Original subtitles

Hey, missus!

Hey!

Imagine I lump Christians...

George Bush, the Pope, Henrik Larsson and Willie the Janny all into one person.

You'd laugh. Why? Cos it's dumb.

But that's exactly what the West does with Islam.

As if one billion Muslims in 50 countries with hundreds of different languages

and countless ethnic groups are all one and the same.

Take my family.

My sister considers herself as a Muslim first.

And because she has a political streak, calls herself black.

My dad's been in this country for over... 40 years and is 100% Pakistani.

Or so he thinks.

I reject the West's definition of terrorism,

which excludes the hundreds of thousands of victims of state terror.

I reject the West's claim of moral high ground

after two of its main Jesus-lovers tore up the UN charter.

But above all...

I reject the West's simplification...

of a Muslim.

I am a Glaswegian...

Pakistani, teenager, woman.

Woman of Muslim descent... who...

supports...

Glasgow Rangers in a Catholic School.

Cos I'm a dazzling mixture and I'm proud of it.

I call on this house to defeat this hypocritical motion!

Bring it on! Yes!

Look at the state of you, mate! Celtic! Yeah!

Get your tits out, get your tits out, get your tits out for the lads! Get your tits out...

I can call you back. Call you back.

Grow up, guys.

- Give me my bag! - Ho, what's going on here?

Another fucking coconut!

- Shut it, you. Beat it. - Fuck off. Where's my top? Give us it back!

- Nothing worse than an uptight Paki! - You what?

- Uptight Paki Hun! - Fuck off!

- Argh! - Give us that here.

Here. Get in the car. Calm down and get in.

Here.

Aye, f et in the motor!

- Fuck's sake, man! - They fucking started it!

- Would you just calm down? - Oh, disgusting little shite!

Tahara, calm down! Tahara! Come back!

I'm gonna kill you!

There's no running in the corridor, OK?

- I'm gonna get youse! - Tahara, come back!

Hey, come back! Come back here! Stop!

- I'll fucking kill you! - Tahara!

Oi!

Come on, out the way, gang. For God's sake!

Shit! Listen, go to the right, go to the right!

I'm gonna kick youse in the balls!

- Whereabouts did these guys go? - What, sir?

- The guys who were running up here just now! - Up the stairs.

What's going on?

'Scuse me!

Tahara!

Excuse me!

- Thank you! - Calm down.

Can you two sit down now, thank you? And you two, outside.

- What on earth are you doing? - It was not our fault.

I don't care, Dan. Get out. And you can wait for me as well. Get out now!

Are you OK?

Is this someone you want to be with?

This is my brother. He was only picking me up. It's not his fault.

I take it they insulted you.

Something like that.

They looked pretty scared.

I'm sorry, miss.

It's OK.

Come on, let's go.

Careful you don't drop it.

Sorry.

Come on, let's go.

Right, Jacqueline... on with the lesson.

You've got a competition to win.

That gives you the perspective.

- Is that this side, this one? - Aye, that's the garden there.

- Right. - I suggest we start pegging it out.

From that corner. Then you'll get an idea of what it's gonna look like.

- OK, so, are we gonna do it? - Aye, let's do that.

- Hold on to it. OK, so I go? - Aye, aye.

One, two, three, four, five.

- Right, now what? - That's the steps you're gonna take, OK.

- Following that line, six steps that way. - OK.

- One, two, three, four... - Dad!

- ...five, six. - Dad, watch Mum's plants!

- Hey, Casim, come here. - What are you doing?

- Stand in there? - In the plants?

Yeah. Stand here.

- Are you sure? - Yeah, yeah.

And stand there.

- We're gonna get shot, Dad. - Just you come in.

Come on, you stand there. Now, big Danny...

- Right, where are you? - Right, I'm here.

- Where are you? What is there? - This is a kitchen corner. The wall.

- I thought it was a games room, Mr Khan? - Games room? Listen...

We're gonna have a bedroom and a living room for his wife-to-be. You not hear me?

We're gonna come down through there into the kitchen.

Again, keel and board, line of the house, three steps down that way.

- Easy on the flowers. - Wait a minute. OK, right...

Don't worry about flowers. Let me get on with it.

- Two, three. - Dad, get your big feet off!

Wee one! Tahara, come here.

Look, you just come here and listen to me.

- She's gonna go off her head, man! - See bloody kids, they don't listen!

Right, just stand there. What is it?

You're either gonna have an extension, missus, or you're gonna have a garden.

You cannot have both of them.

Once the extension is built, we'll make more flowers and more gardens. Don't worry.

Just you go in there.

- Right, Danny, what do I do? - Starting to get...

We're starting to get an idea of it now.

From that position, we're gonna follow this line again.

- This line there? - One step out here. Keep that line.

Right, Roddie... Roddie, come here. Never mind tea. Stand there.

- This'll cost you extra, Mr Khan. - Right, OK.

So you've met the bedroom with the kitchen. You're coming down this line.

Keep it in mind. Get a sense of it. This way. Three steps.

- Same size of steps you've been taking. - OK, right. One, two, three. Ow!

Hi.

- I don't think you'll remember me. - Tahara's brother.

- Elsie, see you later, OK. - I owe you a new guitar, Miss Hanlon.

That's very thoughtful of you.

