Original subtitles

The highway hunter serial killer was taken into custody this morning. He's

terrorizing Oregonians for the past five years.

You guys hear he had four bodies just in his kitchen cabinets?

Must have one of those walk -in pantries. I love those.

A guy's a monster. Just a quick heads up, today we're going to meet... Oh my

God, Roger? I know him!

He was my patient. Back when I was an oncologist, I treated his osteosarcoma.

His last doctor turned him away, said it was hopeless. But guess who brought him

back from stage four?

Ya girl.

So what's he on the news for? Did he save a kid from a well or something?

Amongst his victims, two sisters, a mother of three, and a beloved Catholic

priest, all tortured and killed.

Now back to you in the studio, Katie.

why I came in here.

Today, Thursday?

Well, Kyle, your lab work and blood sugars came back unremarkable.

What did you say you were doing when you collapsed? I was at a froth game.

Frisbee golf. You were playing frisbee and golf? Froth, yeah. And I was just

watching my roommate's team. You passed out while you were just watching?

Must be pretty exciting.

It is.

Okay, we'll take it easy today. Stay hydrated. Matt will make sure you are

discharged. Yeah, your roommate's here. He said he's going to drive you home.

Whoa.

Hey, Ron.

Hey, buddy. You're okay.

You're okay.

Is he okay?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're fine.

Hi. You left us for a minute.

What's up?

Hey, Bruce, can you walk Mr. Casey and 104 through his meds? Hang on, I'm

ChatGPT write me some yo mama jokes. They are ruthless.

Cool. Well, you know, we can't send him home until you get in there, so.

Yeah, I'm getting the jokes for Mr. Casey.

What are you doing?

Oh, you know, just making things nice.

Joyce hired my old charge nurse, Pam, to come in and help out while April's on

maternity. She basically was like my mentor.

You know, she taught me everything I know.

Oh, isn't she, like, super spicy?

Um, no, not super spicy. She's a little spicy, like, um, you know, like a

chipotle mayo.

Keith. Hey, Keith.

Uh, your mom is so fat. My mom passed away in July.

Oh, sorry.

Okay.

Uh, your mama was so fat. And the last time Pam saw me, I was this nervous girl

who didn't know what she was doing.

What's she going to say when she sees me running this whole department?

Good job.

I'm proud of you.

I knew you could do it. I mean, there's lots of options.

I'm impressed with how far you've come. That's another one.

Get a room, you two.

Huh?

Oh, that's just what you say when two people are flirting.

We weren't even talking.

Well...

You know I'm gay, right? Know it. Love it.

Did forget, though.

News alert.

Stevie Wonder, age 75, legendary singer -songwriter.

Talks favorite chili recipe.

Okay, they should not scare us like that. I thought he died.

Well, that is going to be a horrible day, right? When Stevie dies.

That will be just awful, right?

Huh.

Right, Ron?

Not really.

Ron Leonard, everybody. You say the sky's blue, he says red. You say up, he

down. Not true.

Sky is blue, up is up, and I really won't care if Stevie Wonder dies.

Okay, well, I think you will.

I won't. I think you will.

I won't.

You will. I won't.

I know it's not PC to say, but celebrities are better than us, okay?

put on a pedestal for a reason.

Stevie doesn't get a big outpouring of grief. Where does that leave the rest of

us? Where does that leave the normies?

This woman loves to make things about herself.

Well, I'm not going to indulge it. Look at these Facebook posts.

RIP David Lynch.

Gone too soon, Alex Trebek.

This one hurts. I lost a part of my soul today.

This is from when Notre Dame caught on fire.

Hey, Brandon, the Pixus machine is jammed again. Will you take a look at it

me? I think Pixus is French for pain in my ass.

Pam! Hey!

Pam's here.

Hi. How are you?

Well, never retire. It's boring.

People look at you funny. You try to give them a sponge bath.

Oh, little Alex.

Charge nurse.

Yeah. You're struggling, huh?

Struggling? No.

I mean, the hospital's struggling. When isn't it, though? No, I'm there in this

little boat best I can, you know?

Alex, please don't make that noise. Also, the guy in 104 is still waiting on

med console.

Bruce, you haven't seen Mr. Casey yet? Come on, man. One sec. There's this rat

that's learned how to do laundry. It's preposterous. Oh, can I see? I love that

stuff. Oh, yeah, me too.

He's about to fluff and fall.

Hey, your charge here just gave you an assignment, slowpoke.

Okay.

