Original subtitles

How's it going?

This job might do better on the unemployment line.

Yeah, but that ran out.

We might as well just go back to the equity showcases. Could you imagine?

week I only pulled in eight bucks tips.

Yeah, but it's better than not eating.

Oh, better than not eating. I have an idea. Maybe if we incorporate a more

personal tenure with the guests. What do you mean?

What do you mean, what do I mean?

With the guests?

You know what I mean.

No.

Come on.

You've got to give it a try.

You think we can make a lot more money that way?

It's a great idea.

I didn't know anyone was in here. I'm really sorry.

Right. Well, you should put up the Do Not Disturb sign on your door, sir. Oh,

that's okay.

So tell me, how are you up in the world?

I've been staying here for a long time.

You're the first thing I've seen under 100 years old.

Thank you, sir.

Actually, I'm an actress by vocation. I'm just doing this to pick up a few

dollars. Oh, really?

Is that all you do?

Pick up a few extra dollars?

What do you mean by that?

Well, you know, a pretty girl like you might pick up some money in any number

ways. Just what did you have in mind?

Well, uh... You are pretty, aren't you?

I think we can work something out.

Really? You need money for acting lessons and whatnot, right?

Well, yes, I hope so.

I think we could work something out very easily.

Yeah, just buy that.

Yeah, let's get this uniform.

We won't increase it for the next room.

I've never had a job like this before.

This will be terrific for you.

Have enough money to...

Do it your way.

Thank you.

Well, that finally happened.

So what are we going to do about it?

I don't want to go into that.

It's terrific.

Say, listen, what are you doing later on tonight?

Nothing.

Oh, well, I got a client coming over, a very important client.

Why don't you get a girlfriend and come by and we'll have a little party. What

do you think?

Okay, I have someone in mind. Oh, yeah?

Yeah. I'll tell you what, he'll be here in about an hour.

So why don't you come by about 8, 8 o 'clock. Okay, it's a deal.

Okay, very good. I'll see you then. Okay.

I don't know.

I've never had this problem before.

Maybe we're just over -anxious.

Because we're married?

I don't know.

Yeah.

Maybe I need more to drink.

Let me go freshen my drink.

Yes, it is.

Go on about your business.

Aren't you the girl?

Yeah, married today.

Where's your wife?

Wife? In the bedroom.

Well, then, what are you doing out here?

Having a drink.

There's problems.

Is there anything I can do to help?

Sit down.

See, it's like this.

Uh, we've been going together for about five years now. I'm bawling for about

five years.

Nice. Yeah, but we just got married today and, uh, I can't make it.

I don't know what's wrong.

I think I know how you feel.

Maybe if you pretended she wasn't your wife, uh, it would work out better.

Yeah, maybe.

I mean, that sometimes really works.

Yeah?

You mean I could pretend that... You just pretend that she's somebody else.

you won't be so nervous about just being married.

Yeah, maybe.

What should I do?

Who can I pretend?

Well, you could pretend she was me or anybody.

Somebody you really like.

If I was your wife, I don't think you'd have any trouble.

Hmm.

You know, maybe you're right.

I know I am.

Maybe since I'm married to her now that...

I don't have any problems.

oh oh oh

Oh. Oh.

There we go.

Oh, deep.

Pretty deep.

Oh.

Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh.

Hi.

You've changed.

prize for you tonight. I got two beauties coming over.

Your wife is meeting you here tonight?

Well, what time is she coming?

Oh, she's going to the concert first. Well, that's no problem because they're

coming over at eight. So between the time your wife comes over, we'll have

ourselves a nice little party. What do you say?

There's no chance she won't get out till about 11 o 'clock.

That gives us three hours.

Oh, terrific. So you'll be here at eight.

I'll see you then, Smitty. Okay, bye -bye.

I just ran into a really super guy, one of the guests, and I haven't done it so

bad myself.

Oh, really?

Anyway, he's planning a party tonight with a friend of his, a real important

client, and he needs another girl. Are you available?

I can't. I've got to stand in for Susan tonight.

But I have this friend, a really good -looking chick. I think she'd do it, and

think they'd like her.

Yeah, yeah, I'm pretty sure she'd do it. What time do they want her? Eight o

'clock.

That was fantastic.

Mary Ellen.

I mean, Carol.

Carol. Mary Ellen. Carol.

Carol.

Fantastic Carol.

Martin Weinstein? Oh, yes. Come in. Come in. Oh, you must be Sally's friend.

Hey, you're a pervert. Somebody's going to love you. I wouldn't mind getting a

little myself.

Hey, let's go into the bedroom. I have some things I want you to try on.

So listen, can I get you a drink or something?

Yeah, I'll have a shot. As a matter of fact, why don't you just go in here and

change your clothes? What size do you wear? Let me see.

I'm a lingerie salesman, you see. I have a lot of nice things there. Sally's

already inside.

In fact, Smitty will be here any minute. Yeah, go inside, introduce yourself,

and the party will begin any minute now.

Hi.

Hi.

Well, well.

This is Marvin's lingerie.

Oh, yeah, that's...

Well,

goody. I guess I might as well get undressed.

Are you Sally?

No, I'm Mary Ellen.

Sally couldn't come tonight, so I'm filling in.

Are you a friend of Marvin?

Yes. You might say that.

I'm a friend of family.

At any rate...

We'll have a good time, eh?

You know.

Is that an open invitation?