- What do you want me to do with it? - Well, the music room's locked up now.

- Shall I leave it in your car for you? - You could, if I had one.

I'll take it. Here...

- Where is it you stay? - On the other side of the city.

- I'll give you a lift. - No, I'll manage.

I'll give you a lift. Your hand looks full.

- Are you sure? - Of course.

Could you do me a favour? Duck down for a second?

- What? - Please, duck down for a second.

- Are you serious? - Quickly, please.

- See that takeaway there? - I can't from here, no.

It's my mum's cousin's aunt's son's, or something like that.

If they see me in the car with a strange woman, there's gonna be trouble.

Can I come up now?

Yeah.

- Thanks. - That's OK.

- Can I ask you something? - Of course you can.

I don't suppose you know of anyone who could shift a grand piano, do you?

- A what? - A grand piano.

A grand piano? You're in luck, Miss Hanlon.

- You've just met an entrepreneur. - It's Roisin.

- This your club? - No, not yet.

We thought we'd get the cards made up first. Then see how things go.

Oh, right, OK.

- So, a piano? - Yeah.

- Out of the way. Come on. - Jesus.

All right?

How's that?

- It's just up the one floor, OK? - One floor, darling?

- Are you Irish? - Yeah.

Could you not have stuck with a tin whistle?

Right, round this bend and just haul it up these stairs, boys.

OK?

For fuck's sake, Roddie, you're putting me through the wall!

- Sorry, Danny. Fuck's sake, wee man. - OK.

I'm gonna part your stains after this, Casim.

He told us we were shifting a dresser for a pensioner.

- She's older than she looks. - Thanks very much!

Come on! Just take the fucking weight, you fat bastard!

I cannot, Danny. My arms are fucking three foot longer!

I'm turning into an octopus.

Argh! It's on my fingers, Danny!

Fucking wee man. You useless fucking bastard, Roddie.

Calm down, Danny!

All right, wee man.

Argh! ROISIN: Jesus Christ!

Jesus Christ! My piano! Fuck!

What are you doing? You stupid bastard.

Are you all right?

OK, wee man?

Flattened my balls.

Oh, for fuck's sake.

All right? You're a stupid bastard, you.

I think you're gonna need to re-tune this.

No, I meant the piano.

Wee man's just had his meat and two veg mangled with the piano.

- OK, wee man. - Give us a sec, will you?

I thought I heard a perfect high C when that hit you, wee man.

Very fucking funny.

Well, it's sounded better.

It survived. Just.

Very good.

I've really missed this.

Whose was the fancy pad where you picked it up from?

An ex.

You two fall out?

No. Just changed.

At least, I did.

He looked upset.

Did he?

- Do you want a cup of tea? - No, no, thanks.

I'd better be off. I'm helping my dad at the shop.

- OK. - See you later.

'Scuse me. Are you the lady with the grand piano?

Might be.

Don't suppose you fancy coming to a gig tonight?

I'm meeting a friend.

It'll be very low-key. Blues and swing.

I have to work tomorrow.

- What time do you start? - Nine.

You'll be back in by seven, I promise!

- Hammid. - Well done.

How are you doing, mate?

- Has he been keeping youse entertained? - To say the least.

He's been telling us about this club of yours.

We've got a new place, ten minutes away from here.

Maybe 15 minutes.

It's an old barn and we've converted it into a fuck-off nightclub.

It's unbelievable, by the way.

It's gonna be the latest and trendiest club. This man's gonna be DJ-ing, I'll be promoting.

When do we get to go?

It depends how tonight goes.

What are you doing later on?

I don't believe this. There's your sister.

Oh, for fuck's sake.

What? Your sister? Yeah, she's all right.

- What are you doing here? - Hi, Miss Hanlon. How you doing?

OK, Tahara? Girls?

- How do youse know them? - They're my pupils.

Bet you didn't have to climb out the window.

- I nearly broke my neck. - Tahara, come here.

Shit. Are you gonna go?

She's in trouble, isn't she?

If it gets back to her mum and dad, they'll kill her.

Come here.

What the fuck are you doing here?

Well, what do you think? I'm out with my mates, like you are.

- Leave. - No.

- Please. - Erm...

You're no' hanging about here, dressed like that in front of me. Leave.

- Why's Miss Hanlon here? - She was here having a drink.

- Oh, really. - Oh, really.

Listen, Tahara, I'm working here. Right? I'm working here.

I'm here with Hammid, OK?

- Yeah, whatever. - Yes, whatever. Move.

- Are you worried? - No, why should I...?

- You sure? - Not at all.

- Let me just fix that for you. - Oh! You a wee bit strangled my neck there.

- OK. - OK, thanks.

Yeah. Whoo-hoo, postman!

Are they here yet?

No. What's this one like, Rukhsana?

- I bet he's a wee plookie ferret from Bradford. - Oi.

I heard that he's over six feet tall,

he's a fair... He has a fair complexion and he's got a full head of hair.

- Eugh! - What do you mean? That sounds nice.

You make him sound like a Viking.

It's supposed to be just tea, Mum.

There's a car coming.

- Is that them? - Oh, what a car!

- That's pretty gorgeous. - Oh, wow!

- Is that them? - Oh, my God!

Where are they? Oh, there they are.

Aye, now, you two, on your best behaviour.

