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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,464 --> 00:00:10,510 Julie, it's 8:44 a.m. on October 16th. 2 00:00:10,593 --> 00:00:13,930 It's been three weeks since the Berenger email leaks started. 3 00:00:14,014 --> 00:00:15,390 Another one hit this morning. 4 00:00:15,473 --> 00:00:18,852 More details on his exorbitant salary. 5 00:00:18,935 --> 00:00:22,981 I have a new theory that feels promising, and I'll report more 6 00:00:23,064 --> 00:00:25,525 when I see you in Berenger's office later. 7 00:00:26,234 --> 00:00:27,360 Nieuwendyk out. 8 00:00:27,444 --> 00:00:29,112 -What did Wheeler find? -I'm sorry? 9 00:00:29,195 --> 00:00:30,280 What did Wheeler find? 10 00:00:30,363 --> 00:00:32,407 -I have no ide... -Wrong! 11 00:00:32,490 --> 00:00:34,492 Ow! 12 00:00:35,243 --> 00:00:36,911 Did anyone see that?! 13 00:00:36,995 --> 00:00:40,123 I'm so sorry. I should've told you about this. 14 00:00:40,206 --> 00:00:44,461 The Gold Rush tradition is you have to answer Wheeler's Riddle, 15 00:00:44,544 --> 00:00:47,088 or you get glitter bombed. 16 00:00:47,172 --> 00:00:48,798 I don't know what that means. 17 00:00:48,882 --> 00:00:51,009 Just… all right, back it up one more step. 18 00:00:51,092 --> 00:00:54,054 Okay. Gold Rush is an entire week 19 00:00:54,137 --> 00:00:56,723 of activities and traditions. 20 00:00:56,806 --> 00:00:59,350 The most important one is Wheeler's Riddle. 21 00:00:59,434 --> 00:01:03,188 Answer correctly, that means you get it. 22 00:01:03,271 --> 00:01:07,859 You're a real Wheelerite, and you receive a red bandana. 23 00:01:08,359 --> 00:01:11,780 Answer it wrong… you get this. 24 00:01:12,280 --> 00:01:15,158 Hey. So, what's the answer to the riddle? 25 00:01:15,241 --> 00:01:18,620 You have to figure that out for yourself. 26 00:01:18,703 --> 00:01:21,664 That's the whole point. That's the way to become one of us. 27 00:01:21,748 --> 00:01:23,166 You should be grateful. 28 00:01:23,249 --> 00:01:26,252 In the early days of Gold Rush, they used to throw mud. 29 00:01:26,336 --> 00:01:30,423 Because mud… is what you have to sift through to get gold. 30 00:01:30,507 --> 00:01:32,050 See? You're on your way. 31 00:01:32,133 --> 00:01:34,010 Get on board with this, bud. 32 00:01:34,094 --> 00:01:35,845 You are not exempt from Gold Rush 33 00:01:35,929 --> 00:01:38,932 just because you're brilliant and kind 34 00:01:39,015 --> 00:01:40,850 and have a tight butt. 35 00:01:40,934 --> 00:01:43,269 You think I have a tight butt? 36 00:01:43,353 --> 00:01:45,480 Like a pool tarp. 37 00:01:45,563 --> 00:01:46,648 This is on him. 38 00:01:48,233 --> 00:01:51,361 Hi. What did Wheeler find? 39 00:01:51,945 --> 00:01:53,363 You can do it too? 40 00:02:02,789 --> 00:02:04,791 They make this stuff seem so salacious. 41 00:02:05,291 --> 00:02:08,545 Yes, I get an extra $50,000 if I get a major corporate sponsor. 42 00:02:08,628 --> 00:02:10,463 So what? It's a win-win. 43 00:02:10,547 --> 00:02:14,217 I do enjoy parking in the Pepsi/T-Mobile covered garage 44 00:02:14,300 --> 00:02:15,635 brought to you by Sephora. 45 00:02:15,718 --> 00:02:18,263 I have half a mind to march right down to that paper 46 00:02:18,346 --> 00:02:20,181 and demand they give up their sources. 47 00:02:20,265 --> 00:02:22,851 That's a very bad idea, Jack. It'll backfire. 48 00:02:23,726 --> 00:02:25,145 Are those frozen peas? 49 00:02:25,228 --> 00:02:27,730 Yes. I get migraines. This is the only thing that helps. 50 00:02:27,814 --> 00:02:28,982 Holly's right. 51 00:02:29,065 --> 00:02:30,942 And in a way, this is really good. 52 00:02:31,025 --> 00:02:34,404 The blackmailer is showing their cards, so we can use this to close in. 53 00:02:34,487 --> 00:02:35,613 You better. 54 00:02:35,697 --> 00:02:37,740 I want that laptop found immediately. 55 00:02:37,824 --> 00:02:39,951 Actually, we have an exciting new lead. 56 00:02:40,034 --> 00:02:45,206 Turns out there was at least one student on campus when your laptop was stolen. 57 00:02:45,707 --> 00:02:47,167 Our new suspect? 58 00:02:47,250 --> 00:02:48,626 Claire Chung. 59 00:02:48,710 --> 00:02:51,254 She worked the Vinick event as a caterer. 60 00:02:51,337 --> 00:02:55,216 That photo was taken with my spy glasses the night the painting was burned. 61 00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:58,386 Charles very smartly hired her as a research assistant 62 00:02:58,469 --> 00:02:59,971 to determine if she has motive. 63 00:03:00,054 --> 00:03:03,933 And Operation Claire is already in motion. 64 00:03:10,273 --> 00:03:12,609 The professors are still the primary suspects, 65 00:03:12,692 --> 00:03:15,111 so while Charles focuses on Claire, 66 00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:16,905 I'm gonna continue formal interviews. 67 00:03:16,988 --> 00:03:19,407 Okay, if that's it, let's get to work. 68 00:03:20,158 --> 00:03:21,159 Ah! 69 00:03:21,242 --> 00:03:23,077 Yeah, sorry. 70 00:03:23,161 --> 00:03:24,996 I used AI to make that. 71 00:03:25,496 --> 00:03:30,084 Okay, so box one is information on sustainability 72 00:03:30,168 --> 00:03:31,502 and suspension bridge design. 