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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:07:11,650 --> 00:07:13,499 Ciao, Rome! 2 00:07:15,799 --> 00:07:17,249 Ciao, world! 3 00:07:21,999 --> 00:07:23,199 Ciao! 4 00:07:33,248 --> 00:07:35,348 What have we forgotten? 5 00:07:38,148 --> 00:07:41,047 What have we forgotten? 6 00:07:43,797 --> 00:07:46,297 We have forgotten you! 7 00:07:55,946 --> 00:07:57,896 Let me be very clear: 8 00:07:59,496 --> 00:08:02,646 I'm here for one very simple reason. 9 00:08:04,046 --> 00:08:07,695 To not forget anyone. 10 00:08:08,645 --> 00:08:11,845 God does not leave anyone behind. 11 00:08:12,845 --> 00:08:16,845 That is what He told me when I decided to serve Him. 12 00:08:16,895 --> 00:08:19,645 And it is what I say to you now. 13 00:08:20,944 --> 00:08:25,744 I serve God. I serve you! 14 00:08:31,944 --> 00:08:36,993 We've forgotten the women and children, 15 00:08:37,043 --> 00:08:41,743 who will change this world with their love and their kindness. 16 00:08:41,793 --> 00:08:47,043 And with their marvelous, divine disposition to play. 17 00:08:50,042 --> 00:08:53,492 Play is the only authentic means we have 18 00:08:53,542 --> 00:08:57,042 to make us feel in harmony with life. 19 00:08:58,742 --> 00:09:04,691 And to be in harmony with God we have to be in harmony with life. 20 00:09:05,941 --> 00:09:07,691 We don't have a choice: 21 00:09:08,441 --> 00:09:12,291 we must be in harmony with God! 22 00:09:19,490 --> 00:09:22,240 And what else have we forgotten? 23 00:09:30,039 --> 00:09:32,839 We have forgotten to masturbate, 24 00:09:35,339 --> 00:09:38,039 to use contraceptives, 25 00:09:40,939 --> 00:09:42,789 to get abortions, 26 00:09:42,839 --> 00:09:45,988 to celebrate gay marriages, 27 00:09:46,638 --> 00:09:48,988 to allow priests to love each other, 28 00:09:49,038 --> 00:09:51,388 and even to get married. 29 00:09:52,538 --> 00:09:57,437 We've forgotten that we can decide to die if you detest living, 30 00:09:57,487 --> 00:10:00,637 we've forgotten to have sexual relations 31 00:10:00,687 --> 00:10:06,037 for purposes other than procreation without feeling guilty! 32 00:10:07,787 --> 00:10:08,887 Help! 33 00:10:08,937 --> 00:10:13,736 To divorce, to let nuns say mass, 34 00:10:13,786 --> 00:10:17,536 to make babies in all the ways science has discovered 35 00:10:17,586 --> 00:10:20,386 and will continue to discover. 36 00:10:20,436 --> 00:10:24,586 In short, my dear, dear children, 37 00:10:25,535 --> 00:10:28,435 not only have we forgotten to play, 38 00:10:29,635 --> 00:10:32,035 we have forgotten to be happy. 39 00:10:36,935 --> 00:10:41,534 And there is only one road that leads to happiness. 40 00:10:44,734 --> 00:10:48,334 And that road is called freedom. 41 00:10:51,534 --> 00:10:55,983 Sancti Apostoli Petrus et Paulus, 42 00:10:56,033 --> 00:10:58,783 de quorum potestate et auctoritate confidimus... 43 00:10:58,833 --> 00:11:03,733 What are you saying, Lenny? What's all this nonsense? 44 00:11:03,783 --> 00:11:06,332 You're not the Pope, Lenny! 45 00:11:07,032 --> 00:11:08,882 I am the Pope! 46 00:11:08,932 --> 00:11:11,132 I'm the Pope, and you, Lenny, 47 00:11:11,182 --> 00:11:14,332 are no longer a member of the Church. 48 00:11:14,932 --> 00:11:18,632 You are done with God, Lenny. 49 00:11:25,931 --> 00:11:28,331 What you mean done? 50 00:11:29,131 --> 00:11:32,131 I just barely got started with God. 51 00:11:43,280 --> 00:11:44,880 Who are you, Lenny? 52 00:11:45,530 --> 00:11:47,280 I am a contradiction. 53 00:11:48,629 --> 00:11:52,879 Like God. One in three and three in one. 54 00:11:52,929 --> 00:11:55,579 Like Mary, virgin and mother. 55 00:11:55,629 --> 00:11:57,879 Like man, good and evil. 56 00:12:00,829 --> 00:12:04,128 Today Pio XIII's papacy begins. 57 00:12:04,178 --> 00:12:05,978 Cardinals are still in Vatican City, 58 00:12:06,028 --> 00:12:09,978 and they will leave Rome only after the new Pontiff's first homily. 59 00:12:10,028 --> 00:12:12,028 I am the Pope. 60 00:12:14,927 --> 00:12:16,627 I am the Pope. 61 00:12:39,926 --> 00:12:41,626 Not knowing your tastes, Your Holiness, 62 00:12:41,676 --> 00:12:43,975 we took the liberty of preparing a little of everything. 63 00:12:44,025 --> 00:12:47,675 Didn't anyone tell you I don't eat much? Hardly anything, in fact! 64 00:12:47,725 --> 00:12:51,425 All I have in the morning is a Cherry Coke Zero. 65 00:12:52,275 --> 00:12:53,875 We will get some right away. 66 00:12:53,925 --> 00:12:56,524 - What's your name? - Domen, Your Holiness. 67 00:12:56,574 --> 00:12:58,974 I am Your Holiness's maggiordomo. 68 00:12:59,024 --> 00:13:01,524 - Do you know what Domen means? - "One who belongs to God". 69 00:13:01,574 --> 00:13:04,524 Precisely. So, by transitive property... 70 00:13:05,874 --> 00:13:07,274 you belong to me. 71 00:13:09,624 --> 00:13:11,523 How did you sleep, Your Holiness? 72 00:13:12,623 --> 00:13:14,573 I had an amusing dream. 73 00:13:15,473 --> 00:13:18,523 Cardinal Ozolins and Cardinal Aguirre slapping each other, 74 00:13:18,573 --> 00:13:20,923 and I said the most outrageous things to the crowd 75 00:13:20,973 --> 00:13:23,223 in Saint Peter's Square. 