Original subtitles

(light, uplifting orchestra music)

- Miss Georgina.

- Oh Rose.

-[Rose] Good morning Miss Georgina.

- Oh I'm so sleepy.

-[Rose] Your bath's ready.

- Oh, it was a wonderful ball.

- Their majesties, the king and queen,

accompanied by the members of the royal family

entered the ballroom at ten o'clock

when dancing commenced immediately.

The king wore the uniform of the colonel in chief

of the Scots Guard.

- Dah!

- Oh give over Edward.

The queen wore a gown of gray and silver brocade

with a corsage of silver embroidery and a crown of diamonds

with the Lesser Stars of Africa.

The coeur en or, with diamond bows

arranged as a stomacher.

- Oh quite a sparkling eh bon pain?

- What are you doing with them good glasses?

- Haven't you heard?

Mister Lyons, our purveyor of fish and poultry

is honoring our humble servants all for lunch.

- Oh and what's so special about him?

- Shh, Mister Lyons has got a soul,

and his heart's in the right place

and his muscles are as hard as iron--

- Edward!

- And take care not to tread on his heels

cause they're jellied and what's more,

there's a certain lady, not a thousand miles from here,

he'd like to catch in his net.

- Edward, when I went round at shop last week

he pinched me bottom.

- Not you Ruby, why would Mister Lyons

want to throw himself away on you?

Missus Bridges, he fancies her.

- Fancies Missus Bridges?

-[Edward] Yeah.

- Oh, go on.

- Ruby!

Have you done the breakfast washing up yet?

- Yes Missus Bridges.

- Oh well get on with laying up the luncheon

and don't talk so much.

- I wondered what she'd been cooking when there's

no upstairs luncheon.

It's nice for us at any rate.

- Huh, not for us Ruby, my love,

we'll have yesterday's leftovers at twelve o'clock.

(Missus Bridges humming)

- Edward, listen to this.

Some of the gowns, Miss Georgina Worsley wore a gown

of black tulle with a coat with gray and silver

embroidery and crystal beads in a diamante design.

- Isn't it lovely?

- Yes, but it didn't aught to be left

in a heap on the floor.

In Lady Marjorie's day she'd have had it made

and been put to bed proper.

- I would have waited up for her.

- Don't talk simple, housemaids can't work all night

and work all day.

- Miss Georgina ought to have gone all in white,

virgin white.

- How could she with the court in mourning?

Royalty have got to stick together and pay respect,

just like anyone else otherwise they'll all be murdered.

Anyhow it's only half mourning,

not like last time when the king died,

then they was all in black from head to foot

for months on end, even at Ascot.

- Why was it only half mourning?

- Well, he was only a Serbian Archduke wasn't he?

- Here Rose.

- You put that down.

- Quadrille, Methusalem, Strauss,

Waltz, the Cinema Star, Gilbert, Waltz,

Destiny, Baines.

Here Rose look, B.L. four in a row,

that's the Honorable Billy Lynton that is.

-[Rose] Come on, we haven't got all day.

- She'll treasure that all her life.

The memory'll be like a beautiful dream.

- There's too much dreaming going on in this house

as it is, you know what I'm talking about, don't you?

You oughta wake up and be sensible.

- Well I can't help it if I love him, can I?

- Lord helps them who helps themselves.

You wanna be careful Daisy,

Mister Hudson finds out about you and Edward,

he'll turn you both out on the streets.

- It's not so awful is it?

We might get married.

- Servants can't get married, not junior servants anyhow.

You'll end up in the poor house the pair of you,

all like your ma and pa

and you'd think they'd be example enough for you.

Come on, the top ones are for Mrs. Bellamy's bedroom

and the bottom for Captain James.

Separate bedrooms and them not married two years.

There's another example for you.

- I should be out to lunch and dinner,

I have told Hudson.

-[Hazel] Yes, I know.

Thank you Hudson.

- Madame.

- Well we seem to be an even bigger mess than usual.

- It's a damn serious business.

These things all seem to happen on Sundays.

-[James] Do you think it'll lead to war now?

- It may well.

It's just the sort of thing to spark it off.

Well we'll just have to wait and see.

- You people in Parliament drive me mad.

First of all you turn a blind eye when the Belfast crowd

learn enough rifles and ammunition to arm themselves

to the teeth, and then when the Dublin crowd

does exactly the same thing and the British army

shoots a few of them, all you can say is,

"We'll have to wait and see."

It's incredible.

- I'm not exactly in the government James.

- Yes but you could do something about it.

- What would you do?

- Well I wouldn't use the army for a start.

