Original subtitles

Baby, I want to get in your veins.

Baby,

you got no one but yourself to blame.

You can't run, you can't hide.

Welcome to your QMI.

You don't know what I'm gonna do.

You're a...

And I'll give you everything you need.

Oh, yeah.

I'll give you a lifetime.

A lifetime of misery.

Your reign is my legacy.

Oh, duh.

I got something in store for you.

There ain't nothing that

I promise you a lifetime, a lifetime of memory.

Don't you ever get tired of watching me?

Never.

Like I have no will of my own.

Well, it's true.

I feel drawn to you in ways I never thought possible.

Well, are you ready to pick the next level, then?

I mean, uh... I know this place back there.

It's quiet.

It's crowded.

It's just very new.

Not here.

My band's parked outside.

Have to be back before my bedtime.

Cheers.

Cool.

I don't

know.

Mm -hmm.

Wait, wait, wait.

Where do you think you're going, huh?

It's a crime scene with Connie. You're not supposed to be here.

It's okay, Detective Trout.

I'm a reporter.

Oh. Guys, did you hear that? She's a reporter.

Scat. I will not scat.

Normally I scoot, scram, or skedaddle.

You got spunk. Mm -hmm.

I hate spunk.

What are you trying to do, Connor? Get your own column?

It's funny you should say that. I already have one.

It's called Crime Beat.

Have you ever heard of it?

Or don't you read?

Yeah, I read, and I barely have to move my lips when I do it. But I never read

your column, and believe me, I never heard of you either.

You know what? I'll send you a copy. Now, excuse me. Do you have a column to

write, Detective?

What do you think you're doing, huh?

You think there's some kind of game I'm playing here?

I could slap you in cuffs right now, you know that?

There's a crime scene, and you're not allowed here.

On whose authority?

Mine.

Why? Is this guy famous or something?

Well, he is now.

So why don't you just get out of here before I get grumpy on you, huh?

This isn't over, Detective Trout. It never is.

I'll go over your head. Go.

I'll have your ass. Take it.

Tommy?

You here?

Hello?

Oh, gosh.

Don't do that, honey.

I thought you heard me. No, I didn't.

Well, that was quick.

Yeah, I ran into this grouchy cop who's mad at the world, and we had a few

words. Well, you've got a right to be there. Freedom of the press and all

Well, according to Detective Trout, I only have the right to remain silent.

Well, anyway, I'm glad you're home early.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Please.

I didn't hear you come in.

I called, but you didn't answer.

Right.

I gotta go.

I've got a meeting. I'll be late.

Okay.

Good luck.

Right. Love you.

Good morning, Mr.

Andrews. Good morning, Jill.

You got a minute?

Sure. You want to have a seat?

So how'd everything go this morning?

I finally made it down to the crime scene and got blown off before I could

anything.

So I decided I'm going to head down to the precinct this afternoon and see if I

can sneak a peek at the coroner's report.

Good.

I've been going over your columns from the last few months.

I'm sorry to say they've become pretty lifeless.

Lifeless.

Lifeless.

Your work used to have a certain snap, a kind of witty, cutting -edge approach

to murder and mayhem, without actually crossing the line of the bad taste.

Well, not too often, anyway.

Jill, it's just not there anymore.

So are you giving me the booth?

No, of course not.

I just wanted to see if there was anything that I could do to help bring

of this slump.

Jill, is everything okay at home? Any personal problems, health problems?

No, nothing that I want to talk about, okay?

Well, then, just start thinking creatively again, okay? Be daring. Take

chance. Get that old fire back in the furnace.

We need your column, Jill.

Thank you, sir.

We need it to be good.

I heard you.

I know you're going to think of something.

Do you remember that time you exposed that white slave ring down in Chinatown?

Oh, come on. I was practically raped with a broom handle.

You just can't make stuff like that up.

Bye.

You want daring?

I can be daring.

Yeah.

I can be real daring.

Edward Pennington

How the hell am I supposed to read this important thing made out of finger

paint? Do it again.

What the hell are you doing here?

He's alive.

It's a little early in the day to be hitting a toss, isn't it?

I'm telling you.

This guy is alive.

Yeah?

Well, if you say so.

Maybe my imagination has gotten the best of me. Yeah, maybe it has.

All right, come on, let's go.

