Original subtitles

Well, no wonder I had so much trouble finding a pan of this formula.

You must buy it by the case, huh?

It's less money that way.

Have you ever used Kress' baby formula before?

No.

It was just a better buy.

well certainly the least expensive of all the formulas look I do research for

Jerry Bingers watch out would you mind if I took your name and phone number and

called you in a few days to see how you liked it so the end good here's my card

now I know I have a pen here somewhere ah permítame señora aquí tengo

- Ah, gracias. - De nada.

Ah, mi numero es...

Bueno, me llamo Dorita Rodriguez.

♪

- Okay, here we go again!

Ready, Timmy?

No way you're gonna score on me, no way!

Oh, oh!

Lucky shot, lucky shot, but this one seems pretty good.

Okay, here I come, hit, hit, hit.

Well, I guess we can safely say that this one is no good.

Okay, I hope you're ready, because this time I'm coming in for two.

There you have it, ladies and gentlemen, four out of five balls with serious leaks.

Now, we tested 25 brand new basketballs from the Norris Mail Order Company, and 16 of them

had leaks.

And when we called the people at Norris to ask them about this problem, and they said,

no comment. Now we all know what that means, don't we? Watch out! Watch out is right. Now

the Norris basketball is the most inexpensive ball on the market, but that's because it's

made from an inferior grade of rubber. We're sorry, we cannot recommend the Norris basketball.

Timmy, thanks for bringing this problem to our attention, and we have as a gift for you,

Thank you, Allegra.

a watch-out t-shirt, and a brand-new basketball from a reputable sporting goods firm.

Thank you, Timmy!

We're almost out of time.

Next week, we'll be doing the watch-out taste test,

comparing real lemonade to Casden Foods' lemonade-flavored drink.

We're also going to be looking into the Krebs baby formula.

Now, as you know, Krebs is a company

that has given us considerable trouble in the past,

so we're gonna be watching the results of this test closely.

Again, thank you all for being here.

Remember, each and every one of you has an important voice

in this democratic society.

Give a damn, you can make a difference.

So keep your eyes open and.

You got it, see you next week.

Hey, did you see Timmy? He was great, wasn't he?

- Yes, Jerry, it was a great show. - Yeah, thanks.

- Jerry, we just got the new ratings.

- Man, I don't get it.

The audience loves us, we were a hit last year,

and this year the ratings just keep sliding.

I just don't get it!

What are we doing wrong?

Go, Willie, go!

Yeah, faster, come on, faster!

Hey, let's go over to Hamptons and play some badminton.

No, please, anything but badminton.

What's wrong with badminton?

You mean you like dancing around like a fruitcake with those skinny little racquets chasing birdies?

They're called shuttlecocks.

They're weird.

Badminton's weird.

People who play badminton are weird.

Hey, I like badminton.

So do I.

See what I mean?

Come on, let's go.

Uh, guys, hang on a second.

Um, I can't make it today.

Why not?

I promised my mom I'd clean up my room.

We're having company.

In your room?

No, not in my room.

But you know how mothers show off the house when guests come over.

So I'll see you in school tomorrow. Bye.

Ham never cleans his room.

Yeah, it's like the Raiders of the Lost Ark in there.

Something's up.

Now the important thing to remember is that there are no user serviceable parts in the

audiometer.

Okay, now if you ever think it's malfunctioning, say if the red light doesn't come on when

the set is turned on, call our office, the number is right here, under service.

Okay.

Going somewhere?

We thought we'd come by and help you clean your room.

We know what kind of job that is.

And if we got done early, maybe we can even play some badminton.

Yeah, I bet.

Look, you guys gotta leave. We're not supposed to let anyone know what's going on in there.

What's going on in there?

I just told you. We're not supposed to let anyone know.

Alice, ask the man what's going on in there.

Pam, we're your best friends.

Best friends don't keep secrets from each other.

together. Now, what's going on in there? We're getting a STATCOM box. Cool! What's a STATCOM

box? A new type of video game? No, it's from STATCOM. It's a rating service. You know,

one of those companies that rate television programs. The STATCOM. You know, this could

be outstanding. That little box in there's got to be networked through the STATCOM central

computer richie what if we'd had this last year we could have made square

pegs the number one show in the country I get back in there so when we see the

box call me later maybe after supper you can come over don't go by the window

anymore okay

♪

Sure know how to hold a grudge, Lou.

Too mad at me, aren't you? After all these years.

No, I am not mad at you.

Yes you are, you mad at me.