And not with a mealy-mouthed pacifist behind them,

they might mutiny again.

And I wouldn't blame them.

No, I'd let them fight it out and good riddance.

Perhaps use the navy to blow Belfast and Dublin

into smithereens.

Winston Churchill can't wait to poop off his 16 inch guns

on his dread naught.

And that would finish the Irish problem once and for all.

-[Richard] It would finish you if you were Prime Minister.

- Which thank god I'm not.

Ireland on the brink of civil war.

The empire going to the dogs.

Half the country on strike.

Women throwing bombs in Westminster Abbey.

What a country.

We really are up the spout.

Well I must sweat off to the sweaty city.

At least if I was in Bombay,

I wouldn't have to wear these ridiculous clothes.

- Poor old James.

- Poor old James, up the spout.

That just about sums us up.

- Not your fault my dear.

- As much as it is his.

I haven't provided him with children for one thing.

Isn't that considered the principle duty of a wife?

- You can't help that, nobody can blame--

- He should never have fa-,

I should never have married him.

I'm not the right sort of person for James, Richard.

- Is anybody?

- Yes, one of those tough, bright, blue-blooded hunting

ladies who would have provided him with a brace of

tough, blue-blooded hunting children and then

amused herself with lovers.

And if James had complained she would have told him

to stop whining and find himself a mistress.

- Sounds an ideal marriage.

- It is what happens, isn't it?

From what I have observed of fashionable society,

it is what happens,

very civilized.

- Marriage a la mode, it didn't happen to me.

- Of course not.

I am glad it didn't.

- I'm afraid James' malaise, whatever it is,

goes deeper than that.

In biblical times,

they'd have said he was afflicted by a devil.

Well I must sweat off to sweaty Westminster

and listen to Mister Redmond telling Mister Carson

that he's a murderer,

and Mister Carson telling Mister Redmond that

he's an ignorant, papist cattle driver.

- Richard, I don't know if James is serious

about this directorship the Jordans have

offered him in India.

- Hard to tell in his present mood.

- If he is, I'm not going with him.

- No, I don't see you as a Memsaab.

- Even if he doesn't go, I shan't stay with him.

I wouldn't still be here if it wasn't for you,

and Georgina.

It's getting worse all the time.

We are driving each other nearly mad just by existing.

- Well could I?

- No, thank you.

- What shall you do, not back to your parents?

- Out of the frying pan, no.

I shall do what,

whatever James wants, divorce, desertion, separation.

Perhaps I could find a refuge

in my typewriting machine somewhere.

- I just wish.

- What?

- Nothing.

Oh dear.

- Yes,

oh dear.

(group laughing)

- Have another roll please, Mr. Lyons.

- Well I don't mind if I do.

- Mr. Hudson never touches eels.

- Oh?

- So I made him a special veal and ham.

- Well if I may be permitted an observation,

there's not a cook in the kingdom

can make an eel pie like yours.

- Oh.

- No, no, no, not, not even Missus Lewis or Missus Escofia,

both of whom I have the honor to supply with fish and game.

- Oh now Mister Lyons you're just saying that.

I believe you say the same thing to every cook

in Belgravia.

But if I might be permitted an observation.

It's the eel's what makes the pie.

And there's no one in London can touch you for eels.

- Well I have to admit when it comes to eels,

and handsome women, I'm a bit of a connoisseur.

- Dutch eels.

- Dutch eels and English women.

Though there, there my old father wouldn't have agreed.

Now he used to say that for firm flesh,

there was nothing like a Thames eel.

And that's what I say about English women.

(Missus Bridges laughing)

- Oh you are a wag Mr. Lyons.

Ruby.

Would you keep away from that hatch,

get on with the washing up.

Edward, pudding.

- Every eel that I purvey

is picked out individual with these two eyes.

I get a little lad to row me out to the Dutch eel boat

set out there in the pool of London,

full of tanks it is, and every tank full of eels.

And here's a fact of history for you.

There's only one boat allowed at a time

and there's always another waiting to take its place

up the estuary.

And that's been the case for oh 150 years or more.

Ever since the Dutch sailed up the Thames

and burned our English fleet.

- Well I never did.

- And quite right too, the fewer foreigners

we have in this town the better.

- No, there's enough troublemakers around

without adding to them.

Have you read the Times newspaper today, Mister Hudson?

- I have perused it briefly, yes.

-[Lyons] Well then, you just read that, oh, there.

- Thank you Edward.

To the Editor of the Times from the Secretary

of the Secret Commissions and Bribery Prevention

League, Incorporated, 3 Oxford Court, Cannon Street.