- Oh, he's stunning. - He's all right.

Sorry about the mess.

Auntie, I did my Bachelor of Science degree from Imperial College, London.

Auntie, it's er... going really well, you know.

- Thanks. Thank you. - I've got a great team. Highly motivated.

Erm... I foresee myself spending a long time in Manchester.

You are very lucky. You have lovely parents.

- Thank you. - Thank you, ji.

So, what do you think of Glasgow?

Excuse me, Tahara. Do you mind? You want to sit here for a minute?

You go in there. Er... just... It's all right. You come in there. That's right.

Have a seat there.

That's a good girl.

- Psychology. - Psychology. Very nice.

So, you are an accountant?

I'm doing a feasibility study.

It's just to do with import and export.

A journalist.

- Aerobics? - Yeah.

- Oh, right. Do you enjoy that? - It's OK.

It's food to do some voluntary... voluntary work in the communities.

Oh, OK.

- She is beautiful. - Thank you.

- Casim, you are a lucky young man. - Very lucky.

Is this it? CASIM: This is it.

- OK... - "Is this it?" This is it!

This is my place.

- Yeah, but I thought... - My club.

A touch of paint is what you said.

Look at the potential that's in this place.

Bars all across the side there.

Both sides.

A dance floor so big it covers the whole back.

Hundreds of bodies just dancing to the beat.

Me, up on a podium...

raised so I can see, look over everyone.

VIP rooms, different music rooms everywhere.

You with your grand piano away in a room over there.

There'll be lights flashing from everywhere.

All these angles...

Can you not see it?

That's gonna cost you millions.

- £56,000. - £56,000.

- There won't be any dress codes. - No dress codes?

Cos there's no expectation. There's never expectation.

- So transvestites... transvestites to anoraks? - Burkas to G-strings.

Where even shy girls can make the first move.

And nervous little boys won't run away.

Doesn't feel quite the same without the grand piano.

You're strong...

- You're strong, aren't you? - For a wee Irish girl, I am.

2-1 to me.

Never!

OK, truce, then? OK?

- Truce. - Yeah.

- Promise? - Swear to God.

Over my dead body, you mug!

- Now it's a truce. - OK, now it's a truce.

I forgot to say...

I like your name.

I forgot to say...

I like your hands.

Ah, Roisin, Elsie...

Can I ask whose idea it was to sing a Burns song?

It was the modern studies class.

They thought it would fit in with their third-world debt project.

I don't think a song written by a well-known drunken fornicator is really appropriate

- for the holy sacrifice of the mass. - Is that right?

Roisin... Roisin...

I've just had a telephone call from David

and he tells me that he's going to take early retirement.

So it's my intention to offer you a full-time post.

- And I won't take no for an answer. - Really?

You enjoy the mid-term break and I hope you'll come back as a permanent member of staff.

- What about an interview? - We don't need to worry about that.

We've seen your work for the past nine months and I don't want to lose you.

- Thanks a lot. That's great. - That's OK. I'll catch you later.

- I've just been made permanent. - You're kidding! Fantastic!

I can't believe it.

Girls, hurry along to your next class, OK?

To Spain?

Yeah, there was, like, a two-for-one deal going on, so I just went ahead and booked it.

- Leaving tomorrow? - That your own directory enquiries?

Come on!

Jesus Christ!

You just booked them?

It's a bit short notice, isn't it?

Casim, that mortar's going to fucking f et hard if you don't put it back on.

I don't know. Is it under there somewhere?

Where the fuck are you going?

Mum...

I've got to go to London for a few days. We may have a backer for the club.

Three days, Mum.

I'm just gonna get some stuff ready in the house.

It's freezing!

You know what the best thing is?

No, please don't! Let me go in my own time.

- This is the best thing. - No, no!

- Thank you. - Gracias.

- Algo mas? - No, nada mas, gracias.

So what about angels?

We have angels.

- Virgin birth? - Yep.

- We've even got a special chapter on Mary. - Really?

Erm...

Transubstantiation?

What's that?

It's where the priest turns the bread and wine literally into the body and blood of Jesus Christ.

- What are you laughing at? - No.

So I suppose, then, you believe that the Archangel Gabriel

in a cave, whispered the word of God word by word into Mohammed's ear.

Exactly.

There's still so much I'm proud of.

Do you know what "zakat" means?

It's when you give a percentage of your income to the poor.

My dad, still to this day, gives exactly to the penny to asylum seekers.

Aye.

Kill a man, kill all of humanity.

We can be higher than angels and lower than dogs.

Love thy neighbour as thyself.

None of us truly believe until we wish for our brothers and sisters what we wish for ourselves.

To the prophet.

To Jesus. A lesser prophet, but what the hell.

Well, at least we both believe that life is one long miserable test

and the Day Of Judgment is fast approaching. So, to paradise.

- Cheers. - Or hell's furnace.

Paradise.

To be honest with you, I think I was lonely more than anything else, you know.

It's cos I've no family. It's kind of why I got married.

You got married?

Yeah.

- How old were you? - 19.

19!

Mm. Big, white, fluffy, meringue dress and pointy shoes-the works.

Jesus...

19?

In front of all our friends and God and state and church...

I swore with all my heart that, no matter what, I would live with him for the rest of my life.

- What's he like? - Och, he's lovely.