Look, whether you like it or not, I have a column to write here.

And if you keep this up, I might write something special about you in it.

Really? Yeah.

Oh, shit.

I guess in that case, I better give you my business card.

Make sure you spell my name right.

Detective Trout.

You don't have a first name?

No, I don't.

Come on.

Can't you help me out here?

I'm just trying to do my job.

Listen, sister.

We have rules we have to live by around here, okay? Unlike you, I can't be

running off my mouth anytime I want to.

My news service is a socially respectable news agency.

I mean, what's the difference?

He's already dead.

I think.

I thought you said he was alive.

All right, look, maybe we're getting off on the wrong foot here, okay?

Obviously, we both have a job to do.

Let's say you let me buy you a cup of coffee, and maybe we can come to some

of compromise, huh?

Okay.

You're buying.

That's what I just said.

There you go.

A couple of Joe's finest.

Flying a girl with drink?

It's a simple cop on a simple cop's paycheck.

Touché.

So, Detective Trout, I need something to keep the wolves at bay.

I got them nipping at my butt, and I hardly got a fanny left.

Good for me, kid.

I'm serious.

I need you to spill your guts.

You never let up, do you?

I can.

So how about it?

Well, I guess it's going to get out sooner or later, so, okay.

Guy's name was Edward Pennington. Mutual funds, right? Big house up in Beverly

Glen, no pets.

So what happened to him?

Well, we don't know.

Somebody stabbed him in the neck with a sharp object.

Motive?

Robbery.

Robbery? Yeah.

Somebody stole all the guy's blood.

No shit.

No, honey, this is real shit.

So what do you do now?

Yeah, now they're going to cremate the body.

They move awfully quick, don't they?

Yeah, I know, but that's what the family wants.

Me too.

So, uh, the killer.

You think you'll catch him?

Oh, yeah.

Him or her.

Hello? Hi, honey.

Hey.

Um, I was wondering if you were still going to be working late tonight.

Yeah, looks like it.

Well, do you want me to put a plate for you in the fridge?

Nah, I think I'm going to eat out.

Listen, honey, I'm right in the middle of something. Can I talk to you later on

tonight?

Okay.

Don't work too hard, though.

Right. Love you, babe.

The meter's running, honey.

It sounds like the meter's running.

So who was on the phone?

It's pretty important.

Hello? Would you like directions to the underworld?

Excuse me?

You called me, Jill.

How did you know my name?

The address is in the matchbook.

What the hell?

You can do this.

Another long tale about a lonely boy.

Who's grown thick and tired of the usual toy.

A man's wet and old.

Like Mai Tai?

Exactly.

My name is Adrian.

I own the underground.

I write a column for Crime Beat.

Really? Mm -hmm. We're not under investigation, are we?

No.

I, um... I would like to know, though, how did you get my number to call me

back? We have caller ID.

It's not uncommon for some people to be a little persuading to help them escape

their fears, step outside their shells, and give them to their desire.

Look, I don't mean to be rude, Adrian, but sitting in a strip bar

isn't exactly fulfilling my every desire.

It's more than a bar. It's a club.

It's a very exclusive club.

And that's what your deepest desires are, aren't? Well, that remains to be

Jill. How did you know my name?

I only have a little time for you tonight. Are you sure you want to waste

with questions like, how do you know my name?

Okay.

We'll get back to that one.

You like it?

Yeah, it's fine. Thank you.

You were saying?

I would like to know, have you ever seen this guy?

No.

Are you sure?

It's a very private club and we have a very exclusive list of clients.

I would remember.

Well, these matches were found on the body with your phone number written on

them.

That could have happened any number of ways.

One of the girls from the club could have taken the client home.

I'm sorry.

Why don't you ask the girl?

You're very persuasive.

But, if it is what your heart desires.

No, I don't care what you wear under there. If you dye your hair,

I'll make you fine.

I don't mind. I don't mind.

You're just my kind.

If you want me, well, you know where I'll be.

I'll be your lover anytime.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine.

And I'll love you anytime.

And if we set a bill there, I'm aware the handle will tear.

Before you go down below, you should know.

It's not always so.

And if you love me, will you know where I'll be?

I'll be your lover anytime.

I'll love you anytime.

I'll be your 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9.

And I'll love you.

Going to Santa Barbara.

