Original subtitles

Oh, my God, feel better, Cody.

I wanna sign it next.

'Sup.

I'll carry your books, Cody.

Butt-Head, what's going on?

Why are all those chicks being nice to Cody when he sucks?

Uh, I think it's 'cause he has a cast.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, they feel sorry for him and stuff.

And when chicks feels sorry for you,

you're halfway to scoring.

Yeah, they sign your cast, and then they, like,

do other stuff.

You know what I'm saying?

Wait a minute.

Beavis, you gotta break my arm so I can get a cast on it.

Yeah, and then you can break my arm, too,

and then we'll both score.

Yeah.

No, that would be too much.

If everyone has a cast, then no one has a cast or something.

Now, mess my arm up real good.

Okay, okay.

I'm gonna go ahead and just break this bad boy.

Yeah.

Just break it already, dumbass.

Lift with your legs or something.

Uh!

Damn it, Beavis, I said break it.

Don't hurt it.

Ah!

I guess we're gonna have to think of some other way.

Well, no one ever got any thinking done here at school.

You know, they should have a place where you can,

like, learn how to do stuff.

Like, if there was something you didn't know,

there would be people who would, like, teach it to you.

You know?

That would make too much sense, Beavis.

Yeah, really.

Hi.

Welcome to Y2K'S "Big Fun, Fun Show."

I'm your host, Y2K.

I'd like to introduce you to today's very fun,

very special guest, Baby No Money.

Baby No Money?

Most rappers, like, brag about how much money they have,

but not Baby No Money.

He's poor.

Yeah.

He's got the lowest self-esteem in hip-hop.

He got his suit at the Goodwill.

He's one of those guys who sings all, like, drowsy,

like he's taking sleeping pills.

Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, everyone sings like that, yeah.

Yeah, sometimes I talk like that

when I take a bunch of codeine cough syrup, you know?

Maybe these guys, like, take cough syrup all the time,

and they're like, um-- like, um--

what's that word when you take something

all the time and you can't stop?

It's like addic--addic-- a dick--

I think the word you're looking for is cool.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, that's it. Yeah.

Yeah, my uncle is cool to, uh, crystal meth.

Boy, cool can mean a lot of things, can't it?

The word cool is cool.

Oh, no.

Wha--what? What?

When I see puppets, I know what comes next.

They're gonna try to teach me how to read.

Oh, God, yeah.

All puppets ever talk about his letters.

Yeah, it's like, uh, it's like,

after A, B, C, D, the rest is just a blur, you know?

You said D.

You know, I used to watch that "Muppet Show" sometimes.

But like, except for that one really hot pig,

there's nothing good on it.

Uh, oh, yeah.

She's what they call a PILF.

Yeah.

Yeah, there you go with letters again, Butt-Head.

Come on.

Okay, Beavis.

I'm gonna lie down, and you're gonna ride down

the hill and run over my arm.

Okay.

Ready?

Ready.

Go.

Ah!

Fire!

Ah!

Uh, what happened?

I don't know.

I had my eyes closed.

Uh, so did I.

But it felt like I hit your arm pretty hard.

I mean, I went flying and my head hurts.

Uh, wow.

That didn't hurt at all.

I didn't even feel it.

Well, it must be 'cause I hit it so hard.

Is it broken?

Probably.

Uh, damn it.

I don't even have a scratch.

Whoa, really?

That's crazy.

It definitely sounded like I hit the sweet spot, you know?

The problem is, my arms are too strong.

Yeah, yeah. That's how they get you.

You're gonna have to do it again.

I'll--I'll try, but like, my arm really hurts,

and it's, like, bent funny, and I can't move it so good.

I don't care about your problems, Beavis.

I care about broken arms.

Yeah, yeah, that's true. Yeah.

Sorry.

Now, get back up there so I can score.

Uh, yeah, yeah, okay.

Ow.

Hurry up.

Ow.

Let's see, there's gotta be something

in here that can break my arm.

Whoa.

You boys don't touch the scissor lift, all right?

Employees only.

Whoa.

If we're not allowed to touch it,

it must be really dangerous, yeah.

I can stick my hand in the machinery.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Good idea.

Now, get up there and start pressing buttons.

Okay, you got it.

Ow.

Let's see here.

There's a lot of buttons.

Where to begin?

That's the wrong way, dumbass.

You need to, like, lower it.

Uh, I can't make it stop.

I'm trying. It keeps going up.

What are you doing up there, butthole?

Quit choking your chicken and get down here and break my arm.

Okay, okay.

Let me try this button here.

Let's just see if this--

whoa!

Uh. Uh-oh.

Damn it. Get back here.

Oh, no.

Butt-Head!

Butt-Head, what do I do?

I can't make it stop.

Damn it.

Hey, hey, hey.

Where am I going?

What's going on, Butt-Head?

Oh, no, no, no.

Ah! Somebody help!

Hey, watch where you're going!

Sorry down there.

I--I can't control--ah!

Hey, hey. Look out.

No!

Hey, what's going on?

Hey, do you know how to work this thing?

Ah! No! No!

Hey, you're all going the wrong way.

Come on. Learn how to drive.

Hey, hey.

Hey, hey, look out. Ah!

No, no, no.

Whoa.

Oh, I made it.

Glad that's over.

Butt-Head, you finally came!

Yeah, I thought you might have

got some Jell-O or something.

No, no.

They say I can't chew Jell-O yet.

But, I mean, check out my cast.

The chicks can sign all over me.

It's full body, you know?

Uh, no.

By the time they let you out of here,

school will be over for the summer.

All the chicks will be gone already.

Oh. Oh, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, but someone's probably signed my cast, right?

Uh, let's see.

Nope.

Well, that sucks.

Well, visiting hours are over.

Let me know if you get some Jell-O.

Chirp.