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1
00:00:34,479 --> 00:00:38,849
Hare Krishna. Hare Krishna.
Hare Krishna. Hare Krishna.
2
00:00:38,975 --> 00:00:43,239
Hare Krishna. Hare Krishna.
Hare Krishna. Hare Krishna.
3
00:00:43,407 --> 00:00:47,949
Hare Krishna. Hare Krishna.
Hare Krishna. Hare Krishna.
4
00:00:48,119 --> 00:00:53,325
Hare Krishna. Hare Krishna.
Hare Krishna. Come on.
5
00:00:53,498 --> 00:00:56,501
Hare Krishna. Hare Krishna.
Hare Krishna.
6
00:00:56,670 --> 00:00:59,790
Keep it together. Hare Krishna.
Hare Krishna.
7
00:00:59,964 --> 00:01:02,836
Hare Krishna. Hare Krishna.
8
00:01:03,009 --> 00:01:05,583
Hare Kr... No.
9
00:01:05,761 --> 00:01:09,049
A heartbreaking loss for Hare Krishna.
10
00:01:59,654 --> 00:02:02,988
- Give me a 1-5-6, a 1-5-7, and a...
- Give me a break, will you?
11
00:02:03,157 --> 00:02:05,649
You can't bet every horse.
It's cheating.
12
00:02:06,118 --> 00:02:08,988
- Give me the tickets.
- We're gonna get shut out.
13
00:02:09,162 --> 00:02:13,326
I've got a sure winner.
$ 10 across the board on number 2.
14
00:02:13,500 --> 00:02:15,292
At 70-to-1?
15
00:02:15,461 --> 00:02:17,787
Charlie, where's the money?
16
00:02:18,173 --> 00:02:20,841
If I had the money, would I be betting
long shots?
17
00:02:21,008 --> 00:02:23,335
Please, Edie, cover for me
this one time.
18
00:02:25,514 --> 00:02:27,257
Okay, Charlie. You're down.
19
00:02:27,431 --> 00:02:29,805
Thank you, sweetheart.
I love you very much.
20
00:02:33,396 --> 00:02:37,063
A pretty good start.The only one slow is High Button Shoes.
21
00:02:37,234 --> 00:02:39,939
And High Button Shoes is last,early on.
22
00:02:40,111 --> 00:02:44,442
Swinging onto the back stretch,it's Last Chance setting the pace.
23
00:02:44,617 --> 00:02:47,071
High Button Shoes does beginto pick it up.
24
00:02:47,243 --> 00:02:52,073
High Button Shoes now joins the packas they swing onto the last stretch.
25
00:02:52,251 --> 00:02:55,951
High Button Shoes.
High Button Shoes.
26
00:02:56,588 --> 00:02:59,754
- High Button Shoes. High Button Shoes.
- High Button Shoes...
27
00:03:02,177 --> 00:03:05,547
High Button Shoes.
High Button Shoes!
28
00:03:05,723 --> 00:03:08,512
High Button Shoes.
High Button Shoes!
29
00:03:08,727 --> 00:03:11,134
Come on, you schmuck! Move!
30
00:03:11,437 --> 00:03:13,929
You got it, kid! You got it!
31
00:03:14,148 --> 00:03:15,941
That's the way to do it!
32
00:03:16,152 --> 00:03:19,733
High Button Shoes!
High Button Shoes!
33
00:03:19,946 --> 00:03:22,485
You got it, baby!
34
00:03:22,949 --> 00:03:25,701
High Button Shoes has won!
35
00:03:26,828 --> 00:03:28,406
I love you too.
36
00:03:28,580 --> 00:03:32,625
See you later, sweetheart.
Hi, how you doing?
37
00:03:34,961 --> 00:03:37,369
Looks like you're having a big day, huh?
38
00:03:37,922 --> 00:03:39,419
Mickey, my favorite bookie.
39
00:03:39,593 --> 00:03:41,919
- How's business?
- I'll tell you, Charlie.
40
00:03:42,095 --> 00:03:45,131
- I'm in a tough racket.
- Yeah. I know what you mean.
41
00:03:45,307 --> 00:03:46,718
Well, I gotta see somebo...
42
00:03:46,933 --> 00:03:52,640
Sometimes, I get this terrible feeling
like people are trying to avoid me.
43
00:03:52,815 --> 00:03:54,440
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
44
00:03:54,609 --> 00:03:57,312
That's too bad. You should see
someone about that.
45
00:03:57,486 --> 00:04:00,025
- I am seeing someone.
- Who?
46
00:04:00,197 --> 00:04:02,273
- Where's my money, Charlie?
- Money?
47
00:04:02,448 --> 00:04:06,661
Come on, I'm broke, Mickey. You'll be
the first to know when I get money...
48
00:04:06,830 --> 00:04:09,665
Oh, my goodness.
Where did this come from?
49
00:04:09,833 --> 00:04:14,458
I'll tell you what. I'll give you $500
and we'll call it even, all right?
50
00:04:15,379 --> 00:04:16,707
I'll tell you what.
51
00:04:16,880 --> 00:04:20,381
I'll take a grand,
and you still owe me three grand.
52
00:04:26,933 --> 00:04:28,807
Three thousand.
53
00:05:17,777 --> 00:05:19,854
Always and forever, kiddo.
54
00:05:34,506 --> 00:05:36,415
Did you come to borrow money?
55
00:05:36,591 --> 00:05:38,749
Let me just say...
56
00:05:48,269 --> 00:05:51,970
Why do you assume the only reason
I come here is to borrow money?
57
00:05:52,149 --> 00:05:54,984
Because every time you
come here, you borrow money.
58
00:05:55,151 --> 00:05:58,602
Herbie, I'm gonna tell you something
you're not gonna believe.
59
00:05:58,823 --> 00:06:01,064
I never believe anything
that you tell me.
60
00:06:01,242 --> 00:06:03,115
Ho-ho-ho. Very funny.
61
00:06:03,369 --> 00:06:05,408
No, it's very sad.
62
00:06:07,373 --> 00:06:10,207
Not as sad as a man having dinner
with a photograph.
63
00:06:10,626 --> 00:06:13,831
Come on. I'm celebrating.
It's my 45th wedding anniversary.
64
00:06:16,550 --> 00:06:18,423
Very touching.
65
00:06:18,635 --> 00:06:21,802
Except today isn't your anniversary.
66
00:06:22,014 --> 00:06:23,424
Look, Suzie was my wife.
67
00:06:23,640 --> 00:06:26,179
- I realize that, she was my sister.
- My ann...
68
00:06:26,351 --> 00:06:30,266
- I was your best man, March 15, 1952.
- Correct.
69
00:06:30,480 --> 00:06:33,850
Except today is the 16th.
70
00:06:34,068 --> 00:06:36,523
- Impossible.
- Why? That's the way it works.
71
00:06:36,695 --> 00:06:39,651
First, you get the 15th,
then after that is the 16th.
72
00:06:39,825 --> 00:06:41,697
And then later on comes the 17th.
73
00:06:42,159 --> 00:06:45,694
Here. Take a look at the date.
74
00:06:47,747 --> 00:06:49,661
Sixteen...
75
00:06:49,836 --> 00:06:52,837
God, I've blown my own anniversary.
76
00:06:58,760 --> 00:07:00,172
I'm sorry, kiddo.
77
00:07:02,138 --> 00:07:05,390
- There.
- What the hell...?
78
00:07:05,560 --> 00:07:09,344
If you need clothes, the Salvation Army's
over on Fourth Street.
79
00:07:09,522 --> 00:07:12,357
- These will be perfect.
- What are...? Perfect for what?
80
00:07:12,525 --> 00:07:16,654
Will you do me a favor? I worked
in a department store for half of my life.
81
00:07:16,821 --> 00:07:19,941
If you don't buy something,
you put it back.
82
00:07:20,201 --> 00:07:21,528
Herbie...
83
00:07:22,578 --> 00:07:24,948
- ...happy anniversary.
- That was yesterday.
84
00:07:25,121 --> 00:07:26,616
Go ahead, open it.
85
00:07:32,797 --> 00:07:37,625
"Mexico and the Yucatán. Witness
the spectacle of a rare solar eclipse...
86
00:07:37,843 --> 00:07:39,883
...from the Mayan Pyramids."
87
00:07:40,054 --> 00:07:41,549
- This is a cruise.
- Right.
88
00:07:41,765 --> 00:07:45,299
- Deluxe accommodations, see?
- All right, where'd you get these?
89
00:07:45,644 --> 00:07:47,221
Remember a guy named No-Neck?
90
00:07:47,686 --> 00:07:49,844
Well, they finally busted him.
91
00:07:50,481 --> 00:07:52,853
He gave me these in lieu of
cash he owed me.
92
00:07:53,236 --> 00:07:55,774
Now, wait a minute.
Somebody owed you money?
93
00:07:55,947 --> 00:07:57,736
How dumb do you think I am?
94
00:07:59,074 --> 00:08:02,940
What are you gonna do? Stay cooped up
in this mausoleum you call home?
95
00:08:03,161 --> 00:08:06,579
- You're still alive. Did anybody tell you?
- Look who's talking.
96
00:08:06,750 --> 00:08:08,874
Damn right, "Look who's talking."
97
00:08:09,043 --> 00:08:12,210
- Don't you get tired of being alone?
- No, the answer's no.
98
00:08:12,463 --> 00:08:16,414
- Gourmet food, free drinks.
- No. No.
99
00:08:16,592 --> 00:08:18,251
A bevy of pretty broads.
100
00:08:18,427 --> 00:08:20,837
You're looking for a meaningful
relationship.
101
00:08:21,015 --> 00:08:23,422
- Why not?
- You've never had one in your life.
102
00:08:23,601 --> 00:08:26,008
I got news for you.
My life isn't over yet...
103
00:08:26,187 --> 00:08:29,970
...which is why I suggest we get on
that ship and sip champagne...
104
00:08:30,148 --> 00:08:32,438
...with some lonely, rich broads.
105
00:08:33,236 --> 00:08:37,814
Who knows?
We may get lucky during the eclipse.
106
00:08:38,657 --> 00:08:41,494
Charlie, hear me:
107
00:08:41,661 --> 00:08:43,784
The answer is no.
108
00:08:44,332 --> 00:08:46,621
Hold it. Hold it. Coming through.
109
00:08:46,793 --> 00:08:49,200
Two customers.
110
00:08:49,377 --> 00:08:51,169
Made it just in time.
111
00:08:51,337 --> 00:08:55,038
- Herbie, come this way.
- It's the wrong section.
112
00:08:55,217 --> 00:08:58,005
- This looks like our seats.
- Those are first-class.
113
00:08:58,179 --> 00:09:00,006
What's the matter?
We're not first-class?
114
00:09:00,180 --> 00:09:03,679
- But our boarding things say...
- I don't care what they say.
115
00:09:03,851 --> 00:09:05,428
- Will you sit down?
- But wait.
116
00:09:05,602 --> 00:09:10,680
- These could belong to somebody else.
- Relax, will you? The doors are closed.
117
00:09:10,859 --> 00:09:14,394
We're not gonna be stopping
on 34th Street to pick up passengers.
118
00:09:14,572 --> 00:09:15,899
Okay, Charlie.
119
00:09:16,113 --> 00:09:18,200
Thank you.
120
00:09:18,742 --> 00:09:20,485
- Thank you.
- Thank you very much.
121
00:09:23,915 --> 00:09:27,960
- I may become a frequent flier.
- Damn good mimosa.
122
00:09:28,127 --> 00:09:30,168
Yeah, here's to good living, kid.
123
00:09:30,797 --> 00:09:33,168
Okay, okay. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
124
00:09:33,548 --> 00:09:39,586
Okay. Thank you very much. Okay, now
begins the first leg of our honeymoon.
125
00:09:39,806 --> 00:09:41,348
Only a year late.
126
00:09:41,514 --> 00:09:45,465
I'd like to make a small bet
on where they're gonna be sitting.
127
00:09:45,644 --> 00:09:47,604
It's Mom. Say hi, Mom.
128
00:09:47,815 --> 00:09:52,107
- Stop it, will you, Allan?
- And my beautiful bride.
129
00:09:52,819 --> 00:09:54,728
Let me see here.
130
00:09:59,744 --> 00:10:02,865
Excuse me. I believe
you're sitting in our seats.
131
00:10:03,082 --> 00:10:06,615
- Yeah, that figures.
- I'm sorry.
132
00:10:06,793 --> 00:10:09,331
That's all right, I'm sorry.
See what you do?
133
00:10:09,504 --> 00:10:12,753
- May I see your boarding passes?
- Actually, it's my fault.
134
00:10:12,966 --> 00:10:17,260
The doctor here thought it'd be best if
I weren't subjected to the stress...
135
00:10:17,428 --> 00:10:20,098
- ...of economy class.
- Thirty-seven H and J.
136
00:10:20,307 --> 00:10:23,011
You gentlemen will have to pay
for these drinks.
137
00:10:23,476 --> 00:10:25,266
Maybe Blue Cross could cover it.
138
00:10:25,477 --> 00:10:27,353
That's good.
139
00:10:27,523 --> 00:10:31,817
That's very funny, ma'am. Very witty.
140
00:10:39,661 --> 00:10:40,704
Hey.
141
00:10:41,955 --> 00:10:45,537
Aren't those the seats they use
for transporting convicted felons?
142
00:10:45,875 --> 00:10:47,536
Herbie, sit down.
143
00:10:47,836 --> 00:10:49,460
You're scaring the kids.
144
00:11:00,723 --> 00:11:05,102
We'll begin our nonstopexpress service to Miami, Florida.
145
00:11:05,271 --> 00:11:08,058
Our flight time will beapproximately five hours.
146
00:11:16,031 --> 00:11:19,284
Welcome aboardthe beautiful M.S. Westerdam.
147
00:11:19,620 --> 00:11:23,748
Your cabin stewards are happy to meetany special needs you may have.
148
00:11:23,916 --> 00:11:26,751
- Don 't hesitate to ask for assistance.
- Boy, oh, boy.
149
00:11:26,918 --> 00:11:30,253
And please note, there will be a
compulsory lifeboat drill...
150
00:11:30,423 --> 00:11:33,542
- ...today at 5:30 p.m.
- Mr. Lee, back again.
151
00:11:33,717 --> 00:11:36,125
Nice to see you
and the lovely missus.
152
00:11:36,304 --> 00:11:38,924
Oh, no, it's someone else, isn't it?
Hello.
153
00:11:39,096 --> 00:11:41,340
I'd like you to meet my dance hosts.
Mac.
154
00:11:41,517 --> 00:11:42,893
- Hello.
- Jonathan.
155
00:11:43,436 --> 00:11:45,104
Come on.
156
00:11:47,900 --> 00:11:51,600
Herbie, listen to me. I wanted to tell you
something before you...
157
00:11:51,778 --> 00:11:54,567
- Herbie...
- Oh, wow.
158
00:11:55,992 --> 00:11:57,487
Man, I tell you something.
159
00:11:57,661 --> 00:12:00,863
When they say "deluxe accommodations,"
they mean deluxe.
160
00:12:01,038 --> 00:12:04,121
Well, Herbie, "deluxe" can mean
several different things.
161
00:12:04,291 --> 00:12:07,793
For example, in a diner,
"deluxe" means "comes with fries."
162
00:12:09,631 --> 00:12:15,172
This is it. Oh, Ma!
This is gorgeous. What a suite.
163
00:12:15,345 --> 00:12:17,918
- Oh. Hi.
- Hello, ladies.
164
00:12:18,139 --> 00:12:21,841
I want those small pieces in the
bedroom. Who the hell are you?
165
00:12:22,019 --> 00:12:24,509
Lizzy, get a load of slouchy here.
166
00:12:24,688 --> 00:12:26,432
Does he come with the stateroom?