73 00:03:31,586 --> 00:03:35,757 Box two is a bunch of articles on the history of suspension bridges. 74 00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:38,927 Box three is articles on Jeff Bridges. 75 00:03:39,010 --> 00:03:41,679 I fell down a rabbit hole, but he's fascinating. 76 00:03:41,763 --> 00:03:45,642 And box four is my laundry, so don't open it. It's gross. 77 00:03:45,725 --> 00:03:46,601 Very thorough. 78 00:03:46,684 --> 00:03:48,937 Yeah, I don't know anything about the subject, 79 00:03:49,020 --> 00:03:51,272 so I kind of grabbed everything I could find. 80 00:03:51,356 --> 00:03:53,483 Is there something else I can get started on? 81 00:03:53,566 --> 00:03:56,527 The earlier you tell me, the better. I have 12 other campus jobs. 82 00:03:56,611 --> 00:03:59,197 -Yeah. -Oh, that's not a joke. 83 00:03:59,697 --> 00:04:01,241 I literally have 12 other jobs. 84 00:04:01,324 --> 00:04:03,576 Jeez. When do you sleep? 85 00:04:04,285 --> 00:04:05,286 In class. 86 00:04:05,370 --> 00:04:08,581 Maybe you should ask President Berenger for some cash. 87 00:04:08,665 --> 00:04:10,959 Seems to be rolling in it nowadays. 88 00:04:11,042 --> 00:04:15,505 Oh my God, that guy sucks. 89 00:04:15,588 --> 00:04:17,048 Oh no, is he a friend of yours? 90 00:04:17,131 --> 00:04:19,133 -No. -Oh, thank God. 91 00:04:19,217 --> 00:04:20,217 He's my son. 92 00:04:22,220 --> 00:04:23,805 I'm kidding. Sorry. 93 00:04:23,888 --> 00:04:26,057 -Professor! -I couldn't resist. 94 00:04:26,641 --> 00:04:30,645 -Do you have contact with him? -Sorry. I have to go get laundry done. 95 00:04:30,728 --> 00:04:33,564 The next free hour I'll have is when I'm a senior. 96 00:04:33,648 --> 00:04:35,275 Okay. No, please, go. Go. 97 00:04:35,358 --> 00:04:36,401 Thank you. 98 00:04:38,695 --> 00:04:42,323 Morning! I graded all your midterm papers! 99 00:04:42,407 --> 00:04:44,325 You're all real journalists now. 100 00:04:45,285 --> 00:04:48,955 I'll bet you think that makes you frickin' rock stars. 101 00:04:49,038 --> 00:04:50,290 Well, guess what? 102 00:04:51,040 --> 00:04:52,417 It frickin' does! 103 00:04:52,500 --> 00:04:58,339 You are rock stars because you expose the levers of power 104 00:04:58,423 --> 00:05:03,011 that the elites pull to screw over normal citizens like you and me. 105 00:05:03,094 --> 00:05:04,721 As George Orwell said, 106 00:05:04,804 --> 00:05:09,183 "Journalism is printing something that someone doesn't want printed." 107 00:05:09,267 --> 00:05:11,811 "Everything else is public relations." 108 00:05:13,229 --> 00:05:15,690 He also said some real bad stuff about gay people. 109 00:05:15,773 --> 00:05:17,483 It was a different time. 110 00:05:17,567 --> 00:05:20,194 Berenger's emails are being leaked to the newspaper. 111 00:05:20,278 --> 00:05:22,822 You're the faculty advisor to the newspaper. 112 00:05:22,905 --> 00:05:28,119 The student editors of the Daily Wheeler have 100% editorial independence. 113 00:05:28,202 --> 00:05:31,247 They show up day one, and I say, "Tell the truth…" 114 00:05:32,373 --> 00:05:33,958 And that's all I say. 115 00:05:35,460 --> 00:05:38,129 There's other stuff. There's other stuff I have to say. 116 00:05:38,212 --> 00:05:42,300 I have to talk about Wi-Fi passwords and the thermostat in the closet is janky, 117 00:05:42,383 --> 00:05:44,135 so you gotta toggle the switch. 118 00:05:44,218 --> 00:05:46,220 Junk like that, but mostly… 119 00:05:47,221 --> 00:05:48,973 Yeah, mostly, it's that truth thing. 120 00:05:49,057 --> 00:05:53,186 Okay. Well, what are your thoughts on Berenger? 121 00:05:53,269 --> 00:05:55,438 Wheeler used to have good presidents. 122 00:05:55,521 --> 00:05:58,816 You know, homegrown, invested in Wheeler's future. 123 00:05:58,900 --> 00:06:02,612 Berenger… is a corporate parasite. 124 00:06:02,695 --> 00:06:04,864 The board hired him to run this like a business. 125 00:06:04,947 --> 00:06:06,574 They're getting what they paid for. 126 00:06:06,657 --> 00:06:09,369 Mr. Griffin, I really want to help Wheeler College. 127 00:06:09,452 --> 00:06:12,455 I can't do that unless I know who's behind the leaks. 128 00:06:12,538 --> 00:06:14,582 I'll make it easy for you, Ms. Kovalenko. 129 00:06:14,665 --> 00:06:17,543 Even if I knew who the leak was, I wouldn't tell you. 130 00:06:17,627 --> 00:06:23,383 I would literally rather be jailed and never… ride my motorcycle again 131 00:06:23,466 --> 00:06:25,093 than betray a journalistic source. 132 00:06:25,176 --> 00:06:27,220 Now, if you'll excuse me… 133 00:06:32,350 --> 00:06:34,185 I'm parked really far away. 134 00:06:35,103 --> 00:06:37,063 I'm not gonna wear this to where I'm parked. 135 00:06:37,146 --> 00:06:38,898 -I understand. -Good. 136 00:06:43,069 --> 00:06:44,946 -What did Wheeler find? -Oh, God. 137 00:06:45,029 --> 00:06:48,116 Okay. Look, could you actually… 138 00:06:48,199 --> 00:06:50,243 I have a meeting, and I'd rather not… 139 00:06:50,910 --> 00:06:51,953 Oh, just do it. 140 00:06:59,752 --> 00:07:02,588 Okay, what did Wheeler find? 141 00:07:07,051 --> 00:07:10,513 Rude. Acorns don't have butts. 