Big meeting for merger.

Be back tomorrow evening.

Tom.

Hello?

Anybody here?

What are you doing here?

Oh, well, I knocked on the door and nobody answered.

Did you just walk in?

Well, remember you called me late last night.

How did you know that? I didn't leave a message.

I've got caller ID.

Oh, God.

I could get a block on my phone now.

I guess you better.

Well, anyway, I was worried about you, so I thought I'd come by and see if

everything was okay.

Well, I guess everything's fine, so I'm going to leave.

Detective.

Trout. Remember, everybody calls me Trout.

Okay, Trout.

Everything's not okay.

And then I woke up in my car, and that's all I can remember.

Yeah. Sounds like somebody's helped you, Mickey.

A nice big one.

Yeah, it feels like it. I mean, I keep seeing these bright, flashing lights in

front of my eyes.

Well, that'll pass.

Because the question is, why'd they do it?

Obviously, I'm on to something.

Yeah? Yeah, but what?

You sure you're telling me everything? There isn't something you might have

out?

Nothing I wanted to disclose at this time, Detective.

Why?

Well, suit yourself.

But you better be careful, you know. Sometimes they can turn around and bite

right in the ass.

Or what?

I think I'm going to go down there to that club. Check it out tonight, all

right?

In the meantime, why don't you try not to do anything stupid?

I'll try.

But I can't guarantee that.

Sorry, sir. There's a private club. Name is Ollie.

Here's my card.

Can I play?

Nobody gets there without a thought.

Oh, yeah, that's a real elegant picture. Simple. Not too overstated.

Or I do.

Sorry,

man. Nice work.

That's my favorite tie, too.

Really? Yeah.

All right, then.

B .B., I got to do something with it.

It's unbelievable.

Look at this.

Hey, pal.

Good thing you guys watered down your drinks.

Otherwise you'd never get that stain out.

How about a whiskey soda and a holy soda?

Thanks, Chief.

Hello, I'm Adrian. Are you interested in becoming a member of the club?

A member?

Yeah, I'm sure I'm interested.

Just by invitation, I'm sorry.

Oh, really?

Invitation only, huh, Adrian?

Over here in that case, why don't you invite me?

While you're out, why don't you get your operating permit too?

No,

no.

Well, let's just say that I'm a curious kind of guy, that's all.

Hurry up.

Wait a minute.

Why don't you go get it?

Now?

What's right here?

I'll do that, Adrian.

You're new around here.

Yeah, I'm actually on my honeymoon.

No, I'm kidding. I'm new. How about you?

Oh, I've been here a long time.

Yeah? Well, you, uh...

You dance like a real pro.

Thanks.

Have you had a tour of the club yet?

Tour of the club? No, I haven't.

I could give you one.

Really?

Well, right now, I can't think of anything that would make me happier.

Because there's a lot of interesting things to do and see.

Wow.

Okay, kid.

And now, why don't you lead the way?

What do we have going on down here?

What's your pleasure?

Oh, no, pretty average guy.

I don't mind watching a little rough stuff every now and then.

Oh, F &L?

Pro wrestling.

You're cute.

What is it?

It's about giving yourself over to your every passion.

Passion. How about that?

No.

I think I'm ready for the rest of the tour.

I know what you mean.

Leaving so soon?

Leaving? No, no, no, we're...

Just taking the 10 -pound tour, right?

Enjoy yourself.

It's worth every penny.

What do you suppose goes on in here?

Whatever you want.

Whatever I want?

Your word is my command.

How do you want me?

Like this?

Or... Like this?

Or you could tie me up.

So I couldn't try to stop anything you might want to do to me.

Tough decision.

So I take it that this is the end of the tour, huh?

This is the beginning.

I don't mean to intrude.

What took you so long? I've been waiting.

Samantha, you're needed out front.

Nice kid.

Very accommodating.

A little enthusiastic.

My permit.

No, it's okay. I trust you.

It is reassuring.

Is there anything else I can do for you?

Yeah.

Show me the damn door.

Hello? That's me, Trout.

I'm outside the underworld.

What happened?

Well, I think it's safe to say it's one freaky place.

I told you.

Are you in any danger?

No, no, I'm outside now, but there was a moment when I was inside that made me

very nervous.

So what do you think?

