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1
00:00:02,269 --> 00:00:03,837
♪ MTV ♪
2
00:00:25,525 --> 00:00:27,894
Well,
today's the day, Beavis.
3
00:00:29,229 --> 00:00:32,232
We got some weights, and
we're finally gonna get swole.
4
00:00:32,233 --> 00:00:33,566
Yep.
5
00:00:33,567 --> 00:00:35,202
We're always talking
about getting ripped.
6
00:00:35,302 --> 00:00:37,236
Finally time to do it.
Yeah.
7
00:00:39,206 --> 00:00:41,674
Oh, yeah. Ugh.
8
00:00:41,675 --> 00:00:45,210
Oh, yeah. There we go.
9
00:00:45,211 --> 00:00:46,914
Getting some gains.
10
00:00:47,014 --> 00:00:50,216
I think
I'm already pretty jacked.
11
00:00:53,220 --> 00:00:56,388
Excuse me, I live downstairs.
What is that noise?
12
00:00:56,389 --> 00:00:59,226
Uh, what noise?
13
00:00:59,326 --> 00:01:00,794
Yeah, we might be, like,
too swole to hear it.
14
00:01:00,795 --> 00:01:02,128
Yeah.
15
00:01:03,463 --> 00:01:05,499
I'm sorry, could you
just please be quieter?
16
00:01:05,599 --> 00:01:08,101
I work from home.
- Whoa.
17
00:01:08,102 --> 00:01:09,869
You work from home?
18
00:01:09,870 --> 00:01:13,140
So you, like, live at your job?
19
00:01:13,240 --> 00:01:16,909
Right, so it's important
that it's quiet so I can work.
20
00:01:16,910 --> 00:01:18,645
Then it's a good thing
you live at your job
21
00:01:18,646 --> 00:01:20,179
and not downstairs
'cause these weights
22
00:01:20,180 --> 00:01:22,615
probably make a lot of noise.
23
00:01:22,616 --> 00:01:25,451
Just please stop
with the noise.
24
00:01:26,753 --> 00:01:28,454
Did you hear that, Beavis?
25
00:01:28,455 --> 00:01:31,625
That butthole lives at his job.
26
00:01:31,725 --> 00:01:33,426
Lucky son of a bitch.
27
00:01:33,427 --> 00:01:35,628
We have to live in
this apartment that sucks.
28
00:01:35,629 --> 00:01:38,130
Yeah, really.
It's a mess.
29
00:01:38,131 --> 00:01:40,167
No one ever does
anything about it.
30
00:01:40,267 --> 00:01:41,501
Yeah, yeah.
31
00:01:41,602 --> 00:01:43,535
It didn't look like this
when we moved in.
32
00:01:43,536 --> 00:01:45,271
Somebody pulled
a fast one on us.
33
00:01:45,272 --> 00:01:46,672
Yeah.
34
00:01:46,673 --> 00:01:47,974
Wait a second, Beavis.
35
00:01:48,075 --> 00:01:49,943
If we had a job
in a place that's better
36
00:01:50,043 --> 00:01:52,846
than our apartment,
we could live there instead.
37
00:01:54,614 --> 00:01:56,650
We used to have jobs
at Burger World.
38
00:01:56,750 --> 00:01:59,018
There was always food there,
as I recall, yeah.
39
00:02:00,421 --> 00:02:02,689
I bet we still have
our old uniforms.
40
00:02:10,530 --> 00:02:12,832
So I looked
at your applications,
41
00:02:12,833 --> 00:02:14,867
and your names are
already in the system.
42
00:02:14,868 --> 00:02:16,669
Look, I'm in a bind here.
43
00:02:16,670 --> 00:02:18,339
Can you take the shift
right now?
44
00:02:18,439 --> 00:02:19,839
Reuben and Andre flaked.
45
00:02:19,840 --> 00:02:21,841
Uh, yeah.
46
00:02:21,842 --> 00:02:23,176
And we brought
our suitcases, yeah.
47
00:02:24,311 --> 00:02:26,011
I'll go get
your paperwork going.
48
00:02:26,012 --> 00:02:28,748
Well, Beavis, let's move in.
49
00:02:31,651 --> 00:02:33,553
Yeah.
50
00:02:41,361 --> 00:02:43,797
Now we're talking.
