Original subtitles

HOME FOR CHRISTMAS 3

You ghosted the carpenter?

I didn't want to ghost the carpenter. Or I didn't mean to.

I wanted to have a, uh, beer with Bo. That's his name.

But then, I ran into Jonas, and after that, I--

- I'm sorry, you ran into Jonas? - Yeah.

We randomly ran into each other.

It's crazy that that's never happened before.

Okay... So you texted the carpenter,

then you ran into Jonas, and suddenly don't want that beer with Bo?

But I don't still have feelings or even want Jonas.

Of course it's always intense running into your ex out of nowhere, you know?

We had a very mature conversation, but after I felt really--

Really what?

That it's actually better that we split up, right?

But I guess I felt, um, a bit of...

It was a reminder of how much it hurt the last time.

Yeah. I'm not able to go through that again. I can't.

Like my pain quota's been all used up.

Okay. What are the carpenter's thoughts on it?

You ghosted him, girl!

Yeah, I did.

- Johanne, that just isn't cool. - I feel bad!

- What did he text you? - Well, he just wrote, uh...

"Sounds good." Uh, "I'll be down in a couple of hours."

Any smileys? Or emojis?

No, no emojis. The guy doesn't own a smartphone.

I mean, he, like, barely texts.

Okay. Yeah. So you have to decipher plain text.

Very 2001. Exciting.

Yeah, uh, "Sounds good."

That sounds more like something you'd text another guy.

You know, all, "Thumbs up, bro." Right?

I'm just telling you,

if my super hot employer invited me to grab a beer after work,

I'd be thinking, like...

"Hm. Yeah. That sounds pretty good."

Nah...

He said he'd be down in a couple hours. That's quick for a dude.

You call that quick?

Yeah, that's "giving romantic gesture."

That doesn't seem like a bad thing.

- Romance. - Romance? I'm not sure.

I don't know about that.

Oh. Oh yeah. What an awful dude.

He also texted, "Hey, um, where you at?"

That's not that weird.

Yeah, but was it upset or angry? Like, "Hey. Where are you at?"

Or is he like, uh, all sad panda face?

"Hey... Where you at?"

Yeah, or, "Hey... Where're you at?"

Um, any questions? Yes?

I need to know who got me for Secret Santa.

Well, you're not supposed to know who drew your name.

We all know I have trypophobia.

Then, someone gifts me a plant with thousands of tiny, little holes in it?

And then my anxiety was triggered. It was awful.

Did you open your gift already?

Obviously.

I mean, I have to ask, was it... was it supposed to be a... a joke?

I wasn't aware you were, uh, trypophobic.

So you did it?

It wasn't me.

But whoever did draw your name probably also wasn't aware of that.

Or it was a purposeful and intentional effort...

to really try to mess me up.

Yeah. I think it was clearly a rather deliberate, uh, effort on their part.

Um, it's unfortunate that happened, but, um,

I don't think anyone did it with malice or--

I feel like you're minimizing my trauma.

You forced this activity on us without any guidelines,

and when someone ridicules me for a very real phobia,

- you find it, uh, a little "unfortunate"? - Mm.

You know what, I'm sorry. Uh, it appears this has gone off the rails,

- so we can just cancel Secret Santa... - Yeah.

...if that's what you want.

- Yeah, I think so. - I called it, didn't I?

I said it'll cause trouble.

Why would we cancel it?

'Cause it's not fair to us who bought a gift but haven't gotten one.

God. I'm shocked how selfish you are.

You think I'm the selfish one?

Okay, uh, that's enough.

Why don't we take a breath and pause this whole conversation?

Shelve it.

We'll come back to it. All Secret Santa talk, uh, is postponed. Okay?

Why don't we get the day started?

I can still feel it in my bones. It was so scary.

My trypophobia's going wild right now.

Hey.

Boop.

- Hey. - Hi.

I owe you a huge apology, okay?