First of all, it's Dr.

Bruce. Yeah, Bruce.

Bruce the moose. No. Big, dumb, and slow.

Get to work, moose.

Thank you, moose.

What are you laughing at?

The moose thing?

Well, it looks to me like cataplexy, which is a type of narcolepsy.

it's when someone experiences intense emotion, your muscles shut down, and you

could collapse.

Oh, good. So as long as I never feel an emotion again, I'll be fine. Well, not

every emotion. I mean, everybody has their trigger. Anyway, we're referring

to a specialist, and they'll help you figure it out.

How soon can I get seen?

They said like six weeks.

So I'm just a ticking time bomb until then.

Okay.

So we're probably thinking the same thing. We have to give Kyle a jump start

identifying his emotional triggers.

That's not our job. Not even a little.

But come on, it might be fun.

I disagree.

Come on. If we don't, who else will?

The specialist in six weeks.

Come on.

It's emergency medicine, Matt.

We stabilize and move on. Stop being such a tryhard.

What's a tryhard?

You know, like, oh, look at me. I do whatever it takes to be good at my job

help people.

Yeah, exactly.

No, it's bad and embarrassing.

Whatever. I'm going on break.

That was a good impression of my brain, though.

The new EHR system is just as frustrating as the old one. That's

same. Oh, I did come up with this whole color coding system to simplify things

that people seem to really, really like.

Yeah,

everything's pretty much in order, don't you think?

What's up with J -Lo over there?

You let your nurses wear earrings?

No, I've been very clear about this. Hey, Holly, what did we say about the

jewelry? Oh, sorry, I forgot.

Okay, let's not make a habit of it, yeah?

That's why I need a Pam on my team. Hey, Holly. Holly, sweetie.

Ow! Okay, now imagine that times a thousand, some drugged -up maniac gets a

of them and turns your earlobes into meat ribbons.

Okay.

Sorry. I mean, I hate to say it, but Holly's not going to wear earrings

And Bruce did help that patient, so, you know, pants two for two.

It's not like she hit her.

She just gave her a little flick, just like, oh, my God, that really hurt.

Okay, but I don't think she did it like that.

You know, and also, I'm fine now, so... Oh, Cherise, could we get some Chucks

pads and 12?

Yeah. Great.

Anything for the moose?

That's great. That's great. Though not exactly sure that nickname is caught on,

so.

We're all laughing. Me the most.

Hey, Sharice, think we could get those Chucks pads today, you big moose?

Whoa, dude.

Oh.

Sensitive moose. Moose? That's seriously not cool. Mad moose. And tall moose.

Yeah. I guess if everyone's a moose, then really, no one is.

Oh, well, yep, the moose thing ran its course.

We had fun. Me the most. What, the moose thing?

Doesn't bother me. It's a cool animal nickname.

I'm actually in pretty good company when you think about it. Bear Grylls.

Wolf Blitzer.

Larry Bird.

Seal. Aren't those their real names? Aren't you going through a divorce right

now, Chris?

Isn't there somewhere you need to be?

Cat Stevens.

That's another one.

You wouldn't get any more songs.

Huh?

If Stevie dies, I'm just saying, you wouldn't get any more of his songs.

That would be a pretty big loss, right?

So you're into the new stuff, are you?

Huh? Yeah. Why don't you name a song from the last 20 years?

What's that? Go ahead. Name a song.

Signed, sealed, delivered.

1970. Go on.

Isn't she lovely?

1976.

I like that new one. Sunshine Glory?

Yes. Thank you. I made that up.

Okay, we're talking about musical icons dying here. All right? It's pretty

heavy. I don't know. Remember when Prince died?

They played his songs everywhere for a week. It was kind of great.

I didn't think about that. I'm going to change my stance on this. Now I'm pretty

excited for Stevie Wonder to die because it's going to be a great week in radio.

He's blind.

How can you say that?

Oh, my God.

So, I was thinking we could use this to sort of test out which emotions trigger

you. Okay. That'd be amazing. How would you do that?

I don't know.

I guess I could scare you.

Yeah, okay. That wasn't scary, but... All right, no worries.

We will figure out something.

Sometimes Matt acts like he can somehow solve all of our patients' problems.

That's not how our job works, dude.

Yeah, it seems like Kyle appreciates what he's doing, but...

No, that's not how it works,

right?

Here is going to be a tricky one.

If you really want to scare him, you should show him his STD results.

What? What do you mean? What's wrong?

Okay, it's not fair.

