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Goddamn, it's hot.

Are you done yet?

Early admissions?

Ivy Leaguers love it. Gets them all wet.

All that studying finally pays off, and you get to leave this hellhole a year early.

Damn, what is it, like 95 degrees?

Can't wait to go to college, man.

It's like natural selection. Every hot chick you meet's got a brain.

Not mine.

Not mine.

You never forget the sight of a dead body.

But then again, I was experiencing a lot of things for the first time.

I guess it's just part of growing up.

- How many calories in each stick? - 550.

How many grams of fat?

32 grams, but we do cook it in vegetable oil.

I'll take two then.

- Could I have mine extra crispy? - Sure. No problem.

It's not as hard as it looks.

All it takes is five minutes reading the manual after you get hired.

The way I saw it, as long as it was on my college application...

it was all worth it.

You just can't count on good grades to get into a decent school anymore.

Virgil and I have been friends since the fourth grade...

when he moved to my school. He was the other smart kid.

Let's go, you perv.

Dude, did you see the fucking rack on that?

Man, middle-aged hoes are the finest.

This is Han, Virgil's cousin.

He's everything Virgil's not.

You ladies ready?

I shoot 215 free throws a day.

My goal is to beat Calvin Murphy's record of 95.8%.

That's 207 baskets.

"Punctilious:

"Marked by or concerned about precise, exact accordance...

"with the details of codes or conventions."

To get a perfect score on my next SAT...

I needed to improve my verbal score by 60 points.

I picked a new word every day and repeated it over and over again.

They say if you repeat something enough times, it becomes part of you.

Stephanie Vandergosh.

It's girls like her that make you realise that life's not fair.

I swear, I saw her in a porn.

What are you babbling about?

Daric Loo, academic all-star.

But don't let the letterman jacket fool you. It's for tennis.

Hey, so we're using your credit card, right?

If we get caught, I'm saying you stole it from me.

Nigga, please.

The amoeba is a primitive and simple organism...

which absorbs its prey...

and incorporates it into itself.

Miss Vandergosh and Miss Nabham...

is there something you would like to share with the class?

I thought as much.

Mr. Farmer, please switch seats with Miss Vandergosh.

Now that I have your complete attention...

today we will see a movie.

It is entitled The Amoeba.

Lunch time was club time.

This was where everyone loaded up...

on their extracurricular activities for their college app.

And, of course, Daric was the president of every club.

But, being part of an ecology club, it's important that we do.

Unfortunately, all the really worthwhile things about high school...

were few and far between.

She is right down the hall.

What I'm most concerned about are the abrasions on her arms and her back.

"It was my fault. I fell down some stairs.

"But I feel fine now."

Don't get me wrong.

I think there's some fine-looking bitches in high school.

- But they're so stingy about giving it up. - Dude, you're a fucking virgin.

Dude, I can get laid whenever I want to.

Any time, anywhere, any place.

Yeah, by who, your middle-aged aunt?

No, but your mom's been looking mighty fine lately.

- Shut the fuck up. - Especially with those...

What was that thing she bought the other day?

Okay, it comes to $482.82.

- Is your brother Carl? - Yeah.

I thought you looked familiar. I'm Virgil. I was in Cub Scouts with your brother.

This is my friend, Ben.

- Hi. - Hey.

- So, what're you doing these days? - I just got out of college.

- What was your major? - Theatre.

Theatre. That's... I love the theatre, you know.

- It's a-- - Sign here.

That makes you, like, a thespian, right?

You know, you have that, like, kind of an X factor.

That charisma thing. You definitely got it going.

Thanks.

Well, it was nice seeing you again.

Yeah. So, plays...

- Let me know if you're ever in one or-- - Virg.

- Okay. - Yeah.

Yeah, cool.

- What the fuck was that? - What?

- You're gonna get us caught! - Watch it!

Like she's gonna go for you.

At least I try.

That's enough, girls.

We were always pissed at Virgil...

but we always let it slide.

We had to. He's like the little puppy that keeps shitting on the carpet.

Hey, Virg, what colour are the stickers today, man?

- Wake up! - Orange.

Give them up.

Let's go.

Fuck you.

- Hi. - Hi.

It's my little brother...

and he came home with all this computer stuff we can't afford.

- So, my mom, you know... - Yeah. Do you have a receipt?

It started with a pack of baseball cards...

and then it snowballed.

I guess it just felt good to do things...

that I couldn't put on my college application.

Besides, it was suburbia. We had nothing better to do.

Our straight A's were our alibis, our passports to freedom.

