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Previously, on Young Sheldon...
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I've been corresponding
with Dr. John Sturgis
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00:00:04,285 --> 00:00:05,637
at East Texas Tech.
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00:00:05,640 --> 00:00:07,587
He said I could audit his course.
5
00:00:07,589 --> 00:00:09,522
Connie, I would like to see you again.
6
00:00:09,524 --> 00:00:11,557
Perhaps we could have dinner sometime.
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00:00:11,559 --> 00:00:13,693
Yes, we would love that.
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We would?
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If they get married,
we immediately double
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00:00:17,165 --> 00:00:19,365
the number of smart
people in our family.
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00:00:19,367 --> 00:00:21,606
Hello, Dr. Sturgis.
12
00:00:21,609 --> 00:00:22,702
Hello, Sheldon.
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00:00:22,704 --> 00:00:25,539
Can you see yourself living here? I can.
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00:00:30,545 --> 00:00:33,880
Mmm. Good ratio of hot
dog chunks to spaghetti.
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00:00:33,882 --> 00:00:36,684
I've been experimenting.
Glad you noticed. Kids!
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00:00:36,687 --> 00:00:38,754
Wash up for dinner!
17
00:00:38,764 --> 00:00:40,860
Now, who on earth is that?
18
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And don't be picking out all the chunks.
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Aw.
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00:00:50,898 --> 00:00:52,731
Sorry I'm a little late.
21
00:00:52,734 --> 00:00:56,169
My pant leg got stuck in the chain.
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Who are you?
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00:00:57,505 --> 00:00:59,572
I'm John Sturgis.
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Sheldon invited me to dinner.
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Aha.
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Okay. Um, come in, I guess.
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00:01:07,082 --> 00:01:08,442
Sheldon?
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Coming!
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00:01:09,984 --> 00:01:11,751
This is for you.
30
00:01:11,753 --> 00:01:14,989
It's cheese and summer sausages.
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00:01:14,992 --> 00:01:16,355
Thank you.
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00:01:16,357 --> 00:01:19,425
Summer sausage means it
doesn't need to be refrigerated.
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Is that so?
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It is.
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Okay. Sheldon?
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Dr. Sturgis, welcome.
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00:01:25,601 --> 00:01:26,934
Thank you, Sheldon.
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00:01:26,937 --> 00:01:29,063
Sheldon, you think you
might've let me know
39
00:01:29,066 --> 00:01:30,832
you invited company over for dinner?
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00:01:30,835 --> 00:01:33,473
I did think about it, but I
was afraid you might say no.
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Come see my train set.
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All right!
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00:02:01,437 --> 00:02:02,848
Good Lord.
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00:02:02,851 --> 00:02:05,071
You mean he just showed
up out of nowhere?
47
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Yep. He's out in the garage
playing trains with Sheldon.
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00:02:08,910 --> 00:02:10,143
Why's your hair wet?
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00:02:10,145 --> 00:02:12,545
If you must know, I was
doing my water aerobics,
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00:02:12,547 --> 00:02:14,180
and my swimming cap fell off.
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00:02:14,182 --> 00:02:16,449
This Sturgis fella
didn't say a word to you?
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If he did, do you think I
would have been doing frog kicks
53
00:02:18,786 --> 00:02:20,853
at the YMCA?
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00:02:20,855 --> 00:02:22,655
You look great.
55
00:02:25,727 --> 00:02:29,328
O gauge trains are definitely the best.
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00:02:29,330 --> 00:02:32,164
Oh, yes, they are.
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00:02:33,369 --> 00:02:35,767
Oh, well, what a pleasant surprise.
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00:02:35,770 --> 00:02:37,629
Oh, good. You're here, too.
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I am.
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00:02:39,135 --> 00:02:40,590
Are y'all about ready for dinner?
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I am.
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00:02:41,776 --> 00:02:43,643
Well, then, let's go.
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00:02:43,645 --> 00:02:45,311
Meemaw, you smell like chlorine.
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00:02:45,313 --> 00:02:47,656
- Why say it?
- Hmm.
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00:02:50,918 --> 00:02:52,417
You weren't kidding.
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00:02:52,420 --> 00:02:55,688
Spaghetti and hot dogs is delightful.
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00:02:55,690 --> 00:02:56,773
Even better
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00:02:56,776 --> 00:02:58,926
since Mom perfected the chunk ratio.