It's all right. Mm.

Yeah, but, uh...

It's not cool to judge people for falling in love.

Then why'd you do it?

Because I like you a lot, and I didn't want you getting hurt.

Well, love does that.

True.

Exactly.

Yeah.

You spoken to him yet?

No.

Okay, I just wanted to say I'm sorry for what I said to you.

Should've kept my mouth shut. Really.

You're free to do whatever you want.

Except, maybe use anywhere but the copy room when you wanna be intimate?

- You got it. - Yeah.

Okay.

- Hey. - Hey.

- Is this seat taken? - Hey.

I was just heading out. So...

- Hi. - Hey.

Johanne?

Hi there!

How ya been?

Good, good. Just waiting on a delivery. But it's running late.

Yeah. Just swung by to get some costume stuff for school.

Yesterday I was at The Hungry Moose, but you weren't there.

Yeah. Uh...

I had to run and take care of some stuff, and it was suddenly super late. Sorry.

I thought something might've happened to you, but...

But then I saw that you'd been home.

It's this dumb costume thing.

The Christmas play's tomorrow and they're far from done, so...

- Oh. - But I'm sorry.

I should've kept you posted.

So, my bad.

It's cool.

Looking forward to it?

Hm?

You excited for it? The Christmas play?

Uh... Nah.

Not excited about standing there

making a fool out of myself in front of a packed auditorium full of strangers.

I'm just a stand-in.

Kind of a stand-in in my own life, honestly.

But I'm fine.

It's not a big deal, really.

But you had a good time over at the Hungry Moose?

Yeah, yeah, that--

Yeah, I'm sure a night spent at your favorite pub's never a bad one.

It was, uh, it was fun.

It's a nice place.

- Lovely bartender too. - Yeah, Ingrid is pretty great.

Hm.

Okay.

I, uh...

- Yep. - See you later.

This mornin' I woke up with you

And kissed your cheek

...in '23

DECEMBER 16TH

When we were sittin' in silence

No one makin' a move

Writing words in a car park

While I'm falling for you

Yeah, we were years from together

And I wanted you then

If we'd stayed there forever

I would do it again

'Cause knowing you

Just knowing you

- Was the next best thing to loving you - Okay.

Just knowing you Was the next best thing to loving you

DON'T PANIC! THE DELIVERY HASN'T ARRIVED YET

I'LL PICK IT UP MYSELF. GOOD LUCK TONIGHT. BO

Oh! Thank you.

Wow!

Wow! It all looks so great!

No way!

You're a sight.

Folks need to know where to get their gløgg, am I right?

- You look great. - Thanks.

Mm. Yeah, it almost pains me to admit it, but Marianne's really outdone herself.

Yeah, it's not too shabby, eh?

Yeah, it's all Christmassy and magical.

- Just as it should be. - You been all right?

Oh, I've been great.

It's a lot to manage, but...

Well, it was super cool of you to step up for your sister.

Oh, thanks. That's really nice to hear, you know, from a Christmas ornament.

So, have you seen Marianne?

We're letting the audience in in half an hour.

- Has anyone seen Johanne? - Yeah.

So... Cool.

- Yeah. See you. - Cool.

Yeah. See you.

Yeah...

Whew! Twenty gnome costumes.

Cutting it close, aren't we?

Yeah. They, uh, turned out pretty well, if you ask me.

And this whole thing, it...

It's lovely. I really mean it. You did a great job here.

Are you saying that just 'cause I caught you with Adrian?

Huh? I was just, um, giving you a compliment.

Okay.

And the costumes, they look good.

Yeah.

I'll take them down to the dressing room for the little gnomes,

while you stay here and try yours on.

There's a large black bag hanging in there, so just throw that on.

- Okay? - Okay.

I'll be back in ten with all the children in tow.

- Yeah. - The teeth are on the makeup table.

Wait, there're teeth too?

Holy crap.

