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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:10,730 --> 00:00:14,270 This is Jeff Lemko Production. 2 00:00:51,690 --> 00:00:56,970 The world is in trouble. We're under attack by flesh -eating zombies. It's 3 00:00:56,970 --> 00:00:57,970 totally whack. 4 00:00:58,050 --> 00:01:00,990 They're breaking down doors and smashing through walls. 5 00:01:01,330 --> 00:01:06,110 They're in the supermarkets and the shopping malls. Disgusted by what the 6 00:01:06,110 --> 00:01:07,110 race has become. 7 00:01:07,530 --> 00:01:12,370 A hero emerged to fight the zombie scum. He slashed over their cash and crushed 8 00:01:12,370 --> 00:01:13,430 their skulls to the ground. 9 00:01:13,730 --> 00:01:18,630 And he's also the reason all bullets have his name on them. That's Tom, the 10 00:01:18,630 --> 00:01:20,890 amazing zombie killer. 11 00:01:23,370 --> 00:01:28,470 So if you're a zombie, don't get in his path, or you're gonna get a total 12 00:01:28,470 --> 00:01:34,670 bloodbath. Don't even try, cause you can't win, to strike you down like a 13 00:01:34,670 --> 00:01:35,670 bowling pin. 14 00:01:35,970 --> 00:01:37,090 Don't call the cops, 15 00:01:37,810 --> 00:01:40,210 don't call the lawyer, he can't be stopped. 16 00:02:56,270 --> 00:02:57,530 because you're on fire. 17 00:02:58,270 --> 00:02:59,270 That's right, guys. 18 00:02:59,310 --> 00:03:02,590 When you've been slinging balls around as long as I have, you're bound to knock 19 00:03:02,590 --> 00:03:03,590 down a couple of pins. 20 00:03:04,150 --> 00:03:05,630 Adam, 10th frame, you're up. 21 00:03:07,050 --> 00:03:08,530 What, are you off in your own world again? 22 00:03:08,830 --> 00:03:11,110 Come on, Adam, get your head in the game. 23 00:03:11,350 --> 00:03:12,670 Oh, I'm sorry. 24 00:03:13,110 --> 00:03:16,990 Yeah, Dario from the Slashers is up next, and he's one rough customer. 25 00:03:17,350 --> 00:03:19,090 He's the best bowler in the league. 26 00:03:55,920 --> 00:03:56,920 Holy shit. 27 00:03:57,240 --> 00:03:58,240 We're screwed. 28 00:03:58,440 --> 00:04:03,400 Yeah, let's just go home. No, Adam, you can do this. We know you can, right, 29 00:04:03,500 --> 00:04:05,260 guys? Come on, let's huddle up. 30 00:04:05,850 --> 00:04:10,090 Really? You guys think I can get a strike? Three. What? We need three 31 00:04:10,090 --> 00:04:13,550 win this thing. Yeah, and if you don't, we won't qualify for the national 32 00:04:13,550 --> 00:04:14,910 bowling tournament in Hawaii. 33 00:04:15,670 --> 00:04:19,450 Adam, you can do this. It's just like having sex with your grandmother. Just 34 00:04:19,450 --> 00:04:20,450 don't think about it. 35 00:04:21,649 --> 00:04:22,650 Ahem. 36 00:04:23,290 --> 00:04:27,670 If you amateurs wouldn't mind speeding things up, I'm losing my patience. 37 00:04:27,910 --> 00:04:30,890 The only thing you're losing, Dario, is this bowling match. 38 00:04:31,110 --> 00:04:34,230 Your team will never beat Dario in the slashes. 39 00:04:35,600 --> 00:04:36,920 What a lame name. 40 00:04:37,260 --> 00:04:41,200 Yeah, Dario and the Slashers. Sounds like that band from Full House. 41 00:04:41,420 --> 00:04:45,460 Yeah. Why don't you go ass to mouth with Kimmy Gibbler over there? Hey, fuck 42 00:04:45,460 --> 00:04:46,460 you. 43 00:04:47,540 --> 00:04:49,480 Just some professional advice. 44 00:04:49,740 --> 00:04:52,040 You need to keep your mind in the game, son. 45 00:04:52,400 --> 00:04:56,000 Don't listen to Dario. He's just trying to psych you out. You just wish your 46 00:04:56,000 --> 00:04:59,940 team was good enough to be sponsored by Ernie Weiss's used car emporium. 47 00:05:00,180 --> 00:05:02,260 Because Ernie Weiss is slashing prices. 48 00:05:04,800 --> 00:05:05,579 That's your slogan? 49 00:05:05,580 --> 00:05:07,160 Oh, how cheesy. 50 00:05:20,620 --> 00:05:25,200 Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. 51 00:05:25,560 --> 00:05:27,660 Yeah, you're going down, Dario. 52 00:05:28,620 --> 00:05:33,520 The game's not over till it's over. Just a little advice from a pro bowler, pro 53 00:05:33,520 --> 00:05:34,520 bono, bro. 54 00:05:34,800 --> 00:05:37,920 Hey, why don't you go probe your boner alone, homo? 55 00:05:38,840 --> 00:05:39,940 Ah, jealousy. 56 00:05:40,360 --> 00:05:42,440 I get paid for my passions. 57 00:05:42,700 --> 00:05:46,580 Almost forgot what it was like not to be sponsored by Ernie Weiss's used car 58 00:05:46,580 --> 00:05:49,940 emporium. Or Ernie Hawk's autos at wholesale prices. 59 00:05:50,660 --> 00:05:54,560 I prefer your mom's wholesale prices. Two for the price of one. 60 00:05:54,780 --> 00:05:55,780 Bing! 61 00:06:15,790 --> 00:06:18,750 Turkey, turkey, turkey, turkey. 62 00:06:22,390 --> 00:06:28,410 Your weenies are the only turkeys around this place. Prepare to get stuffed. 63 00:06:29,110 --> 00:06:30,130 What are you talking about? 64 00:06:30,450 --> 00:06:34,410 Adam's the best bowler in the league. Better than his grandfather in his 65 00:06:34,690 --> 00:06:35,730 His grandfather? 66 00:06:36,130 --> 00:06:40,610 All that's left of his grandfather is that cheap trophy back by the men's 67 00:06:40,730 --> 00:06:44,330 A pathetic waste of plastic for a pathetic waste of semen. 68 00:06:44,810 --> 00:06:47,710 Hey, don't talk about my gramps that way. You about to cry. 69 00:06:48,190 --> 00:06:51,310 He's just trying to break your focus. Just strike this last frame. 70 00:06:51,710 --> 00:06:52,710 That'll shut him up. 71 00:06:53,070 --> 00:06:55,370 Dude, look at fucking Adam. He's about to snap. 72 00:06:55,690 --> 00:06:58,270 Bro, it's about to happen sometime. What a fucking freak. 73 00:06:58,510 --> 00:06:59,510 Yeah. 74 00:06:59,670 --> 00:07:03,870 Hey, my grandpa might not have been sponsored by any big business, but he 75 00:07:03,870 --> 00:07:06,170 still the best bowler this town has ever seen. 76 00:07:06,590 --> 00:07:08,390 Well, do him proud, Junior. 77 00:07:31,920 --> 00:07:32,920 Cut the bullshit. 78 00:07:36,280 --> 00:07:41,160 Whose bowling ball hit my balls in my bowling alley? 79 00:07:44,040 --> 00:07:47,660 And what in the damn hell is Adam doing on my lane? 80 00:07:48,220 --> 00:07:49,280 Jeez, sir. 81 00:07:49,580 --> 00:07:51,140 Whose ball is this? 82 00:07:51,440 --> 00:07:57,160 That stupid smiley face bowling ball belongs to Adam, the amazing zombie 83 00:07:58,800 --> 00:08:00,220 I'm no detective. 84 00:08:01,360 --> 00:08:04,080 Detective, but I would say that there's evidence. 85 00:08:05,000 --> 00:08:06,700 I'd say so too, Jebediah. 86 00:08:07,220 --> 00:08:10,880 And I'd say that these here boys are disturbing the peace. 87 00:08:11,600 --> 00:08:16,440 Shoot, my third beer was just kicking in. I'm terribly sorry you have to deal 88 00:08:16,440 --> 00:08:19,660 with these petty disturbances, especially when you're off duty. 89 00:08:20,120 --> 00:08:25,340 Young man, crime is never off duty. 90 00:08:25,840 --> 00:08:27,980 I'm sorry. Sorry, excuse me. 91 00:08:29,299 --> 00:08:31,280 Adam ain't normally one to cheat. 92 00:08:32,059 --> 00:08:34,380 But Dario's team is sponsored. 93 00:08:34,960 --> 00:08:37,320 And Ernie does do a lot for the alley. 94 00:08:37,659 --> 00:08:38,960 Oh, I catch your drift. 95 00:08:39,200 --> 00:08:43,039 I'll call my Uncle Ernie and have him take care of any damages that may have 96 00:08:43,039 --> 00:08:46,580 occurred on the condition that we never have to deal with riffraff like this 97 00:08:46,580 --> 00:08:47,579 ever again. 98 00:08:47,580 --> 00:08:51,660 They started the fight. Adam had nothing to do with it. Officer, please don't 99 00:08:51,660 --> 00:08:52,740 listen to him. He's a liar. 100 00:08:54,160 --> 00:08:55,160 And an asshole. 101 00:08:55,440 --> 00:08:57,780 I don't know what's gotten into you zombie killers. 102 00:08:58,480 --> 00:08:59,880 But I have to set the example. 103 00:09:00,300 --> 00:09:01,300 You're 86. 104 00:09:01,780 --> 00:09:02,840 Banned for life. 105 00:09:03,580 --> 00:09:05,140 Sorry, boys. You heard Tab. 106 00:09:05,660 --> 00:09:06,660 Get on out. 107 00:09:06,760 --> 00:09:10,600 But Tab, you and Grandfather... Your grandfather should have quit while he's 108 00:09:10,600 --> 00:09:13,000 ahead. And now you should do the same. 109 00:09:13,920 --> 00:09:15,360 Get off my property. 110 00:09:16,580 --> 00:09:23,420 Only... God damn 111 00:09:23,420 --> 00:09:24,420 it. 112 00:09:26,600 --> 00:09:27,600 What? 113 00:09:49,770 --> 00:09:50,770 I can't believe we're banned. 114 00:09:51,090 --> 00:09:54,470 Now we'll never get to go to the national bowling tournament in Hawaii. 