Going to a study group would get us out of the house until 4:00 in the morning.

As long as our grades were there, we were trusted.

We had it all.

Well, almost.

"Uncap the needle.

"Swab the finger with the rubbing alcohol.

"Prick the finger."

Come on, Ben.

On three.

One.

See, that wasn't so bad.

All right, let's go. Come on, now.

Run! Come on, now.

Get down, run.

Stay low when you make that pass.

Got to get in front of him. In front of him!

Dive, come on! Who wants that ball? Who wants it?

Don't stand up. Do not stand up.

Make two, we'll go home.

Hey, Stephanie.

Hey, Ben.

- How's it going? - Good.

How's your finger?

I'll live.

- You have a Band-Aid on it. - Yeah.

It's a pinprick.

Don't you want to be a doctor or something?

If I don't play pro basketball.

Aren't you a little short?

Only the size of your heart matters.

That's corny.

What about you? What do you want to be?

A cop.

Really? Aren't you a little too short?

Not when I have this.

You're late.

Sorry.

And you're not wearing a helmet.

Ben, this is my boyfriend, Steve.

Steve, this is Ben, my lab partner.

Oh, yeah. I have something for you.

What is this?

This isn't even due until next week.

- I had some free time so I thought that-- - We're lab partners.

We're supposed to do this together.

Give me a call. We'll meet to do the assignment.

- Let's go. - Later.

It's amazing what the right piece of clothing can do for your image.

I knew it was all bullshit, but, hell...

I was milking it for all it was worth.

At first it didn't matter that I rarely saw any playing time.

I was part of the team.

But like everything else in life, you get sick of it.

At least it'll look good on my college app.

Okay.

Ain't no party like a Wildcat party!

Ain't no party like a Wildcat party!

Look at that ass.

- Yeah. - What's up, Ben?

- Hey, Daric. - Hey, you got a sec?

- I'm trying to finish up this assignment. - Okay.

So, Ben, how do you feel about being a benchwarmer?

- What? - Well, you don't get to play much, right?

Yeah, but we all have our roles on the team.

And what is your role?

I don't know. I just hustle.

Then how come you don't get to play in the games?

It's up to the coach.

How do you feel about being the token Asian on the team?

What?

It's obvious to everyone the only reason...

that you're on the team is for cosmetic ones.

That's bullshit. I bust my ass to be on this team.

- But you never get to play. - So what? I'm still on the team.

Your coach could've picked anyone he wanted to just to sit on the bench.

Maybe you should just ask him then.

Okay, awesome. Thanks, buddy.

Hey, Takashi, can you give me a few close-ups and a couple of wides?

Yeah, you got it.

Hi, is Stephanie home?

- Hi. - Hey.

Stephanie, I just want to apologise for--

Ben, I'm in three honour classes...

and I have a 3.8 GPA.

I know, and I'm sorry.

I couldn't find the traits to phylum chordata in the book.

It's not in the book. It was in his lecture.

See? It was last Tuesday's lecture.

This one is more of a non-sexual cell division.

Right. Okay.

And that's when mitosis happens...

- That was one, anaphase? - Anaphase.

And then metaphase, interphase and prophase.

- You got it. - Yes. Okay.

I think you're right. Let me just make sure.

When I'm right, I'm right.

You're right.

Hello? Hey, Steve-o.

Ben and I are working on our bio homework.

Yes, I'm sure.

Can you hold on a minute?

I'll be right back.

Yeah. What?

Do you want something to drink?

Are you okay?

Yeah.

- Where are you going? - It's getting pretty late.

But we haven't gone through meiosis yet.

Well, I could stay.

Thanks.

Okay, meiosis.

Hey, Ben.

Be there for you, man, every game.

We want Ben. We want Ben.

Daric ended up writing an article about me.

He even won some kind of journalism award for it.

It was some bullshit article about affirmative action...

in school sports to rile everyone up.

We want Ben! We want Ben!

But I had to give it to him. The article worked.

If anyone at school didn't know...

what affirmative action was, they did now.

Ben, get in.

Go on. Get the fuck in there.

Yeah!

Math or verbal?

What the fuck do you want?

So how does it feel to be famous?

Come on. Why'd you quit the team?

I was doing my job.

You call that piece-of-shit article journalism?

You didn't even interview my coach for his views.

I did.

He didn't say what I wanted him to...

so I didn't put it in the story.

Fucking prick.

It's just an article.

If you really liked what you were doing...

you should have just kept on playing.

And have everybody think I'm on the team because I'm some token player?