51
00:02:45,499 --> 00:02:47,834
Home sweet home.
52
00:02:49,970 --> 00:02:53,806
♪ Walk on by ♪
53
00:02:53,807 --> 00:02:56,342
Whoa.
Whoa, what is that thing?
54
00:02:58,178 --> 00:03:01,748
Uh, I think it's, like,
from Dr. Seuss or something.
55
00:03:02,916 --> 00:03:04,584
Oh, yeah, yeah.
56
00:03:04,685 --> 00:03:07,120
You know, the thing about
Dr. Seuss is,
57
00:03:07,220 --> 00:03:08,955
he's not very good, you know?
58
00:03:08,956 --> 00:03:12,125
It's like, he'll say, like,
59
00:03:12,126 --> 00:03:15,261
"There's a cloothplush
on my toothbrush,"
60
00:03:15,362 --> 00:03:17,863
and he just draws
a fake animal, you know?
61
00:03:17,864 --> 00:03:20,299
Anyone could do that.
62
00:03:23,070 --> 00:03:26,105
Dr. Seuss sucks.
63
00:03:26,106 --> 00:03:27,673
See, it's like
that chick there,
64
00:03:27,674 --> 00:03:31,911
you know, I could say,
"Oh, that chick is named Zood,
65
00:03:31,912 --> 00:03:35,781
and she gives me wood, see?"
66
00:03:35,782 --> 00:03:37,984
Uh... whoa.
67
00:03:37,985 --> 00:03:40,653
That was pretty good, Beavis.
68
00:03:40,654 --> 00:03:42,588
Whoa, we should write
a children's book.
69
00:03:42,589 --> 00:03:45,058
Oh, yeah, yeah.
70
00:03:45,059 --> 00:03:46,293
Yeah, I mean,
it's easy, you know?
71
00:03:46,393 --> 00:03:48,361
Anyone can do it.
72
00:03:48,362 --> 00:03:52,466
Uh, we'll call it
"Zong and His Schlong."
73
00:03:54,735 --> 00:03:56,569
Or I know, I know.
74
00:03:56,570 --> 00:03:58,671
Is this the land of Zoing?
75
00:03:58,672 --> 00:04:01,608
That's where I'm going.
76
00:04:01,609 --> 00:04:04,978
Because the chicks there
make me go, boi-oi-oi-oing.
77
00:04:06,613 --> 00:04:08,748
And then, like,
that animal there,
78
00:04:08,749 --> 00:04:11,151
we could call it a Lumbass.
79
00:04:11,251 --> 00:04:14,486
And then, like, someone
could say, "What is that?
80
00:04:14,487 --> 00:04:16,823
It is a Lumbass, you dumbass."
81
00:04:18,158 --> 00:04:20,326
Next thing you know,
we're beloved by children.
82
00:04:20,327 --> 00:04:21,827
Yeah.
83
00:04:21,828 --> 00:04:25,165
There once was a Kwut
who looked like a butt.
84
00:04:25,266 --> 00:04:29,569
When he stood up,
people said, uh, what?
85
00:04:29,570 --> 00:04:31,070
Or something.
86
00:04:31,071 --> 00:04:32,339
Yeah, yeah, see?
See?
87
00:04:32,439 --> 00:04:35,141
That's like-- that's like
10 pages right there.
88
00:04:35,142 --> 00:04:36,676
Oh, yeah.
89
00:04:36,677 --> 00:04:39,646
OK, Beavis, get to work
drawing a Kwut.
90
00:04:39,647 --> 00:04:41,647
OK, yeah.
91
00:04:41,648 --> 00:04:43,483
Yeah, OK,
what does it look like?
92
00:04:43,484 --> 00:04:45,184
Uh, I already told you.
93
00:04:45,185 --> 00:04:46,752
He looks like a butt.
94
00:04:46,753 --> 00:04:49,490
You're just like the Lumbass
who's a dumbass.
95
00:04:49,590 --> 00:04:50,823
Oh, yeah.
96
00:04:50,824 --> 00:04:51,991
I love that guy, yeah.
97
00:04:51,992 --> 00:04:53,360
OK, let me put that in there.
98
00:04:53,460 --> 00:04:55,228
Wait a minute.
99
00:04:55,229 --> 00:04:58,364
You know, "Lumbass the Dumbass"
could be a whole other book.