Sure.

To anyone?

Why not?

You play with girls?

Yes, sometimes.

Like now?

Why don't you take them off?

Oh, I'm sorry. I thought this was my suite.

This is your suite.

Hurry up.

Wait a minute. Get up there. Hurry up. Wait a minute.

We're going to all get it up.

Oh, my God.

Wait. What's the matter? Don't you like girls?

I've really never done it before.

Oh, don't be afraid.

It doesn't take much breath. How do you beat your breath?

Right over your head, huh?

Lift up your arms.

Here we go.

Oh, my God.

Wait a minute. I mean, like, you know, like, I just got married the other day.

Really? Yeah.

Well, then you have to learn to be with girls because you might get bored with

your husband.

And if you don't do it with girls, then you just have to do it with boys, so you

might as well do it with girls, right?

Oh, my goodness.

Fresh blood.

Don't bite.

Yeah, but I've never gotten into this whole thing. Yeah, but just pretend I'm

your husband.

That's an idea.

Who the hell is that?

I don't know. That's the outside door. Get the door.

Okay.

See ya.

Oh, excuse me. I'm in the suite next door and I'm looking for my wife. And I

thought I overheard her voice over here. Is she here?

Oh. Shh.

It's my husband.

Uh, no. I don't think so.

But I'll be glad to come with you and help you find her.

Okay? Sure.

Really terrific to see you again, Smitty. So how is business? How is

out there? Really good, really good. I'm glad to hear that. Hey, listen, about

that big order we discussed, you know, I have the stuff all ready to ship.

Now, are you guys... Yeah, yeah, yeah, anything now. Hey, listen, Mark, how

about the broads?

Am I west? I know. They're just in the back changing. I don't know what the

broads are doing.

Let me call him. Hey, girls, what are you doing back there? Come out. Oh, here

they are now. Hey, I want you to meet... Hi, I'm Mary Ann. Hello.

Hello. How do you do?

Well,

let me show you the place, Carol. I'll just leave you two alone to get

acquainted now.

You come here often?

Well, I work here, so... What is it?

Well, really, I'm an actress, but I'm in between jobs.

An actress?

I should have known.

Liquid connections.

Thank you. You're welcome.

What do you do?

Oh, not much.

Listen, you know, I mean, you're very attractive and everything, but who the

hell are you?

Well, I'm Carol. I'm in the next suite.

Oh. Well, who's that woman out there?

Oh, she's Mary Ellen.

Mary Ellen.

That's a very important client I have out there. Listen, I'm sure she'll be

perfect for him. What happened to the girl that was here?

Sally. Where did she go?

I don't know Sally.

Well, what about Sharon? She just came in the door before.

Oh, you mean the girl that was in here before? Right, yeah.

Oh, she had to leave. She had to go someplace.

She's not here yet.

I just don't know where she can be.

I've checked the sauna, the pool room.

You checked the ladies' johns.

Where else could she be?

I don't know, but I'm sure we'll find her. She'll come back to you.

Yeah.

I'm just worried, that's all.

Why don't you, uh, sit over here?

Yeah.

What can we do?

a married man.

So am I.

Married, I mean.

Oh.

Do

you

mind if I call you Mary Ellen?

Why?

Never mind.

Is your prick going to get hard?

Big and fat and hard?

Are you going to fuck me with it?

I'll think about it.

Oh, my God.

you

Oh.

Oh.

Thank you.

Ow. Ow.

Anyway, Smitty, about these orders. I have the stuff packed and ready to ship.

All I need is your okay. What do you say? Why don't you turn into my office?

Oh, Smitty, the office.

Excuse me. Oh, wait a minute. Who are you?

Oh, don't let me interrupt your party. I was just passing through. I was

bringing a blonde lady into the bedroom in there.

Oh, the blonde lady. That's the one I was telling you about.

Carol!

What are you doing here?

Oh, do you know her?

What do you mean, some blonde lady? She's my wife! I was just showing her

of my negligence.

What do you mean, some blonde lady? Oh, that's the blonde lady, man. Forget the

blonde lady. What are you doing here with this party?

I'm not asking you to mess with me.

There's something going on with us, really. Oh, yeah, sure. You just forget

about the lingerie bit. Hey,

no hard feelings now.

Oh, no, she's in there. She's waiting for you. Oh, shit, man.

Who are you again?

Hi there. I'm Smitty.

I'm Trixie.

Trixie, huh?

Yeah. What's the getup here?

Hmm? The getup. What are you dressed like this for?

You look like an Eskimo.

I'm shy.

Oh, you're shy. Well, do you mind if we at least unshoe you?

Okay. Okay.

eat me.

Eat you?

I just ate, but shit, I'm hungry again.

Mmm.

You're good.

You're really good.

Bet your wife appreciates you.

Oh, yes, I do.

Thank you.

Greatest come I've ever had in my life.

I'm glad you enjoyed it, Smitty.

Sharon!

So you're a friend of Sally's, are you? Well, listen, maybe we can do something

with the job in the showroom. Oh, Smitty, how was it, man? Did I tell you

was terrific? This girl is something else, man. Look at the body she's got.

You must have loved it.

Now, about that order, I was thinking with an operation of your size, about

would be appropriate.

Now, have the stuff packed and ready to ship. All I need is your payoff. Marvin,

I don't believe you've met my wife, Sharon.

Oh, your wife? No, how do you... You what?