Who cares what other people think?

Yeah? People also think that you gave Mr. Reid head...

to be the editor of the school paper.

Well, I still am the editor.

God. Fuck off.

You know this is all bullshit, right?

It's just a game.

People like you and me, we don't have to play by the rules.

We can make our own.

- Do this by tomorrow, you get $50. - What?

Hey, I don't just ask anyone to do this.

Cheat sheets?

It's easy money.

Ben, it's easier than fuck.

It's better than this sorry-ass job.

See you tomorrow.

Hey, Ben.

Hey.

I'm getting my Diet Coke. You guys want anything?

Yeah. Get me a root beer float to go.

I got it.

- Trig? - Yeah.

Excuse me. There's no smoking allowed in this café.

California state law.

Sorry.

Can't wait until I get out.

What are you majoring in in college?

Bio.

- Doing any internships? - No.

I know some people. I'll give them a call.

Cool.

You like Steph.

What?

You want to take her to the winter formal?

Isn't that your job?

I don't get into all that bullshit.

Why? Are you a fag or something?

What do you think?

Hey.

Thanks.

Thanks, honey.

Okay, I'll see you soon?

Okay. Which species should we start with?

I was...

thinking about Chapter Eight.

"Temerity. Noun.

"Unwise boldness; rash or reckless behaviour."

Nice. Good job.

Oh, shit. Sorry, dude.

Hey, man. What's going on? Popcorn?

So how much did we actually earn last year at the car wash?

Like $400 or something.

- So that's only like $400. - Let's try.

We only got that one day to do it, so...

You guys mind if we have a moment? Me and Ben?

Yeah. Okay.

- Okay, but we've got to talk about this. - Sure. Thanks.

- What's up? - Hey.

Sweet.

Aren't you gonna check it?

Nah. I trust you.

- Should we get going? - Yeah.

Academic decathlon was huge.

The most prized entry on a college application.

This was not like some community service club...

where you just walk in and sign up.

You had to earn your spot.

- Pygmy mouse lemur. - Excellent.

Tetrahydrocannabinol.

Jersey, Guernsey and Albany.

Hands by your side. Check.

Portugal!

- I didn't ask a question. - Sorry!

- Bohemia, Moravia and Silesia. - Correct.

- Johnson. - Excellent.

You're right.

- Another language that-- - Tokyo, Japan.

Excellent. Correct.

Hey.

See you in class.

Good job, man.

What're you talking about? I got my ass kicked.

No, you knew the answers. You've just got to get the timing down.

$50 if you do it by tomorrow.

Dude, I think we got enough.

Stop bitching. Just a few more blocks.

- Did I tell you? I got it. - Got what?

Remember I told you I saw Stephanie Vandergosh in a porn?

- Yeah. - I got it.

Shut the fuck up.

I'll show you right now, fool.

Oh, my God.

You've been hanging around that Daric guy, right?

Yeah.

- Is it true that he has his own house? - I don't know.

Han told me that his parents don't live here.

They're in Vancouver or something.

So what?

You know what I could do if I had my own pad?

Jerk off at the dinner table?

- Your turn. - Fucker.

What? No hot tub?

You tell them, if they want me...

they're gonna ante up with that hot tub!

Tracy, what are you doing here?

Well, I can give you a special Tracy massage.

- See? I told you, punk ass. - No.

It's just the uniform.

It's got to be her.

- Oh, yes, Tracy. - Yeah.

Work those pom-poms.

I dare you to ask her boyfriend.

- White dude, right? - No.

Thank God.

Oh, yeah. Shake those pom-poms.

Ben?

You think you can talk to Daric for me about doing the cheat sheets?

- How do you know about it? - I hear things.

Han told me.

Fucking Daric's a senior. Someone's got to take over when he leaves.

All right, the topic is population control.

Why retarded children and handicapped people should be executed...

in order to keep the population down.

Ready?

- Is that true? - I think it was.

Because it didn't sound like you knew it.

Make sure your glasses are anti-glare, okay? Let's see.

Decathlon practices were held at Daric's house.

His methods were definitely unconventional but effective.

Beautiful.

Rock, scissors, paper. Oh, fuck.

I'm so unworthy at this moment.

Dude, you're gonna explode, man. Don't light that shit.

Come on.

- Good-bye, guys. - Study hard.

Come on.

Not bad for academic decathlon.

Han had a friend named Jesus who helped him steal...

bribe or do whatever it took to get the test sheets for us.

I talked to Daric and he was cool with Virgil coming on board.

