Original subtitles

It's not right for you to divorce me and stay married to my family.

My daughter, she was born sleeping.

How would you describe your marriage?

Rachel, I know you're still married.

You know, sometimes I wish you'd just hit me instead.

Well, if you want someone to behave like a dick in public.

Anxiolytic. It's a total disinhibitor.

It's not like you're doing it for her.

-Why am I doing it? -I'll let you down.

You haven't crossed my mind.

How are you going to stop me from inside, eh?

-I'm going to kill him. -There's a queue.

Yes.

He's dead.

-What? -Jack's dead.

-Uh... -And we killed him.

-Well, you did. -Hey, wait a minute.

Because you said it was something...

Anxiolytic. It was anxiolytic.

We gave it to Emily, remember?

And she was fine. In, like, five minutes.

And it leaves no trace.

Yeah, well, whatever it was,

I've just pulled him out of the pool face first.

-But he's still dead. -Yes, Tej!

Oh.

Look, I've got to call the police before the kids get home.

All right, yeah.

Oh, wait, wait, no, no, no. You can't.

-What? -Because you called me.

If the police are in any way suspicious,

the first thing they're going to do is check your phone record...

-No, no, no, no, no. -...which will link you to me,

to everyone, the whole revenge club.

-What you do that for? -Because you just said that.

No fucking point now. Listen to me.

My phone uses an SS7 exploit,

meaning I can call without leaving a trace.

But if I can get a hold of yours, I can do something similar.

I can do a patch job, scramble the records,

make it look like you called your bank.

-Yeah, okay. -I'm coming over.

Do not call. I repeat, do not call.

Tej, my kids are with their gran.

If they come home and I haven't reported this...

-I'll be there. -Tej, don't let anyone see you.

No one's gonna see me.

Mom and dad are asleep and the restaurant's...

I know.

I know, Nani, I know, okay?

I'm really, really sorry, okay?

I'll call you next week, but I really do have to...

I have to go.

Hey, hey, hey, don't think you're going anywhere

without saying hello to your brother, come on.

No one even told me he was coming.

Nonsense, it was all over the family WhatsApp group.

What family WhatsApp group?

Ro-Ro.

Beige!

Come here.

Oh, mate, I'm so sorry I missed the wedding.

Turns out it's for the best, though, eh?

You had a good few years? Get up to anything fun?

Ah, you know, this and that.

He's being modest. He went to India.

Rohan's been studying at the Chinmaya Mission

under Swami Vishwananda himself.

Yes, studying/sent under duress

to get his anger issues under control.

Best thing that ever happened to me, man.

You know, I'm happier, I'm calmer and even better,

I get to take what I've learned and pass it on.

So many people want to hear him lead puja.

They've had to ticket it.

2,000 of his TikTok followers went into the ballot.

Well, I am handing out free Krispy Kremes.

Ah.

Speaking of delicious and a tiny bit naughty,

try.

-Oh. -But be warned.

Anyone's ever tasted my Handvo pancakes

has fallen for me hard.

Um, no, one Jogia boy's quite enough, thank you.

Oh, come on.

Mm.

Yeah?

What'd I tell you? What'd I tell you?

Hey, let me... I have to go.

Who died?

Hello?

You're never going to believe this.

-Tej? -Jack only went and died.

-What? -What happened?

-Is someone there? -Jack's dead.

-What? -Is it Steve?

No, it's not Steve. It's Calum.

What happened?

I don't know, but it's got nothing to do with us.

Rachel found him face down in the pool this morning.

Jesus. Drowned in the pool.

Jesus Christ.

-I need to ring Rachel. -No, do not... do not do that.

Fuck's wrong with you people?

Just sit tight, do nothing, act normal, okay?

-Fuck. -I know.

You okay?

Yeah, why wouldn't I be okay?

Because...

-I mean, we did just... -No, we didn't.

Don't go there.

He was fine when we left him.

Fuck.

Sorry. Wrong house.

What sort of psycho orders Indian takeaway at 10:00 a.m.?

Rachel, I can see you're in shock.

And we want nothing more

than to give you the space to take it in.

But to do that, we have to ask you some questions.

Is that okay?

I'm sorry, I... I can't do this.

I can't do this.

Listen. If you do want to talk about what happened...

Let's just keep this simple, yeah?

