Original subtitles

that this house is possessed by spirits?

Yeah, I know. I found a bottle of bourbon in the cupboard.

No, not that kind of spirit.

I'm talking about the spirits that come out at night time and they have a sheet

and they go... Well, yeah, you're wearing a sheet.

Yeah, but I'm wearing a sheet so the ghost don't see me.

Believe me, don't you?

Yeah, yeah, sure.

Listen, will you do like that for me?

Sure.

That started jumping all over and everything.

Yeah. I was thinking about it.

I mean, it's such a cool universe.

Well, don't remind me about fucking. I mean, there's no men in this place. It's

getting so.

But it's true. We're just step sisters.

So what we're about to do is all right, right?

Thank you.

Oh,

oh oh oh

I kept your mind up and go.

Listen, honey, grab me that phone book over there.

What is the phone book doing in the bathroom?

Don't ask me. I didn't write this dumb script. I'm just reading my line.

Yeah. Well, I hope there's at least a line in the script to tell us how to get

out of this situation, you know?

Grab me that phone book. Let's see.

And the yellow page is under Exorcist.

Come on, what are you going to do? Hire somebody to teach us how to do jumping

jacks? No, silly, not exercises.

Exorcizers. Like in the Exorcist.

Oh, okay.

Right here it says, we will screw the spirits out of any mad -eating house.

We specialize in first -time encounters.

That's us for sure.

We use modern techniques and classic equipment.

Ladies, call us first because we'll never take seconds. We're the first

investors. All right. Think they can help?

God, I hope in more ways than one.

Yeah, me too. I hope so, too.

Let's go call them. All right, let's go.

That was the emerging bunch.

Come on in!

Ghosts, huh?

Yeah, you have heard of them, haven't you? Oh, we've heard of them, ma 'am.

We've heard of them.

We've seen them.

Smell them.

But the few, too.

If these spirits are on the earth, they're unfulfilled spirits.

Unfulfilled spirits?

How?

Well, lots of ways, ma 'am.

But the ones we deal with, they're primarily sexually.

Virgin, ma 'am.

You can't move on to a higher plane until you've put a few notches in that

bed coat.

The worst thing a consenting adult could do would be to try to move on without

at least having had the chance to consent.

I bet you've consented once or twice, haven't you?

Once or twice, yeah.

But you know what? Not since I've been in this house.

Well, ma 'am, you give us about an hour, and we'll have this place totally de

-spooked. De -virginized, he means.

Yeah.

You check the bathroom.

I'll take care of the bedroom.

All right. Well, come on. I'll show you the play, then.

This way?

This is the room where my sister encountered the ghost.

I mean, it's a virgin.

There's a lot of seismic activity.

What was she doing?

Humping like a bucking bronco.

Oh, yeah?

I suppose we could recreate the scene in order to draw the spirit out.

Would you be willing to... Hmm.

I suppose so.

Oh.

Follow around a bit, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Oh.

Oh yeah.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh.

You're cocky.

I love you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

um um

Okay,

daddy.

Hey!

I don't know

Thank you.

Thank you.

What are you doing?

Listening for virgins.

What do they sound like?

They squeak when they walk.

Not enough movement.

Funny, I don't hear anything.

The virgins must have found something that they like better.

What?

A man.

By himself.

Alright, I've got you where you want me.

I'm the only one that can set you free.

You talk too much.

You set me up.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Definitely feels good.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Bye.

I want to come back to mom.

Oh, dad.

Oh, come on, daddy.

Oh,

yeah.

Oh, yeah,

baby.

Thank you.

oh god oh yeah

Thank you.

She's going to come soon.

Oh, that's good.

um um

Where did you go?

I don't know Maria.

Melinda, where did you go?

Stay here, I'll find you.

I'm coming to work, Virginia.

Hard to believe, isn't it?

It's not like you should be in an X -rated video. You're not wearing a

belt. I'm not wearing one anymore.

Pretty job I've got, but I guess somebody's got to do it.

No.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

um um

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

um um

um uh

Hmm.

Yeah.