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1
00:00:09,183 --> 00:00:10,880
Leaving so soon, cadet?
2
00:00:10,923 --> 00:00:13,230
Sir, by statue 614
of the Alabama Legal Code,
3
00:00:13,274 --> 00:00:16,190
I am officially emancipated
and considered an adult,
4
00:00:16,233 --> 00:00:17,756
an adult who no
longer chooses
5
00:00:17,800 --> 00:00:19,280
to attend Marlin Academy.
6
00:00:19,323 --> 00:00:21,195
I have copies of
the documents here,
7
00:00:21,238 --> 00:00:22,674
if you want to
see them again.
8
00:00:22,718 --> 00:00:24,546
Oh, no need.
9
00:00:24,589 --> 00:00:27,157
I'm sure that everything
was done on the up-and-up.
10
00:00:28,245 --> 00:00:31,335
Let me tell you something,
cadet.
11
00:00:31,379 --> 00:00:34,556
In all my years at this Academy,
12
00:00:34,599 --> 00:00:39,169
I have never had a student
who was more bullheaded,
13
00:00:39,213 --> 00:00:42,477
more committed to avoid
learning at all costs,
14
00:00:42,520 --> 00:00:48,309
a cadet whose constant byword
was "insubordination."
15
00:00:48,352 --> 00:00:51,660
Thank you, cadet.
16
00:00:51,703 --> 00:00:53,096
What?
17
00:00:53,140 --> 00:00:55,925
Before you came to this academy,
18
00:00:55,968 --> 00:01:00,538
I was bored, uninspired
and this close to retiring,
19
00:01:00,582 --> 00:01:03,237
but your insolence and stupidity
20
00:01:03,280 --> 00:01:05,239
have been the irritating
grain of sand
21
00:01:05,282 --> 00:01:09,765
around which has formed
the pearl of my renaissance.
22
00:01:09,808 --> 00:01:12,376
I like me again.
23
00:01:12,420 --> 00:01:13,943
Cadet!
24
00:01:16,424 --> 00:01:20,863
As a thanks,
I want you to have this.
25
00:01:24,171 --> 00:01:26,347
Normally, these are reserved
26
00:01:26,390 --> 00:01:27,739
for cadets who have
distinguished themselves,
27
00:01:27,783 --> 00:01:30,525
or whose parents have
donated a building,
28
00:01:30,568 --> 00:01:33,136
but you've left your mark here
in your own way,
29
00:01:33,180 --> 00:01:35,486
so what the heck?
30
00:01:35,530 --> 00:01:39,142
Wow. Sir, this is great.
31
00:01:39,186 --> 00:01:40,796
Farewell, cadet.
32
00:01:40,839 --> 00:01:43,277
Thank you so much.
Now,
33
00:01:43,320 --> 00:01:44,452
careful, that's razor...
34
00:01:47,890 --> 00:01:50,327
[bell dings]
35
00:01:54,375 --> 00:01:56,159
[sighs]
36
00:01:56,203 --> 00:01:59,554
♪ Yes, no, maybe
37
00:01:59,597 --> 00:02:02,296
♪ I don't know
38
00:02:02,339 --> 00:02:05,429
♪ Can you repeat the question?
39
00:02:05,473 --> 00:02:07,823
♪ You're not the boss
of me now ♪
40
00:02:07,866 --> 00:02:10,259
♪ You're not
the boss of me now ♪
41
00:02:10,304 --> 00:02:12,567
♪ You're not the boss
of me now ♪
42
00:02:12,610 --> 00:02:14,656
♪ And you're not so big
43
00:02:14,699 --> 00:02:17,049
♪ You're not the boss
of me now ♪
44
00:02:17,093 --> 00:02:19,313
♪ You're not
the boss of me now ♪
45
00:02:19,356 --> 00:02:21,576
♪ You're not the boss
of me now ♪
46
00:02:21,619 --> 00:02:24,361
♪ And you're not so big
47
00:02:24,405 --> 00:02:29,192
♪ Life is unfair.
48
00:02:29,236 --> 00:02:32,413
Normally, I dread
the first day of school.
49
00:02:32,456 --> 00:02:34,241
My mom's been on such a rampage
about Francis,
50
00:02:34,284 --> 00:02:36,808
it's actually a relief
to get out of the house.
51
00:02:36,852 --> 00:02:38,288
Thank God!
52
00:02:38,332 --> 00:02:41,073
Summer's over.
53
00:02:41,117 --> 00:02:42,466
REESE:
Hello, babies.
54
00:02:42,510 --> 00:02:44,381
How's baby school,
babies?
55
00:02:44,425 --> 00:02:46,818
Didn't high school start,
like, a half hour ago?
