Original subtitles

- They broke into her bedroom.

She burst into song.

The inappropriate alto, tonight on sick, sad world.

- I got a big wheel rolling in my heart

- I really don't know what that's supposed to mean

- it means a lawndale morning's gonna start

- put on your pants

we're seeing more than should be seen

I'll say

- today I'll be the perfect working wife and mother

- today I'll show my clients that this man is strong

- but, oh, today's booked up like every other

- I'll probably tell my clients

that they're right and I am wrong

but still it's morning

in the burbs

- it's such a great day, I wish I could buy it

it look so good, it makes my eyeballs hurt

does this go with this top?

Should I try it?

- Oh, put on any skirt or shirt

you'd even look good wearing dirt

- thanks

on this morning

in the burbs

- oh me, oh my, a lovely day is dawning

oh, what a joy I didn't wake up dead

so I can go to school and then resume my yawning

and get my sleep in class instead of in my bed

- morning, Helen

- morning, Jake

- hair all right?

- Looks kind of fake

- great, and now my leave I'll take

it's off to work I go

- Bye. - Bye.

- What's the weather like today?

- May be a hurricane on the way

- but it's such a lovely day

- what does science know?

- Oh, that's great

the toast is cold

what tales of nothing will unfold?

Here on this same old

- this same old

morning in the burbs

- Oh, my gosh. Look at the jell-o.

- It's jiggling.

Worried about the competition?

- Don't you see?

It changed into the school colors

on pep rally day.

There really is a school spirit.

Spooky.

- Pep rally day?

- Hmm.

I guess we better make alternate plans.

- Hello, Mr. Roof.

- Um, as captain of the team,

I want to say that there are some things

more important than winning.

- Yeah, like kicking some damn butt.

Ooh! All right!

We are the champions, my friends.

- Uh, thank you. - I'm the qb.

- Whoo! - Yeah!

- Excuse me. Everybody, simmer down.

Calm down. Calm down.

That little hurricane advisory has been upgraded

to a hurricane warning.

- Are we all gonna die?

- Not on school property.

You're all to go home.

- What about the big game?

- Canceled

no

- yes, now everybody out

everybody out

an ordered quiet exit is what exiting's about

- you will not scream or howl or shout

everybody out

everybody out

but what if, what if, what if

the town blew away?

- Where would the football players play?

Where would we go to shop all day?

Would we still get three months off with pay?

If the town blew away

- nowhere isn't anywhere I want to live

- nowhere makes lawndale look all right

- nowhere is an address that's very hard to give

- when you ask for a ride home on Friday night

- I hope you're not too sad that you don't get to play

- I am, but I think the weather's fine

x files says this is just the sneaky way

the authorities create, like, a natural disaster thing

to cover up the real reason the game's canceled

I mean, big game, big storm-- coincidence?

Well, we're not falling for their line

- come on, kevie, don't be mad

I've got a way to make you glad

we'll go up to some other place

- Hey, that's cool, babe.

Let's go suck face

- hey, look at what the newspaper is saying

- what?

- It says a great big storm is on the way

- cool

- the roof's not really where we should be staying

- why?

- 'Cause this big-ass storm is happening today

- hey

what if the town blew away?

- My sister would have nowhere to stay

- the mall would be gone, and that's okay

down on your knees and begin to pray

that the town blows away

- Let's head down.

I want to live to see what this place looks like

after it's obliterated.

- You know, being a post-apocalyptic town

is gonna be cool.

Other towns will be scared of us.

- I am sure they already are.

Oh, look.

A hurricane of passion.

- Hi.

- I hate to interrupt,

but the newspaper says there's a big storm coming.

- You might want to take

your wholesome sports activities indoors.

- Wait, the newspaper said that?

Ah, man, I thought Ms. Li was just covering up.

- Yeah, she was messing with our minds.

- Why doesn't that add up for me?

- Ladies first.

- No.

Great.

Now we're not only gonna die,

"quarterback and others perish."

I always knew that I would die in nowheresville

- but I didn't think I'd die there quite so soon

hey this is like that video when scary storms kill

- will being dead wreck my afternoon?

If the town blows away

- Um, Helen, I was just wondering,

if there isn't anything more to do, you know,

I thought maybe I could go home and say good-bye

to my loved ones.

- Oh, I suppose I can send this fax myself.

- Thank you.

- Kiss the kids good-bye for me.

I mean, good night.

Damn.

- Helen, what are you doing here?

There's a hurricane coming.

I know I never said it before, but...

Helen

oh, oh, Helen

you're so swell and--

Ah, damn. I'll email you.

- Don't worry about me.

I've just got a bit of this and that to wrap up,

and then I'll be--

where's my appointment book?

- This one doesn't make so much noise.

- But, Quinn, aren't you afraid that you look like a hefty bag?