142 00:07:12,306 --> 00:07:14,350 -Hey, Dad. -Quick question. 143 00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:16,227 What did Wheeler find? 144 00:07:16,310 --> 00:07:18,479 Oh my God. Is it Gold Rush? 145 00:07:18,563 --> 00:07:20,022 Oh, Gold Rush is the best. 146 00:07:20,106 --> 00:07:22,150 Did you get glitter bombed? How many times? 147 00:07:22,233 --> 00:07:25,903 So many. Look, I just need you to make this stop, please. 148 00:07:25,987 --> 00:07:29,323 Just tell me the answer to this stupid riddle. 149 00:07:29,407 --> 00:07:31,409 What is wrong with you? You know I can't. 150 00:07:31,492 --> 00:07:33,453 Emily, I can't… I need… 151 00:07:34,078 --> 00:07:36,873 Tell me the answer this minute, or you are grounded. 152 00:07:36,956 --> 00:07:40,668 Dad. I know this seems silly, but it's actually very important. 153 00:07:40,751 --> 00:07:43,087 You have to figure this out by yourself. 154 00:07:43,171 --> 00:07:45,047 I love you. Good luck with the glitter. 155 00:07:49,135 --> 00:07:53,097 Did you see the latest leak about Berenger and his bonuses? 156 00:07:53,181 --> 00:07:55,975 I'm telling you, that guy is sus. 157 00:07:56,809 --> 00:08:02,356 I have grandkids, so when it comes to conversing with younger people, 158 00:08:02,440 --> 00:08:05,318 I eat and leave no crumbs. 159 00:08:05,401 --> 00:08:07,487 Okay, bet. 160 00:08:09,030 --> 00:08:12,742 My friend is one of the editors of the paper. 161 00:08:12,825 --> 00:08:14,994 Some random account called the Wheeler Guardian 162 00:08:15,077 --> 00:08:18,706 is just sending them emails and, like, secret files and stuff. 163 00:08:18,789 --> 00:08:20,791 -Mm. -I guess Berenger got hacked. 164 00:08:20,875 --> 00:08:22,710 Everyone thinks it's hilarious. 165 00:08:22,793 --> 00:08:25,087 -Well, nobody likes that guy, huh? -Literally no. 166 00:08:25,171 --> 00:08:27,632 He became president like right before I got here, 167 00:08:27,715 --> 00:08:30,426 and I was supposed to go on this camping retreat 168 00:08:30,510 --> 00:08:33,721 for incoming first years, and he cut the program at the last second. 169 00:08:33,804 --> 00:08:36,599 Yeah, my daughter went on that camping trip years ago. 170 00:08:36,682 --> 00:08:37,934 She met her husband there. 171 00:08:38,518 --> 00:08:40,394 -See? That's amazing. -Yeah. 172 00:08:41,103 --> 00:08:43,397 Berenger just doesn't care about stuff like that. 173 00:08:44,148 --> 00:08:46,025 Wheeler isn't just my school, you know? 174 00:08:46,108 --> 00:08:48,236 It's my home, and he's ruining it. 175 00:08:49,028 --> 00:08:51,822 You were supposed to meet me at the room 20 minutes ago. 176 00:08:51,906 --> 00:08:53,449 -I had to use Find My Friend. -God. 177 00:08:53,533 --> 00:08:56,953 I totally lost track of time. Uh… Professor, This is Hayley, my roommate. 178 00:08:57,036 --> 00:08:58,079 Nice to meet you. 179 00:08:58,162 --> 00:09:00,790 Sorry to interrupt, but we're late for rowing practice. 180 00:09:00,873 --> 00:09:03,042 I was cold, so I stole your sweatshirt. 181 00:09:03,125 --> 00:09:05,127 Oh, that's fine. I stole your overalls. 182 00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:08,130 -Oh my God. They look so good on you. -I know, right? 183 00:09:08,214 --> 00:09:10,550 I promise I'll get this done as quick as possible. 184 00:09:10,633 --> 00:09:12,426 -All good. Go. Have fun. -Okay. 185 00:09:12,510 --> 00:09:14,011 -Keep them. -Really? 186 00:09:14,095 --> 00:09:15,304 -Yes. -Want that sweater? 187 00:09:15,388 --> 00:09:16,931 -Are you kidding? Yes. -It's cute. 188 00:09:18,891 --> 00:09:20,560 What did Wheeler find? 189 00:09:21,143 --> 00:09:24,605 Whatever you're about to do, I would think twice. 190 00:09:25,189 --> 00:09:26,482 Uh, y… Yes, ma'am. 191 00:09:29,402 --> 00:09:31,654 -Hey. -Hey, Julie. Great news. 192 00:09:31,737 --> 00:09:33,864 All the kids here think I'm really cool. 193 00:09:34,740 --> 00:09:38,619 Also, Claire hates Berenger. 194 00:09:38,703 --> 00:09:43,624 And she has access to the newspaper, so she had motive and means. 195 00:09:43,708 --> 00:09:45,793 I'm telling you, something's going on here. 196 00:09:45,876 --> 00:09:47,628 Okay. Send me updates. 197 00:09:47,712 --> 00:09:49,088 Okay. Bet. 198 00:09:49,714 --> 00:09:50,756 Ugh. 199 00:09:52,300 --> 00:09:53,759 Hey. What did Wheeler find? 200 00:09:54,552 --> 00:09:57,138 Oh, come on! You're gonna have to clean it up! 201 00:09:59,098 --> 00:10:00,349 Worth it. 202 00:10:05,605 --> 00:10:07,982 Oh, the structural engineer. 203 00:10:08,482 --> 00:10:10,776 Been out marveling at walls, have you? 204 00:10:11,360 --> 00:10:13,154 Help. Please. 205 00:10:13,237 --> 00:10:18,409 So, to be clear, a riddle easily solved by 18-year-old children 206 00:10:18,492 --> 00:10:21,078 has kerfuffled your intellectual processing. 