56
00:02:46,862 --> 00:02:48,211
Hey, if I'm on time today
57
00:02:48,255 --> 00:02:49,908
they're going to expect it
every day.
58
00:02:49,952 --> 00:02:52,215
Ow! Ow! Ow!
59
00:02:52,259 --> 00:02:54,217
Hi, Reese.
This is Gus.
60
00:02:54,261 --> 00:02:55,871
He's in the lead
61
00:02:55,914 --> 00:02:58,656
to replace you
as school bully.
62
00:02:58,700 --> 00:03:00,919
He gives a wedgie
that'll knock
your socks off.
63
00:03:00,963 --> 00:03:02,094
I'm not just
saying that
64
00:03:02,138 --> 00:03:03,618
'cause he's got
me in a headlock.
65
00:03:03,661 --> 00:03:05,794
If you grab your wrist
instead of your fingers,
66
00:03:05,837 --> 00:03:07,099
you'll get better leverage.
67
00:03:07,143 --> 00:03:09,450
You listen to him.
He's the man.
68
00:03:09,493 --> 00:03:11,103
[grunts]
69
00:03:13,976 --> 00:03:15,847
I've completed the research
on our new teacher,
70
00:03:15,891 --> 00:03:17,458
if anyone's interested.
71
00:03:19,329 --> 00:03:23,290
Lionel Herkabe,
born July 8, 1963.
72
00:03:23,333 --> 00:03:25,074
Parents-- John and Ida.
73
00:03:25,117 --> 00:03:26,815
Notice anything?
74
00:03:26,858 --> 00:03:28,860
He was a Krelboyne.
75
00:03:28,904 --> 00:03:30,471
We won't have
to talk down to him.
76
00:03:30,514 --> 00:03:33,735
Finally, someone
who knows our pain.
77
00:03:33,778 --> 00:03:36,651
"Bentley Gifted High,
Princeton, Harvard Business."
78
00:03:36,694 --> 00:03:38,261
What's this guy
doing teaching?
79
00:03:38,305 --> 00:03:40,481
Well, there was
some unpleasantness.
80
00:03:40,524 --> 00:03:44,485
He quit a government think tank
to start a dot-com.
81
00:03:44,528 --> 00:03:46,704
[all groan][whistles]
82
00:03:46,748 --> 00:03:49,141
One-time net worth $200 million,
83
00:03:49,185 --> 00:03:50,882
Now $137.
84
00:03:50,926 --> 00:03:52,971
[gasping]
85
00:03:53,015 --> 00:03:55,539
Here he comes! Here he comes!
86
00:03:55,583 --> 00:03:57,672
Hurry up.
87
00:03:57,715 --> 00:03:59,282
Get out of my way.
88
00:04:23,828 --> 00:04:25,308
Who's Dabney?
89
00:04:25,352 --> 00:04:26,527
That's me, sir.
90
00:04:26,570 --> 00:04:29,007
I took the liberty of ordering
you a decaf soy latte.
91
00:04:29,051 --> 00:04:31,183
Let me guess.
92
00:04:31,227 --> 00:04:34,665
Emotionally needy,
closet bed-wetter...
93
00:04:34,709 --> 00:04:37,494
you get no affection at home
so you'll be seeking it from me.
94
00:04:37,538 --> 00:04:39,627
Look elsewhere, son.
95
00:04:41,063 --> 00:04:43,457
Who's the anal-retentive
outsider?
96
00:04:44,414 --> 00:04:48,418
With repressed matricidal
tendencies?
97
00:04:48,462 --> 00:04:51,073
It was from me, sir!
Please, stop.
98
00:04:52,640 --> 00:04:54,119
As you may or may not know,
99
00:04:54,163 --> 00:04:56,470
I was once one of you...
a Krelboyne,
100
00:04:56,513 --> 00:04:58,167
and I'm sure I would have made
the same
101
00:04:58,210 --> 00:05:00,212
lame attempt
to ingratiate myself
102
00:05:00,256 --> 00:05:03,259
to the new, soft-headed thickwit
teaching my class.
103
00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:04,913
Oh, yes,
I've been there.
104
00:05:04,956 --> 00:05:07,437
I have been coddled and preened.
105
00:05:07,481 --> 00:05:09,918
"Oh, you're a genius.
You can do anything
106
00:05:09,961 --> 00:05:11,049
"you set your mind to.
107
00:05:11,093 --> 00:05:14,009
It must be so easy being you."
108
00:05:14,052 --> 00:05:14,966
Well, bull ...!
109
00:05:15,010 --> 00:05:16,751
[all gasp]
110
00:05:16,794 --> 00:05:20,581
All that gets you is an ex-wife
and $14 million in debt.
111
00:05:20,624 --> 00:05:22,713
Now I refuse to let you fall
into the trap
112
00:05:22,757 --> 00:05:23,932
society has set for you.