Dear sir, bribery and corruption amongst servants

and trades people are rampant in London.

Especially in the great houses of Belgravia and Mayfair.

- Bless my soul, I never heard nothing like that

in all my born days, what cheek.

- Here Ruby, help me listen.

- A gift to a servant as an inducement to show favor

to a tradesman dealing with a master and maid

without that master's consent is corruptly given.

- That's slander, that's blackmail and slander.

- Oh some crank I suppose,

jealous of our privileged position.

-[Missus Bridges] Well I don't know so much.

It's making out that tokens such as friends

like Mister Lyons presents us with from time to time

is bribes.

- All that cash and booze I get from the tradesman,

Christmas time you could stock a pub.

- That's wrong.

- You wait til you're a cook and I'm a butler.

- To the king and queen, well it's treason,

it's an insult to the Royal Coat of Arms.

- I'm surprised that the Times printing such blethers.

- Well it shows what evil-minded people

there is in this world.

- They put it in the Times so that

them upstairs'll read it and we'll get into trouble.

That's what they done it for.

- Now don't upset yourself unduly, Missus Bridges.

How about a wee dob of port for you Mister Lyons?

- Well now that'd be very nice I must say.

I hope that won't be construed as bribery and corruption.

- This way please.

-[Missus Bridges] Lunatics.

- Oh, just getting coffee for you Missus Bridges.

- Yes I'm sure you are, and good.

Dishes not touched yet Ruby.

- Just tidying up your table first Missus Bridges.

- You ought to be careful my girl,

one of these days them ears of yours will drop off.

- A woman of some spirit your Missus Bridges.

- Oh yes indeed Mister Lyons, she's a fine person.

- Mister Bridges was a very lucky man.

I take it he has, passed over.

- To my certain knowledge Mister Lyons

there has been no Mister Bridges.

- Oh.

- The title Missus being the usual honorarium

enjoyed by cooks of a certain class.

Cigar?

- Well no doubt some lucky man has already

found favor in her eyes?

- Put it down there Edward.

- Yes Mister Hudson.

-[Mister Hudson] Thank you.

- Hey?

- That is a delicate question Mister Lyons,

which only the lady in question could answer.

Well, Garponteo gave the American a good beating

the other evening.

- Ruby, I was right, Mister Lyons has baited his hook

and he's gone fishing and it's not for no dinner either.

- You mix the honey and the soft soap

and the gin

in equal proportions with the water.

- Give us a sip Rose?

- Oh get off Edward.

- Oh she's trying to soft soap me.

- Then you scrub the ribbon firmly with the mixture, thus.

Then you rinse the ribbon in cold water.

Daisy.

- Ow!

- Are you listening to me?

- Yes Rose.

- Rose, I'm just slipping out for a minute,

I'll be back after tea.

- Right you are Missus B.

- Then you fold the ribbon in a cloth

and iron it with a very hot iron,

swiftly so that it won't scorch.

- Ha-ha, blimey, if that act doesn't do the trick,

nothing will.

- Edward.

- Will you clean my ribbons for me when we're married,

eh love?

- Will you put that girl down, Edward.

-[Edward] All right.

- Now, let me see you do it.

- Hazel, I'm afraid I've had to telegram

Molly Chestershire and say, I won't be able to come down

with you and James for the party.

- Oh no.

But I'm rather dreading it.

And you were my only hope.

- Oh nonsense.

Goodwood's great fun, not a bit stuffy like Ascot.

- I bought a new hat, especially to dazzle you with.

- Well, you'll just have to dazzle everyone else.

- Bonnalaw wants him to stay with him at Wargrove,

to be closer to London.

The king and queen aren't going to Goodwood either,

are they?

- No, things are getting rather tricky.

- And they've moved the fleet to Scapath Flow

after the review.

Oh really, these wretched Irish.

- Well it's not altogether the Irish this time.

There's a flap on about this Balkin business.

- That has nothing to do with us, does it?

- Oh not yet it doesn't, but Austria's ultimatum

to Serbia expired yesterday, and she declared war today.

And Russia is Serbia's ally, and hates Austria.

And if Russia comes in, Germany is bound to help Austria.

And France has an alliance with Russia,

and we have an entente with France.

- It sounds a terrible tangle.

- That's exactly what it is.

Except the only way to untangle it is not with gunpowder.

- Well what's the difference between an alliance

and an entente?

- Well, one is written down and the other's a sort of

gentleman's agreement.

- Do we always have to behave like gentlemen?

- It might be difficult to avoid at this time.

We've suggested a peace conference,

but Belding won't have it.

I don't trust that damn kaiser.

The tricky devil.