Okay, now, fuck off.

What do you want, Charlotte?

-Can I come in? -No.

Oh, okay. Um...

Well, what do you want?

It wasn't supposed to be like this.

Oh, you don't fucking say.

Look, the wedding is a fresh start.

For the three of us.

No matter what you might think.

I want that for you, too.

-Oh. -I...

I want you to let us go.

-You want me to forgive you? -No.

I'm not asking that.

A new roof doesn't change the weather.

But it can keep out the rain a bit.

So can you?

Can you let us go?

Okay, um...

bye then.

But you're not going to let go.

Not really, not completely.

Because it'll always be there, that thought gnawing away

at the back of your skull.

What if he does it again?

What he said to you, he said to me, he could say to someone else.

And when that fresh start goes stale, Charlotte, which it will,

that thought is going to fucking scream.

He never loved you.

Pathologist report.

Quite a cocktail in his stomach.

Cocaine. Also found under his nails.

So, he was obviously chopping out the lines.

Ketamine, consistent with traces

found inside baggies left around the house.

Vodka, champagne and tequila.

All washed down with chlorinated water.

Drowned then.

Look, the amount of ketamine in his system,

I'm surprised he was able to fall in, never mind get out.

Only other marks on the body

with contusions on his hand, consistent with a punch.

Traces of blood on the wedding ring, not his.

Which no doubt we won't have a match for.

Well...

Who?

I think there's more to this.

His DNA has now been found

at the scene of two suspicious deaths.

Well, that's certainly struck a nerve.

Gut?

I can believe Jackson punched him.

He's a very punchable guy.

But a killer?

I mean, if there even is one, Rosa.

Time will tell.

Hiya.

Oh, Rita. Hello.

You're a bit early.

-Oh, cuppa? I'm having. -Yes, please, thanks.

Um, milk, no sugar.

Milk, no sugar.

We, uh, the group, we go out for drinks after.

It's really nice, actually.

We've, uh... we've... we've actually become friends, the six of us.

That's wonderful to hear.

Well, always room for a seventh.

Well, I am always happy to spend time with friends.

Friends.

Ah, Steven.

I heard about your dad.

How is he?

Not good.

It's been a challenging week.

For some more than others.

My trusty jasper is to hand,

should anyone need to ground themselves.

Ah, bollocks.

Because grief is something all of you will know.

The death of a relationship

is no less painful than the death of a person.

It is, though, a complicated grief.

Perhaps something there resonates with you.

If so, the conch is yours.

-Steven? -No.

-Anyone else? -My dad loved my mum.

You could measure it out in cups of tea.

Because he'd always make her a fresh brew

if she asked for it.

Thing is, she never drank it.

Used to drive him mad.

Used to have to sit there, watch it go cold, on the side.

And then she had the nerve to ask him for another one.

He'd always make her a fresh cup.

And then he'd have to sit there and watch that go cold.

And then, she had a heart attack.

Oh.

I mean, she was all right.

For a while.

But she...

And he still kept making them, the silly sod.

And he'd wait for it to go cold,

and then he'd go and he'd make her another one because she...

Because she couldn't ask for it.

Now, don't get me wrong, Sue's brilliant. I love Sue, but...

I've been spending a lot of time with my dad in the last week and...

can't help thinking...

I don't think Sue...

would keep making me cups of tea.

Crusts.

Bloody hell. Um, crusts.

Yeah, Jim refused to eat them, point blank.

Middle-aged man, breakfast of a child.

So, I used to cut them off for him because...

it's what you do.

-Yeah. -RITA: You do the little things.

Sometimes I think about setting the restaurant on fire.

-Oh, fucking hell! -No, I wouldn't.

All my stuff's upstairs.

But then Mira wouldn't be there.

She'd have to go.

And then, she'd be out of my life forever.

You know, my feelings aren't complicated. I just...

I just want her to hurt.

The way I do.

But she doesn't.

How do you know she doesn't?

Wait, am I the arsehole?

It's been a week and I still think it's him.

And then, when it isn't, I...

Sorry, I can't help it.

I've been practicing in front of the mirror, but I just...

Does it make me a bad person?

No, of course not.

He was still a person though, wasn't he?

Still had hopes and dreams and things that he wanted to do.

Still could have changed.

Anyway, fuck him, who's next?