113
00:05:23,975 --> 00:05:25,803
Playtime is over children.
114
00:05:25,847 --> 00:05:28,066
You've had a free ride so far.
115
00:05:28,110 --> 00:05:30,808
It's about time somebody
motivated you, challenged you,
116
00:05:30,852 --> 00:05:32,941
tested your mental limits.
117
00:05:32,984 --> 00:05:34,029
Granted, I don't have
118
00:05:34,072 --> 00:05:35,378
a teaching certificate
119
00:05:35,422 --> 00:05:36,640
from a two-year
community college
120
00:05:36,684 --> 00:05:39,077
like most of the people
I was forced to say hello to
121
00:05:39,121 --> 00:05:40,818
this morning
in the teachers lounge,
122
00:05:40,862 --> 00:05:43,430
but, you know, I'm just going
to try to muddle through
123
00:05:43,473 --> 00:05:46,041
with my double doctorate
from Harvard.
124
00:05:46,084 --> 00:05:48,217
This is a test.
125
00:05:48,260 --> 00:05:49,653
Correct. You have 20 minutes.
126
00:05:49,697 --> 00:05:51,655
There are six
essay questions.
127
00:05:51,699 --> 00:05:54,658
I'm sorry. I thought this was
the gifted class.
128
00:05:54,702 --> 00:05:55,877
Begin!
129
00:06:09,151 --> 00:06:10,674
Thanks for the ride.
130
00:06:10,718 --> 00:06:12,807
Are you sure
about this Alaska thing?
131
00:06:12,850 --> 00:06:14,025
Oh, absolutely.
132
00:06:14,069 --> 00:06:15,070
I don't know.
133
00:06:15,113 --> 00:06:16,550
I heard Alaska's supposed
to be a hole.
134
00:06:16,593 --> 00:06:17,594
Are you kidding?
135
00:06:17,638 --> 00:06:19,248
Cruise ships go up there.
136
00:06:19,291 --> 00:06:21,076
Only for about six weeks
in the summer.
137
00:06:21,119 --> 00:06:22,773
Isn't it dark there
the rest of the year?
138
00:06:22,817 --> 00:06:25,472
I don't have to justify
myself to you.
139
00:06:25,515 --> 00:06:27,778
I don't have to justify
myself to anyone.
140
00:06:27,822 --> 00:06:29,476
That's why
I got emancipated, okay?
141
00:06:29,519 --> 00:06:31,129
Okay.
142
00:06:31,173 --> 00:06:33,349
Good luck with your parents.
143
00:06:33,393 --> 00:06:35,090
Yeah, well, they had
a week to think about it.
144
00:06:35,133 --> 00:06:36,352
We'll see how they take it.
145
00:06:37,614 --> 00:06:39,877
[growling]
146
00:06:41,313 --> 00:06:42,576
[shrieks]
147
00:06:42,619 --> 00:06:44,447
You...!
148
00:06:44,491 --> 00:06:48,712
[screaming][growling]
149
00:06:48,756 --> 00:06:50,366
You ungrateful
son of a...!
150
00:06:54,152 --> 00:06:55,893
This wasn't meant
to hurt you!
151
00:06:55,937 --> 00:06:58,374
After all we've done!
152
00:07:05,425 --> 00:07:07,078
[screams]
153
00:07:13,868 --> 00:07:16,348
All I'm saying
is that you can get
your diploma first
154
00:07:16,392 --> 00:07:17,741
and then do
what you want.
155
00:07:17,785 --> 00:07:20,527
It's all about maximizing
your options,
156
00:07:20,570 --> 00:07:22,703
taking the long view.
157
00:07:22,746 --> 00:07:25,053
Sorry about using
"The Closer."
158
00:07:25,096 --> 00:07:26,097
Nonsense.
159
00:07:26,141 --> 00:07:27,621
I wouldn't have
taught it to you
160
00:07:27,664 --> 00:07:28,839
if I didn't want
you to use it.
161
00:07:28,883 --> 00:07:30,188
Listen, what do
I always say?
162
00:07:30,232 --> 00:07:31,189
"The nards
are fair game."
163
00:07:31,233 --> 00:07:34,410
The nards are fair game.
164
00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:35,890
Look, sometimes
you're presented
165
00:07:35,933 --> 00:07:37,544
with an opportunity
that you just can't pass up.
166
00:07:37,587 --> 00:07:39,546
I hope you understand.
167
00:07:39,589 --> 00:07:40,677
I'm not the one you
have to worry about.
168
00:07:40,721 --> 00:07:42,070
I know. And I want
169
00:07:42,113 --> 00:07:43,375
to get this straight
with Mom.
170
00:07:43,419 --> 00:07:45,160
That's why I came here.