Okay, let's rehearse the recorders.

- Oh, shit. - Uh-uh. I don't want one word out of you.

- Okay. - Okay?

I really don't feel well.

You knock that off right now. Don't fuck around.

- I think it might've been something I ate. - Huh?

You're Santa, you can't be sick now!

Hello! Adrian?

Adrian?

Ugh. That's so gross.

Get it together, I'm serious!

We're letting the audience in now.

Marianne, we have a big problem. Adrian's throwing up.

- No. No. - Yes. Yes.

- There's no way. - It's happening right now!

- He's our Santa Claus. - Mm-hm.

- We need him to do the choreography... - Mm-hm.

...or the kids won't be able to keep it together.

Okay. I'll fix it.

Hi, nice to see you here.

Psst! Psst!

Morten! Morten, psst!

It's Johanne.

You look hideous!

- We need you to step in as Santa. - Huh?

Adrian's puking his guts out in the bathroom.

You've seen the rehearsals, so you basically know it--

No way. Absolutely not. I'm just here to watch the twins do their play.

I hate to break it to you, but life doesn't always go as planned.

Come on.

Are you serious right now?

Johanne, did you find a Santa?

Please, Morten?

I...

Who was that guy out there I saw you making eyes at?

Bo, my carpenter.

It's pretty crazy.

I've honestly been super mean to him, and yet he's out there anyway.

Is he here for you?

- I think so. - Hm.

So then, are you two a thing or what?

- Mm? - Mm?

I think so. I have special feeling.

You're in love.

No, stop it.

The boys have been so excited.

- Hi. - Hey.

Johanne?

Johanne? Say your line.

Mm.

Jesus Christ.

Hey.

Hey!

Congrats on surviving the Christmas play.

Yeah, thank you.

That went swimmingly.

- So were you supposed to, uh-- - Nope.

I wasn't.

Yeah.

I, um...

Yeah?

- You were saying? - No, you see--

No. Just say it. Come on. Spit it out.

No, you... You go first.

No, it... What were you gonna say?

Uh, well...

I don't really know how to tell you.

- This is a first for me. - Huh.

Um, okay.

Johanne... I've tried my best.

For a while now.

I'm so sorry, but your kitchen was misrouted.

It's in Sweden with all the Christmas chaos,

and no one knows where it is, and I'm sorry.

Yeah.

I know you wanted it ready before the holidays.

It, uh, was on me for thinking it could be done before then.

Not on you.

It... it was pretty stupid of me.

No, it was my fault.

I'm the one who couldn't keep my promise to you. You're not stupid.

Mm-mm.

You know what, I'll try one more thing.

I actually might know another guy who--

No, you know what, it doesn't matter anyway.

Uh, no one's had any faith in this project from the start, so...

Well, sorry to hear that.

You, uh, can enjoy your Christmas break.

- Mm-kay. - Yeah.

- There you are. - Hey.

I got totally lost backstage there.

Hey, there.

That costume's so creepy.

- Yeah. - Yeah. It was fun though.

- Thanks. - Yeah.

Yes.

Yes.

Well, uh, thanks for coming to support, but I should go get changed.

- Yeah she's right, we should probably go. - Yeah. No. We'll... we'll, uh... Yep.

Well, Merry Christmas, Johanne.

Yeah, you too.

Oh yeah, these were... These are for you.

- Merry Christmas. - Oh, thanks. That's nice.

- Gløgg? - Yes.

This is my personal brew.

Oh?

Did your day also suck?

I just feel like an idiot.

Oh.

Since the girls spend Christmas with Jeanette,

I compensate by going a bit overboard.

But can't you and Jeanette, uh...

celebrate together?

She's suggested that, but I...

I can't stand Ronny.

- Yeah... - He acts like he's their new dad,

and it drives me nuts.

Mm-hmm. Maybe a bit jealous?

No, it's more like, with him...

I don't get to be as good a dad as I want.

