Original subtitles

- Are you kidding me?

-It's my piano. -And this is my arm, cockface!

-Where are you taking it? -Perth.

-Why? -I don't have a choice.

-I'm going to Perth, too. -What? No, you're not.

-Yeah, I am.

-What's the diagnosis? -It's a fractured radius.

- Oh no, it was Homebake you dick.

- No, it was South... -Are you that stupid?

-Dickbrain, it was Southbound Festival.

-We were supporting The Prodigy. -Just tell the fucking story.

-So we're all set up and we're announced,

and I'm just about to plug in and Toby's amp goes over

like the Twin Towers.

- Too soon.

-And all this beer just goes in the cables.

-...to the microphone to start singing,

and I get this electric shock in my fucking face.

-I actually saw a little lightning bolt.

-Toby reckons he saw--

-And the first noise that comes out of...

-On the microphone, in front of--

-Mother cunting Jesus shit fuck.

-Mother cunting Jesus shit fuck.

-That's what we thought we'd call our next album.

Mother fucking Jesus shit fuck. I think it'd be...

-Ah, guys, this is Suzie.

This is the guys. This is my little brother.

-Oh, Suzie! Primary school teacher Suzie?

Holy shit.

I think my brother's got a crush on you.

-That's convenient.

-Do you want a beer? -Sure.

-We have to go.

-So stoked you're here.

-I am also thrilled that you came.

-I am also thrilled that you came.

You're very welcome. Drink, drink, drink.

-Oh!

-You fucking fell asleep! Pull over!

-No. I'm awake, I'm awake.

-I'm fine. -Roo!

What the fuck?

-Pull the fuck over.

- Jesus, haven't you ever driven outside of the city?

It's like the one rule, you never swerve.

If you swerve for an animal, roll your car

and then you're fucked.

You're better off just hitting it.

Then again, when roos are about to be hit they jump,

so they end up coming through the windscreen

and then they kick you to death in a panic.

-But-- -No, you are goddamn kidding me!

-What? -We have to go to a doctor.

-Why?

-Because if we don't,

I might deliberately drive into an oncoming car

just to shut you up.

-Oh wonderful, great, yippee.

I always wanted to go on a holiday with a drug addict.

-I'm not a drug addict...

and this is not a holiday.

-Wahey, what are you doing? You're not driving.

-No, but...

- Now. Now. Change the...

-Second, not reverse! -I'm trying.

-Second! OK, yeah, that's fourth.

Oh my gosh.

Whoo!

OK, third.

-You are so...bad. -Just shut up.

- Oh, we're back in fourth.

-I know, I'm just... -Is this legit?

-You are freaking me out. Would you shut the...up.

- I'll leave fourth to you.

I know fourth's your favourite.

Aw...

Proud of you.

-Look at the road. Look at the friggin' road!

Not funny.

No, no, no. We're having a singalong,

it's not hip hop, you'll love it.

Oh my God, we are stopping!

-Oh, shit! -Why?

-It's a pink lake!

-We are not-- -Third, quick. Third.

- ...stopping. -Yes. Yes we are.

-Meg, we are not stopping.

-Hey, hey, hey, hey. No. -Holy shit!

-No. Meg! -This is amazing

-No, I'm not joking.

Hey, can you... Come back you little sh...

- Ow.

-Give me the-- -No.

-...the friggin' keys.

-Ow! I've got a busted arm you bully.

-Give me the fu...

You are such a child.

-Look at it.

Pink for miles.

What do you reckon makes it like that?

It's flamingo shit, I reckon.

Or is it like a breast cancer thing?

Do you feel better?

-Come on, you've seen it, let's go.

Look, must be the lake part.

Swim?

-Meg... We're going.

-What? To get your methadone?

-It's not methadone.

-Or the pills for your hair. You're going bald, you know.

Or it's that or you've got a massive forehead.

Maybe a bit of both.

-Look, I am going home to see my family

for the first time in years

and the prospect was giving me panic attacks. Alright?

So I went to a doctor and he gave me some pills

and then I lost my pills, largely, thanks to you.

So we're going to Port Augusta to get some more.

- I'm a very grown adult man. I'm doing the rules.

Oh, did you just give me the rude finger?

What are you, eight?

-I will leave without you! -It's my ute!

Is Port Augusta pink?

'Cause if it's not pink, we're not stopping.

That's the new rule.

- So tell me, what are your present symptoms?

- Um...sleeplessness, anxiety...

-Bitchiness, can't drive.

He hates pink lakes. Oh...

- It's OK.

You see! Now he's lost his mind.

You know, I have to tell you, I really don't like these.

These benzos, Xanax, Valium...

you become dependent.

- No, I'm only going to take them this week,

as soon as I get to Perth I'm going to stop.

-No you won't. I've been to Perth.

And if you're driving long distances, it's very bad.

-Yes, but I--

-I think maybe you should try this.

-Mindfulness?

Mindfulness?

-When you're feeling stressed,

you need a sensory inventory of your environment.

-A sensory...

-What you see and feel, what you hear.

-Meg! Can you just sit down.

Just...

Sorry.

Sensory inventory.

-May I have a look at your wrist, please?

-You want to sign it? -How did you do it?

-Swimming. -Playing netball.

-Do you mind if I have a moment alone with her?

-Why? -It's just for a minute.

It's kind of like a swimming and netball combo.

So it's exactly like netball, except in the pool.

You know, hoops at both ends, but you don't wear skirts.

Obviously.

-Did he hurt you?