You can't be serious.

After everything that's happened?

Should we even still be meeting like this?

Well, diverging from normal behaviors

could arguably look even more suspicious.

But we don't have to just talk about revenge, do we?

That is not all we are.

Well...

-Whose go would it be? -Mine or Steve's.

Uh, hello, excuse me?

Well, you don't want to do it.

I didn't say that. A man died.

The police interviewed Calum.

Who's next for interrogation?

Rita, we left the party.

Whatever happened today has got nothing to do

with any of us, right, Rachel?

Well, the police think it's misadventure, so.

So, it's just an accident?

Oh, yeah, but there's a few other details

that the police don't know, aren't there?

All right.

What if we do something nice?

What are you talking about?

Well, Mira, I want her gone, yeah,

but I've kind of gone off the whole revenge thing now,

so instead, why don't we just come together

to give her something she actually wants?

-Which is? -Easy.

To study under Raja Patel.

What's a Raja Patel?

He's like the Gordon Ramsey of Gujarat.

I mean, she's cooked for him before. She even blew him away.

He offered an apprenticeship on the spot,

but she turned it down.

-Why? -Imposter syndrome.

If she wrote to him, I know he'd give her another chance.

Then she'd be out of my life for good.

But she's never been able to pluck up the courage.

Well, then good job she's got her own PR exec

to do it for her.

That's right.

Got you something.

Well, that's incredibly morbid.

Nah, it's a collector's item.

Or it would have been.

To Mr. Smoothie,

and a case closed with zero overtime.

Maybe there was a killer after all.

Don't give me that look. I invented that look.

And I'm as suspicious as they come, Rosa,

but sometimes it is just Occam's razor.

You don't know Occam's razor.

What I know is that you do this job for long enough,

you rack up so many losses you forget what a win looks like.

Look, he had the coke to come up,

the ket to bring him down,

lost his foot and fell in, couldn't get out.

It happens.

Oh, I'm not so sure.

He had enough ketamine in him to bring down a rhino.

Something's not sitting right.

That'll be the Broska.

Right. If you need some actual drinks,

can we please go to the pub?

Fine.

Cheers everyone. Ciao. Salud.

Celebrating?

Well, Mira certainly is.

She's been given a huge opportunity.

-Oh, yeah? -Tell him, Mira.

I'm going to be equity partner at Rara.

You fucking what?

Well, there was a chance we were going to lose her.

We could hardly have that, could we?

So there was something else, then?

I got another offer from Raja Patel,

and I can't quite believe I turned it down again,

but, you know, working at a restaurant

is about making it feel like home, and...

-I found mine. -Mine.

My home.

Fuck's sake.

Wait, Tej!

Tej!

Come here.

Come here.

Look, mate.

I'm not blind.

Okay?

I can see that Mira being here is causing you some...

Some pain, innit?

Yeah.

So, what we need

is to figure out how to get her away.

-Yeah. -Yeah?

No, yeah, yeah, yeah, that... that's good.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So, I'm going to ask her out.

-What? -Mm-hmm.

-No! No, no, no! -Shh! Listen.

Because if I'm taking her out on dates

and doing all that, she's going to be spending less time

-around here, isn't she? -No, but you can't...

Or do you want her around here forever?

Well, obviously not.

Because I could do fun dates in the restaurant,

but that'd just keep her around here more, wouldn't it?

-Right. -Right.

So dates in the restaurant, or dates out the restaurant?

Dates out the restaurant.

Good idea!

I'd look hell a cheap otherwise.

Oh, and, you know, to tell you the truth,

I'm actually just a little bit relieved,

because we kind of made out last week.

What?

But that was kind of like, you know, part of the plan, innit?

You know, I just got a head start.

Yeah.

Nice one, Beige.

Good talk.

You know, just once, I'd love it

if one of our plans went off without a hitch.

♪ Whack for my daddy, oh

♪ There's whiskey in the jar

No, I've only just killed that earworm.

Our whole Irish road trip, Dan had it on a fucking loop.

Tej?

There's something you should know.

You never disconnected the cameras.

Show me.

♪ Told me that she loved me and that she'd never leave me ♪

♪ But the devil take that woman, for they never can be easy ♪

♪ Dum a ding, dum a doo, dum a da ♪

♪ Whack for my daddy, oh

♪ Whack for my daddy, oh

♪ There's whiskey in the jar

Oh, we don't need to watch this.

