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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:49,853 --> 00:00:52,447 Good morning, my little furry friend. 2 00:01:08,253 --> 00:01:09,811 Morning. Can I help you? 3 00:01:09,893 --> 00:01:11,884 Morning. West London Dept. Of Sanitation. 4 00:01:11,973 --> 00:01:15,363 You're probably aware of the rodent infestation along this block? 5 00:01:15,453 --> 00:01:18,206 - What are you talking about? - Rats. 6 00:01:18,293 --> 00:01:19,282 They can be discreet. 7 00:01:19,373 --> 00:01:22,570 But they can damage your stock as well as spreading nasty diseases. 8 00:01:22,653 --> 00:01:25,611 We don't have any rats! Let me see some ID, please. 9 00:01:34,693 --> 00:01:39,323 We'll be fumigating till about 12:00. I'd keep out of the way till then. 10 00:01:39,533 --> 00:01:41,171 And keep this to yourselves. 11 00:01:41,253 --> 00:01:45,007 Discretion is always the best policy where business reputations are concerned. 12 00:01:45,093 --> 00:01:46,412 Thank you. 13 00:01:56,613 --> 00:01:59,252 All right, she'll be here any minute. 14 00:02:00,413 --> 00:02:02,927 - Better make yourself scarce. - Yeah. 15 00:02:25,253 --> 00:02:27,721 - Good morning, Miss Gates. - Morning. 16 00:02:29,733 --> 00:02:31,689 - Is this it, then? - Yeah. 17 00:02:33,213 --> 00:02:34,532 Come in. 18 00:02:35,813 --> 00:02:38,281 I'll come right to the point, Mr. Pomeroy. 19 00:02:38,373 --> 00:02:41,126 You're a chancer. A beautiful chancer. 20 00:02:41,453 --> 00:02:45,082 But nevertheless, you're a furniture mover. 21 00:02:45,373 --> 00:02:48,285 What could you possibly know about fine art? 22 00:02:52,493 --> 00:02:55,690 Are you really going to pay £500,000 for it? 23 00:02:57,533 --> 00:02:58,852 Yes, I am. 24 00:03:01,413 --> 00:03:03,131 Okay, no, I'm not. 25 00:03:03,533 --> 00:03:05,967 My ceiling's actually £250,000... 26 00:03:06,053 --> 00:03:09,329 but I'm looking for a partner who can match me. 27 00:03:12,133 --> 00:03:15,250 You know, if this is genuine, it could be worth several million. 28 00:03:15,333 --> 00:03:16,971 I don't doubt that. 29 00:03:17,053 --> 00:03:20,762 Right. So, we will view the painting at my gallery together. 30 00:03:20,853 --> 00:03:24,163 If I am satisfied, then I will consider going 50-50 with you. 31 00:03:24,253 --> 00:03:26,403 That's incredibly generous, Miss Gates. 32 00:03:26,493 --> 00:03:29,485 I do warn you, I take some convincing. 33 00:03:32,253 --> 00:03:33,322 Bye. 34 00:03:34,253 --> 00:03:36,130 Yes, we're on. 35 00:03:41,413 --> 00:03:43,529 No, I'm staying put in Belgravia. 36 00:03:43,613 --> 00:03:47,288 Nurse, for the love of God, get rid of this! 37 00:03:48,213 --> 00:03:49,692 Unbelievable. 38 00:03:50,853 --> 00:03:53,526 - Does that woman ever shut up? - Tell me about it. 39 00:03:53,613 --> 00:03:55,012 What you got, Ernie? 40 00:03:55,093 --> 00:03:58,005 - Not much. - What's that? Nothing. 41 00:04:00,493 --> 00:04:02,961 Full house. Winner takes all, mate. 42 00:04:03,053 --> 00:04:07,331 Listen. You might want to consider watching that tell of yours. 43 00:04:07,853 --> 00:04:12,210 A tell is a little giveaway sign. Lets me know what you're thinking. 44 00:04:12,333 --> 00:04:14,847 Like when you've got a good hand, you start clapping... 45 00:04:14,933 --> 00:04:17,401 and roaring with laughter. Think about it. 46 00:04:18,333 --> 00:04:19,482 - See you. - Good luck. 47 00:04:19,573 --> 00:04:20,767 Nurse! 48 00:04:24,093 --> 00:04:28,211 I don't care what he thinks it's worth, go to £100,000 and no more. 49 00:04:29,693 --> 00:04:32,730 Right, I'm taking a walk. Send the car for me. 50 00:05:05,173 --> 00:05:06,572 Is that... 51 00:05:06,933 --> 00:05:09,731 Rachel's lawyer. She wants a settlement. 52 00:05:09,933 --> 00:05:12,766 - How much? - I guess that's in the envelope. 53 00:05:13,093 --> 00:05:14,128 Gonna pay? 54 00:05:14,213 --> 00:05:17,603 Don't rush me. I haven't even decided to open it yet. 55 00:05:18,213 --> 00:05:19,931 Come on, what's the matter? 56 00:05:20,013 --> 00:05:21,765 I don't know. 57 00:05:21,933 --> 00:05:24,766 Something just doesn't feel right. 58 00:05:24,853 --> 00:05:27,572 Mickey, there's a man outside looking for us. Me and Ash. 59 00:05:27,653 --> 00:05:29,245 Except he's Harry and I'm Gordon. 60 00:05:29,333 --> 00:05:33,121 - When he comes in here, tell him I'm dead. - And I'm in China. 61 00:05:36,613 --> 00:05:39,252 Look, I don't know who you're talking about, mate. 62 00:05:39,333 --> 00:05:42,325 - Do you expect me to believe that? - I'm sorry. 63 00:05:45,173 --> 00:05:48,245 Excuse me. You're looking for Harry and Gordon. 64 00:05:48,773 --> 00:05:52,129 I knew I had the right place. I think I deserve a word with them. 65 00:05:52,213 --> 00:05:53,202 I'm sorry, but they're... 66 00:05:53,293 --> 00:05:55,284 Don't tell me. Out of the country. 67 00:05:55,373 --> 00:05:57,887 Marrakesh. For the trade fair. 68 00:05:57,973 --> 00:06:01,488 Well, when they get back, tell them "well done" from me. 69 00:06:02,173 --> 00:06:04,562 They did me good. Very clever. 70 00:06:04,733 --> 00:06:08,487 If they want to see how clever they've been, here's my card. 71 00:06:15,093 --> 00:06:17,402 It was while you were inside. 72 00:06:18,093 --> 00:06:19,924 Yeah, we was bored of the small fish. 73 00:06:20,013 --> 00:06:22,891 We made one call from here. One ruddy call. 74 00:06:22,973 --> 00:06:25,771 And Naveen gets an itemized phone bill and he traces you. 75 00:06:25,853 --> 00:06:27,491 That's Chapter One, boys. 76 00:06:27,573 --> 00:06:30,724 No, it was sweet, Mickey. The rag trade, but international. 77 00:06:30,813 --> 00:06:33,043 The Rolex, the Jag. Worked the whole thing up. 78 00:06:33,133 --> 00:06:34,532 I looked like Rockefeller. 79 00:06:34,613 --> 00:06:36,808 I roped in the mark, Naveen. 80 00:06:36,973 --> 00:06:38,929 Has a T-shirt factory. 81 00:06:39,053 --> 00:06:41,521 - You did that? - Yeah. 82 00:06:41,893 --> 00:06:44,930 We planned on £20,000, but he wanted in for £50,000. 83 00:06:45,013 --> 00:06:47,925 If we'd known he was in trouble, we would have left him alone. 84 00:06:48,013 --> 00:06:50,004 But he was acting the big man. 85 00:06:50,093 --> 00:06:52,368 You took money from a desperate man. 86 00:06:52,453 --> 00:06:54,648 Is that what we are? Muggers? 87 00:06:55,253 --> 00:06:57,164 We thought he could afford to be fleeced. 88 00:06:57,253 --> 00:06:59,562 We ripped him off in good faith. 