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00:02:58,929 --> 00:03:01,527
So, Dr. Sturgis, Sheldon tells us
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you're a guest professor
at the university.
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00:03:03,431 --> 00:03:04,648
- I am.
- Hmm.
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00:03:04,651 --> 00:03:06,852
Does that mean that you're
only here temporarily?
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00:03:06,855 --> 00:03:09,418
Well, that's the plan for now.
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00:03:09,421 --> 00:03:13,984
But I could be enticed to stay.
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00:03:15,031 --> 00:03:17,176
Meemaw, I do believe
there was subtext there.
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00:03:17,178 --> 00:03:18,444
Did you pick up on it?
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00:03:18,446 --> 00:03:19,679
Yeah.
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00:03:19,681 --> 00:03:22,081
Was I correct to infer
there was subtext there?
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00:03:22,083 --> 00:03:23,182
You were.
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00:03:23,184 --> 00:03:24,734
Okay, we're all good.
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00:03:26,354 --> 00:03:28,120
I can't believe they're
making me sit and eat
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00:03:28,122 --> 00:03:29,455
at the kiddie table.
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00:03:29,457 --> 00:03:30,718
It's better here.
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00:03:30,721 --> 00:03:31,820
How?
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We don't have to pray,
eat our vegetables,
86
00:03:33,795 --> 00:03:35,294
and we can curse.
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00:03:35,296 --> 00:03:37,096
Hmm. Maybe you're right.
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00:03:37,098 --> 00:03:39,281
Course I am, you ass-face.
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00:03:41,169 --> 00:03:42,820
Dr. Sturgis, do you think
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00:03:42,823 --> 00:03:44,604
we're ever going to unify gravity
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00:03:44,606 --> 00:03:47,176
with the other three fundamental forces?
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00:03:47,179 --> 00:03:49,921
I have a sticky note on my refrigerator
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00:03:49,924 --> 00:03:53,254
which reminds me every
day to do just that.
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00:03:53,257 --> 00:03:55,581
When did you decide
to focus your research
95
00:03:55,583 --> 00:03:56,816
- on quantum...
- Um, Sheldon, I think
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00:03:56,818 --> 00:03:59,218
you're kind of dominating
the conversation.
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00:03:59,220 --> 00:04:02,088
Why don't you let your
meemaw talk to Dr. Sturgis.
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00:04:02,757 --> 00:04:04,590
Oh, I'm sorry. By all means.
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00:04:04,592 --> 00:04:05,625
Thank you.
100
00:04:05,627 --> 00:04:08,427
- Connie?
- Yes, John.
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00:04:08,430 --> 00:04:12,566
Do you smell like chlorine on purpose?
102
00:04:15,070 --> 00:04:17,000
You sure I can't give you a ride home?
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00:04:17,003 --> 00:04:19,071
I can throw your bike in
the back of my pickup truck.
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00:04:19,073 --> 00:04:22,148
Thank you, no. I-I enjoy the night air.
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00:04:22,151 --> 00:04:23,183
Plus,
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00:04:23,186 --> 00:04:24,318
hot dogs and spaghetti
107
00:04:24,321 --> 00:04:26,077
is a highly caloric event
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00:04:26,080 --> 00:04:29,248
that demands an aerobic
effort on my part.
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00:04:29,250 --> 00:04:31,934
Well, it was a pleasure
spending the evening with you.
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00:04:31,937 --> 00:04:33,536
We should do it again sometime.
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00:04:33,539 --> 00:04:34,887
Great. When?
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00:04:34,889 --> 00:04:35,988
How about tomorrow?
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00:04:35,991 --> 00:04:38,059
You know what, we'll figure it out.
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00:04:38,062 --> 00:04:40,459
Come on, let me see you to your Schwinn.
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00:04:40,461 --> 00:04:41,861
Bye.
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00:04:41,863 --> 00:04:43,729
Good night.
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00:04:43,731 --> 00:04:46,198
Well, that was the
most stimulating dinner
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I've ever had in this house.
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00:04:47,835 --> 00:04:49,068
Glad you enjoyed it.
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00:04:49,070 --> 00:04:51,337
That man is a true role model.
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00:04:51,339 --> 00:04:53,839
Well, it's nice you finally
got a man you can look up to.
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00:04:53,841 --> 00:04:55,773
Oh, believe me, I know.
