Original subtitles

I read that the male seahorse

actually gets pregnant and gives birth.

Just think about that.

One day, he's out in a coral reef

lookin' for some curly tail, thinking he's a man.

Next thing you know,

his boys are all talking about, "Let's go out!"

He's like, "Nah, I got knocked up, my dude,

but you could you bring me some algae?"

No, I respect the little sea horse

for being a great dad, but at the same time,

he's a punk for making us all look bad.

Um, Tray?

Do we need to have another convo

about you being on your phone at work?

I was just seeing what time it is.

Oh, okay. I'll tell you what time it is.

It's work time, and employees on cellphones

is against Grundle's policy, as you well know.

Okay, let me just... Let me...

Okay, phone away. Please and thank you.

Thanks.

Go ahead.

Give me a reason.

You the boss.

Yeah, hi, I'm in a little bit of a rush.

Can I get a half-caff, no foam,

mocha latte with sugar and an extra shot of espresso,

please, but split into two cups?

Aah!

Synced and corrected by louvette www.addic7ed.com

Them kids look just like me, man.

No question.

You know, she can't keep you from seeing the kids.

That ain't right.

I lost custody of my kids last time I got arrested.

What'd you get arrested for?

Beating my kids.

Oh! Oh, oh, oh, oh!

Hey, what y'all in here talkin' about?

All the ways you [BLEEP] up your lives?

Sounded like a long conversation.

Tray just found out he got kids,

but his ex won't let him see them.

Oh, Lord.

Another generation of fatherless children

being turned loose on the world.

The cycle continues.

I'm trying to be a part of their life,

but unfortunately, it's not up to me.

Yeah. I bet your pops said the same thing, huh?

That's why you a ex-convict

sitting in a halfway house right now.

Yo, that cycle shit is real.

I can track when my life went from run-of-the-mill [BLEEP] up

to truly [BLEEP] up when my old man left.

My pops took a job as a department-store Santa

just 'cause he didn't wanna spend Christmas with us.

Yep, yep. My pops was incarcerated, too,

and it was all downhill from there.

That's why I'm all, "Yo, [BLEEP] absent fathers, B."

Wait a minute.

Y'all really think that y'all ended up in jail

'cause you didn't have a pops?

Nah, I ended up in jail 'cause my lawyer

was a bag of shit. He didn't object.

Anybody that watches "Law & Order" knows

you supposed to object.

This nigga didn't object not one time!

This is good, guys.

We are making progress here.

See, y'all are recognizing that you ain't shit

and that you ain't gonna be shit.

That's why you're doomed to a life of failure, man.

Without that father-son relationship,

you're always tryin' to feel love,

that father-size hole left in your convict hearts.

Okay. Come on, let's loosen it up a little bit.

Let's lighten up. How about a little prop comedy?

Anybody got some, uh, prop for me I can use?

Any prop I can... Uh, Barker, where you going?

You gonna miss this prop comedy?

Don't leave! I'll tell...

You gonna be on bathroom duty the rest of the week!

Damn dicklicker.

What the...

Damn. I thought you'd never get home.

Come and get some of these ice creams out of my hands.

This shit is drippin' all over the place.

What are you doing here, Tray?

Don't take this strawberry. That's my flavor.

Take the chocolate moose tracks.

- Moose tracks? - Moose tracks.

You know you like a little chocolate swirl

in your vanilla, Josh.

Oh, that's funny. That's... That's very funny.

- Mm-hmm. - Hey, listen, Tray. You need to leave.

You know you can't be here.

I'm just bringin' the kids some ice-cream cones, man.

Is that so wrong?

You really wanna keep ice cream from the kids?

What kind of man are you, Josh?

No, I'm trying to keep the kids away from you,

and they're not even here anyway.

It's the middle of the school day, so...

Me and you bumped heads,

but if you stay in your lane,

we gonna be all right.

Stay in my lane?

This is my lane. This is my house!

- How long you lived here? - You didn't...

- Nine years. - Mm-hmm?

- Nine? - Nine.

- Rented or homeowner? - Homeowner.

Mm-hmm.

Good neighborhood, right?

Uh, yeah. It's the best.

Yeah, you know this neighborhood used to be [BLEEP] up?

