I can be bad in bed.
136
00:05:57,875 --> 00:06:02,000
Jellybean, your head hurts when
you try to solve problems, doesn't it?
137
00:06:02,375 --> 00:06:04,125
It actually does, like...
138
00:06:04,333 --> 00:06:07,000
Fine, I've got to go to his place
and get my mouthguard anyway.
139
00:06:07,083 --> 00:06:08,333
I'll do it.
140
00:06:08,417 --> 00:06:09,875
You'll do what?
141
00:06:12,417 --> 00:06:15,667
Start our quiet contest now. And go.
142
00:06:19,625 --> 00:06:21,542
You rock, Jules! You're the quietest!
143
00:06:21,750 --> 00:06:22,792
Shh.
144
00:06:27,125 --> 00:06:29,333
You ready to start the sexiest day ever?
145
00:06:29,542 --> 00:06:30,583
Let's do this.
146
00:06:34,375 --> 00:06:36,000
Welcome to Naked Day.
147
00:06:36,917 --> 00:06:37,959
Hmm.
148
00:06:39,333 --> 00:06:42,917
Did you ever notice how many things
in this house are boob-high?
149
00:06:43,125 --> 00:06:45,000
I actually graduated from Boob High.
150
00:06:45,166 --> 00:06:48,208
- Really?
- You're right. Naked Day is serious.
151
00:06:48,291 --> 00:06:49,667
Come on, let's have some coffee.
152
00:06:49,750 --> 00:06:51,750
Nope, I have to stay in this spot.
153
00:06:52,166 --> 00:06:53,208
It's the only place in the house where
154
00:06:53,291 --> 00:06:55,709
the light really works on
a 43-year-old body.
155
00:06:55,834 --> 00:06:56,917
You look amazing.
156
00:06:57,208 --> 00:06:59,834
Aw, thanks, honey, but watch.
157
00:07:00,041 --> 00:07:02,834
Top Model. Top Chef.
158
00:07:04,041 --> 00:07:07,667
Oh, baby!
Oh, baby.
159
00:07:08,291 --> 00:07:10,166
- Morning. Nice tush.
- Ow.
160
00:07:10,458 --> 00:07:11,500
Seriously?
161
00:07:11,583 --> 00:07:13,375
Calm down,
I've seen her junk a million times.
162
00:07:13,583 --> 00:07:16,917
We decided that her nipples would
look better on my boobs and vice-versa.
163
00:07:17,333 --> 00:07:19,333
I'd have to see 'em side by side.
164
00:07:19,417 --> 00:07:21,917
Jules is rocking the birthday suit!
165
00:07:22,000 --> 00:07:23,041
Now we have a party.
166
00:07:23,250 --> 00:07:24,375
Thanks, Tom.
167
00:07:24,500 --> 00:07:26,000
Whoa, why are
you putting on your robe?
168
00:07:26,083 --> 00:07:28,542
I've got a quick emergency meeting
about Travis,
169
00:07:28,625 --> 00:07:31,875
but I'll be back before you know it,
nude, standing in my spot.
170
00:07:36,417 --> 00:07:40,041
You know how Grayson calls his chest
"The Truth" and his back "Justice"?
171
00:07:40,500 --> 00:07:42,959
Well, I think he should call his johnson
"The American Way."
172
00:07:43,041 --> 00:07:45,417
That's gold, J-Bird, but why tell me?
173
00:07:45,667 --> 00:07:48,250
Well, he won't let me nickname it.
I think he might let you do it.
174
00:07:48,375 --> 00:07:51,041
Oh, gotcha. All right, I'll bring it up
next time we're at a urinal.
175
00:07:51,166 --> 00:07:52,750
I thought you called this emerg meeting
176
00:07:52,834 --> 00:07:54,917
to help figure out how
to break the news to Trav?
177
00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:58,875
Hey, just don't coddle the boy, okay?
Hit him with the harsh truth.
178
00:07:59,166 --> 00:08:01,959
Bobby, you know
Travis doesn't handle bad news well.
179
00:08:02,083 --> 00:08:04,333
Remember the last time
he took off to Hawaii?
180
00:08:05,250 --> 00:08:07,709
What? You guys, that's the right way
to say Hawaii.
181
00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:09,500
I don't care, I still hate it.
182
00:08:09,917 --> 00:08:12,250
Look, whenever I have to give
crappy news to Travis,
183
00:08:12,333 --> 00:08:15,041
I'd like to get him in a happy place
so he can handle it.