76 00:13:25,922 --> 00:13:29,172 Well then, I'll wait here for my Cherry Coke Zero. 77 00:13:43,071 --> 00:13:47,121 In the meantime would Your Holiness care for a regular Diet Coke? 78 00:13:47,671 --> 00:13:49,971 Let's not utter heresies, Domen. 79 00:13:50,021 --> 00:13:53,670 It's death to settle for things in life. 80 00:13:53,720 --> 00:13:57,420 Holy Father, while you wait, may I present Sister Bice, 81 00:13:57,470 --> 00:14:00,870 from Nepi, in delightful province of Lazio. 82 00:14:00,920 --> 00:14:02,770 She will be your personal cook. 83 00:14:02,820 --> 00:14:06,969 Sister Bice also served three pontiffs who came before you. 84 00:14:07,019 --> 00:14:10,569 When she was young, she was a missionary in India 85 00:14:10,619 --> 00:14:13,469 and fortunately for us, she speaks a good English. 86 00:14:13,519 --> 00:14:15,369 Well, my sweet Holy Father, 87 00:14:15,419 --> 00:14:18,119 now what is it you would like to have for your lunch? 88 00:14:19,768 --> 00:14:21,768 You just tell your Bice what you want, 89 00:14:21,818 --> 00:14:23,668 and I'll prepare it for you. 90 00:14:23,718 --> 00:14:27,568 Matriciana, pasta e fagioli, carbonara, lasagne... 91 00:14:27,618 --> 00:14:29,868 Am I mistaken, did she say "my sweet"? 92 00:14:29,918 --> 00:14:32,967 Your Holiness, Sister Bice is rather... quaint. 93 00:14:33,017 --> 00:14:36,417 No, Domen, she is not quaint. 94 00:14:37,117 --> 00:14:38,367 She's friendly. 95 00:14:38,417 --> 00:14:40,367 Mother... 96 00:14:40,417 --> 00:14:44,067 Let me explain something to you, that you, in your long life, 97 00:14:44,117 --> 00:14:47,416 have not yet had the occasion to understand: 98 00:14:48,666 --> 00:14:51,566 friendly relationships are dangerous. 99 00:14:51,616 --> 00:14:53,966 They lend themselves to ambiguities, 100 00:14:54,016 --> 00:14:56,716 misunderstandings, and conflicts, 101 00:14:56,766 --> 00:14:58,716 and they always end badly. 102 00:14:58,766 --> 00:15:01,465 Formal relationships, on the other hand, 103 00:15:01,515 --> 00:15:03,815 are as clear as spring water. 104 00:15:03,865 --> 00:15:06,865 Their rules are carved in stone. 105 00:15:06,915 --> 00:15:08,265 There's no risk of being misunderstood 106 00:15:08,315 --> 00:15:10,465 and they last forever. 107 00:15:10,515 --> 00:15:11,915 Now, you need to know... 108 00:15:11,965 --> 00:15:16,614 I do not appreciate friendly relationships. 109 00:15:17,714 --> 00:15:20,764 But I'm a great admirer of formal ones. 110 00:15:21,514 --> 00:15:24,264 Where there are formal relationships there are rites 111 00:15:24,314 --> 00:15:28,913 and where there are rites the earth order reigns. 112 00:15:34,813 --> 00:15:38,663 Your Holiness, His Eminence the Cardinal Secretary of State 113 00:15:38,713 --> 00:15:40,663 and the Prefects of the Various Congregations 114 00:15:40,713 --> 00:15:44,262 can't wait to make your acquaintance and to welcome you. 115 00:15:44,312 --> 00:15:45,512 Well, they're gonna have to. 116 00:15:45,562 --> 00:15:48,662 Because first I have to drink my Cherry Coke Zero. 117 00:15:51,562 --> 00:15:53,862 May God, who has enlightened every heart, help you 118 00:15:53,912 --> 00:15:57,061 to know your sins and trust His mercy. 119 00:15:57,111 --> 00:15:58,661 Your sins, Voiello? 120 00:15:58,711 --> 00:16:00,561 Tommasino, don't waste my time. 121 00:16:00,611 --> 00:16:03,861 My sins have to do with high finance and diplomacy. 122 00:16:03,911 --> 00:16:06,661 Even if I were to confess them, you wouldn't understand a thing. 123 00:16:06,711 --> 00:16:10,260 So confess those I can understand. 124 00:16:10,310 --> 00:16:12,760 I've had impure thoughts. 125 00:16:12,810 --> 00:16:14,060 About who? 126 00:16:14,110 --> 00:16:17,460 - About the Venus of Willendorf. - Who's she? 127 00:16:17,510 --> 00:16:21,060 The Paleolithic statue the Pope keeps in his library. 128 00:16:21,110 --> 00:16:23,509 It's 25,000 years-old. 129 00:16:25,059 --> 00:16:29,109 Impure and gerontophilic thoughts about a statue... 130 00:16:31,309 --> 00:16:33,559 What sort of penance can I assign for that? 131 00:16:33,609 --> 00:16:35,259 You're making things difficult for me, Voiello! 132 00:16:35,309 --> 00:16:37,958 You think about it and let me know. 133 00:16:38,008 --> 00:16:40,058 I'm in a hurry. 134 00:16:52,607 --> 00:16:56,057 Look, guys, the Holy Spirit is blowing away. 135 00:16:56,107 --> 00:16:58,757 Speaking of the Holy Spirit, what do you think? 136 00:16:58,807 --> 00:17:00,507 Did He illumine the cardinals? 137 00:17:00,557 --> 00:17:03,957 The naivet� of you Africans is really touching. 138 00:17:04,007 --> 00:17:07,056 Do you really believe that the Holy Spirit elects the Pope? 139 00:17:07,106 --> 00:17:12,056 We Africans, no, but we Catholics, yes, that is what we believe. 140 00:17:12,106 --> 00:17:13,556 Don't you, Ozolins? 141 00:17:13,606 --> 00:17:18,255 Well the Holy Spirit is not stupid but He is ironic and cunning. 142 00:17:18,305 --> 00:17:21,405 - I don't understand. - What he's trying to tell you... 143 00:17:21,455 --> 00:17:23,505 is that here in Vatican... 144 00:17:23,555 --> 00:17:27,355 the Holy Spirit is just another name for Voiello. 