- Thank you. - Good... Good public school?

No. Actually, no.

But it doesn't matter

'cause we send the kids to private school.

- Private school... - Yeah.

I hope it's a good private school.

Yeah, the Rothman School...

It's the best school in Brooklyn.

- Right, right. - It's very diverse.

It's got a good science program, which is important.

Right. Hold on to this one.

Dig on that. Dig on it.

- Yeah. I will. - Okay.

I wanna... I wanna thank you.

- Okay. - Okay?

- Yeah. - My man.

Great.

Oh, no.

No, Tray!

No, no, no!

Tray, come back here!

Tray!

Dr. Caruso is so stupid.

Doesn't she have a PhD

in, like, astrophysics or something?

Yeah, and she's stupid.

Um...

Is that...?

Oh... my God.

What do we do?

What do you think?

Hi, kids. I-I'm Tray Barker,

and this is my associate, Cousin Bobby,

and I'm a friend of your mom's.

And she told me to come walk you home.

Wait, no, no, no.

You're the guy from the art gallery.

Yeah, she told us to stay away from you.

You know why your moms told you that?

Because you're our biological father.

- You knew that already? - It's obvious.

She wouldn't let us talk to you.

She wouldn't let us ask any questions about you.

And you look just like Shahzad.

What?!

I don't look like that.

Nah, so, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

Yeah, same nose...

Yeah, you lookin' at your future, son.

It's pretty bleak.

Listen, your mom has created a boundary

that I'm gonna be very respectful of.

I'm gonna interpret that as like a two-foot safety area.

What makes you think

you can just have a relationship with us now?

Just walk with me. Give me a chance.

If we go with you,

then you have to answer every question we have.

But... Mom said...

Stop being such a bitch, Shahzad.

Yo! She's got you, son.

- Bobby, Bobby, Bobby. - Like stop...

Bobby. Not now.

I'll answer what I can.

Answer everything or no deal.

Ooh, little mama's a boss, son.

- Of course. That's my daughter. - Yeah, word.

No. No, no, no, no. Unh-unh.

None of that "daughter" shit. You need to earn that.

Listen, I want... I wanna earn it.

Let me... Let me take you kids on a truth safari.

Are we going, son?

We going?

Oh, shit, son. We going?!

We going on a truth safari, son?!

Yo. Pull up the skirt. Come on, son.

Come... Come on, baby.

This is what it's about.

We going back to the Mecca. Come on!

This is a bad idea.

"So, when you think of Myanmar,"

don't think of hateful, hard-line Buddhists

or the fourth 'Rambo' movie.

"Think of delectable deep-dish pizza."

Jesus Christ, no, Josh.

No.

- Hey, baby. - Hey.

How was your day?

It was good.

It was... normal.

The same.

Tray came by today.

How was your day?

Are you serious?

He came to the house?

Yeah, I was...

I saw him when I was coming in from my bike ride.

And?

He... That's it.

Quick exchange.

Uh... he took off.

So you spoke to him?

Well, yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, I mean, it was...

It was definitely more cordial than the last time I saw him.

He's... He's actually got a pretty decent energy to him.

And what did you talk about?

I don't... Uh...

He was, like...

He... He was asking about the kids and stuff.

He asked about the kids?

And what did you tell him?

Nothing. Nothing. Nothing.

He was like, "Where... Are the kids home?"

I said, "Obviously not. They're at school."

You told him they were at school?

No, I... No.

I said, "They're not here right now.

They're at school. Sorry."

Josh, tell me you didn't tell him

what school they go to.

He asked, and I wasn't thinking and it...

Damn it, Josh!

But... Where are you going?

I'm tracking Amira's phone.

They're with him. I know it.

What? Let's not jump to conclusions.

It... He doesn't ha...

Shit. Wait up!

This is where it all started.

Isn't Jay-Z from around here?

And Barbra Streisand.

She from Flatbush, dumbass.

Me and your moms is from here.

So, how'd you meet?

Fight broke out right here

between this fat dude and a skinny dude.

I mean, this fat dude was wearin' the skinny dude out!

And me and your mom was right there watchin' it.

It was hilarious, and that's when it happened.