89 00:07:00,733 --> 00:07:04,203 This explains a lot of what I've been feeling recently. 90 00:07:04,733 --> 00:07:06,564 I think we're under a jinx. 91 00:07:06,733 --> 00:07:07,961 Come on. 92 00:07:08,893 --> 00:07:11,009 Why do we have codes, Ash? 93 00:07:12,133 --> 00:07:13,646 Because it's a decent thing. 94 00:07:13,733 --> 00:07:17,328 No, the decent thing is not to grift at all. 95 00:07:17,413 --> 00:07:21,452 And we have a code because bad behavior makes bad luck. 96 00:07:22,573 --> 00:07:24,450 There's no jinx, mate. 97 00:07:25,253 --> 00:07:26,368 Cut. 98 00:07:52,213 --> 00:07:54,647 Maybe we did pick the wrong mark. 99 00:07:56,853 --> 00:08:00,163 But it felt so good to be the inside man again, Mickey. 100 00:08:00,253 --> 00:08:02,448 You know, to feel that glow. 101 00:08:03,773 --> 00:08:06,606 Receivers. You can practically smell them. 102 00:08:08,813 --> 00:08:11,452 Rachel says I dragged her life into the gutter. 103 00:08:11,533 --> 00:08:13,489 I don't see it that way. 104 00:08:14,173 --> 00:08:17,210 But taking a desperate man for his last penny. 105 00:08:19,093 --> 00:08:22,130 You always say we have to live by our decision. 106 00:08:23,013 --> 00:08:25,322 And can you live with this one? 107 00:08:39,093 --> 00:08:41,448 One bag. And that's that. 108 00:09:12,893 --> 00:09:16,010 It's all right, I'm a friend of the sculptor's. 109 00:09:29,773 --> 00:09:31,843 Yeah. Impressive piece. 110 00:09:32,333 --> 00:09:35,564 Impressive use of the blobs there. 111 00:09:37,573 --> 00:09:39,723 I wonder what compelled him. 112 00:09:41,773 --> 00:09:45,083 I think if you look at the artist's earlier works... 113 00:09:45,173 --> 00:09:46,447 it becomes obvious. 114 00:09:46,533 --> 00:09:49,445 Earlier work? This is the only one. 115 00:09:49,853 --> 00:09:51,809 He was 19 when he died. 116 00:09:52,893 --> 00:09:56,249 I was thinking more of his childhood stuff. 117 00:09:56,373 --> 00:10:00,286 You know, some of his early pieces that he did in crayon. 118 00:10:02,333 --> 00:10:03,607 Teasing. 119 00:10:04,773 --> 00:10:08,448 What's it worth? £20,000. I'll think about it anyway. 120 00:10:10,733 --> 00:10:14,567 Of course, the Gates Gallery is usually viewed by appointment. 121 00:10:15,213 --> 00:10:18,011 - Are you one of her inner circle? - No. 122 00:10:19,613 --> 00:10:22,571 I just think that art is for everyone. 123 00:10:23,533 --> 00:10:27,606 Not when everyone includes all the poor struggling dealers and buyers... 124 00:10:27,693 --> 00:10:30,412 - that she's ripped off over the years. - How true. 125 00:10:30,493 --> 00:10:34,281 Meredith Gates likes to keep mere mortals at a safe distance. 126 00:10:34,533 --> 00:10:39,448 Dali's sketches go for inflated prices to satisfy vanity-driven eccentrics... 127 00:10:39,533 --> 00:10:41,364 with no real art appreciation. 128 00:10:41,453 --> 00:10:45,844 At least that's what I told him before I paid him a third of their real value. 129 00:10:46,413 --> 00:10:50,770 I've been hoping to write an article on her, maybe even an exposé. 130 00:10:51,253 --> 00:10:52,891 Just look at her. 131 00:10:53,133 --> 00:10:55,442 The only reason she's opened to the proles... 132 00:10:55,533 --> 00:10:58,889 is because she wants maximum publicity for her new Mondrians. 133 00:10:59,893 --> 00:11:03,090 - God, you're not a friend of hers, are you? - No. 134 00:11:04,133 --> 00:11:07,921 I am after a Mondrian myself. 135 00:11:08,933 --> 00:11:10,764 They're just for show. 136 00:11:11,493 --> 00:11:13,768 Bea Watson, art journalist. 137 00:11:14,453 --> 00:11:16,887 Daniel Pomeroy, collector. 138 00:11:19,773 --> 00:11:22,446 You're not really after a Mondrian, are you? 139 00:11:22,533 --> 00:11:25,001 I mean, Meredith would kill for another one. 140 00:11:25,093 --> 00:11:28,972 That piece in the middle she bought for £250,000. 141 00:12:08,493 --> 00:12:10,370 Right. This is Piet Mondrian. 142 00:12:10,493 --> 00:12:12,529 Born in Holland, 1872. 143 00:12:12,613 --> 00:12:15,002 These are a few of his paintings. 144 00:12:15,933 --> 00:12:18,652 Quite nice, but they don't blow your bollocks off. 145 00:12:18,733 --> 00:12:22,123 Suddenly in 1909... 146 00:12:22,213 --> 00:12:23,771 in comes the hippy shit. 147 00:12:23,853 --> 00:12:25,764 Few years later, this. 148 00:12:26,213 --> 00:12:28,932 Pay attention at the back. This is for your benefit. 149 00:12:29,013 --> 00:12:32,130 Most people reckon that Mondrian got all fired up... 150 00:12:32,213 --> 00:12:34,681 after seeing an exhibition by Picasso... 151 00:12:34,773 --> 00:12:38,368 and that's when he started boshing out the psychedelic trees. 152 00:12:38,453 --> 00:12:41,411 But there's a mystery involved. 153 00:12:43,293 --> 00:12:47,684 Some claim that Mondrian was playing around with abstract art... 154 00:12:47,773 --> 00:12:50,606 before Picasso even had a sniff. 155 00:12:50,973 --> 00:12:53,612 But because he was such an unassuming bloke... 156 00:12:53,693 --> 00:12:55,092 he kept it to himself... 157 00:12:55,173 --> 00:12:58,802 and only went public after Picasso. 158 00:12:59,013 --> 00:13:02,369 And do we know what that would mean, class? 159 00:13:03,493 --> 00:13:06,849 Mondrian could've invented a new type of art... 160 00:13:07,813 --> 00:13:10,691 but Picasso took all the glory. 161 00:13:12,573 --> 00:13:14,291 Give that man an A-plus. 162 00:13:14,373 --> 00:13:17,968 All right, so you've been to an art gallery and read a book. 163 00:13:18,053 --> 00:13:20,692 What's all this got to do with six figures? 164 00:13:20,773 --> 00:13:23,412 Well, suppose the mystery was solved. 165 00:13:24,693 --> 00:13:29,528 Supposing a painting was discovered that was dated, say, 1902 or 1903... 166 00:13:29,893 --> 00:13:32,930 - before Picasso invented... - Cubism. 167 00:13:33,013 --> 00:13:35,288 Before Picasso invented Cubism. 168 00:13:35,373 --> 00:13:38,092 And say this painting was a Mondrian... 169 00:13:39,893 --> 00:13:42,805 it would turn art history on its head. 170 00:13:42,933 --> 00:13:45,766 Exactly. And it's not like we gotta give them the Mona Lisa. 171 00:13:45,853 --> 00:13:48,083 We've got the mark, okay? Meredith Gates. 172 00:13:48,173 --> 00:13:50,641 We've got the bait: Mondrian. 173 00:13:50,733 --> 00:13:54,772 We fake the right painting, and all we gotta tell her... 174 00:13:55,133 --> 00:13:57,966 is how many noughts to put on the check. 175 00:14:03,013 --> 00:14:04,731 Let's take a walk. 176 00:14:11,333 --> 00:14:13,369 Have you heard of Icarus? 