I mean, he's a really kind man, you know?

Just more of a friend.

And what's wrong with companionship?

There's nothing wrong with it.

I just need more.

Like what?

Erm...

The match, you know?

- The real equal match. - Yeah.

And a wee twinkle in the eye.

If that's not there, I'd just... I'd rather be on my own.

That's OK, isn't it?

So do you ever get scared now?

Erm... sometimes, yeah.

Late at night, you know, if I'm in my bed or half asleep,

or just feeling a wee bit down.

But I have this little fella to keep me company.

Is that a butterfly?

- You're a khotee. - A khotee? That a compliment?

- A lovely little khotee. - Aah.

- Do you know what you are? - What?

- A durdou. - Durdou?

What's that?

- Frog. - What?

A frog?

Thanks very much!

Hello.

You're up early.

Couldn't sleep.

There's something I've got to tell you.

I'm due to marry my first cousin Jasmine... in nine weeks.

Very funny.

- Honestly. - I don't believe you.

11 words.

Couldn't get them out.

So what the fuck is this?

Is it like some last-minute fling before you settle down to married life?

- No. - No?

Then what the fuck am I? Some cheap fucking tart at a stag party?

Jesus Christ!

I don't believe this!

11 little words, was it?

Well, here's another two for you: Fuck off!

I mean, why couldn't you tell me before we got on the plane?

- I couldn't. - Why?

Why didn't you tell me last night?

I'm sorry.

You'd better not be here when I get back.

I can't stand lies, do you hear me?

I can't fucking stand them!

You really had me fooled.

I mean... I've been with some pricks in my time

and I knew it at the time and I suffered the consequences!

Well, I really trusted you!

You're right, Roisin.

I shouldn't have let this happen.

I should have foreseen the hurt.

Should, should, should-story of my fucking life.

But I didn't.

Which made me realise something.

I'm gonna go back home and cancel the wedding.

It's too much for you to understand and I don't expect you to.

It'll probably blow my family apart.

But what the fuck?

I don't want you to ever think that you were just a cheap fling.

It wasn't like that. I promise, it was never like that.

I'm gonna book an early flight.

Thank you.

I've been away for three days. My mum has left five messages.

You're lucky. I want you to meet my friends, by the way.

I was thinking of having a dinner party on Saturday.

There's Miss Hanlon. Hi, miss!

- Hi, miss! - Hi.

There's half the school.

Look who it is over there. The incredible disappearing man.

Still here?

Have you been away, big man? I never noticed. You were that useless when you were here.

Your ma's been looking for you.

She not brought your doughnuts yet?

What's that? We've not had a doughnut for a week, big man. I can feel my ribs.

Mum!

What happened?

I tried to phone you so many times but your mobile was off or something.

- Guess what. - What?

You tell him.

No, you should tell him.

- You tell him. - No, you tell him.

What is it?

We're getting married.

- Thank you. - Excellent!

Mum, you must be so happy.

Thanks. That's great.

Listen...

Listen, let's get one thing quite clear, right?

You're gonna get married, you're gonna have kids,

you're gonna do the mum and dad thing...

which is the right thing.

Shag who the fuck you want to shag.

But don't fuck up your whole family.

And her family back home.

- It's not just about shagging, Hammid. - What's it about, then?

What's it about?

There's so many birds out there

- and you've went daft over one bird. - I've no' went daft over her.

What, you're gonna screw up your whole family?

I'm just supposed to marry somebody I don't know?

Aye. Just do it. Who cares?

You've got a family to think about.

You've got your religion to think about. You've got that to think about.

How are you gonna walk into there?

I'll lose her.

Give a fuck if you lose her. Would you rather lose your family

or would you rather lose this bird?

- This bird is a nobody. - She's not a nobody.

She is a nobody compared to your family, right? Your family back home.

You've got a mosque right there. Listen...

You're being stupid if you think for one minute everyone's gonna understand.

No-one's gonna understand. As far as anyone's concerned, she's a goree.

She's a white girl. That's it.

She's no' a Muslim.

Sarah can't make it, by the way, so it's just going to be the five of us.

I'm not coming.

I'm not coming up.

What do you mean?

Why not?

Did you talk to your folks?

I tried to tell them last night.

I just couldn't think of the words.

I feel so strong when I'm around you.

But it'll break their hearts.

It'll destroy them.

What about your heart?

What about my heart?

Jasmine?

Do you love her?

You don't understand. It's... It's not about love.

It's much more than that.

So are you just gonna erm...

sit back and let your parents make all your choices for you?

Or are you gonna actually do something about it and say something to them?

I'm their only son.

I can't let them down.

I can't.

Casim...

We're good together, you know?

I mean...

it's easy.

It feels right, you know?

And I think that we can...

If we want to, we can make it work.

For how long?

I don't know, but who knows that?

Does anybody ever really know that?

You just...

You just take a chance.

I can't match you, Roisin.

I can't match you.

I've got some good news, guys.

Dad...

- Sorry. - Dad...

- What is it? - Erm...

I got some really food news today.

I've been offered an unconditional place at Edinburgh University.

Here, Dad.

There's 20 students chasing every place.

Wait a minute. What's going on here?

Why Edinburgh?

Erm... because the course I want to do... erm... is in Edinburgh.

Listen, dear, there are four or five universities in this bloody city.