184
00:08:15,125 --> 00:08:17,208
I used to have the perfect system.
185
00:08:19,542 --> 00:08:20,917
You failed kindergarten.
186
00:08:24,083 --> 00:08:25,834
You gave the whole school head lice.
187
00:08:29,250 --> 00:08:31,083
Your dad and I are getting a divorce.
188
00:08:31,500 --> 00:08:35,166
Shocker! Didn't see that one coming
for the last five years.
189
00:08:35,291 --> 00:08:37,500
- You still want to get ice cream?
- You know it!
190
00:08:38,625 --> 00:08:41,875
Huh, Grayson's doing
dishes butt-naked.
191
00:08:49,583 --> 00:08:53,709
Not bad. Whose do you like more,
mine or G-Man's?
192
00:08:53,792 --> 00:08:55,834
Hmm, sixes.
193
00:08:55,917 --> 00:08:57,500
- Six-and-a-halves.
- Hmm.
194
00:08:57,959 --> 00:09:00,166
Dad, can you toss me my crayons?
195
00:09:02,208 --> 00:09:03,375
Yeah, maybe drawing a picture
196
00:09:03,458 --> 00:09:05,834
will keep his mind off
whatever horrible thing he's plotting.
197
00:09:06,083 --> 00:09:08,083
Don't assume that
Stan's up to something bad.
198
00:09:08,166 --> 00:09:09,750
I mean, if you expect the worst
out of kids,
199
00:09:09,834 --> 00:09:11,500
then that's what you're gonna get.
200
00:09:11,583 --> 00:09:14,917
Hell, my parents always figured
I'd drop out of college, and I did.
201
00:09:15,250 --> 00:09:17,750
So, you're saying if they were
supportive, you would've graduated?
202
00:09:17,834 --> 00:09:20,125
Oh, well, let's not get crazy.
School's for nerds.
203
00:09:20,709 --> 00:09:22,083
Oh, I do not feel good.
204
00:09:22,333 --> 00:09:25,125
This always happens
whenever I disagree with you.
205
00:09:26,417 --> 00:09:28,875
You don't know my kid.
Bobby, you're wrong.
206
00:09:28,959 --> 00:09:30,709
Oh, I have got to lie down.
207
00:09:30,792 --> 00:09:33,125
First Jules questions my parenting
and now you.
208
00:09:33,291 --> 00:09:34,542
I mean, I'm a good parent, damn it!
209
00:09:34,709 --> 00:09:36,166
When Travis lost a toenail,
210
00:09:36,250 --> 00:09:38,917
you super-glued it back to his foot
and stuck all of his toes together.
211
00:09:39,208 --> 00:09:40,959
He made the swim team, didn't he?
212
00:09:41,500 --> 00:09:43,208
All right, guys, Travis is on his way.
213
00:09:43,291 --> 00:09:44,834
Now, everyone's here
that needs to be here.
214
00:09:45,083 --> 00:09:49,208
We have the rock, the dad, the girl,
the husband...
215
00:09:50,542 --> 00:09:51,583
I got nothing.
216
00:09:51,875 --> 00:09:55,041
I don't understand why
I don't get to be part of Travis' pain.
217
00:09:55,625 --> 00:09:58,583
Okay, guys, it's show time.
Everybody, act really happy! Happy.
218
00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:01,834
Well, if E-train does that,
he'll know something's up.
219
00:10:01,959 --> 00:10:03,667
Good point. Ellie, be yourself.
220
00:10:04,417 --> 00:10:05,500
Hey, everyone.
221
00:10:05,583 --> 00:10:08,709
Hey, pale face.
How's the sun feel for the first time?
222
00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:13,375
This is 50, this is you.
Look how close they are.
223
00:10:13,458 --> 00:10:15,208
May I kill him?
224
00:10:15,500 --> 00:10:17,667
Sweetie, come on now.
225
00:10:18,375 --> 00:10:19,417
Let's go racing.
226
00:10:26,667 --> 00:10:27,792
Whoo!
227
00:10:28,083 --> 00:10:29,333
Oh!
228
00:10:35,291 --> 00:10:37,375
{\an8}Aw, Stan.
229
00:10:42,166 --> 00:10:44,083
Not good, not good, not good.
230
00:10:44,792 --> 00:10:47,041
- You sure you wanna do this?
- Oh, yeah.