115 00:09:56,430 --> 00:09:59,070 And don't forget to take this piece of trash with you. 116 00:10:02,030 --> 00:10:04,910 You'll always be a loser, Adam. I'm gonna beat your ass. 117 00:10:05,650 --> 00:10:09,110 I'm gonna beat you up. Not recommended, okay? 118 00:10:09,570 --> 00:10:13,390 Guys, we just need to calm down. We're all still a little heated from the 119 00:10:13,930 --> 00:10:15,530 We know we played an honest match. 120 00:10:16,040 --> 00:10:19,860 It was good competition until those bastards cheated. God damn it. But 121 00:10:19,860 --> 00:10:21,340 nothing we can do about that. 122 00:10:22,480 --> 00:10:27,640 Let's just go home, have a few beers, reflect on the evening, formulate a game 123 00:10:27,640 --> 00:10:29,780 plan. No, no, no, no. My head hurts. 124 00:10:30,020 --> 00:10:33,900 You could have a concussion. More reason to have a beer. I don't think that's a 125 00:10:33,900 --> 00:10:37,420 good idea. Besides, my girlfriend's waiting for me, and I don't want to keep 126 00:10:37,420 --> 00:10:39,600 waiting. So you're just going to ditch your teammates? 127 00:10:40,020 --> 00:10:41,020 Don't put it like that. 128 00:10:42,060 --> 00:10:43,200 I'll see you guys tomorrow. 129 00:10:43,930 --> 00:10:45,610 Remember we're going to go see that new Dr. 130 00:10:45,870 --> 00:10:47,150 Chaotica's house and talk to zombies? 131 00:10:47,570 --> 00:10:48,610 I promise. 132 00:10:49,370 --> 00:10:52,610 Okay? I just need to go to bed and get some rest. 133 00:10:52,910 --> 00:10:55,830 It could be dangerous for you to fall asleep if you had a concussion. 134 00:10:56,170 --> 00:10:57,830 Your brain could be damaged. 135 00:10:58,270 --> 00:11:01,670 He said to bed, not to sleep, if you know what I mean, idiot. 136 00:11:02,630 --> 00:11:04,330 Adam, you've had a rough day. 137 00:11:04,690 --> 00:11:07,090 What better way to end it than with some titties? 138 00:11:34,980 --> 00:11:36,400 How was your night, honey? 139 00:11:37,920 --> 00:11:40,000 We got in a fight tonight with the Flashers. 140 00:11:40,400 --> 00:11:44,960 And they kicked us out. And they won't even let us back in. And stupid Dario 141 00:11:44,960 --> 00:11:47,980 the one who started it in the first place. And they took out my grandpa's 142 00:11:47,980 --> 00:11:48,980 trophy. 143 00:11:49,740 --> 00:11:50,740 My head hurts. 144 00:11:51,460 --> 00:11:53,500 Well, that's why you should have stayed with me tonight. 145 00:11:53,720 --> 00:11:55,260 I would have taken care of you. 146 00:11:55,640 --> 00:11:56,760 They needed me. 147 00:11:57,160 --> 00:12:02,280 My team needed me. I didn't even get one punch off. I just ended up looking like 148 00:12:02,280 --> 00:12:06,240 Daria's little bitch. Fuck! Maybe if you got control of your temper, you 149 00:12:06,240 --> 00:12:07,700 wouldn't get yourself into these fights. 150 00:12:07,940 --> 00:12:09,940 Well, they started it. Oh, real mature. 151 00:12:10,300 --> 00:12:11,660 Grow up and stop yelling at me. 152 00:12:11,880 --> 00:12:14,460 I wasn't yelling. You are right now. 153 00:12:21,200 --> 00:12:24,600 You sound like a brain -dead zombie from one of those stupid movies you like so 154 00:12:24,600 --> 00:12:27,520 much. Now let's not say anything that we're going to regret later on. 155 00:12:28,280 --> 00:12:29,300 Listen, I'm sorry. 156 00:12:29,540 --> 00:12:30,640 I shouldn't have said anything. 157 00:12:31,300 --> 00:12:34,840 So you'd rather box it all up in that thick skull of yours than let the truth 158 00:12:34,840 --> 00:12:35,739 out, huh? 159 00:12:35,740 --> 00:12:38,360 Yeah, real good strategy to avoid intimacy. 160 00:12:39,920 --> 00:12:41,640 Strategy? Yeah, strategy. 161 00:12:42,280 --> 00:12:45,760 You think life is just one big game that you've always got to win. 162 00:12:46,020 --> 00:12:49,660 Whether it's an argument, or a video game, or some... 163 00:12:49,920 --> 00:12:50,940 Stupid bowling match. 164 00:12:51,360 --> 00:12:54,140 Well, there are some things in life that are more important. Like what? 165 00:12:54,360 --> 00:12:57,060 Like me. You would never get in a fight for me. 166 00:12:57,380 --> 00:12:58,380 Oh, that's not true. 167 00:12:58,640 --> 00:12:59,740 I'd fight for you. 168 00:13:00,060 --> 00:13:02,560 Baby, I'd kill for you. 169 00:13:03,260 --> 00:13:04,520 I don't believe you. 170 00:13:04,840 --> 00:13:07,400 You never do anything to show you're committed to me. 171 00:13:07,720 --> 00:13:08,860 I just took you fishing. 172 00:13:09,880 --> 00:13:12,360 But you can't wear a little black dress to fish. 173 00:13:12,780 --> 00:13:14,880 You could have worn it when we played mini golf. 174 00:13:15,800 --> 00:13:19,260 Come on, what about that one time I let you kill me in laser tag, huh? 175 00:13:20,240 --> 00:13:23,160 You are so out of touch with reality, Adam. 176 00:13:23,800 --> 00:13:26,420 Those are all things you do with your guy friends? 177 00:13:27,320 --> 00:13:29,080 I want to do something really special. 178 00:13:30,000 --> 00:13:33,260 Anything. Take me to that new sushi place down the street. 179 00:13:33,500 --> 00:13:34,880 But that's just expensive. 180 00:13:35,260 --> 00:13:41,500 I mean... And, of course, baby. 181 00:13:41,860 --> 00:13:42,860 Anything. 182 00:13:43,760 --> 00:13:44,760 Tomorrow night. 183 00:13:45,360 --> 00:13:46,600 Just the two of us. 184 00:13:46,900 --> 00:13:47,900 Oh, Adam. 185 00:13:48,270 --> 00:13:50,350 You're just crazy about me, aren't you? 186 00:13:52,010 --> 00:13:53,050 No, no, no. 187 00:13:53,670 --> 00:13:54,670 Not tonight. 188 00:13:55,530 --> 00:13:58,790 I've got a big day of shopping ahead of me tomorrow for our date. 189 00:14:00,330 --> 00:14:03,270 I don't mind if you look at me while you finish yourself off. 190 00:14:03,670 --> 00:14:06,770 Just try to keep it quiet and don't get any on me. 191 00:14:10,570 --> 00:14:13,950 Why do people not thank God? 192 00:14:14,690 --> 00:14:16,370 God, almighty God! 193 00:14:16,970 --> 00:14:18,330 Oh, mighty God! 194 00:14:18,850 --> 00:14:21,930 Without God, we would not be here! 195 00:14:22,670 --> 00:14:28,390 Pray before... Ernie Weiss here. Ernie Weiss' used car employee, and we are 196 00:14:28,390 --> 00:14:33,110 proud to sponsor Dario and the Slashers, the best damn bowling team this side of 197 00:14:33,110 --> 00:14:36,290 the Mississippi. Let's see what they've got to say about Ernie's used car deals. 198 00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:40,810 My uncle Ernie Weiss wants you to buy this car. 199 00:14:42,330 --> 00:14:44,650 Buy this beauty for $5 .25. 200 00:14:46,120 --> 00:14:48,600 Take advantage of our government program. 201 00:14:49,700 --> 00:14:51,980 We slash the competitors' prices. 202 00:14:53,780 --> 00:14:54,780 Slashing prices. 203 00:14:54,940 --> 00:14:55,940 Slashing prices. 204 00:14:56,020 --> 00:14:57,860 Ernie Vices. Slashing prices. 205 00:14:58,280 --> 00:15:02,200 So come on down to Ernie Vices' used car for him, and we'll make you a killer 206 00:15:02,200 --> 00:15:03,200 deal! 207 00:15:11,040 --> 00:15:15,120 Couldn't touch that dial and change the channel and leave me, Oriola, the 208 00:15:15,120 --> 00:15:17,900 Twilight Temptress of terror all alone now, would you? 209 00:15:18,180 --> 00:15:19,620 Of course not. 210 00:15:19,900 --> 00:15:23,860 Why, if you're up this late at night watching this crappy movie, you are 211 00:15:23,860 --> 00:15:24,860 probably desperate. 212 00:15:24,980 --> 00:15:27,460 You can't get a girl to put up for you in real life. 213 00:15:27,680 --> 00:15:32,920 So your misogynistic subconscious begins to manufacture ideas and fantasies of 214 00:15:32,920 --> 00:15:34,840 women's humiliation and torture. 215 00:15:35,600 --> 00:15:37,820 Add to that some bodily fluids. 216 00:15:38,430 --> 00:15:41,630 namely blood, and you've got something to stir up, though. 217 00:15:42,430 --> 00:15:48,170 Well, I'm to your rescue, my darling viewers, for I've got a healthy helping 218 00:15:48,170 --> 00:15:49,930 young women in peril for you. 219 00:15:50,390 --> 00:15:52,010 Enjoy, you perverts! 220 00:16:25,840 --> 00:16:29,360 You're that girl from the bowling alley, right? Yeah, that's me. My name's 221 00:16:29,360 --> 00:16:32,540 Allison, but everyone calls me Allie because I work at the bowling alley. 222 00:16:33,740 --> 00:16:37,020 Thank God it's just you. I was beginning to think that the undead were walking 223 00:16:37,020 --> 00:16:37,859 the earth. 224 00:16:37,860 --> 00:16:38,980 What are you doing here? 225 00:16:39,500 --> 00:16:41,700 Oh, this is my shortcut home from work. 226 00:16:42,740 --> 00:16:44,020 Are you okay? 227 00:16:44,320 --> 00:16:45,940 Yeah, my head still hurts. 228 00:16:46,380 --> 00:16:47,820 I wasn't able to sleep. 229 00:16:48,100 --> 00:16:51,500 There was nothing on TV, so I thought I'd go for a walk out here. 230 00:16:52,200 --> 00:16:53,460 Is that your grandfather? 