What's the community gonna say?

It's a good university. It's the only course I want to do.

Your brother... Your sister went to Glasgow University.

And your brother went to university in Glasgow. Are they not food enough for you?

No, Dad, it's not that. It's just...

They say you were there for an interview.

You never asked us.

You never mentioned and got permission in the house to go for an interview.

Look, I've got an unconditional place. It's amazing for someone my age.

If you could go for an interview without getting permission,

what could you do when you're there?

Dad, one second. Tahara, couldn't you just commute or something?

What's the point, then? I might as well stay in Glasgow.

The whole part of this is so I can...

What's more important to you? Education or staying away from home?

There's unis in Glasgow as well.

- Can't you just commute, Tahara? - How can you say that? No, I can't!

It's not fair. I'm gonna miss out on a whole different life. I don't want to do that!

Why... Why did you even get married and come here and have kids?

What's the point of having kids here?

We're Western! I'm sorry, but we're not from Pakistan!

Listen, don't change the subject! You are going to study in Glasgow!

- I'm not changing the subject! - You can't go!

- It's the same bloody subject! - And don't talk to me like that! Right?

Take it away! Enough is enough!

Is this why we got you educated?

That this day had to come? You cannot go! And that's final!

I'm sorry.

It really hurts. It means so much.

Do you know how much work I've put...

Do you know how much work I've put into it?

No, Mum, please!

I've worked my arse off.

- You're just over-dramatic. - Oh, just fuck off!

Don't you ever talk to me like that again.

And you are such a hypocrite!

Casim, look at me.

Look at me. What's wrong?

You're such a fucking hypocrite!

Look at me!

I'll never forgive you for this.

- You're only upset, only. - Mum...

I can't go ahead with it.

I'll sell the car. I'll give you the money back for the extension. I can't do it.

Yeah. What, birthday parties? Are you having a fucking laugh, mate?

I don't do birthday parties. I've no' been doing birthday parties for the last ten years.

But listen, if you wanna phone back, phone me back, but I've got another call.

Listen, my other phone's ringing so do you want to call back?

I'll speak to you soon. Aye, OK, mate. Yeah, hello?

Yeah, f lam stuff. Yeah, that's us, yeah.

Aye, I can sort you out with anything you want.

Mull Of Kintyre, Abba-anything you want, I'll give you it.

Aye, I can get you a DJ no problem.

The guy you're probably lookin for, I take it, is Casim.

Er, 750 quid.

That's the fucking deposit, mate, that's the deposit.

You're actually dressed all right tonight.

- Thank you. Thank God! - Don't take him on.

My wee sweetheart.

We can't talk about girls.

He's just a lad.

Roisin...

How have you been?

Great.

I didn't want to disturb you. You looked busy.

Yeah, I'm kept busy.

I don't suppose you... fancy meeting up sometime?

No.

No, I don't really see the point.

I really miss you.

Roisin... I think about you all the time.

I have to go now.

Thank you.

Thank you.

- Hi, dear. Is that all you want? - Yes.

47p, please.

- Here you are. - Thank you.

- You'll manage or you want a bag? - That's fine, thank you.

OK, thanks very much.

Miss Hanlon.

You don't have a cat, miss, do you?

No.

- Were you here to see Casim, then? - No, Tahara, I wasn't.

That's much better. It is much better. You did it a little bit again.

Roisin... Sorry, could I have a word?

Yeah, of course. Do you want to have a practice? I'll be back in a second.

Hi.

I just noticed that your Certificate Of Approval is out of date

and we need one to finalise all the details.

If you could get one, take it to your parish priest, ask him to sign it, and that's it: Full-time post.

OK, great. Thanks.

Walk.

Walk!

Hello?

Tahara told me you called off the wedding.

And that you've moved out of home.

- Hi. - Hi.

- What was that for? - Cos you're a bastard.

And you deserve it.

- You're the bastard. - I am not.

You're a prick.

Prickette.

Dick.

Dickette.

- I really missed you. - I missed you.

Let's fuck.

Roisin, you're going to have to duck down.

- Quickly. Seriously. - Are you serious?

- Seriously. - Casim...

It's another of my cousin's takeaways.

- That's you. - That's the last time I'm doing that.

- You have to do it again. - How many cousins do you have?

- There you go, Miss Hanlon. - Oh, lovely.

Gulab jamin and ice cream.

- Gulab jamee? - No, gulab jamin and ice cream.

Thanks very much. What is it?

Gulab jamin and ice cream.

Thank you.

It's my mum.

Hello?

Mum... don't cry, Mum.

Promise, Mum. Look...

Mum, don't cry.

Mum, don't say that.

What's wrong?

She found my dad lying in my bed.

He had a nightmare.

Let me show you something.

- My dad's a twin. - Is he?

Och, look.

They're lovely.

Where were these taken?

India. Their eighth birthday.

Two months before Partition, 1947.

They were Muslims living in India.

They had to get over to Pakistan.

The Sikhs and Hindus fled the other way.

15 million people on the march.

Plus two.

They said it was like a journey from hell.

The whole fucking place exploded in hysteria.

Muslims butchered Hindus, Hindus slaughtered Muslims.

Hundreds and hundreds of thousands of people died.

Halfway through, they were caught in an ambush outside a village.