145 00:17:27,405 --> 00:17:31,605 Belardo is forty-seven years old. 146 00:17:32,304 --> 00:17:33,804 That's young. 147 00:17:33,854 --> 00:17:38,204 Which means we won't live to see another pope. How sad! 148 00:17:38,254 --> 00:17:41,354 Caltanissetta, it's already a miracle 149 00:17:41,404 --> 00:17:45,504 that you've lived long enough to see this one. 150 00:17:45,554 --> 00:17:51,053 I'm not so sure that Voiello has shown good leadership this time. 151 00:17:51,103 --> 00:17:54,203 I've never really trusted Voiello myself. 152 00:17:54,253 --> 00:17:56,353 He's the devil incarnate. 153 00:17:56,403 --> 00:18:01,552 Spencer would have been the right choice. 154 00:18:01,602 --> 00:18:03,652 Far too independent, 155 00:18:03,702 --> 00:18:07,352 and that wouldn't have been a good news for us cardinals. 156 00:18:11,752 --> 00:18:13,501 True. 157 00:18:13,551 --> 00:18:17,401 But all we have in exchange is a telegenic puppet. 158 00:18:17,451 --> 00:18:21,801 And that means that he can be manipulated. 159 00:18:21,851 --> 00:18:26,051 This is a masterpiece of Voiello's diplomatic cunning, 160 00:18:26,101 --> 00:18:29,550 the way he shepherded the cardinals' votes to Belardo. 161 00:18:29,600 --> 00:18:32,450 Now Belardo holds office, 162 00:18:32,500 --> 00:18:34,550 but Voiello is pulling the strings. 163 00:18:35,200 --> 00:18:38,350 And he'll run things the way we tell him, 164 00:18:38,400 --> 00:18:43,549 because once again we saved his life. 165 00:18:43,599 --> 00:18:46,349 I may be African, and I may be naive, 166 00:18:46,399 --> 00:18:48,249 but if you ask me... 167 00:18:48,299 --> 00:18:52,549 you're simplifying the future to an unhealthy degree. 168 00:18:52,599 --> 00:18:56,448 I'm in agreement with our African colleague. 169 00:18:56,998 --> 00:18:58,148 What do you mean by that? 170 00:18:58,198 --> 00:19:03,848 That you've forgotten to ask one fundamental question. 171 00:19:07,898 --> 00:19:11,447 What's Spencer going to do now 172 00:19:11,497 --> 00:19:15,847 that his beloved, detested prot�g� 173 00:19:15,897 --> 00:19:17,697 has become pope? 174 00:19:50,594 --> 00:19:55,594 "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" 175 00:19:56,594 --> 00:19:59,444 said Jesus before he was about to die. 176 00:20:00,394 --> 00:20:03,793 Which is what I say to you now, before I begin to live. 177 00:20:04,893 --> 00:20:07,043 God's infinite silence... 178 00:20:10,593 --> 00:20:13,043 God's infinite silence... 179 00:20:14,393 --> 00:20:16,643 God's infinite silence. 180 00:20:48,640 --> 00:20:52,340 Your Holiness... your sins. 181 00:20:53,790 --> 00:20:55,840 I don't have any sins to confess. 182 00:20:58,490 --> 00:21:01,089 - Are you serious? - My only sin, 183 00:21:01,139 --> 00:21:03,839 and it's an enormous one, 184 00:21:03,889 --> 00:21:07,589 is that my conscience does not accuse me of anything. 185 00:21:10,489 --> 00:21:13,638 Ego te absolvo peccatis tuis in nomine Patris, 186 00:21:13,688 --> 00:21:16,988 et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti. Amen. 187 00:21:25,238 --> 00:21:29,587 If I always heard confessions like yours, Your Holiness, 188 00:21:29,637 --> 00:21:31,587 I'd be out of a job. 189 00:21:34,587 --> 00:21:38,737 How many confessions do you hear in the Vatican, Don Tommaso? 190 00:21:38,787 --> 00:21:39,987 Me? 191 00:21:41,386 --> 00:21:45,786 The entire Curia, a good number of nuns and priests, 192 00:21:45,836 --> 00:21:49,886 as well as several lay employees who work in Vatican City. 193 00:22:03,885 --> 00:22:05,485 How old are you? 194 00:22:06,535 --> 00:22:08,834 Sixty-one. 195 00:22:08,884 --> 00:22:11,234 And how's your eyesight? 196 00:22:11,284 --> 00:22:13,834 I don't even wear glasses. 197 00:22:13,884 --> 00:22:16,134 And your hearing? 198 00:22:16,184 --> 00:22:19,534 My only problem is my hair, Your Holiness. 199 00:22:19,584 --> 00:22:21,733 You mean it's falling out? 200 00:22:21,783 --> 00:22:24,933 Not only that. Sometimes it hurts. 201 00:22:26,883 --> 00:22:28,633 Your hair hurts? 202 00:22:32,383 --> 00:22:34,983 Good, very good! 203 00:22:42,282 --> 00:22:45,382 I'll be frank, Don Tommaso, I need you. 204 00:22:46,082 --> 00:22:48,232 You must do something very important 205 00:22:48,282 --> 00:22:50,331 for the eminency of your pontiff. 206 00:22:50,381 --> 00:22:52,531 Whatever you wish, Holy Father. Tell me. 207 00:22:52,581 --> 00:22:55,181 Come then, I'll tell you in the confessional. 208 00:22:56,781 --> 00:22:59,931 Confessional booths are so beautiful. 209 00:22:59,981 --> 00:23:02,281 They look like little mountain huts. 210 00:23:03,380 --> 00:23:05,630 Do you like the mountains? 211 00:23:05,680 --> 00:23:08,380 I don't like the snow. 212 00:23:17,079 --> 00:23:19,279 Here's what I want you to do. 213 00:23:43,778 --> 00:23:46,327 Behold the Naples trinity, Federico. 214 00:23:46,377 --> 00:23:47,527 Your Eminence. 215 00:23:47,577 --> 00:23:49,577 Do you know how many books have been written about me? 216 00:23:49,627 --> 00:23:51,727 - Seventeen. - Eighteen. 217 00:23:51,777 --> 00:23:54,327 The last one's going to press next week, 218 00:23:54,377 --> 00:23:56,327 and it's got the best title of all. 219 00:23:56,377 --> 00:23:59,926 - Which is? - The Man Behind the Scenes. 