231 00:16:54,760 --> 00:17:00,300 I've wasted my entire life trying to be as good of a bowler as Grant when I 232 00:17:00,300 --> 00:17:05,099 could have been studying to be a doctor or going to film school or climbing 233 00:17:05,099 --> 00:17:09,780 Mount Everest. I don't know. Adam, you are a great bowler. You are so much 234 00:17:09,780 --> 00:17:11,819 better than Dario and all the other alley cats. 235 00:17:12,020 --> 00:17:15,060 There is nothing wrong with wanting to rise above the... 236 00:17:15,390 --> 00:17:19,569 ordinary, mindless masses to dominate the game. Being a bowling champ doesn't 237 00:17:19,569 --> 00:17:21,109 really make you a distinguished person. 238 00:17:21,410 --> 00:17:24,190 Your teammates would probably disagree with you on that one. Well, obviously. 239 00:17:24,829 --> 00:17:29,150 I don't know why any of us were under the illusion that qualifying for a 240 00:17:29,150 --> 00:17:32,690 national bowling tournament in Hawaii was ever worth fighting for. Well, at 241 00:17:32,690 --> 00:17:34,650 least it was something you could all believe in together. 242 00:17:37,790 --> 00:17:40,510 Anyway, I'd probably better let you go. No, no. 243 00:17:42,030 --> 00:17:43,730 Uh, I'm... 244 00:17:44,030 --> 00:17:45,030 I'm okay. 245 00:17:45,930 --> 00:17:50,690 Listen, a little girl like you shouldn't be walking alone at night anyway, 246 00:17:50,770 --> 00:17:51,770 right? 247 00:17:51,910 --> 00:17:55,410 What, you think you're going to protect me? I watched you get your ass kicked 248 00:17:55,410 --> 00:17:57,250 tonight, bucko. I don't exactly feel protected. 249 00:17:57,650 --> 00:17:59,030 Well, then you can protect me. 250 00:18:00,030 --> 00:18:01,030 From what? 251 00:18:01,530 --> 00:18:02,550 I don't know. 252 00:18:03,870 --> 00:18:06,470 Perhaps the ordinary mindless masses? 253 00:18:25,870 --> 00:18:28,190 Stephanie, Tiffany, and Brittany are here. We're going to the mall. I've got 254 00:18:28,190 --> 00:18:29,550 your checkbook. Hope you don't mind. Bye! 255 00:18:29,790 --> 00:18:30,790 What? 256 00:18:32,690 --> 00:18:33,690 Wait. 257 00:18:35,650 --> 00:18:36,650 Emily, 258 00:18:38,630 --> 00:18:40,430 what the hell took you so long? 259 00:18:40,670 --> 00:18:42,290 I had to say goodbye to my boyfriend. 260 00:18:43,230 --> 00:18:45,070 He's so clingy in the mornings. 261 00:18:45,390 --> 00:18:47,370 Just because he wants a blowjob. 262 00:18:47,990 --> 00:18:49,070 You slut. 263 00:19:01,320 --> 00:19:02,420 Let's walk a little slower, ladies. 264 00:19:03,900 --> 00:19:04,900 I'm Britney. 265 00:19:05,580 --> 00:19:07,220 I bet you'd be so wet. 266 00:19:08,160 --> 00:19:09,520 Fingers would get all pruney. 267 00:19:10,200 --> 00:19:13,460 I'd be like doing you with a ribbed condom with my fingers. 268 00:19:14,640 --> 00:19:15,640 There you go. 269 00:19:16,540 --> 00:19:17,540 There you go. 270 00:19:18,760 --> 00:19:20,480 Oh, you're slowing down your walking. 271 00:19:21,940 --> 00:19:23,920 Fucking, oh, I can't believe it. 272 00:19:24,400 --> 00:19:25,640 Yeah, there we are. 273 00:19:25,940 --> 00:19:26,940 Here we go. 274 00:19:27,220 --> 00:19:28,220 Here we go. 275 00:19:33,550 --> 00:19:34,550 Oh, fuck. 276 00:19:36,610 --> 00:19:37,610 Hey, dude. 277 00:19:37,650 --> 00:19:39,210 Hey. Yeah, we still on for tonight? 278 00:19:39,610 --> 00:19:41,430 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, sure. 279 00:19:41,750 --> 00:19:43,870 Dr. Kiatica's house of toxic zombies. 280 00:19:44,150 --> 00:19:48,310 I'm reading in Fangoria that they did research on actual dead bodies to get 281 00:19:48,310 --> 00:19:49,109 makeup right. 282 00:19:49,110 --> 00:19:51,410 Supposed to be the most realistic zombie movie ever. 283 00:19:52,190 --> 00:19:53,190 Huh, realistic? 284 00:19:53,430 --> 00:19:56,430 Yeah, hey, me and the fellas will see you down at the theater at nine, okay? 285 00:19:56,830 --> 00:19:58,210 Yeah, see you later. 286 00:20:02,590 --> 00:20:04,420 Oh, shit. Shit! My date! 287 00:20:10,800 --> 00:20:12,120 Look at the car. 288 00:20:17,620 --> 00:20:19,720 Top of the morning to you, ladies. 289 00:20:22,320 --> 00:20:27,320 Steph, Britt, Tiff. You're all looking fine today, but who's your little friend 290 00:20:27,320 --> 00:20:30,000 there? I'm... Emily. 291 00:20:30,340 --> 00:20:31,340 Emily, huh? 292 00:20:31,830 --> 00:20:32,890 Don't I know you from somewhere? 293 00:20:33,150 --> 00:20:35,890 Come on, girls. We have to get going if we're going to beat the crowds. We gotta 294 00:20:35,890 --> 00:20:36,890 go. 295 00:20:40,290 --> 00:20:41,470 Hey, get off the car! 296 00:20:41,710 --> 00:20:42,710 Fuck you! 297 00:20:48,330 --> 00:20:53,150 So, Emily is it, huh? I could have sworn I know you from somewhere. 298 00:20:53,370 --> 00:20:54,910 I never forget a face. 299 00:20:55,290 --> 00:20:56,450 She's Adam's girlfriend? 300 00:20:56,910 --> 00:21:01,270 Yeah. How did a loser like that end up with such a fine woman like yourself? 301 00:21:01,770 --> 00:21:03,310 We're only kind of dating. 302 00:21:03,730 --> 00:21:05,150 It's not that serious. 303 00:21:05,470 --> 00:21:10,350 A woman like you needs somebody with a nice car who can afford classy dates. 304 00:21:10,550 --> 00:21:15,150 Someone who's sophisticated and smooth like... Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! 305 00:21:17,450 --> 00:21:19,710 Can't you read the sign we're working here? 306 00:21:20,030 --> 00:21:21,030 What the hell? 307 00:21:49,230 --> 00:21:50,430 Is Uncle Ernie in his office? 308 00:21:50,650 --> 00:21:51,650 Yeah, you bet, Dario. 309 00:21:51,730 --> 00:21:55,870 He'll be so happy to see you. You always dress so nice. 310 00:21:56,630 --> 00:21:57,850 Yeah, great. Thanks. 311 00:22:00,330 --> 00:22:01,490 He's so awesome. 312 00:22:02,370 --> 00:22:03,370 Yeah. 313 00:22:08,890 --> 00:22:11,830 So I heard you took care of Adam's bowling team last night. 314 00:22:12,270 --> 00:22:14,890 Yeah, we got rid of them with minimal damage. 315 00:22:15,150 --> 00:22:16,470 Just like his grandfather. 316 00:22:16,830 --> 00:22:18,390 He refuses to lose. 317 00:22:19,790 --> 00:22:24,010 Yeah, well, he's dead, and you just say the word, and... It's not necessary. 318 00:22:24,650 --> 00:22:27,790 I don't want to attract any more attention from the police than I got to. 319 00:22:27,790 --> 00:22:31,830 police? The police in this town are a joke. Why any fool could get away with 320 00:22:31,830 --> 00:22:33,190 murder around this town? 321 00:22:33,410 --> 00:22:37,110 Yeah, but it's not necessary. Now with Adam and his team out of the running, 322 00:22:37,190 --> 00:22:40,810 there's nothing between you and the national bowling tournament in Hawaii. 323 00:22:41,370 --> 00:22:43,990 Do you know what that kind of advertising can do for this company? 324 00:22:45,270 --> 00:22:46,270 Lots of money. 325 00:22:49,370 --> 00:22:49,770 The 326 00:22:49,770 --> 00:22:56,570 new 327 00:22:56,570 --> 00:23:00,390 dress you bought is pretty sexy, honey. I got soy sauce on it. Oh. 328 00:23:01,170 --> 00:23:04,410 Well, other than that, did you like the restaurant? They served our food so 329 00:23:04,410 --> 00:23:05,670 cold. It's sushi. 330 00:23:05,970 --> 00:23:07,070 It's supposed to be like that. 331 00:23:07,270 --> 00:23:08,430 Oh, our food's so cold. 332 00:23:08,850 --> 00:23:09,850 Whoa, hey! 333 00:23:10,000 --> 00:23:12,100 You're the one who wanted to go there in the first place. 334 00:23:12,460 --> 00:23:15,440 I just did what you wanted to do. What I want to do? 335 00:23:15,860 --> 00:23:19,160 So you're saying going on a date with me isn't what you want to do? No, but, 336 00:23:19,380 --> 00:23:23,560 well... I just want to spend quality time with you, but you're too selfish to 337 00:23:23,560 --> 00:23:25,720 want the same things I do. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. 338 00:23:27,080 --> 00:23:29,580 Listen, this date's not over yet. We've still got time. 339 00:23:30,460 --> 00:23:31,640 You want to go see a movie? 340 00:23:32,260 --> 00:23:35,700 Well, I've been wanting to see The Diary of Love. 341 00:23:36,880 --> 00:23:37,880 Yeah! 342 00:23:38,610 --> 00:23:40,110 Hopefully they're not sold out, right? 343 00:23:40,790 --> 00:23:42,790 Maybe we can still salvage this date. 344 00:23:43,010 --> 00:23:44,010 He's such a sweetheart. 345 00:23:45,410 --> 00:23:48,290 Damn it, where's Adam? He'll make it, he'll make it! 346 00:23:48,790 --> 00:23:49,790 Hey, there's Adam! 347 00:23:52,910 --> 00:23:54,090 What's going on, man? 348 00:23:54,370 --> 00:23:55,370 Oh, hey fellas! 349 00:23:55,730 --> 00:23:56,730 How's it going? 350 00:23:56,930 --> 00:23:57,990 How's the noggin? 351 00:23:58,250 --> 00:24:00,970 It hurts a little. 352 00:24:01,270 --> 00:24:03,390 Man, guys, this movie's gonna be fa - 353 00:24:06,160 --> 00:24:08,320 Hey, what would you guys do during a real -life zombie attack? 