167
00:12:26,649 --> 00:12:29,187
Mom, where's your hospitality?
168
00:12:29,776 --> 00:12:33,562
Now, listen.
I have been on a plane for three hours.
169
00:12:33,740 --> 00:12:36,444
I have been in a taxicab
for an hour-and-a-half.
170
00:12:36,659 --> 00:12:38,570
I need to take a crap and a nap...
171
00:12:38,745 --> 00:12:40,904
...and I do not need an audience.
172
00:12:41,124 --> 00:12:43,162
Sounds like a party we can miss.
173
00:12:43,333 --> 00:12:46,667
- We'll see you later, ladies.
- Bye, now.
174
00:12:47,671 --> 00:12:50,126
Boy. Did you see
the chassis on that broad?
175
00:12:50,298 --> 00:12:52,788
I'll bet she's worth a few mil.
176
00:12:52,967 --> 00:12:56,467
This must be wrong. I mean, why would
they have us way down here?
177
00:12:56,637 --> 00:13:00,804
I like it down here. Gives us a chance
to get away from the commotion up top.
178
00:13:00,977 --> 00:13:03,053
Like the other passengers
and the view?
179
00:13:03,229 --> 00:13:04,772
- This is us.
- Listen to me.
180
00:13:04,940 --> 00:13:09,102
I've been meaning to tell you something.
Before you go into the room, listen.
181
00:13:19,538 --> 00:13:22,787
- Cozy, isn't it?
- It's wha...? It's "cozy"?
182
00:13:22,956 --> 00:13:26,162
A good fart will give you a concussion.
183
00:13:26,338 --> 00:13:29,041
Needs a little daylight.
184
00:13:42,771 --> 00:13:46,389
Herb, this is the best possible thing
that could've happened.
185
00:13:46,567 --> 00:13:48,440
I can't wait to hear why.
186
00:13:48,610 --> 00:13:50,105
- As dance hosts...
- What?
187
00:13:50,279 --> 00:13:54,111
...it's actually our job to flirt
with all the classy broads.
188
00:13:54,283 --> 00:13:55,692
What? Dance hosts?
189
00:13:55,909 --> 00:13:58,662
Yeah, that's how I was able
to afford the tickets.
190
00:13:58,829 --> 00:14:02,329
Instead of paying for the cruise,
I signed us up as dance hosts.
191
00:14:02,500 --> 00:14:05,287
- The cruise is free.
- What do you mean, you idiot?
192
00:14:05,461 --> 00:14:07,454
- We're working!
- We're not working.
193
00:14:07,630 --> 00:14:09,207
We're dancing and cavorting.
194
00:14:09,423 --> 00:14:11,879
You moron. You don't even know
how to dance.
195
00:14:12,384 --> 00:14:14,294
That's why I brought you here.
196
00:14:18,059 --> 00:14:20,763
- Perhaps we're interrupting you.
- Welcome aboard.
197
00:14:21,353 --> 00:14:24,769
We share the bathroom. This is
Jonathan Deveraux. I'm Mac Vela.
198
00:14:24,940 --> 00:14:28,357
USMC retired.
I'll be your liaison to the CD.
199
00:14:28,528 --> 00:14:32,572
- The what D?
- Cruise director. Gil Godwyn?
200
00:14:32,782 --> 00:14:35,985
Too bad you got Gil for your first gig.
He's a real prick.
201
00:14:36,161 --> 00:14:38,070
- Control freak.
- Frigging Nazi.
202
00:14:38,245 --> 00:14:40,405
- Classic megalomaniac.
- Not a nice man.
203
00:14:41,875 --> 00:14:44,626
If you have any questions, feel free.
204
00:14:44,836 --> 00:14:48,087
I got one question.
What's the fastest route off this ship?
205
00:14:53,595 --> 00:14:55,007
Excuse me.
206
00:15:21,417 --> 00:15:22,667
Hello.
207
00:15:26,546 --> 00:15:28,420
Okay, chief. Pull the gangway in.
208
00:15:28,590 --> 00:15:31,842
All visitors should now be ashore.
209
00:15:32,012 --> 00:15:35,096
Last call, please.All visitors should now be ashore.
210
00:15:35,808 --> 00:15:36,922
Pardon me.
211
00:15:38,603 --> 00:15:39,644
Oh!
212
00:15:42,146 --> 00:15:43,642
Oh, my God.
213
00:15:43,816 --> 00:15:46,223
- Sir, are you okay?
- Yeah, I think.
214
00:15:46,444 --> 00:15:49,066
- There you go. You sure?
- Thank you, yeah.
215
00:15:50,113 --> 00:15:52,570
- God, that's embarrassing.
- Only for you.
216
00:15:54,326 --> 00:15:56,616
- Oh, my God!
- What?
217
00:15:56,829 --> 00:15:58,870
The ship's moving.
218
00:15:59,083 --> 00:16:02,082
- Ships are known to do that.
- But I need that gangplank.
219
00:16:02,293 --> 00:16:04,251
Please! Hello! Major! Somebody!
220
00:16:04,463 --> 00:16:05,920
I gotta use that sucker!
221
00:16:06,129 --> 00:16:08,087
I've gotta... I've got... Hello!
222
00:16:08,256 --> 00:16:11,260
Now, where the hell did they go
with my luggage?
223
00:16:11,429 --> 00:16:12,969
God almighty.
224
00:16:13,138 --> 00:16:15,712
Thank you very much.
What's the matter with you?
225
00:16:15,891 --> 00:16:18,381
- Got a problem?
- Not really.
226
00:16:18,559 --> 00:16:21,016
I always cry at sailings.
227
00:16:21,188 --> 00:16:22,649
They're so romantic.
228
00:16:23,066 --> 00:16:24,441
Oh, yeah.
229
00:16:42,753 --> 00:16:46,250
Join your cruise staff bythe lido pool on the upper promenade...
230
00:16:46,422 --> 00:16:49,425
... deck aft for the gala sail away...
231
00:16:53,931 --> 00:16:59,970
Herbie, I know you're upset now,
but in a few days you'll be thanking me.
232
00:17:00,147 --> 00:17:03,561
Listen, Charlie, what is in this for you?
233
00:17:03,732 --> 00:17:07,066
Now tell me, and no shit,
because I'm too tired.
234
00:17:08,698 --> 00:17:12,991
Okay, fine. Remember my old pal Tony?
Tony?
235
00:17:13,160 --> 00:17:14,987
- Anthony Caldoni?
- Yeah.
236
00:17:15,163 --> 00:17:16,406
Yeah, the mail-fraud guy.
237
00:17:16,578 --> 00:17:19,249
First of all, those charges
were dropped.
238
00:17:19,706 --> 00:17:23,658
- But guess what he's doing today.
- I don't give a rat's ass.
239
00:17:23,836 --> 00:17:27,706
So happens, he's married to one
of the richest broads in Palm Beach.
240
00:17:27,885 --> 00:17:29,379
And guess how they met.
241
00:17:29,552 --> 00:17:31,545
One, two, cha-cha-cha.
242
00:17:31,721 --> 00:17:34,212
- One, two...
- No way, José.
243
00:17:34,390 --> 00:17:37,640
Wake me at the first port of call.
That's where I get off.
244
00:17:37,811 --> 00:17:40,267
- I hate to see you do this.
- Why is that?
245
00:17:40,440 --> 00:17:43,605
Because if you don't dance
you lose your employee status...
246
00:17:43,775 --> 00:17:47,309
...and that means you gotta pay.
That's 2500 smackeroonies.
247
00:17:47,486 --> 00:17:50,940
You son of a bitch! You're the one
who should be paying!
248
00:17:51,533 --> 00:17:55,782
Would the dance hostsplease report to the main ballroom?
249
00:17:55,955 --> 00:17:57,781
They're playing our song.
250
00:18:27,404 --> 00:18:29,233
Very nice hair.
251
00:18:29,408 --> 00:18:32,990
Right. Nails? Cut them. Let me.
252
00:18:33,203 --> 00:18:36,702
Thank you. Excellent, Mac.
253
00:18:36,872 --> 00:18:39,494
Jonathan, clip the ear hair.
254
00:18:39,668 --> 00:18:43,252
- I beg your pardon?
- Ear hair.
255
00:18:45,799 --> 00:18:48,884
I'm very skeptical of dance hosts
who can't keep time.
256
00:18:49,053 --> 00:18:52,303
- Mister...?
- Me? Sullivan, Herb.
257
00:18:52,472 --> 00:18:55,344
- And that's Gordon, Charles.
- Lovely.
258
00:18:55,518 --> 00:18:59,600
Sorry we're late,
but it's a very big boat.
259
00:19:00,106 --> 00:19:04,234
This boat happens to be
the flagship vessel...
260
00:19:04,402 --> 00:19:08,317
...of the world's premier cruise line.
And I am the cruise director.
261
00:19:08,532 --> 00:19:10,357
Sir. Yes, sir.
262
00:19:10,616 --> 00:19:12,942
I've a feeling you're
going to be trouble.
263
00:19:13,161 --> 00:19:16,744
- Oh...
- No, we're not. We're pussycats.
264
00:19:16,957 --> 00:19:18,368
For your sake, I hope...
265
00:19:22,839 --> 00:19:25,508
Is that cologne or Armor All?
266
00:19:25,675 --> 00:19:29,803
That's close. Close, it's cologne,
but I bought it at a gas station.
267
00:19:30,722 --> 00:19:32,550
I've got my eye on you.
268
00:19:32,809 --> 00:19:34,267
You're not so bad yourself.
269
00:19:37,312 --> 00:19:38,640
- All right.
- Fuck you.
270
00:19:39,941 --> 00:19:41,647
We're 30 seconds from intros.
271
00:19:41,815 --> 00:19:45,482
Now, remember that you are
the representatives of this ship...
272
00:19:45,655 --> 00:19:50,482
...and will, at all times,
behave in a manner appropriate thereto.
273
00:19:50,784 --> 00:19:55,661
You will be courteous and respectful
at all times, and when the music stops...
274
00:19:55,832 --> 00:19:59,201
...you will escort your partner
back to her seat.
275
00:19:59,503 --> 00:20:06,087
Above all, you will not fraternize
privately with the guests at any time.
276
00:20:06,260 --> 00:20:09,295
If you do, it's grounds
for immediate dismissal.
277
00:20:09,679 --> 00:20:13,547
- Permission to speak, sir?
- Denied. Mac, mike.
278
00:20:14,809 --> 00:20:16,886
- Who's Mac Mike?
- I don't know.
279
00:20:25,530 --> 00:20:26,728
Oh, yes.
280
00:20:28,532 --> 00:20:32,909
Ladies and gentlemen,
the M.S. Westerdam proudly presents...
281
00:20:33,120 --> 00:20:35,030
...your cruise director...
282
00:20:35,248 --> 00:20:41,334
...the very talented Mr. Gil Godwyn!
283
00:20:41,505 --> 00:20:42,833
Thank you!
284
00:20:43,006 --> 00:20:45,674
Can't believe it.
He actually opens for himself.
285
00:20:45,884 --> 00:20:50,630
Thank you so very much.
Aren't they absolutely marvelous?
286
00:20:50,849 --> 00:20:52,426
Thank you. Thank you.
287
00:20:52,767 --> 00:20:54,676
- Very good. Very good.
- Thank you.
288
00:20:54,893 --> 00:20:56,768
- Good. Very good.
- Magnificent.
289
00:20:56,939 --> 00:20:59,013
Moving experience.
290
00:21:30,015 --> 00:21:31,888
Thank you so much.
291
00:21:32,100 --> 00:21:34,971
You're too kind, really.
Thank you, girls.
292
00:21:35,478 --> 00:21:38,479
What could his parents
have possibly done to him?
293
00:21:39,232 --> 00:21:43,146
Now, ladies and gentlemen,
I'd like to introduce our dance hosts.
294
00:21:43,320 --> 00:21:44,362
Mac.
295
00:21:46,323 --> 00:21:49,277
Jonathan. Bill.
296
00:21:49,493 --> 00:21:50,608
How do you like him?
297
00:21:50,785 --> 00:21:52,246
- He's too short.
- Oh.
298
00:21:52,622 --> 00:21:56,240
- Julio. Bobby.
- Oh me, me!
299
00:21:56,418 --> 00:22:02,586
Scott. Herb.
And Ch... Cha... Ch... Charlie!
300
00:22:02,799 --> 00:22:04,541
Hey, Charlie.
301
00:22:08,054 --> 00:22:09,096
Charlie.
302
00:22:09,305 --> 00:22:11,678
- That guy Herb is cute.
- Uh-huh.
303
00:22:28,493 --> 00:22:31,032
Let's get them while they're hot.
304
00:22:32,080 --> 00:22:33,408
Just an expression.
305
00:22:44,760 --> 00:22:46,634
Just like the beach at Normandy.
306
00:22:46,846 --> 00:22:49,929
Gentlemen, I didn't hire you
to be wallflowers.
307
00:22:50,099 --> 00:22:53,183
I don't want anyone on my ship
ever to feel ignored.
308
00:22:53,352 --> 00:22:56,354
Mrs. Carruthers,
may I have the great pleasure?
309
00:22:59,942 --> 00:23:01,272
Kiss-ass.
310
00:23:10,831 --> 00:23:12,157
Take it, fellas.
311
00:23:12,372 --> 00:23:15,457
- I'm Mac. Welcome aboard.
- Thank you, Mac.
312
00:23:19,963 --> 00:23:22,372
Where are you going?
313
00:23:22,550 --> 00:23:27,295
Taking on a lot of water
in the forward compartment, sir.
314
00:23:27,472 --> 00:23:30,887
God. You have two minutes. Go.
315
00:23:37,857 --> 00:23:40,480
Any time you're ready, Herb.
316
00:23:41,153 --> 00:23:45,696
Silly old me. I do expect my dance hosts
to actually dance.
317
00:23:45,866 --> 00:23:49,532
Of course. It's just that
I don't know if I'm up to...
318
00:23:49,705 --> 00:23:53,452
I'll tell you the truth, Gil.
I lost my wife not too long ago.
319
00:23:53,625 --> 00:23:56,791
Oh, good. Tell it to the ladies.
They eat it up.
320
00:23:57,003 --> 00:24:02,793
Do I take a number,
or may I serve myself?
321
00:24:02,967 --> 00:24:05,458
Yeah, but I'm kind of new at this.
322
00:24:05,637 --> 00:24:09,302
Well, you can dance, can't you?
323
00:24:12,227 --> 00:24:13,270
Oh.
324
00:24:15,062 --> 00:24:17,188
You can dance.
325
00:24:32,207 --> 00:24:33,251
Oh.
326
00:24:33,792 --> 00:24:37,872
- I sure hope these pins hold.
- What pins?
327
00:24:38,047 --> 00:24:43,172
Nothing serious. They just keep
my legs attached to my hips.
328
00:25:39,861 --> 00:25:43,148
- Ever seen so much food in your life?
- Spectacular.
329
00:25:43,534 --> 00:25:45,774
I was a size 4 when I got on this ship.
330
00:25:45,951 --> 00:25:48,786
Excuse me for butting in,
but don't I know you from someplace?
331
00:25:48,955 --> 00:25:51,326
- I don't know, not...
- Pardon me.
332
00:25:51,581 --> 00:25:54,501
- Um...
- Uh...
333
00:26:53,231 --> 00:26:54,482
Bravo.
334
00:26:58,321 --> 00:26:59,863
Thank you very much.
335
00:27:00,031 --> 00:27:02,735
- Is there a seat open there?
- Yes, of course.
336
00:27:02,908 --> 00:27:06,359
- Sure. Pull up a chair.
- Here we go.
337
00:27:06,536 --> 00:27:10,451
- Looks like it's your lucky night, kid.
- It is that, it is.
338
00:27:10,625 --> 00:27:12,867
Luck had absolutely nothing
to do with it.