171
00:07:45,203 --> 00:07:46,509
Okay then.
172
00:07:46,553 --> 00:07:47,684
Honey?
173
00:07:49,381 --> 00:07:52,341
Um, your son has something
to say to you.
174
00:07:54,778 --> 00:07:55,779
Huh? I didn't know
175
00:07:55,823 --> 00:07:57,607
the Hendersons painted
their house.
176
00:08:04,353 --> 00:08:06,573
[bell ringing]
177
00:08:09,227 --> 00:08:11,665
Well, I have your test results.
178
00:08:11,708 --> 00:08:12,796
You all got As.
179
00:08:14,711 --> 00:08:16,974
But, since this is
the giftedclass,
180
00:08:17,018 --> 00:08:20,108
I also factored in
cogency of argument,
181
00:08:20,151 --> 00:08:21,675
economy of language
182
00:08:21,718 --> 00:08:25,417
and penmanship,
which enabled me to do this.
183
00:08:26,723 --> 00:08:27,550
What is that?
184
00:08:27,594 --> 00:08:28,812
A ranking board.
185
00:08:28,856 --> 00:08:30,597
But I thought you said
we all got As.
186
00:08:30,640 --> 00:08:31,554
Oh, you did.
187
00:08:31,598 --> 00:08:34,601
But some of you got better As
than others.
188
00:08:34,644 --> 00:08:36,645
But we all still have As?
189
00:08:36,690 --> 00:08:38,561
Of course.
190
00:08:38,605 --> 00:08:40,171
So, what does
being number one get you?
191
00:08:40,215 --> 00:08:41,695
Nothing.
192
00:08:41,738 --> 00:08:44,001
Just the knowledge that you...
193
00:08:44,044 --> 00:08:45,699
are number one.
194
00:08:45,742 --> 00:08:47,483
Or that you are not...
195
00:08:47,527 --> 00:08:48,745
number one.
196
00:08:50,747 --> 00:08:51,792
Yes, Number Five.
197
00:08:51,835 --> 00:08:53,358
It's Dabney, sir.
198
00:08:53,402 --> 00:08:54,795
I know.
What is it, Number Five?
199
00:08:54,838 --> 00:08:56,840
I forgot.
200
00:08:59,539 --> 00:09:02,411
What... a jerk.
201
00:09:02,454 --> 00:09:04,239
Is that what we're
going to turn out like?
202
00:09:04,282 --> 00:09:06,154
If I ever start
acting like that,
203
00:09:06,197 --> 00:09:07,982
you have to promise
to kill me.
204
00:09:08,025 --> 00:09:10,158
No, no more death pacts.
205
00:09:10,201 --> 00:09:11,725
Don't worry about it.
206
00:09:11,768 --> 00:09:12,987
The only way
that stupid board
207
00:09:13,030 --> 00:09:15,032
can have an effect
on us is if we let it.
208
00:09:15,076 --> 00:09:16,512
Those numbers mean nothing.
209
00:09:18,732 --> 00:09:19,776
What are...
210
00:09:19,820 --> 00:09:20,995
you doing?
211
00:09:21,038 --> 00:09:22,649
Nothing.
212
00:09:22,692 --> 00:09:24,302
You were studying?
213
00:09:24,346 --> 00:09:25,477
No, I wasn't.
214
00:09:25,521 --> 00:09:28,132
My book just fell open
to this page.
215
00:09:29,351 --> 00:09:32,833
You know,
I'm really not hungry.
216
00:09:32,876 --> 00:09:36,314
I think I left
my recess stuff in my locker.
217
00:09:39,056 --> 00:09:40,971
Oh, my God,
high school is awesome.
218
00:09:41,015 --> 00:09:43,626
They have an entire room
just for detention.
219
00:09:43,670 --> 00:09:45,628
They put you in
with juniors and seniors.
220
00:09:45,672 --> 00:09:47,325
Some of them have records.
221
00:09:47,369 --> 00:09:49,501
It's really inspiring.
222
00:09:49,545 --> 00:09:51,503
What are you looking at?
223
00:09:51,547 --> 00:09:52,679
Francis.
224
00:09:52,722 --> 00:09:54,855
He's still out there?
225
00:09:54,898 --> 00:09:56,770
Yeah, he's eating
out of the bird feeder.
226
00:09:56,813 --> 00:09:58,293
LOIS:
Whose shoes are these?
227
00:09:58,336 --> 00:10:00,861
Who left their shoes
in the living room?
228
00:10:00,904 --> 00:10:02,253
Those are mine-- I'm sorry.
229
00:10:02,297 --> 00:10:03,559
You're right
you're sorry.
230
00:10:03,603 --> 00:10:04,647
Leaving your shoes around
like you,
231
00:10:04,691 --> 00:10:06,910
like you don't even
care about them.