231
00:10:47,125 --> 00:10:50,667
When Naked Day gets put on hold,
we knock it out in a public bathroom.
232
00:10:50,750 --> 00:10:52,667
That's how we roll.
233
00:10:52,750 --> 00:10:54,875
Okay, no one's looking, let's go.
Go, go, go.
234
00:10:59,083 --> 00:11:00,542
Oh! Whoo!
235
00:11:00,625 --> 00:11:03,125
That is a smell
I have never smelled before.
236
00:11:03,208 --> 00:11:06,208
- That's like a hot stink.
- Ugh!
237
00:11:06,625 --> 00:11:07,875
Oh, come here.
238
00:11:15,291 --> 00:11:16,709
- What?
- You zipped it.
239
00:11:16,792 --> 00:11:18,834
- Oh, God.
- It's stuck.
240
00:11:18,917 --> 00:11:20,458
"The American Way" is stuck.
241
00:11:20,542 --> 00:11:22,625
Aw, did Bobby talk to you?
242
00:11:22,709 --> 00:11:24,834
- I think I'm gonna black out.
- Damn.
243
00:11:28,750 --> 00:11:30,333
How did it go in there, lover boy?
244
00:11:30,417 --> 00:11:31,500
Die.
245
00:11:32,583 --> 00:11:33,625
Whoo!
246
00:11:33,709 --> 00:11:35,583
Whoa! Whoo!
247
00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:38,709
Fine, you won. But that was close.
248
00:11:38,875 --> 00:11:42,333
Oh, please, child, I was putting lipstick
on when I passed you.
249
00:11:43,583 --> 00:11:46,166
No, seriously, I was putting lipstick on.
250
00:11:46,250 --> 00:11:49,166
I don't even care, that was so fun!
251
00:11:49,417 --> 00:11:51,125
Why don't we go out to lunch and talk?
252
00:11:51,250 --> 00:11:53,166
- Hey! There you are!
- Oh, hi.
253
00:11:53,250 --> 00:11:55,542
Hey, look, I know you're hanging
with your friends and all,
254
00:11:55,625 --> 00:11:57,625
but, uh, I don't know my way
around your town still,
255
00:11:57,709 --> 00:11:59,500
and I can't find our place.
256
00:11:59,583 --> 00:12:00,625
Oh.
257
00:12:00,750 --> 00:12:03,250
Wait, you guys moved in together?
258
00:12:03,709 --> 00:12:05,625
Yeah, we did actually.
259
00:12:05,959 --> 00:12:07,583
That's great.
260
00:12:07,667 --> 00:12:10,917
That's, uh, you know, great.
261
00:12:11,458 --> 00:12:12,792
Did you guys hear the news?
262
00:12:16,250 --> 00:12:17,834
Really?
263
00:12:18,125 --> 00:12:19,458
Is that why we're here?
264
00:12:19,542 --> 00:12:22,083
Is this just another coin-operated car?
265
00:12:22,250 --> 00:12:24,625
Travis, let me explain.
266
00:12:32,166 --> 00:12:33,417
Whoa! Whoa!
267
00:12:35,750 --> 00:12:36,792
Travis!
268
00:12:47,041 --> 00:12:48,709
How much for these?
269
00:12:50,291 --> 00:12:53,166
That stupid go-kart crash
cost me 600 bucks.
270
00:12:53,250 --> 00:12:56,166
On the plus side,
we all have new sunglasses.
271
00:12:57,709 --> 00:13:00,875
Dude, could you please
put something on?
272
00:13:01,125 --> 00:13:02,667
It's Naked Day, damn it.
273
00:13:02,750 --> 00:13:03,834
Do you shave your butt?
274
00:13:03,917 --> 00:13:05,000
It's my business.
275
00:13:05,083 --> 00:13:06,417
He doesn't. I do it for him.
276
00:13:06,667 --> 00:13:07,917
Okay, guys, we need to focus.
277
00:13:08,125 --> 00:13:10,083
Trav is probably mad at all of us.
278
00:13:10,166 --> 00:13:12,542
J-Bird, would I be throwing you
under the bus
279
00:13:12,625 --> 00:13:13,834
if I called Trav and said that
280
00:13:13,917 --> 00:13:16,166
I wanted to tell him up front,
but you wouldn't let me?
281
00:13:16,250 --> 00:13:17,291
Yes!
282
00:13:17,542 --> 00:13:20,166
Well, then, I'm sorry for throwing you
under the bus about an hour ago.