- It all happened so suddenly.

I really don't believe it.

- Well all I can tell you is that my Margot Askworth

was sitting up in a gallery with those high toity ladies

from Alcester, whom she has not spoken a word to in months,

telling them that we were on the verge of a European war.

- She exaggerates everything.

- She is the prime minister's wife.

And Edward Gray had lunch with him today at number ten.

(door closing)

- Shall I have these taken up to your room, Miss Georgina?

- Oh, no thank you Hudson, just leave them there.

-[Richard] Hi Georgina.

-[Hazel] Have a tea.

- Oh lovely, I'm dying of thirst.

Uncle Richard.

- Yes?

- The legions have asked me to stay over the bank holiday.

Please, may I go?

- I thought that after the servicemen's ball,

you were coming back here for a proper rest.

- Yeah but Hazel, that's changed now.

-[Hazel] You seem very tired.

- I'm not.

I'm absolutely boiling with energy.

Anyway Lady L's the beadiest chaperon there is.

They've got a maid for me and everything.

Oh it'll be a tremendous rest really,

please say yes Uncle Richard.

- I don't seem to have much alternative, do I Hazel?

- I think it sounds like an ultimatum.

- (laughing) You're a darling.

I don't think there can be a nicer uncle in the whole world.

It's going to be such fun, and tons and tons of dancers.

And we're going to play charades at the trees.

Oh, and the Foxbroodens are having a masked ball.

I've bought the most splendid mask, I must show you.

- Sounds like a tremendous rest.

(Richard laughing)

-[Georgina] Guess what?

-[Both] Judy.

- Yes, because Billy Lynton is going as Punch.

- There won't be anyone here over the weekend.

- Oh, that's nice for the servants.

Well they can all go on holiday too.

- Yes they could.

Oh that would be all right, wouldn't it, Richard?

- Well, Marjorie used to,

well they can certainly have the day off.

The police at Gerald Row are very good at

keeping an eye on the house.

- Fourteen, fourteen and seven pence, three farthings

in the father's box, Mister Hudson.

- Thank you Rose, a handsome sum.

Most of it the result of Edward's

unfortunate lapses into blasphemy.

Now, his misdemeanors will be of benefit to all,

which is as it should be.

I suggest that as usual, the money should

pay for the projects of the freshmen to the outing.

And Missus Bellamy having generously agreed to pay

the fares for the whole weekend, and a little extra.

All right then.

Rose, you be treasurer, as always if you please.

- And where are we going to, Mister Hudson?

- Ah, that is for us all to decide, Missus Bridges.

- Well, we went to Clarktown last time, remember.

Remember they had a nice band.

- Oh yes, remember that salubrious east wind, Rose?

They caught you--

- Edward, that's enough.

Now then, any suggestions from the

junior members of the staff?

- Brookings is lovely.

- We haven't got a week off.

- Well, my mom once took us over to Herne Bay.

It was ever so nice, and we went from Channel Cross

on an excursion.

- Herne Bay, oh in Kent.

-[Daisy] That's right, it was ever so nice,

they had a pier.

- Well that's a funny thing, I was going,

Mister Lyons is going to Herne Bay to

a club outing or something.

- Well if it's good enough for Mister Lyons' club outing

I believe it will be good enough for us.

Let's have a wee show of hands on it.

Who's for Herne Bay?

Well, that's decided then, Herne Bay it is.

- I still say Clarktown.

- Well why don't you go there then,

and be the lonely rose of Clarktown.

(Daisy coughing)

-[Hudson] Come in.

- Might have a word with you, Mister Hudson.

- By all means Missus Bridges, come right in.

Let's sit you down.

How bout a little Brandy?

- Well, I won't say no.

(both laughing)

- In anticipation of our holiday so to speak.

Here we are then.

Here we are.

- Thank you.

- Your very good health, Missus Bridges.

- And yours, Mister Hudson.

Mister Hudson, I've been seeing Mister Lyons.

- Ah.

- There are indications that he's serious.

Stirrings in the wind, you might say.

- I see.

Well such as?

- Well, I've been to tea there twice now,

and the last time his only living relative, his sister,

come up from Wanstead special.

- Hm.

One swallow doesn't make a sour you know, Missus Bridges.

- Well then there's his manner,

his general behavior you might say.

I've been very perturbed.

- I would have thought it was more a time for rejoicing.

- On account of you, Angus.

I mean, when I had my bad trouble and

you were so very kind and

so very, very gallant,

we did sort of promise each other that we would

reserve ourselves for each other,

until such time as we should retire from service.

- Reservations can always be canceled, Kate.