123
00:05:04,652 --> 00:05:06,719
You gonna keep it all bottled up,
124
00:05:06,721 --> 00:05:08,888
- or you want to talk about it?
- What?
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00:05:08,890 --> 00:05:10,589
I'm fine.
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00:05:10,591 --> 00:05:11,791
There's nothing to talk about.
127
00:05:11,793 --> 00:05:13,893
- You sure?
- Yeah.
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00:05:13,895 --> 00:05:15,661
Sweet dreams.
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00:05:22,403 --> 00:05:24,704
You know you want to talk about it.
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00:05:24,706 --> 00:05:26,138
You saw it.
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00:05:26,140 --> 00:05:28,474
My own son can't even
imagine me being a role model?
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00:05:28,476 --> 00:05:30,142
How am I supposed to be okay with that?
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00:05:30,144 --> 00:05:32,210
You're a role model for Georgie.
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00:05:32,213 --> 00:05:33,612
I used to be.
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00:05:33,615 --> 00:05:35,895
Now he wants to grow
up and be Tony Danza.
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00:05:35,898 --> 00:05:38,217
Did you forget you have a daughter
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00:05:38,219 --> 00:05:39,652
who would really benefit
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00:05:39,654 --> 00:05:42,121
from having a good man to look up to?
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00:05:42,123 --> 00:05:43,889
Oh, dear Lord.
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00:05:43,891 --> 00:05:45,796
You did forget.
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00:05:45,799 --> 00:05:47,593
I didn't forget. I just...
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00:05:47,595 --> 00:05:49,437
I don't know how to spend time with her.
143
00:05:49,440 --> 00:05:51,329
It ain't rocket science, George.
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00:05:51,332 --> 00:05:52,531
She's a little girl.
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00:05:52,533 --> 00:05:53,933
Ask her what she wants to do,
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00:05:53,935 --> 00:05:55,281
and then do it with her.
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00:05:55,284 --> 00:05:57,737
Oh, yeah. I suppose.
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00:05:57,739 --> 00:06:00,973
Trust me. She'll be thrilled
to spend some time with you.
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00:06:00,975 --> 00:06:02,408
Okay.
150
00:06:02,411 --> 00:06:04,289
Yeah, I'll give it a try.
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00:06:06,718 --> 00:06:09,682
Hey, when we do, you know,
whatever it is she likes to do,
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00:06:09,684 --> 00:06:10,950
you're gonna be there, right?
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00:06:10,952 --> 00:06:12,418
No.
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00:06:14,288 --> 00:06:16,021
Well, this just got harder.
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00:06:22,335 --> 00:06:24,764
Meemaw?
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00:06:24,766 --> 00:06:26,632
Meemaw!
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00:06:26,634 --> 00:06:28,200
What?
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00:06:28,202 --> 00:06:29,902
I've been researching things
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00:06:29,904 --> 00:06:32,004
that you and I can do with Dr. Sturgis.
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00:06:32,006 --> 00:06:33,156
There's a lecture tonight
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00:06:33,159 --> 00:06:34,672
at Rice University called
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00:06:34,675 --> 00:06:36,911
"What's happening at the
center of our galaxy."
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00:06:36,914 --> 00:06:38,411
Let me just stop you right there.
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00:06:38,413 --> 00:06:40,778
Don't worry. I know what's
happening at the center,
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00:06:40,781 --> 00:06:42,548
but I would never spoil it for you.
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00:06:42,550 --> 00:06:44,483
Look, I know you're invested
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00:06:44,485 --> 00:06:46,252
in me and John having a relationship,
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00:06:46,254 --> 00:06:47,820
and I'm not saying we won't.
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00:06:47,822 --> 00:06:50,990
But it ain't gonna happen
with you always underfoot.
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00:06:50,992 --> 00:06:52,491
Have I been underfoot?
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00:06:52,493 --> 00:06:56,934
Honey, in order for grown-ups
to get to know each other,
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00:06:56,937 --> 00:06:59,231
they need to have some alone time.
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00:06:59,233 --> 00:07:02,968
What if I'm around, but
I took a vow of silence?
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00:07:02,970 --> 00:07:04,804
Go home and have your breakfast.
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00:07:06,073 --> 00:07:08,674
And then she said for grown-ups
to get to know each other,
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00:07:08,676 --> 00:07:10,576
they have to have time alone.
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00:07:10,578 --> 00:07:12,678
Makes sense. What else?