My dad's brother was kidnapped.

He was never, ever seen again.

It's marked my dad for life.

What was his name?

Casim.

I'd love to meet them.

You know, get to know them, slowly.

- Did you ever imagine being a Muslim? - No.

Under any circumstances?

No.

They can't imagine me being with someone who's not a Muslim.

I've a friend who's been living with his girlfriend for seven years.

His parents think there's a bunch of them who share a flat together.

I couldn't live a lie like that, Casim. No way.

It's easy for you.

Nothing to lose.

"Can't live a lie". It's a self-indulgence.

What are you talking about?

Do you want me to break with my family?

I mean break forever?

Could you do that with your mum?

And what do you ask of them?

They can't make the jump, Roisin.

- They can't. - So people can't change?

They're beyond that.

I mean, if they see me living here, my whole life would be destroyed with them.

So what are we going to do?

Just tell little lies for the rest of our... time together?

I almost said "lives".

- Hello, I'm here to see Father Chambers. - Are you expected?

- Yeah, I've got an appointment. - If you'd like to take a seat, please.

- Can I have your name, please? - It's Roisin Hanlon.

- Good morning, Father. - Straight through.

I haven't seen you in Mass for some time, Roisin.

I take it you've been attending another parish.

The school have offered me a permanent position.

Since I'll be moving from a temporary contract into a full-time post,

I just need my Certificate Of Approval updated, so I'd be grateful if you'd sign it for me.

And that's it, yes? Simple as that?

Thank you, Father. Goodbye, Father.

I was given this by the Archdiocese.

The appropriate section being the update of the Educate Scotland Act, 1918.

In particular, the amendments of 1989, schedule 10, paragraph 8.

"Each teacher shall be approved as to his religious belief and character"

by the representative of the Church

"in whose interest the school is being conducted."

What do you think is the rationale behind Catholic schools?

"It is a community of faith where pupils and teachers work together,

recognising that they share the same Christian values."

What do you make of that? That is the law of the land.

I wasn't aware of the details, Father.

It's even more specific than you think.

As parish priest, I have to satisfy myself that the teacher in question

"is giving public witness to the faith in their daily lives."

Now, that is quite clear, Roisin.

OK... I'm not going to beat around the bush.

Are you living with a man?

Sorry?

Are you having sex outside of marriage?

- That's none of your business. - It is my business.

You've not been listening.

I have a responsibility to the parents of those Catholic children that you teach.

I am a priest. I'm not some 9-to-5 bureaucrat who's here just to rubber-stamp things.

What are you thinking? You think you can get into bed

with any Tom, Dick or Mohammed and teach Catholic kids?

- What did you say? - You heard fine well what I said!

- Who told you that? - None of your business!

None of my business? I'm sorry, but this is my life you're talking about.

It's my... my job, my career!

And who do you think you are to speak to me like I'm your housekeeper or some altar boy?

I am your parish priest!

I'll speak to you in whatever manner I see fit! Now, sit down!

If you want to keep this job of yours, I suggest you take a seat!

Now! Sit!

Now...

Let's both take a deep breath and see if we can sort this out amicably now.

I do not doubt for a second that you are a wonderful teacher.

In fact, I've got letters from the school saying so, but I have to listen to my conscience.

In the eyes of the Catholic Church, you are still a married woman.

Now, you're a young woman. You can apply for annulment.

This boy you're living with, is he a Catholic?

Would he consider becoming a Catholic?

- We haven't spoken about it. - Well, I suggest you do.

And anyway, even if he doesn't want to become a Catholic, we're not living in the Dark Ages.

When you get an annulment, you can get a special dispensation

and then you can get married on the condition that you both vow

that you will bring up your children as Catholics.

Now, in the meantime...

you cannot live in sin

and come in here and ask me to rubber-stamp it or give you some seal of approval.

You might not like that, but that's simply the way it is.

The faith of our fathers is not for the faint-hearted. I'll give you some advice.

You go home, you kick him out and you get married.

And if you're not prepared to do that, I suggest you go and teach the Protestants.

He was rude, he was patronising...

He was horrible. The whole thing was horrible.

I mean, it's an ordinary school, supported 100% by public taxes. Our taxes at that.

What my private life has to do with anything I've no idea.

"Living in sin".

Fucking cheek of him.

What would your mum have made of all this?

Oh, God, I don't know. I mean, she would have supported me,

and she probably would have said, "I just want you to be happy, Roisin."

Then probably a day or two later, she would have said, "What about the children?"

That's what everybody's going to be thinking, isn't it?

What colour are they going to be?

Are they going to be circumcised? Which school will they go to?

What religious stamp are you going to stick to them?

They're fucking bigots, all of them. They drive me fucking insane.

If it's not the Holy Willy priest and his cronies on one side,

it's your dad and the fucking mullahs on the other and we're stuck in the middle.

Don't say that, Roisin.

- Don't call my dad a bigot. - Well, what is he, then?

- He could be a lot of things but he's not a bigot. - You said so yourself.

- You don't know him. - You said he'd look through me.

He's not a bigot. You don't know him, Roisin.

- You're too scared to introduce us. - You're white. You don't understand.

Sign it.

- Is that my resignation? - Your contract.

- I haven't got the Certificate Of Approval. - I don't care.

- This is your head on the line, Michael. - I said...

sign it.