Don't worry your head about that.

I cannot deny it, I shall miss you very much.

We shall all miss you.

But nothing must be allowed to stand in the way of

your future happiness and security.

- Thank you for those words.

You're a good and generous man.

- Well, now we really have got something to celebrate, eh?

- I feel like a rat deserting a sinking ship.

- I don't fully take the point of your metaphor.

- This household, I mean it's not that she is sinking

but it's very rocky.

All them aggravations and scratchings up there and

in all them Indian catalogs and that.

- Oh I think the state of affairs upstairs

however difficult they may appear to us,

should in no way influence your decision.

- Do you think I ought to tell them?

- No, no not yet.

While I'm in no way implying that I doubt Mister Lyons

good intentions, I should nevertheless counsel you to wait

for a wee bit, until his proposal takes a more

solid form.

- Yes,

thank you, Angus.

- What?

- What does it look?

It's by Parlay from a drawing by Baxt.

He designs all the clothes for the Russian ballet.

- Very nice, I'm sure.

- Well don't you approve, Rose?

It's too daring.

- Oh, I've seen more daring than that in this very room.

I remember when Miss Elizabeth put on a Moorish kaftan,

with no corsets underneath.

That was years ago, you should've seen her mother's face.

- Funny, everyone talks about Elizabeth

as if she still lived here.

I mean downstairs you still call this

Miss Elizabeth's room, don't you?

- Well yes, I suppose we do.

Just habit.

- I feel I know her quite well.

Even thought I've never met her.

- Well she'll probably be over from New York

one of these days,

with husband and children.

- Was she like me, Rose?

- No, not really.

She was very pretty.

- Prettier than me?

- (laughing) Different.

She found life difficult.

- Difficult?

- Yes, Miss Elizabeth didn't like things as they were.

She always wanted to change everything.

It was as if she had to make a fight out of everything.

She wouldn't go to balls and parties,

or be taken out by nice young men.

- Hm yes, she was quite different.

Oh I love every second of life, more and more.

I just wish this summer would go on and on

forever and ever.

- I don't know what you do with your shoebags,

Miss Georgina.

-[Georgina] I'm sorry Rose, they all just seem to get lost.

- Well, I'll just have to run up some more.

Germany declares war on Russia.

Running on hopes.

I don't know what they're gonna say about

shoes wrapped in newspaper.

- I'll explain Rose, I'll say, we're mouse poor

and can't afford anything but.

- Whoo, that heat,

it's scorching out there in that kitchen.

- Why don't you have some nice barley root tea--

- It was sweltering hot at the Argo,

but it didn't stop Jack Hobbs scoring another century.

Oh and the way he square a Carson,

forearms are tempered steel, the eye of an eagle.

- No doubt the results of squelching

half the class in French, where they're mobilizing for war.

- Well Hudson as long as we don't get into it.

- It's nothing to do with us what goes on in France,

Germany, and Russia.

- It's got everything to do with us, Rose.

- Well I don't see what it's got to do with any of it,

Mister Hudson.

To hell with Serbia.

- Well, if you ask me,

that kaiser warrants teaching a lesson.

He's been puffing his snoot at us for far too long now.

- Well, I don't see why we should get involved in a

bloody war just to settle old scores

between France and Germany.

- It is our duty Rose,

we are the only people that can beat Germany.

And we don't win, the word honor should forever be

expunged from the English language.

- Just because your great great uncle fought with

the Irelanders at Bortelu.

- We are not fit, we need a bit of the old discipline.

All this trouble in Ireland, and in, in an industry.

The other day someone even threatened the king.

- Dear.

- You know the lower classes are far too

flabby and pampered.

A wee bit of bloodletting will do this country

a pile of good.

- If that there kaiser has the impudence to come over here,

I'll give him what for.

- (laughing) That's right, Missus Bridges.

- Oh I will, I'll tell you, I will.

I'll, oh I'll pull every feather out of his helmet.

(Edward laughing)

- We've been throwing away all our money,

and now Rose look what I got.

- Oh.

- And look what I got.

- Hey now, you'll get arrested for indecent exposure.

(laughing)

- War latest, invasion of France,

Germany marches.

War latest.

Invasion of France, Germany marches.

War latest, invasion of France, Germany marches.

(waves crashing)

(Hudson laughing)

War latest, invasion of France, Germany marches.

(group laughing)

(group talking muffled by water splashing)

- Come on in, Missus Bridges,

-[Both] It's lovely.

- Whoa-oh!

- (laughing) Missus Bridges.

- I'm terrible, I'm going to drown.

-[Rose] Here you are, here Missus Bridges, there.