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Apparently my being underfoot
isn't conducive to romance.
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00:07:16,417 --> 00:07:18,200
This is very helpful.
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00:07:18,203 --> 00:07:19,485
Thank you.
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00:07:19,487 --> 00:07:21,226
I'm at your service.
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00:07:26,502 --> 00:07:28,351
Oh, Celeste, why do you always
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00:07:28,354 --> 00:07:29,804
fall for bad boys?
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00:07:29,807 --> 00:07:31,007
Hey.
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00:07:31,010 --> 00:07:32,103
Hi, Dad.
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00:07:32,105 --> 00:07:33,572
What you doing?
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00:07:33,574 --> 00:07:35,040
Am I in trouble?
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00:07:35,042 --> 00:07:38,009
No, no. Just-just checking in on you.
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00:07:38,011 --> 00:07:39,110
Why?
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00:07:39,112 --> 00:07:42,447
'Cause you're my
daughter and I love you.
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00:07:42,449 --> 00:07:44,015
This is getting weird.
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00:07:44,017 --> 00:07:46,008
It is. I was just thinking that, uh,
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00:07:46,011 --> 00:07:47,479
you and me, you know,
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00:07:47,482 --> 00:07:49,342
we don't spend much time together.
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00:07:49,345 --> 00:07:51,222
You know, we should
find something to do,
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00:07:51,225 --> 00:07:52,682
just-just two of us.
197
00:07:52,685 --> 00:07:54,327
- Like what?
- You tell me.
198
00:07:54,330 --> 00:07:56,408
What-what sounds fun?
199
00:07:58,532 --> 00:08:00,198
I'd like to be taken to dinner.
200
00:08:00,200 --> 00:08:02,734
Great. Where?
201
00:08:02,736 --> 00:08:06,271
To the fanciest
restaurant in all of Texas.
202
00:08:06,273 --> 00:08:07,505
Which is...?
203
00:08:07,507 --> 00:08:11,109
Red Lobster, where the
surf meets the turf.
204
00:08:11,945 --> 00:08:13,479
You got it.
205
00:08:13,482 --> 00:08:14,778
Thanks, Dad.
206
00:08:14,781 --> 00:08:16,982
Mom, you got to take me shopping!
207
00:08:16,984 --> 00:08:19,417
I need a dress!
208
00:08:22,089 --> 00:08:23,755
Yeah?
209
00:08:23,757 --> 00:08:26,038
Connie, this is John Sturgis.
210
00:08:26,041 --> 00:08:27,559
Well, hello, John Sturgis.
211
00:08:27,561 --> 00:08:28,793
How are you?
212
00:08:28,795 --> 00:08:31,196
I chipped a tooth on a
peach pit this morning,
213
00:08:31,198 --> 00:08:33,531
but otherwise, I'm okay.
214
00:08:33,533 --> 00:08:35,190
Good. Good to hear it.
215
00:08:35,193 --> 00:08:36,593
Next order of business.
216
00:08:36,596 --> 00:08:39,214
I would like to have
dinner with you tonight,
217
00:08:39,217 --> 00:08:40,679
just the two of us.
218
00:08:40,682 --> 00:08:44,242
Oh, well, that sounds nice.
219
00:08:44,244 --> 00:08:45,877
What'd you have in mind?
220
00:08:45,879 --> 00:08:50,815
I'd like to come to your house
and cook you a Szechuan feast.
221
00:08:50,817 --> 00:08:52,317
I'm sorry, a what?
222
00:08:52,319 --> 00:08:53,451
Szechuan.
223
00:08:53,453 --> 00:08:56,569
It's a style of Chinese
cooking I learned
224
00:08:56,572 --> 00:08:58,490
when I was traveling through China.
225
00:08:58,492 --> 00:09:01,559
Well, wonderful. I would love that.
226
00:09:01,561 --> 00:09:03,628
Great. Do you have a wok?
227
00:09:03,630 --> 00:09:05,563
I do not.
228
00:09:05,565 --> 00:09:06,731
Not a problem.
229
00:09:06,733 --> 00:09:08,366
I have a travel wok.
230
00:09:09,202 --> 00:09:10,302
Okay.
231
00:09:10,304 --> 00:09:13,571
Uh, so, uh, what do you say about 6:00?
232
00:09:13,573 --> 00:09:14,806
It's a date.