207 00:10:21,162 --> 00:10:23,956 Just… give me a hint. 208 00:10:24,457 --> 00:10:27,501 I've swallowed an entire disco ball. 209 00:10:31,047 --> 00:10:33,007 Have you noticed I don't like you very much? 210 00:10:33,090 --> 00:10:34,800 -I have. -Oh, good. 211 00:10:34,884 --> 00:10:38,137 I worried that perhaps you were too busy thinking about rivets. 212 00:10:38,220 --> 00:10:42,558 The reason I don't like you very much is that recently, 213 00:10:42,642 --> 00:10:43,768 to save money, 214 00:10:43,851 --> 00:10:47,521 Wheeler College has resorted to hiring visiting lecturers, 215 00:10:47,605 --> 00:10:50,107 like you, instead of tenured professors. 216 00:10:50,191 --> 00:10:53,819 Now, the least you can do in your short time here 217 00:10:53,903 --> 00:10:56,572 is attempt to understand why those of us 218 00:10:56,656 --> 00:11:00,534 who have devoted our lives to this school care so deeply. 219 00:11:01,702 --> 00:11:02,745 Fair enough. 220 00:11:03,537 --> 00:11:04,538 How? 221 00:11:05,623 --> 00:11:09,794 You seem to have bonded with Professor Margadoff. 222 00:11:10,628 --> 00:11:14,924 Find her and tell her that you would like to walk the Golden Path. 223 00:11:16,801 --> 00:11:19,595 That sounds a lot slower than you just telling me. 224 00:11:19,679 --> 00:11:21,639 Oh, it's much slower! 225 00:11:28,020 --> 00:11:31,941 Essentially, the moral calculations surrounding actions 226 00:11:32,024 --> 00:11:35,111 should not be limited to what happens immediately. 227 00:11:35,194 --> 00:11:36,487 Thank you, everyone. 228 00:11:36,570 --> 00:11:37,988 See you Friday. 229 00:11:39,407 --> 00:11:40,825 Now a good time to talk? 230 00:11:41,325 --> 00:11:43,202 Sure. I have about an hour. 231 00:11:43,285 --> 00:11:46,497 Sorry, Professor. Can I just ask a quick ethical question? 232 00:11:47,665 --> 00:11:49,041 My roommate cut her own bangs. 233 00:11:49,125 --> 00:11:52,878 And you want to know if you can lie and say they look good. 234 00:11:53,462 --> 00:11:55,715 Okay, yeah. This has happened before. 235 00:11:55,798 --> 00:11:57,591 So here's my position on this. 236 00:11:57,675 --> 00:11:58,759 Yeah. Good. 237 00:11:58,843 --> 00:12:00,720 Take notes. I have a lot of thoughts. 238 00:12:00,803 --> 00:12:01,887 Let me gather them. 239 00:12:01,971 --> 00:12:06,475 So in that sense there is no difference between giving yourself curtain bangs 240 00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:09,895 and committing the mass murder of innocent civilians. 241 00:12:09,979 --> 00:12:13,691 I think that's as close as we're gonna get to a moral answer. 242 00:12:14,358 --> 00:12:15,901 Wow, that was incredible. 243 00:12:16,569 --> 00:12:18,028 Thank you so much. 244 00:12:18,738 --> 00:12:20,030 Sorry about that. 245 00:12:20,114 --> 00:12:23,701 I have a standing rule that any student can come to me 246 00:12:23,784 --> 00:12:28,164 with a moral dilemma at any time, and I'll… talk it out with them. 247 00:12:28,664 --> 00:12:30,458 It's a moot point by now. 248 00:12:30,541 --> 00:12:33,627 You talked for so long, that girl's bangs have grown out. 249 00:12:34,628 --> 00:12:35,755 I'll cut to the chase. 250 00:12:35,838 --> 00:12:38,924 Did you steal Vinick's portrait and burn it in the garbage can? 251 00:12:39,008 --> 00:12:41,886 It would be ironic for a professor of moral philosophy 252 00:12:41,969 --> 00:12:43,304 to be involved in arson. 253 00:12:43,387 --> 00:12:44,472 Not an answer. 254 00:12:44,555 --> 00:12:48,017 Nobody can account for your whereabouts the last ten minutes of the party. 255 00:12:48,100 --> 00:12:49,226 Where were you? 256 00:12:49,310 --> 00:12:52,980 Well, to answer that question, we first need to ask another one. 257 00:12:53,063 --> 00:12:56,442 How does any of us really know if we are ever truly anywhere? 258 00:12:56,525 --> 00:12:57,902 Oh my God! 259 00:12:57,985 --> 00:13:03,574 Okay, I am going to assume that your moral code means you can't lie. 260 00:13:03,657 --> 00:13:06,202 So I'll make this easy. Did you burn the painting? 261 00:13:06,285 --> 00:13:07,787 -No. -Do you know who did? 262 00:13:07,870 --> 00:13:09,663 -No! -I mean, you could be lying. 263 00:13:09,747 --> 00:13:10,748 I'm not. 264 00:13:11,874 --> 00:13:15,085 Okay, well, this was a waste of time. 265 00:13:15,753 --> 00:13:17,129 One last thing. 266 00:13:17,963 --> 00:13:19,715 How do you feel about Jack Berenger? 267 00:13:19,799 --> 00:13:22,802 Berenger is the human equivalent of a curtain bang. 268 00:13:22,885 --> 00:13:25,846 Hiring an outsider with no connection to Wheeler 269 00:13:25,930 --> 00:13:28,808 was the worst decision this college has ever made. 270 00:13:30,476 --> 00:13:32,895 Very chatty all of a sudden. 271 00:13:34,104 --> 00:13:35,105 What got into you? 272 00:13:35,689 --> 00:13:39,443 Well, to answer that, we have to begin by asking, what are words? 273 00:13:39,527 --> 00:13:40,527 Okay, goodbye. 274 00:13:41,821 --> 00:13:46,408 Okay, stop one on the Golden Path. 275 00:13:46,492 --> 00:13:50,162 According to legend, this is the creek where Francis Wheeler 276 00:13:50,246 --> 00:13:51,747 first started panning for gold. 277 00:13:51,831 --> 00:13:56,001 It starts way up north in the mountains and ends up here on the campus. 