339
00:27:13,086 --> 00:27:16,121
She played that hand splendidly.
Absolutely splendidly.
340
00:27:16,338 --> 00:27:17,714
Why, thank you.
341
00:27:18,007 --> 00:27:20,248
It's okay. You can drop
the accent now.
342
00:27:20,467 --> 00:27:23,138
You want a refill on this, kid?
343
00:27:23,347 --> 00:27:25,339
Oh, thanks.
344
00:27:25,558 --> 00:27:28,310
Name's Charlie Gordon.
I'm single and I'm looking.
345
00:27:28,978 --> 00:27:32,310
Liz LaBreche. I'm single
and I ain't looking, but thanks.
346
00:27:32,480 --> 00:27:33,939
You're welcome.
347
00:27:34,733 --> 00:27:36,691
They call me Gordo on the street.
348
00:27:36,860 --> 00:27:40,775
- What street is that, Gordo?
- Wall Street. Ever hear of it?
349
00:27:40,989 --> 00:27:43,232
What exactly do you do
on Wall Street?
350
00:27:43,702 --> 00:27:46,239
Well, I have a small hot-dog stand.
351
00:27:46,537 --> 00:27:51,164
When things go badly over there,
I'm in the mergers and acquisitions game.
352
00:27:51,376 --> 00:27:53,203
The buy-in's $ 1000.
353
00:27:53,377 --> 00:27:57,126
A thousand dollars. That reminds me
of my first year at college.
354
00:27:58,049 --> 00:28:00,374
Where exactly did you
go to college, Gordo?
355
00:28:00,596 --> 00:28:02,919
That's a little place called F.U.
356
00:28:04,724 --> 00:28:07,429
- Your name, sir, is...?
- Carswell.
357
00:28:07,643 --> 00:28:10,215
Now, boys, let's not have
a pissing match here.
358
00:28:10,395 --> 00:28:12,102
Let's play cards.
359
00:28:12,313 --> 00:28:17,107
Yes, we're here to play poker
if you can raise the $ 1000.
360
00:28:19,989 --> 00:28:23,903
Thousand doll... May I have that deck,
please? I'll give it right back.
361
00:28:24,118 --> 00:28:25,445
Just wanna take a look...
362
00:28:25,660 --> 00:28:30,953
I'll bet you $5000, even money,
top card's a picture.
363
00:28:31,168 --> 00:28:32,745
- Even money?
- Yes, sir.
364
00:28:33,211 --> 00:28:37,790
- You've got yourself a bet.
- Okay. Turn it over.
365
00:28:40,720 --> 00:28:42,049
You owe me $5000.
366
00:28:44,474 --> 00:28:46,514
That was a lot of fun.
367
00:28:48,104 --> 00:28:51,056
Tell you what. Let's go again for 10.
368
00:28:51,650 --> 00:28:53,191
You don't have to.
369
00:28:53,358 --> 00:28:55,480
If you wanna quit now, it's okay.
370
00:28:55,692 --> 00:28:57,354
I'll give you the five grand.
371
00:28:58,280 --> 00:29:01,613
- Let's make it 20.
- Yes. Yes, I like that.
372
00:29:01,783 --> 00:29:03,241
Now we're having some fun.
373
00:29:03,743 --> 00:29:05,203
Twenty?
374
00:29:06,789 --> 00:29:11,450
You wanna bet $20,000 the top card
is not a picture? You got a deal.
375
00:29:12,544 --> 00:29:14,203
Okay, boy.
376
00:29:14,380 --> 00:29:16,752
Twenty thousand dollars. Turn it over.
377
00:29:18,885 --> 00:29:21,008
Turn it over, please.
378
00:29:31,107 --> 00:29:33,098
That's very interesting.
379
00:29:33,733 --> 00:29:35,975
Boy, is that interesting.
380
00:29:36,779 --> 00:29:38,357
Wanna double it again?
381
00:29:40,073 --> 00:29:41,116
Yes.
382
00:29:42,494 --> 00:29:46,905
Enough of this child's play.
I owe you $ 15,000.
383
00:29:47,080 --> 00:29:49,571
- Let's play poker.
- Okay.
384
00:29:50,502 --> 00:29:53,419
Here we go. That's a lot of fun.
385
00:29:55,551 --> 00:29:59,593
- I'm gonna get a brownie.
- A brownie, yeah.
386
00:30:02,346 --> 00:30:03,390
Sorry.
387
00:30:04,766 --> 00:30:07,722
We'll have to call the Guinness Book
about your friend Charlie.
388
00:30:07,897 --> 00:30:08,939
Now what?
389
00:30:09,104 --> 00:30:12,639
He's taking the longest piss
in recorded freaking history.
390
00:30:12,817 --> 00:30:13,859
Oh.
391
00:30:14,068 --> 00:30:16,559
There's a lady at table 16
who's arrived late.
392
00:30:16,737 --> 00:30:20,438
- I suggest you welcome her.
- Okay, where's table 16?
393
00:30:20,617 --> 00:30:22,326
Over there.
394
00:30:22,869 --> 00:30:24,529
What a lovely room.
395
00:30:25,955 --> 00:30:29,077
Oh, that lady...
396
00:30:37,468 --> 00:30:40,838
- Hi there. Excuse me.
- Nice to see you're still onboard.
397
00:30:41,014 --> 00:30:43,801
Thank you. I just wondered
if you'd care to dance.
398
00:30:43,974 --> 00:30:46,466
Actually, I've seen you move.
399
00:30:46,645 --> 00:30:48,305
How do I know you won't trip...
400
00:30:48,480 --> 00:30:51,682
- ...and drag me overboard?
- You don't.
401
00:30:52,108 --> 00:30:54,683
But I swim even better than I dance.
402
00:30:54,904 --> 00:30:57,310
- Go for it, Mom.
- I promise I won't bite.
403
00:31:01,286 --> 00:31:02,659
Here goes nothing.
404
00:31:11,547 --> 00:31:14,547
I haven't danced in a long time.
405
00:31:14,716 --> 00:31:17,420
Slow, slow, quick, quick.
406
00:31:17,635 --> 00:31:23,175
Slow, slow, quick, quick.
Slow, slow, quick, quick.
407
00:31:23,348 --> 00:31:24,928
Don't look down. Look at me.
408
00:31:26,478 --> 00:31:29,645
Honey, tell me I did the right thing
by bringing Mom along.
409
00:31:29,814 --> 00:31:32,816
You did the right thing.
410
00:31:33,734 --> 00:31:37,983
Now let's go sneak inside
one of those lifeboats.
411
00:31:40,992 --> 00:31:44,909
You and whoever you used to dance
with must have been great together.
412
00:31:45,082 --> 00:31:48,285
Now, promenade.
Yeah, that would be Suzie and me.
413
00:31:48,459 --> 00:31:53,251
We danced all night at our wedding, and
it's like we never stopped for 46 years.
414
00:31:53,506 --> 00:31:56,506
- What a lovely image.
- Well, thank you.
415
00:31:56,968 --> 00:31:59,257
Now tell me all about you. Everything.
416
00:31:59,429 --> 00:32:01,007
- Everything?
- Sure.
417
00:32:01,181 --> 00:32:02,890
It's only a 10-day cruise.
418
00:32:03,059 --> 00:32:06,261
Yeah, well, give me the
Reader's Digest version, you know?
419
00:32:07,103 --> 00:32:08,147
Okay.
420
00:32:09,356 --> 00:32:11,266
- I live in New York.
- Yeah.
421
00:32:11,441 --> 00:32:14,775
- I was a book editor at Doubleday.
- Ooh.
422
00:32:15,072 --> 00:32:16,731
- Mother of two.
- Uh-huh.
423
00:32:17,825 --> 00:32:20,196
Recent widow of one...
424
00:32:20,368 --> 00:32:25,280
...and I was shanghaied here
by newlyweds.
425
00:32:25,457 --> 00:32:27,664
- Oh.
- The bride is my daughter.
426
00:32:27,835 --> 00:32:30,836
- Oh, I'm sure that she meant well.
- I'm sure.
427
00:32:31,005 --> 00:32:32,914
Are you having any fun?
428
00:32:33,091 --> 00:32:37,550
- I don't know yet.
- Oh. What do you know?
429
00:33:02,456 --> 00:33:04,910
Thank you, thank you.
430
00:33:09,253 --> 00:33:11,875
- That was fun.
- Yeah.
431
00:33:12,507 --> 00:33:14,001
Doctor...?
432
00:33:14,175 --> 00:33:18,172
- Oh. Sullivan. Call me Herb.
- Vivian.
433
00:33:19,307 --> 00:33:21,216
I could use a little fresh air.
434
00:33:21,434 --> 00:33:22,891
Join me?
435
00:33:23,266 --> 00:33:26,020
- Well, I'd love to...
- I promise I won't bite.
436
00:33:26,313 --> 00:33:30,558
You know something? I'm going along
with you, in case you change your mind.
437
00:33:31,318 --> 00:33:33,940
Are you getting enough zeros in there?
438
00:33:40,619 --> 00:33:41,948
Eighteen thousand.
439
00:33:42,246 --> 00:33:43,825
Thank you.
440
00:33:45,334 --> 00:33:49,249
Enjoying the company
of a stunning lady...
441
00:33:49,422 --> 00:33:52,672
...is all I wish to take away
from this table, sir.
442
00:33:53,382 --> 00:33:54,877
Mere confetti.
443
00:33:56,512 --> 00:33:59,086
Confetti, sir.
444
00:34:01,307 --> 00:34:02,850
Excuse me.
445
00:34:06,980 --> 00:34:10,315
I once heard that
if a whale loses its mate...
446
00:34:10,484 --> 00:34:12,809
...it never takes another.
447
00:34:13,029 --> 00:34:15,865
Do you suppose that
could really happen?
448
00:34:17,075 --> 00:34:20,028
I mean, I haven't spoken to
a lot of whales lately...
449
00:34:20,202 --> 00:34:23,655
...but hell, if it was perfect
the first time, then...
450
00:34:23,832 --> 00:34:27,415
My feelings... My feelings exactly.
451
00:34:29,130 --> 00:34:31,999
Better not fall on our heads.
452
00:34:32,215 --> 00:34:35,383
No. That's 50-gauge cable.
453
00:34:35,595 --> 00:34:39,011
Hell, that could hold a couple of
elephants playing patty-cake.
454
00:34:39,181 --> 00:34:42,182
Either you know your elephants,
or you know your cable.
455
00:34:42,352 --> 00:34:45,221
- I was a swabbie. Pacific area.
- Really?
456
00:34:45,396 --> 00:34:46,438
Yeah.
457
00:34:46,605 --> 00:34:51,848
- You ever have to get in one of those?
- No, ma'am. Thank God.
458
00:34:53,739 --> 00:34:55,199
Matowski did, though.
459
00:34:56,118 --> 00:34:59,152
- Who?
- Ensign Myron Matowski.
460
00:34:59,328 --> 00:35:03,278
See, he was nuts about this Filipino girl,
and her parents objected.
461
00:35:03,457 --> 00:35:06,458
They put her in a boat
to send her to another island.
462
00:35:06,793 --> 00:35:09,711
Matowski hijacks one
of these lifeboats...
463
00:35:09,880 --> 00:35:12,836
...gets in there. Out he goes.
Sends up a flare.
464
00:35:13,011 --> 00:35:15,584
He damn near started a naval battle.
465
00:35:15,805 --> 00:35:17,676
- She see the flare?
- You kidding?
466
00:35:17,889 --> 00:35:21,055
Last I heard, they were working
on their sixth grandchild...
467
00:35:21,226 --> 00:35:23,550
...and she had her own brand
of applesauce.
468
00:35:29,318 --> 00:35:31,442
So tell me.
469
00:35:31,612 --> 00:35:34,399
How does a swabbie
become a doctor?
470
00:35:34,615 --> 00:35:36,075
A what?
471
00:35:36,367 --> 00:35:39,654
Yeah. I wanted to explain that to you.
472
00:35:39,830 --> 00:35:43,032
- Oh, you don't have to explain.
- No, I wanted to explain.
473
00:35:43,666 --> 00:35:46,538
Well, would you like to walk me
to my cabin?
474
00:35:46,754 --> 00:35:51,083
Yeah, I would, but I ca... I can't.
475
00:35:51,591 --> 00:35:53,584
- I can take a hint.
- No, what hint?
476
00:35:53,760 --> 00:35:57,805
I promised a couple of chest butchers
that I'd have a brandy with them.
477
00:35:57,972 --> 00:35:59,225
Right.
478
00:36:05,356 --> 00:36:08,273
Chest butchers?
479
00:36:08,442 --> 00:36:10,814
What the hell kind of a moron
are you?
480
00:36:12,823 --> 00:36:16,359
Now, why would you go
and do something like that?
481
00:36:16,912 --> 00:36:18,405
To impress you.
482
00:36:18,579 --> 00:36:25,245
Oh. Oh, well, keep it up.
This might work.
483
00:36:31,426 --> 00:36:33,718
Mr. Gordon.
484
00:36:35,971 --> 00:36:40,300
What you do, like samurai.
Great style.
485
00:36:52,947 --> 00:36:58,108
You have most terrible accent.
Where you learn Japanese?
486
00:36:58,286 --> 00:37:00,743
- Okinawa.
- Oh.
487
00:37:00,914 --> 00:37:05,042
It's a small sushi joint
on the Sunset Strip.
488
00:37:11,133 --> 00:37:12,509
Where were you?
489
00:37:12,676 --> 00:37:16,261
- A passenger requested an escort, sir.
- Fraternizing.
490
00:37:16,431 --> 00:37:20,265
Nobody fratted anybody.
All we did was... Oh, my God.
491
00:37:20,437 --> 00:37:25,312
Coming through, please.
Injured man here. Injury.
492
00:37:27,484 --> 00:37:29,892
If it isn't the phantom
of the ballroom.
493
00:37:30,404 --> 00:37:32,778
I ought to sue you guys.
494
00:37:32,950 --> 00:37:35,488
Everything around here is so
slippery and wet.
495
00:37:35,994 --> 00:37:39,114
- It's an ocean liner.
- I may never dance again.
496
00:37:39,748 --> 00:37:41,740
Again... I haven't seen you dance yet.
497
00:37:41,958 --> 00:37:45,076
Fortunately for you,
I found the infirmary.
498
00:37:45,670 --> 00:37:48,541
The infirmary is closed at this hour.
499
00:37:48,757 --> 00:37:51,509
- That's what I found out.
- Look...
500
00:37:52,928 --> 00:37:57,969
Let me... Let me speak candidly,
gentlemen.
501
00:37:58,142 --> 00:38:03,813
I'm this close to a promotion that would
make me vice president of entertainment.
502
00:38:03,983 --> 00:38:05,024
Wow.
503
00:38:06,110 --> 00:38:09,608
I intend to get that job
by showing how well...
504
00:38:09,779 --> 00:38:12,449
...I can keep two old dickheads
like you in line.
505
00:38:12,616 --> 00:38:14,738
- Oh, now listen.
- No, you listen.
506
00:38:14,908 --> 00:38:18,444
Don't mess with me.
I'm your worst nightmare.
507
00:38:18,622 --> 00:38:22,535
A song and dance man
raised on a military base.
508
00:38:22,709 --> 00:38:24,795
Dismissed.
509
00:38:35,390 --> 00:38:38,557
You seem to be annoyed with me,
Herbie.
510
00:38:38,728 --> 00:38:41,514
Tell me if I'm wrong.
511
00:38:42,105 --> 00:38:45,438
And what's this about you
leaving the dance floor?
512
00:38:45,609 --> 00:38:47,565
None of your business.
513
00:38:47,735 --> 00:38:51,521
None of my business.
How do you like that?
514
00:38:52,324 --> 00:38:56,273
- Why are you sterilizing your trousers?