232
00:10:06,954 --> 00:10:09,086
I hope you like walking
to school in your socks!
233
00:10:09,130 --> 00:10:10,914
I said I'm sorry.
234
00:10:10,958 --> 00:10:12,524
Well, I've heard sorry before.
235
00:10:12,568 --> 00:10:13,830
I don't think so.
236
00:10:13,874 --> 00:10:16,877
Okay, tell you
what we're going to do.
237
00:10:16,920 --> 00:10:18,705
From now on,
238
00:10:18,748 --> 00:10:20,315
when you want
to wear shoes,
239
00:10:20,358 --> 00:10:21,664
you check them out.
240
00:10:21,708 --> 00:10:23,361
Sign them in,
sign them out.
241
00:10:23,405 --> 00:10:25,625
Just like a library.
242
00:10:28,062 --> 00:10:29,759
Clean up those toys!
243
00:10:31,587 --> 00:10:33,720
[knocking]
244
00:10:44,339 --> 00:10:45,470
Oh, thanks.
245
00:10:45,514 --> 00:10:46,907
It is freezing out there.
246
00:10:46,950 --> 00:10:47,734
Hey, it's good
to see you guys.
247
00:10:47,777 --> 00:10:48,909
I really missed you.
248
00:10:48,952 --> 00:10:50,040
[grunts]
249
00:10:50,084 --> 00:10:51,912
What was that for?
250
00:10:51,955 --> 00:10:53,130
Emancipation?
251
00:10:53,174 --> 00:10:55,176
What, you're divorcing
the family now?
252
00:10:55,219 --> 00:10:56,960
How could you do this to Mom?
253
00:10:57,004 --> 00:10:59,528
She left me no choice.
254
00:10:59,571 --> 00:11:00,834
Ow!
255
00:11:00,877 --> 00:11:02,705
We've done a lot
of bad things to Mom,
256
00:11:02,749 --> 00:11:04,576
but we would never abandon her.
257
00:11:04,620 --> 00:11:05,926
I'm not abandoning her.
258
00:11:05,969 --> 00:11:07,754
I'm just going to Alaska.
259
00:11:07,797 --> 00:11:09,538
That's 5,000 miles away.
260
00:11:09,581 --> 00:11:10,931
It is not...
261
00:11:10,974 --> 00:11:12,106
5,000 miles,
are you serious?
262
00:11:12,149 --> 00:11:13,803
Oh, my God, it's going
263
00:11:13,847 --> 00:11:15,587
to take me forever
to get up there.
264
00:11:15,631 --> 00:11:16,806
Then don't go.
265
00:11:16,850 --> 00:11:18,112
Guys, you have to understand.
266
00:11:18,155 --> 00:11:19,896
I'm not doing this
to hurt anybody.
267
00:11:19,940 --> 00:11:21,637
I just... I really think
268
00:11:21,681 --> 00:11:24,161
this is my best chance
to make something of myself.
269
00:11:24,205 --> 00:11:25,380
Tell it to Mom.
270
00:11:25,423 --> 00:11:27,208
I can't, she
won't talk to me.
271
00:11:27,251 --> 00:11:28,775
She is being
so immature.
272
00:11:28,818 --> 00:11:32,387
In the meantime, I'm stuck
outside in the freezing cold.
273
00:11:34,041 --> 00:11:35,782
Would it be all right
if I slept in here tonight?
274
00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:41,744
Certainly, the whale
275
00:11:41,788 --> 00:11:44,138
represents
the search for God...
276
00:11:44,181 --> 00:11:45,792
but that could be limiting.
277
00:11:45,835 --> 00:11:47,315
We could say it was
278
00:11:47,358 --> 00:11:48,969
the search
for the self.
279
00:11:49,012 --> 00:11:49,926
Melville could be
280
00:11:49,970 --> 00:11:51,928
considered a pre-existentialist.
281
00:11:55,062 --> 00:11:55,976
But you can't deny
282
00:11:56,019 --> 00:11:58,239
that the whale could also
be the search for truth
283
00:11:58,282 --> 00:12:00,023
which has been
a theme throughout
284
00:12:00,067 --> 00:12:00,807
his whole oeuvre.
285
00:12:05,637 --> 00:12:09,990
But we can't overlook the fact
that it is an actual whale,
286
00:12:10,033 --> 00:12:12,427
which was the
biggest industry
in the 19th century.
287
00:12:12,470 --> 00:12:13,820
The oil was
used in lamps,
288
00:12:13,863 --> 00:12:15,865
soaps and even cosmetics.
289
00:12:18,825 --> 00:12:22,916
Today, whaling is outlawed,
but many Aleutian islanders
290
00:12:22,959 --> 00:12:27,007
are legally allowed
to harvest whales
291
00:12:27,050 --> 00:12:29,270
for ritual purposes.