Between the five of us, there wasn't anything we couldn't do.

The money was really good...

but I don't think that's what attracted me the most.

Okay.

They got lucky.

But, you know, there is no reason a team of that calibre...

should be able to beat us. God.

Mary! Where's your tie?

I mean, our presentation absolutely sucked.

We looked like idiots.

Rich, privey fucks.

Press the button.

Wait till the question is asked.

We're getting locked out and we can't even answer the question.

God. Ben.

- Fucking twinkie. - American history specialist.

The answer was 1973, not '76.

- How many more, Ben? - Would you shut up?

I told you guys not to come.

- So how's Stephanie? - Virg.

Stephanie Vandergosh? I'm going out with her Friday night.

I asked her out last week.

- Does she know it's a date? - Why?

- Want to lay some money down on it? - Yeah.

How about an even $100?

Okay, you got it.

Fucking A.

You motherfucker.

- This is fucked. - Hey, Daric wanted us to see it.

You know she has a boyfriend.

Well, this'll teach that fuckhead to keep his mouth shut.

Oh, fuck.

Is that the guy from the privey school?

What does he think he is, some Chinese movie star?

"Hi, I am Chow Yun-Fat."

"Hi. I thought I was gonna be fucking your girlfriend tonight.

"I guess not. I guess I better go home...

"and stroke myself really good."

- Let's go. - Really, really good.

Hey, hold on, I'm just getting started.

Get the fuck off my car.

Damn, dude.

You got to tell Stephanie...

her boyfriend's boning some white chick.

It's none of my business.

What the fuck are you talking about?

You tell her and you get bonus points.

I'm not gonna be some rat. Besides, I don't even know for sure.

Come on, Ben. Look...

This is for buddies.

- So? - And this is where he had his hands...

- which is for lovers. - God! Get off me!

Am I right, Han?

Daric, where you going?

Fuck her, man. Let's go drink.

Shit. No, Daric!

- Whose party is this? - Susie Berk's.

- Are we invited? - Get out of my way, man.

You don't need an invitation. Just hear about it and you go.

They're all fucking drunk, anyway.

So, is everyone buzzed?

Yo, can I have a light?

Thanks, dude.

Let's go around back.

Hey, how's it going?

Now I'm gonna throw up.

Hey, what's up, boys?

I think they have Bible study next door, right?

Oh, shit, no, look at this!

It's the Chinese Jordan!

Hey, so, what's up, man? Where's all your fan club at, man?

I'm going to go check on Virg.

Yo, what's up, shithead?

Are you going to step up?

You know, you got to play a real sport to wear that jacket.

Yeah, fuck him up, Ryan!

Want your mom? You want the cops?

- You're what? - I'm sorry!

- What? - I'm sorry.

Shoot him in the face.

If I ever see you and your fuck-jock friends...

I'll fucking kill you!

Back off, man, back off!

You want some of this?

- Back off, man! - Ben, come on!

Back off!

Come on, Ben!

Come on, Ben!

Fuck you, man! Screw you!

Let's go!

Fucking A, that was better than sex.

Just shut the fuck up.

Did you see the look on that guy's face?

You put the fear of God in him, man. The fear of gods.

I went jihad on his ass, man.

You see this blood on me, man? It's not my blood.

Did you see his face when we worked on him?

It was like...

Man, when you pulled out that gun, it was fucking awesome.

That was, like, boom!

Right in your face.

He probably pissed himself right then in front of all his homies.

Not me, man. I was going off.

I felt like, surging through my body.

How smooth was that? Man, you had fucking balls!

That was fucking smooth!

The next minute, the gun was right in his face, and I was going off.

Shit.

If my dad finds out, he's going to kill me.

Man, I'm going to juvie!

By Monday, the word had spread...

and pretty much everyone knew about it.

I was sure the cops were gonna come and get us that morning...

but it never happened.

- Meeting today at 3:00. - Why?

We have to do this chem test.

It's a big one, about 100 students.

Hi, guys.

- Hey. - Hey.

- Ben, can I talk to you? - Yeah.

He's fucking whipped already.

- What's up? - I just talked to Steve.

Yeah?

What?

He said you're taking me to the formal.

You're fucking with me, right?

He said that you guys agreed to have you take me to the formal.

He did ask, I didn't agree. The whole thing was pretty weird.

You should have at least told me.

He's your boyfriend. I didn't want to get involved.

Ben, that's what friends do.

God, I don't believe this. Why do I always get shit on?

You know, Steve, he's the one that needs to stop.

Ben, I'm just trying to understand this.