- I'm steaming them.
515
00:38:56,453 --> 00:38:59,205
What are you gonna do?
Eat them with garlic butter?
516
00:38:59,372 --> 00:39:02,743
It takes the wrinkles out,
you imbecile.
517
00:39:03,169 --> 00:39:08,044
A man is steaming his pants at midnight,
it generally means there's a broad.
518
00:39:08,215 --> 00:39:09,759
No broad.
519
00:39:09,968 --> 00:39:14,298
Well, that's too bad because I got
one lined up. Rich, Texas-rich...
520
00:39:14,474 --> 00:39:19,716
...with an ass so beautiful it's a shame
she has to sit down on it.
521
00:39:19,937 --> 00:39:22,559
Will you do me a favor
and knock that stuff off?
522
00:39:23,108 --> 00:39:25,348
I'm sorry. I forgot you were cooking.
523
00:39:25,568 --> 00:39:29,068
Now that you got this girl,
when will she find out you're not...
524
00:39:29,238 --> 00:39:32,323
...who she thought you were?
- By then she'll be in love.
525
00:39:32,533 --> 00:39:35,867
- In love with a lie.
- Nobody's perfect.
526
00:39:36,245 --> 00:39:40,161
I think a man should tell a woman
the truth before she falls in love.
527
00:39:40,334 --> 00:39:44,377
- Otherwise, how do you know it's real?
- What's real is if I play my cards right...
528
00:39:44,544 --> 00:39:46,205
...I'll wind up on easy street.
529
00:39:46,381 --> 00:39:49,250
Once I'm there,
I'm inviting you over every Sunday.
530
00:39:49,425 --> 00:39:53,259
- I don't want anything to do with this.
- Okay, then don't come over.
531
00:39:54,516 --> 00:39:58,180
- She thinks I'm a doctor.
- Who?
532
00:39:58,353 --> 00:39:59,812
Nobody.
533
00:40:07,696 --> 00:40:10,614
You met a broad.
534
00:40:20,251 --> 00:40:24,248
You're crazy. Years of insanity
have made you crazy.
535
00:40:24,421 --> 00:40:28,171
- Do I look crippled or not.
- Yeah, you look crippled, up here.
536
00:40:29,969 --> 00:40:33,090
Oh, cut it out.
537
00:40:33,806 --> 00:40:36,973
Most of you will work
the dance class from 10 to 11...
538
00:40:37,143 --> 00:40:40,309
...and the wine and cheese tasting
from 12 to 1.
539
00:40:40,478 --> 00:40:42,519
Please use moderation.
540
00:40:42,732 --> 00:40:46,481
The last thing I need is flatulating hosts
staggering about the ship.
541
00:40:46,904 --> 00:40:50,023
I bet his father was cruise director
on the Bismarck.
542
00:40:50,240 --> 00:40:54,534
Think of yourselves as butterflies,
gentlemen...
543
00:40:54,702 --> 00:40:57,575
...and our guests as flowers.
544
00:40:57,750 --> 00:41:02,161
You job is to pollinate the flowers
with hospitality.
545
00:41:02,377 --> 00:41:04,704
This guy's been at sea too long.
546
00:41:04,881 --> 00:41:08,414
And if you screw up, I am personally
going to see to it...
547
00:41:08,592 --> 00:41:12,342
...that you are removed from the ship
and charged the full passage...
548
00:41:12,513 --> 00:41:18,801
...of $5462.51,
as indicated in your contracts.
549
00:41:19,021 --> 00:41:23,518
What the hell is the...? Five thousand?
Five thousand? You told me 2000.
550
00:41:23,692 --> 00:41:28,768
As for you, Mr. Gordon, Dr. Johanson
will see you at 1100 hours, sharp.
551
00:41:28,988 --> 00:41:33,319
I don't think that's necessary, sir.
You see, the foot just needs a little rest.
552
00:41:33,493 --> 00:41:37,326
You will remain off your injured foot...
553
00:41:37,499 --> 00:41:40,250
...until Dr. Johanson says otherwise.
Are we clear?
554
00:41:40,459 --> 00:41:44,837
- Yes, sir, clear. Extremely clear, sir.
- Brilliant.
555
00:41:45,005 --> 00:41:46,966
Dismissed.
556
00:41:52,515 --> 00:41:55,599
All passengersdisembarking at Playa del Carmen...
557
00:41:55,767 --> 00:41:57,891
... please reportto tender deck, midship.
558
00:42:02,192 --> 00:42:06,652
Those of you attending the festivalmust board the fiesta bus at 4: 10.
559
00:42:20,295 --> 00:42:23,330
Well, look who's here.
560
00:42:24,507 --> 00:42:29,881
- Flowers. No. I'll bet they're for me.
- Who else would they be for?
561
00:42:30,096 --> 00:42:33,016
Save it, Hoss.
562
00:42:34,267 --> 00:42:36,508
- Come on in.
- Thank you.
563
00:42:36,686 --> 00:42:39,391
Thank you very much.
Sure appreciate it.
564
00:42:39,564 --> 00:42:44,606
You know, the first day you was in here
sniffing around like a yard dog...
565
00:42:44,777 --> 00:42:47,944
- ...I knew you'd be back.
- Ma, for the love of Pete!
566
00:42:48,114 --> 00:42:51,152
- Oh, who's Pete? My competition?
- That's right.
567
00:42:51,328 --> 00:42:53,451
And guess who I'm rooting for.
568
00:42:54,163 --> 00:42:56,665
Oh, Charlie.
569
00:42:57,292 --> 00:42:58,916
Oh, it's so nice to see you.
570
00:42:59,710 --> 00:43:01,587
Oh, yeah.
571
00:43:02,045 --> 00:43:04,169
- Are these for me?
- No.
572
00:43:04,341 --> 00:43:07,010
- No?
- Oh, yes.
573
00:43:07,219 --> 00:43:10,635
Oh. They're just beautiful.
574
00:43:10,848 --> 00:43:12,637
I didn't want to be too showy.
575
00:43:13,140 --> 00:43:15,631
Oh, well. Yours are very tasteful.
576
00:43:15,811 --> 00:43:17,887
- Thank you, Charlie.
- Thank you.
577
00:43:18,063 --> 00:43:20,981
I have to get dressed.
Why don't you talk to Ma.
578
00:43:21,192 --> 00:43:23,434
- Excuse me.
- Okay.
579
00:43:23,612 --> 00:43:26,148
I want you to behave yourself,
Charlie.
580
00:43:26,321 --> 00:43:30,402
You see, I saw the way you were staring
at my daughter's chest.
581
00:43:30,577 --> 00:43:33,695
- Oh, I used to be a cardiologist.
- Really?
582
00:43:34,581 --> 00:43:38,660
I'm almost ready. Charlie, would you
like to walk with me?
583
00:43:38,877 --> 00:43:41,796
Oh, thank you.
584
00:43:43,256 --> 00:43:46,091
- Ma, we'll see you later.
- Have fun.
585
00:43:46,259 --> 00:43:49,676
I'll try to find a shot glass
for those flowers.
586
00:43:51,055 --> 00:43:53,594
- She's darling, isn't she?
- That's Mom.
587
00:43:53,767 --> 00:43:55,677
- There you are.
- Hello.
588
00:43:55,853 --> 00:43:58,178
We must hurry. The bus is leaving
in 10 minutes.
589
00:43:58,356 --> 00:43:59,850
- Hello there, sport.
- Hello.
590
00:44:00,024 --> 00:44:01,602
Charlie, why don't you come
with us.
591
00:44:01,777 --> 00:44:04,776
Oh, unfortunately,
I'm told that the tour is full.
592
00:44:04,946 --> 00:44:06,823
That's...
593
00:44:07,199 --> 00:44:11,660
About those flowers. Thank you. They're
beautiful. I love them. See you later?
594
00:44:11,829 --> 00:44:13,738
- Have a good day, Gordo.
- Ta-ta.
595
00:44:13,914 --> 00:44:17,746
There's something about
that man I don't like. Don't you agree?
596
00:44:17,918 --> 00:44:20,588
That you don't like him?
I'd agree with that.
597
00:44:32,642 --> 00:44:36,769
What, do they call this dancing?
I did this in line at the A&P.
598
00:44:36,937 --> 00:44:39,392
Well, the view's right.
599
00:44:39,606 --> 00:44:43,391
- I used to have an ass like that.
- Come on, guys. Pay attention.
600
00:44:44,737 --> 00:44:48,985
- Would you mind standing back, please?
- Let me show you how it's done, okay?
601
00:45:06,761 --> 00:45:09,512
Attention. Ship to shore call.Mr. Cullen Carswell.
602
00:45:09,679 --> 00:45:12,303
That's you. That sounds exciting.
603
00:45:12,476 --> 00:45:16,141
- I'll try to wrap it up quickly.
- I'll go ahead and save you a seat.
604
00:45:16,312 --> 00:45:19,064
All right. Ship to shore for Carswell.
605
00:45:19,232 --> 00:45:22,730
Yes. It's an overseas call
from Mr. Donald Trump.
606
00:45:22,903 --> 00:45:26,569
- He's calling from Zürich. It's urgent.
- There a phone with privacy?
607
00:45:26,740 --> 00:45:29,114
Take it at the second booth,
on your right.
608
00:45:29,285 --> 00:45:31,372
Thank you.
609
00:45:37,503 --> 00:45:40,289
This is Cullen Carswell.
I'll take my call now.
610
00:45:40,462 --> 00:45:42,954
- One moment, sir.
- Hello?
611
00:45:43,132 --> 00:45:47,426
- Hello. Mr. Carswell? Hello?
- Who is this?
612
00:45:47,596 --> 00:45:50,883
This is the international operator.
613
00:45:51,060 --> 00:45:57,097
I have momentarily lost your congestion.
Please hold for Mr. Trump.
614
00:45:57,314 --> 00:46:00,268
Yes. I'll hold, but please hurry.
615
00:46:00,609 --> 00:46:04,443
- Are you holding, sir?
- Yes, yes, I'm holding.
616
00:46:05,032 --> 00:46:09,160
- Is this Mr. Carsmell?
- Carswell.
617
00:46:09,327 --> 00:46:12,826
Yeah, please hold. Don't go away.
618
00:46:40,319 --> 00:46:43,818
Passengers traveling to the festivalmust board the fiesta bus...
619
00:46:43,988 --> 00:46:47,240
... at wharf 10 for immediate departure.This it the last...
620
00:46:47,410 --> 00:46:48,453
Hey.
621
00:46:49,077 --> 00:46:52,946
I figured I'd see if there were any
no-shows. Where's your friend?
622
00:46:55,002 --> 00:46:57,872
You just don't give up, do you?
623
00:47:05,430 --> 00:47:09,757
Oh, look at those. Don't you just
love horses, Charlie?
624
00:47:09,933 --> 00:47:12,472
- Only when they win.
- Ah!
625
00:47:13,519 --> 00:47:15,559
You've never done any real gambling.
626
00:47:15,730 --> 00:47:17,438
- For how much?
- Not money.
627
00:47:17,608 --> 00:47:20,812
I'm talking about life. Gambling.
628
00:47:21,071 --> 00:47:22,980
You've never been married,
have you?
629
00:47:23,155 --> 00:47:27,282
- In what sense?
- I knew it. I knew it.
630
00:47:27,451 --> 00:47:29,822
I'm waiting for my sexual prime.
631
00:47:29,995 --> 00:47:32,832
And just when do you think
that's gonna happen?
632
00:47:34,960 --> 00:47:37,332
In about 5 minutes.
633
00:47:39,006 --> 00:47:40,832
That's it, get the hips going.
634
00:47:41,007 --> 00:47:42,799
Get that Cuban motion going.
635
00:47:42,968 --> 00:47:47,759
Ladies under. Very nice.
Good. Come back around.
636
00:47:47,973 --> 00:47:50,809
- Mom, give me a break.
- Shelly, give me a break.
637
00:47:50,977 --> 00:47:52,849
I danced with the man one time.
638
00:47:53,019 --> 00:47:56,686
- You were glowing like Miss Arkansas.
- So I had fun.
639
00:47:56,858 --> 00:48:01,355
Herb's a wonderful dancer, but he's
a doctor and you know I hate doctors.
640
00:48:01,529 --> 00:48:04,281
- Now moving to the side.
Keep the hips going.
641
00:48:04,491 --> 00:48:06,898
There's a class. Let's go join.
It'll be fun.
642
00:48:07,077 --> 00:48:09,404
- Well...
- You love dancing.
643
00:48:09,580 --> 00:48:11,249
Come on.
644
00:48:11,456 --> 00:48:13,542
All right.
645
00:48:14,669 --> 00:48:17,503
- That's it.
- You are getting so good.
646
00:48:17,671 --> 00:48:19,544
Your turn, madame.
647
00:48:20,339 --> 00:48:23,011
Good. Excellent.
648
00:48:23,177 --> 00:48:27,471
Now try anything
that we practiced today. Okay.
649
00:48:27,639 --> 00:48:29,548
Good job, everybody.
650
00:48:29,725 --> 00:48:33,509
How about a wonderful hand
for our dance hosts?
651
00:49:01,969 --> 00:49:04,293
It says that it's a festival
of sacrifice...
652
00:49:04,470 --> 00:49:07,257
...to purge themselves of evil
before the eclipse.
653
00:49:07,432 --> 00:49:10,718
- I'm excited. I've never seen an eclipse.
- Is that right?
654
00:49:10,894 --> 00:49:12,355
- I've seen one once.
- Really?
655
00:49:12,523 --> 00:49:14,432
Yeah, but I think the moon
got in the way.
656
00:49:19,069 --> 00:49:20,112
Yes!
657
00:49:20,822 --> 00:49:23,904
- Oh.
- Here we go. Here we go.
658
00:49:36,712 --> 00:49:39,631
Look how happy they are
that we're here.
659
00:49:47,932 --> 00:49:52,513
- What are you doing?
- I'm looking at this for a possible suit.
660
00:49:59,029 --> 00:50:01,863
- What are you doing?
I wanna dance with my friends.
661
00:50:02,031 --> 00:50:03,906
Come with me.
662
00:50:04,076 --> 00:50:06,779
Come with me, con permiso.
663
00:50:09,123 --> 00:50:11,660
- Watch out.
- You stay here. I'll be right back.
664
00:50:11,833 --> 00:50:15,750
- I gotta see a man about a dog.
- Take your time.
665
00:50:21,677 --> 00:50:25,545
Gil, I've been talking to the board
about hiring...
666
00:50:25,723 --> 00:50:29,853
- ...a vice president of entertainment.
- Interesting.
667
00:50:30,229 --> 00:50:32,850
Is there a way out of here
besides the door?
668
00:50:33,023 --> 00:50:36,523
Oh, yes. Si, si, si. Down the drain.
669
00:50:38,153 --> 00:50:41,439
Very funny, pal. Very funny.
670
00:50:48,373 --> 00:50:52,156
Listen, pal, I need to borrow
your mask for a few minutes.
671
00:50:52,334 --> 00:50:54,043
- Get lost, pops.
- Wait.
672
00:50:54,212 --> 00:50:58,339
I'll let you have this genuine Rolex.
673
00:50:59,717 --> 00:51:01,426
Please, mister.
674
00:51:01,595 --> 00:51:04,631
This ain't a Rolex. It says "Romex."
675
00:51:04,848 --> 00:51:07,518
You gonna make a federal case
out of one letter?
676
00:51:07,685 --> 00:51:09,512
They don't make Romexes anymore.
677
00:51:09,687 --> 00:51:12,260
- This is a collector's item.
- Beat it.
678
00:51:12,481 --> 00:51:16,479
- Oh, don't be ridiculous.
I haven't had a chimichanga in years.
679
00:51:16,943 --> 00:51:20,812
- Would you pardon me for one moment?