292
00:12:29,966 --> 00:12:32,447
But I digress!
293
00:12:32,490 --> 00:12:34,405
[whimpering]
294
00:12:34,449 --> 00:12:38,018
Wow, nine places.
295
00:12:38,061 --> 00:12:39,628
That's got to be a record.
296
00:12:41,064 --> 00:12:43,066
Okay, on to new business.
297
00:12:43,110 --> 00:12:45,460
This Friday,
Principal Littledove
298
00:12:45,503 --> 00:12:47,941
will be dropping by
for a little evaluation.
299
00:12:47,984 --> 00:12:50,378
I think he'll be very impressed
with what he sees.
300
00:12:50,421 --> 00:12:52,946
I don't think
he'll understand it,
301
00:12:52,989 --> 00:12:55,035
but I think his tiny brain
302
00:12:55,078 --> 00:12:57,820
will have the dim perception
of the progress you can make
303
00:12:57,864 --> 00:13:01,824
when students
are properly motivated.
304
00:13:01,868 --> 00:13:03,913
Now, who would like
to sink their teeth
305
00:13:03,957 --> 00:13:05,262
into some
Bernoulli equations?
306
00:13:10,006 --> 00:13:11,268
Come on, guys.
307
00:13:11,312 --> 00:13:12,443
Look at yourselves.
308
00:13:12,487 --> 00:13:13,749
If we don't let those
309
00:13:13,793 --> 00:13:15,707
stupid rankings get to us,
they mean nothing.
310
00:13:15,751 --> 00:13:18,188
Easy for you
to say, Number One.
311
00:13:18,232 --> 00:13:19,494
I have a name.
312
00:13:19,537 --> 00:13:21,104
We all have names!
313
00:13:21,148 --> 00:13:23,977
Oh, my God,
I can't remember mine!
314
00:13:24,020 --> 00:13:25,587
MALCOLM:
This is ridiculous!
315
00:13:25,630 --> 00:13:28,416
School used to be the one place
where you were truly happy,
316
00:13:28,459 --> 00:13:30,374
and Herkabe has taken that
away from you.
317
00:13:31,071 --> 00:13:32,202
That stupid board
318
00:13:32,246 --> 00:13:33,203
is ruining our lives.
319
00:13:33,247 --> 00:13:34,422
We can't let him do that.
320
00:13:34,465 --> 00:13:37,338
What choice... do we have?
321
00:13:37,381 --> 00:13:39,906
We have the choice that
people have had for centuries.
322
00:13:39,949 --> 00:13:42,212
We can choose to fail.
323
00:13:42,256 --> 00:13:43,866
Like the French?
324
00:13:43,910 --> 00:13:47,914
You mean... we tank...
today's test?
325
00:13:47,957 --> 00:13:50,046
No, we don't tank it.
326
00:13:50,090 --> 00:13:51,787
We nuke it.
327
00:13:52,701 --> 00:13:54,268
Every answer wrong.
328
00:13:54,311 --> 00:13:55,965
No complete sentences.
329
00:13:56,009 --> 00:13:57,880
No punctuation.
330
00:13:57,924 --> 00:14:00,883
And we use number three pencils.
331
00:14:00,927 --> 00:14:01,710
[gasping]
332
00:14:01,753 --> 00:14:03,016
You can't rank zeros!
333
00:14:03,059 --> 00:14:04,147
That's brilliant!
334
00:14:04,191 --> 00:14:05,235
He'll have no choice
335
00:14:05,279 --> 00:14:07,107
but to throw out
his stupid system!
336
00:14:07,150 --> 00:14:09,022
We'll be free!
337
00:14:09,065 --> 00:14:11,415
[cheering]
338
00:14:15,724 --> 00:14:18,118
I'm very disappointed in you.
339
00:14:18,161 --> 00:14:20,772
Everyone else, nice job.
340
00:14:35,875 --> 00:14:37,050
[softly]:
I'm sorry.
341
00:14:37,093 --> 00:14:39,182
[softly]:
I'm sorry.
342
00:14:39,226 --> 00:14:40,314
I tried.
343
00:14:40,357 --> 00:14:42,359
My hand wouldn't let me.
344
00:14:42,403 --> 00:14:45,536
I regret...
345
00:14:45,580 --> 00:14:47,016
nothing.
346
00:14:47,060 --> 00:14:49,018
Interesting gambit, but I guess
347
00:14:49,062 --> 00:14:51,934
the Lemmings didn't follow you
off the cliff.
348
00:14:51,978 --> 00:14:54,154
When you've spent some time
in the real world,
349
00:14:54,197 --> 00:14:57,984
you'll realize you can't fight
the system, and now...
350
00:14:58,027 --> 00:14:59,681
I'mthe system.