- Just waiting for you to fall again (laughing).

-[Paperboy] War latest, invasion in France,

Germany marches.

- Here, my boy.

Let me have one.

Thank you.

-[Paperboy] Germany marches.

- I love you, Daisy.

Honest.

- I know you do, Ed.

-[Paperboy] War latest.

- I love you too, but what's the use,

Rose says that if Mister Hudson finds out--

- Rose isn't marrying you, is she?

- I'll be a butler one day and,

well there are lots of places in the country

that take married couples, good wages too.

- And then there's this war.

- Ah, it's just the newspapers exaggerating.

It won't effect us.

And if we do have to go in,

it's only a job for the army and navy.

- I don't know so much.

Mister Hudson, you know, you'd think he was

the whole British army, the way he goes on.

He'll make you join up, 'cause he's too old.

- You see if he will.

Now come on, cheer up, we're on holiday.

- Yeah.

-[Rose] Shall I get the pie?

-[Missus Bridges] Yes, you get the pie here (muffled).

- Edward, Daisy.

- Come on.

You all right?

(couple laughing)

-[Missus Bridges] Oh here they come, at last.

- You two come in (voice muffled by rocks scraping).

- Aye, just like Bridlington.

- She had better things to do.

- Now you two drink up your soup while it's hot.

Otherwise you'll catch your death of cold.

- 100,000 Germans march in Luxenburg.

- Oh Mister Hudson,

now stop your warmongering for a minute.

Have a piece of my nice chicken pie.

- Oh, thank you Missus Bridges, thank you.

You've excelled yourself, Missus Bridges, excellent.

(Edward laughing)

(woman laughing)

- Georgina.

Georgina.

Georgina?

(Georgina breathing heavily)

Georgina.

Georgina.

Georgina.

(Georgina laughing)

Georgina.

Georgina.

- Oh, I am your slave tonight.

- Listen, Georgina.

- You're all huffing puffing, puffing Billy.

- Georgina, I'd love to talk to you, but I mean properly.

David's just telephoned.

They've canceled Carols.

- Oh no, but I've never been to Carols, goodness how sad.

- It means things are pretty serious.

- Why is everyone fussing about this silly old war.

Well it's just something happening abroad.

It's like the famine in India, or the earthquake in Turkey.

It has nothing to do with us.

- David says we'll be in by tomorrow.

- Tomorrow?

Did he really say tomorrow?

-[Billy] I mean it's pretty exciting really.

- Well yes, yes it's thrilling.

But it's pretty frightening.

- The trouble is, I don't know what to do.

- Nor do I.

Have you asked your father?

- Well, sort of, he says go up to Scotland,

then back to Oxford.

Carry on as usual.

But that's no good, what if it really is war?

- I know.

- I mean I'm,

I'm not a very military sort of person, really.

I'm sure I'll make a hopeless soldier.

I always hated field days at school.

- Couldn't you wait a bit then?

- What, no.

It's only gonna last a few months,

well it might last six with any luck.

David says the nations can't afford any war.

They'll all be bankrupt.

- Oh.

- So if I'm not quick, I might miss it all together.

That would be awful.

- Yes, that would be awful.

- I mean I can't shirk it like some damn crawly socialist.

Well you do see that, don't you?

- Yes, but they--

- That's why I had to talk to you, you see,

in case it all happens very quickly and

we don't have a chance to see each other again.

I just wanted to say that I love you.

- Oh Billy.

- And I don't love anyone else, Georgina.

I love you, very much.

I wouldn't have said all this like this, normally.

(bell ringing)

(couple laughing and talking)

-[Georgina] I'll beat you.

-[Billy] All right, if you must.

(upbeat, bouncy music)

* I'm Gilbert, the Filbert

* The knut with a K

* The pride of Piccadilly

- We'll dine in the coffee room.

* The blase roue

* Oh, Hades, the ladies

* Who leave their wooden huts

* For Gilbert, the Filbert

* The Colonel of the Knuts

* I'm Gilbert, the Filbert

* The knut with a K

* The pride of Piccadilly

* The blase roue

* Oh, Hades, the ladies who leave their wooden huts

* For Gilbert, the Filbert

- Poor Missus Bridges, she can't find her gentlemen friend.

-[Edward] Probably off fishing.

* For Gilbert, the Filbert

* The Colonel of the Knuts

(audience applauding)

-[Singer] And now, by special request,

I am calling upon Uncle Angus

to give us on of his special poems.

Uncle Angus!

(audience applauding)

- It's your fault.

Hey, I could do with like an intro to this.

- Yes.