- What?
680
00:51:20,990 --> 00:51:24,857
- Nature, you know. Sorry.
- Oh.
681
00:51:25,203 --> 00:51:27,575
Pardon me. Pardon me.
682
00:51:30,623 --> 00:51:31,870
You wanna buy a Rolex?
683
00:51:32,293 --> 00:51:34,334
Coming through.
684
00:51:35,964 --> 00:51:38,252
What's going on here?
685
00:51:39,719 --> 00:51:42,922
Parrot coming through.
Parrot here. Parrot.
686
00:51:49,563 --> 00:51:50,605
Gil!
687
00:51:55,693 --> 00:51:59,193
Huh? Leave her alone for five seconds.
688
00:52:00,447 --> 00:52:02,690
I'm getting a little dizzy.
689
00:52:04,160 --> 00:52:08,703
Are you all right? Let me out of here.
Are you people insane?
690
00:52:11,960 --> 00:52:14,118
What are you doing with the bull?
691
00:52:15,422 --> 00:52:17,089
Holy...!
692
00:52:18,259 --> 00:52:19,967
Oh, my God. I'm the parrot!
693
00:52:22,432 --> 00:52:25,302
I see trouble.
694
00:52:27,894 --> 00:52:30,351
Hey, señor. Hey, pal.
695
00:52:32,899 --> 00:52:34,974
Gil, wait!
696
00:52:41,199 --> 00:52:44,284
All right, mister. I've got you.
697
00:52:45,579 --> 00:52:47,821
Oh, sorry. I thought you were...
698
00:52:48,041 --> 00:52:50,335
Oh, my God.
699
00:52:50,751 --> 00:52:53,125
- Let's go.
- Why are we going now?
700
00:52:53,296 --> 00:52:55,170
Now's the time to loot the shops.
701
00:52:55,340 --> 00:52:59,005
- Charlie, we're witnessing history.
- I've seen history. It stinks.
702
00:52:59,636 --> 00:53:02,507
Stop! There's a fire there!
Can't you see?
703
00:53:02,681 --> 00:53:07,922
My head's on fire! Help me!
Stop this cow instantly!
704
00:53:16,445 --> 00:53:18,948
Well, hello.
705
00:53:19,240 --> 00:53:23,023
Stuff works wonders for groin pain.
Cheers to you all.
706
00:53:23,368 --> 00:53:27,616
I've dug all over Guatemala
and all over Honduras.
707
00:53:27,791 --> 00:53:31,788
The whole culture is so interesting,
so fascinating...
708
00:53:31,961 --> 00:53:35,710
- Vivian.
- Herb, what a lovely surprise.
709
00:53:35,881 --> 00:53:37,127
I know what you're thinking.
710
00:53:37,300 --> 00:53:39,377
- This is my new friend, Sebastian.
- Hello.
711
00:53:39,554 --> 00:53:43,884
He just gave a lecture on the significance
of solar eclipses in Mayan mythology.
712
00:53:44,058 --> 00:53:48,008
Mayan mythology will tell you
that an eclipse isn't an eclipse at all...
713
00:53:48,186 --> 00:53:53,728
...but rather a birth or an unveiling,
if you will, of a new sun, or a new life...
714
00:53:53,903 --> 00:53:54,943
Oh?
715
00:53:57,031 --> 00:54:00,151
- And a dance host on the side.
- I tried to explain this...
716
00:54:00,325 --> 00:54:04,573
Explain what? I think you did
your job very well.
717
00:54:06,791 --> 00:54:08,414
- Who is he?
- I don't know.
718
00:54:08,624 --> 00:54:11,412
- He looks familiar.
- Not to me.
719
00:54:11,628 --> 00:54:15,211
My husband was in the oil business
with my dad.
720
00:54:15,383 --> 00:54:17,957
Daddy trusted him.
I figured I could trust him.
721
00:54:18,136 --> 00:54:20,840
- So, what happened?
- Well, as it turned out...
722
00:54:21,012 --> 00:54:24,679
...there were a lot of test wells
he was drilling on the side.
723
00:54:25,101 --> 00:54:27,852
- Should've had him neutered.
- I did.
724
00:54:28,020 --> 00:54:31,058
Except I used an attorney,
instead of a doctor.
725
00:54:32,901 --> 00:54:37,231
Lending a helping hand.
Thank you, chappies.
726
00:54:37,406 --> 00:54:39,943
- Oh, what's the matter?
- Ah.
727
00:54:40,116 --> 00:54:42,952
- Are you all right?
- Old football injury.
728
00:54:43,120 --> 00:54:45,409
- College?
- No, professional.
729
00:54:45,581 --> 00:54:50,577
The Jets blew a 30-point lead and I tried
to throw my TV set out the window.
730
00:54:52,337 --> 00:54:54,246
- You're in pain. I'll get help.
- No.
731
00:54:57,219 --> 00:54:58,795
What are you doing?
732
00:54:59,011 --> 00:55:01,088
I wanna hear about
your ex-husband.
733
00:55:01,932 --> 00:55:02,975
What?
734
00:55:04,850 --> 00:55:06,678
What seems to be the trouble?
735
00:55:06,854 --> 00:55:10,851
His back went out,
and I think he needs some help.
736
00:55:11,149 --> 00:55:13,391
Would you help me get him
on a deck chair?
737
00:55:13,569 --> 00:55:17,648
God bless you, sir,
whosoever you may be.
738
00:55:18,239 --> 00:55:19,734
Go in this direction...
739
00:55:20,870 --> 00:55:22,826
What are you doing?
740
00:55:22,996 --> 00:55:25,237
I have to get the wind from the east.
741
00:55:28,585 --> 00:55:33,462
Now, fortunately, I'm a retired doctor.
Aren't we lucky?
742
00:55:33,967 --> 00:55:37,631
And chiropractics is my specialty.
Are you his wife?
743
00:55:37,802 --> 00:55:41,302
- Oh. I'm his friend.
- Just a friend. Tell me where the pain is.
744
00:55:41,515 --> 00:55:44,764
- It's okay. It's better now.
- We need a little adjustment.
745
00:55:44,976 --> 00:55:48,561
- I don't need an adjustment.
- Uh-huh.
746
00:55:49,857 --> 00:55:53,227
- A problem in the lumbar region.
- My lumbar is all right.
747
00:55:53,403 --> 00:55:57,316
Don't worry about that leg.
748
00:56:02,328 --> 00:56:04,950
Can you feel anything?
749
00:56:09,586 --> 00:56:13,883
- That should relieve some tension.
- What the hell are you doing?
750
00:56:14,051 --> 00:56:17,051
Just breathe normally.
Move your arm.
751
00:56:17,220 --> 00:56:20,221
- Ah! Ah!
- I haven't done anything yet.
752
00:56:24,396 --> 00:56:27,680
- Do you feel better, my friend?
- I'm gonna get you...
753
00:56:27,897 --> 00:56:29,641
What, a present? Don't be silly?
754
00:56:29,816 --> 00:56:34,643
Just to lighten the suffering of my fellow
human beings is reward enough for me.
755
00:56:37,242 --> 00:56:39,698
- Are you all right?
- Yeah. I'm fine.
756
00:56:39,869 --> 00:56:43,203
Why don't you go.
I'll just rest up here a little while.
757
00:56:43,372 --> 00:56:46,373
- I just can't leave you like this.
- Sure you can.
758
00:56:46,583 --> 00:56:48,492
- You sure?
- Yeah. Go on.
759
00:56:48,668 --> 00:56:51,292
I was gonna meet some friends
in the casino. I'll do that.
760
00:56:51,506 --> 00:56:56,845
Besides, I like lying here on the couch.
It's the puppy dog in me.
761
00:56:57,764 --> 00:57:00,253
I'll see you later.
762
00:57:00,431 --> 00:57:03,184
See you later. Bye.
763
00:57:06,354 --> 00:57:10,519
Must be "the puppy dog in me."
You are in over your head, kid.
764
00:57:11,443 --> 00:57:14,314
- What's that mean?
- I saw the way you looked at her.
765
00:57:14,529 --> 00:57:17,982
She's a beautiful woman with money.
How should I look at her?
766
00:57:18,200 --> 00:57:22,067
- I think you care about her.
- Give me a break, will you?
767
00:57:24,458 --> 00:57:27,328
Oh, boy. I'm gonna sue you
for malpractice.
768
00:57:27,504 --> 00:57:30,588
I saved your ass, is what I did.
769
00:57:34,134 --> 00:57:35,961
Gil, baby.
770
00:57:36,136 --> 00:57:38,923
- I was wondering...
- Oh, shut up!
771
00:57:39,098 --> 00:57:41,388
Tonight you will dance every dance.
772
00:57:41,558 --> 00:57:44,891
You will be charming, attentive
and light of foot...
773
00:57:45,061 --> 00:57:48,348
- ...and I will be watching.
- Yes, sir!
774
00:57:48,941 --> 00:57:51,811
Have Dr. Johanson look at that eye,
Sullivan.
775
00:57:53,863 --> 00:57:58,776
Herbie, we've been pals
for such a long time. Give me a break.
776
00:57:58,952 --> 00:58:00,411
The answer is no.
777
00:58:00,580 --> 00:58:03,201
If I don't dance, they'll throw me off
the ship.
778
00:58:03,373 --> 00:58:05,830
I'll teach you how to swim,
not how to dance.
779
00:58:06,001 --> 00:58:09,452
Herbie, please. Please, I beg you,
open up your heart.
780
00:58:09,630 --> 00:58:10,793
Will you knock it off?
781
00:58:10,966 --> 00:58:14,050
Open your heart to a sad,
frightened old man.
782
00:58:14,219 --> 00:58:15,260
Oh...
783
00:58:16,511 --> 00:58:19,846
Slow, slow, quick, quick.
784
00:58:20,016 --> 00:58:24,973
Slow, slow, quick, quick.
There you go.
785
00:58:25,145 --> 00:58:30,935
Slow... Slow, slow, quick, quick.
786
00:58:31,112 --> 00:58:32,939
You're very much like a crane.
787
00:58:33,114 --> 00:58:38,321
Slow, slow, quick, quick. Go ahead.
788
00:58:40,329 --> 00:58:44,578
Slow, slow, quick... Oh, God.
789
00:58:44,752 --> 00:58:48,369
Okay, try it left, right...
790
00:58:49,130 --> 00:58:51,039
...together.
791
00:58:51,216 --> 00:58:55,461
Uh-huh. Bingo. Left...
792
00:58:56,094 --> 00:58:59,714
...right, together.
793
00:59:00,600 --> 00:59:04,053
Very strange. Okay, this is
the grapevine.
794
00:59:04,230 --> 00:59:06,553
Cross, behind, together.
795
00:59:06,731 --> 00:59:09,984
Slow, slow, quick, quick.
796
00:59:11,864 --> 00:59:15,813
One, two, three, cha-cha.
One, two, three, cha-cha.
797
00:59:16,034 --> 00:59:19,734
One, two, three, cha-cha.
One, two, three, cha-cha.
798
00:59:19,954 --> 00:59:22,790
One, two, three, cha-cha.
One...
799
00:59:22,958 --> 00:59:25,828
Okay, now wait a minute. Here we...
Let's try...
800
00:59:26,043 --> 00:59:29,627
One, two, three, cha-cha.
One, two, three, cha-cha.
801
00:59:29,799 --> 00:59:33,297
One, two... That's very...
802
00:59:33,468 --> 00:59:35,462
What the hell is that?
803
00:59:35,637 --> 00:59:40,346
Guys do this all the time on the streets,
and people throw money at them.
804
00:59:40,684 --> 00:59:44,053
You're not getting a nickel out of me.
805
00:59:48,361 --> 00:59:50,898
Wait a minute. This is wrong.
You're leading.
806
00:59:51,071 --> 00:59:53,148
I'm supposed to lead. I'm a man.
807
00:59:53,323 --> 00:59:56,490
- Kiss me.
- All right, you lead.
808
01:00:41,707 --> 01:00:42,786
Gentlemen, the...
809
01:00:49,757 --> 01:00:52,886
No. No, no, no.
810
01:00:53,930 --> 01:00:56,633
- See, he's...
- It's my first time.
811
01:00:56,973 --> 01:00:59,595
- Oh.
- Dancing, that is.
812
01:00:59,767 --> 01:01:03,468
See, yeah, we're just friends, you know.
Good pals. Buddies.
813
01:01:03,690 --> 01:01:08,268
- Yes, of course.
- Don't ask, don't tell.
814
01:01:20,456 --> 01:01:23,208
- Is that a waiter's jacket?
- How can you tell?
815
01:01:23,376 --> 01:01:26,994
You've got stains all over the sleeve
and parsley down your back.
816
01:01:27,171 --> 01:01:29,580
- It fits like a pup tent.
- Are you kidding?
817
01:01:29,759 --> 01:01:34,337
Good evening, gentlemen.
Time to face the music, eh, Charlie?
818
01:01:37,809 --> 01:01:40,102
Let's face.
819
01:01:42,397 --> 01:01:44,970
Once again, your host...
820
01:01:45,192 --> 01:01:50,815
... the very talented Mr. Gil Godwyn.
821
01:01:51,031 --> 01:01:55,776
Ladies and gentlemen, here we are,
under the stars...
822
01:01:55,953 --> 01:01:59,867
...in the moonlight,
out on the open sea.
823
01:02:00,040 --> 01:02:04,250
Let's get ready to rumba.
824
01:02:04,460 --> 01:02:07,629
We're going to rumba.
825
01:02:10,051 --> 01:02:11,842
He's demented.
826
01:02:33,200 --> 01:02:35,490
Hey, you're on, champ.
827
01:02:41,167 --> 01:02:43,836
Care to dance, madam?
828
01:02:44,002 --> 01:02:46,043
Yes. Yes, I'd love to.
829
01:02:53,347 --> 01:02:54,971
Don't slouch.
830
01:02:56,391 --> 01:02:58,600
Have you been hosting for long?
831
01:02:58,771 --> 01:03:02,020
This is my 23rd run, ma'am.
832
01:03:02,523 --> 01:03:05,690
I started out giving ballroom
exhibitions.
833
01:03:14,744 --> 01:03:16,783
Shorten your steps.
834
01:03:24,254 --> 01:03:27,586
You're doing very well,
madam, but don't rush it.
835
01:03:27,798 --> 01:03:31,086
You see, the rumba is more of a walk
than a dance.
836
01:03:31,346 --> 01:03:32,389
Oh.
837
01:03:33,514 --> 01:03:36,267
- Oh, shit.
- Beg your pardon?
838
01:03:36,434 --> 01:03:38,891
Hit. This song was a big hit.
839
01:03:41,439 --> 01:03:43,645
What does that have to do
with the rumba?
840
01:03:43,816 --> 01:03:45,478
- Absolutely nothing.
- Oh.
841
01:03:53,784 --> 01:03:55,528
You said walk.
842
01:03:55,704 --> 01:03:57,531
It's a fast walk.
843
01:04:02,421 --> 01:04:03,462
Ow!
844
01:04:09,970 --> 01:04:11,249
Oh, God.
845
01:04:20,856 --> 01:04:25,102
- What do you call this step?
- This is the Brazilian Creep.
846
01:04:25,318 --> 01:04:28,689
In Brazil, of course, it's just called
"the Creep."
847
01:04:45,716 --> 01:04:47,840
What are you doing?
848
01:04:49,428 --> 01:04:51,721
Oh. Whoa...
849
01:05:31,723 --> 01:05:32,802
- Oh!
- Ow!
850
01:05:32,974 --> 01:05:35,727
- Oh, I'm so sorry. Sorry.
- No, it's our fault.
851
01:06:04,924 --> 01:06:06,916
Excuse me.
852
01:06:07,552 --> 01:06:09,261
Thank you.