That's when you talked to Mom?

Nah.

That's when Crazy Mike broke up a fight holdin' a baby.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!

It was legendary.

It had never been done before.

No one ever broke up a fight holdin' a baby.

He is to never be forgotten, okay?

Never. Happened right there.

Word.

- Mike, Mike! - Mike, baby!

You will never be forgotten.

Ever, baby!

The next day, I saw her sittin' right there.

I was like,

"How about Crazy Mike breakin' up that fight holdin' a baby?"

We was cool after that.

I've called Amira five times,

and she's not answering the phone.

No, no, no, no, no!

She just disappeared off the map!

No, she probably turned off her phone.

Okay?

They're fine. I'm sure they're fine.

I don't want it to be fine.

I want to take a nutcracker...

- Okay. - ...to their felon-ass,

crack-dealin' biological father's dick!

- Whoa! - Damn!

Okay, you wanna take a nutcracker to his dick?

- The... - Don't try to analyze my rage right now.

Okay, well, don't take it out on me. Thank you.

But you're the one who told him what school they go to.

That is not... That's a true statement.

Yes. But what about you?

You made babies with Stringer Bell!

- Oh... - Excuse me?

We'd love it if we could have some privacy, please.

I-I wasn't listening to you.

Yes, you was. Guess what...

Don't [BLEEP] around and get a one-star rating.

Oh, word?

I'll go back and give you a one-star rating!

No... Did you just hear this shit?

Hey, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, hey, hey.

- Did you just hear this shit? - Hey!

Nobody has to give out any one-star ratings

or anything like that. Let's all take a breath, okay?

- Take it down notch. - You're right. You're right.

I'm sorry, Mr. Lyft driver.

Yeah, I'm sorry, too.

Five stars?

I have a question.

If you and Mom had such a good relationship,

how come she wants nothing to do with you?

'Cause she's mad 'cause I went to prison.

Oh, man. What'd you do?

I was busted for selling crack cocaine.

Were you, like, on drugs then?

Wasn't on drugs.

I would sell drugs.

Wait, wait. Did Mom sell crack, too?

- Nope, never. - Well, she at least

weighed it and bagged it, right?

Bobby! No, she never did that.

Wait, wait, wait.

Okay, what did Mom do?

Okay, every now and then, she would, like, draw hearts

and unicorns on the shit on the baggies, you know,

just to make it look nice, but that's it.

She never did nothing else.

So, she knew?

I mean, it's not like

she's completely free of blame or anything.

Eh...

Let me tell you something, Amira...

Life was different then.

I mean, we didn't have any opportunities.

We had to create our own.

So, you guys had, like, a legit relationship.

Of course.

Me and your mother had a proper Brooklyn love story.

I remember one time...

I remember one time

she threw a brick through a cop-car windshield.

She threw a brick?!

Threw a brick through the windshield, yeah.

- Why? - 'Cause she loved me.

One time, she said,

"I'll do anything for you, Tray."

I said, "You won't throw no brick

through no cop-car windshield."

And she threw the brick,

and I said, "Shay, you [BLEEP] crazy!"

And then she turned around and said,

"[BLEEP] the police, Tray!"

Your moms.

Yeah, yeah.

Wow, so she really loved you.

Yes, she did. She really...

I wish my parents loved each other.

My father left to get a Ja Rule CD and never came back.

Bobby!

Let me bond with the kids. Please step back.

- F-For real? - Just step back. Please.

I'ma fall back.

I'm fallin' back, son.

I think it's time for me to take y'all back

to where y'all come from.

Let's roll. Come on.

Come on.

Let's go.

Can I go?

Bobby, come on.

All right!

Let's roll.

Like we a family! You know what I'm sayin'?

Me and Tray, we like brothers.

You like...

- you know what I'm sayin'? - Nah.

This is where the trail went cold.

What are you doing, Tray?

I never realized you lived so close.

I mean, this place isn't that bad.

There's like two Starbucks right down there.

You made it sound like it was the ghetto or something.

I never said it was the ghetto.

That's your words.

I think you did.

This place... wasn't that bad.

Just a little rough around the edges.

Actually, it brings back a lot of memories.

Hey.

Get the [BLEEP] back before I knock your ass out, bitch!