220 00:23:59,976 --> 00:24:03,326 - Beautiful. - Of course. I suggested it myself. 221 00:24:03,376 --> 00:24:07,326 - Who wrote it? - Manna, that leftist reporter. 222 00:24:07,376 --> 00:24:09,726 That means it's going to be critical of you, Your Eminence. 223 00:24:09,776 --> 00:24:13,325 Of course, those are the best. They turn you into a legend. 224 00:24:15,175 --> 00:24:18,425 Don't overdo it now, or people will know you're faking it. 225 00:24:18,475 --> 00:24:20,825 Forgive me, Eminence, but that was a good one. 226 00:24:20,875 --> 00:24:23,125 You should laugh, but in proportion. 227 00:24:30,074 --> 00:24:31,224 Valente. 228 00:24:32,574 --> 00:24:34,874 - His Holiness? - He's at the Heliport. 229 00:24:34,924 --> 00:24:36,974 He just got here, and he already wants to leave? 230 00:24:38,324 --> 00:24:39,573 Now you could have laughed a little more. 231 00:24:39,623 --> 00:24:42,373 He sent me to tell you he'll be late for your meeting, Eminence. 232 00:24:42,423 --> 00:24:45,923 Okay, but if you see him, tell him not to be too late, 233 00:24:45,973 --> 00:24:48,323 because I, unlike him, have a lot to do. 234 00:24:48,373 --> 00:24:50,623 I've got to steer this boat, 235 00:24:50,673 --> 00:24:52,973 which that indecisive fisherman Peter left me. 236 00:24:54,972 --> 00:24:58,722 Valente, what do you make of him? 237 00:24:58,772 --> 00:25:03,522 He's a man of little appetite. Actually... very little. 238 00:25:03,572 --> 00:25:07,571 This is not a good sign. Not a good sign. 239 00:26:54,464 --> 00:26:55,864 Ma'. 240 00:26:56,864 --> 00:26:59,413 Don't ever call me Ma'. Call me Sister Mary. 241 00:27:03,263 --> 00:27:04,863 What's that? 242 00:27:08,263 --> 00:27:09,563 My father gave it to me. 243 00:27:09,613 --> 00:27:12,612 You can give it to me if you like. I'll hold on to it for you. 244 00:27:12,662 --> 00:27:15,662 No. My father said that I should always keep it with me. 245 00:27:38,261 --> 00:27:39,710 Lenny! 246 00:27:40,360 --> 00:27:41,760 Sister Mary. 247 00:27:48,360 --> 00:27:49,710 Here you are, my saint. 248 00:27:49,760 --> 00:27:53,059 - No, I'm not a saint. - Yes. 249 00:27:55,359 --> 00:27:57,159 Do you still have it on you? 250 00:28:01,259 --> 00:28:02,559 Always. 251 00:28:05,259 --> 00:28:06,908 What's this? 252 00:28:08,758 --> 00:28:11,558 A replica of the grotto of Our Lady of Lourdes. 253 00:28:11,608 --> 00:28:13,258 It's being restored. 254 00:28:14,308 --> 00:28:18,808 From now on, you're going to be living at the exact center of the Church. 255 00:28:25,057 --> 00:28:26,657 But I don't understand. What does that mean? 256 00:28:26,707 --> 00:28:30,507 That means that just now 257 00:28:30,557 --> 00:28:33,407 the center of the Church took a few steps back. 258 00:28:39,256 --> 00:28:41,806 Do you like the apartment? 259 00:28:41,856 --> 00:28:43,506 I'll be just fine here. 260 00:28:43,556 --> 00:28:45,206 You're only a few feet away from me. 261 00:28:45,256 --> 00:28:48,955 On the plane I read this amusing description of Rome: 262 00:28:49,555 --> 00:28:51,555 "A suburb of Vatican City." 263 00:28:52,155 --> 00:28:55,605 Well, that's not exactly true, 264 00:28:56,555 --> 00:28:57,555 but it will be. 265 00:29:17,353 --> 00:29:18,853 What's wrong, Lenny? 266 00:29:21,803 --> 00:29:23,953 What's not wrong, Sister Mary. 267 00:29:29,452 --> 00:29:31,102 North is that way. 268 00:29:33,202 --> 00:29:34,802 Where Venice is. 269 00:29:43,351 --> 00:29:45,251 Listen to me, Lenny. 270 00:29:46,351 --> 00:29:49,101 Starting today, you have to lead the Church. 271 00:29:49,701 --> 00:29:51,851 One billion people. 272 00:29:51,901 --> 00:29:53,551 One fifth of the world's population. 273 00:29:53,601 --> 00:29:56,251 Do you understand what I'm saying, Lenny? 274 00:29:56,850 --> 00:30:00,600 One billion people will depend on what you say and do. 275 00:30:00,650 --> 00:30:04,800 They'll make important decisions, happy or sad, 276 00:30:04,850 --> 00:30:06,250 of life or death, 277 00:30:06,300 --> 00:30:09,600 in order to obey you, in the name of God. 278 00:30:10,749 --> 00:30:14,549 All of this creates a new perspective. 279 00:30:15,149 --> 00:30:17,049 An immense perspective. 280 00:30:18,649 --> 00:30:23,899 Now, your personal aches, your enormous sufferings, 281 00:30:23,948 --> 00:30:25,798 your terrible memories... 282 00:30:25,848 --> 00:30:28,298 It's a harsh thing to say, Lenny, but I have to say it, 283 00:30:28,348 --> 00:30:32,098 they must take a back seat. 284 00:30:32,148 --> 00:30:33,898 They are things of this earth. 285 00:30:33,948 --> 00:30:37,847 Do you understand what I'm saying, Lenny? 286 00:30:37,897 --> 00:30:40,797 I know all your sorrows, 287 00:30:40,847 --> 00:30:42,597 I've lived with them together with you, 288 00:30:42,647 --> 00:30:44,897 I've wept over them with you, 289 00:30:44,947 --> 00:30:46,947 but now the time has come for you 290 00:30:46,997 --> 00:30:49,447 to let your sorrows to fade, 291 00:30:50,547 --> 00:30:54,546 to become irrelevant, distant memories, 292 00:30:54,596 --> 00:30:58,996 insignificant, vanquished, destroyed and overpowered 293 00:30:59,046 --> 00:31:02,796 by the terrible responsibility that God has given you. 294 00:31:04,846 --> 00:31:07,345 From now on, you are no longer Lenny Belardo, 295 00:31:07,395 --> 00:31:09,945 the fatherless, motherless boy. 296 00:31:11,145 --> 00:31:12,745 From now on, 297 00:31:13,945 --> 00:31:17,245 you are Pope Pius XIII, 298 00:31:17,295 --> 00:31:22,644 Father and Mother of the entire Catholic Church. 