853
01:06:14,309 --> 01:06:18,093
Do you have any idea whom you've just
assaulted on the dance floor?
854
01:06:18,270 --> 01:06:24,062
- Ms. Carruthers, I don't know what...
- I feel ravaged. Thank you.
855
01:06:24,237 --> 01:06:26,110
I'm Ellen Carruthers.
856
01:06:26,280 --> 01:06:29,198
Oh. You're the dame that owns
this little boat.
857
01:06:31,409 --> 01:06:34,744
Excuse me, duty calls.
858
01:06:41,296 --> 01:06:43,236
All over Honduras, you wouldn't believe
what happened.
859
01:06:43,340 --> 01:06:46,792
- There were 40,000 people...
- So...
860
01:06:46,969 --> 01:06:49,211
It's the broad that stole
our plane seats.
861
01:06:49,389 --> 01:06:53,172
- That broad was an editor at Doubleday.
- Who cares?
862
01:06:53,392 --> 01:06:57,721
- All I was was a clerk at Gimbels.
- And Secretariat was just a horse.
863
01:06:57,896 --> 01:07:00,602
- Go on, ask her to dance.
- It's too late, Charlie.
864
01:07:02,319 --> 01:07:06,529
There's no such thing as too late.
That's why they invented death.
865
01:07:06,905 --> 01:07:08,156
Dance.
866
01:07:11,493 --> 01:07:15,623
- His books were burned...
- You're kidding.
867
01:07:15,791 --> 01:07:18,033
...by the Inquisition.
They were burned.
868
01:07:18,210 --> 01:07:22,373
So now, the Aztecs will argue
that they invented the ladle.
869
01:07:22,548 --> 01:07:24,956
But ancient drawings show
that the Mayans...
870
01:07:25,134 --> 01:07:28,135
...were using a large perforated
scooping utensil.
871
01:07:28,304 --> 01:07:32,253
Excuse me. I'm gonna go drop
the anchor on my toe.
872
01:07:32,433 --> 01:07:34,757
- I'll go with you.
- You're leaving?
873
01:07:34,935 --> 01:07:38,804
Anyway, what was important is when
I shone the light in the cave...
874
01:07:38,981 --> 01:07:43,976
...there it was on the wall, the ladle,
which proved, beyond reasonable doubt...
875
01:07:44,154 --> 01:07:48,566
Excuse me. I would really be very
honored if you would care to join me.
876
01:07:49,867 --> 01:07:51,694
I've already danced this dance.
877
01:07:51,912 --> 01:07:55,328
Yes, I was hoping you might want
to try it again.
878
01:07:55,750 --> 01:08:02,167
You know, an archeologist in Reykjavik
claims the Incas did a form of the Hustle.
879
01:08:02,339 --> 01:08:04,914
- What?
- You never heard of that?
880
01:08:05,093 --> 01:08:06,761
You win.
881
01:08:07,844 --> 01:08:09,839
Excuse us.
882
01:08:17,773 --> 01:08:21,687
- You dance much better than you lie.
- Well, lying is new to me...
883
01:08:21,860 --> 01:08:24,101
...but I've been dancing
most of my life.
884
01:08:24,279 --> 01:08:27,148
Did you start dancing before
or after medical school?
885
01:08:27,323 --> 01:08:28,735
You're a funny lady.
886
01:08:28,910 --> 01:08:33,239
I'm also a very serious lady,
especially when I'm lied to.
887
01:08:33,456 --> 01:08:36,078
Hey, I didn't lie to you. My friend did.
888
01:08:36,294 --> 01:08:38,414
Well, you could have told me
the truth.
889
01:08:38,586 --> 01:08:41,422
- Well, maybe I was afraid.
- Afraid of what?
890
01:08:41,632 --> 01:08:45,463
Well, that you would laugh
or be disappointed.
891
01:08:45,634 --> 01:08:47,344
- About what?
- I don't know.
892
01:08:47,721 --> 01:08:50,260
- Well, tell me now.
- Tell you what?
893
01:08:50,433 --> 01:08:51,974
Try the truth.
894
01:08:52,142 --> 01:08:56,057
The truth is, I was just a clerk
at Gimbels for 35 years...
895
01:08:56,230 --> 01:08:58,352
...till they damn went
out of business.
896
01:08:58,565 --> 01:09:04,485
And I got roped into this stupid dance
host thing by that lunatic over there.
897
01:09:07,284 --> 01:09:08,744
Just...
898
01:09:13,665 --> 01:09:15,871
What happened?
899
01:09:16,542 --> 01:09:20,756
- Wait a second.
- So I can make a fool of myself again?
900
01:09:31,432 --> 01:09:34,435
I didn't think I'd ever kiss
anybody that way again.
901
01:09:34,772 --> 01:09:36,561
Neither did I.
902
01:09:38,399 --> 01:09:40,558
- I need to step outside.
- We are outside.
903
01:09:40,818 --> 01:09:42,857
I knew that.
904
01:09:50,121 --> 01:09:52,279
But won't you get in trouble, I mean...
905
01:09:52,457 --> 01:09:54,578
...if someone should see us like this?
906
01:09:54,749 --> 01:09:57,241
- They could throw me overboard.
- I'd miss you.
907
01:09:57,462 --> 01:09:58,505
Yeah?
908
01:10:00,340 --> 01:10:03,341
Why don't we watch the eclipse
together tomorrow.
909
01:10:03,509 --> 01:10:06,677
- All right.
- We could go in separate buses...
910
01:10:06,847 --> 01:10:09,088
...to Chichén Itzá and meet at a café.
911
01:10:09,598 --> 01:10:13,514
- What café?
- It's a town. There must be a café.
912
01:10:13,728 --> 01:10:16,398
I'll find it and you'll find me.
913
01:10:21,569 --> 01:10:24,656
- It's been my pleasure, ma'am.
- Thank you very much.
914
01:10:24,865 --> 01:10:28,401
Hey, Gil! I loved the number.
915
01:10:28,578 --> 01:10:30,536
Thank you.
916
01:10:32,497 --> 01:10:34,573
There are almost a dozen
in the fleet now.
917
01:10:34,750 --> 01:10:36,003
Madam.
918
01:10:38,298 --> 01:10:40,705
- Well, hello there.
- Hello. How do you do?
919
01:10:40,882 --> 01:10:44,298
- Mr. Godwyn asked me to give you this.
- Oh, thank you.
920
01:10:55,940 --> 01:10:58,893
Would you excuse me, please?
921
01:10:59,067 --> 01:11:00,895
How charming you look tonight.
922
01:11:01,071 --> 01:11:03,443
Oh, Mr. Godwyn.
923
01:11:03,741 --> 01:11:05,198
Why aren't you dancing?
924
01:11:05,366 --> 01:11:07,276
Because Mrs. Carruthers...
925
01:11:07,452 --> 01:11:09,861
...asked me to give you a message.
926
01:11:10,039 --> 01:11:12,114
- Really?
- Yes. I have a feeling, sir...
927
01:11:12,290 --> 01:11:16,039
...that you're going to get that
promotion you've been looking for.
928
01:11:16,421 --> 01:11:20,334
- Did she say that?
- She said she wants you in her room...
929
01:11:20,508 --> 01:11:22,049
...ASPCA.
930
01:11:22,217 --> 01:11:23,259
ASAP.
931
01:11:24,177 --> 01:11:25,921
Her room? Now?
932
01:11:27,266 --> 01:11:30,300
Her exact words were...
933
01:11:32,895 --> 01:11:36,764
- I don't remember them offhand, but...
- Come on, man.
934
01:11:36,941 --> 01:11:39,268
"If not sooner."
935
01:11:40,947 --> 01:11:43,105
- Get on that dance floor.
- Yes, sir.
936
01:11:47,161 --> 01:11:48,489
- Hi there.
- Yes.
937
01:11:48,661 --> 01:11:51,997
- Gotta deliver Godwyn's shirts.
- You need the key?
938
01:11:52,166 --> 01:11:54,918
I'm not gonna slip them under
the door. They'll get wrinkled.
939
01:11:56,712 --> 01:12:01,090
- Ah. Hello, hello, hello.
- Oh, hello.
940
01:12:01,258 --> 01:12:03,298
You sure made a fast recovery.
941
01:12:03,511 --> 01:12:05,385
Nothing like being young.
942
01:12:08,431 --> 01:12:11,184
Why do you look at me
as though I were trouble?
943
01:12:11,810 --> 01:12:14,303
- I like trouble.
- I like you too.
944
01:12:14,523 --> 01:12:18,568
- How about a game of poker?
- Okay. But I gotta warn you, Carswell...
945
01:12:18,736 --> 01:12:21,855
...this time, I'm not tearing up
any of your checks.
946
01:12:27,035 --> 01:12:29,407
I think you're a phony, Chuck.
947
01:12:29,622 --> 01:12:32,160
- And I'm going to prove it.
- Oh, boy.
948
01:12:32,626 --> 01:12:36,041
Nice to see you relaxing tonight,
Carswell.
949
01:12:52,228 --> 01:12:56,062
- I beg your pardon.
- Take a hike. Hi.
950
01:12:57,026 --> 01:13:01,357
- To what do I owe this pleasure?
- Two vodka stingers and I lost my key.
951
01:13:01,615 --> 01:13:04,616
- Oh.
- How about you?
952
01:13:05,659 --> 01:13:07,617
I work here.
953
01:13:07,828 --> 01:13:12,989
You do? Uh... Do you do CPR?
954
01:13:14,711 --> 01:13:15,956
How does it go?
955
01:13:48,581 --> 01:13:50,620
It's open.
956
01:13:52,084 --> 01:13:53,626
Mrs. Carruthers?
957
01:13:58,925 --> 01:14:02,293
Ellen. A bit of bubbly?
958
01:14:03,136 --> 01:14:04,882
Ace, queen bets.
959
01:14:06,183 --> 01:14:08,673
I will check.
960
01:14:09,978 --> 01:14:11,687
Check. Check.
961
01:14:12,022 --> 01:14:13,398
I check.
962
01:14:19,112 --> 01:14:21,485
I bet 20 grand.
963
01:14:23,492 --> 01:14:24,573
Hmm...
964
01:14:25,286 --> 01:14:27,326
Too rich for my blood.
965
01:14:28,372 --> 01:14:29,832
I fold.
966
01:14:31,791 --> 01:14:32,835
Hmm.
967
01:14:34,086 --> 01:14:36,209
- How much you bet?
- Twenty thousand.
968
01:14:36,422 --> 01:14:38,546
- Twenty thousand dollars.
- Right.
969
01:14:43,973 --> 01:14:45,016
Call.
970
01:14:48,977 --> 01:14:50,021
Oh!
971
01:14:51,022 --> 01:14:52,482
- Sorry.
- Are you all right?
972
01:14:52,650 --> 01:14:55,851
- Yes, of course I'm all right.
- Does anyone have a napkin?
973
01:14:57,028 --> 01:14:58,855
Card in sleeve. He's a cheat.
974
01:14:59,029 --> 01:15:01,735
- You were right.
- Pretty sloppy, Carswell.
975
01:15:01,948 --> 01:15:05,449
I'm gonna overlook this...
976
01:15:05,620 --> 01:15:08,905
- ...because you are an asshole.
- Monsieur Gordon is right.
977
01:15:09,082 --> 01:15:10,411
You are an asshole.
978
01:15:10,834 --> 01:15:13,159
I've never done anything
like this before.
979
01:15:13,336 --> 01:15:16,836
- You'll have to leave the casino.
- Gentlemen, please believe me.
980
01:15:17,049 --> 01:15:20,001
It doesn't matter what we believe,
does it, Carswell?
981
01:15:23,097 --> 01:15:24,558
Tra-la.
982
01:15:26,976 --> 01:15:30,810
All right. This hand is dead.
Everybody will get their money back.
983
01:15:33,608 --> 01:15:36,099
Say we go someplace
quiet for a nightcap?
984
01:15:36,277 --> 01:15:37,735
- "Someplace quiet."
- Yeah.
985
01:15:37,903 --> 01:15:39,777
Right. Like your room, right?
986
01:15:39,948 --> 01:15:41,823
- Wonderful suggestion.
- No.
987
01:15:43,202 --> 01:15:46,286
No, that wasn't my suggestion.
988
01:15:50,875 --> 01:15:52,997
- Here you go.
- Thank you.
989
01:15:53,169 --> 01:15:56,255
Oh, this is a nice suite, Charlie.
990
01:16:06,143 --> 01:16:08,183
Charlie, about your cologne.
991
01:16:08,353 --> 01:16:10,926
- Oh, it's not cologne. It's after-shave.
- Oh.
992
01:16:11,107 --> 01:16:13,978
You ever thought of growing a beard?
993
01:16:14,611 --> 01:16:17,278
No, not really.
994
01:16:20,700 --> 01:16:21,743
Charlie.
995
01:16:23,743 --> 01:16:24,859
Oh, Charlie.
996
01:16:34,048 --> 01:16:35,540
Good morning.
997
01:16:35,715 --> 01:16:38,421
It should be another dayof calm seas and smooth sailing.
998
01:16:38,594 --> 01:16:42,425
If you are in a hurry to meetyour shore tour for the eclipse...
999
01:16:42,639 --> 01:16:46,305
... we feature an expresscontinental breakfast in the lido.
1000
01:17:00,909 --> 01:17:03,067
That's above and beyond
the call of duty.
1001
01:17:03,244 --> 01:17:06,079
Guy should make captain for that.
1002
01:17:16,092 --> 01:17:19,011
Oh... Oh, yes.
1003
01:17:20,930 --> 01:17:21,972
Oh.
1004
01:17:27,395 --> 01:17:29,268
Armor All?
1005
01:17:34,193 --> 01:17:38,239
I really had a good time last night.
I really enjoyed myself.
1006
01:17:38,407 --> 01:17:40,281
- I... I just...
- Shh.
1007
01:17:40,450 --> 01:17:42,572
You don't have to.
1008
01:17:45,288 --> 01:17:49,333
Oh. What happened to
the good-looking one?
1009
01:17:49,502 --> 01:17:53,999
This is the good-looking one, Ma.
See you later.
1010
01:18:09,856 --> 01:18:12,098
Race you around the ship, pal.
1011
01:18:26,916 --> 01:18:29,703
Bravo! Bravissimo! Bravo!
1012
01:18:41,807 --> 01:18:47,098
After a lifetime of wandering
through the deserts of humanity...
1013
01:18:47,521 --> 01:18:51,104
...I find in you my oasis.
1014
01:18:51,819 --> 01:18:53,146
That's terrible.
1015
01:18:55,112 --> 01:18:58,731
Doctors say I have only
a few more months.
1016
01:18:58,992 --> 01:19:02,028
Let's be married before one
more grain of sand flows...
1017
01:19:02,202 --> 01:19:04,694
...through the hourglass of mortality.
1018
01:19:04,873 --> 01:19:07,034
You barely know this woman.
1019
01:19:07,251 --> 01:19:10,335
Liz, I would be honored
if you took my last name...
1020
01:19:10,505 --> 01:19:12,663
...and put it on your bank account.
1021
01:19:12,881 --> 01:19:14,755
That's the one.
1022
01:19:16,301 --> 01:19:19,304
All passengers going ashoreto view the eclipse...
1023
01:19:19,514 --> 01:19:22,136
... please remember to wearprotective eyewear.
1024
01:19:22,351 --> 01:19:25,186
- The 1 -ounce bottle is beautiful.
- I'll take it.
1025
01:19:25,353 --> 01:19:26,395
Okay.
1026
01:19:32,319 --> 01:19:35,438
I finally figured it out,
seeing you in the gift shop.
1027
01:19:35,655 --> 01:19:39,486
Back at St. Vincent's, I was always
running into you in the gift shop.
1028
01:19:39,659 --> 01:19:41,367
St. Vincent...