177 00:14:14,293 --> 00:14:17,330 'Course I have. He's a Bond villain, ain't he? 178 00:14:18,293 --> 00:14:21,285 Icarus flew too close to the sun and got burnt. 179 00:14:21,373 --> 00:14:24,206 Well, Mickey, guys like me don't get burnt. 180 00:14:24,293 --> 00:14:25,885 We get tanned. 181 00:14:26,093 --> 00:14:27,526 And what if we're jinxed? 182 00:14:27,613 --> 00:14:29,251 You talking about the grifter's jinx? 183 00:14:29,333 --> 00:14:33,087 Albert getting strapped by that gangster, then you picking up an extra bullet. 184 00:14:33,173 --> 00:14:35,528 You know, we're not accountants, are we? 185 00:14:35,613 --> 00:14:36,762 Shit happens. 186 00:14:36,853 --> 00:14:40,846 No, it's a bad vibe. I can feel it, and it's right on our heads. 187 00:14:44,093 --> 00:14:47,085 I've told you before, boys, Lara Croft is never gonna reply. 188 00:14:47,173 --> 00:14:51,530 No, this is a website for art dealers and antique buffs to swap stories. 189 00:14:51,613 --> 00:14:54,650 I'm running an e-mail conversation with meself. 190 00:14:55,253 --> 00:14:56,527 In Dutch. 191 00:14:56,613 --> 00:15:00,162 So what are your two fictional Dutchmen talking about? 192 00:15:04,333 --> 00:15:06,289 Mickey said no. 193 00:15:06,813 --> 00:15:11,284 I know. We got two art dealers gossiping about this new painting. 194 00:15:11,413 --> 00:15:14,883 One guy says to the other one, "Keep this to yourself." 195 00:15:15,173 --> 00:15:18,006 Now if that don't create a buzz, nothing will, will it? 196 00:15:18,093 --> 00:15:20,653 So you wanna draw Meredith Gates into this? 197 00:15:20,733 --> 00:15:24,442 If word gets to her that there's this mysterious new Mondrian out there... 198 00:15:24,533 --> 00:15:26,922 then suddenly it'll be a lot better for us. 199 00:15:27,013 --> 00:15:31,325 Marks are so much softer when they think they're the ones doing the running. 200 00:15:31,413 --> 00:15:34,644 And you think this will persuade Mickey to go along with it? 201 00:15:34,733 --> 00:15:36,325 There's no jinx. 202 00:15:36,493 --> 00:15:39,291 When we pull this one off he'll see that. 203 00:15:39,893 --> 00:15:42,168 He'll need a lot of persuading. 204 00:15:42,373 --> 00:15:43,362 I know he will. 205 00:15:44,093 --> 00:15:46,288 That's why I'm working on it. 206 00:16:25,573 --> 00:16:26,608 Mr. Hook. 207 00:16:27,173 --> 00:16:29,323 - Sorry to keep you waiting. - Not at all. 208 00:16:29,413 --> 00:16:30,892 And this must be... 209 00:16:30,973 --> 00:16:33,851 Jeremiah Hook. Bea Watson, art journalist. 210 00:16:34,893 --> 00:16:37,453 I'm not entirely sure why I'm here, Mr. Hook. 211 00:16:37,533 --> 00:16:40,605 Don't tell me you're here under false pretenses. 212 00:16:40,693 --> 00:16:43,844 - There you go. I took the liberty. - Yes, you did. 213 00:16:43,933 --> 00:16:45,366 I can't stay long. 214 00:16:45,453 --> 00:16:49,332 I've got a piece to deliver to Art World magazine and I can't upset the editor. 215 00:16:49,413 --> 00:16:51,722 Okay, let's cut straight to the chase. 216 00:16:51,813 --> 00:16:54,964 Mr. Hook is an international antiques dealer. 217 00:16:55,053 --> 00:16:58,648 He's recently come into possession of a small oil. 218 00:16:58,973 --> 00:17:00,611 What sort of oil? 219 00:17:00,893 --> 00:17:05,125 Well, it was signed by Piet Mondrian, dated 1902. 220 00:17:05,213 --> 00:17:08,330 There's a buzz about a new work on the Internet. 221 00:17:08,453 --> 00:17:09,932 Can I see it? 222 00:17:10,373 --> 00:17:12,523 Do you have it here in town? 223 00:17:13,933 --> 00:17:16,731 What you could do for us, Bea, is authenticate it. 224 00:17:16,813 --> 00:17:20,283 And in return I'd give you exclusive rights. 225 00:17:20,573 --> 00:17:21,767 To what? 226 00:17:22,253 --> 00:17:24,209 I may buy this painting. 227 00:17:24,373 --> 00:17:27,445 It is small but it is significant. 228 00:17:27,653 --> 00:17:31,123 I certainly could interest a few gallery publications. 229 00:17:31,493 --> 00:17:34,212 But I'm sorry, I wouldn't describe an early Mondrian... 230 00:17:34,293 --> 00:17:37,205 as all that significant to the wider world. 231 00:17:37,773 --> 00:17:38,808 I have to go. 232 00:17:38,893 --> 00:17:41,691 So do I. Forget we had this meeting. 233 00:17:42,893 --> 00:17:46,568 There's no story here. I'm sorry to have wasted your time. 234 00:17:48,013 --> 00:17:50,573 What do you mean, there's no story here? 235 00:17:50,653 --> 00:17:52,609 - Just that. - Actually... 236 00:17:53,373 --> 00:17:56,683 - there is a story. - Actually, there isn't a story. 237 00:17:59,213 --> 00:18:01,443 It's more than just a regular landscape, isn't it? 238 00:18:01,533 --> 00:18:03,922 Of course not. 1902? No. 239 00:18:04,813 --> 00:18:07,805 All right, Mr. Hook. 240 00:18:08,613 --> 00:18:10,524 If you change your mind... 241 00:18:12,293 --> 00:18:15,171 Sorry. I really have to go. 242 00:18:16,213 --> 00:18:17,692 - Bye. - Bye-bye. 243 00:18:19,013 --> 00:18:20,241 Hello. 244 00:18:23,253 --> 00:18:24,891 How did you know I'd turn up? 245 00:18:24,973 --> 00:18:27,168 Because I scented the invite. 246 00:18:28,853 --> 00:18:32,368 Did you have to go and gut the whole plan like a kipper? 247 00:18:33,533 --> 00:18:35,967 Did you not just see what happened there? 248 00:18:36,173 --> 00:18:37,162 Waiter. 249 00:18:37,333 --> 00:18:40,450 She wasn't interested until she thought that I wasn't interested. 250 00:18:40,533 --> 00:18:42,444 Now she's intrigued. 251 00:18:45,813 --> 00:18:48,407 Sorry, we can't drink this. It's sour. 252 00:18:54,093 --> 00:18:57,324 Remember, Tip Jones is the best forger in the business... 253 00:18:57,413 --> 00:18:59,881 but I trust him about as far as I can throw a horsebox. 254 00:18:59,973 --> 00:19:02,646 He plays mind games. He'll have you chasing your own tail. 255 00:19:02,733 --> 00:19:05,201 He's got a brain like a steel trap. 256 00:19:08,333 --> 00:19:09,732 There we go. 257 00:19:15,213 --> 00:19:19,365 Well, you hear about people reacting badly to anesthetic, don't you? 258 00:19:19,533 --> 00:19:20,886 Hernia op. 259 00:19:22,053 --> 00:19:23,566 Bloody tragic. 260 00:19:27,573 --> 00:19:29,291 I'm Mickey Stone. 261 00:19:31,853 --> 00:19:33,889 - We're out of here. - Wait. 262 00:19:34,933 --> 00:19:36,207 What for? 263 00:19:36,893 --> 00:19:40,283 If we stay any longer, he's gonna sing I'm a Little Teapot... 