I'm out of here.

What the fuck?

What? The formal?

What, got a hot date with Barbie that night?

Look, I'm not gonna say anything, all right, it's none of my business.

I just think she deserves better.

You're probably right.

As our reputation grew, scams started coming to us...

usually through Jesus.

There they are.

What I liked about it was that we were in control.

If someone came to us about a scam...

and we didn't like them, we'd just tell them to fuck off.

Having that kind of power quickly became an addiction.

What's up?

How's it going, man?

- What's going on? - How are you doing?

Man, not too bad.

This is Peter.

So, what's up?

Peter's got a sweet deal.

The school's getting in all-new computer parts next week.

So?

They've got to store them for a while until they can install them.

- Peter's got the school codes. - Can they trace the code?

No, it's all the same number for everyone.

What about that family in the trailer guarding the school?

That's me and my dad.

He's out by 10:00.

It's easy.

I don't know. Sounds too easy.

Dude, I guarantee.

No offence, I don't give a shit about your guarantee.

Me and Ben checked it out. Seems legit.

Han, think you can sell this shit off?

I can always sell the shit off.

We'll think about it.

Peter, let's go.

You got the phone?

God. Fuck.

It's clear.

We had the run of the place.

Rumours about us came and went fast and furious.

One had us linked with some Chinese Mafia.

And it was fine with us...

because it just put more fear in everyone.

Along with that power came greed.

It just made sense to expand our business into drugs...

putting the law of supply and demand into practice.

I think our teacher would've been proud.

Let me see this thing.

Fuck off.

It's got no name brand on it.

Shit.

Sorry, Virg.

Fucking dick.

Stop crying. It's a piece-of-shit CD player anyway.

Fuck you!

Here.

Now you can buy three of them.

I soon learned that along with an image came maintenance.

I needed something to help expand my days.

It's literally a full-time job to make people believe...

who you're supposed to be.

Four cheat sheets a day, the drugs, the scams:

Between this and all my club commitments...

I couldn't even start my homework until 1:00 a.m.

We were making so much money, we couldn't spend it fast enough.

If it was for sale, you could bet we tried to buy it.

Is that enough? All right.

- Hey, Tracy. Thanks, it's all there. - Thank you.

So, what are you guys?

A club.

Oh, like a math club or something?

We partied every weekend and hung out with different crowds.

It's funny, the more notorious we became...

the more invitations we got.

We didn't know half the people we partied with...

but they knew us.

"Quixotic. Adjective.

"Extravagantly idealistic...

"unpredictable; unrealistic or imaginary."

Shit.

You look like shit.

$50.

Oh, yeah.

Here's the number for that internship I was telling you about.

Thanks.

You want some?

You happy, Ben?

I'm serious. You happy?

I don't know.

Fuck.

That's the most truthful thing I've ever heard.

At least you have a choice.

- You're not happy? - I'm very happy.

Isn't it obvious? I have everything.

Loving parents, top grades...

Ivy League scholarships, of course, Stephanie.

Of course.

Right there. That's it.

I'm so fucking happy, I can't stop it.

Why not?

It's a never-ending cycle.

When you got everything you want, what's left?

You can't settle for being happy, that's a fucking trap.

You gotta take life into your own hands.

Do whatever it takes to break the cycle.

That's what it is, breaking the cycle.

You're fucked.

I envy you.

What?

What? What?

It was my 17th birthday.

No shit, man.

Fuck, man. I don't want to touch that with my hands, man.

There he is.

Hey, ass-wipe, you're the one that organised this...

"Keep the Beach Clean" shit and you're late.

I need to talk to you guys.

Grab a bag.

- Where's Han? - Sleeping.

What's up?

This better be fucking good.

I want out.

Out of what?

I can't handle this anymore.

Look, I woke up and my sheets were covered in blood.

Why don't you stop OD-ing on that shit, you fuck?

Yeah, too much of that shit will get to you.

I don't want to do it anymore. All of it.

Fuck, Ben, stop being a pussy.

Whatever, Virg.

So is that it?

I just want to concentrate on my own stuff.

Hell, I was thinking the same thing.

- Give it up? - Yeah.

Fuck it. It's like a job, man.

The only reason I did it was for you guys.

What are you saying?

Have you two lost your fucking balls?

Fuck it. Han and I will do it. Right, Han?

It's all yours, man.

- We gotta talk. - Just shut the fuck up.

More money for us.

I'm gonna call Jesus right after this.

Organise this shit.

Well, happy birthday, man.

Thanks.

We all chipped in.