100
00:04:58,365 --> 00:04:59,999
We could have two books.
101
00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:02,368
Uh... oh, yeah.
102
00:05:02,369 --> 00:05:04,204
I mean, you could do
a whole series, you know?
103
00:05:04,304 --> 00:05:05,338
You could do, like, um,
104
00:05:05,339 --> 00:05:07,074
"Kwut the Butt
Goes to the Doctor."
105
00:05:07,174 --> 00:05:09,042
Yeah.
106
00:05:10,211 --> 00:05:12,545
His name was Dr. Zucks,
and he sucks.
107
00:05:13,947 --> 00:05:15,882
Boy, this stuff
just writes itself.
108
00:05:15,883 --> 00:05:17,550
Yeah.
109
00:05:18,652 --> 00:05:20,219
He had a friend
named McVestibles,
110
00:05:20,220 --> 00:05:22,789
who looked like
a pair of testicles.
111
00:05:24,525 --> 00:05:25,891
Yeah,
we'll probably even, like,
112
00:05:25,892 --> 00:05:28,928
win an award for, like,
teaching kids about their--
113
00:05:28,929 --> 00:05:31,265
you know, their body parts.
You know, we make it fun.
114
00:05:32,699 --> 00:05:34,600
The award was
called the Schnads,
115
00:05:34,601 --> 00:05:36,870
and it looked like
a pair of golden nads.
116
00:05:39,072 --> 00:05:40,673
Oh, oh,
and then maybe someone
117
00:05:40,674 --> 00:05:43,577
will make it into a movie,
so we don't have to read it.
118
00:05:43,678 --> 00:05:45,478
Yeah.
119
00:05:45,479 --> 00:05:48,082
Th-- that would be cool.
120
00:05:50,717 --> 00:05:52,252
You know how people
always say the book
121
00:05:52,253 --> 00:05:53,819
was better than the movie?
122
00:05:53,820 --> 00:05:56,122
No one will say that
about this movie.
123
00:05:57,891 --> 00:06:00,460
Yeah, it's gonna be cool.
124
00:06:05,799 --> 00:06:08,067
It doesn't get any better
than this, Beavis.
125
00:06:08,068 --> 00:06:10,804
Yep, we should have lived
at Burger World years ago.
126
00:06:17,444 --> 00:06:20,280
Hello?
Does anyone work here?
127
00:06:20,281 --> 00:06:22,782
Yes.
And we also live here.
128
00:06:22,783 --> 00:06:24,083
Yeah.
129
00:06:25,419 --> 00:06:28,921
Someone's at the drive-thru.
130
00:06:28,922 --> 00:06:31,958
Can you get me
a BW Junior Meal?
131
00:06:32,059 --> 00:06:35,328
- Can you get me some beers?
- What?
132
00:06:35,329 --> 00:06:37,630
Yeah, see, um,
we actually live here,
133
00:06:37,631 --> 00:06:40,467
so we need some beers.
You've got a car, right?
134
00:06:41,702 --> 00:06:43,469
Don't you work here?
135
00:06:43,470 --> 00:06:44,637
Yeah, yeah,
that's what I'm saying,
136
00:06:44,638 --> 00:06:46,272
but we also live here.
137
00:06:46,273 --> 00:06:47,773
So can you get us some beers?
138
00:06:47,774 --> 00:06:48,942
We only have six left,
139
00:06:49,042 --> 00:06:50,611
and we're taking them down
pretty good.
140
00:06:50,711 --> 00:06:53,412
Thank you. Drive through.
141
00:06:53,413 --> 00:06:55,748
Some chick at the drive-thru
142
00:06:55,749 --> 00:06:56,950
is going to make
a beer run for us.
143
00:06:58,152 --> 00:07:00,019
Well, as long as
we're hanging out at home,
144
00:07:00,020 --> 00:07:02,756
let's get swole.
- Yeah, cool.
145
00:07:07,561 --> 00:07:09,563
Between the new place,
the new job,
146
00:07:09,663 --> 00:07:13,065
and getting in shape,
things have never been better.
147
00:07:13,066 --> 00:07:15,368
Yeah, we're, like,
getting our lives together.
148
00:07:19,205 --> 00:07:21,208
Let's just go.