354 00:24:08,620 --> 00:24:11,500 I'd probably use a bone thaw. I'd cut him up with a lawnmower. 355 00:24:11,860 --> 00:24:15,020 You know, I'd probably just hide out in the basement, you know? Help repopulate 356 00:24:15,020 --> 00:24:16,020 the earth. 357 00:24:16,240 --> 00:24:19,380 What about you, Adam? What would you do? Hide or fight? 358 00:24:19,820 --> 00:24:20,820 Real -life zombies? 359 00:24:21,220 --> 00:24:24,060 Well, I'd probably go out and... That's so stupid. There's no such thing as 360 00:24:24,060 --> 00:24:28,060 zombies. What are these idiots doing here? This is supposed to be our night. 361 00:24:28,620 --> 00:24:29,860 Sheer coincidence, baby. 362 00:24:30,240 --> 00:24:34,200 You are happier to see them than you ever are to see me. That's not true. 363 00:24:34,200 --> 00:24:35,220 know I'm here with you. 364 00:24:35,640 --> 00:24:37,720 Well, just don't start talking to them and ignoring me. 365 00:24:37,940 --> 00:24:39,040 Talk to me instead. 366 00:24:39,420 --> 00:24:42,120 Hey, guys, look. The diarrhea of love. 367 00:24:45,860 --> 00:24:49,600 Man, I feel sorry for any sucker who's forced to sit through that chick flick 368 00:24:49,600 --> 00:24:51,160 shit. Hey, they opened up the doors. 369 00:24:52,320 --> 00:24:56,100 Do you really want to see such a stupid movie, Adam? Well, uh, yeah. 370 00:24:56,440 --> 00:24:59,240 Oh, my God. I do not want to see that trash with you. 371 00:24:59,480 --> 00:25:01,500 So being on a date with me isn't what you want? 372 00:25:02,860 --> 00:25:04,920 Two tickets, please. 373 00:25:07,310 --> 00:25:09,410 Dr. Chaotica's house of toxic zombies. 374 00:25:12,010 --> 00:25:14,250 These are my toxic zombies. 375 00:25:14,770 --> 00:25:15,770 Attack! 376 00:25:16,430 --> 00:25:17,430 Attack! 377 00:25:17,950 --> 00:25:19,790 This movie is amazing. 378 00:25:25,670 --> 00:25:27,530 I command you to stop. 379 00:25:27,730 --> 00:25:29,250 I command you to stop. 380 00:25:49,010 --> 00:25:51,410 Are you okay? Are you okay? I know CPR. 381 00:25:51,650 --> 00:25:52,650 I can help. 382 00:25:52,870 --> 00:25:53,970 You know what? 383 00:25:55,270 --> 00:25:56,430 I see a hand. I see a hand. 384 00:27:13,740 --> 00:27:14,900 But what about the zombies? 385 00:27:15,660 --> 00:27:18,460 Listen, there's some things that are more important in life, alright? 386 00:27:20,260 --> 00:27:21,260 That's it. 387 00:27:21,540 --> 00:27:22,540 He's whipped. 388 00:27:22,600 --> 00:27:26,420 Next thing you know, they'll be getting married and squirting out babies. 389 00:27:27,160 --> 00:27:28,420 This will be the end of our team. 390 00:27:29,420 --> 00:27:32,000 Don't worry, I'm sure he'll come around before it's too late. 391 00:27:32,580 --> 00:27:34,300 Now let's go catch the rest of the movie. 392 00:27:34,940 --> 00:27:37,780 Let's see what happens to those Boy Scouts who think that they're going on a 393 00:27:37,780 --> 00:27:39,000 camping trip. 394 00:27:48,020 --> 00:27:50,100 Listen, you knew what I liked when you met me. 395 00:27:50,820 --> 00:27:54,080 I thought you would appreciate me more once you saw how much my friends respect 396 00:27:54,080 --> 00:27:57,180 me. I like them, and they like me too. 397 00:27:57,440 --> 00:28:00,780 So that's why you'd rather see some stupid movie they want to see to make 398 00:28:00,780 --> 00:28:01,780 girlfriend happy? 399 00:28:02,060 --> 00:28:03,300 I want to make you happy, Emily. 400 00:28:04,100 --> 00:28:05,120 I love you. 401 00:28:06,120 --> 00:28:07,120 Prove it. 402 00:28:41,100 --> 00:28:42,560 How was that, baby? 403 00:28:43,960 --> 00:28:44,960 I don't know. 404 00:28:45,300 --> 00:28:47,000 I just don't feel it. 405 00:28:47,320 --> 00:28:50,160 What? I need someone who's my knight in shining armor. 406 00:28:51,220 --> 00:28:54,520 You know, a man who knows how to treat a woman. 407 00:28:56,110 --> 00:28:59,690 I deserve someone who has a nice car and can afford glassy tables. 408 00:29:01,470 --> 00:29:04,570 Someone who can fuck me without quoting lines from The Evil Dead. 409 00:29:04,770 --> 00:29:05,950 I did that one time. Stop! 410 00:29:06,450 --> 00:29:08,270 All you ever want to do is fight with me. 411 00:29:08,510 --> 00:29:09,970 You've always got to win. 412 00:29:10,210 --> 00:29:11,950 I can't take it anymore, Adam. 413 00:29:12,270 --> 00:29:14,390 I'm leaving. Baby, we can work this out. 414 00:29:14,610 --> 00:29:15,610 I'm sick of working. 415 00:29:15,690 --> 00:29:18,010 Love should be easy. Baby, you were easy. 416 00:29:18,330 --> 00:29:20,770 You asshole! Wait, that's not what I meant. Wait, wait, baby. 417 00:29:20,990 --> 00:29:22,090 Let's have some makeup set. 418 00:29:22,290 --> 00:29:23,870 I'm going to my mother's house. 419 00:29:24,230 --> 00:29:25,570 If you really love me. 420 00:29:25,770 --> 00:29:26,770 You'll bring me my duck. 421 00:29:27,630 --> 00:29:28,930 Maybe I'll reconsider. 422 00:29:47,150 --> 00:29:48,890 Allie, it's time to call it a night. 423 00:29:49,130 --> 00:29:51,170 Hey, Uncle Jeb, do you think I could talk to you for a sec? 424 00:29:51,570 --> 00:29:52,570 Did you clock out yet? 425 00:29:52,730 --> 00:29:53,770 Yes. Shoot. 426 00:29:54,220 --> 00:29:58,300 Well, I was going over this season's record, and you'll never guess which 427 00:29:58,300 --> 00:30:00,180 has scored higher than any other team in the league. 428 00:30:01,400 --> 00:30:03,640 Dario and the Slashers, of course. 429 00:30:04,080 --> 00:30:05,320 Actually, Adam's team. 430 00:30:05,620 --> 00:30:06,620 The zombie killers? 431 00:30:06,920 --> 00:30:07,920 That's not true. 432 00:30:08,280 --> 00:30:09,840 Dario's team beat them last night. 433 00:30:10,100 --> 00:30:13,980 No, Dario's team only considers themselves to be number one because 434 00:30:13,980 --> 00:30:16,860 undefeated. But Adam's team has the highest scoring average. 435 00:30:17,520 --> 00:30:21,560 So that means, at this point, either team qualifies for the national bowling 436 00:30:21,560 --> 00:30:22,479 tournament in Hawaii. 437 00:30:22,480 --> 00:30:24,800 I don't want to hear it. Adam's team's 86. 438 00:30:25,040 --> 00:30:28,560 Come on, Uncle Jeb. Just give them one more chance. Just one match between the 439 00:30:28,560 --> 00:30:31,160 slashers and the zombie killers to prove which team is the best. 440 00:30:31,600 --> 00:30:32,780 Absolutely not. 441 00:30:33,260 --> 00:30:35,460 I'm not playing host to another riot. 442 00:30:35,720 --> 00:30:39,120 I remember when people in this alley showed passion for this sport. 443 00:30:39,360 --> 00:30:41,580 I was just trying to rekindle the old flame. 444 00:30:42,240 --> 00:30:45,100 Don't talk to me about passion. No, it's fine. 445 00:30:45,390 --> 00:30:48,970 When Dario and the Flashers head to Hawaii, I'm sure they'll put a good word 446 00:30:48,970 --> 00:30:51,830 for the auto emporium, and no one will hear about the alley where it all got 447 00:30:51,830 --> 00:30:56,290 started. Once again, you'll be overshadowed by Ernie Weiss and his 448 00:30:58,530 --> 00:30:59,530 All right. 449 00:31:01,670 --> 00:31:04,410 I'll do it. One match. That's it. 450 00:31:04,630 --> 00:31:05,630 Really? Yes. 451 00:31:05,730 --> 00:31:06,970 Thanks, Uncle Jeb. 452 00:31:07,590 --> 00:31:08,590 You're the best. 453 00:31:08,670 --> 00:31:09,670 I know. 454 00:31:10,470 --> 00:31:12,670 Hey, be safe walking home, okay? 455 00:31:14,090 --> 00:31:14,959 Take care. 456 00:31:14,960 --> 00:31:15,960 creepy cemetery. 457 00:31:16,480 --> 00:31:19,760 Okay. What is it with kids in cemeteries? 458 00:31:20,320 --> 00:31:21,320 Fucking kids. 459 00:31:33,500 --> 00:31:35,360 Hey there. Emily, is it? 460 00:31:35,820 --> 00:31:38,560 Yes. You look like you've had a hard night. 461 00:31:38,820 --> 00:31:39,960 You need a ride? 462 00:31:40,340 --> 00:31:41,340 Oh. 463 00:31:42,000 --> 00:31:43,360 I'd love a ride. 464 00:31:50,380 --> 00:31:52,000 Yeah, are you enjoying the ride, baby? 465 00:31:52,260 --> 00:31:53,260 Oh, yes! 466 00:31:53,440 --> 00:31:54,440 Yes! 467 00:31:57,180 --> 00:31:58,180 Wow! 468 00:31:59,100 --> 00:32:00,220 No, no, no, no! 469 00:32:01,400 --> 00:32:02,400 Don't do that. 470 00:32:03,440 --> 00:32:04,620 Nobody does that. 471 00:32:04,840 --> 00:32:07,580 How do you know you're not gonna like it if you haven't even tried it? I'm not 472 00:32:07,580 --> 00:32:09,260 saying that I haven't tried it. 473 00:32:10,040 --> 00:32:11,860 Or that I don't like it. 474 00:32:12,160 --> 00:32:14,060 I'm just saying you gotta earn it. 475 00:32:16,440 --> 00:32:17,740 Anything for you, baby. 476 00:32:20,520 --> 00:32:27,380 What I want you to do is go to Adam's and get 477 00:32:27,380 --> 00:32:28,380 my stuff. 