You do know I'm still living with him...?

That's none of my business, Roisin, and, as far as I'm concerned,

it's none of that old fanatic's business either. You've done a first-class job here.

Look, do I have to forge that signature for you?

No.

Excuse me.

- Are you Miss... Hanlon? - Yeah.

My name's Rukhsana Khan. I'm Casim's older sister.

Hi.

Erm... is it possible to have... have a chat with you?

Yeah, sure. Do you want to come up?

Could we go elsewhere?

- Tea? - Thanks.

Thanks.

That's great. Thanks.

Roisin, you must be wondering why I've asked to...

Well, I've come to see you, I suppose.

You must think this is very odd, but...

basically, I feel that I had to talk to you because of what's going on just now with my family.

Erm...

Casim's left home and he's living with you.

And erm... as far as my family's concerned and my community's concerned,

it's brought a great deal of shame on all of us.

You see, we have this concept called "izzat"...

which I guess is family honour,

and that's really, really important to people.

And my parents, all their life, have worked very, very hard to maintain that, to keep that.

And they've built up respect and trust in the community.

And what Casim has done has basically taken that away.

And not only that...

I don't know if Casim told you, but...

I met Amar through my family...

and we got on really well, our families got on really well.

We were very fond of each other.

In the short time that we've known each other, we feel very strongly.

And we both want to get married.

But because of what Casim's done...

his mother phoned up and cancelled the wedding.

I love your brother.

Why can't you accept that?

For how long?

I... I don't know.

When will you know?

When everybody's lives are fucked up?

Can't you understand what's going on?

Can't you understand that, because of your... love,

that so many people's lives are being destroyed?

You clearly don't understand, do you?

Roisin, I'm just going to ask you straight.

Will you leave my brother?

Please will you leave my brother?

No.

Roisin, can I have a word with you?

I need to have a quick word with you. Come over here.

Away from the classroom.

Roisin... I am so sorry.

I have just had a call from the Director Of Education and I'm afraid you're out,

and I'm in a bit of trouble.

They're going to move you on to a non-denominational school on Monday,

so I'm afraid this is your last day.

This is ridiculous.

I-I agree.

So I start in another school on Monday.

Yes, I'm afraid so.

What about the students? Can I not work till the end of the term?

I know. I know, and I regret that bitterly, but I'm afraid...

all you can do is go back in there and say that you're having to leave.

And this'll be the last day.

It's shocking, I know.

And they will be as disappointed as I am.

- Hello? - Casim, move your fucking arse!

Get down the stairs, right?

- Or we're gonna fuck up this whole deal. - OK.

- Give me a minute. I'm coming. - How many minutes? An hour?

- Give me a minute. - You wee dick! Move it!

I need to go. We're meeting those backers from London.

- Can you postpone? - We're picking them up at the airport just now.

Why don't you give him the plans? He can go on his own.

He needs me to come along with him.

Well... I kind of need you here, Casim. I lost my job today.

I'll be back in a couple of hours. It won't take long.

If it's not Hammid, it's the priest.

- If it's not the priest, it's your bloody sister. - My sister's OK.

She's OK? She asked me to leave you.

Roisin, I need to go. It's important to me.

And this is important to me.

I've tried to understand your sister, Casim, I really have.

I've tried to understand your whole family, in fact.

If your dad's so great, I don't see why he can't start treating me like a human being.

- If you'd been in his shoes you wouldn't judge... - Here we go again.

"Here we go again? Here we go again?"

Have you ever had a dog set on you, Roisin?

Have a group of kids chasing after you, making monkey noises? I don't think so.

You have any idea how many times he had to keep his mouth shut?

The humiliation, the insults he's been through? No, none whatsoever.

Have you ever been spat on, in fact?

Just ask Rukhsana what it feels like to have a grog run down her face.

- OK, so there's racist bastards out there. - I saw my father stabbed.

He nearly bled to death in my arms.

So excuse fucking me.

Fucking coming, mate! Wait!

That's not fair, Casim.

It's not my fault.

And it's not my family's fault if they're treated like Paki foreigners,

not quite up to the mark.

I need to go, Roisin.

- It's really important I meet them. - Stay.

- I'll be back as soon as I can. - Casim, I'm asking you to stay, please.

- It's our backers from London. - Yeah, I know that, but I'm a...

If they like us, it's our big chance.

Maybe your sister's right. Maybe we shouldn't be with each other.

- Maybe we shouldn't. - Fuck you, then.

- Fuck off, then. - Whatever.

Dick.

Roisin?

Roisin, can you take the chain off, please?

Is everything OK?

- She's not answering her mobile. It's off. - Still not got hold of her?

Here, babes. Don't worry. Maybe she's gone out or something.

OK? Don't worry.

Hi, Roisin. If you're in, please pick up the phone at least.

I can't call you on your mobile cos it's off. I'm so sorry.

I feel like shit. I promise I'll make it up to you.

If you're making me squirm, it's working. I deserve it.

I've got some good news. They're putting up the money for the club.

We're going out to celebrate. I can't do that without you.

I'll have no-one to spin on the dance floor.

Please phone me when you get back in, but if you're in, please pick up for me.

See you soon, my durdou.

- Casim... - What?

- That was your mum on the phone. - What did she say?