Pretty cool, huh?

- Jesus Christ! - Shit! Fuck!

Hey!

"Temperance. Noun.

"Signifying self-restraint or moderation...

"in action and statement."

Hi, Stephanie.

Hi.

You need help?

I'm okay.

You know, I hate doing those S's.

The curves make it tough, but I know a trick.

You work it inside out.

See?

So, what's this I hear about you, gangster boy?

Oh, God, that's such old news.

Rumours have it you guys did a number on Ryan.

Do you believe them?

Let's put it this way, there's also a rumour that I am in a porno.

- Oh, yeah, I've seen it. - Shut up.

- I really have. - Really?

So the shooting arm is perpendicular to the body?

Bend your knees and follow through.

Is that it? I'm hungry.

Excuse me, sir. There's no food allowed in the store.

Oh, I'm sorry. I'm hypoglycaemic.

I just need a little something to get my blood sugar going.

I just got a couple more bites left.

Okay.

You think you can get away with anything, don't you?

No.

Well, yeah, if you're clever enough.

You sound just like Steve.

You don't like him much, do you?

Speaking of Steve...

you still need a date for the formal?

Are you asking?

Well, if you'll go with me.

Oh, yeah.

Holy shit.

I guess I was clever enough, thank you very much.

A week later Han got suspended from school...

for distributing cheat sheets.

It appeared Virgil's position as head of the outfit...

had gone to his head.

He was babbling to so many people about it...

the school had to do something.

The funny thing was...

Han didn't really care that he got suspended.

I think it just gave him yet another excuse to beat the crap out of Virgil.

- Hey. - Hey.

- You look great. - You look great.

Jinx.

Two for flinching.

- Here. - Thank you.

So, do you know your real parents?

Do you want to?

My parents I have now are my real parents.

I don't know. Maybe when I get older.

I still have to find out who I am.

You sound so mature.

That's what my therapist tells me, at least.

Thanks for asking, though.

I had a wonderful time.

- Thanks again. - Yeah.

All right, Question 6:

name of the largest commercial transport jet.

Virgil!

The Space Guppy.

Where the fuck is he, man?

Hey, open up, man.

Where the fuck you going, man, on a honeymoon?

- No, man. I got my accessories. - Yeah, what, your anal intruder?

No, my lubrication. Cause you're so dry, Daric.

Don't slam the trunk either, man.

Hey, yo! Motherfucker.

As we headed off to Vegas for the decathlon nationals...

Stephanie was all I could think about.

I finally decided that there were two things I could do:

go on agonising over Stephanie...

or just say "fuck it" and have fun.

Vegas sucks.

Hey, turn that down.

The sound is the best part.

Ben, Virgil, I want you to meet Rachel.

Hey. Hi.

- You're Ben? - Yeah.

What are you studying?

Econ.

- Econ? - Yeah.

Brother, today is your lucky day.

What?

Go get 'em.

All right, sweetie, here are the rules.

No kissing, and I always lead.

Come on, sweetie.

How was it?

How was it?

- Oh, you bad, bad boy. - That is so disgusting, man.

Come on, man.

Actually, it was...

incredible.

I just couldn't believe I had finally done it.

It was such a relief.

I had prayed every day up until that moment...

that I would have sex before I died.

Thank you.

Dude, man, wasn't she awesome?

Wasn't she awesome, man?

Dude, what the fuck?

Here you go.

Fuck! God damn it!

Your little friend pulled a gun on me.

Calm down!

- Shut up, Virg! - Fuck you.

Look, this is more money than we owe you.

Fuck all of you.

What the hell are you doing? You crazy?

She said she wanted to play rough.

- You want to play fucking rough? - Stop it!

- I want to play rough. - Virgil, put the gun down.

- Virgil, put the gun down. - What do you think now, hotshot?

Virg, put the gun down.

Get the fuck off me.

The morning after I lost my virginity...

we won the national title.

I don't sell that shit no more.

That's cool.

How have you been?

- Haven't seen you since the-- - Formal.

Right.

Hey, by the way, I never got a chance to thank you for taking Stephanie.

She said she had the best time.

Maybe you can take her to all the school functions.

You should try it. You might like it.

It's all a superficial, bullshit waste of time.

Yeah, you mentioned that.

I have a proposition for you.

- Actually, for you and your buddies. - That's all in the past.

Listen, you guys are definitely going to like this. It's too sweet.

No, thanks.

Well, give me the other guys' digits.

- I thought we were friends. - That has nothing to do with this.

There's going to be a lot of money involved.