478 00:32:28,620 --> 00:32:29,620 All right. 479 00:32:29,880 --> 00:32:32,500 What if he doesn't want to give me your stuff? 480 00:32:32,920 --> 00:32:33,920 Kick his ass. 481 00:32:34,100 --> 00:32:35,100 Sure thing. 482 00:32:35,380 --> 00:32:38,020 First thing in the morning. Now back to business. 483 00:32:41,360 --> 00:32:42,360 Okay, 484 00:32:44,140 --> 00:32:46,820 kid, watch this vampire apple crumbie now. Watch this. 485 00:32:47,020 --> 00:32:48,720 Watch this. Watch closely. Here I go. 486 00:32:55,240 --> 00:32:55,680 That 487 00:32:55,680 --> 00:33:02,680 was 488 00:33:02,680 --> 00:33:10,340 great. 489 00:33:10,620 --> 00:33:12,980 You see that, kid? That's what competition is. 490 00:33:13,500 --> 00:33:16,140 Perfection. They all went down a strike after strike. 491 00:33:16,970 --> 00:33:18,330 I was the greatest. You understand? 492 00:33:19,050 --> 00:33:21,110 Perfection. You've got to rise above the others. 493 00:33:23,850 --> 00:33:28,510 You can't be some kind of automaton zombie idiot in this day and age. You 494 00:33:28,510 --> 00:33:32,090 like a brain -dead zombie from one of the stupid movies you like so much. Say, 495 00:33:32,090 --> 00:33:34,210 what would you guys do during a real -life zombie attack? 496 00:33:34,570 --> 00:33:35,730 Hide or fight? 497 00:33:36,390 --> 00:33:38,210 All you ever want to do is fight with me. 498 00:33:40,630 --> 00:33:44,190 You've got to compete. You've got to kill. You've got to shit competition. 499 00:34:29,460 --> 00:34:31,100 It's all about competition. 500 00:34:31,580 --> 00:34:35,560 That's what life is, you little faggot. Remember, Adam, I was a winner. 501 00:34:35,840 --> 00:34:38,239 Hey, hey, I was a winner. I won. 502 00:34:38,460 --> 00:34:39,259 I won. 503 00:34:39,260 --> 00:34:40,800 Yeah, yeah, I won. 504 00:34:44,280 --> 00:34:48,719 Surely you must be crazy to be watching such a crapola movie like this. 505 00:34:49,139 --> 00:34:50,239 Crazy, I tell you. 506 00:34:50,580 --> 00:34:52,960 You must be crazy, too, for entertainment. 507 00:34:53,280 --> 00:34:54,380 But come back. 508 00:34:55,020 --> 00:34:59,280 I've got killer deals I've lost my mind. 509 00:34:59,690 --> 00:35:03,310 I've lost my mind. I'm slashing prices. You want to get down here and see what I 510 00:35:03,310 --> 00:35:04,770 got? I dare you. 511 00:35:05,150 --> 00:35:07,430 We'll lose our minds together. 512 00:35:33,870 --> 00:35:36,990 Perhaps they like to hear the good word of Jehovah God. Perhaps they would. 513 00:35:37,350 --> 00:35:38,750 Let us try. Let us. 514 00:36:41,020 --> 00:36:43,080 James? James? 515 00:36:45,200 --> 00:36:46,200 Raines. 516 00:36:47,100 --> 00:36:48,700 Raines. James? 517 00:36:49,980 --> 00:36:52,740 I'm not a piece of trash, you cocksucker. 518 00:38:12,620 --> 00:38:15,120 You're never gonna get me, you un -dead son of a bitch! 519 00:38:15,380 --> 00:38:16,380 ยฟQuรฉ pasรณ? 520 00:38:35,280 --> 00:38:36,360 My suspicions are true. 521 00:38:36,640 --> 00:38:38,460 The zombies have taken over the world. 522 00:38:39,280 --> 00:38:45,540 And it is up to me, as a citizen of planet Earth, to kill the walking dead! 523 00:38:46,960 --> 00:38:48,300 We all have our challenges. 524 00:38:49,000 --> 00:38:50,500 The key is to overcome them. 525 00:38:51,160 --> 00:38:52,200 Hence the next pose. 526 00:38:52,520 --> 00:38:53,560 Step with the left foot. 527 00:38:54,280 --> 00:38:55,280 Point the toe. 528 00:38:55,700 --> 00:38:58,460 Hand on knee. Reach towards the sky. 529 00:39:49,840 --> 00:39:51,420 There. Gotta refuel. 530 00:39:53,980 --> 00:39:55,820 Hey Adam, you home? 531 00:39:59,560 --> 00:40:01,080 Hey cock -ass, you in here? 532 00:40:03,340 --> 00:40:05,820 Must be jerking it with the thumb up his ass right now. 533 00:40:20,710 --> 00:40:23,650 I'm in the bowling alley. The reason I'm calling is because I talked to my Uncle 534 00:40:23,650 --> 00:40:27,190 Jeb and he said he's going to allow the zombie killers to bowl one final match 535 00:40:27,190 --> 00:40:28,190 against the slashers. 536 00:40:28,610 --> 00:40:32,710 Anyways, I hope you guys win because Dario is such a fag and I'm sick of him. 537 00:40:32,930 --> 00:40:36,890 So anyways, the match is tonight at 7 and I'll see you there. Okay, bye. 538 00:40:37,790 --> 00:40:38,990 No you won't. 539 00:41:02,890 --> 00:41:03,890 Oh my God. 540 00:41:32,040 --> 00:41:34,480 Thank God you're all right. Oh, Adam, have you heard the news? 541 00:41:34,720 --> 00:41:35,720 Oh, yeah, man. 542 00:41:35,760 --> 00:41:36,760 It's unbelievable. 543 00:41:36,820 --> 00:41:38,500 Tell me about it, bro. But we can win. 544 00:41:38,740 --> 00:41:39,740 You think so? 545 00:41:39,940 --> 00:41:41,000 There aren't too many of them? 546 00:41:41,260 --> 00:41:43,440 Nah, there's nothing to be afraid of. We can take them. 547 00:41:43,700 --> 00:41:47,680 Really? Hey, the time has finally come. Just maintain your focus and don't get 548 00:41:47,680 --> 00:41:48,680 distracted by doubt. 549 00:41:49,140 --> 00:41:50,480 Be prepared to make a killing. 550 00:41:50,900 --> 00:41:52,140 And to do it with style. 551 00:41:53,120 --> 00:41:53,859 Thanks, Ben. 552 00:41:53,860 --> 00:41:57,220 Yeah. Hey, and don't forget, have fun with it, okay? We'll see you at the 553 00:41:57,220 --> 00:41:58,220 bowling match tonight. 554 00:41:59,160 --> 00:42:00,300 Gonna get my... 555 00:42:12,970 --> 00:42:14,350 He went down on me in the cemetery. 556 00:42:15,070 --> 00:42:17,270 It was so naughty. 557 00:42:17,790 --> 00:42:18,790 You're a slut. 558 00:42:19,710 --> 00:42:21,730 I didn't know Adam was into that kinky shit. 559 00:42:22,390 --> 00:42:23,830 Adam? No, no. 560 00:42:24,310 --> 00:42:25,750 Me and Adam are through. 561 00:42:26,370 --> 00:42:28,730 I meant Dario. 562 00:42:28,990 --> 00:42:32,930 Dario? Dario doesn't date girls. He just fucks them and passes them aside. 563 00:42:33,230 --> 00:42:36,810 Yeah, he never even called me after I gave him a blumpkin. 564 00:42:37,130 --> 00:42:38,350 But he's different. 565 00:42:38,670 --> 00:42:43,130 And what makes you so special? So, how does Adam feel about you dating Dario? 566 00:42:43,450 --> 00:42:44,630 Who gives a fuck? 567 00:42:44,890 --> 00:42:48,290 Adam's so out of touch with reality, it'll be a while before he even figures 568 00:42:48,290 --> 00:42:52,850 out. So it's probably Adam calling right now to beg me to come back for him. 569 00:42:53,010 --> 00:42:54,010 Answer it! 570 00:42:57,850 --> 00:42:59,250 Everybody's turned into zombies! 571 00:42:59,530 --> 00:43:02,690 You better find a place to hide before they get to you. I don't know what 572 00:43:02,690 --> 00:43:06,530 trying to pull, you fucking weirdo, but I am not coming back for you. 573 00:43:06,930 --> 00:43:07,930 We're finished. 574 00:43:10,830 --> 00:43:11,669 other lines. 575 00:43:11,670 --> 00:43:12,810 Goodbye forever. 576 00:43:13,550 --> 00:43:14,550 Emily! 577 00:43:15,270 --> 00:43:16,270 God, 578 00:43:16,990 --> 00:43:17,990 what a freak. 579 00:43:18,250 --> 00:43:21,450 I'm so glad I don't have to deal with any more ridiculous zombie bullshit. 580 00:43:22,150 --> 00:43:23,150 Emily, listen. 581 00:43:23,610 --> 00:43:25,630 Adam turned into a psychotic murderer. 582 00:43:25,870 --> 00:43:28,590 You better hide before he finds you and kills you dead. 583 00:43:28,890 --> 00:43:31,370 Very funny, Dario. I knew you'd call. 584 00:43:31,610 --> 00:43:34,230 Emily, I am coming to pick you up. You are not safe. 585 00:43:34,490 --> 00:43:35,590 I'm fine, Dario. 586 00:43:36,050 --> 00:43:38,190 So, did you get my tip from Adam? 587 00:43:38,590 --> 00:43:39,590 Uh, yeah. 588 00:43:41,450 --> 00:43:46,470 That's really... I'm so glad I'll never have any reason to ever see Adam again. 589 00:43:46,870 --> 00:43:48,790 Let him go, psycho, for all I care. 590 00:43:49,030 --> 00:43:52,030 Yeah, but you know what? If that asshole thinks he can go around slashing people 591 00:43:52,030 --> 00:43:54,050 in my town, he's got another thing coming. 592 00:43:54,290 --> 00:43:55,910 I'm gonna bring him to justice. 593 00:43:56,390 --> 00:43:57,930 Shouldn't we leave that up to the police? 594 00:43:58,230 --> 00:43:59,230 The police? 595 00:44:02,290 --> 00:44:04,930 We got an anonymous tip that some illegal immigrants were doing some yard 596 00:44:04,930 --> 00:44:07,790 around here and we stumbled across this double homicide. Must be our lucky day. 597 00:44:08,990 --> 00:44:09,990 Not for these two. 598 00:44:10,570 --> 00:44:12,810 They picked the wrong doorbell to ding -dong. 599 00:44:13,390 --> 00:44:15,070 They're knocking on heaven's door now. 600 00:44:16,770 --> 00:44:17,770 Oh, my God. 601 00:44:18,270 --> 00:44:19,270 That's gruesome. 602 00:44:19,630 --> 00:44:23,070 Gruesome? Have you seen my mother -in -law? Now that is gruesome. 