351
00:15:12,041 --> 00:15:13,173
[exasperated sigh]
352
00:15:15,871 --> 00:15:17,786
Don't worry,
I just let the air out.
353
00:15:17,829 --> 00:15:20,049
We can talk
while I put on your spare.
354
00:15:20,093 --> 00:15:22,008
Look, I'm sorry I had
to resort to this,
355
00:15:22,051 --> 00:15:25,359
but you have to give me
five minutes so we can talk.
356
00:15:25,402 --> 00:15:26,360
[engine starts]
357
00:15:26,403 --> 00:15:27,317
[music blaring]
358
00:15:27,361 --> 00:15:29,580
[yelling]:
I can talk over the music!
359
00:15:31,060 --> 00:15:32,801
You can't drive on a flat!
360
00:15:34,150 --> 00:15:36,283
You're going to ruin your rims!
361
00:15:39,286 --> 00:15:40,417
[tires squealing]
362
00:15:40,461 --> 00:15:42,637
That was a red light!
363
00:15:43,943 --> 00:15:45,640
You might want to notice
364
00:15:45,683 --> 00:15:48,991
my entire opening paragraph
is a palindrome.
365
00:15:49,035 --> 00:15:50,993
You might want to notice...
366
00:15:51,037 --> 00:15:53,126
my formatting.
367
00:15:57,739 --> 00:15:59,132
What's this?
368
00:15:59,175 --> 00:16:01,656
A study of irrigation techniques
of pre-Roman society and how
369
00:16:01,699 --> 00:16:04,006
they led to the advancement
of Western civilization.
370
00:16:04,050 --> 00:16:07,227
I thought we were just studying
Mesopotamian farming techniques.
371
00:16:07,270 --> 00:16:08,228
We were.
372
00:16:08,271 --> 00:16:10,012
I just used that as
a jumping-off point.
373
00:16:10,056 --> 00:16:12,710
I saw how their influences
spread through the Egyptians,
374
00:16:12,754 --> 00:16:15,931
the Carthaginians, basically
through the whole ancient world.
375
00:16:15,975 --> 00:16:18,064
I think you'll be very happy
with this paper.
376
00:16:18,107 --> 00:16:20,588
Very nice, Number Twelve.
377
00:16:20,631 --> 00:16:24,200
It's nice to see
a little effort put forth
378
00:16:24,244 --> 00:16:29,118
while some are content
to do the absolute minimum.
379
00:16:30,728 --> 00:16:35,255
So... he wants... to play.
380
00:16:35,298 --> 00:16:37,605
Oh, we'll play all right.
381
00:16:37,648 --> 00:16:40,042
What is it we're playing?
382
00:16:40,086 --> 00:16:44,003
♪
383
00:17:11,204 --> 00:17:14,381
♪
384
00:17:43,062 --> 00:17:44,367
Okay, I think
we're ready
385
00:17:44,411 --> 00:17:46,152
to show Principal
Littledove
386
00:17:46,195 --> 00:17:49,372
what the right kind
of motivation
can accomplish.
387
00:17:49,416 --> 00:17:51,766
Well done, class.
388
00:17:56,205 --> 00:18:00,035
You know, maybe we should
just put our heads down
389
00:18:00,079 --> 00:18:03,082
and take a rest
for a moment, shall we?
390
00:18:07,173 --> 00:18:09,000
Yes, One-to-the-Eleventh?
391
00:18:09,044 --> 00:18:11,394
Did you know I can count
to a million by prime numbers?
392
00:18:11,438 --> 00:18:12,917
I can, too!
393
00:18:12,961 --> 00:18:15,137
So can I! It's easy.
394
00:18:15,181 --> 00:18:16,399
That's not necessary.
395
00:18:16,443 --> 00:18:19,794
2, 3, 5, 7, 11...
396
00:18:19,837 --> 00:18:21,709
13, 17, 19...
397
00:18:21,752 --> 00:18:23,928
[frantically]:
23, 29, 31.
398
00:18:23,972 --> 00:18:25,713
Now by hundreds!
399
00:18:25,756 --> 00:18:31,197
101, 211, 307, 401, 503, 601...
400
00:18:31,240 --> 00:18:32,198
DABNEY:
7!
401
00:18:32,241 --> 00:18:35,157
7! No!
402
00:18:35,201 --> 00:18:37,377
Okay, that is enough,
One-to-the-Eleventh.
403
00:18:37,420 --> 00:18:39,248
By thousands! 1,009...
404
00:18:39,292 --> 00:18:40,293
2,003...
405
00:18:40,336 --> 00:18:41,163
Now back by hundreds!
406
00:18:41,207 --> 00:18:43,209
2,111, 2,203...
407
00:18:43,252 --> 00:18:44,210
2... 11...
