Original subtitles

♪ MTV ♪

You two are idiots, so I'm gonna do the whole group

science project by myself.

You just stand there and do nothing.

Uh, OK.

Yeah, nothing is cool. Yeah.

I'm demonstrating the effect of rocket payload

on the trajectory of the--

The rocket is my wiener.

Never mind.

I'm gonna put the model rocket engine in.

And then I attach these wires,

and then I press the button to launch.

Yeah, and then there's fire.

Yeah.

Wait.

I have to go inside to get my scientific calculator.

Don't touch anything,

especially the rocket engine.

It could explode and blow your fingers off.

Let's launch my butt.

Yeah.

We're gonna science.

Here we go.

Just tape that on there.

I'll just attach the wires and press the button.

Oh, yeah.

My butt's going to space.

It didn't launch, Butt-Head.

Maybe we need to tape it to my schlong.

Oh, yeah.

That's a good idea.

Yeah.

Yeah, it's gonna be cool.

Damn it.

This sucks.

I think this thing is broken or something.

Doesn't sound like it's broken.

I wonder why it didn't blow off my schl--

Whoa!

Did you hear that?

Something sounded cool.

Uh, Beavis,

your ear blew off.

What?

I said, your ear blew off.

What?

I said, your ear blew off.

Sorry, Butt-Head, I can't hear you.

My ear blew off.

Science is cool.

What's that?

"Meet the man behind the dolls."

And that's--that's kind of me.

But Barbie somehow has stayed relevant.

So are all the Barbies named Barbie?

'Cause they're like--they're all different people and stuff.

I don't understand.

Uh,

yeah, there's, like, lawyer Barbie

and Wet n Wild Barbie

and President Barbie.

Yeah, but, um-- but they're all named Barbie?

Uh, yeah.

They should make a "Your Mom" Barbie,

and she just lays around on the couch all day

with a line of Kens outside her Dreamhouse.

Shut up, Butt-Head. Come on.

Yeah, that'd be cool, though.

There'd be a lot of people in her box,

if you know what I mean.

Shut up, Butt-Head.

I think that collecting, right, it's not about amassing.

Your mom is a collector.

She collects wieners.

Shut up, Butt-Head.

And the "Your Mom" Barbies are not in mint condition.

Come on. That's enough.

It can be found used

at every Saturday morning yard sale.

Laying around, hungover,

no idea where they are.

Enough, Butt-Head. Come on.

You know what I always wondered, Butt-Head?

Does the Wicked Witch of the West have green boobs?

Don't change the subject, Beavis.

All the Kens would be like, "Hello, Beavis.

I'm Ken, your new stepdad."

You could have dozens of different men

to abandon you.

The Beavis's mom Barbie Dreamhouse

is just like a mattress and a bottle of tequila.

Damn it, Butt-Head.

I'm gonna kick your ass.

With Beavis's Mom Barbie, all sales are final.

Damn it, Butt-Head.

You know, 'cause dudes would just wanna, like,

use her and return her.

Damn it, Butt-Head!

I'm gonna kick your ass!

Uh, just one more.

Shut up, Butt-Head!

Damn it, Beavis!

The Beavis's Mom Barbie--

Is only $30...

For a half hour.

I'm gonna kill you, Butt-Head!

Uh, where'd your ear go, dumbass?

Never mind that, Butt-Head!

Where did my ear go?

It's gotta be somewhere.

Whoa, here it is.

I found it.

Whoa!

That explosion really messed it up.

Yeah.

Your ear is disgusting now.

You know, um, I see a lot of ears like this in the woods.

That's 'cause there's a lot of dumbasses in the woods

blowing their ears off.

Hey, you said "blowing off."

Go ahead, and--

There you go, Beavis.

Good as new.

You know, I think I can actually hear better now!

- OK. - What?

Talk into my good ear!

Damn it! That sucks!

Uh, hmm.

That must not be your ear after all.

Let's keep looking.

Ah, there it is.

Finally!

Whoa.

It's all, like, burnt up.

Cool, yeah.

Hold still.

There you go.

All better.

You guys better not have touched anything.

Nope. Everything's fine.

Nobody blew my ear off and put it back on.

What the hell?

What happened to your ear?

Just a normal ear.

I use it to listen to music, you know, stuff like that.

Uh, Beavis,

I think your ear is, like, a bug or something.

What?

Whoa!

My ear is hauling ass.

We have to find Beavis's ear

and get you out of here before my parents come outside

and freak out. - OK.

You ought to be able to find it, Beavis,

'cause, like, your other senses are enhanced.

Oh, yeah, yeah, that's true.

I should try to spank my monkey.

Don't spank your monkey in my backyard.

I just blew my ear off, dumbass!

What else am I supposed to do?

There it is.

Uh--

oh, yeah.

I'll just go ahead and glue this back on.

Guys, I don't think you can just epoxy it back on.

It needs to be surgically reattached--

All done!

Yeah.

You glued it in the wrong place.

No, I didn't.

Uh--oh, yeah.

So I did.

It's stuck on there pretty good.

Oh, well.

You have to go to the hospital.

Go. Hurry.

Yeah, yeah.

This sucks.

I got an ear on my forehead,

and I gotta walk to the dumbass hospital.

Wait a second, Beavis.

I got a better idea.

Let's blow your ear back off with a rocket engine.

Then we can glue it back on the side of your head or something.

Whoa, good idea, Butt-Head!

What did you do?

Don't worry, Cody.

We blew the ear off again,

and now we can glue it back on in the right place.

And also, we blew the ear off again,

and now we can glue it back on in the right place.

See?

You blew off the wrong ear.

Uh--oh, yeah.

It's on the roof.

Uh, that sucks.

We should throw something at it to knock it down.

We could blow my ear off and throw that.

Oh, good idea.

I'm gonna get a rocket engine.

No, you can't blow your ears off in my backyard anymore.

What? That sucks.

You're a selfish butthole, is what you are.

Get out of here.

Yeah, let's just go home, Butt-Head.

We learned a lesson here today, Beavis.

Cody sucks.

Yeah, and also, you know, we learned a lesson--

that Cody sucks.

Shut up, dumbass.

What?

I said, shut up, dumbass.

- What? - I said, shut up, dumbass.

- What? - I said, shut up, dumbass!

What?

- I said, shut up, dumbass! - What?

Hello.

I'm David van Driessen,

educator and also amateur folk singer.

I'm up here on top of a mountain,

as you can see.

And there's something about that wonderful view

that inspired me to write this song of nature.

OK.

♪ Mountains, they soar above--♪

OK, let me just--

Let me just tune this up here.

This one is in open E, so it's very--

This will just take a second.

I'm sorry. Let me just--

♪ Moun--♪

♪ Mountains ♪

♪ Mountains, mountains ♪

Oh, I see, I need to get it higher, just to--

almost there.

Mm.

♪ Mountains--♪

There, just a little.

♪ Mountains, they soar above--♪

Ah!

Hello?

I was tuning to the wrong octave,

and I snapped a string, which--

oh, no.