278 00:13:56,085 --> 00:13:59,338 And when the new students arrive, we give them sifters and shovels 279 00:13:59,421 --> 00:14:02,132 and they spend a whole day panning for gold. 280 00:14:02,216 --> 00:14:03,509 Has anyone ever found any? 281 00:14:03,592 --> 00:14:10,432 No, because there isn't any gold in this creek, and there never was. 282 00:14:10,516 --> 00:14:14,103 Wheeler looked for years, and he came up empty, 283 00:14:14,186 --> 00:14:15,479 and that's the whole point. 284 00:14:15,563 --> 00:14:18,274 No one ever finds anything. 285 00:14:19,066 --> 00:14:23,779 Well, ten years ago somebody did find a huge bag of shrooms. 286 00:14:23,863 --> 00:14:24,905 What did you do? 287 00:14:24,989 --> 00:14:28,075 We "turned it in" to the "police." 288 00:14:29,660 --> 00:14:31,412 This is the very spot 289 00:14:31,495 --> 00:14:34,623 where Wheeler decided to start his school. 290 00:14:34,707 --> 00:14:38,335 He had realized that wealth was fleeting 291 00:14:38,836 --> 00:14:43,257 and that the true accomplishment would be to create something lasting. 292 00:14:43,340 --> 00:14:44,925 At the beginning of year two, 293 00:14:45,009 --> 00:14:49,763 all the kids come here to think about what they might want to study, 294 00:14:49,847 --> 00:14:55,227 what's important to them, how to design a meaningful life. 295 00:14:55,728 --> 00:15:00,190 I came here after I took those mushrooms that kid found in the creek. 296 00:15:00,816 --> 00:15:04,111 It was… a mistake. 297 00:15:05,863 --> 00:15:07,698 The Garden of Wisdom. 298 00:15:07,781 --> 00:15:11,952 All of these stones were placed here by Wheeler graduates. 299 00:15:12,453 --> 00:15:16,290 When people come back here for reunions or whatever, 300 00:15:16,373 --> 00:15:18,667 they write on these rocks 301 00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:21,420 things they wish they had known when they were in school. 302 00:15:21,503 --> 00:15:24,423 And the kids come here at the beginning of junior year, 303 00:15:24,506 --> 00:15:26,342 and they spend a whole day 304 00:15:26,425 --> 00:15:29,553 just reading all this wisdom from the past. 305 00:15:29,637 --> 00:15:31,722 -That is so neat. -Yeah. 306 00:15:31,805 --> 00:15:35,809 "By the time you graduate, you should know something about everything 307 00:15:35,893 --> 00:15:37,686 and everything about something." 308 00:15:37,770 --> 00:15:39,605 What does this one say? 309 00:15:40,272 --> 00:15:42,191 "Never trust an Irishman." 310 00:15:42,274 --> 00:15:43,150 Oh. 311 00:15:43,233 --> 00:15:44,652 Okay, some of these are old. 312 00:15:44,735 --> 00:15:46,195 I'm gonna throw it away. 313 00:15:47,237 --> 00:15:51,951 Last stop on the Golden Path, the Wall of Reflection. 314 00:15:52,034 --> 00:15:55,537 You pass this 1,000 times over four years, 315 00:15:55,621 --> 00:15:59,041 but on the day you graduate, you come here, 316 00:15:59,124 --> 00:16:01,126 you stand in this spot, 317 00:16:01,210 --> 00:16:04,964 and you finally see the person you've become 318 00:16:05,047 --> 00:16:07,007 during your time here. 319 00:16:11,470 --> 00:16:12,805 Whoa! 320 00:16:13,305 --> 00:16:16,892 All of those people are Wheeler graduates or teachers, 321 00:16:16,976 --> 00:16:19,770 dating back to the very beginning of the school. 322 00:16:19,853 --> 00:16:21,355 You're one of us now. 323 00:16:21,855 --> 00:16:24,942 So, I ask you one more time. 324 00:16:25,025 --> 00:16:28,237 Francis Wheeler came here in search of gold, 325 00:16:28,320 --> 00:16:31,407 but he found something much more important. 326 00:16:31,490 --> 00:16:33,951 What did Wheeler find? 327 00:16:34,034 --> 00:16:35,911 I feel like I have some guesses, 328 00:16:35,995 --> 00:16:39,581 but I don't know if I have the exact answer. 329 00:16:39,665 --> 00:16:40,541 Oh my God. 330 00:16:40,624 --> 00:16:42,710 I really hate to do this. 331 00:16:42,793 --> 00:16:43,627 You wouldn't. 332 00:16:43,711 --> 00:16:44,753 I wouldn't?! 333 00:16:46,088 --> 00:16:47,673 Tom Selleck went here? 334 00:16:47,756 --> 00:16:48,632 What? 335 00:16:48,716 --> 00:16:50,759 No, no, no, no, no! 336 00:17:01,395 --> 00:17:04,898 "Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!" 337 00:17:05,399 --> 00:17:10,404 The statue that bears that inscription has been reduced to dust. 338 00:17:10,904 --> 00:17:16,660 Shelley's poem, however, is still amongst the most famous in the Western canon. 339 00:17:16,744 --> 00:17:19,455 A few years ago, when I was in London, 340 00:17:19,538 --> 00:17:22,249 I visited the building where Charles Dickens 341 00:17:22,332 --> 00:17:25,461 wrote the first lines of Bleak House. 342 00:17:25,544 --> 00:17:28,172 It is now a Burger King. 343 00:17:28,255 --> 00:17:30,799 People do not last. 344 00:17:30,883 --> 00:17:34,470 Money, fame, power does not last. 345 00:17:34,553 --> 00:17:36,096 But ideas… 346 00:17:36,180 --> 00:17:39,933 Ideas born of passion can endure. 347 00:17:43,812 --> 00:17:45,898 Dr. Cole, do you have a minute? 348 00:17:45,981 --> 00:17:46,982 Oh. 349 00:17:48,067 --> 00:17:49,234 The gumshoe. 