299 00:31:40,643 --> 00:31:44,293 Allow me to say, Your Holiness, what joy! 300 00:31:44,343 --> 00:31:46,293 What joy! 301 00:31:46,343 --> 00:31:50,592 The Holy Spirit could not have illumined us in a better manner. 302 00:31:50,642 --> 00:31:53,992 In the name of the entire Church, welcome. 303 00:31:54,042 --> 00:31:58,042 May your pontificate be long, radiant, and fruitful. 304 00:31:59,092 --> 00:32:01,041 Let's settle for long. 305 00:32:02,841 --> 00:32:04,391 What a telling joke! 306 00:32:06,491 --> 00:32:09,941 Jokes are never telling. They're jokes. 307 00:32:11,741 --> 00:32:14,191 Well, Holy father, 308 00:32:14,240 --> 00:32:16,490 first of all, a small piece of information 309 00:32:16,540 --> 00:32:19,590 of a practical and picturesque nature... 310 00:32:19,640 --> 00:32:23,090 Under your desk, on the right, you will find a button. 311 00:32:23,140 --> 00:32:26,590 If you feel that an encounter is becoming disagreeable 312 00:32:26,640 --> 00:32:27,840 or a waste of time, 313 00:32:27,890 --> 00:32:30,789 all you have to do is to press it discreetly, 314 00:32:30,839 --> 00:32:34,189 and an assistant will swiftly appear with some excuse, 315 00:32:34,239 --> 00:32:37,189 liberating you from your engagement. 316 00:32:37,239 --> 00:32:38,939 He'll lie, in other words. 317 00:32:38,989 --> 00:32:43,588 Yes, but he'll have plenty of time and opportunity to repent. 318 00:32:49,188 --> 00:32:51,388 Well, Holy Father, if you agree, 319 00:32:51,438 --> 00:32:55,438 I would like to start with our top priorities. 320 00:32:55,488 --> 00:32:57,987 The most urgent of them all 321 00:32:58,037 --> 00:33:01,087 is your first homily in Saint Peter's Square. 322 00:33:01,137 --> 00:33:03,487 There is a great deal of agitation about it, 323 00:33:03,537 --> 00:33:05,987 something which I, in my long career, 324 00:33:06,037 --> 00:33:07,987 have never quite seen before. 325 00:33:08,537 --> 00:33:12,586 The entire office of the Secretary of State is working on it. 326 00:33:12,636 --> 00:33:16,436 I myself worked all night long on a rough draft, 327 00:33:16,486 --> 00:33:18,486 which I would like to submit you. 328 00:33:18,536 --> 00:33:20,986 The press and the faithful who are coming here 329 00:33:21,036 --> 00:33:23,485 from every corner of the globe 330 00:33:23,535 --> 00:33:27,985 were all convinced that you were going to deliver your homily today. 331 00:33:28,035 --> 00:33:31,685 We did an excellent job at calming their spirits, 332 00:33:31,735 --> 00:33:33,735 but at the same time, Your Holiness, 333 00:33:33,785 --> 00:33:37,934 I am sorry to say that we can only delay for so long. 334 00:33:37,984 --> 00:33:40,834 Tomorrow would be ideal. 335 00:33:40,884 --> 00:33:44,834 There, this is the most pressing issue. 336 00:33:46,434 --> 00:33:51,183 The most pressing issue is my need for a cup of American coffee. 337 00:33:52,533 --> 00:33:55,083 Would you make me one, Your Eminence? 338 00:33:55,133 --> 00:33:58,433 Certainly. Amatucci. 339 00:33:58,483 --> 00:33:59,933 I didn't ask him. 340 00:34:01,183 --> 00:34:02,833 I asked you. 341 00:34:05,532 --> 00:34:08,332 It will be a pleasure and an honor for me 342 00:34:08,382 --> 00:34:10,832 to bring you coffee, Your Holiness. 343 00:34:31,631 --> 00:34:34,880 - Thank you, Your Eminence. - It's my duty, Blessed Father. 344 00:35:06,628 --> 00:35:09,478 Holy Father, now, about your homily, 345 00:35:09,528 --> 00:35:12,678 how would we like to proceed, then? 346 00:35:12,728 --> 00:35:13,977 Later. 347 00:35:14,027 --> 00:35:17,577 And has the Holy Father already thought of some candidates 348 00:35:17,627 --> 00:35:20,177 for the delicate role of a special assistant? 349 00:35:20,227 --> 00:35:22,177 - I have an idea. - I do too. 350 00:35:22,227 --> 00:35:23,827 Monsignor Gemelli comes to mind... 351 00:35:23,877 --> 00:35:26,527 My idea is Sister Mary. 352 00:35:32,226 --> 00:35:35,026 An admirable idea, Your Holiness, 353 00:35:35,076 --> 00:35:38,476 and completely understandable. 354 00:35:38,526 --> 00:35:41,125 Allow me to add, however, that unfortunately, 355 00:35:41,175 --> 00:35:44,275 the Curia has complex mechanisms 356 00:35:44,325 --> 00:35:48,925 which might seem like astrophysics. 357 00:35:48,975 --> 00:35:53,075 Therefore, the Holy Father's inevitable lack of experience, 358 00:35:53,125 --> 00:35:57,374 together with Sister Mary's inevitable lack of experience 359 00:35:57,424 --> 00:36:00,674 would lead me to suggest an internal contribution... 360 00:36:00,724 --> 00:36:05,374 Of course I realize how central Sister Mary seems to you. 361 00:36:05,424 --> 00:36:09,473 We could invent a sort of ad hoc role for her. 362 00:36:09,523 --> 00:36:12,473 We won't lack for imagination around here. 363 00:36:13,623 --> 00:36:14,823 Yeah. 364 00:36:16,223 --> 00:36:19,823 You're exactly right, Voiello. She's central. 