You already got all the money you need.

Change.

I don't give a shit about the cash.

It's what we've been talking about. It's time to break the cycle.

What?

Listen, this is going to better everyone involved.

Just trust me.

Ben, did he tell you what this is all about?

No.

Fucking rich boy.

Let's talk outside.

- Steve, this is Virgil. - Hey.

Han.

- David, right? - Daric.

Sorry. How's your stroke?

My stroke?

- You guys want something to drink? - Yeah, I'll take a beer.

Beer.

Okay.

Have a seat. I'll be right back.

What's up with that guy? Stroke?

- Congrats on winning the nationals. - Thank you.

- What happened to you guys? - Too many freshmen.

Their fucking brains froze in the semis.

What are you going to do?

The streak had to end sometime.

So, why are we here?

You're looking at it.

What?

We do my parents' house.

- Yo, that's fucked up. - Why?

- It's none of your fucking business. - Okay.

Let's go, guys.

Everyone needs a wake-up call.

I love them. That's why I'm doing this.

"I love them. That's why I'm doing this."

That dude's fucked up.

Let's do it.

- Let's fucking do it. - No.

No. We're not gonna rob anyone.

Everyone needs a wake-up call. That's what he said, right?

Let's fucking give it to him.

Look, that shit is just weird.

Oh, yeah, it is.

We're gonna play along for a while...

and then we're gonna teach that fucker a lesson.

Virg, don't you see the way that guy talks to you?

That dude doesn't even think you're on the same level.

Think about it.

What about you, Han?

That rich motherfucker wants to punish his own family? Why?

Because Mommy and Daddy won't pay enough attention to him?

And you.

He thinks you're fucking dickless.

Well, why else would he let you take his girlfriend to the formal?

No.

No!

We'll just rough him up a little bit.

Mostly, we'll scare the shit out of him.

Dude, this is brilliant.

After we beat the shit out of him we could turn him in to the cops...

- for conspiring to rob his own family. - Exactly.

Come on, guys.

- I don't know. - Come on!

Let's do it! It'll be fun.

I'm just doing this so you don't fuck this up, all right?

Yeah.

No, I can't.

This'll be our blueprint.

Let's start on Page 3.

By the way, I'm going to need a gun.

I know. I'm working on it.

Can you get one of those semiautomatics?

It'll cost you.

Just take it out of my share.

No. We'll need the money up front.

All right. Just let me know how much.

No problem.

Steve was meticulous.

He had mapped out each of our paths for the robbery.

He made us do it over and over until he felt we got it.

I just don't know what Stephanie found so attractive.

- At all. - So, Han, you think you can break in?

Fuck, yeah.

That's it.

I can't handle it anymore. I ain't going to the meeting tomorrow.

Shut up!

Look, we all have to do it, or it'll just fuck it all up.

Well, I still ain't going!

Dude, why?

Because Chrissy's throwing a party tomorrow.

Why don't we just invite him to come?

He's the one who said we should get to know each other.

Whatever.

You think he'll show?

Who cares, man?

At least we don't have to sit through all that bullshit.

I can't wait till this is all over.

You watch. It'll all be worth it.

Be right back.

- Hey, Steph. - Hey, Ben.

- Where's Steve? - I don't know.

He told me to meet him here. He's on time, as usual.

Hey.

Whoa. Is it real?

Just got it done this morning.

- What does it mean? - It's my Chinese name.

Why you guys hiding out from everyone?

- Hey. - Hey.

- Hello. - Hey.

Yo, D-Rock!

- Is that your new tattoo? - Yeah.

You gonna show me?

- Later. - When did you get it?

This morning.

You all right?

- Hey, Steph. - What up, man?

What up, dude?

- So this is where the Asians hang out. - Yup. Library was closed.

Hey, you're a funny guy.

For an Oriental.

He's been drinking.

Daric, where you going to go to college next year?

I just turned in my apps last month. What about you?

It'll be an Ivy League for sure. I don't know which yet.

- You already got in? - Yeah, of course.

You'll have to excuse Steve. He gets cocky when he's drunk.

Only when he's drunk?

Excuse me, guys. Too much testosterone.

Did I say something?

So, this is like the "I love Stephanie" fan club.

Daric, you're a pretty cool guy.

I can't believe Steph thought you were a stalker or something.

- Yo, what'd you think of her friend? - What friend?

- The one she brought to mini golf. - All right.

Isn't Steph the best?

- You want a drink? - Yeah, whatever you get.

- All right. Ben? - I'm good.

Thanks, D-Rock.