233
00:09:14,808 --> 00:09:15,941
Terrific.
234
00:09:15,943 --> 00:09:19,744
Oh, and, um, let's not
mention this to Sheldon
235
00:09:19,746 --> 00:09:22,647
so as to keep him from being underfoot.
236
00:09:22,649 --> 00:09:25,050
Have you been talking to him?
237
00:09:25,052 --> 00:09:27,197
I have. See you later.
238
00:09:33,913 --> 00:09:36,804
Do I really need to get
dressed up to go to Red Lobster?
239
00:09:36,807 --> 00:09:38,563
You're getting dressed
up for your daughter.
240
00:09:38,565 --> 00:09:41,399
And that's a new shirt, so
be sure to ask for a bib.
241
00:09:41,401 --> 00:09:42,634
Oh!
242
00:09:45,738 --> 00:09:48,072
I'm ready.
243
00:09:48,075 --> 00:09:49,541
You're going to dinner wearing that?
244
00:09:49,543 --> 00:09:52,344
I think you mean she looks beautiful.
245
00:09:52,346 --> 00:09:54,846
You look beautiful.
246
00:09:54,848 --> 00:09:56,715
Why thank you, George.
247
00:09:56,717 --> 00:09:58,850
How 'bout we stick with "Dad" tonight?
248
00:09:58,852 --> 00:10:01,010
Okay, but you call me Melissa.
249
00:10:02,656 --> 00:10:04,460
After you, Melissa.
250
00:10:04,463 --> 00:10:06,591
Thanks, George.
251
00:10:28,447 --> 00:10:30,048
Oh, my.
252
00:10:30,050 --> 00:10:31,815
I know, I look like
253
00:10:31,818 --> 00:10:35,085
a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle.
254
00:10:35,088 --> 00:10:37,088
Well, come on in.
255
00:10:42,346 --> 00:10:44,421
Sheldon, come in the kitchen for dinner.
256
00:10:44,424 --> 00:10:46,698
- Can I eat out here?
- Why?
257
00:10:46,700 --> 00:10:49,701
Dr. Sturgis is having a
dinner date with Meemaw.
258
00:10:49,703 --> 00:10:50,902
I don't want to miss it.
259
00:10:50,904 --> 00:10:52,940
Fine.
260
00:10:54,808 --> 00:10:57,876
During that time, I
saw three cars drive by
261
00:10:57,878 --> 00:11:00,627
and a raccoon dragging a slice of pizza.
262
00:11:09,682 --> 00:11:12,116
Uh, table for two.
263
00:11:12,118 --> 00:11:13,851
No problem.
264
00:11:16,856 --> 00:11:18,089
Allow me.
265
00:11:18,091 --> 00:11:20,531
You are allowed.
266
00:11:23,396 --> 00:11:24,528
Thank you.
267
00:11:24,530 --> 00:11:27,398
Yes, thank you.
268
00:11:27,400 --> 00:11:30,101
If I may.
269
00:11:32,839 --> 00:11:34,572
So what do you think?
270
00:11:34,574 --> 00:11:38,109
I think we might be underdressed.
271
00:11:44,784 --> 00:11:48,119
The trick to a
successful Szechuan dinner
272
00:11:48,121 --> 00:11:50,020
is the Szechuan pepper.
273
00:11:50,022 --> 00:11:51,594
Okay.
274
00:11:51,597 --> 00:11:53,557
Now, you may notice
275
00:11:53,559 --> 00:11:56,026
your lips and tongue getting numb.
276
00:11:56,028 --> 00:11:58,262
Then why are we eating it?
277
00:11:58,264 --> 00:12:00,531
'Cause it's yummy.
278
00:12:00,533 --> 00:12:02,566
Sure.
279
00:12:02,568 --> 00:12:05,002
So, what were you doing
wandering around China?
280
00:12:05,004 --> 00:12:09,340
Well, when I'm not doing
research or teaching,
281
00:12:09,342 --> 00:12:12,943
I enjoy taking the path less traveled.
282
00:12:12,945 --> 00:12:15,546
I'm guessing it's a bike path.
283
00:12:15,548 --> 00:12:18,048
As a matter of fact, it was.
284
00:12:18,050 --> 00:12:20,751
Everybody in China rides bicycles.
285
00:12:20,753 --> 00:12:22,052
It's fantastic.
286
00:12:22,055 --> 00:12:24,622
- Did you see the Great Wall?