365 00:36:20,523 --> 00:36:24,572 Sister Mary took me in at her orphanage when I was 7 years old, 366 00:36:24,622 --> 00:36:27,472 she raised me and she loved me. She made me a good Christian. 367 00:36:27,522 --> 00:36:29,022 A great Christian! 368 00:36:31,922 --> 00:36:35,272 Monsignor Gemelli is experienced, I would rely on him. 369 00:36:35,322 --> 00:36:37,521 Perhaps you didn't hear me correctly. 370 00:36:38,421 --> 00:36:42,721 Perhaps, Holy Father. My English does have its limits. 371 00:36:42,771 --> 00:36:44,221 You'd better improve it then. 372 00:36:45,921 --> 00:36:49,771 Sister Mary will be my special assistant. 373 00:36:49,821 --> 00:36:52,170 As you wish, Holy Father. 374 00:36:52,220 --> 00:36:55,470 Then, of course, there is the matter of drafting 375 00:36:55,520 --> 00:36:59,470 and delivering your address to the College of Cardinals. 376 00:36:59,520 --> 00:37:01,220 They're all still here. 377 00:37:01,270 --> 00:37:04,669 They will not leave the Vatican until you address them. 378 00:37:06,069 --> 00:37:07,169 Later. 379 00:37:07,219 --> 00:37:09,769 In the office of the Secretary, 380 00:37:09,819 --> 00:37:12,219 we have been wondering if the Holy Father 381 00:37:12,269 --> 00:37:15,669 would care to provide us with some indications 382 00:37:15,719 --> 00:37:18,868 regarding the draft of an encyclical. 383 00:37:18,918 --> 00:37:20,218 Later. 384 00:37:21,468 --> 00:37:23,468 The prefects of the various congregations 385 00:37:23,518 --> 00:37:27,318 are of course eager to see you with their own eyes. 386 00:37:27,368 --> 00:37:31,667 But I imagine that you would like to deal with this matter... later? 387 00:37:32,617 --> 00:37:34,217 No, now. 388 00:37:34,817 --> 00:37:38,817 First off, I want to meet the Prefect for the Congregation for the Clergy. 389 00:37:41,417 --> 00:37:43,567 At any rate, Holy Father, 390 00:37:43,617 --> 00:37:47,866 I understand your reluctance about the encyclical. 391 00:37:47,916 --> 00:37:50,366 Your predecessor always made me laugh 392 00:37:50,416 --> 00:37:52,066 when he said that... 393 00:37:52,116 --> 00:37:56,566 an encyclical is like Proust's "In Search of Lost Time". 394 00:37:56,616 --> 00:38:00,115 "Everyone quotes it, but no one reads it." 395 00:38:12,115 --> 00:38:13,764 Are you sleeping, Holy Father? 396 00:38:15,814 --> 00:38:17,464 No Your Eminence, I'm praying. 397 00:38:19,314 --> 00:38:20,564 For you. 398 00:38:31,413 --> 00:38:34,263 Stop looking at the Venus of Willendorf in that way. 399 00:38:47,962 --> 00:38:50,412 Holy Father, Holy Father, 400 00:38:50,462 --> 00:38:53,162 smoking is not allowed in the papal palace! 401 00:38:54,711 --> 00:38:56,211 Is that so? 402 00:38:58,011 --> 00:39:01,261 - Who decided that? - John Paul II. 403 00:39:01,311 --> 00:39:04,261 - The Pope? - Yes, the Pope. 404 00:39:04,311 --> 00:39:05,811 There's a new Pope now. 405 00:39:07,711 --> 00:39:09,310 True. 406 00:39:12,110 --> 00:39:14,360 - Your Eminence... - Yes, Holy Father. 407 00:39:14,410 --> 00:39:17,010 You're too tied to the past. 408 00:39:17,060 --> 00:39:20,810 They say the same thing about you, Your Holiness. 409 00:39:22,509 --> 00:39:26,559 The past is an enormous place, with all sorts of things inside. 410 00:39:28,309 --> 00:39:30,109 Not so with the present. 411 00:39:30,909 --> 00:39:32,909 The present is merely a narrow opening, 412 00:39:32,959 --> 00:39:35,358 with room for only one pair of eyes. 413 00:39:37,408 --> 00:39:39,058 Mine. 414 00:40:05,056 --> 00:40:07,806 - Your eminence. - Yes. 415 00:40:08,706 --> 00:40:10,656 Our top priorities. 416 00:40:10,706 --> 00:40:13,156 Here I am. As I was saying... 417 00:40:13,206 --> 00:40:16,556 You will be in charge of politics, 418 00:40:16,606 --> 00:40:19,455 finance, theology, 419 00:40:19,505 --> 00:40:21,855 appointments and promotions. 420 00:40:21,905 --> 00:40:24,455 I will take care of worldly matters, 421 00:40:24,505 --> 00:40:27,555 travel, adulation of the masses, celebrations. 422 00:40:27,605 --> 00:40:31,304 A most effective division of roles, Holy Father. 423 00:40:32,904 --> 00:40:35,754 - Your Eminence. - Yes, Blessed Father? 424 00:40:35,804 --> 00:40:37,504 I was just kidding. 425 00:40:38,804 --> 00:40:42,004 - That wasn't obvious? - Hardly! 426 00:40:42,804 --> 00:40:47,653 So, as I was saying, our top priorities are... 427 00:40:48,203 --> 00:40:51,903 One: the Radio Vatican signal needs boosting. 428 00:40:51,953 --> 00:40:55,453 It is unacceptable that reception is so poor. 429 00:40:55,503 --> 00:41:00,202 Two: the pope wants to see all the gifts the pope receives. 430 00:41:00,252 --> 00:41:04,302 Have a storage facility fitted out for storing all the gifts I receive. 431 00:41:04,352 --> 00:41:08,552 Three: the Vatican must immediately buy back the papal tiara 432 00:41:08,602 --> 00:41:11,452 from the basilica in Washington DC, 433 00:41:11,502 --> 00:41:16,701 which my predecessors, who favoured sobriety over tradition, 434 00:41:16,751 --> 00:41:18,701 imprudently let go. 435 00:41:19,501 --> 00:41:20,801 And four... 436 00:41:21,751 --> 00:41:25,700 Sister Mary will also look after you. 437 00:41:26,800 --> 00:41:29,150 She will oversee all your activities 438 00:41:29,200 --> 00:41:32,100 and report directly back to me. 439 00:41:34,000 --> 00:41:36,200 She will be your guardian angel. 