149
00:07:31,184 --> 00:07:33,018
Hey, I hate
to do this to you,
150
00:07:33,019 --> 00:07:35,088
but Annabelle called in sick.
151
00:07:35,089 --> 00:07:36,755
Could you possibly
do the closing shift
152
00:07:36,756 --> 00:07:38,691
and count the register?
- Yeah.
153
00:07:38,692 --> 00:07:40,761
We're not going anywhere.
154
00:07:40,861 --> 00:07:41,795
Yeah, we live here.
155
00:07:41,896 --> 00:07:42,995
Yeah.
156
00:07:42,996 --> 00:07:44,531
You practically do.
157
00:07:44,532 --> 00:07:47,267
You guys are gonna go far
with that attitude.
158
00:07:47,268 --> 00:07:50,604
Uh, I forgot who that guy is.
159
00:07:50,704 --> 00:07:52,605
Yeah, it doesn't matter.
160
00:07:52,606 --> 00:07:54,407
You know what, Beavis?
161
00:07:54,408 --> 00:07:56,410
Let's celebrate
our first day in our new home
162
00:07:56,510 --> 00:07:57,744
and go out for dinner.
163
00:07:57,745 --> 00:07:59,979
Good idea, Butt-Head.
164
00:07:59,980 --> 00:08:01,481
Yeah.
165
00:08:01,482 --> 00:08:04,318
Let me just borrow some money
from the register here.
166
00:08:08,288 --> 00:08:09,488
Yeah, look at this.
167
00:08:09,489 --> 00:08:12,025
We live close to
so many great places to eat.
168
00:08:12,125 --> 00:08:14,727
It's all about location.
169
00:08:16,530 --> 00:08:19,465
Two taco grandes, please.
170
00:08:19,466 --> 00:08:21,034
We're your new neighbors.
171
00:08:21,035 --> 00:08:23,636
We just moved into Burger World
across the street.
172
00:08:23,637 --> 00:08:24,971
Yep, we live there.
173
00:08:24,972 --> 00:08:26,139
Yeah.
174
00:08:26,140 --> 00:08:27,640
There's this chick
coming by with beers
175
00:08:27,641 --> 00:08:29,709
later, too, yeah.
176
00:08:29,710 --> 00:08:32,211
We left the door open for her.
177
00:08:32,212 --> 00:08:34,481
So you just left
the Burger World empty
178
00:08:34,482 --> 00:08:36,382
with the door unlocked?
- Yeah, yeah.
179
00:08:36,383 --> 00:08:38,352
Yeah, she's really cool.
She's got a car.
180
00:08:39,753 --> 00:08:41,620
Did you lock
the cash register?
181
00:08:41,621 --> 00:08:43,556
Uh, no.
182
00:08:43,557 --> 00:08:45,825
If I lock it, it's harder
to take the money out.
183
00:08:47,260 --> 00:08:48,561
Yeah, we left it open
so you can take the money out
184
00:08:48,562 --> 00:08:50,329
real easy, you know.
185
00:08:50,330 --> 00:08:52,098
It's a lot of money in there.
186
00:08:52,099 --> 00:08:54,535
You just open the drawer
and take it.
187
00:08:54,635 --> 00:08:57,203
It's pretty cool.
Neat system, yeah.
188
00:09:00,974 --> 00:09:03,543
Well, here's
to work from home.
189
00:09:03,544 --> 00:09:04,777
Yep.
190
00:09:04,778 --> 00:09:06,078
That's the way of the future.
191
00:09:06,079 --> 00:09:07,713
Uh-huh.
192
00:09:07,714 --> 00:09:10,251
I wonder if they're gonna
have scoring from home.
193
00:09:10,351 --> 00:09:13,052
Probably with computers,
you know?
194
00:09:13,053 --> 00:09:14,587
Yeah.
195
00:09:14,588 --> 00:09:17,091
We'll be dead by then.
196
00:09:17,191 --> 00:09:19,726
Whoa!
197
00:09:19,727 --> 00:09:21,561
Looks like there's a party
going on in our Burger World.
198
00:09:21,562 --> 00:09:23,063
Look.
199
00:09:23,163 --> 00:09:26,031
Uh, that chick must have
shown up with the beer
200
00:09:26,032 --> 00:09:27,500
and started without us.
201
00:09:27,501 --> 00:09:30,370
I like her style, yeah.