What are you doing? I want to see it.

How can I not think about it? I'll never be her.

Emily's not, you know, uh...

Don't bullshit me. I have eyes.

Here we go.

-Em, maybe you should... -Shh.

Dan.

-Emily is beautiful. -Ugh.

Fine, yes, but it has made her ugly.

You know those girls at school that are so hot

they never develop a personality?

Emily is so much worse than that

because she did develop a personality,

but a fucking awful one.

She's vain, and vapid,

and arrogant, and narcissistic.

When I married Emily,

I didn't know what love was.

Em.

Shut it down, Tej.

He's just saying it because he has to say it

because she's a pitiful, insecure wreck of a human.

-I know. -He loved me.

I loved him.

Of course you did.

Voice of an angel.

He was my first.

Love?

Well, fuck that for a laugh.

Firsts are never good.

Trust me on that.

Lasts, on the other hand.

-Sorry about the, um... -All good.

You'd make an excellent bouncer, by the way.

You're fucking wasted in PR.

See, when Bex and me started dating...

Oh, can we not do exes? Or dating?

We're not dating.

You're either in or you're out.

And no, you can't do an in-or-out joke.

But it's right there on the table.

Leave it on the table.

I'm in.

And I'm out.

Come on.

Mom!

Oh, I forgot.

-She's out. -That's fine. Um...

I just...

popped by to see how you all were.

But something was nagging at me,

but I think it was just that I hadn't done a welfare check yet.

How are you?

Hey, look at them.

They're fab.

Thanks, I don't usually do nails, but Mom said I could.

I was going to do waves...

...but Joanne at school's got blue celestial finish...

His nails. His nails, Leon.

Why did they find coke under them but no ketamine?

Unless somebody spiked him.

I think someone murdered Jack Jackson.

You're not still watching it, are you?

From one prick to another.

Come to Rara Restaurant this Sunday

and we will feed more than just your stomach.

Join me, Baba Om, for a guided meditation

and walk your path to Shanti.

It's going to be Om-believable.

Apparently he's an influencer now.

Fucking despicable human being.

You know, he's always had everything he wants in life.

And it has never been enough.

And now he wants Mira. If he gets her, well, then...

Then they're both going to be in my life forever.

Look, I know he's not an ex. I know we have rules, but...

-We make the rules. -Yeah, let's take down Rohan.

-Hang on. -Yeah, I'm in.

-Yeah, let's do it. -No, no, no.

Well, don't I get a say in this? I thought this was a democracy.

It is. We all just voted against you.

Yeah, but what if something goes wrong again?

-Right, Rach, tell them. -Sorry, what were you saying?

-Wait, is this about Jim? -No, it's not about Jim.

It's just that you're all acting like nothing has changed,

but everything has.

Why can't any of you see that?

I'm not getting arrested just to get back at Jim.

Oh, fuck me, you're all mad.

All of you are completely mad.

Hm. I'm out.

And nobody try and stop me.

Right, tell us about Rohan.

Okay, community golden boy, but he never used to be.

Once upon a time, he was just this spotty kid with anger issues.

And then he found religion. And TikTok.

And a skincare routine.

He sort of just put them all together.

Anyway, now he's this teen idol guru thing.

He calls himself Baba Om and preaches of Raja Yoga

as his path to inner peace

and his path to fame and fortune.

It's all a lie.

He's a total screaming hypocrite.

I geolocated his phone when he said he was in India, and he wasn't.

He was in Ibiza.

He hasn't changed. No matter what he says.

That angry kid's still in there.

If there's one thing that will turn my Lula and Joshy

off an influencer, it's lack of authenticity.

So, what you need to do is you need to find

that angry kid inside of him and show it to the world.

No, I don't need to show it to the world.

Just Mira.

What about both?

Oi, Rambo. Safety glasses.

Didn't you used to run into gunfire?

Oh, yeah, wee beauty.

You pull the pin.

You wait two seconds

and you'll get enough white smoke to announce a pope.

I'm pretty sure throwing military-class smoke grenades

into a family restaurant is several sorts of illegal.

Which is why I'm going to jerryrig a fuse

and encase it in an air freshener.

Plausible deniability.

All you have to do is plug it in.

Can I hold her?