-No.

-Is he your father?

-Why do you care?

I'm 16. I can hang out with whoever I like.

-Yeah, I'm--

-What are you gonna do?

Are you gonna call Family and Children Services?

-I'm just asking if you are OK.

Is that a Milky Bar?

-You want one?

-Yes, please.

Yes.

-OK.

-You're supposed to buy these for charity,

but today is your lucky day.

-Freebie. -Thank you.

Thank you so much.

You are a legend.

- Where the hell did swimming come from?

I thought you broke it playing netball?

-Well, I broke it in a car crash.

-Yes, but our story was netball.

You made me look like some kind of weird deranged--

-Well, you are pretty deranged.

-Yeah, well, you're a...

-Did...

Did you...

Wha... Can h...

-Yeah, anything to stop you being such a whiny little bitch.

-Come on, go, go, go, go, go.

- D-I-A...

-Mm-hm. -...Z-E-P-A-M.

-N? -No, M!

For moose fucker.

And it's five milligrams.

-What do I sign?

-Does this say Dr. Dick Cheese?

-Yep.

-You are relentless.

-Thanks. I don't know what that means.

-Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. No, no, no, no.

No, I've just got a quick script.

Please, it'll take you two minutes, honestly.

-Sorry. -What? No...

But it says open Sundays?

-Yep, only one in town.

People were a bit funny about it at first,

but it's been very popular.

-Yeah, but it's not is it?

-Not what? -It's not open.

-Yeah, but The Showdown.

So, obviously.

-You have got to be joking?

-I don't think she's joking.

- Back at 4.

-Do you like football?

..it's a goal!

-Hey!

- A critical goal for the Adelaide Crows.

He's got it!

What a mark!

-Promise I'll pay you back.

-...Saturday afternoon and...

The Dockers are down by four goals.

So I...

Well, I thought I'd send you a video.

Miracles happen.

- What are you doing? -Your boyfriend texted you.

-Don't touch that. -I'm just texting him back.

-No, it's not funny! Meg, Christ you're a pain.

-Give it to me.

-He seems like a dick.

-He's just...

He's... He's my brother.

-He's just your brother?

-Why haven't you been home in so long?

-I just never...

It was just never the right...

You're fucking kidding me!

-What the hell do you think you're doing you...

- Here you go, pal.

Pint of South Australia's finest.

-Thank you.

-No, thank you!

- Come on, move, move.

Tackle him!

Oh!

Our very own Billy Joel!

You're very gifted. Come on sit down, sit down.

Oh come on!

Come on, tackle him! Run!

I didn't know you were into football.

I knew about netball and swimming.

-No, we're just having lunch

and then we're gonna go straight back on the road.

-Oh. This is my wife, Armeena.

-Have some chips. The best in town.

-Aisha. -Hi.

-And this is Bob.

We're all very embarrassed.

He goes for the Pies. Totally ashamed.

How is that not high?

- Do you want to play pool?

- Yes. - Can I have some money?

- Yes. Yes. GO on, have fun.

-Tackle him, what are you doing?

You've got legs, run!

Go for the ball! Come on!

That's what I'm talking about.

- Oh!

That's Bob. Sorry about that, Mr Flynn.

Pies supporters, what are you gonna do?

Yes...

Run, run!

- You're so good!

-Don't look at the white ball,

look at the point you're trying to hit.

-Oh, sorry madam.

Aren't you girls a bit young to be in a pub?

-Aren't you pin dicks a bit old for dress ups?

-You white maggot!

-You need to come home.

-Saw you were empty there, Liberace!

-OK, thanks.

- Are you OK?

Lucky? Do you need some water?

-Maybe a water would be good.

-You seem very stressed.

-Yeah, I did mention that!

-Have you eaten today? Have some chips. Come on.

-I don't want any chips. Thank you.

-Ah, bloody hell, Bob.

-No, no, that's like a receipt, can I...

- He's in big trouble now...

Huge trouble.

This is not going to go down well with the fans.

-Does this say 'Dick Cheese'?

- Shot!

-You know this is illegal don't you?

Stealing a prescription.

-You know I have a duty of care

to everyone who comes to my clinic, you understand?

-Yeah.

-So how do I know you can look after that girl?

-Me look after...

You should be worried about me, mate!

She's...she's indestructible, dude.

-What the actual fuck?

-Just give me back my money.

-We saw you take it off the table.

-OK, yeah, like I'd seriously steal a dollar coin.

-I wouldn't know how to steal a prescription

even if it entered my head.

She took it. I don't even know how.

-I think she's an actual witch. -I'm not trying to argue...

-She's like a tiny little terminator.

-Mr Flynn, she's a teenager.

-She can't be expected to look after herself.

-Fuck you! -Ah! You little bitch!

-Hey!

-Mindfulness Mr Flynn. Mindfulness!

-Alright, Dwayne Johnson, out we go. This way.

-Come on. You little prick!

- Lucky!

Hurry up, dickhead!

-Go, go, go, go, go!

Jesus Christ, Meg, what the hell were you thinking?

-They ruined a perfectly good game of pool!

Oh my god. I've never punched anyone before.

-You call that a punch? Ha!

- Do you reckon they could have followed us?

-Dunno. Could have.

-What are you doing?

-Listening.

You can see what's coming if you know what you're listening for.

-Do you? -What?

-Know what you're listening for?

-Nup.

But it's warm.

-My mum's dying.

-You can hear that?

Captioned by Ai-Media ai-media.tv

for dear life