350 00:17:49,318 --> 00:17:53,447 Am I under arrest for teaching books that you can't buy in an airport? 351 00:17:53,530 --> 00:17:57,076 Quick question, do you know who's leaking emails to the school paper? 352 00:17:57,159 --> 00:17:59,203 Well, running right at it, eh? 353 00:17:59,286 --> 00:18:02,748 Aren't you supposed to be a bit cagier in your investigations? 354 00:18:02,831 --> 00:18:04,333 The time for caginess has passed. 355 00:18:04,416 --> 00:18:07,336 -I'm going with direct assault now. -Fair enough. 356 00:18:07,419 --> 00:18:11,131 I do not know who is leaking Berenger's private information, 357 00:18:11,215 --> 00:18:13,175 although I applaud them heartily. 358 00:18:13,258 --> 00:18:15,928 -You seem to really love Wheeler. -Mm-hmm. 359 00:18:16,011 --> 00:18:18,305 Are you not worried about all of this chaos? 360 00:18:18,388 --> 00:18:22,184 Oh, I am, but sadly, we've brought it all on ourselves. 361 00:18:22,267 --> 00:18:25,020 The moment the board chose Jack Berenger for president, 362 00:18:25,104 --> 00:18:28,065 they set this school on a path of self-destruction. 363 00:18:28,148 --> 00:18:30,025 All of this became inevitable. 364 00:18:30,109 --> 00:18:35,030 Although I suppose I can't fault them for choosing Berenger. 365 00:18:35,114 --> 00:18:37,991 After all, he has an MBA. 366 00:18:38,492 --> 00:18:40,369 That takes two whole years. 367 00:18:43,372 --> 00:18:46,625 -Professor, you have a second? -Yes, of course. Come on in. 368 00:18:47,417 --> 00:18:49,378 So, um… 369 00:18:50,629 --> 00:18:53,882 I apologize, but I think you need to find a new research assistant. 370 00:18:53,966 --> 00:18:54,966 Oh. 371 00:18:57,010 --> 00:18:59,054 May I ask why? 372 00:18:59,138 --> 00:19:00,514 I have to drop out of Wheeler. 373 00:19:00,597 --> 00:19:03,684 Unless, is there any chance being your research assistant 374 00:19:03,767 --> 00:19:05,936 pays $86,000 a year? 375 00:19:06,019 --> 00:19:07,354 -It does not. -Figured. 376 00:19:07,437 --> 00:19:10,399 My first two years, I had a bunch of loans and grants 377 00:19:10,482 --> 00:19:12,442 and the rest of my tuition was paid for 378 00:19:12,526 --> 00:19:14,903 because my family is under the income threshold, 379 00:19:14,987 --> 00:19:17,364 but President Berenger got rid of that rule. 380 00:19:17,447 --> 00:19:19,700 And that's why you have so many jobs. 381 00:19:19,783 --> 00:19:23,912 But it's barely making a dent, so this will be my final semester. 382 00:19:23,996 --> 00:19:25,330 Really sorry to hear that. 383 00:19:25,414 --> 00:19:26,832 I know how much you love it. 384 00:19:26,915 --> 00:19:28,959 I do, but I made a lot of memories here, 385 00:19:29,042 --> 00:19:31,920 and you can't really put a price tag on that, you know? 386 00:19:33,046 --> 00:19:36,675 Well, actually, you can. It's $86,000 a year. 387 00:19:45,851 --> 00:19:48,770 Professor Nieuwendyk. Hi. Good to see you again. 388 00:19:48,854 --> 00:19:51,106 Oh! Hi, yes. Of course. Nice to see you too. 389 00:19:51,190 --> 00:19:54,318 Good to see you. Yeah. I can't believe I have to watch this. 390 00:19:54,401 --> 00:19:56,528 If I wanted to sit through a crappy recital, 391 00:19:56,612 --> 00:19:59,406 regretting all my life's decisions, I would have had kids. 392 00:20:00,199 --> 00:20:01,450 Any updates? 393 00:20:01,533 --> 00:20:03,118 Claire's leaving school, 394 00:20:03,202 --> 00:20:06,205 thanks to Berenger's new cost-cutting moves. 395 00:20:06,288 --> 00:20:09,333 She can't afford it, and she's pissed. 396 00:20:09,833 --> 00:20:11,418 How'd your interviews go? 397 00:20:11,919 --> 00:20:15,297 No love lost between the faculty and Berenger either. 398 00:20:15,380 --> 00:20:17,591 Hey, let's keep our eye out at this thing. 399 00:20:17,674 --> 00:20:20,928 See if we notice any subtle signs of discontent. 400 00:20:21,011 --> 00:20:23,180 Oh. Hey. 401 00:20:24,723 --> 00:20:25,766 Thank you. 402 00:20:25,849 --> 00:20:31,647 That was a composition from 1916, written by a Wheeler graduate. 403 00:20:31,730 --> 00:20:33,857 We did change the name of the song. 404 00:20:33,941 --> 00:20:37,986 It is now called, "Don't Drown the Harlot in the River." 405 00:20:43,700 --> 00:20:46,370 My grandkids taught me that. It hurts. 406 00:20:46,453 --> 00:20:47,454 What a delight. 407 00:20:47,537 --> 00:20:51,041 Thank you, Professor Margadoff, and good afternoon, everyone. 408 00:20:51,124 --> 00:20:52,000 You suck! 409 00:20:52,084 --> 00:20:55,671 We gather here today for one of our most indelible traditions. 410 00:20:55,754 --> 00:21:01,885 Every year, we plant a young sapling that will blossom into a new tree, 411 00:21:01,969 --> 00:21:05,889 joining our forest of mighty oaks. 412 00:21:06,390 --> 00:21:07,849 As we say, 413 00:21:07,933 --> 00:21:10,894 Wheeler isn't one person. 414 00:21:11,561 --> 00:21:14,523 Wheeler is all of us. 415 00:21:15,691 --> 00:21:16,691 Thank you. 416 00:21:19,027 --> 00:21:20,570 Oh, what are you doing? 417 00:21:20,654 --> 00:21:22,572 Ah! 418 00:21:22,656 --> 00:21:24,241 I've been covered in mud! 419 00:21:24,741 --> 00:21:27,703 Protect me! Protect me! 420 00:21:28,829 --> 00:21:32,040 I think I noticed a subtle sign of discontent. 