All right.

-But be careful. -Fuck's sake, I'm not seven.

Yeah.

I love you too.

Everything okay?

Silly question, really.

Yeah, that's the Jewish mom for you.

Can't stop checking in.

Or making lasagne.

That was her letting me know dinner's on the table.

-But you're... -In a depressed ex-soldier's caravan

formulating a plan to take down a Hindu guru's TikTok empire.

Yeah, life. Comes at you fast.

I... I can't look 'em in the eye.

The kids...

No, they idolize Jack.

And I can't tell them the truth.

I can't live the lie.

I just wish it wasn't an accident.

-No, I... -I get it, Rach.

I didn't mean that. It's not what I meant. I just...

I mean, I just wish someone had been there.

Then they could have told me.

Was he angry? Was he scared?

Unrepentant? Remorseful?

I think he was probably just drunk, Rach.

Yeah, probably.

You should go.

Just be at home.

We can handle this one.

Calum, you fucking twat!

I barely touched it.

One fucking rule! One!

Oh, I mean...

-What did I tell you? -I know, I know.

Hey, guys, how you doing? Good to see you.

Hi.

Hey, buddy. Guys, how are we doing?

Not bad. That's awesome.

Ready?

What are you doing?

Just checking if the air freshener's working.

Breath is the gateway to the soul, right?

That is right, brother.

I didn't realize you followed me.

Well, on TikTok anyway.

I know about Ibiza.

How on earth did you find out about my holiday?

You know, Swami Vishwananda himself said the Es Vedra sunset

was the first moment he truly understood kala.

He recommended it.

Wait.

Tej, did you...

Did you think I was out there clubbing?

Oh, I can see you're carrying a lot of resentment for me, eh?

But that's okay. That's okay.

I've got an eight-step program for that.

You know, Mira's actually on it.

It's part of her, you know, healing journey.

From you.

Oh, speaking of Mira, quick question.

Does she spit or swallow?

When she's cooking?

You know I hate a messy kitchen.

Brothers and sisters,

family and friends.

Now, we live in a loud world.

A world of flashing screens, endless notifications,

a thousand distractions pulling us in a thousand directions.

Is it any wonder that we lose ourselves in the noise?

It's almost time.

Is it any wonder when faced...

Oh, I think we might have a problem.

Oh, fuck, fuck!

How does she even know the plan?

Oh, it's me, she asked.

I thought she was making conversation.

But the ancient sages, they taught that the path

to peace is not about escaping the world.

No. But engaging with it, fully.

Now, let's all take a moment to breathe into our peace.

After everything, I thought better of you than to drop us all in it.

Emily, I wasn't. I... I wouldn't. You're my friends.

I... I was just going to say that someone

was going to spoil the event.

That was it.

I just don't want anyone else to get hurt.

For the last time, Rita, Jack...

I don't care about Jack. I care about you.

I mean, look at us.

Rachel has got no closure.

Calum is at war with Bex. Dan is still inside your head.

Are any of us actually any happier?

Can't we just talk?

If Jim and I had talked, we wouldn't be in this mess.

Okay.

Okay?

Go on then. Talk to Rohan.

And after, when you're done,

when Mira and Rohan are official, and Tej, our friend,

is more miserable than ever, then you talk to him.

So then...

just take a breath.

Let us do our thing.

And after, we'll call you and go to the pub,

six of us, your friends, and we'll talk, okay?

-Okay. -Okay.

Emily.

Be careful.

Everything all right?

Emily?

Yeah. Yeah, fine.

Om.

That's the signal.

Om.

Everyone, everyone, everyone stay calm. Stay calm. Stay calm.

It... it's Photoshop.

Those are... It's deepfakes.

That... that's not me.

This is you. This is all...

He's always been jealous of me.

I'm telling you, just fucking look at him.

Now he's been acting suspicious all day.

All day. He even knew about Ibiza.

No. No, no, no, no, no.

No, I mean, I was in Ibiza, but I wasn't...

You know, I wasn't...

Fuck off, Nani!

-Ooh. -Oh, my God.

We got him.

I still can't believe that you found a photograph

of him shirtless at a beach party on horseback.

Where there's a will...

I still can't believe nothing went wrong.

Only because Emily talked Rita off a ledge.

Where is she, anyway?

Oh, fuck.

