Original subtitles

(upbeat music)

(clock ticking)

(school bell ringing)

(upbeat music)

- Who are you?

- Melody.

Who are you?

You're old.

Has this started?

- What did you do?

- Nothing.

- [Madison] It wasn't nothing.

(orchestral music)

- [Melody] It wasn't a big deal.

- [Madison] Was so.

- [Melody] Was not.

- Was so.

- Was not.

- [Madison] Was so.

- [Melody] Was not.

- Was so.

- Was not.

- [Madison] Was so.

- [Melody] Was not.

- Was so.

- Was not.

- Oh wait, what the fuck is what?

- Madison, you're so full of it.

- You're full of it, Melody.

- Okay, stop.

What are we even talking about?

- We were besties, now we're not.

- That's because you said I was a loser wannabe.

- I did not say the term loser wannabe.

- Fine then, little bitch wannabe.

- Um, I did not say it,

I Snapchatted it to Amber, and I can't help if she

decided to screenshot it and share it with you.

With the world?

She group texted it to Marisa, Kim and Caylee,

who group Snapchatted it to Emily and Hayden.

Well I only said it because two weeks ago

I was like,

hey let's wear purple tumbler next Tuesday.

(upbeat music)

And then we did.

But then we were supposed to have lunch together,

and you were like hey I have to study for a quiz

with my tutor at lunch.

Then I checked your Instagram,

and you posted a video of you and Chloe eating together

in the quad.

You know I hate Chloe,

Chloe hates me.

(upbeat music)

hashtag best friends,

hashtag BFF forever,

hashtag heart emoji.

- [Madison] Chloe only hates you

because she thinks you hate her,

and you called her an unflawless legitimate loser.

- Well I do, and she is.

- Yeah, well then what happened?

- [Melody] Well then I tweeted,

I love when people lie to you

and think they can get away with it.

Angry face.

- Angry face, huh?

That is some intense shit.

So what did she do?

And how did she know that it was you?

- I tweeted I hope you're not implying something.

And because... duh.

- And then?

- Then I posted a picture on Instagram,

and Facebook,

of Trevor Washington.

- Trevor Washington?

Who's Trevor Washington?

- Only the boy she's had a crush on,

forever.

- Oh my god, that must've pissed you off.

- Not really,

anyway, she just thinks she's OFAF.

- So what did you do,

and what's OFAF?

- On fleek as fuck.

- Duh.

- What's on fleek?

- Better than on point.

- What's on point?

- Perfect.

- So more than perfect?

She thinks that she thinks,

that she is more perfect than the fuck.

- Congratulations,

welcome to the English language.

- [Madison] Uh, listen,

Chloe is like one of the nicest people on Earth,

so when we sat down for lunch,

she wanted to talk privately,

because, spoiler alert,

her parents are divorcing.

- I didn't know that.

- I was going to tell you

but you jump to conclusions,

and you know I've liked Trevor

since 5th grade.

(upbeat music)

- Well Emily told Hayden who told Hayley

that you told Chloe that you were over him,

so yeah.

- That's a lie.

And Melody, to be clear,

we were going to our pink casual,

not a purple tumblers,

because I said,

let's wear pink cas' on Wednesday.

(upbeat music)

- Wow!

This is like Rashomon.

So how did you guys end up here?

- Rasho what?

- Rashomon, it's a...

- Movie about different perspectives

and the subjectivity of truth.

A reflection not always having clear meanings

as stated by director Akira Kurosawa.

Oscar winner for the Best Foreign Film.

Yeah, got it already minute flicks,

catch up.

- Yeah catch up.

Anyways the reason we're in detention is

because when she posted that photo,

I kinda,

sorta maybe,

flipped out a little bit.

- Maybe, kinda, sorta.

You flipped legit girl.

- Oh shit.

- [Man with Glasses] Ladies,

this is not detention.

- It's not?

Shit.

- It's a support group

for people who exhibit poor behavior,

and they're trying to better themselves.

- So like, detention?

But not detention.

- [Harmony] Oh my god,

I just realized,

you're Melody.

I'm Harmony.

Melody and Harmony.

Welcome.

- Congratu-fuck-alations.

- (thumping music)

- Hey you little snot,

you haven't faced the shitstorm of life.

You haven't walked down the rabbit hole,

amiga.

So enjoy it, before you walk through that looking glass,

and meet your friend cellulite,

student debt,

asshole ex-boyfriends,

and not getting everything you want instant messaged to you.

(slow music)

Everything revolves around you now,

but just you wait.

The darkness of time, it's coming.

It comes for us all.

So for now I'm going to sit back and deposit this memory,

and once you sail that ship,

hit those hard knocks,

and land on the Plymouth rock of real life,

I'm gonna be there to greet you.

And cash in that check of satisfaction,

as I stare into your newly wrinkling eyes,

and you ask me if I want fries with that,

you little bitch.

- [Man With Glasses] Ladies,

ladies,

I think we're all on fleek here.

And OFAF legit.

And I think everybody here,

knows how rad and cool we can be,

so let's all be a bunch of cool little Indians,

and ninjas,

and get together,

calm it back, and just breathe.

I think,

and this is just me,

that we're all a little OFAF on fleek.

So let's bring it back down.

Cause we're all too legit

to quit here,

alright?

Let's just

AF the OF and OF the AF.

And that's just how I see it.

But that's just me.

And that's why I'm on fleek,

too.

(phone notification)

(typing sounds)

(tinkling music)

(typing sounds)

(orchestral music)

- What the hell just happened?

(upbeat music)