- I did.
287
00:12:24,624 --> 00:12:26,273
Interesting fact:
288
00:12:26,276 --> 00:12:28,333
it's filled with the dead bodies
289
00:12:28,336 --> 00:12:30,027
of the people who built it.
290
00:12:30,029 --> 00:12:31,859
You don't say.
291
00:12:31,862 --> 00:12:34,039
Hundreds of thousands of them.
292
00:12:34,042 --> 00:12:35,642
Here, taste.
293
00:12:39,471 --> 00:12:42,172
If it's just the two of us,
why can't I eat watching TV?
294
00:12:42,175 --> 00:12:44,375
'Cause you're having
dinner with your mother
295
00:12:44,377 --> 00:12:46,243
and it's a chance for us to talk.
296
00:12:46,245 --> 00:12:48,813
Sheldon's having dinner
and looking out the window.
297
00:12:48,815 --> 00:12:51,102
- Want me to have him join us?
- No.
298
00:12:51,105 --> 00:12:52,771
Then quit complaining.
299
00:12:54,799 --> 00:12:56,532
So what do you want to talk about?
300
00:12:56,535 --> 00:12:58,354
Um, I don't know.
301
00:12:58,357 --> 00:12:59,757
How's school?
302
00:12:59,759 --> 00:13:02,259
It's school, it's a turd fest.
303
00:13:02,261 --> 00:13:05,262
Charming.
304
00:13:05,264 --> 00:13:06,856
Are you dating anyone?
305
00:13:06,859 --> 00:13:09,333
Nah, nobody up to my standards.
306
00:13:09,335 --> 00:13:11,168
Sure.
307
00:13:11,170 --> 00:13:12,903
Can I ask you a question?
308
00:13:12,905 --> 00:13:15,139
Course, you can ask me anything.
309
00:13:15,141 --> 00:13:17,708
Were you pregnant with
me when you married Dad?
310
00:13:19,111 --> 00:13:21,846
Um... why would you ask that?
311
00:13:21,848 --> 00:13:23,172
Sheldon said so.
312
00:13:23,175 --> 00:13:24,381
How would Sheldon know?
313
00:13:24,383 --> 00:13:25,391
He did the math.
314
00:13:25,394 --> 00:13:26,391
What math?
315
00:13:26,394 --> 00:13:28,319
He said the time between my birthday
316
00:13:28,321 --> 00:13:30,633
and your wedding day was six months.
317
00:13:30,636 --> 00:13:33,536
Um... yeah.
318
00:13:33,539 --> 00:13:36,073
That's because you...
319
00:13:36,076 --> 00:13:38,310
were born premature.
320
00:13:38,313 --> 00:13:40,197
I've seen my birth certificate,
321
00:13:40,199 --> 00:13:42,132
it said I weighed nine pounds.
322
00:13:42,134 --> 00:13:44,468
Yes, that's true.
323
00:13:44,470 --> 00:13:48,119
You were a big fat preemie.
324
00:13:49,047 --> 00:13:50,696
Let's talk about something else.
325
00:13:50,699 --> 00:13:51,774
Why?
326
00:13:51,777 --> 00:13:53,710
'Cause I'd very much like to.
327
00:13:55,293 --> 00:13:56,970
And then Heather B said she didn't want
328
00:13:56,973 --> 00:13:59,171
to play tetherball
with Heather M anymore.
329
00:13:59,172 --> 00:14:00,915
Wait. Th-There's two Heathers?
330
00:14:00,918 --> 00:14:01,920
Oh, yeah.
331
00:14:01,923 --> 00:14:03,180
Which one's which?
332
00:14:03,183 --> 00:14:04,552
Heather B is stuck up.
333
00:14:04,555 --> 00:14:06,345
Heather M used to be stuck up,
334
00:14:06,348 --> 00:14:08,368
but then she got a scoliosis brace.
335
00:14:08,371 --> 00:14:10,227
Maybe she shouldn't
be playing tetherball.
336
00:14:10,229 --> 00:14:12,384
That's what Heather B said.
337
00:14:14,066 --> 00:14:15,673
This is delicious,
338
00:14:15,676 --> 00:14:18,869
but you were not
kidding about the spice.
339
00:14:18,871 --> 00:14:20,504
I'm about to break a sweat here.
340
00:14:20,506 --> 00:14:22,494
Well, here's something
341
00:14:22,497 --> 00:14:24,263
you might find interesting.