You're an incredible father, Trym.

And the best gløgg guy in the whole wide world.

This is definitely grown-up gløgg, I'll tell you that.

Thanks. It's dark rum.

Oh.

- We're leaving now. - Okay.

See you on Christmas Eve?

Uh...

It'd be really nice.

I'll drop off the gifts tomorrow.

Great. See you tomorrow.

And Johanne, that was Oscar-worthy.

- Got a good laugh out of it. - Shut up.

See you tomorrow, Papa.

- Pretty please? - Yeah.

Merry Christmas.

You too.

- This is so depressing. - Yeah.

I was gonna skip my work Christmas thing, but now...

I may go to The Hippo and join the party after all.

Did you say The Hippo? That's where your party is?

Uh-huh. It's a themed thing.

Everyone wears those ugly Christmas sweaters.

Unfortunately, I didn't bring anything to wear, so...

Well, that outfit'll knock it out of the park.

I don't know what's holding this Christmas ornament back from getting his party on,

but, uh, I know this rat wants to go to the Hippo and crash it.

- Then let's get our party on. - Yes! Okay!

Come on.

- Mm. Mm. - Mm? Mm.

Aah!

- Merry Christmas! - Hey, hey!

Merry Christmas!

- Ho, ho, ho! - Merry Christmas, Santa!

- Don't mind us! Hi! - Hey! Merry Christmas!

Hey!

- Hey. - Hey!

- This is Johanne! - Hi!

And these are my coworkers!

Hello, coworkers!

We're coming straight from the school Christmas show.

- How're you? How's it going? - Even better now!

- Skol! - Skol!

- Another? - Yeah!

- Two please! Same thing. - Two!

Don't tell Jeanette, but I agree with you 100%.

Ronny's such a lame-ass.

- He's so lame! - Yeah!

I'm well aware that Jeanette's already moved on.

I know that. I get it.

But does he have to be everywhere, all the time?

Why do people bringing their partners to everything? It's so weird!

Yeah, why did she even bring him?

They're not even his kids!

- No. - Am I the pathetic one here?

- No! - Yeah?

- No, no. No, no, no. - I'm not?

So, uh, I'm about to become a certified Gold Monk.

I haven't banged anybody in almost a year, it's so pathetic.

Well then, I... I'm a Platinum Monk.

- Platinum Monk? - Yeah.

Three whole years!

Holy crap.

Oh my God.

I read the signs all wrong.

- He has a girlfriend already-- - Huh?

- Huh? - What?

- My carpenter... - Yeah?

...already has a girlfriend.

But, um...

I don't get how you're a Platinum Monk, uh, Trym.

No?

You're actually a handsome guy.

You could have anyone you wanted. You're incredible.

You're a beautiful woman!

You're a beautiful woman!

No.

No?

This isn't how we fix things.

- It's not? - No.

Sorry, Trym.

No.

Ugh. Yeah.

I'm sorry.

You don't need to be... sorry.

Thoughts I've had lately

I took a wrong turn It made me feel like

It was so easy

Packed my things and my worries And left them behind

Aah-woo

Some call me crazy

Just because I spent my Christmas alone

I tell them maybe

And if I could I'd have the world on my own

Aah-woo

I pick my cards, call the shots And to me that's enough

Aah-woo

Yes, to me that's enough

All of these options A world without end

Live for the moments That doesn't make sense

I'll be the stranger Who opens your heart

And then...

I might never see you again

Sometimes I hate me

Some of my choices Have caught me off guard

Just like on New Year

Rushing home, watch the fireworks Flyin' between stars

Aah-woo

Put on a dress, booked a ticket

Then I called my mom

Aah-woo

Told her that I'm coming home

All of these options A world without end

Live for the moments That doesn't make sense

I'll be the stranger Who opens your heart

And then

We might never meet again

Among all these options I hold my own hand

Not always easy Sometimes I pretend