Anytime, Stevie-boy.

Why you hang out with him, Ben?

He's got something up his ass all the time.

He's all right.

Steph's the one.

Steph's the one.

You were right.

She deserves to be treated better. I'm going to treat her better.

I owe it all to you, man. Thank you.

- Steve, you're wasted. - Thanks, man.

Okay. You're welcome.

All right.

- I'll be right back. - Okay. Thank you.

At that point, by the look in Daric's eyes...

I knew it was on.

It was New Year's Eve.

Jesus said we could use his house if we paid him $100.

His parents had left for Tahoe a day earlier.

I still thought it was a bad idea.

So the guys and I made a compromise.

All I had to do was be the lookout.

- Hey. - Hey.

They're right around back in the garage. I'll be in there in a sec.

Fuck.

What's up, fellas?

So you got the cash?

Of course. Got my gun?

This is your wake-up call.

For your mommy and daddy.

Fuck!

Get the gun!

Han, get the gun!

Shit!

Oh, God.

Fuck!

Don't!

Ben.

Ben!

What the fuck?

We didn't agree to this.

This is going to cost you extra.

We're going to have to get rid of the body.

What do you mean?

- Jesus, what about your backyard? - No way.

I promise no one will ever know.

$300.

Come on, guys, dish it up.

Shit! You guys got any money?

Virg?

Here. $150. I'll get you the rest tomorrow, all right?

Fuck, no. You pay me now.

Here, $300.

Can I have the wallet too?

Fuck!

Oh, shit.

He's still alive.

Someone hold him up.

Virg, please, hold him up.

It's going to be okay, Ben.

It's going to be just fine.

Oh, fuck.

- You got him, Virg? - Yeah.

Hold him up. Hold his head up. Hold it up. Tilt it back, okay?

- Okay. - Let me open his mouth.

All right. It's going to be fine, Ben. It's going to be just fine.

Oh, shit.

Just hold him down.

- Christ! - Virg, it's okay.

Listen to me. Just hang on, okay?

It'll be just fine. Just hang on to him!

- Just hang on! - Jesus fucking Christ!

Whatever you do, just hang on!

It's okay. It'll be okay.

It'll be okay, Virg.

Just a few more seconds. Just breathe.

Just hang on!

Are you all right, Ben?

- Ben. - Hey, Stephanie.

- Happy New Year. - Happy New Year.

Are you okay?

I'm just mad at Steve.

For what?

He totally stood me up.

I know he hates these things, but still.

All right, everybody! Let's get crazy!

It's almost New Year!

Ten, nine, eight...

I guess neither of us are getting a kiss tonight?

...five, four, three, two, one!

I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to...

Don't apologise.

I need to talk to Steve.

Well, the guys are waiting.

Thanks, Ben.

Happy New Year.

Shit.

Ben, will you take him out of here?

Fuck, man! Get the fuck out of here.

Jesus, would you help us, please?

Jesus.

I knew what I had to do.

The right thing to do was to call the police and tell them everything.

It was right, but it didn't mean it was easy.

Yo, Virg, I'm here. Let's go, man.

Stop jerking off, let's go.

Yo, Virg, stop fucking around, man. Open the door.

Virg, open the fucking door, man!

I said open the door!

Virg, open the fucking door, Virg!

Han said Virgil had called him over to watch some new porn.

I guess Virg just didn't have enough balls to do it alone.

Virg!

Fuck you, Virg!

Open this fucking door!

So, what is he going to be, retarded or something?

Ben, get him the fuck out of here before I kick his ass.

Come on, Daric.

Come on.

Wait, Ben, you think Virg is going to talk?

What if he does?

Dude, what are we going to do?

Nothing.

Okay. Let me think.

Why did you write that article about me?

What?

The newspaper article. Why did you write it?

What are you talking about, man? I'm trying to fucking think here.

Wait.

Do you think Han will be with us?

Later, Daric.

Ben, call you later.

Nice.

You haven't seen Steve, have you?

Steve?

Get in.

He's been gone for a couple days, and he's got everyone worried.

Are you worried?

Yeah, but you just never know what Steve's up to.

Ben, thanks for putting up with this.

- What? - The whole thing with me and Steve.

You know how you make decisions that lead to other decisions?

Yeah.

Then you realise...

you don't remember why you made those decisions in the first place?

Yeah.

When I saw you on New Year's Eve...

I knew there was only one right thing to do.

For the first time in my life...

I don't know what my future will hold.

I don't even know what the other guys are going to do.

All I know is that...

there's no turning back.