440 00:41:38,300 --> 00:41:41,449 I'm sixty years, Holy Father. 441 00:41:41,499 --> 00:41:43,349 I don't need a guardian angel. 442 00:41:43,399 --> 00:41:46,849 Oh, we all need a guardian angel, Voiello. 443 00:41:46,899 --> 00:41:50,499 Especially unscrupulous, ambiguous men. 444 00:41:51,199 --> 00:41:54,448 Then, please, allow me to choose mine myself. 445 00:41:54,498 --> 00:41:56,648 In another life. 446 00:41:56,698 --> 00:41:58,648 In this life, 447 00:41:58,698 --> 00:42:02,348 the Pope chooses your guardian angel for you. 448 00:42:02,398 --> 00:42:06,148 And he is the Pope. 449 00:42:07,097 --> 00:42:09,397 Did you call for me, Holy Father? 450 00:42:37,495 --> 00:42:38,895 Papa! 451 00:42:49,294 --> 00:42:52,644 It all comes back to this in the end, doesn't it? 452 00:42:52,694 --> 00:42:54,194 To the mother. 453 00:42:58,194 --> 00:43:00,994 How was your mother like, Monsignor Gutierrez? 454 00:43:04,443 --> 00:43:08,893 She was a woman who did not scorn wickedness. 455 00:43:08,943 --> 00:43:12,643 And it had the effect of creating a son full of goodness. 456 00:43:14,393 --> 00:43:16,242 I've inquired about you. 457 00:43:17,542 --> 00:43:21,192 Everyone tells me you are a shining example of goodness. 458 00:43:22,492 --> 00:43:25,442 I thank you for believing them, Holy Father. 459 00:43:26,892 --> 00:43:28,792 It is I who should thank you, 460 00:43:28,842 --> 00:43:32,141 for allowing me to be here without hordes of tourists. 461 00:43:32,191 --> 00:43:34,341 That's my duty, Holy Father. 462 00:43:34,391 --> 00:43:37,141 Was it hard? To close off the Basilica to tourists? 463 00:43:37,191 --> 00:43:41,541 No, no, all we had to do was hang up a sign saying "closed". 464 00:43:52,740 --> 00:43:56,390 I will never shed my aversion to tourists. 465 00:43:58,389 --> 00:44:00,489 Why is that, Holy Father? 466 00:44:06,239 --> 00:44:08,889 Because they are just passing through. 467 00:44:16,338 --> 00:44:20,738 I was late because I couldn't find your office. 468 00:44:20,788 --> 00:44:23,088 I know. You opened the wrong door 469 00:44:23,138 --> 00:44:26,437 and found yourself face to face with some visitors to our museum. 470 00:44:26,487 --> 00:44:29,537 Oh, you've been inquired about me too. 471 00:44:29,587 --> 00:44:33,537 It's very difficult to keep anything secret here in the Vatican. 472 00:44:34,537 --> 00:44:37,137 Rumors fly so quickly 473 00:44:37,187 --> 00:44:41,486 that sometimes they arrive even before the event has taken place. 474 00:44:42,586 --> 00:44:46,186 That's quite a useful piece of information for my future. 475 00:44:46,236 --> 00:44:49,536 Which is exactly what it was intended to be, Holy Father. 476 00:44:50,186 --> 00:44:53,735 What is one to do, Monsignor? 477 00:44:53,785 --> 00:44:58,135 It's the times. In America, we call it gossip. 478 00:44:58,685 --> 00:45:02,185 Here in the Vatican we call it calumny. 479 00:45:03,285 --> 00:45:04,685 This way. 480 00:45:16,434 --> 00:45:19,234 How many years have you been at the Vatican? 481 00:45:19,284 --> 00:45:21,883 So many that I've stopped to counting. 482 00:45:21,933 --> 00:45:23,633 Do you like it here? 483 00:45:23,683 --> 00:45:26,233 Yes, I feel safe here. 484 00:45:27,933 --> 00:45:31,283 It's as if time were dead. 485 00:45:34,682 --> 00:45:36,282 Speaking of that time, 486 00:45:36,332 --> 00:45:38,582 the other day, during the Conclave, 487 00:45:38,632 --> 00:45:40,532 I read an Italian newspaper. 488 00:45:41,782 --> 00:45:46,682 It was an article about this politician 489 00:45:46,732 --> 00:45:50,031 who had hidden some compromising files 490 00:45:50,081 --> 00:45:53,331 in the gaps between the walls of his house. 491 00:45:53,381 --> 00:45:55,431 Yes, I read about that as well. 492 00:45:55,981 --> 00:45:57,681 I thought... 493 00:46:00,281 --> 00:46:03,880 I wouldn't need to hide anything in the gaps in my house. 494 00:46:06,630 --> 00:46:09,180 Because my mind is a gap. 495 00:46:10,430 --> 00:46:14,930 And everything that is hidden from me, 496 00:46:16,279 --> 00:46:18,079 sooner or later... 497 00:46:20,029 --> 00:46:21,279 is revealed. 498 00:46:23,779 --> 00:46:27,979 As if it were being entrusted to me. 499 00:46:31,678 --> 00:46:34,528 A precious skill for leading the Church. 500 00:46:37,878 --> 00:46:40,078 It's not a skill, Gutierrez... 501 00:46:42,877 --> 00:46:44,227 it's my destiny. 502 00:47:36,774 --> 00:47:41,173 Federico, do you know why all the good souls of this world 503 00:47:41,223 --> 00:47:44,823 - rage against power? - Why, Your Eminence? 504 00:47:44,873 --> 00:47:47,773 Because they simply don't know what it is. 505 00:47:49,173 --> 00:47:50,523 What is it? 506 00:47:51,622 --> 00:47:53,922 Power is knowledge. 507 00:47:55,672 --> 00:47:58,922 What is it you want to know, Eminence? 508 00:47:59,472 --> 00:48:04,172 Who is Pius XIII? Or rather, who was Lenny Belardo? 509 00:48:04,822 --> 00:48:07,521 You need to carry out a small investigation, 510 00:48:07,571 --> 00:48:09,921 discreet but thorough. 