Well, it's safe to say there's a bunch of weird shit going on in there, but I

don't know if anything's illegal or not.

If you don't want to press charges, I'm not interested in getting involved, you

know. I'm a homicide. You need a vice squad now.

Thanks for calling.

I'll check in with you tomorrow, okay?

Wait, wait, wait.

Let me give you a word of advice, alright?

Drop the whole thing.

Just forget about it and count yourself lucky.

I mean, these are a bunch of sex -starved, drugged -out weirdos. Don't

what they'll do to you if you try to press this thing. You got it?

Thanks for the lecture, Dad.

Yeah, well, say your prayers.

All right.

Bye.

Oh my God.

How, Jill?

What do you want?

That you're free.

Free to be the person that you've always wanted to be.

I am the person that I want to be.

Ah, but you're not. You're fighting your emotions. The dark side.

The side that's controlled by an animal lust for passion that no man can

satisfy. No man until now.

You're not human.

Don't. I'm scared.

Mmm.

Mmm.

No, I was having this weird sex dream.

Well, you have to tell me all about that when I see you. Meanwhile, get down

here to the coroner's office as fast as you can.

Okay, I'll be there in 30 minutes.

You want that story?

Make it in 15 minutes. I'll wait.

Okay, I'm here. Now what?

You're kind of pale. You feeling okay?

I'll get back to you on that.

All right.

Well, I want you to check this guy out.

No.

I'll trust your opinion.

All right.

Look here. It says here this guy has bite marks on three different parts of

body and three different artery points.

Most of his blood has taken a hike.

Just like Edward Pennington.

Yeah, just like. Now, here's the funny part.

Oh, there's the funny part?

Yeah. I saw this guy earlier than I did at the underground.

Sorry, man. Nice work.

In fact, he spilled a drink on my tie.

Good thing it wasn't mine.

I even think I saw him shagging one of the girls later on.

You think?

Yeah, we were all wearing masks. It's hard to tell.

Let's not.

Talk about the math.

No, wait, wait, wait, wait a minute. It was purely in the line of duty, trust

me.

Look, I think I know what's going on here.

But you won't believe me.

Well, I'm pretty gullible.

Try me.

Close your eyes.

What? Close them!

All right, close them.

Okay, you can look.

Okay, what's the big... What the hell happened to you?

It's a vampire bite.

Just like what's on that body.

Vampire? Did it hurt?

Of course it hurt.

I don't think this is where it ends, though.

So what do you want to do about it?

Kick their asses.

Now you're talking.

Let's go on over there and show them a little old -fashioned police brutality.

What do you say?

Well, don't you think we should get, like, silver bullets and holy water and

crosses and something?

Connor. What? Just because these weirdos put the bite on people doesn't mean

they're honest about vampires.

Get a grip.

They could be, though.

Looks

like

we missed last call.

Or they were expecting us.

I don't even think that.

Okay, I'm ready.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, hey. Be careful of that thing.

You too.

All right.

So let's say you go this way, and I'll check back there.

By myself.

You're the one who wanted the story, remember?

Not that bad.

Trout.

Trout.

Damn it.

Somebody told me that you've been a very, very bad girl.

You were very bad. The punishment isn't over yet. Oh, good.

Wow.

All right.

Alright, sister.

Your game is over. You let her go.

Oh.

Oh no.

Stop! Stop!

Me. Show's over.

Get your hands up.

Now!

Chill. Come on, get yourself together.

Getting out of here.

Be careful, Trout. They're vampires.

I know, I know.

Well, we're leaving.

But you're not.

I'm afraid I can't allow that to happen.

Yeah.

What else you got?

Well, all right, how about a little, uh, sunrise special, huh? I didn't get 2

,000 years old by being stupid.

God damn it!

Jill? Jill!

No!

That was quick thinking.

Well, I saw it in a movie once or twice.

Let's get out of here.

Come on.

Yeah.

I'll tell you something, kid.

This is going to make one hell of a story if you ever get to write it.

Yeah. Who's going to believe it?

She will.

There's not a next afternoon night for the rope that taught the jury tongue.

Forgotten is carved on the tombstone.

There's a new breed of outlaw in town.

On four legs of fury we ride a brand.

We are the nameless and thirsty, shameless, damned and corrupt.

Draw the blood from your daughter.

boots up!