Not that you do.

- Uh-uh. - No way.

- Sorry, ladies, the store is closing.

The hurricane.

- Let's get out of here

while there's still time to walk.

Running for your life is so geeky.

- Oh, no. Wind hair.

- Come on, Quinn.

We'll come back tomorrow and find a color

that doesn't make you look so sick.

- We'll find a better color tomorrow?

Don't they know I can't leave yet?

Why don't they know?

It's easy to see

that I can't go till I'm dressed perfectly

- why don't they guess?

It's more than a quirk

I've got to confess

I'm addicted to work

- a shrink would have a field day with my head

- if he listened to the sentence I just said

obsessive kids and moms just might be ticking bombs

so I'll keep it to myself instead

- it doesn't matter really what I do or wear

- I could do a half-assed job and nobody would care

but wowing colleagues and friends

is the greatest of life's ends

so when life ends, at least it ends

with style and flair

- coming in second wouldn't be the worst

- as long as no one else was first

- oh, don't they know?

- Tell them it's so

don't they know I can't leave yet?

- Okay, mom. I'm coming home.

I'll be the one in the hefty bag.

- Hello.

You've reached the morgendorffer residence.

No one's home right now.

- What do you mean no one's home right now?

Daria! Quinn!

Please get home and answer the damn phone!

I've got a foot on the gas and a hammer in my head

thinking 'bout my girls

and the ways they might be dead

they should be safe at home and warming by the fire

instead of warming up to sing in that heavenly choir

god, god damn it

- Learn to drive, jerk!

- God, god damn it

- Glad you got your horn to work

- god, god damn it

- Stay in your Lane!

- There's a hurricane coming and I'm going insane

- quite swearing like a drunkard

and get right with the lord

- we're a very moral family with a baby on board

- and I say god, god damn it

oh me, oh my

- god, god damn it

we hope that you die

- aah, damn, damn it

- you tell 'em, Jack

- I think I see my turnoff, so you better get back

- god, god damn it

- Now, let's see.

We've got the windows taped up, emergency provisions,

spare batteries.

Oh, I wish I knew that your father and daria were safe.

Quinn, what are you doing? - Making cocoa.

- Why?

- I saw this TV movie

about this really cute family of teens

who got stranded during a hurricane.

When they got nervous, they drank cocoa.

- Now, sweetie, there is nothing to worry about.

Looters!

- Helen, Quinn. Daria?

- Oh, no, I was hoping she was with you.

- You mean she's out there in that maelstrom?

Oh, god, no!

- It's not actually raining yet, Jake.

- She's probably at a friend's house.

- Yes, yes. That's where she is.

Hello. Hello!

- Quinn, pour your father some of that cocoa.

- Hello.

No, daria's not here.

You want the morgendorffers.

God... gughhh.

I am the morgendorffers!

- Give me that.

- Hello? Trent?

You haven't seen the girls?

Are your parents there?

Are they in town at all?

Have you done anything to prepare for this hurricane?

Yes, hurricane.

Trent, I want you to come over and wait for the girls here.

You'll be safer.

Then put some on.

And get over here now, young man.

Doesn't anybody in this town wear pants anymore?

- It's like this:

If we don't go into that water tank shack

we'll blow off the roof and die.

- But it looks so...

- I believe "icky"'s the word you're groping for.

Um, Brittany, would you mind pointing those things

in another direction?

- Sorry.

Mm.

- My parents are probably starting to worry.

- I know mine would be if they were in town.

- What about Trent?

I'll bet he's upset.

- I'll bet he's snoring.

Our families and friends

- busy saving their rear ends

- may have overlooked an absent teen or two

- but by now they're catching on

that two well-liked kids are gone

- and I'll bet that someone's even missing you

so while the wind does blow

on our loved ones down below

we wish that we could tell them we're okay

- and I'd say I'm on the roof

with a bimbo and a goof

but I'm due to come back down most any day

- they must be worried

- they're probably distressed

- they must be worried

- it's causing them unrest

they must be worried

- it's really hard to guess exactly what Quinn's thinking

though my instinct says it's probably about her shoes

mom and dad, though, I don't think

are exactly tickled pink that I've vanished

and that I've left no clues

they must be worried

I wouldn't be surprised

- they must be worried

getting misty in the eyes

- they must be

worried

- Gaah! I can't take it anymore!

- Whoa. No more cocoa for you, man.

- It's not the cocoa.

The cocoa's fine. - Thanks.

- It's the sitting and doing nothing.

My little girl's lost in the middle of a hurricane.

I should be out there looking for her.

- Jake, I am sure daria had the good sense to find shelter.

There's no point in putting yourself in danger

acting like an idiot with a Superman complex.

- Damn it, Helen!

This is no time for your girly crap!

- What?

- That touchy-feely garbage.