511 00:48:09,971 --> 00:48:13,571 His week spots, traumas and tribulations, his sins. 512 00:48:14,771 --> 00:48:16,421 Especially his sins. 513 00:48:16,971 --> 00:48:18,621 Because the sins we commit in the past 514 00:48:18,671 --> 00:48:22,320 are the same ones we'll commit in the future. 515 00:48:22,370 --> 00:48:26,770 Because man is like God. He never changes. 516 00:48:27,720 --> 00:48:29,420 I'll start right in. 517 00:48:29,470 --> 00:48:32,020 But is the situation of this papacy already that serious? 518 00:48:32,070 --> 00:48:36,119 No, not yet. But if it were to become so, 519 00:48:36,169 --> 00:48:37,319 we'll be ready. 520 00:48:39,469 --> 00:48:42,219 Because the powerful may have knowledge, 521 00:48:43,519 --> 00:48:46,669 but they don't realize what it takes to be more powerful than anyone else. 522 00:48:49,018 --> 00:48:50,768 And what does it take? 523 00:48:50,818 --> 00:48:53,118 See how beautiful it is? 524 00:48:53,168 --> 00:48:55,568 It takes getting knowledge before anyone else does. 525 00:48:56,368 --> 00:48:57,668 Fabulous. 526 00:49:06,717 --> 00:49:08,817 Go on, Tommaso, don't be afraid. 527 00:49:11,217 --> 00:49:14,267 But violating the secret of the confessional is... 528 00:49:14,316 --> 00:49:15,416 No, no, it's not. 529 00:49:15,466 --> 00:49:18,916 Not if the information is intended for me, the Pontiff, 530 00:49:18,966 --> 00:49:21,266 and is for the survival of our Church. 531 00:49:24,366 --> 00:49:26,166 Don't disappoint me, Tommaso. 532 00:49:26,216 --> 00:49:30,915 Your Holiness, I'm just a poor, simple priest, 533 00:49:30,965 --> 00:49:33,615 and the secret of the confessional 534 00:49:33,665 --> 00:49:35,915 is the only respectable thing I have. 535 00:49:35,965 --> 00:49:38,965 Today. But think of tomorrow. 536 00:49:39,015 --> 00:49:42,514 Scarlet robes and the ring are in your future. 537 00:49:43,964 --> 00:49:48,114 The cardinalship, my dear. Which is much more respectable. 538 00:49:50,414 --> 00:49:52,564 What if someone hears us? 539 00:49:54,064 --> 00:49:56,013 Only he can hear us up here. 540 00:49:57,663 --> 00:49:59,563 Who knows where he is? 541 00:50:03,563 --> 00:50:06,063 There! By the big dipper. 542 00:50:07,963 --> 00:50:09,812 That's where God's house is. 543 00:50:11,062 --> 00:50:14,462 God's house! What's it like? 544 00:50:15,162 --> 00:50:19,512 Half of a duplex, with a private swimming pool. 545 00:50:22,262 --> 00:50:24,561 Come on now, tell me people's sins. 546 00:50:27,461 --> 00:50:28,661 Well... 547 00:50:30,811 --> 00:50:34,111 have I already told you about Voiello's impure thoughts 548 00:50:34,161 --> 00:50:36,661 about the Venus of Willendorf? 549 00:50:36,711 --> 00:50:39,560 Yes, yes you told me already. What else? 550 00:50:45,960 --> 00:50:47,760 No, nothing... 551 00:50:49,110 --> 00:50:52,059 Cardinal Aguirre did an imitation 552 00:50:52,109 --> 00:50:54,909 of you today, Your Holiness. 553 00:50:54,959 --> 00:50:57,609 - Everyone laughed. - Did you laugh? 554 00:51:03,759 --> 00:51:07,858 Yes, but to myself. So no one noticed. 555 00:51:08,908 --> 00:51:11,708 Good. What else? 556 00:51:14,858 --> 00:51:19,307 Everybody is wondering who Sister Mary is to you, 557 00:51:19,357 --> 00:51:21,057 what she's doing here. 558 00:51:22,407 --> 00:51:24,057 What else? 559 00:51:24,107 --> 00:51:26,857 Everybody is also wondering: 560 00:51:26,907 --> 00:51:30,657 is the Pope thinking about his first homily? 561 00:51:31,957 --> 00:51:34,156 I ask myself the same thing all the time. 562 00:51:34,206 --> 00:51:35,856 Of course I'm thinking about it. 563 00:51:37,506 --> 00:51:40,706 It's all I think about. I even dreamed about it. 564 00:51:43,356 --> 00:51:45,406 I'm let you in on a secret: 565 00:51:46,605 --> 00:51:49,655 ever since I was little, I've learned to confound people's ideas 566 00:51:49,705 --> 00:51:51,955 on what's going on in my head. 567 00:51:53,055 --> 00:51:55,205 You're so wise, Holy Father. 568 00:51:56,155 --> 00:51:57,705 Not only that, 569 00:51:58,755 --> 00:52:03,154 I'm also intransigent, irritable, 570 00:52:04,904 --> 00:52:06,554 vindictive... 571 00:52:09,054 --> 00:52:11,804 and I have a prodigious memory. 572 00:52:13,154 --> 00:52:15,403 And now I want to make my confession. 573 00:52:15,453 --> 00:52:19,603 - Fine. Let's go back downstairs... - No, here. 574 00:52:20,653 --> 00:52:22,003 Before the house of God. 575 00:52:22,903 --> 00:52:25,403 Oh... okay. 576 00:52:29,302 --> 00:52:32,402 In nomine Patris, et Filii et Spiritus Sancti. 577 00:52:32,452 --> 00:52:36,752 God, my conscience does not accuse me, 578 00:52:37,702 --> 00:52:41,651 because you do not believe I am capable of repenting. 579 00:52:42,751 --> 00:52:45,201 And therefore, I do not believe in you. 580 00:52:46,651 --> 00:52:50,401 I don't believe you are capable of saving me from myself. 581 00:52:51,851 --> 00:52:55,500 Holy father, what are you saying? 582 00:52:57,700 --> 00:53:00,800 I'm saying that I don't believe in God, Tommaso. 583 00:53:00,850 --> 00:53:03,300 What are you saying, Blessed Father? 584 00:53:03,350 --> 00:53:04,900 Tommaso, Tommaso. 585 00:53:08,650 --> 00:53:09,849 I was joking. 44724

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