264 00:19:40,373 --> 00:19:42,682 and he's gonna poop in his hand. 265 00:19:43,573 --> 00:19:45,325 The show is over, Tip. 266 00:19:45,413 --> 00:19:47,688 We're here on serious business. 267 00:19:48,093 --> 00:19:52,530 If you do this job right, you're in for £100,000. 268 00:19:53,333 --> 00:19:56,086 So stop playing silly buggers. 269 00:19:56,253 --> 00:19:58,528 £150,000. Take it or leave it. 270 00:20:03,653 --> 00:20:05,803 ...belonged to the Venus de Milo. 271 00:20:05,893 --> 00:20:08,088 Going out to Texas next week. 272 00:20:08,253 --> 00:20:11,768 So this gallery owner's trying to get me on a forgery rap. 273 00:20:11,853 --> 00:20:13,571 Forgery? Moi? 274 00:20:13,653 --> 00:20:15,962 I don't forge, I clone. 275 00:20:16,613 --> 00:20:19,525 Anyhow, the whole trial's redundant if I can't stand. 276 00:20:19,613 --> 00:20:21,444 Hence the performance. 277 00:20:22,493 --> 00:20:25,371 So what do you think of this Mondrian scam? 278 00:20:25,893 --> 00:20:27,804 Pre-Picasso. Very cute. 279 00:20:28,453 --> 00:20:31,729 Total cobblers, of course. You wouldn't fool Saatchi's pet gerbil. 280 00:20:31,813 --> 00:20:33,963 But I thought you were good. 281 00:20:34,733 --> 00:20:37,770 Forgeries are generally sold to wealthy idiots. 282 00:20:37,893 --> 00:20:40,612 Movie stars, Japanese fishing barons who never bother... 283 00:20:40,693 --> 00:20:42,012 to get them checked out. 284 00:20:42,093 --> 00:20:45,165 You want to flog a fake Mondrian to Meredith Gates... 285 00:20:45,253 --> 00:20:47,687 a leading Mondrian collector. 286 00:20:47,773 --> 00:20:50,003 Okay. What do you need? 287 00:20:50,693 --> 00:20:54,447 A dozen Italian horsehair brushes, sizes 4 to 9. 288 00:20:54,773 --> 00:20:57,287 Reconstituted canvas circa the period. 289 00:20:57,373 --> 00:21:00,251 Not that that will get us around the carbon-dating. 290 00:21:00,613 --> 00:21:02,490 Yes, and an original. 291 00:21:02,573 --> 00:21:04,370 Come on. We can get you a print. 292 00:21:04,453 --> 00:21:06,409 I got pictures in books. 293 00:21:06,613 --> 00:21:09,969 I need to smell, caress, taste. 294 00:21:10,253 --> 00:21:13,051 I need a real Mondrian sitting beside me. 295 00:21:13,853 --> 00:21:17,448 After all, you're talking about originating a new piece. 296 00:21:17,573 --> 00:21:19,882 This has to be perfect. 297 00:22:08,973 --> 00:22:10,406 Hold on. Calm down. 298 00:22:10,573 --> 00:22:11,892 Can you hold on to that, please? 299 00:22:11,973 --> 00:22:14,533 - Sit there. - That was a shambles. 300 00:22:14,813 --> 00:22:17,327 Now get me Miss Gates. I need to speak with her at once. 301 00:22:17,413 --> 00:22:19,290 What? She's in Bristol. 302 00:22:19,373 --> 00:22:21,489 Well, get her on the phone. 303 00:22:22,573 --> 00:22:26,043 A man walks into your gallery and lifts a valuable painting off the wall. 304 00:22:26,133 --> 00:22:28,772 Why wasn't it bolted down? Where's your laser protection? 305 00:22:28,853 --> 00:22:30,889 I've seen garden centers with better security. 306 00:22:30,973 --> 00:22:33,965 - There's the cameras... - What's the downtime on the Mondrians? 307 00:22:34,053 --> 00:22:36,851 Those paintings must be out of shot for, what, 30 seconds? 308 00:22:36,933 --> 00:22:38,730 Only 20, as it goes. 309 00:22:40,293 --> 00:22:41,328 Who are you? 310 00:22:41,413 --> 00:22:44,007 Debonair Security Assessments. As you may be aware... 311 00:22:44,093 --> 00:22:47,085 there's been some recent theft attempts on London galleries. 312 00:22:47,173 --> 00:22:50,449 The Arts Council asked us to check what measures you have in place... 313 00:22:50,533 --> 00:22:51,522 for insurance purposes. 314 00:22:51,613 --> 00:22:55,242 We have the X-ray machines, and all the frames are tagged. 315 00:22:55,493 --> 00:22:56,767 You don't tag the canvases? 316 00:22:56,853 --> 00:23:00,971 No. Miss Gates' instructions. No one tampers with the paintings. 317 00:23:01,253 --> 00:23:04,450 Look, I think I'd better call Miss Gates. 318 00:23:04,653 --> 00:23:07,213 Yeah, recall her from Bristol early. 319 00:23:07,733 --> 00:23:10,008 She won't be annoyed, will she? 320 00:23:15,333 --> 00:23:17,528 Just tell me one thing. 321 00:23:17,613 --> 00:23:19,922 We did all right, didn't we? 322 00:23:20,493 --> 00:23:24,884 Gents, it is not often that a Debonair assessor is impressed... 323 00:23:25,213 --> 00:23:29,047 but this one just learnt the meaning of the word "humility." 324 00:23:34,573 --> 00:23:36,962 Here's the period canvas you asked for. 325 00:23:38,373 --> 00:23:39,601 This is for you. 326 00:23:39,693 --> 00:23:43,811 It won't pass close scrutiny but it should do the job for the swap. 327 00:23:44,733 --> 00:23:46,963 Good. I'll be back with the original. 328 00:24:10,333 --> 00:24:11,766 One, please. 329 00:24:13,973 --> 00:24:16,407 Rest of my party are on the coach. 330 00:24:16,493 --> 00:24:19,724 - Party? - Mondrian Appreciation Society. 331 00:24:19,973 --> 00:24:21,292 All right. 332 00:24:21,413 --> 00:24:25,486 I don't know if it's the economy of form or the elegance of his asymmetry... 333 00:24:25,573 --> 00:24:29,009 but he sets me alight. Is that crazy? 334 00:24:31,133 --> 00:24:32,282 What's this? 335 00:24:32,373 --> 00:24:34,682 That is the visitors' record. Sign it, if you like. 336 00:24:34,773 --> 00:24:37,207 I'll sign it. I'll sign right now. 337 00:24:53,453 --> 00:24:54,932 To you, free. 338 00:24:55,453 --> 00:24:58,365 Thank you. That is so kind of you. 339 00:25:13,413 --> 00:25:16,086 We handle these Mondrians all the time. 340 00:25:20,213 --> 00:25:22,488 It's another day at the office, really. 341 00:25:22,573 --> 00:25:23,801 Stop it. 342 00:25:25,333 --> 00:25:28,131 I like that crazy Dutch Neo-Plasticist. 343 00:25:31,733 --> 00:25:33,451 You're right. 344 00:25:35,533 --> 00:25:37,888 They're kind of late, don't you think? 345 00:25:38,253 --> 00:25:40,892 - Where are the loos? I'm peeing my pants. - Right this way. 346 00:25:40,973 --> 00:25:43,885 - Behind you. Straight through. - Thanks. 347 00:26:25,733 --> 00:26:26,961 See you. 348 00:26:30,773 --> 00:26:33,412 Wait. Where are you off to? 349 00:26:35,053 --> 00:26:36,372 What do you mean? 350 00:26:36,453 --> 00:26:38,250 What about your coach party? 351 00:26:39,693 --> 00:26:41,411 Wouldn't be the same. 352 00:26:41,493 --> 00:26:44,166 I like things a little more one-to-one. 353 00:26:45,173 --> 00:26:48,404 Know what I mean? Bye. 354 00:26:53,053 --> 00:26:56,966 For future reference, it's a good idea when transporting a painting like this... 355 00:26:57,053 --> 00:27:00,523 to use a muslin bag. Non-abrasive. 