I am not mad at you.

What do you want, Jerry?

I want your help.

Okay, Jerry, it does sound like someone's trying to kill you.

You've been offending lately.

You gotta be kidding.

Don't you watch my show?

What show?

All right, I watch it.

I offend everybody.

It's my job.

Jerry, maybe you push somebody too far.

far like the old days mr. more radical than thou like the time you charge 50

cops with a bouquet of flowers screaming stop the war stop the war well how else

was I gonna get their attention you got their attention all right and you got me

a head full of stitches Lou you always were a good friend that's why I'm here

somebody is trying to kill me you want to know what else my ratings are going

down I'm taking a nose dive Jerry right into the old bucket Jerry somebody's

trying to kill you and you're worried about your ratings they can't just make

me disappear I'm too much of a public figure oh I tried to make it look like an

accident this afternoon with my car it almost succeeded but if my ratings keep

falling I'm gonna get canceled then I won't be a public figure anymore they can

just off me throw me in a ditch kill me anywhere they want my fan mail has gone

up 25% of the last year now never mind that it's all been positive fan mail

would never take that kind of a jump if my ratings were dropping the way they

appear to be Lou the only way my ratings are going down is if somebody is getting

into that statcom computer and screwing around with my statcom.

You gotta admit...

if it's true, it'd make a hell of a story.

Hello?

Hey, Ricky. Thanks.

Listen, uh, you ever heard of the statcoms?

Sure. In fact...

- Have you ever heard of any of your hacker buddies

getting access to the StatCom computer?

- No, but--

- Do you think there's any way

that we can find out if that's possible?

- Thought you'd never ask.

- You mean it is?

- Sure, it'd be easy.

- We'll be right over.

- Ah, Lou, this is Judy Hubbard.

Judy, Lou Farley.

- How do you do? - Good, nice to meet you.

Judy is absolutely indispensable to me.

I just, I couldn't get along without her.

- Don't be disappointed.

The Casden lemonade flavored drink

does have some real lemon in it.

- It does.

Well, that's too bad.

- It is?

- Thanks for a better story if the whole thing's artificial.

What about the Krebs baby formula?

- Well, we've just started.

I should have something in a day or so.

I bumped into a woman at the store who was buying some.

I got her name and address

so we can get her opinion of the formula.

Great, great. I'll check in tomorrow.

Move!

Bye.

Nice to meet you.

So what... what's so bad about Cribb?

They're sleazebags. They buy up manufacturer's seconds. They're rejects.

Product runs with poor quality control.

There's stuff that no reputable company wants to sell.

They slap a label on it, they dump it on the retail market,

and if they can't sell it in this country,

then they unload it in South America or Africa.

- Sounds like they got a real good neighbor policy going.

- Yeah, they've even been investigated

by the United Nations.

I'm not worried if it's not all that Jerry finger's ratings will get healthy again watch

out might suddenly become the hottest show in the country we're very pleased with what

you're doing for us here Mr. Sinclair. In fact, Tomasino and myself would like to explore

the possibilities of this relationship. I mean, beyond the current situation with Binger.

You know, I don't take advantage of my position, you see. I've worked for STATCOM for twenty

years now. I'm a trusted and valued employee. Mr. Martin Beale has told me that himself.

our founder in fact he gave me this watch on my 20th anniversary with the

firm of course I would have preferred stock options oh we understand all that

mr. Sinclair don't we Thomasine sure we just thought look one rating point could

mean possibly millions of dollars in advertising right I mean the guys that

The producer's show might like to make a contribution.

You could bump their ratings a little.

You overfed gutter rats.

What makes you think that I need you for that, hm?

Well, the less people who knew you were the one controlling

the stat comps, the better.

Yeah, the less, the better.

Whatever germ of an idea you have going on

in your filthy little minds, forget it.

Now, do you understand?

I am the one that controls what happens

to the stack comes in only me I'm the only one that has that kind of power. Me not

you. Right sure sorry Mr Sinclair forget that I mentioned it.

We have a responsibility now. We're a STACCOM family. We should watch more shows on public

television.

Oh yeah, great. Maybe we'll do another hour and a half on that pizza parlor in Indiana.

So, anything's better than letting STACCOM know we watch your favorite show. My mother

the chip. Hey, come on, guys. Why don't we just watch what we always watch? Hey,

Richie, any hidden microphones in that thing? No, nothing yet. Good. We still have

some privacy left. I will say it once more. We have a responsibility here. The

stat command told me that our household represents many of the households.