1029
01:19:41,536 --> 01:19:44,029
Oh, my God! It's Nurse Collins.
1030
01:19:45,251 --> 01:19:48,085
I can't believe that
I didn't recognize you!
1031
01:19:48,252 --> 01:19:50,292
It's probably not one of
your better memories.
1032
01:19:50,463 --> 01:19:52,917
Oh, no. Come on.
Suzie was nuts about you.
1033
01:19:54,133 --> 01:19:55,878
- Feeling was mutual.
- Yeah.
1034
01:19:56,303 --> 01:19:58,841
You were a complete pain in the butt.
1035
01:19:59,055 --> 01:20:00,098
Yeah.
1036
01:20:00,766 --> 01:20:04,348
Listen, I've got exactly 20 minutes.
How about a cup of coffee?
1037
01:20:04,518 --> 01:20:05,562
Love it.
1038
01:20:05,770 --> 01:20:09,141
... to view the eclipse,report to tender deck midship.
1039
01:20:09,984 --> 01:20:13,981
Even towards the end,
there were moments when...
1040
01:20:14,154 --> 01:20:16,727
When we both felt...
1041
01:20:17,281 --> 01:20:23,073
...that we weren't gonna
let this thing beat us.
1042
01:20:23,248 --> 01:20:26,699
Yeah. You guys were
one of those couples.
1043
01:20:27,293 --> 01:20:30,709
I remember on the last night.
There's so much medication...
1044
01:20:30,922 --> 01:20:33,461
...who knows whether
they understand...
1045
01:20:33,634 --> 01:20:37,796
...but I remember you leaning
right down next to her ear...
1046
01:20:37,971 --> 01:20:42,266
...telling her you'd be in love with her
always and forever.
1047
01:20:43,560 --> 01:20:45,054
She just had this...
1048
01:20:45,772 --> 01:20:47,977
I don't know.
1049
01:20:48,190 --> 01:20:50,764
It was like a light in her eyes.
1050
01:20:50,943 --> 01:20:52,603
You knew, she knew.
1051
01:20:56,281 --> 01:20:57,991
I shouldn't be saying this.
1052
01:20:58,285 --> 01:21:01,950
Oh, no, no. It's nice. Really.
1053
01:21:02,289 --> 01:21:03,487
It's fine.
1054
01:21:07,211 --> 01:21:09,582
- Weren't you going ashore?
- Huh?
1055
01:21:09,754 --> 01:21:13,885
- The eclipse. I don't wanna miss it.
- Yeah.
1056
01:21:14,802 --> 01:21:16,263
Listen.
1057
01:21:17,346 --> 01:21:20,217
It was great seeing you.
1058
01:21:20,390 --> 01:21:23,344
- You're really very, very nice.
- You too.
1059
01:21:23,518 --> 01:21:25,179
Thank you.
1060
01:21:25,355 --> 01:21:28,023
The last tender for shoredeparts in five minutes.
1061
01:21:28,190 --> 01:21:33,149
Please remember that all passengersmust return to ship by 4:30.
1062
01:21:56,554 --> 01:21:59,222
Liz, life drifts away...
1063
01:21:59,682 --> 01:22:03,348
...like grains of sand
through an hourglass.
1064
01:22:04,605 --> 01:22:08,981
Charlie, I'm sorry. I just don't get
what you're trying to say to me.
1065
01:22:09,151 --> 01:22:11,273
- Liz.
- Yeah?
1066
01:22:11,444 --> 01:22:14,649
Even though we've only known
each other a short time...
1067
01:22:14,825 --> 01:22:16,651
That's true. It's been short.
1068
01:22:16,868 --> 01:22:19,703
Liz, after a lifetime...
1069
01:22:19,872 --> 01:22:23,703
...of going through
a desert of humanity...
1070
01:22:23,875 --> 01:22:27,077
Charlie. Charlie, Charlie, Charlie, look!
1071
01:22:27,294 --> 01:22:29,454
Look, look, Charlie.
1072
01:22:30,048 --> 01:22:32,087
It's happening, we're here to see it.
1073
01:22:32,258 --> 01:22:34,928
Even though... Will you listen
to me for a minute?
1074
01:22:35,138 --> 01:22:39,430
Even though we're like two ships
passing through the night...
1075
01:22:39,600 --> 01:22:41,723
Why don't we get married, Charlie.
1076
01:22:41,894 --> 01:22:43,978
Good idea.
1077
01:22:48,235 --> 01:22:49,894
Liz, will you marry me?
1078
01:22:53,157 --> 01:22:57,070
- Is that a yes?
- Yeah, it's a yes.
1079
01:22:59,121 --> 01:23:02,654
- Oh.
- I think we're missing it, sweetheart.
1080
01:23:30,028 --> 01:23:33,315
Always and forever, kiddo.
1081
01:23:38,120 --> 01:23:42,948
- Oh, no.
- Maybe he's in the john.
1082
01:23:44,753 --> 01:23:45,795
Mom?
1083
01:23:46,422 --> 01:23:50,334
- Hi! How'd it go?
- Great. We got it all on video.
1084
01:23:50,507 --> 01:23:53,177
Fine. I won't speak
for the rest of our marriage.
1085
01:23:53,344 --> 01:23:55,383
Mom, how are you?
1086
01:23:55,555 --> 01:23:56,967
I'm going home.
1087
01:23:57,182 --> 01:23:58,676
Then we're going with you.
1088
01:23:59,310 --> 01:24:01,800
No, it's your anniversary.
1089
01:24:01,978 --> 01:24:03,603
- Celebrate it.
- Mom. Really.
1090
01:24:03,770 --> 01:24:05,023
Don't.
1091
01:24:07,652 --> 01:24:10,358
I wanna take care of myself.
1092
01:24:10,947 --> 01:24:12,856
Do you understand?
1093
01:24:14,367 --> 01:24:17,202
I need to take care of myself.
1094
01:24:35,097 --> 01:24:38,512
How'd it go with Daddy Warbucks?
1095
01:24:39,351 --> 01:24:40,975
We're getting married.
1096
01:24:42,189 --> 01:24:44,064
Hot damn!
1097
01:24:44,732 --> 01:24:48,149
I knew we'd snag one of them.
1098
01:24:49,780 --> 01:24:52,697
Now, here's what we're gonna do:
1099
01:24:52,866 --> 01:24:55,155
We can plan it...
1100
01:24:55,703 --> 01:24:58,193
- What the hell's the matter with you?
- Nothing.
1101
01:24:58,538 --> 01:25:00,248
Hallelujah.
1102
01:25:00,417 --> 01:25:04,708
I'm telling you, Liz, we are in clover.
1103
01:25:04,919 --> 01:25:09,381
- What do you figure he's worth?
- I don't know. I don't care.
1104
01:25:09,715 --> 01:25:12,289
Well, I don't know...
1105
01:25:13,097 --> 01:25:15,930
...but I do care.
We have spent our last two dimes...
1106
01:25:16,098 --> 01:25:19,515
- ...on this highfalutin stateroom.
- Ma.
1107
01:25:19,686 --> 01:25:22,258
- I like him.
- Good for you.
1108
01:25:22,479 --> 01:25:25,017
He's so sweet...
1109
01:25:25,191 --> 01:25:28,397
...and he's a decent man.
1110
01:25:28,570 --> 01:25:31,405
- Terrific.
- And he makes me laugh.
1111
01:25:32,533 --> 01:25:36,067
You not only snagged
yourself a millionaire...
1112
01:25:36,244 --> 01:25:38,285
...you're gonna have laughs
into the bargain.
1113
01:25:39,748 --> 01:25:40,792
Yeah.
1114
01:25:42,167 --> 01:25:44,706
- The last tender for shoredeparts in five minutes.
1115
01:25:44,879 --> 01:25:48,543
Please remember that all passengersmust return to ship by 4:30.
1116
01:25:48,716 --> 01:25:53,260
We will be raising the anchor at 5 p.m.And setting sail for Cozumel.
1117
01:25:53,430 --> 01:25:56,467
Those passengers remaining onboardare encouraged...
1118
01:25:56,642 --> 01:26:00,686
- He probably changed his mind.
- Oh, Mom.
1119
01:26:02,147 --> 01:26:04,058
- Hi, sweetheart.
- Hi.
1120
01:26:04,233 --> 01:26:06,320
Thank you.
1121
01:26:08,946 --> 01:26:10,615
Hello...
1122
01:26:12,241 --> 01:26:15,824
- ...Mother.
- Charlie, don't overshoot the runway.
1123
01:26:16,372 --> 01:26:18,578
I love family.
1124
01:26:18,749 --> 01:26:20,076
We better get going.
1125
01:26:21,292 --> 01:26:25,206
It's Mr. Gordon. Don't let this one
get away, now. He's a good one.
1126
01:26:25,504 --> 01:26:29,633
Mrs. Carruthers, Gil Godwyn,
this is Mavis and Liz LaDreche.
1127
01:26:29,801 --> 01:26:31,130
- LaBreche.
- LaBreche.
1128
01:26:31,345 --> 01:26:34,845
- Hi, Mavis.
- That's a familiar cologne, Mr. Gordon.
1129
01:26:35,141 --> 01:26:37,762
Thank you. You can pick it up anywhere.
1130
01:26:37,936 --> 01:26:40,970
I picked some up this morning
on my pillow.
1131
01:26:42,399 --> 01:26:44,143
This guy's hilarious.
1132
01:26:44,359 --> 01:26:46,767
Have you danced with Mr. Gordon?
1133
01:26:46,946 --> 01:26:49,567
- No, I'm looking forward to it.
- See you...
1134
01:26:49,740 --> 01:26:52,277
...with the rest of the dance hosts.
1135
01:26:55,620 --> 01:26:57,530
With the rest of the what?
1136
01:26:58,789 --> 01:27:02,206
He's always kidding around.
He thinks I should be a dance host.
1137
01:27:02,378 --> 01:27:06,291
I'm confused. You told me that
you were in mergers and acquisitions.
1138
01:27:06,464 --> 01:27:07,794
Well, he is.
1139
01:27:08,008 --> 01:27:11,591
His job is to acquire a partner
and merge with her on the dance floor.
1140
01:27:11,762 --> 01:27:14,301
Isn't that right, Gordon?
1141
01:27:14,933 --> 01:27:16,971
Liz, I was gonna mention this to you.
1142
01:27:17,185 --> 01:27:19,343
That would've been a good idea.
1143
01:27:19,646 --> 01:27:23,431
You see... Wait a minute, Liz.
Come back! Let me explain!
1144
01:27:23,608 --> 01:27:25,482
Where are you going, Mother?
1145
01:27:25,860 --> 01:27:28,102
I hate losers.
1146
01:27:29,613 --> 01:27:33,399
- Thanks a lot, pal.
- Gil.
1147
01:27:33,619 --> 01:27:35,612
- What happened?
- Where's your mother?
1148
01:27:35,788 --> 01:27:38,705
- She's not coming back onboard.
- She's going home.
1149
01:27:38,874 --> 01:27:41,081
- Where's my friend?
- Question of the day.
1150
01:27:58,437 --> 01:28:01,936
- What are you doing up here?
- Oh, hi.
1151
01:28:04,026 --> 01:28:05,686
Charlie, I'm...
1152
01:28:05,862 --> 01:28:08,696
I still love Suzie.
It seems to present a problem.
1153
01:28:08,864 --> 01:28:11,108
It's only a problem if you want it to be.
1154
01:28:11,325 --> 01:28:14,575
- Don't start with me, huh?
- Go on after Vivian. Go now.
1155
01:28:14,744 --> 01:28:17,911
- I hardly know her.
- You know her. You're crazy about her.
1156
01:28:18,081 --> 01:28:20,917
Question is, have you got
the balls to do anything?
1157
01:28:21,252 --> 01:28:24,787
- Well, I'm just not ready yet.
- Then get ready.
1158
01:28:25,006 --> 01:28:27,712
You're here, living, breathing.
You got a choice.
1159
01:28:27,886 --> 01:28:29,214
I can't do it.
1160
01:28:29,386 --> 01:28:31,545
Stop using Suzie as a safety net.
1161
01:28:31,722 --> 01:28:34,840
- Wait. Who are you to tell me...?
- She was my sister...
1162
01:28:35,016 --> 01:28:39,181
...before she was your wife. If she were
here, she'd tell you the same thing.
1163
01:28:39,356 --> 01:28:43,685
But she is not here now,
is she, Charlie? She's gone.
1164
01:28:43,902 --> 01:28:47,353
That's right, Herb. But you're not.
1165
01:28:56,874 --> 01:28:58,414
What am I doing here?
1166
01:28:58,749 --> 01:29:01,075
That's what I asked you
in the first place.
1167
01:29:01,294 --> 01:29:03,751
I am not authorized to give
that information.
1168
01:29:03,923 --> 01:29:07,256
I'm not authorized to throw
your ass overboard, but I will.
1169
01:29:07,427 --> 01:29:09,586
Now tell me where she is.
1170
01:29:09,763 --> 01:29:11,173
You better tell him.
1171
01:29:11,347 --> 01:29:15,725
This man's got a black belt in
some flung dung or one of them things.
1172
01:29:16,687 --> 01:29:18,145
Please.
1173
01:29:21,066 --> 01:29:25,193
All right, look. All I know is
we got a message she's flying home.
1174
01:29:25,361 --> 01:29:26,737
- She's flying?
- Yes.
1175
01:29:26,906 --> 01:29:28,732
- From where?
- I have no idea.
1176
01:29:29,325 --> 01:29:32,824
All right. Stop the car! Stop the car!
1177
01:29:32,994 --> 01:29:36,992
Stop the car! Stop... Stop the car.
1178
01:29:37,499 --> 01:29:39,539
Oh, my Lord.
1179
01:29:39,752 --> 01:29:41,165
Where in the...?
1180
01:29:44,466 --> 01:29:48,050
- Oh...
- I don't think you understand us.
1181
01:29:48,220 --> 01:29:51,006
We wanna go to the airport.
1182
01:29:51,181 --> 01:29:53,476
That thing?
1183
01:29:54,894 --> 01:29:56,221
- God.
- I get the luggage.
1184
01:29:56,394 --> 01:29:58,292
- No! Wait.
- Leave the luggage where it is.
1185
01:29:58,396 --> 01:30:01,399
Wait a minute. I see somebody.
1186
01:30:01,608 --> 01:30:02,859
Where?
1187
01:30:03,944 --> 01:30:06,316
Don't you move.
Stay right where you are!
1188
01:30:06,489 --> 01:30:07,984
Come on. Come on.
1189
01:30:08,199 --> 01:30:11,615
Come on. Excuse me,
but maybe you could help me.
1190
01:30:11,827 --> 01:30:16,904
This crazy cab driver's trying to tell
me that this is aeropuerto.
1191
01:30:17,165 --> 01:30:19,457
- Si.
- Oy-oy-oy.
1192
01:30:19,628 --> 01:30:21,750
I don't believe this.
1193
01:30:21,921 --> 01:30:26,085
All right, if this is the aeropuerto,
maybe you can show me a piloto!
1194
01:30:26,427 --> 01:30:29,096
- You're looking at him.
- Oh.
1195
01:30:29,262 --> 01:30:33,132
- What?
- You want a lift, sweetcakes?
1196
01:30:34,060 --> 01:30:36,764
God almighty.
Did you hear what he just called me?
1197
01:30:36,938 --> 01:30:38,267
Sure did.
1198
01:30:49,241 --> 01:30:51,319
- Come on.
- Are you crazy?
1199
01:30:51,494 --> 01:30:52,868
- What?
- This is dangerous.
1200
01:30:53,077 --> 01:30:54,905
What's the matter? Afraid to live?
1201
01:30:55,081 --> 01:30:59,293
Living is good.
It's dying I'm worried about.