421 00:21:35,836 --> 00:21:37,212 Take these to the dry cleaner. 422 00:21:37,296 --> 00:21:40,007 Have them washed and checked for bullet holes. 423 00:21:40,090 --> 00:21:42,092 Okay. Okay. Let's calm down. 424 00:21:42,175 --> 00:21:43,218 You weren't shot. 425 00:21:43,302 --> 00:21:45,304 I was covered in mud. 426 00:21:45,387 --> 00:21:48,557 You know, in many cultures, that's considered worse. 427 00:21:48,640 --> 00:21:51,560 What if it's not mud next time? 428 00:21:53,770 --> 00:21:55,397 What if it's poo? 429 00:21:55,897 --> 00:21:57,482 Okay, this is getting away from us. 430 00:21:57,566 --> 00:22:00,861 You need to find that mad mudder before Berenger falls to pieces. 431 00:22:00,944 --> 00:22:02,029 So start with Claire. 432 00:22:02,112 --> 00:22:05,073 See if she was angry enough to throw a grenade on her way out. 433 00:22:05,157 --> 00:22:06,450 What are you gonna do? 434 00:22:07,117 --> 00:22:09,411 I have to ask our client a few questions. 435 00:22:13,248 --> 00:22:15,208 Hey, Holly. I really need to talk. Oh. 436 00:22:16,710 --> 00:22:18,295 -Are you okay? -Oh. 437 00:22:18,879 --> 00:22:20,881 Yeah, I'm fine. Uh… 438 00:22:20,964 --> 00:22:24,259 Every day at two o'clock, I cry really hard for ten minutes. 439 00:22:24,343 --> 00:22:25,635 -What's up? -Okay. 440 00:22:25,719 --> 00:22:29,723 I need you to tell me what happened two years ago when Berenger was hired. 441 00:22:29,806 --> 00:22:34,644 Uh… well, it was… down to Berenger and one other person. 442 00:22:34,728 --> 00:22:36,980 The board went with Berenger. Pretty typical. 443 00:22:37,064 --> 00:22:40,150 Except the other candidate was Ben Cole, wasn't it? 444 00:22:41,401 --> 00:22:45,405 So your close friend got passed over for a job that Berenger got. 445 00:22:45,489 --> 00:22:47,783 A fact you neglected to mention to me, 446 00:22:47,866 --> 00:22:52,746 the PI you hired to investigate a crime against Jack Berenger. 447 00:22:52,829 --> 00:22:54,414 Because it's not important. 448 00:22:54,498 --> 00:22:56,375 Are you telling me Cole wasn't angry? 449 00:22:56,458 --> 00:22:59,503 Angry enough to steal a laptop and blackmail the guy 450 00:22:59,586 --> 00:23:00,921 who beat him for the job? 451 00:23:01,004 --> 00:23:04,257 That's exactly what I'm telling you, and I can prove it. 452 00:23:05,425 --> 00:23:06,843 Dr. Cole, welcome. 453 00:23:06,927 --> 00:23:08,887 We're excited to speak about your candidacy. 454 00:23:08,970 --> 00:23:10,597 Thank you, Keith. 455 00:23:10,680 --> 00:23:12,516 I've prepared a statement. 456 00:23:12,599 --> 00:23:15,644 This interview is a grotesque farce. 457 00:23:16,144 --> 00:23:20,190 We all know I'm not actually a candidate for the presidency. 458 00:23:20,273 --> 00:23:22,484 In fact, I'd bet a fair amount of money 459 00:23:22,567 --> 00:23:25,487 Keith isn't even listening to me right now. 460 00:23:25,570 --> 00:23:28,281 Indeed, I can see by the reflection in his glasses 461 00:23:28,365 --> 00:23:30,617 that he is playing Minesweeper. 462 00:23:30,700 --> 00:23:35,956 Wheeler College deserves to be guided by someone who cares more about books 463 00:23:36,039 --> 00:23:40,502 than balance sheets, which obviously will not be the case. 464 00:23:40,585 --> 00:23:46,967 So good luck sealing Wheeler College into a tomb of greed and ignorance, Keith. 465 00:23:47,050 --> 00:23:48,927 You impossible twit. 466 00:23:49,886 --> 00:23:51,179 Thank you, Dr. Cole. 467 00:23:51,263 --> 00:23:53,098 Inspirational, as always. 468 00:23:53,181 --> 00:23:54,182 Thank you. 469 00:23:55,559 --> 00:23:58,228 Ben wasn't angry at Berenger. 470 00:23:58,311 --> 00:24:00,981 He was angry at the state of higher education. 471 00:24:01,565 --> 00:24:04,609 Well, I still think it's relevant he was denied the job. 472 00:24:05,569 --> 00:24:08,113 I've known the man almost 40 years. 473 00:24:08,196 --> 00:24:09,739 He's like a brother to me. 474 00:24:09,823 --> 00:24:13,285 I guarantee he is not the person you're looking for. 475 00:24:17,747 --> 00:24:19,040 Everything okay? 476 00:24:20,375 --> 00:24:22,294 Yeah. Yeah. 477 00:24:22,377 --> 00:24:23,253 Thanks. 478 00:24:23,336 --> 00:24:26,798 Every year, it costs more and more for the students. 479 00:24:26,882 --> 00:24:29,342 And we work harder and harder to make ends meet. 480 00:24:29,426 --> 00:24:32,679 The president of this college profits from slashing student programs 481 00:24:32,762 --> 00:24:34,306 and reducing financial aid! 482 00:24:35,474 --> 00:24:37,184 Enough is enough! 483 00:24:37,267 --> 00:24:39,895 -Hit the road, Jack! -Hit the road, Jack! 484 00:24:39,978 --> 00:24:41,605 Hit the road, Jack! 485 00:24:41,688 --> 00:24:44,733 Hit the road, Jack! Hit the road, Jack! 486 00:24:44,816 --> 00:24:46,109 Hit the road, Jack! 487 00:24:46,193 --> 00:24:48,361 Hit the road, Jack! 488 00:24:48,445 --> 00:24:49,988 Okay, where do we stand? 489 00:24:50,071 --> 00:24:51,990 Have you found the would-be assassin? 