283
00:13:20,500 --> 00:13:21,625
That's so unfair.
284
00:13:21,709 --> 00:13:24,375
I can't even apologise now,
since he took off again.
285
00:13:24,500 --> 00:13:26,542
Oh, where did he go? Hawaii?
286
00:13:26,625 --> 00:13:28,917
Okay, I've warned you.
287
00:13:29,000 --> 00:13:31,709
If you say it like that again
we are so fighting.
288
00:13:34,250 --> 00:13:38,542
Mom, I want you to know that I'm okay,
but I don't wanna talk.
289
00:13:38,625 --> 00:13:40,542
I'm gonna camp out for a while,
290
00:13:41,333 --> 00:13:42,625
just gonna live off the land,
291
00:13:42,709 --> 00:13:46,625
maybe grow a beard,
if that's even possible.
292
00:13:48,333 --> 00:13:49,500
Don't look for me.
293
00:13:49,959 --> 00:13:53,333
Ah. This is all my fault.
I'm such a bad mom.
294
00:13:53,500 --> 00:13:54,917
The worst mom!
295
00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:56,709
Okay, I think it's time
for that to be over.
296
00:13:56,875 --> 00:13:58,375
She knows what she wants.
297
00:13:58,667 --> 00:14:00,041
I don't think
I can make him stop.
298
00:14:00,375 --> 00:14:02,542
She doubts herself. She's only human.
299
00:14:03,542 --> 00:14:04,583
I'll go.
300
00:14:04,667 --> 00:14:08,417
If Trav really is camping in
what appears to be the Amazon,
301
00:14:08,542 --> 00:14:10,417
why is he holding a TV remote?
302
00:14:12,959 --> 00:14:14,959
Emergency meeting. Now.
303
00:14:15,375 --> 00:14:16,750
Great.
304
00:14:20,709 --> 00:14:22,083
Stan?
305
00:14:23,041 --> 00:14:24,917
Buddy, is that you?
306
00:14:27,834 --> 00:14:29,834
Stan! Stan...
307
00:14:29,917 --> 00:14:31,917
Oh! Oh! Oh, don't kill me!
308
00:14:32,000 --> 00:14:34,208
Take your mom,
I love you more than she does!
309
00:14:34,375 --> 00:14:35,792
Oh!
310
00:14:39,291 --> 00:14:40,709
Huh...
311
00:14:43,166 --> 00:14:44,417
Oh.
312
00:14:44,500 --> 00:14:48,792
There is nothing sadder than
a naked guy all alone on Naked Day.
313
00:14:49,083 --> 00:14:51,583
I thought my wife would care if
I was nude for her.
314
00:14:51,792 --> 00:14:54,917
If you ever write a suicide note,
that's how it should start.
315
00:14:55,417 --> 00:14:56,583
The cliché is true.
316
00:14:56,667 --> 00:14:59,208
When you first fall in love,
it's all hot and sexy.
317
00:14:59,458 --> 00:15:00,542
And then you get married,
318
00:15:00,625 --> 00:15:03,583
then it's once a week,
lights off, socks on.
319
00:15:03,917 --> 00:15:05,083
Jules wears socks?
320
00:15:05,291 --> 00:15:08,417
Two pair.
Her feet and her hands get cold.
321
00:15:08,542 --> 00:15:10,208
I am stealing that.
322
00:15:10,625 --> 00:15:15,500
Look, dime eyes, we're not young,
stupid couples that are naked all day
323
00:15:15,583 --> 00:15:18,458
or trying to get Hep C
by doing it in public bathrooms.
324
00:15:18,917 --> 00:15:20,417
Until I started torturing you,
325
00:15:20,709 --> 00:15:23,083
weren't you happy with
your one-and-a-half times a week?
326
00:15:23,166 --> 00:15:24,250
I guess.
327
00:15:24,417 --> 00:15:26,542
Well, then stop acting like
it's the end of the world.
328
00:15:27,667 --> 00:15:28,750
Thanks.
329
00:15:28,959 --> 00:15:30,125
Sure.
330
00:15:30,750 --> 00:15:33,000
I'm sorry, I can't really have
a nice moment with you
331
00:15:33,083 --> 00:15:34,625
when you have it tucked behind
like that.
332
00:15:35,583 --> 00:15:37,291
I was trying to be respectful.
333
00:15:37,583 --> 00:15:38,834
Just put it out.
334
00:15:41,375 --> 00:15:43,959
I know you're probably
not happy to see either one of us.