1202
01:31:02,340 --> 01:31:06,468
Where are Gordon and Sullivan? Don't
give me that "code among comrades."
1203
01:31:06,635 --> 01:31:09,471
Sir, don't have the foggiest, sir.
1204
01:31:09,723 --> 01:31:11,601
Bollocks.
1205
01:31:12,975 --> 01:31:14,885
Pardon me. Pardon me.
1206
01:31:15,103 --> 01:31:17,143
This should be good.
1207
01:31:17,564 --> 01:31:19,971
- Five hundred.
- Are you out of your mind?
1208
01:31:20,150 --> 01:31:23,685
- That's too much money.
- That doesn't mean I ain't a good pilot.
1209
01:31:23,863 --> 01:31:29,367
- Has nothing to do with you being good.
- Look at this. It's J.F.K., all of a sudden.
1210
01:31:31,076 --> 01:31:33,747
I have an idea, Mama.
Just stay with me on it.
1211
01:31:33,914 --> 01:31:37,331
Good evening. I don't know you,
but this man over here says...
1212
01:31:37,502 --> 01:31:41,998
...he'll charge $500 to get to an airport.
Would you be interested in splitting it?
1213
01:31:42,173 --> 01:31:45,044
- Absolutely.
- You got a deal.
1214
01:31:45,342 --> 01:31:49,342
- You want to ride shotgun?
- Don't touch me.
1215
01:31:49,557 --> 01:31:52,343
- Get ready, kid.
- Where do we think we're going?
1216
01:31:52,976 --> 01:31:54,472
Oh, hi there.
1217
01:31:54,645 --> 01:31:56,969
We're just going scouting
for some icebergs.
1218
01:31:57,356 --> 01:32:00,143
You aren't going anywhere
except to your cabin...
1219
01:32:00,317 --> 01:32:04,065
- ...where you will stay.
- Listen, you sniveling little brownnose.
1220
01:32:04,237 --> 01:32:06,527
I have lived for 71 years.
I fought a war.
1221
01:32:06,698 --> 01:32:13,118
I buried my wife and I have survived
48 white sales at Gimbels.
1222
01:32:13,290 --> 01:32:17,583
If you think some fop like you is gonna
stop me, you got another thing coming.
1223
01:32:17,794 --> 01:32:19,871
How dare you speak to me that way.
1224
01:32:20,089 --> 01:32:23,291
- May I speak to you for a moment?
- No, you may not.
1225
01:32:25,137 --> 01:32:26,844
Way to go, Charlie!
1226
01:32:29,932 --> 01:32:31,676
I can't stop it, Charlie!
1227
01:32:32,809 --> 01:32:34,268
Hang on, Charlie!
1228
01:32:40,319 --> 01:32:42,987
Bon voyage, meathead!
1229
01:32:43,488 --> 01:32:48,648
I hope your boat capsizes
and you drown like bloody rats!
1230
01:32:48,827 --> 01:32:52,280
- Bye.
- When that old bag makes me VP...
1231
01:32:52,456 --> 01:32:58,791
...I'll see to it you never work another
cruise ship as long as you live!
1232
01:33:02,715 --> 01:33:04,425
Good evening, Ellen.
1233
01:33:05,886 --> 01:33:08,177
- What are you doing out here?
- You know...
1234
01:33:08,348 --> 01:33:12,640
...I find it hard to believe, but it
really is true. You are an asshole.
1235
01:33:12,809 --> 01:33:16,061
- I'm simply doing my job.
- Oh, you have no job.
1236
01:33:16,397 --> 01:33:18,724
You're fired. Mac...
1237
01:33:19,441 --> 01:33:21,351
...as of now, you are my new CD.
1238
01:33:23,153 --> 01:33:24,946
And what about me?
1239
01:33:25,117 --> 01:33:27,689
You're his friend.
1240
01:33:30,455 --> 01:33:32,446
- What?
- She's talking about...
1241
01:33:32,623 --> 01:33:35,328
...button that button, you little prick.
1242
01:33:36,252 --> 01:33:37,503
Prick.
1243
01:33:44,636 --> 01:33:47,008
You know what I don't see? Land.
1244
01:33:47,264 --> 01:33:48,675
It's there.
1245
01:33:48,850 --> 01:33:50,720
I see nothing but night.
1246
01:33:51,559 --> 01:33:53,717
I hope we don't get stranded.
1247
01:33:53,895 --> 01:33:56,137
You know, these are
shark-infested waters.
1248
01:33:56,316 --> 01:33:58,854
We're not gonna get stranded.
1249
01:33:59,027 --> 01:34:01,696
They say that the big ones
will swallow you whole.
1250
01:34:02,154 --> 01:34:03,779
Swallow my what?
1251
01:34:03,948 --> 01:34:06,701
You're not helping me, Charles.
1252
01:34:06,910 --> 01:34:10,159
- Here, let me do that.
- What makes you think you can do it?
1253
01:34:10,329 --> 01:34:12,903
- I'm taller.
- That has nothing to do with it.
1254
01:34:13,083 --> 01:34:15,207
It's in the wrist.
1255
01:34:17,754 --> 01:34:18,942
- You did it.
- We did it.
1256
01:34:19,047 --> 01:34:20,090
Yeah.
1257
01:34:23,717 --> 01:34:25,959
Well, it turns nicely.
1258
01:34:26,137 --> 01:34:29,839
Sit down, will you,
so I can see where I'm going.
1259
01:34:32,146 --> 01:34:34,137
- Are you from the cruise?
- Uh-huh.
1260
01:34:34,314 --> 01:34:35,642
I thought so.
1261
01:34:35,856 --> 01:34:37,350
Here he comes. Be careful!
1262
01:34:37,525 --> 01:34:40,646
- Evening, ladies. Welcome aboard.
- Oh, my God.
1263
01:34:40,820 --> 01:34:44,689
- And thank you for choosing Vaya Azul.
- Oh, my God.
1264
01:34:48,870 --> 01:34:51,243
Piece of shit!
1265
01:34:51,414 --> 01:34:54,165
Which of the Wright brothers
did you buy this from?
1266
01:34:54,334 --> 01:34:56,243
The one you dated in high school.
1267
01:34:56,418 --> 01:34:59,042
I feel so much better.
That's very reassuring.
1268
01:34:59,216 --> 01:35:01,884
We have a funny pilot.
1269
01:35:02,051 --> 01:35:04,458
- Hold it!
- What are you doing?
1270
01:35:04,637 --> 01:35:10,473
- I wanna get out of here, Ma.
- We're going! We're going!
1271
01:35:21,947 --> 01:35:24,070
- Stop!
- Take it easy, now. Oh, my Lord!
1272
01:35:27,411 --> 01:35:28,663
There!
1273
01:35:29,372 --> 01:35:31,412
A plane! There's a plane!
1274
01:35:31,625 --> 01:35:32,999
Is she in it?
1275
01:35:33,167 --> 01:35:36,952
I don't know. Do you see
a telescope attached to my head?
1276
01:35:37,171 --> 01:35:39,129
Come on, baby. Come on, let's go.
1277
01:35:39,340 --> 01:35:41,000
- Come on, baby.
- Ooh!
1278
01:35:41,175 --> 01:35:42,586
Come on.
1279
01:35:46,346 --> 01:35:48,425
- Wait!
- Wait, please. Hold it!
1280
01:35:48,643 --> 01:35:50,681
Stop! Please, stop!
1281
01:35:50,895 --> 01:35:53,384
Wait for us! Wait!
1282
01:35:53,605 --> 01:35:57,140
- It's Herbie and his friend!
- Wait, please. Wait.
1283
01:35:59,819 --> 01:36:01,490
Oh, God.
1284
01:36:02,157 --> 01:36:03,782
Hold it! Hold it!
1285
01:36:03,993 --> 01:36:06,286
Wait! Wait!
1286
01:36:07,454 --> 01:36:09,281
Wait a minute. Wait!
1287
01:36:10,373 --> 01:36:12,116
Down here!
1288
01:36:14,712 --> 01:36:19,041
- Hey! Hey!
- Come back!
1289
01:36:19,674 --> 01:36:24,170
She's not gonna hear a whistle,
for crying out loud. Hey!
1290
01:36:30,226 --> 01:36:32,979
Wait a minute. Wait a minute!
1291
01:36:33,147 --> 01:36:35,818
- What are you doing?
- You'll see.
1292
01:36:37,526 --> 01:36:38,856
What are you doing?
1293
01:36:43,658 --> 01:36:45,984
What are you gonna do,
shoot down the plane?
1294
01:36:47,662 --> 01:36:49,536
Oh, my God.
1295
01:36:58,465 --> 01:37:00,292
The flare!
1296
01:37:00,968 --> 01:37:02,296
See the flare?
1297
01:37:02,511 --> 01:37:05,512
- Now turn, for God's sake. See it?
- Turn around.
1298
01:37:05,682 --> 01:37:07,510
Come back!
1299
01:37:13,024 --> 01:37:15,431
Ensign Matowski.
1300
01:37:16,734 --> 01:37:19,864
- What?
- Herb.
1301
01:37:24,368 --> 01:37:27,202
Oh, my God. That can't be Charlie!
1302
01:37:30,125 --> 01:37:31,584
No way.
1303
01:37:33,793 --> 01:37:35,752
- Turn around.
- It's probably just...
1304
01:37:35,921 --> 01:37:38,628
- Turn? What is your problem?
- Just do it.
1305
01:37:42,553 --> 01:37:45,176
Turn! Yes. He's turning! Yes!
1306
01:37:45,349 --> 01:37:47,305
That's it. Way to go.
1307
01:38:15,798 --> 01:38:18,714
- Liz.
- Charlie.
1308
01:38:23,638 --> 01:38:26,178
- You're late.
- Yeah.
1309
01:38:26,352 --> 01:38:29,685
I had a little trouble getting started.
1310
01:38:40,822 --> 01:38:43,741
The plane was windy, you know.
1311
01:38:43,951 --> 01:38:45,611
- Yeah.
- Made my eyes water.
1312
01:38:45,787 --> 01:38:49,488
Yeah, it does that. Yeah. Look at that.
1313
01:38:55,547 --> 01:38:56,590
Liz.
1314
01:38:58,759 --> 01:39:02,094
From the first moment
I saw you on that ship...
1315
01:39:02,264 --> 01:39:05,051
...it was my intention to lie to you,
I swear.
1316
01:39:05,225 --> 01:39:06,768
That's sweet.
1317
01:39:06,935 --> 01:39:10,219
What I didn't intend
was falling in love with you.
1318
01:39:13,984 --> 01:39:16,278
Well, okay.
1319
01:39:16,737 --> 01:39:18,860
The deal is...
1320
01:39:19,198 --> 01:39:21,153
...that I'm as big a liar as you.
1321
01:39:21,365 --> 01:39:23,405
I highly doubt it.
1322
01:39:23,576 --> 01:39:25,535
I'm broke.
1323
01:39:27,081 --> 01:39:28,704
I'm sure you're exaggerating.
1324
01:39:29,459 --> 01:39:30,952
No, I'm not.
1325
01:39:33,380 --> 01:39:37,164
Not even a couple of
hundred thousand?
1326
01:39:37,967 --> 01:39:39,547
Not even.
1327
01:39:39,721 --> 01:39:42,389
Zip. Flat broke.
1328
01:39:46,518 --> 01:39:47,769
Sorry.
1329
01:39:48,061 --> 01:39:50,553
Door's open. It's not too late.
You can leave.
1330
01:39:50,815 --> 01:39:54,147
No, I don't wanna get out.
1331
01:39:54,902 --> 01:39:57,310
I don't wanna leave.
1332
01:40:01,450 --> 01:40:03,739
How long's all this gonna take?
1333
01:40:05,038 --> 01:40:08,039
Couple of gold diggers coming up empty.
1334
01:40:08,207 --> 01:40:09,999
That's terrific.
1335
01:40:10,211 --> 01:40:14,122
We still got the check from Carswell
for $ 18,000.
1336
01:40:14,296 --> 01:40:15,626
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
1337
01:40:15,840 --> 01:40:17,716
I saw you...
1338
01:40:18,719 --> 01:40:20,381
You taped it?
1339
01:40:23,058 --> 01:40:27,683
- What do I look like? A schmuck?
- The jury's still out on that one.
1340
01:40:27,896 --> 01:40:30,731
Shut up, Ma. We're keeping him.
1341
01:40:31,398 --> 01:40:33,486
Thank you.
1342
01:40:40,282 --> 01:40:43,119
Fifty dollars apiece,
for picking up the two studs.
1343
01:40:43,288 --> 01:40:46,322
They ought to give you 50 bucks
for calling them studs.
1344
01:40:46,498 --> 01:40:50,412
Herbie, lend me 50 bucks,
will you? All I got is this check.
1345
01:40:50,584 --> 01:40:54,087
You're not getting a nickel
out of me, Charlie.
1346
01:43:51,569 --> 01:43:53,236
- Let me just say...
- Would you...?
1347
01:43:55,864 --> 01:43:59,151
You got any crack on you?
1348
01:44:04,000 --> 01:44:07,250
Instead... Instead of...
1349
01:44:07,419 --> 01:44:10,753
Instead of paying for this cruise...
1350
01:44:14,384 --> 01:44:15,629
Come with me.
1351
01:44:15,802 --> 01:44:17,133
See, we go to shmeer...
1352
01:44:18,514 --> 01:44:20,839
And then you call a...
1353
01:44:25,688 --> 01:44:28,604
Are you talking
about humpback whales?
1354
01:44:28,773 --> 01:44:30,982
I was talking about humping, actually.
1355
01:44:31,278 --> 01:44:33,571
Ah! Ah! Ah!
1356
01:44:34,574 --> 01:44:39,400
What hint? No, I just found us a couple
of chest butchers that'll whip it out.
1357
01:44:43,792 --> 01:44:45,284
- Where were you?
- Well...
1358
01:44:48,296 --> 01:44:51,332
A passenger requested an escort, sir.
1359
01:44:51,507 --> 01:44:55,492
- Indeed. A likely excuse.
- So I slipped her one in the lifeboat.
1360
01:45:04,988 --> 01:45:07,215
Oh, shit...
1361
01:45:09,484 --> 01:45:12,568
Oh, look who's here.
1362
01:45:20,079 --> 01:45:21,361
You better tell him.
1363
01:45:21,539 --> 01:45:25,288
This man's got a martial arts thing
in black belt shmeer.
1364
01:45:27,629 --> 01:45:31,921
So if you think that some snot nose
little fop like you is gonna stop me...
1365
01:45:32,091 --> 01:45:33,670
...then pinch me, Walter.
1366
01:45:34,345 --> 01:45:37,844
So if you think some snotty little fop
like you is gonna change me or...
1367
01:45:38,015 --> 01:45:41,349
...* * * * me up,
then I'll * * *k it up myself.
1368
01:45:42,851 --> 01:45:47,645
Even though we've known each other
for a short time...
1369
01:45:50,987 --> 01:45:53,693
...the moon is up your ass.
1370
01:45:53,949 --> 01:45:55,775
Keep looking at Dyan.
1371
01:45:55,951 --> 01:45:59,486
- Don't try to grab my thing.
- Oh, isn't that attractive?
1372
01:45:59,747 --> 01:46:01,620
I wouldn't hold my thing.
1373
01:46:01,956 --> 01:46:03,367
What about Walter's hand?
1374
01:46:06,044 --> 01:46:08,996
I really had a good time.
1375
01:46:09,143 --> 01:46:12,379
- I wanna tell you something.
- Tell me, tell me.
1376
01:46:12,528 --> 01:46:17,422
I have never had a better piece of ass.
1377
01:46:18,242 --> 01:46:19,683
Whoo-hoo!
1378
01:46:23,772 --> 01:46:25,431
Did I hear "cut"?
1379
01:46:30,070 --> 01:46:31,313
Dismissed.
108000
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