Who do you want in an emergency,

Superman, or your damn inner child?

I'm acting like an idiot?

No-ho-ho-ho.

I'm acting like a man!

It used to be enough to be strong and good and tough

and go try whatever hasn't been tried

but now I'm a jerk with a brain that doesn't work

if I don't consult my feminine side

of what it is to be manly - manly

- maybe we should stay here and hug

would that be more manly? - manly

- oh, kill me now, I think I squashed a bug

- Trent, can't you talk some sense into him?

- He sounds sensible enough to me.

I can show that I care

I can cry, I can share

got my brain in a sensitive whirl

but please tell me why being such a modern guy

makes me feel like a bearded girl

I guess that's now manly - manly

- I do nothing, but, hey, I feel

I feel mighty manly - manly

- I'm so excited

I just might scream

- Come here, big guy.

- You got it, boss.

- I'm proud to be the home of a "y" chromosome

- I'm proud this hair is growing on my chin

- let's get the hell out there

- find those girls for who we care

we won't be back till we can bring 'em in

- we're gonna be manly - manly

- hang on, help is on the way

- it's time to be manly - manly

Honey, is that okay?

manly

- Come on, Trent.

Your daughter and my sister are out there.

- That doesn't sound right.

- And we've gotta find 'em.

It's our duty, damn it!

- Damn it, you're right.

- Damn it, let's go.

- Jakey, be careful. - Yeah, dad.

- Gotta save those girls, damn it!

- Damn it, let's do it.

Damn it!

- Um, don't look now,

but our little love nest is about to collapse.

- Oh, no. What do we do?

- I guess we're gonna have to take our chances out there.

- Okay, ready? I'm gonna open the door.

- Like before?

- Just like before.

- I give up. It's stuck.

- You give up?

You can't give up.

- The girl with the squeak says it's no time to be meek

time to do what you manly men do

she means break down the door

give a holler or a roar

make some stupid football noise and bust through

- you've got to be manly - manly

- my great aunt could do better and she's dead

- come on and be manly - manly

- now apply your mighty helmet of a head

- manly

- Did he hurt himself?

- Not anywhere either of you would notice.

- Hey, check it out.

The storm's over.

- Kevie, you did it.

- And look, Brittany, he also made a rainbow.

- Is there anything this popular boy can't do?

The big wet rainstorm's over

we're happy we're still here

the big wet rainstorm's over

the end came very near

we didn't die with Brittany

instead we got to sit and see

- Kevin's head act mightily

- Ah, babe.

The big wet rainstorm's over

the big wet rainstorm's over

Where's Quinn? - And do we care?

The big wet rainstorm's over

- she's in a store somewhere

- how do you like this Jersey top?

- Its colors make your highlights pop

- Okay, we're dressed, now we can shop

the big wet rainstorm's over

the big wet rainstorm's over

and lawndale's still the same

the big wet rainstorm's over

now life is once more tame

- though if the town were gone today

- and all the people blown away

we'd be in the majority

the big wet rainstorm's over

- the big wet rainstorm's over

I think you hurt your car

- the big wet rainstorm's over

now will you go real far away from me?

Because, you see, I crashed my car into a tree

now I'm as mad as mad can be

- the big wet rainstorm's over

- You okay?

- I'm okay. You okay?

- A-okay.

The big wet rainstorm's over

the airbag saved our life

the big wet rainstorm's over

explain this to the wife

now will you please get out and see

- the damage done by this here tree?

- This sight's a bit too much for me

the big wet rainstorm's over

- Janie.

Oh, man, you're all right.

- Trent. You were worried.

- And you're okay, too, daria.

Cool.

- Hmm. I'm fine.

- Daria, you're safe!

- Dad, you crashed the car.

- I don't care a thing about my smashed-up Lexus

you're really what my caring's all about

- that must be why you've crushed my solar plexus

- I'm sorry, hon

but I'm so happy I could shout

- so you found my sis at last

- crashed the car

- ah, the past is past

- at least you didn't break your neck

- could have though

- but what the heck

'cause today was strange in extremes

and that's put lightly

and yet it started out so dull and pretty dumb

and so this feeling I feel I don't feel slightly

it's the hope that tomorrow will come

and another weird morning

- yes, a dawning

- an exciting new day aborning

no need for a surgeon general's warning

morning, morning

it's morning, morning

morning in the burbs

- it used to be enough to be strong and good and tough

and go try whatever hasn't been tried

but now I'm a jerk with a brain that doesn't work

if I don't first consult my feminine side

of what it is to be manly

maybe we should stay here and hug

would that be more manly?

Oh, kill me now, I think I squashed a bug

Trent, can't you talk some sense into him?

He sounds sensible enough to me.

We're gonna be manly

hang on, help is on the way

it's time to be manly

honey, is that okay?

Manly