408
00:18:44,253 --> 00:18:46,212
No!
409
00:18:46,255 --> 00:18:47,648
Where are you going,
Number Three?
410
00:18:47,691 --> 00:18:48,866
It's hot.
411
00:18:48,910 --> 00:18:51,826
It's hot and I'm stupid!
412
00:18:51,869 --> 00:18:54,263
I'm stupid, too!
413
00:18:54,307 --> 00:18:55,264
[screaming]
414
00:18:55,308 --> 00:18:57,353
Everybody, please remain seated!
415
00:18:58,093 --> 00:18:59,660
I'm Zero!
416
00:19:00,835 --> 00:19:03,359
Zero-to-the-Zeroth!
417
00:19:03,403 --> 00:19:05,318
[screaming]
418
00:19:06,232 --> 00:19:08,930
[screaming]
419
00:19:15,502 --> 00:19:17,373
I'm nothing!
420
00:19:17,417 --> 00:19:20,333
I'm invisible!
421
00:19:20,376 --> 00:19:21,595
[whistles]
422
00:19:21,638 --> 00:19:24,250
Boy, that's quite a show
for your first week here.
423
00:19:24,293 --> 00:19:27,644
You were right,
you can't beat the system,
424
00:19:27,688 --> 00:19:29,951
but you sure can break it.
425
00:19:33,955 --> 00:19:35,565
I love you guys.
426
00:19:35,609 --> 00:19:38,351
I'll write you
when I get there, okay?
427
00:19:38,394 --> 00:19:40,048
Someday, when
you come back
428
00:19:40,091 --> 00:19:44,313
and you're unemployed
and have no place to live,
429
00:19:44,357 --> 00:19:47,403
you can come stay at my castle.
430
00:19:48,970 --> 00:19:50,972
Thanks, bud.
431
00:19:51,973 --> 00:19:53,279
He's leaving.
432
00:19:53,322 --> 00:19:55,281
He just wants to talk to you.
433
00:19:55,324 --> 00:19:57,283
Just hear him out.
434
00:19:57,326 --> 00:20:00,242
Lois, this... this
has got to stop.
435
00:20:00,286 --> 00:20:02,026
He's going very far away
436
00:20:02,070 --> 00:20:05,204
and you're not
going to see him
for a very long time.
437
00:20:06,770 --> 00:20:09,251
Honey, there are
moments in life
438
00:20:09,295 --> 00:20:13,124
that you just
don't get back,
and I know you.
439
00:20:13,168 --> 00:20:15,475
If you do not deal
with this now,
440
00:20:15,518 --> 00:20:17,781
it will haunt
you forever.
441
00:20:21,307 --> 00:20:22,308
Fine.
442
00:20:22,351 --> 00:20:27,313
I've lost a son
but gained a baby.
443
00:20:30,011 --> 00:20:32,056
I tried.
444
00:20:32,100 --> 00:20:34,320
I know.
445
00:20:40,326 --> 00:20:42,502
Are you sure
this is what you want?
446
00:20:42,545 --> 00:20:45,722
Well, it'd better be.
447
00:20:47,376 --> 00:20:49,030
LOIS:
Francis.
448
00:20:59,954 --> 00:21:01,695
I'm listening.
449
00:21:04,219 --> 00:21:05,438
This is what you get!
450
00:21:05,481 --> 00:21:07,962
This is what you get for
the way you treated me!
451
00:21:08,005 --> 00:21:11,313
I'm going to Alaska
and you're going to
be left without a son!
452
00:21:11,357 --> 00:21:13,315
And the horrible
way you treated me
453
00:21:13,359 --> 00:21:14,795
is now a matter
of public record!
454
00:21:14,838 --> 00:21:16,753
LOIS:
I treated you?!
455
00:21:16,797 --> 00:21:18,929
We've made sacrifice
after sacrifice for you
456
00:21:18,973 --> 00:21:20,583
and you've caused us
nothing but pain!
457
00:21:20,627 --> 00:21:22,585
You want pain?! I've
got your scars, baby!
458
00:21:22,629 --> 00:21:24,195
3h years in that
horrible school...
459
00:21:24,239 --> 00:21:26,023
We went without
for that school!
460
00:21:26,067 --> 00:21:26,981
Oh!
461
00:21:27,024 --> 00:21:28,722
Oh! Maybe I should
thank you!
462
00:21:28,765 --> 00:21:31,942
Thank you, Mother,
for making my life
a living hell!
463
00:21:31,986 --> 00:21:33,248
Living hell?!
You've been nothing
464
00:21:33,292 --> 00:21:35,163
but a problem since
the day you were born.
465
00:21:35,206 --> 00:21:37,208
Your problems are over, lady,
'cause I'm out of here!
29852
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