356 00:27:01,493 --> 00:27:05,805 You gotta help me rearrange this place. Tables there. Chairs in a row. 357 00:27:05,893 --> 00:27:08,327 Mondrian believed in order. So must I. 358 00:27:08,413 --> 00:27:10,563 It really does it for you, doesn't it? Art. 359 00:27:10,653 --> 00:27:12,052 Doesn't it for you? 360 00:27:12,133 --> 00:27:14,169 Listen, mate. My mum had a painting. 361 00:27:14,253 --> 00:27:16,289 Got it out of The Mail on Sunday. Massive. 362 00:27:16,373 --> 00:27:19,524 - A lot of dogs playing snooker. - Brushes? 363 00:27:20,813 --> 00:27:24,283 - These need to be distressed in vinegar. - Already done. 364 00:27:24,533 --> 00:27:28,492 And here are the oils you asked for. High lead content as requested. 365 00:27:28,573 --> 00:27:31,212 Got them off the Net. Different suppliers for each tube. 366 00:27:31,293 --> 00:27:34,649 You asked for five tins of pilchards. Why? 367 00:27:36,453 --> 00:27:40,287 It's a beach scene, so I took a trip to Brighton. 368 00:27:40,893 --> 00:27:43,168 Here's your pot of seawater. 369 00:27:43,253 --> 00:27:46,609 And here, I thought if he was painting on a beach... 370 00:27:46,933 --> 00:27:51,290 the sand would have gotten caught on the sticky canvas. 371 00:27:52,493 --> 00:27:54,324 In 11 days... 372 00:27:54,413 --> 00:27:58,247 an original Mondrian from 1902 will be in your possession. 373 00:27:59,253 --> 00:28:02,848 It will, for a brief time, fool the greatest art experts in the world... 374 00:28:02,933 --> 00:28:06,562 and it will dethrone Picasso as the father of modern art. 375 00:28:07,413 --> 00:28:12,168 Or it will be spotted immediately and we'll all go to prison for several years. 376 00:28:46,413 --> 00:28:48,802 - May I take these matches? - Yeah, sure. 377 00:28:54,813 --> 00:28:56,610 Hi. Sorry. 378 00:28:58,853 --> 00:28:59,922 I'm so glad you called. 379 00:29:00,013 --> 00:29:02,208 I'm sorry about the other day. I was a bit hasty. 380 00:29:02,293 --> 00:29:03,806 You can't be too careful. 381 00:29:03,893 --> 00:29:07,124 Tell me, was this piece uncovered in Amersfoort? 382 00:29:08,853 --> 00:29:10,764 Let's get some drinks. 383 00:29:13,133 --> 00:29:14,168 Come on. Amersfoort. 384 00:29:14,253 --> 00:29:18,451 Excuse me. Could I have a cranberry juice and a Sea Breeze for the lady? 385 00:29:19,373 --> 00:29:22,126 A town in central Holland, Mondrian's birthplace. 386 00:29:22,213 --> 00:29:24,852 Yes, it would have been nice if it had been uncovered... 387 00:29:24,933 --> 00:29:27,083 in Mondrian's hometown. But alas, not. 388 00:29:27,173 --> 00:29:28,606 Do you have a photo? 389 00:29:28,693 --> 00:29:30,331 No, I carry nothing with me. 390 00:29:30,413 --> 00:29:33,371 But I cannot stress the explosive significance of this find. 391 00:29:33,453 --> 00:29:35,489 I've been thinking about that. 392 00:29:35,573 --> 00:29:39,168 Could this be a piece from the Spanish expedition? 393 00:29:42,693 --> 00:29:44,445 Why do you say that? 394 00:29:44,933 --> 00:29:46,969 Hang fire. We're on to it. 395 00:29:47,213 --> 00:29:48,407 Albert. 396 00:29:49,213 --> 00:29:52,649 The Great Spanish Exhibition of 1921. 397 00:29:53,853 --> 00:29:57,163 The Great Spanish Exhibition of 1921. 398 00:29:58,013 --> 00:30:01,085 No, I'm talking about Mondrian's trip to Spain. 399 00:30:01,373 --> 00:30:03,807 - Of course. - Expedition. 400 00:30:06,453 --> 00:30:08,762 What a deaf cretin. 401 00:30:10,733 --> 00:30:13,042 Hurry up. He's sitting there like a lemon. 402 00:30:13,133 --> 00:30:14,361 Hold on. 403 00:30:14,613 --> 00:30:18,447 Mr. Hook, you're leaving me dangling. 404 00:30:19,333 --> 00:30:23,008 You think that this piece heralds from the trip Mondrian took to Spain... 405 00:30:23,093 --> 00:30:26,290 with his best friend Simon Maris in 1901. 406 00:30:26,973 --> 00:30:28,850 "As you know, no writing..." 407 00:30:29,093 --> 00:30:31,049 ...or painting remains from that trip. 408 00:30:31,133 --> 00:30:33,966 "Possible, though, that he might have met Picasso." 409 00:30:34,773 --> 00:30:37,924 Do you think he may have met Picasso out there? 410 00:30:38,813 --> 00:30:39,802 I knew it! 411 00:30:39,893 --> 00:30:43,408 You've uncovered an abstract Mondrian that predates Cubism. 412 00:30:43,813 --> 00:30:46,805 I have a small painting that needs verification. 413 00:30:48,693 --> 00:30:51,685 I would like an expert journalist on hand to assist. 414 00:30:51,773 --> 00:30:53,684 The wider world will have to be convinced. 415 00:30:53,773 --> 00:30:56,765 And they will be. In an exclusive. 416 00:31:00,893 --> 00:31:02,087 Why me? 417 00:31:03,493 --> 00:31:05,404 Why pick a fledgling writer? 418 00:31:05,493 --> 00:31:07,211 You're not a cynic. 419 00:31:07,293 --> 00:31:08,646 You have no axe to grind. 420 00:31:08,733 --> 00:31:12,965 And you strike me as being open to adventure. 421 00:31:14,813 --> 00:31:19,170 Just you wait. You wait until you can see it and touch it. 422 00:31:19,853 --> 00:31:21,730 - When? - Very soon. 423 00:31:27,373 --> 00:31:29,568 You do believe me, don't you? 424 00:31:33,093 --> 00:31:34,321 Actually, I do. 425 00:31:34,813 --> 00:31:36,690 Nobody does it better. 426 00:31:37,173 --> 00:31:40,165 - Makes me feel sad for the rest. - Yeah, right. 427 00:31:40,853 --> 00:31:42,047 Sorry, Stacie. 428 00:31:44,053 --> 00:31:47,284 You already knew about Meredith Gates' interest, didn't you? 429 00:31:47,373 --> 00:31:48,522 Did I? 430 00:31:49,653 --> 00:31:51,371 I know Mr. Pomeroy is keen to buy it. 431 00:31:51,453 --> 00:31:54,923 He's seeing Miss Gates today. Now, in fact. He told me. 432 00:31:55,253 --> 00:31:57,813 Well, he may be looking for a buying partner. 433 00:31:58,493 --> 00:32:01,007 He's dancing with a scorpion there. 434 00:32:01,813 --> 00:32:03,246 I have to go. 435 00:32:11,573 --> 00:32:13,086 Your bill, sir. 436 00:32:13,893 --> 00:32:16,361 My friends are picking up the tab. 437 00:32:20,013 --> 00:32:22,402 So you went to see Meredith Gates behind my back? 438 00:32:22,493 --> 00:32:24,563 All I did was froth her up a bit, you know. 439 00:32:24,653 --> 00:32:27,611 I told her I was gonna buy the painting for £500,000. 440 00:32:27,693 --> 00:32:30,571 You know, just take a gamble on it. She got all agitated. 441 00:32:30,653 --> 00:32:31,881 I'm telling you, Mickey... 442 00:32:31,973 --> 00:32:34,282 when we're ready to show Meredith this painting... 