Well, she's hearted it, so I think we've...

Your mom said you'd been doing these meetings.

That's good.

The course convener said I'd find you here.

That you'd made friends.

That's good, too.

It's like there's this...

well, and it's bottomless,

nothing fills it, ever.

Not people, or food, or love.

Never love. Love just makes it deeper.

On some days, every now and then,

when the kitchen was buzzing...

And your mom was yelling,

the tables were rammed, the plates were spilling over,

on days like that, it just about touched the sides.

But that came at a cost.

I came to say I'm leaving.

I'm taking up Raja Patel's apprenticeship.

My cab's outside.

I know it was you who emailed him.

You're the only person I told.

I just have one question.

How did you know he'd still want me?

Because your food tastes like home.

Our daughter? I would've called her Amaya.

Amaya.

Goodbye, Amaya.

You know, Dan was wrong about one thing.

He said I built myself up based on how I look.

I didn't.

I built myself up based on how he made me feel.

It was my platform and now it's gone.

I feel like there's this...

void beneath me and I...

I don't know what to do.

Just float.

Float?

Look, I'm just a roofer.

But Dan's an idiot.

You're kind, you're loyal...

and you're exciting.

Float.

Float.

You know, maybe instead of coming over later, later, you could...

maybe come over early later?

Like, for dinner?

I've got a meeting with the lawyer about Bella in a bit.

It's just crossing the Is and dotting the Ts.

Come over straight after.

It's Dan.

-Hello? -What the fuck, Emily?

Charlotte has been grumpy for weeks and I thought

it was just wedding nerves, but it turns out it's you.

It's fucking you. What did you say to her?

I... I don't even want to know.

It'll be poison. You drip poison, Emily.

You can't help it. It's just who you are.

It's why everyone leaves you.

Just say the word.

What do you mean I've got to let them go?

I mean, Mr. Bird, there's actually nothing

you can do to stop Bex moving Bella to Spain.

I thought all this was just a formality.

I thought this was just about ticking boxes.

Something has come to light.

It seems Mrs. Bird has been made aware

of your recent involvement in a police investigation.

Involvement? How did they...

I'm not even a suspect.

It doesn't matter. It creates an impression.

It's suggestive of a person who's not...

Ah, fuck off, Barry!

I'll have one, if you're making.

It's made.

All right.

Well, I've told my dad.

-That's how you know it's real. -Mm-hmm.

I don't know how much he took in, but I've told him.

Why?

Why what?

Why wouldn't he have taken it in?

Because he's fading, Sue.

Anyway...

Oh, that sounds awful, Steven.

Let's, um...

Let's push pause on this, shall we?

I think sometimes it takes a shock

to make you realize what's important.

How about I make you that nice cup of tea, then?

Maybe we can talk.

-Oh. -No.

It's all right.

I'm a shit brother.

But we both know they were deepfakes, Tej.

You know how I'm so sure?

Because I genuinely never set foot in a club

the entire time I was in Ibiza.

And you can lie to everyone else.

I deserve it.

But you can't lie to me.

Does it feel good, what you did, Tej?

Does it make you happy?

Yeah.

You sure you're okay?

Aye, just sometimes I get these headaches.

I'll be fine by morning.

We could do breakfast, then.

-Still have dessert. -You're on.

Dan doesn't know what he's missing.

-Night, Poppins. -Bye.

Hey.

I just wanted to say good luck.

I just wanted to wish you good luck.

Good luck.

Good luck.

♪ As I was a goin' over the Cork and Kerry mountains ♪

♪ I met with Captain Farrell and his money he was counting ♪

♪ I first produced my pistol and then produced my rapier ♪

♪ And said stand and deliver

♪ Or the devil, he may take ya ♪

♪ And it's a ring dum-a do dum-a da ♪

♪ Whack for my daddy-o, whack for my daddy-o ♪

♪ There's whiskey in the jar

♪ I took all of his money and it was a pretty penny ♪

♪ I put it in my pocket and I give it all to Jenny ♪

♪ She told me that she loved me ♪

♪ And that she'd never leave me ♪

♪ But the devil take that woman 'cause they never can be easy ♪

♪ And it's a ring dum-a do dum-a da ♪

♪ Whack for my daddy-o, whack for my daddy-o ♪

♪ There's whiskey in the jar