202
00:09:34,674 --> 00:09:35,909
Whoa.
203
00:09:36,009 --> 00:09:38,545
This neighborhood
knows how to party.
204
00:09:40,714 --> 00:09:42,782
And all the money's gone
from the register.
205
00:09:42,783 --> 00:09:44,049
That's OK.
206
00:09:44,050 --> 00:09:45,552
We'll make it
all back tomorrow.
207
00:09:45,553 --> 00:09:47,720
Our place pays
for itself now, Beavis.
208
00:09:48,889 --> 00:09:50,591
We finally turned
our life around.
209
00:09:54,394 --> 00:09:56,896
Good night, Beavis.
210
00:09:56,897 --> 00:10:00,233
Good night, Butt-Head.
211
00:10:14,915 --> 00:10:17,149
"Lumbass the Dumbass,"
212
00:10:17,150 --> 00:10:19,952
by Dr. Beavis
and Dr. Butt-Head,
213
00:10:19,953 --> 00:10:22,455
because Dr. Seuss sucks.
214
00:10:27,294 --> 00:10:30,230
Way down in the land
of Ziggity-Zutthole,
215
00:10:30,231 --> 00:10:33,267
there lived a guy
who was kind of a butthole.
216
00:10:36,403 --> 00:10:40,072
He was a weird-looking guy
whose name was Lumbass.
217
00:10:40,073 --> 00:10:43,610
He sucked.
He was a real dumbass.
218
00:10:46,714 --> 00:10:50,583
Lumbass the dumbass
sat around and ate smachos,
219
00:10:50,584 --> 00:10:53,386
which was a food pretty much
exactly like nachos.
220
00:10:56,657 --> 00:10:58,891
Lumbass knew a chick
in the hood
221
00:10:58,892 --> 00:11:00,893
named Zanktis Zunkey.
222
00:11:00,894 --> 00:11:04,297
She gave him wood,
so he spanked his monkey.
223
00:11:07,067 --> 00:11:09,436
Yeah.
224
00:11:10,638 --> 00:11:12,872
She had an even hotter friend
225
00:11:12,873 --> 00:11:15,142
named Zoing-oing-oing-oing.
226
00:11:15,242 --> 00:11:17,978
Lumbass took one look
at her and said,
227
00:11:18,078 --> 00:11:21,281
"Boing-oing-oing-oing."
228
00:11:23,283 --> 00:11:24,785
And there was
this other hot chick
229
00:11:24,885 --> 00:11:26,453
whose name was Jutt-Head.
230
00:11:26,553 --> 00:11:28,387
And she was like,
"I want to score
231
00:11:28,388 --> 00:11:32,025
with Butt-Head."
232
00:11:33,794 --> 00:11:36,695
She lived in a town
called Shmeavis Blucks.
233
00:11:36,696 --> 00:11:38,298
Yeah, that's a cool name.
234
00:11:38,399 --> 00:11:42,135
Where everyone liked to say,
235
00:11:42,235 --> 00:11:44,937
"Beavis sucks."
Hey. Wait a second.
236
00:11:44,938 --> 00:11:46,706
Who wrote this?
237
00:11:46,707 --> 00:11:48,374
What happened
to the part about me
238
00:11:48,375 --> 00:11:50,309
scoring and drinking gleers?
239
00:11:50,310 --> 00:11:53,546
Uh, what are gleers?
240
00:11:53,547 --> 00:11:54,914
They get you drunker
than beers.
241
00:11:54,915 --> 00:11:57,116
You have to leave.
242
00:11:57,117 --> 00:11:59,118
You can't keep
coming back in here.
243
00:11:59,119 --> 00:12:01,754
Uh, can we at least
use the computer
244
00:12:01,755 --> 00:12:03,722
to look at some websites?
245
00:12:03,723 --> 00:12:05,225
Yeah.
246
00:12:05,325 --> 00:12:07,694
- Get out.
- This sucks.
247
00:12:09,163 --> 00:12:11,065
Yeah, my tax dollars
pay for this library!
248
00:12:12,633 --> 00:12:15,335
Uh, we don't pay taxes.
249
00:12:15,336 --> 00:12:16,502
Oh, yeah, yeah.
250
00:12:16,503 --> 00:12:18,839
Well, we get taxes
or something.
17501
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