Around 100,000 to be exact.

Always a thrill havin' Mr. Know-It-All around.

Leave my friends alone!

Uh, maybe we should see what shows are on and, uh, then take a vote.

No, why don't we hold an election?

We could... we could put our choices on secret ballots.

Why don't we have to take a vote? We've never taken a vote before.

How are you?

My mother-in-law Jim isn't out tonight.

Come here, you little twerp.

Uh, is it okay if we turn on the TV, Mr. Parker?

Well, that's a start.

That should be the phone number in the StagCon computer.

and those tones should have identified us as the Parker family.

You did it. You're in.

Maybe. Let's just check.

Hello?

Oh, Ham, it's Richard. Did you get in?

That depends if you're watching Channel 8 right now.

We are. Change it.

Okay, I'll change it to 10. Hang on.

Some members of the council suggested that--

We're in.

Pam?

I'm just checking something out.

OK.

Yeah, now leave it on channel 8 for watch out.

Right.

Stay tuned to Jerry Binger's "Watch Out."

Here we go, Mr. Binger.

Call me Jerry, kid.

You're tuned to KLAF, channel 8, Los Angeles.

Call me Richie, Jerry.

Okay, Richie. What happens now?

Well, we know Ham's family is watching your show.

We'll just wait till the show is over, then we'll get into the system itself so we can find out how many other families are watching.

Hey! Your friends just changed channels!

Keep your eyes open, man!

We didn't. We're still watching it. You can hear it in the background.

What do you say?

It is Jake Chavis. They're still watching.

Watch out for return after these messages.

yes a Jerry Binger is here in the lobby mr. Sinclair I've told him we do not give

interviews I'll talk to him he's coming right down good get me mr. Beale yes

Thank you.

Do you have a show on television, Mr. Finger?

Yeah, I do. It's called Watch Out.

Ask Mr. Sprague to come in, please.

I see. And you're unhappy with your ratings.

I can prove that my ratings are wrong.

Wrong? That's hardly possible.

I mean, we do have a margin of error, but...

I'm not talking about a margin of anything.

I'm telling you that the STATCOM ratings on Watch Out are rigged.

It's impossible.

I'm sorry if you're unhappy with your ratings, but I'm afraid your problem doesn't lie with

STATCOM.

It lies with your audience.

Now, if your ratings are failing, it's because people aren't watching.

It's as simple as that, good day.

I'll get proof!

And you're sure it's Sinclair?

Yes, sir, I'm sure.

my secretary if she has the aspirin.

>> So this, the name of the place is Time Quiet Lab?

>> Yes.

>> Analysis.

And you've worked how long?

>> Five years.

>> Five.

>> Five years.

This is an obvious question, but to your knowledge, has anyone fired recently that they might have?

No, no, nothing like that.

Miss Hubbard, hi, what happened?

I don't know, I got here, look at this, what a mess!

We know each other. We have a mutual friend.

What companies were you currently running tests for?

Quite a few, I could give you a list from memory, but...

No, that's all right, but maybe you could write me one up when you have a free moment.

All these companies, were there any that were being tested for something of a particularly sensitive nature of a discreet or controversial nature?

No, all our findings are confidential, of course. We only report the results to our clients. There was nothing out of the ordinary. I don't know what happened.

Can I talk to you?

Please stay. I want to ask you a couple more questions.

Okay.

So who's your mutual friend?

Jerry Binger.

Watch out?

Who set the fire?

Who said anybody set the fire?

It was an accident. You wouldn't be here, would you?

The fire was set at approximately 2 a.m. this morning.

The alarm system did not sound.

Thanks. We don't know why yet.

There's a possibility it was tampered with.

What about the sprinkler system?

The sprinkler system went off in the rest of the building but not in the lab.

Sabotage?

Well, the artist that's going up there right now, I imagine we'll find out shortly.

And no, I do not know how it started.

Thanks.

- He accused us of fixing his ratings.

- You?

He accused you?

- No, not me personally, the company.

- Not on the desk.

- He don't like to eat on the floor.

- That's the problem.

- I don't understand, how did he find out?

- I don't know, he said he had proof.

- What kind of proof could he have for crying out loud?

Who does this guy think he is?

You know, most people you reason with,

You find out where to itch and you're off of the scratch.

But not this guy, no.

He thinks he's some kind of saint or something.

- That's the problem.

He's idealistic.

- Yeah, sure.

When's he gonna grow up already?

Jerry?

Jerry.

- What are you doing?

- What do you care?

