Original subtitles

Are you ready, kids?

Aye, aye, Captain!

I can't hear you.

Aye, aye, Captain!

♪ Oh...

♪ Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? ♪

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants! ♪

♪ Absorbent and yellow and porous is he. ♪

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants! ♪

♪ If nautical nonsense be something you wish... ♪

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants! ♪

♪ Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish. ♪

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants! ♪

♪ Ready? SpongeBob SquarePants! ♪

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants!

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants!

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants!

Captioning sponsored by THE U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION

and NICKELODEON

and NICKELODEON

Ah, the Krusty Krab.

Through these doors pass all the many kinds of undersea life.

Through the double doors!

Away!

Also these guys.

I told you I'm not hungry, Mermaidman.

Nonsense, Barnacleboy.

We've got to keep up our strength

for the fight against evil!

What a dive.

To the register!

Away!

Can I help you?

A double Krabby Patty and coral bits for me

and a Silly Meal for the lad.

Uh, it's not for the toy, I just, uh...

I gotta fit in the tights, you know?

Whatever.

Five dollars, please.

You got it, Bucky.

Will this cover it?

No.

Listen, Big Nose.

That guy's been saving your butt

since before you were born.

Don't you got a Living Legend discount or something?

This is a restaurant, not a lending library.

And who're you calling Big Nose, Big Nose?

Hmm.

Hmm.

Hmm. Hmm.

Mm-hmm. Hmm.

Hmm. Hmm.

Hmm. Hmm.

The next time danger threatens,

don't expect any help from us.

I'm shaking.

Hmm... Mermaidman and Barnacleboy.

Mermaidman and Barnacleboy!

Must... get... autograph!

Ha!

Yah!

If you want to grow up strong like me,

you gotta make room for seconds.

Here comes our waiter.

Auto... graph...!

Holy sea cow, it's that sponge kid.

Quick lad!

To the invisible boat mobile.

Away!

Where'd we park?

Uh...

Can I have your autograph?

Can I have your...?

They're gone.

Mermaidman's belt!

Wait!

We'll find it with the invisible boat alarm!

There she is!

Yeow!

I told you we should've got the automatic.

Hey guys, wait up!

I've got something for you.

Floor it!

You forgot your belt!

You forgot...

Mermaidman's secret utility belt.

The emblem of submersible justice.

For 65 years, this belt has helped prevent

the fall of nations.

And pants.

I can't believe I'm actually holding it in my hands.

Well, I guess I should return it.

Or not.

I could just hold on to it until after work.

All alone with Mermaidman's belt.

I wonder what this button does.

Whoa...

The small ray.

Here's your shake, sir.

Hmm.

There you go.

Come again, sir.

SpongeBob!

What's going on in here?

Huh?

Why is everything all tiny?

I don't know.

What have you got?

Nothing.

No, really.

Nothing!

Let's see it!

No, no!

Is that Mermaidman's belt?

Yes.

Wow!

I can't believe he'd lend it to you.

Me, uh, either.

He didn't lend it to you, did he?

Please don't tell.

You stoleit.

Please don't tell!

Oh, I'm telling.

If Mermaidman finds out,

he'll kick me out of his fan club for sure!

Please don't tell!

Uh-oh!

There's the phone.

Don't!

I'm walking

towards the phone.

No!

I'm getting closer

to the phone.

Don't!

And now for the moment

we've all been waiting for.

I'm begging you!

Hello.

I'd like to speak to Mer...

What did... Ow!

Hello? Hello?

What did you do to me?!

I'm sorry, but you made me do it!

SpongeBob, if you don't return me to normal size right now,

you are going to be

in really big trouble.

Uh... uh... okay.

I said now!

Uh...

Uh... uh...

Uh...

Do you hear me?!

Holy fish paste!

Get it off me!

Get it off me!

Don't you know how to work that thing?

Uh, I can do it!

Stop!

I've got an idea.

Let's call Mermaidman and...

No!

I can't let you do that!

But there must be someone else who can help.

Someone smart and wise

with years of life experience.

Patrick!

Patrick, Patrick!

Oh, hi, SpongeBob!

I was at work

and Mermaidman and Barnacleboy came,

and I got this belt and look!

A Squidward action figure!

Let me play with him!

No, Patrick!

Fighter pilot!

Dive bomb!

Patrick!

And then a giant fist!

Patrick, no!

That's not an action figure,

that's the real Squidward.

I shrunk him by accident.

Oh.

And then comes a giant...

Wait, you don't understand!

This is serious!

I don't know how to un-shrink him.

He could be stuck like this

for the rest of his life.

Oh, don't worry about it.

He'll find love one day.

You think so?

Sure, but it'll be

with someone his own size.

Like this pickle!

See?

They like each other!

No, no, no, no.

Oh, if only I knew how to work this thing.

Let me take a look at it.