Mark it off, Maddie.

Oh, my God. Are you going to help?

Seems like he can use it.

You're blocking a means of egress, Val. That's a safety violation.

Hi, Pam.

So, Pam crawled out of the devil's butthole and made her way back here.

That's great.

Come on.

Pam's just a...

You know, a strong cup of coffee.

Please. You used to hate her.

What? I never hated her. I maybe occasionally complained about her. She

tough on you, I used to find you crying in the on -call room.

She was tough on me because she saw potential.

She's like one of those coaches from a sports movie where the team thinks that

they're mean, and then they're like, whoa, there's a method here, and now

so good at sports.

Stupid. Try again.

So inspiring.

And the whole flight to Korea, I just thought about my grandma, my harmony,

I wanted to say to her, how much she meant to me.

But when I landed, I got the call.

She was gone.

And I never got to say goodbye.

That's horrible.

So it's not that then?

What? I was so infected.

I thought that was real.

It was real. That happened.

What's next on the list?

It's your eye money. Don't forget.

Thank you. Okay.

What's wrong?

I'm fine. I just got something in my eyes and allergies.

And Pam yelled at me.

It was in front of everyone.

It was my fault. I messed up. What happened?

She asked me to restock the trauma cabinet with three chromic gut sutures,

accidentally did two chromic gut sutures. And then she asked if I was

sabotage a hospital, or was I just stupid? And I said, neither. And she

that wasn't an option. So I said, if I have to choose, I guess I'm stupid.

And she said, louder.

And so I said, I'm stupid.

And she said, even louder. So I said, I am stupid.

I tried to explain that she's just a strong cup of coffee.

Whoa, okay, Angel Cheetah coming through.

Watch out.

Yep, old Cheetah Schweitz. Not old, you know, Beryl. You are a chatty Kathy,

aren't you?

Just loving the sound of your own voice, not Kath.

No, no, no, not Kath. I'm Moose. Bruce the Moose. Lock it in.

I'm good with Moose.

I'm good with Moose.

Hey, Pam, can I, um... Oh, what are you doing? Oh, it's my fault. I told Jessica

to fold the linens, but I forgot to say don't do it like a goddamn moron.

Um, listen, speaking of Jessica, all the nurses, really, um, you know, I try to

focus on coaching them in a constructive way to build up their confidence.

Yeah, right. Oh, Alex, you are a good nurse.

Oh, thank you. You could be a good boss, too, if you stop trying to get elected

prom queen and earn their respect.

I don't... I mean, I think people here respect me. That's not the... Could you

finish these?

The toilet's calling my name, and at my age, you'll learn to listen. Thanks.

Hey.

Bad Pam.

She's a real firecracker, huh?

Yeah, they don't make them like that anymore.

Nope. They sure don't. Yeah, you know, she can be a little...

She's cruel. I forgot how cruel she was. She's making everybody miserable.

Yeah, how about I give her a nickname? See how she likes it.

Fart? Oh. I don't know. Has she ever farted? Oh, I am sure she's farted.

She'd have had to. Yeah. Yeah, she's sick. Pam is awful.

Everyone hates her. It's because she sucks.

Yes. Hey, Pam, they're asking for you and two.

Hey,

I got you water.

from the things like you like. I don't deserve it.

Stop getting yourself up.

We tried.

It's not our job to solve everyone's problems, okay?

We were so close.

If it makes you feel any better, we really weren't.

Huh? Jeff?

You're still here?

Yeah, bro.

I'm not just gonna leave you here.

Oh, I got him. I got him. Oh, no, I don't. No, I don't. I'm so sorry.

Yeah.

Dang it, JP.

I cannot watch this woman dance anymore. Can you please just say you'll be sad?

Nope, can't do it.

Come on, you know you're going to be a little sad when he dies.

Listen, when somebody acts all sad because of a celebrity's death, that is

a bid for attention.

It's really more about their fear of their own mortality.

Watching the things they love fade away, that means they're next on the chopping

block. And I don't hide my fear of death in social performance, okay?

Damn, he convinced me.

I don't care if he dies either.

Come on!

Mystery solved. I finally figured out what's triggering me.

You're gay!

They didn't have a face for gay, which is pretty messed up, I thought.

Yeah, I know I'm gay.

I've known since I was ten.

No, Matt, the trigger is Jeff. He has feelings for him. Okay.

Well, I still feel like they should have a gay emoji.

Ella, I was hoping it wasn't that.