335
00:15:44,250 --> 00:15:47,208
No, no, it's great.
336
00:15:47,291 --> 00:15:48,583
I mean, most people don't get a chance
337
00:15:48,667 --> 00:15:51,542
to actually live out
their worst nightmare.
338
00:15:52,583 --> 00:15:55,709
Okay, who's gonna get this ball rolling?
339
00:15:57,375 --> 00:16:01,959
So, Laurie, what's new?
340
00:16:03,083 --> 00:16:05,917
Just the whole
me-moving-in-with-Wade thing.
341
00:16:06,417 --> 00:16:07,500
Right.
342
00:16:07,917 --> 00:16:10,250
I'm really sorry, Travis.
343
00:16:10,667 --> 00:16:12,041
I should have told you.
344
00:16:12,750 --> 00:16:15,625
No, it's cool. I'm mostly pissed at her.
345
00:16:15,709 --> 00:16:17,250
Oh, God.
346
00:16:17,834 --> 00:16:19,834
Hey, babe, it's not really a good time.
347
00:16:20,542 --> 00:16:22,375
Oh, I don't care what we have for dinner.
348
00:16:24,125 --> 00:16:25,583
Throttle it back, Ando.
349
00:16:25,667 --> 00:16:28,250
Ah, I can't, my heart is racing.
350
00:16:28,333 --> 00:16:30,291
Oh, I think I'm gonna die.
351
00:16:30,667 --> 00:16:32,208
- Oh.
- Hey, I'm here for you, buddy, all right?
352
00:16:32,291 --> 00:16:33,417
Just look into my eyes.
353
00:16:33,834 --> 00:16:35,750
They're so blue.
354
00:16:36,166 --> 00:16:38,709
There, all better.
355
00:16:39,250 --> 00:16:40,834
Why would you mess with me?
356
00:16:41,125 --> 00:16:43,333
My world doesn't work if
you mess with me.
357
00:16:43,458 --> 00:16:48,208
Everyone jokes about
Stan being a devil baby, but not you.
358
00:16:48,375 --> 00:16:51,500
You never bought into it, and that's
what makes you such a great person.
359
00:16:51,792 --> 00:16:54,083
You're the guy that
always believes in everyone.
360
00:16:54,583 --> 00:16:59,083
Even me, and I use
an old bathroom candle as deodorant.
361
00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:05,458
So from one father to another,
you gotta always believe in your son.
362
00:17:07,625 --> 00:17:09,000
I hear you.
363
00:17:18,125 --> 00:17:22,250
Thanks for all these shades.
I've always wanted to do this!
364
00:17:23,291 --> 00:17:27,000
You know, this whole thing with Laurie,
I was just trying to protect you, right?
365
00:17:27,250 --> 00:17:29,125
I know, Mom.
366
00:17:30,166 --> 00:17:32,709
You know, your dad says
I need to stop doing that.
367
00:17:33,333 --> 00:17:36,458
He thinks I need to let you face
the harsh truth every once in a while.
368
00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:38,083
He's probably right.
369
00:17:38,208 --> 00:17:40,542
I mean, sometimes your dad is
a better parent than me.
370
00:17:42,709 --> 00:17:45,375
- "No, he's not."
- Sorry. No, he's not.
371
00:17:45,625 --> 00:17:47,917
No, sometimes he is.
372
00:17:48,375 --> 00:17:50,834
Because he knows that it's not
373
00:17:50,917 --> 00:17:53,792
how you deal with the good times
that makes you a stronger person,
374
00:17:53,917 --> 00:17:56,208
it's how you handle disappointment.
375
00:17:58,208 --> 00:17:59,250
Fine, harsh truth.
376
00:17:59,333 --> 00:18:01,542
Do Laurie and I have a shot
at ending up together?
377
00:18:01,875 --> 00:18:04,291
Well, we don't need to
start harsh-truthing it right away.
378
00:18:04,625 --> 00:18:06,000
Mom...
379
00:18:06,625 --> 00:18:07,750
Okay.
380
00:18:08,000 --> 00:18:09,166
No.
381
00:18:09,625 --> 00:18:13,125
She said that
she has something real with Wade now.
382
00:18:14,166 --> 00:18:15,333
I am sorry.
383
00:18:16,542 --> 00:18:19,583
No, it's good.
384
00:18:20,083 --> 00:18:23,625
'Cause I can finally just let it go.