Hmm...

You know what the problem is?

What?

You got it set to "M", for mini.

When it should be set to "W", for "wumbo."

Patrick, I don't think "wumbo" is a real word.

Come on.

You know:

I wumbo, you wumbo, he-she-me wumbo.

Wumbo, wumboing...

I wonder if a fall from this height

would be enough to kill me.

Wumbology?

The study of wumbo?

It's first grade, SpongeBob!

Patrick, I'm sorry I doubted you.

Well, all right, then.

Let 'er rip!

It worked!

Oh, no!

Look!

SpongeBob's giant!

Can I be giant next?

Patrick, I'm not giant.

You've shrunk, too!

You're kidding!

Good thing I've still got this pickle!

Hey, now will you take us to Mermaidman?!

No!

He can never find out!

But I'll think of something.

I promise.

Until then, you'll be safe in this jar.

You know what's funny?

My pickle started out in a jar,

and now it's in one again.

Huh, it's like a pun or something.

It's only two people.

No big deal.

Nobody else saw it.

Howdy, SpongeBob!

Sandy!

What did you... For cryin'...

What did ya'll do to me?

I'm sorry, Sandy!

Mermaidman came in, and...

Hey, SpongeBob...

Hey, SpongeBob?

Hi, SpongeBob.

Hello, SpongeBob.

Whoo!

Sponge-Dude!

Whew! I'm gonna have to get a bigger jar.

SpongeBob, will you just face facts?

You've shrunken everybody in Bikini Bottom.

You've got to go to Mermaidman.

Oh, Squidward, he'll be so disappointed!

Well, you can't leave us small forever.

You don't understand!

SpongeBob...

You need to admit your mistake.

Mom?

Your mother's right, son.

Mermaidman will understand.

You're Mermaidman, you old coot!

Oh, yeah.

Mermaidman?

I'm so sorry.

It's just that I'm such a big fan,

and your belt... and...

Aw, don't worry, son.

I understand.

Why, I remember back when I first used the belt,

the year was nineteen, aught, eleventy-twelve.

Why, I believe the president then was...

Just tell him how to un-shrink us!

Oh, yes, the un-shrink ray.

Let's see, uh... uh...

Did you set it to wumbo?

What?

Get SpongeBob!

Now I have to drive five miles

to go to the bathroom...

In my own home!

And I need an elevator

to climb one stair!

We've been shrinking

for years!

But this is ridiculous.

Everything's too big!

I've got it.

Ta-da!

Since I couldn't make you big, I made the city small.

And now only one more thing to shrink.

Cheese!

I guess this is okay.

Yeah, what's the difference?

Good idea, SpongeBob.

Well, it's great to be back!

Huh?

Don't worry, Mrs. Puff, this is the one.

SpongeBob, think, think!

Turn that way, turn that way!

No, turn that way, left, left!

I can do this, Mrs. Puff.

I can do it, I can do it.

The driving test is over, SpongeBob!

Stop the boat!

Wait, I can do this, Mrs. Puff.

I can do this.

Oh!

The road, SpongeBob!

Get back on the road!

Got to pass the test! Got to pass!

Hey! What do you got against the melons?!

Look out!

This must be the night-driving test.

We're going to straighten you out!

This'll fix you!

Now let's get that one!

Barnacles! Did you see that?

Yeah! That guy had no front license plate!

Let's get him.

Hey, look at all those police.

I wonder if the president's in town.

Look out!

It is with great pride

that I officially open this unfinished bridge!

Where did I go wrong?

With the opening of my new boating school,

I pledge that as long as a student is willing to learn,

I shall never give up.

Hi, I'm SpongeBob SquarePants!

Hurry up with that truckload of fruit punch!

The seniors are getting cranky.

Alive!

I'm alive!

Oh, thank Neptune, I'm still...

All right, seniors, let's open these windows

so the world can see your nice white clothes.

♪ Gonna be a surfin'...

♪ Surfin'

♪ Surfin', it's gonna...

It's finally finished!

A memoir of my life, written in red ink.

Oh, barnacles!

SpongeBob, are you okay?

That depends.

Did I pass?

Freeze!

You're under arrest.

Hold it.

You can't arrest him.

He's just a student driver.

We're not talking about him.

But I don't belong here!

It's all a big mistake.

Yeah, I don't belong here, either.

Me, too. I'm innocent.

I belong here!

Okay, you can do this, Puff.

You can get through this without losing your sanity.

Oh, that's a road we don't want to go down again.

Positives!

Think of the positives.

Let's see...

I've got no more papers to grade.

Yeah!

In... in fact, no more work.

No more boating school classes.

No more driving.

No more SpongeBob!

No more phone solicitors.

No more SpongeBob.

No more company potlucks.

No more SpongeBob.

No more road rage.

No more SpongeBob.

No more insurance payments.

No more SpongeBob.