443 00:32:34,373 --> 00:32:36,125 she's gonna be so jazzed about it... 444 00:32:36,213 --> 00:32:39,364 she's gonna snap it up for £500,000 minimum... 445 00:32:40,093 --> 00:32:42,368 just to swipe it from under my nose. 446 00:32:42,453 --> 00:32:44,444 Seems this meeting has been all for the good. 447 00:32:44,533 --> 00:32:46,649 Yes, definitely. Very good. 448 00:32:47,693 --> 00:32:50,491 There is a teensy-weensy problem, though. 449 00:32:51,093 --> 00:32:54,608 Meredith thinks I run an import-export company in West Ken. 450 00:32:54,693 --> 00:32:58,368 And she's coming over tomorrow at 11:00 with her decision. 451 00:33:01,653 --> 00:33:04,292 Good morning, my little furry friend. 452 00:33:10,773 --> 00:33:11,888 Rats. 453 00:33:21,973 --> 00:33:24,407 - Good morning, Miss Gates. - Morning. 454 00:33:24,493 --> 00:33:27,246 Are you really going to pay £500,000 for it? 455 00:33:27,533 --> 00:33:29,922 My ceiling's actually £250,000... 456 00:33:30,013 --> 00:33:33,449 but I'm looking for a partner who can match me. 457 00:33:34,413 --> 00:33:38,008 You know, if this is genuine, it could be worth several million. 458 00:33:38,453 --> 00:33:42,731 Despite appearances, Mr. Hook is not a wealthy man. 459 00:33:42,813 --> 00:33:45,930 And if it does turn out to be worth millions... 460 00:33:46,573 --> 00:33:48,768 I think it's only right that he gets a cut. 461 00:33:48,853 --> 00:33:50,764 Mr. Hook will only get what we give him. 462 00:33:50,853 --> 00:33:53,287 If he wants any more, he can burn up his £500,000... 463 00:33:53,373 --> 00:33:54,647 chasing me through the courts. 464 00:33:54,733 --> 00:33:58,328 Right. So, we will view the painting at my gallery together. 465 00:33:58,413 --> 00:34:01,644 If I am satisfied, then I will consider going 50-50 with you. 466 00:34:01,733 --> 00:34:04,008 That's incredibly generous, Miss Gates. 467 00:34:04,973 --> 00:34:08,443 So you'll arrange this meeting with Mr. Hook? 468 00:34:08,533 --> 00:34:12,526 Sure. I've also invited a journalist, Bea Watson. 469 00:34:13,013 --> 00:34:16,767 I thought if this thing's genuine, we should bang the drum. 470 00:34:17,293 --> 00:34:19,249 Only if it's good news. 471 00:34:26,813 --> 00:34:27,882 Bye. 472 00:34:29,293 --> 00:34:30,885 Yes, we're on. 473 00:34:33,173 --> 00:34:35,448 We are so far from the jackpot. 474 00:34:36,653 --> 00:34:40,202 Any time you wanna give me some encouragement, just feel free. 475 00:34:40,293 --> 00:34:41,487 This is not a club. 476 00:34:41,573 --> 00:34:44,326 You're not earning a scouting badge for Grifting Grade 4. 477 00:34:44,413 --> 00:34:46,483 We are taking a person down for a lot of money. 478 00:34:46,573 --> 00:34:48,450 And we have so many hoops to jump through... 479 00:34:48,533 --> 00:34:51,047 not least of which is a painting we haven't seen yet... 480 00:34:51,133 --> 00:34:54,125 painted by a man we can't trust. And we are also art thieves. 481 00:34:54,213 --> 00:34:56,681 - Cool. - It is not cool, Danny! 482 00:34:56,853 --> 00:34:58,923 We're not crooks. We're miners. 483 00:34:59,013 --> 00:35:02,642 We mine people's greed. And these people can be dangerous. 484 00:35:04,613 --> 00:35:07,730 All I'm saying is that given our current form... 485 00:35:08,333 --> 00:35:11,450 I'm not about to start letting off champagne corks. 486 00:35:11,533 --> 00:35:13,683 Then why do it if you don't believe in it? 487 00:35:13,773 --> 00:35:15,570 Because we need the money. 488 00:35:15,653 --> 00:35:18,121 - What do you need the money for? - You'll see. 489 00:35:18,213 --> 00:35:19,771 Will I like it? 490 00:35:21,973 --> 00:35:24,407 Come on, we've got a lot of work to do. 491 00:35:24,493 --> 00:35:27,371 The painting will be ready in just one week. 492 00:35:38,773 --> 00:35:40,923 - All right, how am I looking? - Beautiful. 493 00:35:41,013 --> 00:35:43,049 Okay, so how about a good-luck kiss? 494 00:35:44,053 --> 00:35:45,327 Let's go. 495 00:35:57,493 --> 00:35:59,324 Where's Meredith? 496 00:36:03,813 --> 00:36:06,327 I hope you don't mind me bringing my godchildren along. 497 00:36:06,413 --> 00:36:08,483 They're on their way to a sixth birthday party. 498 00:36:08,573 --> 00:36:10,370 The theme is Renaissance. 499 00:36:10,453 --> 00:36:12,250 Off you go and play. 500 00:36:13,733 --> 00:36:15,883 They grow up so fast, don't they? 501 00:36:15,973 --> 00:36:18,203 Cheeky little fellows, aren't they? 502 00:36:19,813 --> 00:36:21,644 Where's the painting? 503 00:36:22,973 --> 00:36:26,363 Mr. Hook is bringing it even as we speak. 504 00:36:32,813 --> 00:36:34,087 Come on. 505 00:36:35,133 --> 00:36:38,728 Pilchards! What is this thing with pilchards? 506 00:36:45,813 --> 00:36:48,168 - Hello. - Good, you found the key. 507 00:36:48,253 --> 00:36:51,484 - Where's the painting? - Silver case, top of the cupboard. 508 00:37:20,573 --> 00:37:21,608 Excuse me. 509 00:37:28,493 --> 00:37:30,563 What the hell is going on? 510 00:37:35,173 --> 00:37:37,448 Mr. Pomeroy's assistant. Oh, Mr. Hook. 511 00:37:37,933 --> 00:37:39,491 I've got the case, but it's locked. 512 00:37:39,573 --> 00:37:41,848 There's no way to open it without a detonator. 513 00:37:41,933 --> 00:37:44,128 That's no problem. Hang on a minute. 514 00:37:46,213 --> 00:37:47,202 Hello. 515 00:37:47,453 --> 00:37:49,569 We need a code to get into the case. 516 00:37:49,653 --> 00:37:53,566 Yeah? You can relax on that. I've got that right here. 517 00:37:54,093 --> 00:37:55,845 - Text it to me. - Absolutely. 518 00:37:56,013 --> 00:37:57,002 Right. 519 00:38:03,093 --> 00:38:05,049 Albert, we're running late. Where are you? 520 00:38:05,133 --> 00:38:08,364 In position. Don't worry about us, just do your job, son. 521 00:38:08,773 --> 00:38:09,762 Right. 522 00:38:14,453 --> 00:38:15,727 You did bring your half? 523 00:38:15,813 --> 00:38:18,930 Yeah, ma'am. Banker's draft for £250,000... 524 00:38:20,053 --> 00:38:21,406 right here. 525 00:38:22,453 --> 00:38:24,444 Two minutes, I'm leaving. 526 00:38:38,493 --> 00:38:41,530 That's it. I'm leaving. Come along, my cherubs. 527 00:38:42,173 --> 00:38:43,322 Sorry. 528 00:38:44,973 --> 00:38:47,692 Sorry to have kept you good people waiting. 529 00:38:47,773 --> 00:38:49,491 Traffic was awful. 530 00:38:51,933 --> 00:38:53,286 Is this it? 531 00:38:55,653 --> 00:38:58,213 - Excited? - Yes, indeed. 532 00:38:58,813 --> 00:39:02,442 This case is security-coded and I have the code... 533 00:39:02,533 --> 00:39:05,001 here on my phone. 534 00:39:28,213 --> 00:39:30,886 Signed Piet Mondrian, 1902. 