603 00:44:23,970 --> 00:44:26,630 Hey, Chief. Found the other immigrant worker over here. 604 00:44:27,270 --> 00:44:29,010 Good. We can interrogate him. 605 00:44:29,350 --> 00:44:33,510 Does anybody here speak... Mexican? 606 00:44:59,600 --> 00:45:01,640 Not us, huh? We look like you've seen a ghost. 607 00:46:20,919 --> 00:46:22,520 Watch out for tan lines. 608 00:46:24,000 --> 00:46:25,700 Oh, there's my ride. 609 00:46:26,140 --> 00:46:27,140 Bye, girls. 610 00:46:27,180 --> 00:46:28,540 Well, you two have fun. 611 00:46:28,900 --> 00:46:30,480 I think we have to go shopping. 612 00:46:30,880 --> 00:46:34,040 Yeah, I heard there's some really big sales going on, and I need some new cha 613 00:46:34,040 --> 00:46:35,040 -cha heels. 614 00:47:26,160 --> 00:47:26,859 You're telling me. 615 00:47:26,860 --> 00:47:29,100 I haven't seen a scene like this in Schindler's List. 616 00:47:30,240 --> 00:47:32,740 Looks like our boy's leaving us a little trail of death. 617 00:47:33,340 --> 00:47:34,760 That's not all he left us. Look. 618 00:47:35,400 --> 00:47:36,400 Another clue. 619 00:47:38,580 --> 00:47:41,620 Say, isn't this that Adam guy's girlfriend? 620 00:47:42,360 --> 00:47:44,420 You know, I think I've seen her once or twice at the bowling alley. 621 00:47:45,340 --> 00:47:46,340 Adam the bowler? 622 00:47:48,980 --> 00:47:50,440 Yeah, that is his girlfriend. 623 00:47:52,080 --> 00:47:54,900 Does that mean she's... Next on our killer's list? 624 00:47:55,390 --> 00:47:56,390 Very likely. 625 00:47:56,890 --> 00:48:00,490 Our prerogative now, boys, is to catch killer before atrocious acts of violence 626 00:48:00,490 --> 00:48:06,690 are committed upon this very innocent... Sweet girl. 627 00:48:07,470 --> 00:48:10,730 So have you socked that cocksucker in the fucking throat and you want to get 628 00:48:10,730 --> 00:48:11,730 stuff back from him? 629 00:48:12,110 --> 00:48:15,710 Actually, he wasn't around, but I... Hey, where's my picture? 630 00:48:16,210 --> 00:48:17,210 What? 631 00:48:17,420 --> 00:48:21,720 I had a framed picture of myself in here. I deliberately took it so Adam 632 00:48:21,720 --> 00:48:23,280 wouldn't have anything to jack off to. 633 00:48:23,700 --> 00:48:26,020 Oh, I'm sorry. I thought it was in there. I must have fallen out. 634 00:48:26,780 --> 00:48:30,920 Oh, my God. I give you one thing to do. 635 00:48:31,580 --> 00:48:32,840 I said I'm sorry. 636 00:48:33,240 --> 00:48:34,660 But you don't have to yell at me. 637 00:48:34,960 --> 00:48:36,520 I'm not yelling. Yes, you are. 638 00:48:36,940 --> 00:48:37,879 No, I'm not. 639 00:48:37,880 --> 00:48:39,860 You boys are all the same. 640 00:48:40,660 --> 00:48:42,100 Temper, temper, temper. 641 00:48:43,640 --> 00:48:44,820 Now I'm a scary... 642 00:48:52,110 --> 00:48:53,110 Ernie has my purse! 643 00:48:53,550 --> 00:48:55,490 We've got matching purses! 644 00:48:55,850 --> 00:48:58,270 He must have taken one! Now I've got hers? 645 00:48:59,170 --> 00:49:01,830 Shit! My checkbook was in there! 646 00:49:02,290 --> 00:49:05,510 Oh, that's okay. As long as I'm around, you don't need your checkbook, babe. 647 00:49:06,770 --> 00:49:07,770 Sure. 648 00:49:08,730 --> 00:49:11,090 Let me stop by Uncle Ernie's to get paid. 649 00:49:15,650 --> 00:49:17,590 I'm so excited. 650 00:49:18,310 --> 00:49:19,610 Can you believe? 651 00:49:20,490 --> 00:49:21,490 I don't need it. 652 00:49:22,480 --> 00:49:26,840 Cysa, cuss for some reason. That's bullshit. My heels are killing me. I 653 00:49:26,840 --> 00:49:27,799 get in. 654 00:49:27,800 --> 00:49:29,380 Hey, I think I saw somebody. 655 00:49:29,680 --> 00:49:30,680 Maybe they'll let us in. 656 00:49:31,120 --> 00:49:33,540 Hello? Hello? Can you let us in? 657 00:49:33,820 --> 00:49:36,040 Please, I need to shop. 658 00:49:37,340 --> 00:49:40,640 When there's no more room in hell, you can't walk the street. 659 00:50:21,550 --> 00:50:23,490 You know that shopping will cost you an arm and a leg? 660 00:50:28,790 --> 00:50:30,250 Not so fast, Dario. 661 00:50:30,590 --> 00:50:32,350 I just want to get in and get out. Make this quick. 662 00:50:32,550 --> 00:50:33,630 Uncle Ernie owes me money. 663 00:50:33,990 --> 00:50:35,270 But why are we ducking? 664 00:50:35,490 --> 00:50:39,030 I just want to avoid those used car salesmen. They're so douchey. 665 00:50:44,090 --> 00:50:47,270 Oh, now he decides to show up. What? 666 00:50:47,610 --> 00:50:48,890 Oh, uh, hey guys. 667 00:50:49,350 --> 00:50:50,970 Hey, we came as soon as we heard the news. 668 00:50:51,970 --> 00:50:55,730 News? You know, Jeb's making us have a rematch so we can qualify for the 669 00:50:55,730 --> 00:50:57,110 national bowling tournament in Hawaii. 670 00:50:57,430 --> 00:51:01,470 Oh, that dude. If you knew, why haven't you been more concerned, Dario? 671 00:51:02,110 --> 00:51:05,230 Perhaps you've been spending too much time banging this hoochie mama you 672 00:51:05,230 --> 00:51:06,049 in here. 673 00:51:06,050 --> 00:51:09,670 Oh, uh, hey guys, this is Emily. Pleased to meet you. Howdy -do. 674 00:51:10,010 --> 00:51:14,010 I don't give a fuck who this bitch is. You boys need to concentrate. 675 00:51:14,230 --> 00:51:17,350 You gotta win tonight so you can go to the national bowling tournament in 676 00:51:17,350 --> 00:51:18,350 Hawaii. 677 00:51:18,540 --> 00:51:20,960 I don't think Adam's going to make it to the tournament tonight. 678 00:51:21,180 --> 00:51:22,460 Yeah, I'm his ex -girlfriend. 679 00:51:22,820 --> 00:51:27,360 Hey, sugar tits, why don't you fuck off while the big boys here talk? 680 00:51:27,700 --> 00:51:30,660 You fuck off. Get this skanky cunt out of here. 681 00:51:30,900 --> 00:51:33,920 But boss, I was hoping you could write me a check for bowling expenses. Get out 682 00:51:33,920 --> 00:51:37,460 of here, all you shit cakes. I ain't paying nobody nothing until you take 683 00:51:37,460 --> 00:51:40,440 of Adam and the zombie killers however you have to. 684 00:51:41,420 --> 00:51:42,640 Lord, that hurts. 685 00:51:43,320 --> 00:51:45,000 I didn't like bowling so much. 686 00:51:46,080 --> 00:51:47,700 Your sponsor is a real dick. 687 00:51:48,080 --> 00:51:50,060 He needs to calm the fuck down before he has a heart attack. 688 00:51:50,340 --> 00:51:51,600 Let him have a heart attack. 689 00:51:51,820 --> 00:51:53,920 He could die in the next ten minutes for all I care. 690 00:51:54,580 --> 00:51:56,960 That's all well and good, but what about tonight's match? 691 00:51:57,240 --> 00:51:58,240 What about Adam? 692 00:51:58,520 --> 00:52:01,940 He had just let me finish. I could have told him. Adam's gone shit crazy. 693 00:52:02,340 --> 00:52:05,740 If we can find him before tonight, we can get that sicko locked up in the 694 00:52:05,740 --> 00:52:06,740 bin and be heroes. 695 00:52:06,860 --> 00:52:10,420 Not only that, but we can secure our spot in the national bowling tournament 696 00:52:10,420 --> 00:52:13,480 Hawaii. Well, let's go find the fucking freak. Smash him down. 697 00:52:13,740 --> 00:52:16,680 If you guys find him, call me. We'll reconvene at the bowling alley. 698 00:52:16,880 --> 00:52:18,320 Figure out what to do with him from there. 699 00:52:19,080 --> 00:52:20,420 Well, but, but, wait. 700 00:52:21,440 --> 00:52:24,540 We need to spread out and cover more ground. I know Adam. 701 00:52:24,840 --> 00:52:28,020 He's one sneaky little turd, always one streak ahead. 702 00:52:33,020 --> 00:52:34,880 Dario is so awesome. 703 00:52:35,180 --> 00:52:37,360 I really wish I could be a slasher. 704 00:52:39,580 --> 00:52:41,260 Guys, look! A customer! 705 00:52:43,560 --> 00:52:45,240 No, no, no, no, no, no, no! 706 00:53:47,220 --> 00:53:49,040 Oh, thank God you've got a gun. 707 00:53:49,380 --> 00:53:50,960 That must mean you're not one of them. 708 00:53:51,340 --> 00:53:52,780 I know why you're here. 709 00:53:53,180 --> 00:53:55,720 You got a lot of nerves showing your ugly mug around here. 710 00:53:56,080 --> 00:53:57,860 But I'm not interested in negotiating. 711 00:53:58,160 --> 00:54:00,360 You're going to lose and you'll be forgotten. 712 00:54:00,760 --> 00:54:05,000 I survived this far. I don't care how good you are. There's no place for you 713 00:54:05,000 --> 00:54:08,480 my team. So you can stop trying to convince me right now. 714 00:54:08,840 --> 00:54:12,560 Fine. I just thought if we teamed up, we might stand a chance. 715 00:54:12,980 --> 00:54:14,980 I can never trust anyone with your blood. 716 00:54:15,880 --> 00:54:16,900 None of this is actually mine. 717 00:54:17,660 --> 00:54:19,880 Your grandfather couldn't be trusted. 718 00:54:20,240 --> 00:54:24,280 We went all the way to nationals, and we were offered 50 grand by the other 719 00:54:24,280 --> 00:54:27,500 team's sponsors if we threw the match and lost. 720 00:54:27,860 --> 00:54:31,320 We all agreed, and we all played mediocre on purpose. 