385
00:18:24,542 --> 00:18:26,125
I'm free.
386
00:18:26,417 --> 00:18:27,709
I'm glad.
387
00:18:29,250 --> 00:18:30,375
Hey.
388
00:18:30,959 --> 00:18:36,166
Hey. Look, I just wanna say that
I'm really happy for you and Wade.
389
00:18:36,458 --> 00:18:37,667
I mean it.
390
00:18:37,750 --> 00:18:40,417
You know,
you're moving forward in your life,
391
00:18:41,250 --> 00:18:45,667
and I should, too,
and, uh, I think it's a good thing.
392
00:18:46,250 --> 00:18:47,542
Thanks.
393
00:18:48,000 --> 00:18:50,250
So, I'll see you around?
394
00:18:50,834 --> 00:18:52,583
Always.
395
00:18:53,583 --> 00:18:55,291
- Bye, honey.
- Bye.
396
00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:02,083
What's wrong?
397
00:19:02,375 --> 00:19:06,333
Just, it seems like
he got over me really fast.
398
00:19:06,709 --> 00:19:08,291
But that's good.
399
00:19:08,375 --> 00:19:09,875
That's what I want.
400
00:19:10,750 --> 00:19:12,083
Jules, is that what I want?
401
00:19:12,417 --> 00:19:13,834
Oh, good God.
402
00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:18,834
Wow, today was a giant crap sandwich.
403
00:19:19,125 --> 00:19:20,208
You don't have to do that.
404
00:19:20,458 --> 00:19:21,875
It's Naked Day for three more hours.
405
00:19:22,333 --> 00:19:23,500
Come here.
406
00:19:23,917 --> 00:19:27,000
Look, I've been thinking, Jules.
407
00:19:27,083 --> 00:19:29,500
I'm happy with what we have.
408
00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:32,709
You know, we're in our 40s,
and I don't want Hep C.
409
00:19:32,875 --> 00:19:33,959
What now?
410
00:19:34,250 --> 00:19:35,583
It made sense when Ellie said it.
411
00:19:35,667 --> 00:19:38,458
Look, the point is that
one-and-a-half times a week is fine,
412
00:19:38,542 --> 00:19:41,500
and that "half" thing you do,
that is special.
413
00:19:41,583 --> 00:19:43,291
Seriously, people would pay to see that.
414
00:19:43,375 --> 00:19:44,625
Really?
415
00:19:45,208 --> 00:19:48,250
All right, you listen to me,
we're not Ellie and Andy.
416
00:19:48,417 --> 00:19:51,166
I mean, if you're happy with
what we're doing, then I'm cool with it,
417
00:19:51,250 --> 00:19:54,458
but if you're not, I'm game for anything.
418
00:19:55,041 --> 00:19:57,208
- Seriously?
- Yes.
419
00:19:57,291 --> 00:19:59,250
And I don't want Ellie
messing with our marriage.
420
00:20:00,000 --> 00:20:01,500
So you take your clothes off
421
00:20:01,583 --> 00:20:04,000
and come outside
and finish Naked Day.
422
00:20:04,458 --> 00:20:05,583
Why outside?
423
00:20:05,917 --> 00:20:08,542
You're gonna have to
stop asking questions, okay?
424
00:20:11,041 --> 00:20:13,542
Jules! Seriously?
425
00:20:14,458 --> 00:20:16,834
They're having sex in the backyard.
426
00:20:23,166 --> 00:20:25,417
- Get back to bed.
- Come on!
427
00:20:28,125 --> 00:20:30,250
- Dad!
- Stan!
428
00:20:30,458 --> 00:20:32,125
{\an8}-Dad, help!
- Oh!
429
00:20:33,625 --> 00:20:35,959
{\an8}-Dad! Dad, help!
- Don't worry, buddy. Don't worry!
430
00:20:36,041 --> 00:20:37,208
{\an8}Daddy's coming!
431
00:20:37,792 --> 00:20:39,875
{\an8}-Dad!
- Stan?
432
00:20:40,166 --> 00:20:43,083
{\an8}- Stan!
- Dad, help!
433
00:20:44,250 --> 00:20:46,041
{\an8}-Daddy!
- Wait, what?
434
00:20:46,125 --> 00:20:47,208
{\an8}Dad...
435
00:20:48,959 --> 00:20:53,208
{\an8}Stan, no! No! No!
436
00:20:54,709 --> 00:20:56,750
{\an8}Oh, I believed in you, Stan!
33120
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