Original subtitles

What are you doing?

Lab planning. Wow, what's up?

Do you think you should be studying or something?

It's the weekend. Why would I be studying?

Well, I mean, maybe get a little extra time cracking the books. I don't need

My grades are perfectly fine.

Yeah, I know, because you're a smart one. That's why Mom and Dad sent you to

college and I got to work.

Yeah, no shit.

So your grades are fine?

Yeah, they should be perfectly fine.

Well, as you know, I only have a high school education.

Uh -huh. So could you explain the term academic suspension to me?

Use small words because I'm pretty fucking stupid.

Wow.

You should not be getting into my mail. That's actually a federal offense.

It's sent to this address.

I live here.

Sent to this address, but is it addressed specifically to you? It

residents. You're right.

You're right. It was addressed to mom and dad because they were paid with

tuition.

So, I guess mom and dad will punish me, and I guess I could treat you to KPI.

So I should go ahead and give this to dad?

No, you shouldn't.

You sure? It feels like the right thing to do. But I mean, I haven't taken my

ethics classes. You don't know what the right thing to do is.

You're not that bright.

So what should I do with this?

You should tear that up.

Put it in the shredder.

Now I'm not good at thinking, but I might have to think about that.

No.

So what have you been doing in college all this time?

I've been doing my classes.

You've been doing your classes or you've been, like, doing Fat Boys?

Maybe both.

Yeah. See, like, Mom and Dad never, like, caught on to, like, the fact that

you're the biggest star in school.

Because you have, like, the grades and your dad is a princess. But, you know, I

didn't even know.

Maybe.

Some night.

Why would I fucking show you, pervert?

You're my brother. That's not right.

If I can calculate, this is the you -do -what -I -fucking -tell -you -to. You're

a fucking jerk.

I am.

So, uh, you stand up.

Take a shot.

You're a short little fucking grass that you walk around in.

Happy?

At least all the beer you've been drinking hasn't made you fat.

I mean, I think maybe you might want to take, like, some fitness classes, but

you still look alright.

I look perfectly fine, and I don't think I need to take any fitness classes.

Thank you very much.

Well, maybe you'd at least be able to get paid in one of those.

So, is this just, you just do underwear? Because I'm pretty sure

from what I've seen in those movies about people tossing girls' shit in

No. No. Fuck no.

You're not seeing my fucking tits.

Well, I mean, I've seen them. You just didn't know.

I just think you're in front of you.

What the fuck is wrong with you?

I don't know. Get a degree and figure it out.

So, just to recap, what does this mean again?

That needs to be shredded.

That needs to be fucking shredded.

I think it means I get to see our tits.

Fucking me.

Okay, what the fuck ever. But you better fucking shred that.

Understood?

Not that many

people. God.

No,

you said you wanted to look.

A little, yeah.

I'm not.

Yeah, I'm fucking sure I'm not pregnant.

I would know better.

I know my body better than that.

No.

No.

Are you fucking kidding me?

You're not going to see anymore. This is enough.

Imagine if I didn't play your kids and you still get fucking thrown out of the

house.

Fine.

Don't be shy.

I'm going to strut it like you did in school.

Different. How many walks this year have you done?

That's none of your fucking business.

Yeah. I'm surprised you're not like a common hanging out here pussy.

Well, you use those at least, right?

Maybe.

Even barebacking?

God, you dirty slut.

That's good to know, though.

Why is that good to know?

So, um, let's move those hands.

So, maybe if you, like, learn how to just take care of yourself, you'll never

get partying.

I do take care of myself.

Do you?

Do you know what I mean?

I think so.

Maybe you're not doing it right if you don't run around following these track

books, because you're just cheating them all.

I'm sure I'm doing it right.

Well, you know...

I'm not really sure your judgment can be trusted.

Please stop waving that in my fucking face. Oh,

bullshit.

You don't have any degrees.

Now,

since you're like one

more bad grade away from being like a stripper.

Give me a little show.

Give you a little show?

Yeah, give me a nice little hustle spread.

No. No.

I can't do that. This is fucking weird.

You're a fucking pervert.

Yeah, that's why you, like, love to walk around in little dresses when it's just

me and you home.

And, like, ooh, you didn't know I was home. You're laying out topless by the

pool. Dude. You've been trying to fucking ask me this for, like, the last

years. No, I haven't.

Sit back.

Spread your legs.

You look a little naked like a mermaid.

Take your glasses off, because you're not wearing any work at the strip club.

Shut the fuck up, you asshole.

I want to touch it a little bit.

No.

Quit pushing this so far.

We're going to go a little further. Go ahead.

How much further?

I don't know. Do a great job, I guess.

That's probably a little bit.

It puts you in a good mood.

God, this is so wrong.

This is not fun.

Can I stop yet?

Well, you haven't, like, kind of done a good job at it yet.

Dude, this is awkward.

Alright, just pretend I'm, like...

I love you.

I don't think so.

Just do it like you really do it.

I'm trying. It's kind of hard with you watching.

It's pretty awkward. I don't see how you can be an OSU pervert.

I don't think I'm that wild I'm not that wild

Well, it's not that you're wild, but I mean, maybe you just can't resist a

I can resist.

Really?

Why don't you just jerk it for me?

Really?

That good?

Happy about that?

I think you can do better.

You should just be happier getting it.

Put some spit on it or something.

Dude, you're selfish.

Happy?

I think you'll know what happens when I'm happy. I'm sure you learned that in

college.

Well, it's already hard, so you're already happy.

You're not really that good with your hands, are you?

I'm perfectly fine with my hands. I just don't care how much you get pleased.

But you're going to be doing this like all day.

Well, you know what? I have a better idea.

Instead of like running your mouth, why don't you use your mouth?

Really?

Really, dude?

Or you could be fucking homeless when mom and dad kick you out.

That's why you don't use your hands.

I'm going to fuck you, don't you?

No.

No? No.

All right, I'll make you a deal.

If your pussy's not super wet right now, then I'll leave you alone.

But if it is, then you're exactly the kind of slut. Mm -hmm.

I got to stick it right in.

Exactly the kind of slut.

Oh my god!

haven't been fucking you right.

a better fucking swallowing. What the fuck have you learned in college?

Are you fucking kidding me? Why the fuck would you come in my mouth?

Well, I'm not coming in your pussy.

You're probably in my fucking birth control.

Fucking asshole.

Well, why don't you go study? Get those grades up.

Okay? Okay.

You better shred that fucking paper.

Mm -hmm. We'll see what the next letter from the cops says.