Just askin' if you had a moment

to save the polar ice caps.

Oh, my... Oh, my God.

I am so sorry.

You shouldn't roll up on people like that here.

There you go.

Peace be with you.

Amira! Shahzad!

Don't even try it.

They with Tray

on some [BLEEP] up trip down memory lane.

What, you think they're gonna be scared of him?

Worse.

I think they're gonna like him.

Over there is where my grandmother's buried.

Her name was Nan.

Up there is where my Uncle Marvin was buried.

He gave me my first sip of beer.

Yeah, my brother Clyde, about a hundred feet that way.

And he got popped in '03.

Left me to fend for myself.

Yeah, about the same age as you.

So...

you... you brought us here to show us

a bunch of dead people's graves.

Hell, no.

I brought you here to show you where you was conceived.

You see that big-ass tree right there

with the low-hanging branches?

That's where me and your mother made you.

That's where the magic happened

with me and your mother.

That's where she pulled the rabbit out of the hat.

Voila.

I can't believe y'all had sex in a cemetery.

I'ma tell you something, Amira.

The cemetery is like the ghetto itself...

Full of sadness and death,

but it's also full of life.

Uh, I feel nauseous.

Zad! Amira!

I got this. Wait a minute.

Hey! You ain't gonna be running up...

Shay!

Tray, you next! I'm about to light your ass up!

- Shay, Shay! - Mom, Mom, it's fine!

He was just showing us some stuff from back in the day.

You were wild.

I can't believe the stuff you used to do outside.

You had no right to do this!

These are my kids, too, Shay!

I'm trying to make up for lost time!

You are not welcome to barge into our lives!

Not after what you did!

What did I do? I made mistakes.

I paid for my mistakes. I did my time.

That should mean something.

Those were your choices.

You chose not to rat on Wavy,

and you missed out on your kids' lives because of it.

I didn't even know I had kids!

You never told me!

You never told me!

Tray. You done crossed the line.

This is the last straw for me.

- Look, Mom, he was... - You hush!

If you ever pull one of these shenanigans again,

I swear to God, I will call the cops on you

and have them drag you back to jail.

Try me. See if I don't do it.

You'll call the cops on me, Shay?

Sure will. We done here.

You hear me? Done.

Come on.

Come on!

Don't come around us anymore.

- Bobby. - Hmm?

- Come on. - Uh, what happened?

- Come on. - What happened? I took a nap.

I'm... I'm good.

All we did... Was take a nap.

- Yep. Who... - Come on.

It's you. It's you.

That's not me! Are you kidding?

That's me?

I know I have a big head, but not that big.

Okay, so a man with buttons.

- It's not a man with a button. - Okay, it's a man in a suit.

What if I give you this? No, not a man in a suit.

Okay, that's a man who has a really bad haircut.

- No, that's not a man with a bad... - He's wearing a beret.

Look at it! It... Uh, it's a person!

There's only one thing that it could be.

It's a person!

A human? A human being.

- No. It's a gingerbread man. - A gingerbread man?

- It's a ginger... - Oh! I don't even eat gingerbread.

- You don't eat gingerbread? - No.

Well, that's sad. That's a sad, sad thing.

Okay, who's next?

Who's next? So sad.

You don't eat gingerbread.

Gingerbread!

I-I'm sorry.

Okay, and start!

Box.

Rectangle!

Oh!

- Brick! - Yeah!

Whoo!

Wait, brick? That's how you explain "brick,"

by throwing it through the windshield of a car?

A cop car, yeah.

A cop car? Oh, wow.

Shannon?

the police.

- Come on. My turn. Let's go. - All right.

- Let's go. - Let's go.

Let's get it back.

- All right. - We need a win.

I can't believe you drew this.

- You ready for this? - You really drew this?

Yeah.

Yeah, go ahead.

Clean that good, real good.

Make sure you get all up under there.

You know what? You got to remember...

Barker, you brought this on yourself.

You brought it on yourself!

You your own worst enemy, man.

You are!

This is truly a metaphor for you life...

You with your face down in the shitter.

It'd be funny if it wasn't so goddamn sad!

Synced and corrected by louvette www.addic7ed.com