721 00:54:31,860 --> 00:54:36,180 All of us except your gramps, who bowled strike after strike after strike. Oh, 722 00:54:36,200 --> 00:54:37,200 yeah. Oh, yeah. Wah! 723 00:54:39,220 --> 00:54:41,200 It finally came down to two to three. 724 00:54:41,440 --> 00:54:44,760 He could have gutted it and gotten us the moolah, but instead... 725 00:54:44,970 --> 00:54:46,170 He opted for the trophy. 726 00:54:52,630 --> 00:54:57,410 We won the game, but now the sponsors were after it. We all blamed your 727 00:54:57,410 --> 00:54:59,230 grandfather. I was the winner! 728 00:54:59,470 --> 00:55:01,170 I was the winner! 729 00:55:02,230 --> 00:55:03,310 I ain't gonna do it. 730 00:55:06,110 --> 00:55:07,310 I'm not gonna do it either. 731 00:55:07,510 --> 00:55:11,210 And since I was the team captain, they gave me a loaded gun to prove my 732 00:55:11,210 --> 00:55:12,210 allegiance. 733 00:55:21,100 --> 00:55:26,520 I did more than prove myself that day. And I worked my way up through the ranks 734 00:55:26,520 --> 00:55:27,920 until I owned this place. 735 00:55:28,200 --> 00:55:30,460 And now I got my own team to sponsor. 736 00:55:30,760 --> 00:55:33,020 All because I killed your grandpa. 737 00:55:33,820 --> 00:55:38,060 You killed Gramps? Best choice I ever did make. 738 00:55:50,670 --> 00:55:52,250 that I don't have any morals, mister. 739 00:55:52,710 --> 00:55:57,470 I only kill zombies, not random human beings, even if they deserve it. 740 00:55:58,390 --> 00:56:04,090 That's what separates me from monsters like you. You're not getting away that 741 00:56:04,090 --> 00:56:05,090 easy. 742 00:56:41,580 --> 00:56:43,480 So, hotties, we've got 16 homicides today. 743 00:56:44,020 --> 00:56:49,220 16? Yep, we've got two Jehovah's Witnesses, one immigrant gardener, five 744 00:56:49,220 --> 00:56:53,040 of a yoga class, one gas station attendant, four construction workers, a 745 00:56:53,040 --> 00:56:55,220 sunbather, and a partridge in a pear tree. 746 00:56:55,560 --> 00:56:56,840 What are you idiots doing? 747 00:56:57,120 --> 00:56:58,120 Any more evidence? 748 00:56:58,340 --> 00:56:59,340 Yeah, this. 749 00:57:00,420 --> 00:57:02,540 Looks like it belongs to an Emily Horbach. 750 00:57:03,140 --> 00:57:04,180 By Jove! 751 00:57:05,140 --> 00:57:07,600 This ID matches the one we found in the park scene. 752 00:57:08,080 --> 00:57:09,180 This is the girlfriend. 753 00:57:09,640 --> 00:57:11,600 So! Our mass murderer is a girl? 754 00:57:11,940 --> 00:57:12,940 No, you fool. 755 00:57:13,180 --> 00:57:16,520 A beautiful girl like this would never be as innocent as whoever's committed 756 00:57:16,520 --> 00:57:17,379 these murders. 757 00:57:17,380 --> 00:57:18,820 What makes you so sure of that? 758 00:57:19,120 --> 00:57:22,660 I'm betting our killer's a slacker, 20 -something male who's never quite grown 759 00:57:22,660 --> 00:57:25,440 up and now would have it as a fantasy world of his own creation that has been 760 00:57:25,440 --> 00:57:28,660 influenced by continuous exposure to violent pop culture. 761 00:57:29,220 --> 00:57:32,540 He's probably frustrated with his dead -end lifestyle and now subconsciously 762 00:57:32,540 --> 00:57:34,800 lashing out at the most privative of violent matter he can. 763 00:57:59,370 --> 00:58:02,730 Thought people lost weight when they died. I bet that prick Jerry's in heaven 764 00:58:02,730 --> 00:58:03,790 laughing at us right now. 765 00:58:04,050 --> 00:58:06,110 You know they never let a prick like that in heaven. 766 00:58:43,150 --> 00:58:44,150 brain dead. 767 00:58:49,430 --> 00:58:50,430 Oh, Chris. 768 00:58:53,670 --> 00:58:54,670 I failed you. 769 00:58:55,650 --> 00:58:57,610 I guess I'm just not as stubborn as you were. 770 00:58:58,750 --> 00:59:04,370 You would have never let this happen, but now it's in my veins. 771 00:59:07,290 --> 00:59:09,530 It's only a matter of time before I become one of them. 772 00:59:09,950 --> 00:59:10,950 My list. 773 00:59:11,030 --> 00:59:12,030 Flesh -eating zombie. 774 00:59:14,249 --> 00:59:18,910 Chris I'm sorry Chris I'm sorry 775 00:59:18,910 --> 00:59:25,630 I'm a loser who wastes my life watching zombie movies and bowling 776 00:59:47,280 --> 00:59:51,040 Like the scent of old shoes, cigarette smoke, and floor wax. Am I right, guys? 777 00:59:51,280 --> 00:59:55,000 Sweet home, man. Now, let's be on our best behavior, guys. We don't want Jeb 778 00:59:55,000 --> 00:59:56,000 kick us out again. 779 00:59:56,180 --> 00:59:59,800 Relax. Just maintain your focus. We can win this. I know we can. Hey, guys. 780 01:00:00,040 --> 01:00:01,040 Hey, what's up? 781 01:00:01,140 --> 01:00:02,140 Nothing. Where's Adam? 782 01:00:02,300 --> 01:00:05,480 I was just about to ask you the same thing. We figured he'd be here already, 783 01:00:05,580 --> 01:00:09,420 warming up. Haven't seen him. You mean he's not here? Should we call him? He 784 01:00:09,420 --> 01:00:11,840 didn't forget, did he? I know he can be a real space cadet sometime. 785 01:00:12,720 --> 01:00:13,698 Bowling's his life. 786 01:00:13,700 --> 01:00:14,700 He wouldn't forget. 787 01:00:15,000 --> 01:00:17,980 Well, if he doesn't show, I could always sub for him, you know, like an honorary 788 01:00:17,980 --> 01:00:22,640 member of your team. I wouldn't worry too much about that. Just give him some 789 01:00:22,640 --> 01:00:23,640 time. He'll show. 790 01:00:24,480 --> 01:00:28,660 Well, well, well, if it isn't the sore losers coming back for another ass 791 01:00:28,660 --> 01:00:32,100 -whipping. Hate to break it to you, queers, but the game's already over. 792 01:00:32,500 --> 01:00:34,940 Yeah, and I have a feeling your teammate ain't showing up either. 793 01:00:35,160 --> 01:00:37,220 Adam? What makes you say that? 794 01:00:37,680 --> 01:00:39,540 Well, let's just say he's tied up. 795 01:00:40,000 --> 01:00:41,000 Tied up? 796 01:00:41,020 --> 01:00:42,020 With what? 797 01:00:42,350 --> 01:00:47,250 Well, let's just say rope. Dude, shut the fuck up. Either way, if Adam doesn't 798 01:00:47,250 --> 01:00:49,010 show, you guys have to forfeit anyways. 799 01:00:49,490 --> 01:00:51,950 Not true. If he doesn't show, I could always sub for him. 800 01:00:53,130 --> 01:00:54,009 We'll make it. 801 01:00:54,010 --> 01:00:58,090 In case you guys haven't noticed, your buddy Dario hasn't shown up either. So 802 01:00:58,090 --> 01:01:01,630 looks like it's three on three. Fuck that. I have no fucking reason with you 803 01:01:01,630 --> 01:01:02,630 queers. 804 01:01:02,870 --> 01:01:04,010 We'll see you at the lane. 805 01:01:05,050 --> 01:01:06,430 We'll see you about the threesome. 806 01:01:08,630 --> 01:01:10,490 Uh, where is Dario anyway? 807 01:01:11,470 --> 01:01:14,110 I just talked to him on the phone. He said he should be here any minute. 808 01:01:14,330 --> 01:01:15,830 Why are we always waiting on him? 809 01:01:16,210 --> 01:01:17,710 Dude, he's our leader. 810 01:01:18,170 --> 01:01:19,170 Fuck that shit. 811 01:01:19,470 --> 01:01:21,850 What's the sense in waiting on him to get down here anyway? 812 01:01:22,150 --> 01:01:25,670 Uh, because he's our leader, and on top of that, he'd fucking kick our ass if we 813 01:01:25,670 --> 01:01:26,670 took all the credit anyways. 814 01:01:26,850 --> 01:01:30,330 If he's not here in ten minutes, I have half a mind to call the cops myself and 815 01:01:30,330 --> 01:01:33,750 turn in Adam right now. Dude, will you just fucking calm down, you dickass? 816 01:01:33,750 --> 01:01:35,810 is gonna be fucking great publicity for us. 817 01:01:36,030 --> 01:01:39,630 Then Dario should get his ass down here. What could he possibly be doing that's 818 01:01:39,630 --> 01:01:40,630 more important than this? 819 01:01:46,650 --> 01:01:50,750 I don't want to miss the satisfaction of seeing Adam get his ass kicked. 820 01:01:51,030 --> 01:01:52,030 Don't worry, babe. 821 01:01:52,130 --> 01:01:55,470 I just want to specify you a little longer before we go back. 822 01:01:55,710 --> 01:01:56,830 You're so kinky. 823 01:01:57,170 --> 01:02:00,210 You got a thing for fucking girls at the graveyard? 824 01:02:00,570 --> 01:02:02,870 Hey, that is in my mom's basement. 825 01:02:05,190 --> 01:02:07,550 Chief, do you copy? Where are you? 826 01:02:08,370 --> 01:02:09,370 I'm at the cemetery. 827 01:02:11,340 --> 01:02:13,080 It looks like we have another mess on our hands. 828 01:02:13,300 --> 01:02:15,320 All right, I'll be right there. I just gotta shake. 829 01:02:17,520 --> 01:02:20,840 Don't tell me you don't think about all the dead bodies while we're doing it. 830 01:02:21,380 --> 01:02:23,080 Doesn't it make it that much more naughty? 831 01:02:23,420 --> 01:02:24,419 Oh, I guess. 