535 00:39:31,853 --> 00:39:34,413 It's in a style he wasn't supposed to employ until... 536 00:39:34,493 --> 00:39:35,892 Years later. 537 00:39:36,813 --> 00:39:40,567 There's quite a bit of dust embedded in the top layer. 538 00:39:42,453 --> 00:39:44,250 Picture has a smell. 539 00:39:45,093 --> 00:39:48,927 Fishy. Rank. Decay. 540 00:39:51,133 --> 00:39:53,931 Bears many of the hallmarks that Mondrian used later on... 541 00:39:54,013 --> 00:39:57,164 but it's interesting. There's a hesitancy about it. 542 00:39:58,453 --> 00:40:02,731 Almost like an artist trying something very new and scaring himself. 543 00:40:04,533 --> 00:40:05,761 My God. 544 00:40:11,973 --> 00:40:14,043 Well, if it's not a fake... 545 00:40:15,333 --> 00:40:17,164 then "My God," indeed. 546 00:40:35,893 --> 00:40:38,487 This is only an initial assessment, of course... 547 00:40:38,573 --> 00:40:41,929 but it would appear that this work bears the traits of a Mondrian... 548 00:40:42,013 --> 00:40:44,481 painted at the turn of the century. 549 00:40:45,333 --> 00:40:49,485 But this picture was painted on a fine-quality canvas. 550 00:40:49,773 --> 00:40:53,652 Mondrian wouldn't have wasted a top canvas on experimental work... 551 00:40:53,733 --> 00:40:55,610 that was unlikely to sell. 552 00:40:55,693 --> 00:40:56,842 He may have done. 553 00:40:56,933 --> 00:40:59,049 The man was meticulous and he was frugal. 554 00:40:59,133 --> 00:41:01,044 Most of his work was done on cardboard. 555 00:41:01,133 --> 00:41:03,010 Perhaps it was a commission. 556 00:41:03,093 --> 00:41:04,572 A commission? 557 00:41:08,213 --> 00:41:11,808 Nobody would have paid for something like this back then. 558 00:41:11,893 --> 00:41:14,885 Anyway, if it was a commission, we'd have records. 559 00:41:14,973 --> 00:41:18,761 It would seem, Mr. Hook, that the circus is over. 560 00:41:21,093 --> 00:41:24,210 What if he was hired to paint something traditional... 561 00:41:24,293 --> 00:41:28,605 so he splashed out on a good canvas, but the commission fell through... 562 00:41:29,213 --> 00:41:31,010 so he reused it? 563 00:41:32,213 --> 00:41:33,965 - The canvas. - Yeah. 564 00:41:34,333 --> 00:41:36,324 I like the sound of that. 565 00:41:38,333 --> 00:41:39,686 Follow me. 566 00:41:42,453 --> 00:41:46,412 If what you say is correct, Miss Watson, then there should be another painting... 567 00:41:46,493 --> 00:41:48,563 hidden underneath here somewhere. 568 00:41:52,733 --> 00:41:54,007 Nothing. 569 00:41:54,653 --> 00:41:56,530 As far as I'm concerned, you can burn it. 570 00:41:56,613 --> 00:41:59,286 Wait. If I adjust the resolution... 571 00:42:05,453 --> 00:42:06,966 A pentimento! 572 00:42:08,013 --> 00:42:10,732 A hidden landscape underneath. You see? 573 00:42:11,413 --> 00:42:15,326 When the commission fell through, Mondrian must have been furious. 574 00:42:15,413 --> 00:42:17,529 He vented his frustration in something radical. 575 00:42:17,613 --> 00:42:20,764 A beach scene like no other, ever. 576 00:42:22,533 --> 00:42:23,886 Mr. Hook... 577 00:42:27,813 --> 00:42:31,806 I will give you £500,000 right now, in cash. 578 00:42:33,013 --> 00:42:34,969 Sorry. What about my half? 579 00:42:35,053 --> 00:42:36,805 In cash, Mr. Hook. 580 00:42:36,933 --> 00:42:39,208 I might get five times that at auction. 581 00:42:39,293 --> 00:42:40,442 If it's genuine. 582 00:42:40,533 --> 00:42:41,727 You still don't think so? 583 00:42:41,813 --> 00:42:44,452 Put it this way. I'm persuaded to take a risk. 584 00:42:44,533 --> 00:42:46,967 But only if I have sole possession. 585 00:42:47,053 --> 00:42:51,808 I've a banker's draft here for £250,000! 586 00:42:51,893 --> 00:42:54,453 Mr. Hook, do we have a deal? 587 00:42:57,053 --> 00:42:58,566 Don't you dare. 588 00:43:04,933 --> 00:43:06,082 Deal. 589 00:43:19,053 --> 00:43:20,850 I've played a blinder, I'm telling you. 590 00:43:20,933 --> 00:43:23,527 Even when Meredith discovers it's a fake... 591 00:43:23,613 --> 00:43:25,649 she's not gonna want to do anything about it. 592 00:43:25,733 --> 00:43:29,203 There's no way she'd want her name splashed all over the papers. 593 00:43:29,293 --> 00:43:32,763 So, minus Tip's fee and other expenses, we're looking at... 594 00:43:32,853 --> 00:43:33,888 £60,000 each. 595 00:43:33,973 --> 00:43:37,090 That dream beach-house of mine is starting to look a lot closer. 596 00:43:37,173 --> 00:43:40,006 I can't believe you went for all that bad karma shit, Mickey. 597 00:43:40,093 --> 00:43:43,085 A man creates his own luck in this world, son. 598 00:43:52,253 --> 00:43:54,528 £150,000. 599 00:43:54,613 --> 00:43:58,686 Ta very much, but I'll take the lot, if you don't mind. 600 00:43:59,333 --> 00:44:00,322 What? 601 00:44:00,413 --> 00:44:03,689 Right now a friend of mine is waiting to call the police. 602 00:44:03,773 --> 00:44:07,527 They will tell the cops a Mondrian has been stolen from the Gates Gallery. 603 00:44:07,613 --> 00:44:09,569 They will give them your names. 604 00:44:09,653 --> 00:44:13,009 The cops will arrest you. They will find said painting. 605 00:44:13,093 --> 00:44:14,685 You will go to prison. 606 00:44:14,773 --> 00:44:18,652 And what is more, your identities will be blown by the national press. 607 00:44:18,733 --> 00:44:22,009 That will make it very hard for you to pull off any more cons... 608 00:44:22,093 --> 00:44:24,129 in sophisticated society. 609 00:44:24,333 --> 00:44:25,971 But there is salvation. 610 00:44:26,053 --> 00:44:29,045 Give me the half mil, the call is never made. 611 00:44:29,253 --> 00:44:31,403 Do you ever shut up, Tip? 612 00:44:31,693 --> 00:44:34,605 You've got all these fine things around you. 613 00:44:35,213 --> 00:44:38,410 You've got all your clever talk and all your yap. 614 00:44:38,893 --> 00:44:42,442 But you know what you are? You're just a tosser. 615 00:44:42,773 --> 00:44:45,333 Caravaggio was a vicious queen. 616 00:44:45,413 --> 00:44:47,768 Michelangelo shagged little boys. 617 00:44:47,853 --> 00:44:49,684 Bacon was an alcoholic. 618 00:44:49,773 --> 00:44:53,766 And Gauguin married a 13-year-old girl. Welcome to the art world. 619 00:44:54,533 --> 00:44:58,890 Just like your world, Danny. We are merely cockroaches with good tailors. 620 00:44:58,973 --> 00:45:03,125 So who is this friend of yours that's gonna call the cops then, Tip? 621 00:45:03,573 --> 00:45:05,529 I don't think you need to know. 622 00:45:05,653 --> 00:45:06,768 Easy. 623 00:45:08,093 --> 00:45:12,006 You can learn a lot from Mickey. He knows how to behave. 