490 00:24:52,491 --> 00:24:54,284 I haven't found the perpetrator, no. 491 00:24:54,367 --> 00:24:57,329 In fact… I've decided not to look. 492 00:24:57,412 --> 00:24:58,538 Why not? 493 00:24:58,622 --> 00:25:00,081 Because it wouldn't matter. 494 00:25:00,165 --> 00:25:01,333 Could have been anyone. 495 00:25:01,416 --> 00:25:03,376 So we're just gonna do nothing? 496 00:25:03,460 --> 00:25:05,962 No. No, you're gonna do something. 497 00:25:07,005 --> 00:25:10,759 You're gonna approach the board and tell them you're returning your bonuses. 498 00:25:10,842 --> 00:25:15,931 You're also going to convince them to reinstate the free tuition threshold. 499 00:25:16,014 --> 00:25:17,933 Why in the world would I do that? 500 00:25:18,016 --> 00:25:20,977 We're trying to find the person who's blackmailing you, 501 00:25:21,061 --> 00:25:22,979 and right now, everybody hates you. 502 00:25:23,063 --> 00:25:25,857 You're the symbol of everything that's wrong at Wheeler. 503 00:25:25,941 --> 00:25:28,443 High tuition, cut programs. 504 00:25:28,527 --> 00:25:30,904 You need to lower the temperature on campus, 505 00:25:30,987 --> 00:25:32,948 or we're never gonna find this person. 506 00:25:34,366 --> 00:25:36,868 For the record, I think the board would go for this, 507 00:25:36,952 --> 00:25:38,495 and it could be some good PR. 508 00:25:41,164 --> 00:25:44,042 Okay. You know, the board might just go for it. 509 00:25:44,125 --> 00:25:45,961 And it could be some good PR. 510 00:25:46,044 --> 00:25:47,712 I'll make the announcement tomorrow. 511 00:25:47,796 --> 00:25:50,632 I took the liberty of writing your speech. 512 00:25:50,715 --> 00:25:51,800 Ah, wonderful. 513 00:25:54,010 --> 00:25:57,889 Being covered in mud was a shock, but it was also a wake-up call. 514 00:25:57,973 --> 00:26:00,559 I'm proud to announce that we will be restoring 515 00:26:00,642 --> 00:26:02,519 our financial aid policy 516 00:26:02,602 --> 00:26:06,189 so that students from all economic backgrounds 517 00:26:06,273 --> 00:26:08,650 can benefit from a Wheeler education. 518 00:26:09,234 --> 00:26:14,197 I am also returning all bonus payments I personally received. 519 00:26:14,781 --> 00:26:17,284 Actually I'm keeping $42. 520 00:26:17,367 --> 00:26:19,869 That's how much it costs to dry-clean the suit. 521 00:26:22,038 --> 00:26:23,456 Good joke, right? 522 00:26:23,540 --> 00:26:24,624 Well-written. 523 00:26:25,625 --> 00:26:27,210 -Hi, Professor. -Claire. 524 00:26:27,294 --> 00:26:29,713 Hey, good news, right? You get to stay? 525 00:26:29,796 --> 00:26:31,381 It's gonna be tough. 526 00:26:31,464 --> 00:26:34,384 In addition to my 12 jobs, I'll have to get five more jobs, 527 00:26:34,467 --> 00:26:36,469 but, yeah, I think I can make it work. 528 00:26:36,553 --> 00:26:38,305 That's great. I'm so glad. 529 00:26:39,306 --> 00:26:40,765 Do me one favor, though. 530 00:26:41,933 --> 00:26:45,478 Tell your roommate, Hayley, not to attack anyone else 531 00:26:45,562 --> 00:26:48,607 with any buckets of anything, please. 532 00:26:50,775 --> 00:26:51,860 How did you know? 533 00:26:52,527 --> 00:26:53,778 I thought it was you. 534 00:26:53,862 --> 00:26:56,740 The person who attacked Berenger was wearing pink sneakers. 535 00:26:56,823 --> 00:26:59,326 And one of the first things I noticed about you was 536 00:26:59,409 --> 00:27:02,120 that you wore pink sneakers pretty much every day. 537 00:27:02,203 --> 00:27:05,290 Then I remembered that you and Hayley share your clothes. 538 00:27:05,373 --> 00:27:08,710 And I figured she got angry when you had to drop out. 539 00:27:09,294 --> 00:27:11,171 Exacted her revenge. 540 00:27:11,254 --> 00:27:14,591 She was real pissed when she read about how much money Berenger makes. 541 00:27:14,674 --> 00:27:15,842 Mm. 542 00:27:15,925 --> 00:27:17,469 You gonna tell anyone? 543 00:27:17,969 --> 00:27:21,723 You get to stay at Wheeler, but your best friend has to leave? 544 00:27:22,307 --> 00:27:24,643 Doesn't make a lot of sense, does it? 545 00:27:27,520 --> 00:27:29,731 Uh, hey, I have a question for you. 546 00:27:31,066 --> 00:27:32,776 What did Wheeler find? 547 00:27:32,859 --> 00:27:35,236 All right, I've been… thinking about this a lot. 548 00:27:35,320 --> 00:27:36,696 I don't know if it's right, 549 00:27:36,780 --> 00:27:40,116 but I think he came here searching for gold, 550 00:27:40,200 --> 00:27:43,703 but what he found… was a family. 551 00:27:47,540 --> 00:27:49,834 Ah-ha. 552 00:27:49,918 --> 00:27:51,920 -Thank you. -Gotcha! 553 00:27:52,003 --> 00:27:54,547 Wha...? I got the thing! 554 00:27:54,631 --> 00:27:56,925 -What… I figured it out! What's... -Oh. 555 00:27:57,008 --> 00:27:58,843 Oh, I'm sorry. 556 00:27:58,927 --> 00:28:01,221 I didn't see that. 557 00:28:01,304 --> 00:28:02,430 Claire! 558 00:28:02,514 --> 00:28:04,557 Oh, I haven't seen you for so long. 559 00:28:04,641 --> 00:28:06,226 I know. You wanna get coffee? 560 00:28:06,309 --> 00:28:07,977 -That would be great. -Okay. 561 00:28:08,061 --> 00:28:10,313 Yes, my treat. Okay. 43607

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