832 01:02:24,420 --> 01:02:25,760 I just like how it feels. 833 01:02:26,000 --> 01:02:27,000 Oh, me too. 834 01:02:27,320 --> 01:02:30,500 And the idea of getting caught makes it that much more thrilling. 835 01:02:31,160 --> 01:02:32,160 Don't worry, baby. 836 01:02:32,380 --> 01:02:33,800 Nobody's ever gonna catch us. 837 01:02:34,440 --> 01:02:35,520 Oh! Oh! 838 01:02:35,780 --> 01:02:36,780 I'm coming! 839 01:02:36,920 --> 01:02:38,740 I'm coming! Gee, are you coming? 840 01:02:39,480 --> 01:02:40,480 Just came. 841 01:02:41,390 --> 01:02:42,530 I mean, I'll be right there. 842 01:02:45,410 --> 01:02:46,890 Five fresh corpses. 843 01:02:47,430 --> 01:02:49,310 Four, you idiot. This one's already dead. 844 01:02:50,070 --> 01:02:52,930 What kind of sick bastard gets off on killing what's already dead? 845 01:02:53,390 --> 01:02:55,390 Boys, I just got off a dispatch. 846 01:02:55,630 --> 01:02:59,330 We got the killer. They have him tied up in a trunk at the bowling alley. 847 01:03:00,790 --> 01:03:03,130 Hey, sorry I'm late. 848 01:03:03,570 --> 01:03:05,350 I just saw some suspicious activity. 849 01:03:06,110 --> 01:03:09,030 No time for apologies now, sheep of police. 850 01:03:09,640 --> 01:03:15,680 We've got the killer, and he's all tied up at the bowling alley. Hey, hold on a 851 01:03:15,680 --> 01:03:19,720 gosh darn minute. Now, I'm the chief of police, and I'm in charge here. Now, I 852 01:03:19,720 --> 01:03:23,060 just saw some suspicious activity, and my gut tells me we should investigate. 853 01:03:25,700 --> 01:03:27,080 Fuck your gut. 854 01:03:27,900 --> 01:03:31,880 I caught the killer, and he's at the bowling alley. 855 01:03:32,320 --> 01:03:34,420 Come on, fellas, to the bowling alley. 856 01:03:45,680 --> 01:03:46,680 Mario, you made it. 857 01:03:47,600 --> 01:03:48,900 Well, did you find the bastard? 858 01:03:49,400 --> 01:03:50,400 Yeah, he's in the trunk. 859 01:03:50,640 --> 01:03:54,120 Told Jason to wait to call the cops so you got here, but he wouldn't. He's just 860 01:03:54,120 --> 01:03:55,120 not a team player. 861 01:03:55,520 --> 01:03:57,520 Well, he got here just in time, you douchebags. 862 01:03:57,960 --> 01:04:00,040 Let's have a look at him before the cops get here. 863 01:04:02,300 --> 01:04:04,620 Aw, Jesus, guys. I didn't say to kill him. 864 01:04:05,340 --> 01:04:06,340 He's not dead. 865 01:04:06,500 --> 01:04:08,180 I mean, sure, shit ain't moving around. 866 01:04:11,160 --> 01:04:12,160 Oh, my God! 867 01:04:12,680 --> 01:04:13,680 Adam's dead! 868 01:04:14,990 --> 01:04:17,950 about this. I mean, on one hand, I always did take pride in the fact that I 869 01:04:17,950 --> 01:04:20,710 would outlive him, but we did have some good times together. 870 01:04:21,390 --> 01:04:24,110 Look, Sugar Tits, why don't you go inside and get yourself a slurpee or 871 01:04:24,110 --> 01:04:24,828 something, okay? 872 01:04:24,830 --> 01:04:27,230 But I don't want to. I said get inside, bitch! 873 01:04:29,930 --> 01:04:30,930 I don't get it, man. 874 01:04:31,050 --> 01:04:32,890 He was alive just a little while ago. 875 01:04:33,150 --> 01:04:34,630 How long has he been in that trunk? 876 01:04:34,850 --> 01:04:36,890 You dumb queefs probably suffocated him. 877 01:04:37,090 --> 01:04:39,190 We're waiting for you, oh fearless leader. 878 01:04:39,490 --> 01:04:43,230 This isn't my fault. I told you to capture him, not kill him. Well, what 879 01:04:43,230 --> 01:04:44,230 fuck do we do now? 880 01:04:44,540 --> 01:04:46,500 Are you the civilians who caught the serial killer? 881 01:04:47,020 --> 01:04:48,560 You know it, we sure did. 882 01:04:48,780 --> 01:04:50,280 Congratulations, you're heroes. 883 01:04:50,500 --> 01:04:51,500 Nowhere is he. 884 01:04:51,640 --> 01:04:55,460 A chunk of our car. But see, the thing about that is... I'm amazed you were 885 01:04:55,460 --> 01:04:56,640 to restrain such a psychopath. 886 01:04:56,960 --> 01:05:01,380 Yeah, yeah, but see, what happened was, we kind of, sort of... Good work there. 887 01:05:01,700 --> 01:05:04,460 Now where's this guy? He's got lots of questions to ask. 888 01:05:08,440 --> 01:05:12,460 You've got to be kidding me. I know, I know. We didn't mean to suffocate him. 889 01:05:12,890 --> 01:05:13,788 Suffocate? Who? 890 01:05:13,790 --> 01:05:14,790 There's no one in here. 891 01:05:16,950 --> 01:05:17,950 Where could he have gone? 892 01:06:19,370 --> 01:06:20,049 Zombie attack! 893 01:06:20,050 --> 01:06:21,050 Zombie attack! 894 01:06:21,170 --> 01:06:24,870 Run for your life! Our worst nightmares have come true! Aw, dude, zombies aren't 895 01:06:24,870 --> 01:06:26,350 real. They're just a stupid thing. 896 01:06:29,530 --> 01:06:30,870 I can't take that risk. 897 01:06:31,130 --> 01:06:32,130 Shoot me! 898 01:06:32,370 --> 01:06:35,850 What?! Where is that hoodlum? 899 01:06:36,290 --> 01:06:40,070 He's gotta be around here... ...somewhere. 900 01:06:59,280 --> 01:07:00,600 Shoot me. I'm infected. 901 01:07:01,480 --> 01:07:02,880 Do it or I'll arrest you. 902 01:07:08,440 --> 01:07:12,020 Shoot me or I'll arrest you. 903 01:07:12,260 --> 01:07:14,600 I'd rather die living than be one of the living dead. 904 01:07:56,460 --> 01:07:57,459 I need backup. 905 01:07:57,460 --> 01:07:58,640 Man down. Man down. 906 01:08:03,540 --> 01:08:05,380 Not you now, you son of a bitch. 907 01:08:07,380 --> 01:08:09,500 Adam, there you are, man. Where the hell have you been? 908 01:08:25,550 --> 01:08:26,550 Oh, my God. 909 01:08:26,910 --> 01:08:28,050 Oh, my God, Ben! 910 01:08:28,750 --> 01:08:31,450 Oh, shit. What the fuck? 911 01:08:32,350 --> 01:08:33,950 Who just shot me? 912 01:08:34,330 --> 01:08:35,450 I don't know. 913 01:08:38,350 --> 01:08:39,689 You gonna be okay? 914 01:08:40,050 --> 01:08:41,810 That's not important right now, Adam. 915 01:08:42,590 --> 01:08:47,970 You need to go inside and win the bowling game so the team can go to the 916 01:08:47,970 --> 01:08:51,010 national bowling tournament in Hawaii. 917 01:10:02,030 --> 01:10:04,010 carved up like a dang dreaming turtle. 918 01:10:08,950 --> 01:10:11,030 You're the only turkey around here, Dario. 919 01:10:12,630 --> 01:10:13,630 Prepare to get - 920 01:10:40,040 --> 01:10:41,540 You're such a great bowler. 921 01:10:41,800 --> 01:10:42,800 Emily? 922 01:10:43,120 --> 01:10:45,960 I love you so much. Let's be together for forever. 923 01:10:46,940 --> 01:10:48,640 Whoa, whoa, whoa. What are you doing? 924 01:10:48,880 --> 01:10:50,460 Hey, what's going on here? 925 01:10:50,860 --> 01:10:55,420 We have evidence of you at multiple crime scenes. What? 926 01:10:55,820 --> 01:10:59,460 And I also overheard your little conversation with Dario at the cemetery. 927 01:10:59,820 --> 01:11:01,120 What conversation with Dario? 928 01:11:01,420 --> 01:11:03,280 She's an accomplice to murder, boys. 929 01:11:03,500 --> 01:11:04,620 Take her away. 930 01:11:04,920 --> 01:11:06,240 What? No, that's bullshit. 931 01:11:06,620 --> 01:11:07,620 Adam's the killer. 932 01:11:07,960 --> 01:11:08,960 Me? 933 01:11:10,200 --> 01:11:14,580 Stark Raven mad she is. Lock her in a loony bin and throw away the kid. What? 934 01:11:14,580 --> 01:11:15,580 No! No! 935 01:11:18,260 --> 01:11:24,380 Are you okay, kid? 936 01:11:24,600 --> 01:11:26,060 You look like you're in shock. 937 01:11:26,980 --> 01:11:30,520 I can't remember a thing. I feel like my head's been through a blunder. 938 01:11:30,960 --> 01:11:32,020 What day is this? 939 01:11:32,480 --> 01:11:36,400 It's your lucky day, kid. You just helped us catch two serial killers. 940 01:11:36,800 --> 01:11:38,280 And you're a hero. 941 01:11:49,040 --> 01:11:50,340 Don't you want to pick up that spare? 942 01:11:59,960 --> 01:12:00,960 Rock and bowl? 943 01:12:01,820 --> 01:12:02,820 Rock and bowl! 944 01:12:55,120 --> 01:12:58,120 you don't think about all of the dead bodies when we're doing it. Doesn't that 945 01:12:58,120 --> 01:12:59,200 make it more naughty? 946 01:12:59,560 --> 01:13:02,100 I guess. I just like the way how it feels. 947 01:13:02,560 --> 01:13:03,900 Me too, me too. 948 01:13:04,300 --> 01:13:07,160 Don't you think the possibility of getting caught makes it that much more 949 01:13:07,160 --> 01:13:09,660 thrilling? Babe, no one's ever going to catch us. 950 01:13:19,260 --> 01:13:21,120 This is not a true story. 951 01:13:21,540 --> 01:13:24,180 What is real life, Bonnie and Clyde? 952 01:13:24,410 --> 01:13:27,290 And they played our kinky love game of death. 953 01:13:29,670 --> 01:13:33,250 How can you tolerate such a gross movie? 954 01:13:33,730 --> 01:13:34,730 I don't know. 955 01:13:35,350 --> 01:13:36,730 I'm just crazy, I guess. 956 01:16:53,100 --> 01:16:54,100 But that's the way it goes. 71523

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