(dramatic piano music)

- There's a one-eyed yellow idol

to the north of Kathmandu.

There's a little marble cross below the town,

and a brokenhearted woman

tends the grave of Mad Carew,

while the yellow god forever gazes down.

He was known as Mad Carew

by the subs at Kathmandu,

he was hotter than they felt inclined to tell,

but, for all his foolish pranks,

he was worshiped in the ranks,

and the Colonel's daughter smiled on him as well.

He had loved her all along

With the passion of the strong--

- Sorry to interrupt Uncle Angus boys and girls,

but I've just got some news come in on the wire.

The king of the Belgians has appealed to his majesty,

King George the Fifth, for help.

(audience applauding)

Now, remembering

all our brave gentiles

guarding and manning their guns in the Atlantic,

let us all stand and sing a verse of Rule, Brittania.

(audience cheering)

* When Britain first

* At heaven's command

* Arose from out the azure main

* Arose, arose, arose from out the azure main

* This was the charter

* The charter of the land

* And Guardian Angels

* Sang this strain

* Rule, Britannia

* Britannia, rule the waves

* Britons never, never, never

* Shall be slaves

- Hip, hip,

-[Crowd] Hooray!

- I'm glad you enjoyed it.

Did you enjoyed it?

- Oh yes. - I'm quite sleepy now.

Are you sleepy?

- Oh, okay, mam.

(crowd buzzing)

- Look, it's late I think we best go down to the station.

- Oh, Mister Hudson, I ain't ready to go.

- If it ain't Rose, hello there.

Oh, don't you smell lovely, eh?

(slurring) my old bag of lard and all.

- That's not your intended Albert.

- Oh it is, it ain't the way she looks,

it's the way she cooks (laughing).

She might call herself Bridges,

but she's as pure as the driven snow,

aren't you my darling?

- Don't you touch me Albert Lyons.

- Ain't she a lovely bird, lovely plump gray.

What's your price there then, eh Bill?

- I'll give 10 pence a pound on plat.

- On plat, god's sake Parker,

wait til I get air between my legs, then I go all--

- How dare you, get away from her.

(people yelling over each other)

- Hey calm down now, take it easy now.

Come on, sit down.

(Missus Bridges crying)

- Good morning, Hudson.

- Good morning, madam.

Good morning, sir.

- Good morning, Hudson.

We are back early because I'm going soldiering.

- Yes sir.

- Oh and may we have coffee and biscuits in the morning

on please, Hudson?

- Certainly, mam.

- Oh yes, and pay off the cab, will you?

And please go pack my army kit and all my camping stuff

I'll shall wear service dress.

- Very good, sir.

- Mister Hudson.

- Yes, Rose, put them down there please.

- Mister Lyons is at the back door.

- Mister Lyons?

- Wants to see Missus Bridges.

- The insolence, where is Missus Bridges?

- She's gone shopping.

- Gone shopping, at this hour?

The whole world's gone (mumbling).

Rose, go down and get rid of him.

- Oh, but Mister Hudson--

- Now do as I say, I don't care how you do it,

and get Edward.

No, no I'll get Edward.

Look how much is it in your clock?

-[Daisy] Rose.

- You mind your own business and get on with your work.

- Well?

- Missus Bridges has asked me--

- Where is she Rose, I've got to talk to her.

- Well she don't wanna talk to you.

- Rose, you and me, we've always been the best of friends

now haven't we?

- That's news to me.

- Well, you come down to my shop,

I have something special for you,

something you'll really like, eh?

- Yes I'm sure you will, Mister Lyons, thanks for nothing.

- Now, now, Rose, look Rose,

Yow, oh, you little fouled!

Oh!

- Missus Bridges has asked me to inform you

that she's no longer available

and don't want to see you no more, not ever again.

And further to that effect, this household will no longer

require your services as purveyor of fish and poultry.

- Now Rose, I wanna talk to Mister Hudson,

Rose, Rose.

- Thank god there's something positive at last,

even those damn pacifists in the government

can't get out of it now.

- Well if it makes you any happier, Moreland and company

resigned today. - Thank you, Edward.

- Madam.

- It was Edward Gray's speech that did it,

you have never heard such a reception.

After that, there was no doubt that

if Germany went into Belgium,

we'd go in.

- Oh, it's like a breath of fresh air.

It's extraordinary.

The station, streets, everyone smiling and happy,

it's brought us all together.

Instead of fighting each other,

we can get on with thrashing that damn kaiser.

- Well I wish it could've been decided peacefully.

- It couldn't, don't you see, they want war.

They've been strutting up and down

and saber rattling and growling for years.