That you're always engaged. She's trying to get hold of you. Phone her back.

- Anything else? - Well, she's not going to tell me.

Give her a wee phone.

Hello, Tahara?

Wh...

Tahara, are you still there?

What was that?

She got cut off.

Might have been bad reception. Don't worry about it.

No, I was calling the house phone.

I think it might have something to do with your mum, no?

Hi, Miss Hanlon, this is Rukhsana Khan, Casim's sister.

I was hoping that I could, erm, meet up with you.

Hello?

Hi.

It's Rukhsana here. Can I ask you a favour?

What is it?

I need to show you something.

Show me what?

Well, it's difficult to explain over the phone. Could I pick you up?

How nice to see you, Casim.

- Is everything all right? - Oh, fine. Everything is fine. But we miss you.

Gosh, how nice to see you.

Ah, leave it... Leave it.

What do you think of it?

- Is Tahara OK? - Tahara, she's in her room studying.

Come on. She's fine.

And... What do you think of it? We got it finished.

- All done? - Oh, aye. Come on, I'll show you inside of it.

There you are. All finito.

This is your fitted kitchen.

See?

Real McKay stuff.

And Casim, see that? Real pine wood.

And your sister Rukhsana thought you would need the internet stuff.

- What do you call it? - Laptop.

Aye. There you are. It's all yours.

- Why are we stopped here? - Erm... this is our house.

Erm...

What am I doing here, Rukhsana?

Just... Just wait and see.

That's Amar there.

That's the extension my father's been working on.

He was completely obsessed with it.

Well, are we going to go in or just...

Just... Just... That's my mum.

- She's missed Casim so much. - Is that Casim?

Are we gonna go and meet them?

Just wait one second.

Who are they?

That's erm... Jasmine. Casim's fiancée.

Och, for fuck's sake, Rukhsana! What the fuck am I doing here?

What are you trying to do? Just rub it in my face, is it?

- I didn't meant to upset you. - Oh, did you not?

What do you think you're trying to do to me?

My intention's not to upset you.

I just want you to see what's going on, how we live, what our family's like.

Can't you see that this'll all be destroyed if...

I was told that the wedding is off.

- Is the wedding off? - No.

You'll see. Casim will go ahead with the marriage.

His family's very important to him.

So what is this? Are you just gonna leave me here

like a fucking eejit and rub it in my face?

My intention is to show you what's going on here and show you that that's my family.

I care about them, OK?

I am not prepared to give all that up plus Amar up

for someone who doesn't even know they're going to love my brother next week.

You're fucked, Rukhsana. You and your whole fucking family is fucked!

What did I say before I left?

Casim, I've tried to tell you but they've got my mobile.

- They've got Roisin outside. - What?

- They've got Roisin outside in the car! - Casim! Stand still!

Hey! Come back here!

What the fuck's going on?

- You come back here! - I don't know. She's gone.

I can't fucking believe this. What's going on?

- Come here! - She's gone.

Where is she?

- No, I'm not coming back anywhere. - Forget her!

- Rukhsana, take your mum inside. - Is this some sort of fucking joke?

I may not be as clever and educated like you are, but I'm your father.

Please try to understand. Right? Listen.

See, you could be with them 100 years.

They'll still call you "black bastard". Right? You're still the same to them.

Think of 25 years down the road.

What happens when you don't have your health, your money, your resources, your business?

- What happens? She'll kick you out. - You don't know that, Dad.

Listen, don't let a cheap goree come between us.

They throw you out in the street. She'll find another man.

What about values? Right?

What about your culture? Your religion? Right?

Listen to your mum.

We're your parents. We'll die for you.

We'll do anything for you. You're our only son. You're our future.

Respect my choice, then, Dad!

That's all I ask of you. Respect my fucking choice!

We do! You don't understand that. Right?

Meet her. Her name's Roisin. Meet her, talk to her, get to know her. Can you do that?

- Listen, I'll ask you one more time. - You're not asking me, you're telling me.

You've done that your whole life. Your whole fucking life you've told me.

- Don't swear like that to me. - Just give her a chance. Give her a chance!

Casim!

Come back!

Oh, God!

Hey, you bastard, you!

Hey! You do that for them!

Bastard! Bastard!

Bastard! Bastards!

Stop it!

Bastards! Come on! Fucking do that, eh?

Roisin?

Roisin?

- How's your hand? - It's better. It's better.

Dad...

I know how you feel about... me wanting to be a journalist.

And about Edinburgh University.

I just want you to know that... I really want to go.

And I'm going to go.

And I'm gonna keep speaking to Casim.

I can't not speak to him. He's my brother.

Thanks, Mum.

I've been looking for you everywhere, Roisin.

I went to a bar.

Several, actually.

Nearly fucked a complete stranger. Can you believe that?

I felt a tad lonely, to be honest.

Have you come to pick up your stuff?

That depends.

What on?

Whether you'll grow tired of me.

Absolutely.

Will you throw me out if I get sick?

Definitely.

Watch too much telly?

Most certainly.

Become bankrupt and penniless?

Without a doubt.

If I get depressed and lose my mind?

I'll send you a card.

- Better pick up my stuff, then. - Yeah, you'd better.

And what about...

when I get very, very, very old, Miss Hanlon?

I'll let you know.

Crazy durdou.

Smelly goree.