We're roommates and friends, and I don't want to make it weird.

Right. Well, I don't know how to help you now.

Listen, what you do when you leave here isn't our business, but you've got to at

least try.

Tell him how you feel.

If you hold it in, things always get weird.

Yeah, she's right.

It's actually like my grandpa always used to say, the only way out is

And he was talking about an eight -year prison sentence. But I think it also

applies to life.

Yeah.

Maybe I'll talk to him.

Thanks.

What did your grandpa do?

I'm not going to tell you that because I am ashamed.

Oh, my God. This is so bad. It's possible. Maybe she didn't hear us. You

wait. Stay here. Listen.

Like, can you hear me from all the way back here?

I think you're even louder.

What? She's going to kill me. You?

Now I'm going to have three nicknames. I'm going to make a call.

Do I want to know?

Um, yeah, we might have said some less than flattering things about Pam and

realized that she was standing right there.

What?

Okay, well, then who cares?

Talking smack about each other is like 95 % of what we do here.

But you wouldn't care if your boss heard you complaining about her.

Your boss?

She's not the boss anymore, Alex. You are.

She's just some lady. I know that. I just, I still want to impress her.

Okay, I, I'm a good nurse because of her.

When my ex and I got married, we got this puppy.

Pissed everywhere, chewed on everything.

So I got this shock collar and I told her to use it on the dog.

So like a year later, this dog is fantastic. And I said, man, that shock

really worked.

And she said, oh, I never use a shock collar.

He was just a great dog.

You're the dog. I get I'm the dog.

You know, it felt good helping that kid.

Yeah.

I wonder what's going to happen with his roommate, though. I kind of feel like I

need closure.

That's what sucks about this job. The patients never follow up with us about

their sex life.

But don't worry, I have fake Insta. Rebecca Von Bubblegum.

We shall stalk.

So you think they have a chance?

Maybe. Sometimes offices attract, I guess.

I'm going to round.

Yeah, yeah, for sure.

It's a question of liability.

I need to know that as a doctor, death is not the optimal outcome for you. So I

have made a list of famous people, special people. And if you can tell me

you truly do not care about any of their deaths, I will never bring this up

again. Okay. Here, I'll take a look at your list.

Don't care, wouldn't care, don't know him, don't know Kim.

Honestly thought he was already dead.

Is this helping? Okay.

You know what?

Death doesn't move the needle for you, so that is just, that's fine.

Oh, I didn't see this last name on the list.

That would be a bummer.

At first I was confused.

Paul Reiser? So random.

But no.

Get a load of this. Zoom in.

What's that say?

What's that say?

Oh.

seems cold because he doesn't care about celebs, but he does care about the

people in his life. And Ron the Grump cares about me.

I met Paul Reiser in 1999 on a cruise. We were standing in a buffet line and he

turned me on to Western Omelets.

So yeah, I will be sad when he dies.

I love that guy.

Pam, we need to talk.

Do we?

Yeah. I think that since the last time you were here, when you were in

Uh -huh. Thanks.

I was just coming to clean this up. Crazy day.

Yeah, that's okay, Matt. Just give us a second, okay?

Live your life, Matt. We like cleaning up your messes.

Oh, sorry.

It's just there was this whole mystery and... And where's your chocolate?

What? Doesn't Forrest Gump give out chocolate before he launches into some

boring story that nobody gives a... Lay off him, Pam!

Excuse me, you don't talk to me like that. Actually, I'm the charge nurse,

means that I'm in charge, not you. You cannot talk to people like that.

Also, it doesn't work.

I've worked on you.

No, I'm a good nurse in spite of you.

And if I'm a good boss, it's because you taught me what not to do.

You know what, Pam, I don't want you around my nurses.

You're done here.

Fine.

I'll get my stuff.

You know, you turned out to be a real turd.

And by the way, I heard everything you said about me.

I don't care.

Farewell, Madam Fart.

Roasted. Yeah, you know, you have to play a lot of roles when you're a boss.

Sometimes you're a teacher.

Sometimes you're a therapist or a cheerleader.

And sometimes you're just a friend.

You know, do I make mistakes?

Yes, absolutely. But at the end of the day, I... Sorry to... Interrupt.

Got your favorite drink.

Oh, I look forward.

Just a thank you for looking out for the nurses.

It means a lot.

Thank you, Holly. That's really sweet.

I was looking for approval in the wrong place this whole time.

That's not my drink.

Yeah, Pam had a point. I think Holly could do better.