And now we've got to win.

Otherwise the world won't be a fit place

for human beings to live in.

Let's do it properly while we're about it,

smash or be smashed.

The war to end all wars.

- All ready, Mister Hudson.

- Oh, thank you, Edward.

- Why is he going so soon if war's not been declared yet?

- Captain James is in the regular army's

reserve of officers, Edward.

Well done, all right, you can take it all up now.

There we are.

Careful now, mind how you go.

- There, same hole as the day I was commissioned.

No pouting.

- Everything is loaded, sir.

- Thank you, Hudson.

Well, goodbye father.

I can try and let you know where the front is.

- Goodbye old boy.

- Goodbye honey.

- Take care of yourself.

- Very well.

Don't worry about us.

(Hazel crying)

Look after yourself.

Keep an eye on father,

make sure he doesn't work you too hard.

- Good luck, sir.

- And, don't let Hudson sneak off and join up.

He will you know, if you don't watch him.

- Don't you dare, Hudson.

- No sir.

- You can't go now.

- No I can't, can I?

- I don't think that I,

I don't think that any of us

could've managed without you anyway.

- Oh Rose, you didn't ought to have said such things,

really, you didn't.

Not without asking me.

- After what happened yesterday?

- Oh well of course you was right, of course you was.

And it's good riddance and that's a fact.

Now we've got more important things to think about.

Can you manage that?

- I expect so.

- That's right.

Now, let me see.

- What on earth, what is all this, Missus Bridges?

- Oh just a few provisions, Mister Hudson.

Perhaps you haven't read the papers.

Well there's gonna be privations and shortages,

and prices going up.

- But this is hoarding, Missus Bridges.

- I don't care what it is.

Rose, see that that ham is properly hung up on the hook.

If that there kaiser's coming over here,

bombarding and besieging us like they says he is,

I'm not letting this household go short.

Oh!

-[Crowd] We want war, we want war, we want war!

- Well they're going to get their war, old wretches.

- Is it going to be very bad?

- Very bad, for very long, at least that's what I think.

Is that a sketch enough?

- It's extraordinary.

But I feel a tremendous sense of relief.

As if a spring had been released somewhere inside me.

- Jones is not the only one who needed the war

to cast out his devil.

Thousands and thousands of people all over Europe are

marching up and down, happy and joyful,

screaming their heads off for it.

We're all praying to the same God for victory.

Poor God.

He's got a hard time ahead.

- Perhaps it was his idea.

Well at least we can say we're going in to help out France.

- Or little Belgium.

Oh yes, we can beat our breasts with a clear conscience.

But there's a good practical reason as well.

Antwerp is still a pistol, pointed at Eve's head.

- It's five minutes to 11, sir.

- Oh thank you, Hudson.

- Shall I open the bottle, sir?

- Ah, no thank you.

But do have a drink downstairs if you feel like celebrating.

- Oh, thank you, sir.

- Last night, Edward Gray looked out across the park

and said, "The lamps are going out all over Europe.

"We shall not see them lit again in our lifetime."

I'm too old for war, Hazel.

This means the end of that pleasant order of things

that I've known and lived and loved.

The end forever.

- I do see.

- Hello.

- There's Georgina.

Hello Billy.

- Hello sir.

- The whole of London has gone mad.

We've been to the most gorgeous war party at the Ritz,

everyone was there.

And Billy met a nice colonel,

who promised to help him get a commission in the brigadiers.

And I've come to a great decision, Uncle Richard.

I'm going to be a nurse so that I can be with the army.

- Champagne please, Billy.

- Yes, sir.

- I hate to dampen your ardor but I hope that

neither of you has anything to do with this war.

You're both far too young.

(cork popping)

(crowd singing "Onward, Christian Soldiers")

I refuse to drink a toast to war.

From battle and murder and from sudden death,

good lord, deliver us.

- Oh, thank you, Rose.

- Mister Hudson, you should've seen the crowds outside

Buckingham Palace, they're all singing and shouting

at the top of their voices--

- You all help yourself to some vino.

- Oh thanks Mister Hudson.

- And we saw the king and the queen,

and the Prince of Wales come out to the balcony.

- And then we saw Missus Churchill, Mister Askowitz,

and Lord Daltor as clear as anything.

And then there was a bloke that climbed up on the balcony,

when they came out--

- Quiet, hey look.

(explosions booming) (bells tolling)

This is an historic moment

in the history of our country and our empire.

We are now at war with Germany.

Our cause is a righteous one.

With the lord mighty in battle, give us victory.

God save the king.

- God save the king.

(explosions booming)

(light, uplifting orchestra music)