342
00:14:24,266 --> 00:14:27,960
Spicy food is typically
found in warmer climates
343
00:14:27,963 --> 00:14:30,047
because it induces sweating,
344
00:14:30,049 --> 00:14:32,538
which in turn, cools people off.
345
00:14:32,541 --> 00:14:35,019
So what does the runny nose do for me?
346
00:14:35,021 --> 00:14:37,688
It allows me to, uh,
347
00:14:37,690 --> 00:14:41,325
gallantly offer you my handkerchief.
348
00:14:41,327 --> 00:14:42,960
You are such a gentleman.
349
00:14:42,962 --> 00:14:44,061
When I was younger,
350
00:14:44,063 --> 00:14:46,463
I read a book on etiquette.
351
00:14:46,465 --> 00:14:47,619
That's how I know
352
00:14:47,622 --> 00:14:49,903
that if I ever have an
audience at the Vatican,
353
00:14:49,906 --> 00:14:53,036
I should wear evening
attire or a sack coat.
354
00:14:53,039 --> 00:14:55,973
I don't know what a sack coat is,
355
00:14:55,975 --> 00:14:59,777
but I'm sure you'd look handsome in it.
356
00:14:59,779 --> 00:15:01,861
Thank you.
357
00:15:04,697 --> 00:15:07,960
You know, it's a long
bike ride at night.
358
00:15:09,288 --> 00:15:11,322
If you want...
359
00:15:11,324 --> 00:15:13,857
you're welcome to stay.
360
00:15:13,859 --> 00:15:17,461
No, it's fine, I-I have
a headlight on my bicycle.
361
00:15:17,470 --> 00:15:19,627
Oh, sure, sure.
362
00:15:22,549 --> 00:15:24,515
Although, I hear it might rain.
363
00:15:24,518 --> 00:15:28,706
No worries. I have a pocket poncho.
364
00:15:28,708 --> 00:15:30,518
So you do.
365
00:15:32,044 --> 00:15:33,811
John.
366
00:15:33,813 --> 00:15:36,197
I'm inviting you
367
00:15:36,200 --> 00:15:38,901
to spend the night.
368
00:15:38,904 --> 00:15:40,236
Oh.
369
00:15:42,680 --> 00:15:44,330
No, thank you.
370
00:15:50,296 --> 00:15:52,229
Don't they make babies
that are born too soon
371
00:15:52,231 --> 00:15:53,530
stay in the hospital?
372
00:15:53,532 --> 00:15:57,432
Normally, yes, but you were born
373
00:15:57,435 --> 00:16:00,283
with such a great head full of hair
374
00:16:00,286 --> 00:16:02,085
that they sent you home with us.
375
00:16:03,376 --> 00:16:06,076
That's the first thing
you've said that makes sense.
376
00:16:07,178 --> 00:16:09,278
I'm glad we had dinner, this was nice.
377
00:16:09,281 --> 00:16:11,882
Yeah, fun stuff.
378
00:16:11,884 --> 00:16:14,643
Well, don't want to miss Who's The Boss.
379
00:16:18,691 --> 00:16:21,058
Lord, forgive me for lying.
380
00:16:21,060 --> 00:16:22,860
I'll tell him the truth
when he's 30. Amen.
381
00:16:24,697 --> 00:16:26,463
Your lobster, madam.
382
00:16:26,466 --> 00:16:28,150
Thank you.
383
00:16:30,760 --> 00:16:33,003
Would you like me to open it for her?
384
00:16:33,005 --> 00:16:34,538
Oh, I got it, thanks.
385
00:16:36,768 --> 00:16:39,777
- You all right?
- This thing's freaking me out.
386
00:16:39,779 --> 00:16:41,713
Here, let me help you with that.
387
00:16:43,244 --> 00:16:46,650
Here. Okay.
388
00:16:46,652 --> 00:16:49,086
The trick is not to make eye contact.
389
00:16:49,088 --> 00:16:50,400
Tell him.
390
00:16:50,403 --> 00:16:51,869
Here.
391
00:16:51,879 --> 00:16:55,453
All right, now, we just... snap her off
392
00:16:55,456 --> 00:16:58,161
like that... pop.
393
00:16:58,164 --> 00:17:00,424
Grab this guy here,
394
00:17:00,427 --> 00:17:02,326
and we crack the claw.