No more SpongeBob.

No more SpongeBob!

No more SpongeBob...!!

I think I'm going to likethis place.

Class just isn't the same

without Mrs. Puff.

Just the thought of her, alone and afraid in jail...

It makes me think about her being alone and afraid in jail.

I don't know how she's going to survive.

♪ Smelling the pretty roses.

♪ Happiness is just two kinds of ice cream. ♪

Oh, that poor woman.

And it's all my fault.

Maybe if I go talk to Patrick, he can ease my guilt.

Well, it sounds like it's all your fault.

Oh, you're right.

Mrs. Puff's in jail, and it's all because of me.

I'm such a barnacle-head.

Poor Mrs. Puff.

I know! I got to get her out.

But to get her outof jail, first we got to get injail.

How we going to do that?

All right, put the money in the bag!

Put it in!

Um, you're facing the wrong way, sir.

All right,

give me the money!

Will that be from your savings

or your checking account, sir?

Uh, savings.

May I please see some identification?

Sure. There you go.

Thank you.

Sir, we are showing a balance

of zero dollars and zero cents

for both of your accounts.

Oh.

Next!

That went better than expected.

Yeah, I didn't think we'd get Mrs. Puff out of jail this fast.

Don't worry, Patrick, we'll get into jail this time.

Hey, there's a couple.

Put your back in it, girls!

Look, Patrick, there she is.

Mrs. Puff, wait!

It's us... SpongeBob and Patrick.

That's funny.

For a second, I thought that yellow rock talked to me,

and its voice sounded a lot like...

SpongeBob. It's me, SpongeBob.

We're going to bust you out of here.

Come on, Mrs. Puff!

It's you!

What are you doing here?

Why did you follow me in here?

Why?

All right, Mrs. Puff.

It looks like this heat's gone to your head.

If you're going to talk to rocks,

it's time for you to go on kitchen duty.

Yes!

It... it must be the heat.

Yes!

Darn it!

Okay, Patrick, let's get out of here!

No, wait!

There goes our deposit on these costumes.

There you are!

Hey there, Puff Mama!

What's today's grub?

Hi, Donna.

It's chili, same as always.

Let me get you some.

Mrs. Puff,

it's me, SpongeBob.

When are these horrific hallucinations going to end?

No, it's really me!

I brought Patrick along, too!

Hi.

Why?!

Because we're going to set you free!

No, I mean, why'd you bring him?

He likes chili.

Now, quick, get in before someone sees!

SpongeBob, I am not going with you.

That's a good one, Mrs. Puff.

Now hop in, come on.

SpongeBob, I think she means it.

Oh, that's crazy, Patrick.

He's right, SpongeBob.

I'm staying.

But why?

I like it here.

These are my people.

And besides, if I'm in here,

that means I won't have to deal with you... you...

Uranium in the water supply!

See? Crystal clear.

Ah.

Excuse us just one second, Mrs. Puff.

Patrick, she has lost it!

She's completely institutionalized.

She's forgotten what it's like to live on the outside...

To not be in prison.

Coming to bed, honey?

Yes, dear.

We've got to remind her there is life other than this.

Mrs. Puff, if you come with us,

I'll stay after school and decorate the whole classroom!

For the last time, no!

I'm not going with you.

That's final!

Oh!

Talking to inanimate objects again, eh, Puff?

Get back to your cell.

No more kitchen time for you.

Quick, Mrs. Puff, hop on.

Guards! Guards! Come quick!

There's a crazed ex-student of mine

and his overweight friend here to break me out!

That's just raw material

used to make coat hangers.

You need some rest.

Psst!

Hop in, Mrs. Puff.

Guards! Guards! Come look.

Whoa!

They don't pay me enough to do this job.

Mrs. Puff, up here!

Guards!

Guards! They're back!

What's all the hubbub, Puff?

They're back!

Mrs. Puff, it's us!

What the barnacle is going on?

Get away from me!

Get away!

What are you talking about, Puff?

You can't fool me.

You're SpongeBob and that guy who likes the chili.

Let's face it, Puff, you've gone off the deep end.

Get in there, you!

You need a nice long stay in solitary confinement!

Oh, well...

Let's look at the positives again.

I'm finally away from those two.

Yes, all alone in my nice soft room.

Made of sponge.

I can pass the test, Mrs. Puff!

I can pass the test!

Freeze!

Your joyride's over, punk!

No!

What?

No, no!

What are you doing?

Help! Help!

No! No! Please!

I have a snail to feed.

I can't go to jail now.

This is not a good time.

No, please, please, I'm not a criminal!

I can't believe it.

It was all a dream.

I'm not going to jail!

Why would you go to jail?

You already did your time.

Huh?

Oh, it's just my imagination again.

So what's for dinner tonight, Puff Mama, chili?

Aw, forget it.

And NICKELODEON

Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org