- Did you hear about the lab, Judy?

- She called me.

- Well, I was just over there.

The lab's gone, it's gutted.

- Well, that reigns it for us.

- Something else happened?

- The what?

- We got our pink slip.

Show was canceled.

We got one more to do and that's it.

They won, Lou.

Whoever they is, or,

they won.

- Jerry.

Quit acting like a cliche.

We're not dead yet.

We're not dead yet.

- You're not even dying.

I'm buried.

- Hey, hold it.

Hold it.

Now everything we went through in the 60s

and now all you care about is success,

you got one more show to do, Jerry.

One more show and you're sitting here

feeling sorry for yourself.

Well, all right, but 10 million people are going to watch that show.

It's too bad you can't make it count for something.

- I got it.

I got it.

Ho ho.

Man, you're a genius.

- What's he want with some kid?

- You got me.

- But this is really a first that I know of,

Mr. Bingers challenging the accuracy,

indeed the integrity of the STATCOM organization.

- Exactly.

The ratings on watch out have not been accurate.

- And what does STATCOM have to say

about the Starling accusation?

say disagree but I'm going to prove it. Watch my show tomorrow night tomorrow

night the first time ever Jerry Bingers watch out will be broadcast live

coast-to-coast I'm going to do the show from a secret location where I'll prove

with the help of a computer expert that comes ratings on my show are completely

fault Jerry what are you doing Jerry Jerry if these allegations you're making

are true the consequences could be very serious I'm well aware of that but it's

my job to bring the truth to the public whatever the truth you direct I want you

talking about computer expert find out we got to put a stop to this

But don't you understand, you dipped your hand too early.

Hey, whoever's rigging your ratings is gonna see that interview.

They'd be crazy to try it again.

Jerry, you don't have a good ambusher.

The bad guys spot you before they go into the past.

It doesn't make any difference. We're covered either way.

How do you figure that?

Look, if they're fixing our ratings, we're gonna catch them doing it.

I'm gonna have camera crews in Richie's bedroom and at the Parker kid's house.

Millions of people will see them do it.

Great.

And if they're not fixing our ratings...

You get the true reading of what your actual audience is, good.

Did you stop to figure that you might be putting yourself in danger?

Now look what they did to your car and the laboratory.

Sure.

Look, do you remember that peace march in Washington, the riot squads coming at us with their nightsticks?

Remember that cop was getting ready to whack you on the side of the head?

Do you remember what you said to him? I mean, you stood there, didn't even flinch, and you said something.

Remember what you said?

I was a kid.

I was naive.

Do you remember what you said?

I'm not afraid.

That's right.

You didn't say it defiantly.

You just said it as a plain, simple, ordinary fact.

He didn't hit you, did he?

No.

He grabbed me by my ponytail and dragged me out to the paddy wagon.

But he didn't hit you.

He was going to hit you, and he didn't.

You see, that's how I feel.

I'm not afraid of it.

I'm not afraid.

What are you doing?

I missed the bus.

She missed it on purpose.

She has a spelling test today.

I do not!

- I heard you practicing in the bathroom this morning.

- You sneak!

- Cheryl.

You're gonna be in school a lot more years

and taking a lot more tests.

Just because some of the tests are hard

doesn't mean you can get out of them.

The best thing you can do is just to march

right into that classroom and take the test

and do the best you can.

And if you do the best you can,

no one has the right to say anything against you.

You're still a stink.

Uh, so, what's going on tonight?

You said something about Jerry Binger coming over?

I was going to be a surprise.

Well, surprise me now.

Hello, we're going to be on TV.

What?

Yeah, don't put yourself out. We're not going to be in the rest of the house.

It's just my room.

I think I need a new dress.

Cheryl, come on, honey.

I'll take you to school.

And Mama's going to go do some shopping.

- Is this a computer? - Yeah, I think your father is a computer expert.

- Mr. Farley, come in.

- Uh-huh, over.

- Oh, thank you for coming.

I can't reach Jerry.

- Yeah, me neither.

I think he's getting ready for his show tonight.

What's wrong here?

- I think I have an idea who set fire to my lab.

- Uh-huh.

- Mrs. Dorita Rodriguez.

I met her at a supermarket.

She was buying a product I was running some tests on.

- Dorita called me at home a little while ago

and told me that her baby was very sick.

She thinks that this is why she's sick.

The baby was fine until Mrs. Rodriguez gave her

some of Krebs' baby formula.

The baby kept throwing it up.

When she finally was able to keep it down,

the baby became colicky.