395
00:17:02,329 --> 00:17:06,065
And then you take out a little meat...
396
00:17:06,068 --> 00:17:08,234
dunk it in some butter,
397
00:17:08,237 --> 00:17:10,237
and then you eat it.
398
00:17:12,411 --> 00:17:13,838
Holy moly.
399
00:17:13,841 --> 00:17:15,001
It's good, huh?
400
00:17:15,004 --> 00:17:16,322
Unbelievable.
401
00:17:16,325 --> 00:17:17,838
I'll leave you to it.
402
00:17:19,263 --> 00:17:21,393
No. Sit with me.
403
00:17:23,522 --> 00:17:25,055
Okay.
404
00:17:27,593 --> 00:17:30,794
When I grow up, I'm gonna
eat lobster every night.
405
00:17:30,796 --> 00:17:33,730
Well, hon, you better stay in
school and get a good education.
406
00:17:33,732 --> 00:17:36,667
I was thinking I'd
just marry a rich guy.
407
00:17:36,669 --> 00:17:39,570
Sure, that's a way to go.
408
00:17:39,572 --> 00:17:41,877
Or a guy who works at Red Lobster.
409
00:17:41,880 --> 00:17:43,980
That's another way to go.
410
00:17:56,156 --> 00:17:58,950
You seem quiet. Is everything okay?
411
00:17:58,953 --> 00:18:01,670
Are you not interested in me?
412
00:18:01,672 --> 00:18:04,187
Of course I am. I'm very interested.
413
00:18:04,190 --> 00:18:06,190
Then how come when I...
414
00:18:06,193 --> 00:18:09,979
I invited you to spend
the night, I got rejected?
415
00:18:09,981 --> 00:18:12,014
I did do that, didn't I?
416
00:18:12,016 --> 00:18:14,150
Good Lord, yes.
417
00:18:14,152 --> 00:18:15,818
I can explain.
418
00:18:15,820 --> 00:18:17,153
Please do.
419
00:18:17,155 --> 00:18:20,848
I didn't want you to
think that I would think
420
00:18:20,851 --> 00:18:22,491
that you were the sort of woman
421
00:18:22,493 --> 00:18:24,101
who would engage in coitus
422
00:18:24,104 --> 00:18:26,628
simply because I cooked
you a Szechuan dinner.
423
00:18:26,631 --> 00:18:28,697
It was better before you explained.
424
00:18:28,699 --> 00:18:32,668
All right, let me try a different tack.
425
00:18:35,406 --> 00:18:36,656
Connie.
426
00:18:36,659 --> 00:18:37,892
Oh, boy.
427
00:18:37,898 --> 00:18:39,763
Would you honor me with an evening
428
00:18:39,766 --> 00:18:42,978
of intimate relations?
429
00:18:42,981 --> 00:18:45,203
Well, that is a different tack.
430
00:19:05,445 --> 00:19:07,369
This is very promising.
431
00:19:07,371 --> 00:19:08,971
What's happening?
432
00:19:08,973 --> 00:19:11,640
Dr. Sturgis's bike is still at Meemaw's.
433
00:19:11,643 --> 00:19:12,742
So?
434
00:19:12,745 --> 00:19:15,031
That means he probably is, too.
435
00:19:15,034 --> 00:19:17,412
You need to get a life.
436
00:19:17,415 --> 00:19:19,148
There he is.
437
00:19:26,357 --> 00:19:28,921
Mom, Mom, Mom.
438
00:19:28,924 --> 00:19:30,490
- What's wrong?
- What's going on?
439
00:19:30,493 --> 00:19:33,328
Dr. Sturgis and Meemaw
had their first sleepover.
440
00:19:33,331 --> 00:19:35,431
It's a big step in their relationship.
441
00:19:35,433 --> 00:19:37,766
I'm going to go congratulate them.
442
00:19:37,768 --> 00:19:40,102
Hey, put on a jacket, it's chilly out.
443
00:19:40,104 --> 00:19:41,578
Will do!
444
00:19:41,581 --> 00:19:43,343
Or try saying he can't go.
445
00:19:43,346 --> 00:19:45,406
Oh, never mind, you can't go!
446
00:19:45,409 --> 00:19:47,465
The last thing I heard was jacket!
447
00:19:47,468 --> 00:19:49,351
Oh.
448
00:19:49,354 --> 00:19:54,360
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