624 00:45:12,093 --> 00:45:13,685 I certainly do. 625 00:45:14,333 --> 00:45:16,244 Ten seconds, I reckon. 626 00:45:16,333 --> 00:45:18,972 Ten seconds. Until what? 627 00:45:19,093 --> 00:45:20,446 I called them earlier... 628 00:45:20,533 --> 00:45:23,650 and I think I just heard a car pull up outside. 629 00:45:24,413 --> 00:45:28,122 - 3, 2, 1... - What is this? 630 00:45:29,613 --> 00:45:31,683 D.S. Martins, Fraud Squad. 631 00:45:32,013 --> 00:45:33,924 Yes, come in, officer. 632 00:45:38,533 --> 00:45:41,331 You remember me, don't you, Mr. Jones? 633 00:45:41,853 --> 00:45:44,526 We've had a call from a neighbor. 634 00:45:44,653 --> 00:45:47,963 He says he saw you walking in the park, Mr. Jones. 635 00:45:48,173 --> 00:45:51,529 Now, what with our investigation under suspension on medical grounds... 636 00:45:51,613 --> 00:45:55,128 we felt it best to pop down here and have a little chat. 637 00:45:55,253 --> 00:45:56,925 We'll be off then. 638 00:45:57,373 --> 00:46:00,763 Bye-bye, Mr. Jones. Nice to see you. 639 00:46:02,253 --> 00:46:03,606 Lot of money here, sir. 640 00:46:03,693 --> 00:46:05,809 Yes. Nothing to do with us. 641 00:46:09,733 --> 00:46:12,486 - You knew he was gonna turn. - I was pretty sure. 642 00:46:12,573 --> 00:46:15,645 - We could have lost the lot. - I told you, flying close to the sun. 643 00:46:15,733 --> 00:46:18,122 But Tip can still turn us in with that painting. 644 00:46:18,213 --> 00:46:19,771 What's she doing here? 645 00:46:29,093 --> 00:46:31,926 Very clever. Give them back. 646 00:46:32,773 --> 00:46:35,651 Danny, this is the person who calls the cops... 647 00:46:35,733 --> 00:46:38,247 and tells them where to find a stolen Mondrian. 648 00:46:38,333 --> 00:46:41,211 Forgers often use students to fence their forgeries. 649 00:46:41,293 --> 00:46:42,931 She's a grifter? 650 00:46:43,253 --> 00:46:45,847 I'm a serious arts writer, thank you. 651 00:46:46,133 --> 00:46:47,122 Where did you meet Tip? 652 00:46:47,213 --> 00:46:49,249 At college. That's where they usually recruit. 653 00:46:49,333 --> 00:46:51,210 Everyone at college knew Tip. 654 00:46:51,453 --> 00:46:54,172 After you visited him, Tip called me... 655 00:46:55,053 --> 00:46:56,964 and we sort of came up with this. 656 00:46:57,053 --> 00:46:59,442 Great. So what happens now? 657 00:46:59,573 --> 00:47:02,451 How about you keep your money... 658 00:47:03,253 --> 00:47:05,130 and I'll hang on to the Mondrian. 659 00:47:05,213 --> 00:47:08,444 No, the Mondrian has to go back. That's the way we work. 660 00:47:08,533 --> 00:47:10,728 Well, it's not the way I work. 661 00:47:12,973 --> 00:47:15,487 Well, if you can live with that... 662 00:47:28,053 --> 00:47:29,645 What are you doing here? 663 00:47:29,733 --> 00:47:32,372 - How'd it go, boys? - Not bad. 664 00:47:36,733 --> 00:47:37,802 Don't! You all right? 665 00:47:37,893 --> 00:47:41,010 Don't worry, it was my fault. I stepped out in front of you. 666 00:47:41,093 --> 00:47:42,128 I didn't even see you. 667 00:47:42,213 --> 00:47:45,011 Can't bend me leg. I landed awkward. 668 00:47:45,093 --> 00:47:46,572 It never happened to me before. 669 00:47:46,653 --> 00:47:50,407 Look at that, I can move it. Don't worry, love, I'll be fine. 670 00:47:51,093 --> 00:47:53,891 Yeah, it was nice working the flop again. 671 00:47:55,213 --> 00:47:57,443 So how did you know she was lying? 672 00:47:57,533 --> 00:47:59,012 At the cocktail bar. 673 00:48:00,613 --> 00:48:01,932 You do believe me, don't you? 674 00:48:02,013 --> 00:48:03,890 She revealed a tell. 675 00:48:03,973 --> 00:48:07,283 Actually, I do. 676 00:48:07,373 --> 00:48:08,806 I double-checked it. 677 00:48:08,893 --> 00:48:10,121 Excited? 678 00:48:10,733 --> 00:48:13,008 The throat-slash. A classic tell. 679 00:48:13,093 --> 00:48:14,082 Yes, indeed. 680 00:48:14,173 --> 00:48:16,687 Usually associated with feelings of guilt. 681 00:48:16,773 --> 00:48:18,843 So you double-guessed the double-cross. 682 00:48:18,933 --> 00:48:21,208 I just took out some insurance. 683 00:48:22,133 --> 00:48:24,772 Well, take away the expenses... 684 00:48:24,893 --> 00:48:26,963 we've still got over £300,000 in the pot. 685 00:48:27,053 --> 00:48:30,170 £200,000. £100,000 is going somewhere else. 686 00:48:34,733 --> 00:48:35,927 Where? 687 00:48:39,373 --> 00:48:40,965 No, no way. You can't. 688 00:48:41,053 --> 00:48:44,204 I'm sorry. But if we don't, this man loses everything because of us. 689 00:48:44,293 --> 00:48:46,204 And that'll jinx us forever. 690 00:48:46,293 --> 00:48:48,249 You don't believe all this crap, do you, Ash? 691 00:48:48,333 --> 00:48:49,607 We gotta do it, Danny. 692 00:48:49,693 --> 00:48:51,923 - Stace? - Let it go, Danny. 693 00:48:53,333 --> 00:48:56,245 Look, £100,000 pays Naveen back and makes amends. 694 00:48:56,333 --> 00:48:57,891 Danny, we're not thieves. 695 00:48:57,973 --> 00:48:59,326 Danny, come on. 696 00:48:59,413 --> 00:49:01,881 This was my grift, all right? 697 00:49:02,813 --> 00:49:04,565 You should've told me. 698 00:49:04,653 --> 00:49:06,848 You're right. I'm sorry. 699 00:49:07,573 --> 00:49:11,248 Okay, Danny, you decide what happens next. 700 00:49:12,813 --> 00:49:14,405 Danny, come on. 701 00:49:15,373 --> 00:49:17,933 Only please make sure whatever decision you make... 702 00:49:18,013 --> 00:49:19,731 you can live with. 703 00:49:20,413 --> 00:49:22,608 Because what's done is done. 704 00:49:31,133 --> 00:49:33,203 As you know, the receivers are in. 705 00:49:36,333 --> 00:49:38,449 ...so sorry, everyone. 706 00:50:32,653 --> 00:50:35,690 Bollocks. It's only money, isn't it? 707 00:50:36,253 --> 00:50:38,972 Anyway, I've got a great new idea. 708 00:50:39,093 --> 00:50:41,527 Right, clear your minds, picture this: 709 00:50:41,773 --> 00:50:45,288 We've got half of a cow, a small Shetland pony... 710 00:50:45,373 --> 00:50:47,603 - and some embalming... - Tell me later. 711 00:50:47,693 --> 00:50:51,447 I'm glad this silly matter is settled. Come on, I'm buying. My round. 712 00:50:51,613 --> 00:50:54,366 That envelope from Rachel's lawyer. 713 00:50:55,213 --> 00:50:56,612 Did you ever open it? 714 00:50:56,693 --> 00:50:59,127 Yeah. I've decided to pay her off. 715 00:50:59,253 --> 00:51:01,642 - Jinx lifted? - Well... 716 00:00:00,500 --> 00:00:02,000 www.tvsubtitles.net 55897

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