- Colicky.

- Well, like she is now.

I think we should get her to the hospital.

Tonight's the night, we're all going to be on TV.

Oh yeah, watch out, give me five hours.

Five what?

What's the matter with you, aren't you excited?

Of course I'm excited, that doesn't mean I'm going to hop around like a jerk.

- What's wrong?

- Where's Mel?

- Oh no!

- Something's stolen.

- Shouldn't we call the police?

- Yeah, well what am I supposed to do?

I got three camera crews standing by.

I'm on the air, live, in less than three hours,

and I don't have any--

Jerry, wait a minute, wait a minute.

- Listen, you have a computer down at the Gazette, don't you?

- Yes.

- Great, listen, that's where we'll show 'em

what's been going on with my ratings.

Jerry, would you forget about your stupid ratings

for a moment?

- Forget my ratings?

- Yeah, yeah.

Read this.

Believe me, it's a lot more important.

You carry a kind of toxic low, severe stomach pain,

unable to hold food, continuous screening from pain,

body temperature 102.

- It was one sick baby. - Yeah.

And the only thing the doctors could figure out

was making him sick was what he was eating.

The only thing he'd been eating was--

- Krebs' baby formula!

- Yeah, it was a bad batch.

Full of bacteria. - Oh, man!

- That's horrible!

- It's worse than horrible, Irene, it's criminal.

If the baby drank enough of it, it could be fatal.

And who knows how much of that stuff is around?

Krebs!

You still worried about your ratings?

Come on, we gotta show it to him.

- And Kit, Richie, if you find another computer

you can use, call the station.

I'll tell 'em to have the camera crew ready to roll.

You just say where, come on.

- What happened here? - Come on!

You gotta tell me more about this question!

- Jerry, tell me what happened to Ralph.

- Jerry.

- I'll call the police and report the robbery, okay?

- Hey, what about that computer

that my father bought for Johnny and me?

You can program it at my house.

Look it up to the STACCOM box.

It doesn't have disk drive.

It doesn't have 48K either.

Come on, you can try.

It's not interruptive.

It doesn't have error checking.

It doesn't use hacksaws.

Yeah.

It has a membrane keyboard.

Oh, come on.

What are you going to do with the kid's computer?

I've got a cousin who's into computers, I was thinking of giving it to him.

Show it to him.

It's what I said.

All right, I'm getting it.

Hope you guys get arrested for this, okay?

We're in

I was right, he did go out and find another computer.

He's back in the system again at the Parker household.

Hurry.

Let's go.

- Good evening, America.

- Jerry Binger, live from Los Angeles.

- Unrehearsed interview, right at this very moment.

- You're doing it again.

- Now, this may be the very last time

that you ever see "Watch Out."

But folks, I guarantee you, this is a show

that you will never forget.

Now, tonight, we have a completely unrehearsed interview

with the people responsible for distributing a product

which is capable of killing thousands

of helpless, innocent babies and children.

Mr. Greg, Mr. Tomasino, Jerry Binger from Watch Out.

Now we're broadcasting live, coats to coats,

right at this very minute.

Some very serious allegations

are about to be brought up against you too,

concerning the CRIPS infant formula.

- Like hell they are.

- I don't care about it.

They're irresponsible answers to these serious allegations.

We are not providing proof of bacteria in the infant.

No, don't get away, stay with it.

See the way he wants to go out.

- All right, all right, calm down!

Get out of the way, you guys get out of the way.

- Calm down, it's over, it's over.

- Here goes Quinn!

- Lieutenant Quinn!

- You're not too late, get the computer.

- You can't say that!

Hold it! Hold it!

Like I said.

How we doin' on the other side?

Hello, we're set!

Now, ladies and gentlemen, in our viewing audience,

Proof! Proof!

That the ratings on Watch Out have been fixed!

Oh, I'm in my friend Hans' house, Hamilton Parker.

As you can see his television set is tuned to channel 8, the channel for "Watch Out".

We have a direct line into the STATCOM computer and for some reason the STATCOM computer is recording the television set as being tuned to channel 3.

That'll be all. You've done enough already.

- She's coming.

- Surprise, surprise!

- Surprise!

Sweetheart, what's wrong?

It's great, but you have them upside-down.

No.

Tomorrow at 330 Eastern, Lightweight's Howard Davis and Tyrone Crawley square off, plus World Cup skiing and more on CBS Sports Sunday.

Now stay tuned for body heat on the CBS Saturday Night Movies next following news break