All language subtitles for Dream On (1990) S03E01-E02 AI.en

I cannot believe it.
I cannot believe
what you're telling me.

Come on, it's not like
I shot Kennedy or something.

How can you not vote?

People in Uzbekistan
are fighting

and dying for the right to vote.

Well, then,
I probably shouldn't move there.

Look, Nedra,
I-- I always mean to vote.

You know? I do, it's just--

It's always on a Tuesday,
and you pretty much know
who's gonna win.

And I don't know,
I got tired of voting
for some guy

you wouldn't wanna see
running the country anyway.

Ladies and gentlemen,
Nancy, Ward Bond and I

are joined tonight
by Tommy Nolan.

And we think Tommy
is best qualified

to tell the story of
A Turkey for the President.

You know, I was gonna
have sex with you tonight.

But now
I don't even wanna have dinner.

I voted for Carter. Twice.

I hold you
personally responsible

for everything that's wrong
with this country today.

It's never a good thing
in a relationship.

- No, no, I didn't order that.
- It's from the lady
on the other side of the bar.

Boy, oh, boy! How about that?

Thank you.

Well, you looked like
you could use it.

First date?

What gave it away?

You know, I have to tell you,

I've never had a woman
buy me a drink before.

Well, to tell you the truth,

I have never bought a drink
for a man before.

Oh.

How was it for you?

It was kind of disappointing.

Actually, I thought I would feel

much more like
Lauren Bacall or something,

and I really felt
more like, uh...

...I don't know,
four bucks lighter, I guess.

But that's not your fault.

- Just--
- Oh.

Ooh.

But I'm glad I did it, I am.

I really needed to do
something different tonight.

You know, something not me.
You know what I mean?

What language is that?

Sure.

Anyway,
you don't have to stay there.

You don't even
have to drink that.

I just wanted to, you know,
try it, and I did,

and, so...

Thank you.

Oh.

- You're welcome.
- Mr. Tupper.

Your table is ready.

Oh, no.

Uh, I think I--
my date decided to--

We have nothing to lose.

Would you like
to have dinner with me?

Dinner? Me?

No, I don't think so, no.

Sorry, I can't. No. No, thanks.

Okay.

Although...

Oh, Martin, you really
shouldn't be so closed-minded.

No, no, no, no.

This is something I feel
very strongly about, you know?

You don't put
blueberries on cheesecake.

- Blueberries are for pie, right?
- Mm-hmm.

Sometimes the touch
of a woman's hand

can mean a great deal.

Your waitress
has gone home.

Perhaps you should as well.

Well, apparently
we've broken something.

You know, this was--
this was really nice.

May-- maybe you should do
something different more often.

Yeah.

I really ought to be
getting home now.

Sure.

Although...

Well, I've certainly
never done this before.

Sandra,
if you're not comfortable
with this, you know...

No, no, I am.

I am. I really am. I just, uh...

I think I better be going.

I understand.

Well, good night.

Good night.

Although?

And this you've done before?

Yes, I have.

Martin, make it wonderful.

Take me away.

Okey doke.

I'll give it a shot.

- Oh.
- Oh, sorry.

- Go back to sleep.
- Whoa.

Well, where are you going?
Where are you going? Stay.

Oh, I-- I-- I can't. Well, I--

Um, just close your eyes.

Well, c-- can I call you?

I'll call you.

Wh-- what is this?
A one-night stand?

Uh--

This is.

Oh, my God,
this is a one-night stand.

I let you buy me a drink,
you use me,

and then you toss me aside.

It's not a one-night stand.
Really, really, it isn't.

I'll call you.
I promise. I promise.

I had a wonderful evening.

Now go back to sleep.

I can't.

I can't.

I'm wide awake.

"Topless dentist."
Is it just a gimmick?

on the next
Eddie Charles Show.

Dan McCadden
is everything you're looking for
in a leader.

He's spent 15 years
on Capitol Hill,

most of them
in the House of Representatives.

He turned
his mother's button business

into a multinational
corporation.

He served two tours of duty
in Vietnam

and was prepared
to serve a third,
had the war not ended.

Dan McCadden doesn't just care
about the little guy.

He cares about all the guys.

Dan McCadden.

Congressman. Businessman.

Family man.

Dan McCadden
for the United States Senate.

He's what the country deserves.
Paid for by
People for Dan McCadden.

- Good morning.
- Don't start with me.

- Excuse me?
- I'm having one of those days.

Yeah, well, maybe I'm having
one of those days too.

That's no reason
to take your anger out on me.

There are some things
it is better not to bother with.

I apologize.

Martin Tupper's office.
Can I have a last name, please?

I'm not gonna
just tell him anything

till I get
some information here.

- Who is it?
- Shh.

You don't get it, do you?

I'm the gatekeeper.
I'm the sentinel.

- I'm the three-headed dog
that guards the--
- Toby.

It's some Sandra person.

She won't give me a last name,
but don't worry.

- I'll get it out of her.
- No-- I know who that is.

I'll take it in my office.

Fine!

Deprive me of what little
pleasure I get from this job.

Hello?

So, did you ever
fall back to sleep?

Yes. Yes, I did.

I had a wonderful time
last night.

So did I,
although I had no idea

how far you people were going
to get votes these days.

Oh. So you know.

How could you not tell me?

Well, I didn't think
you were interested in politics.

Oh, excuse me,
Mrs. McCadden.

Listen, I really
can't talk about this here.

Can you meet me someplace?

Absolutely not.

I should have told you.

Yes. Yes, you should have.

Well, I'm really sorry.

But I'm not really,
really sorry.

Because if I had told you,
we probably would have had
a very different night.

And I liked the night we had.

- Well...
- Wasn't too bad, was it?

No. No, not bad at all.

That's not the point.

I mean,
it shouldn't have happened.

Martin, yesterday
at 6:30 in the morning,

I had to meet
with 300 dairy farmers

who tried to teach me how to use
an automatic milking machine.

Believe me, it's not
as glamorous as it sounds.

And then
I had breakfast three times.

First with the Rotary Club

and then
with the Knights of Columbus

and then with some senior
citizens group

who insisted
that I square dance with them.

I keep thinking
about last night...

when I was kissing your arms.

You have very soft skin.

Well, so,
you were square dancing?

Then there was
this big group of women,

I don't know who they were,
but they gave Dan a plaque.

And then
we went to a cocktail party

and Dan told the funny story
about meeting Babe Ruth,

which really isn't very funny
and I'm pretty sure
never really happened.

You left
a little bite Mark on my thigh.

Did I?

Then after the photo session,
I went into the ladies' room

and I looked in the mirror
and I had this big grin
on my face

and I thought...

..."What the fuck
are you smiling about?"

I had to get out of there.
That's when I went to the bar.

Then I met you.

And I hope...

I hope
that I get to see you again.

Yeah, me too.
Say, look, why don't we go
have a sandwich someplace?

Maybe we can
straighten this out.

Well, I'm sorry, I just--

I just don't go out
with married women.

You know, it-- it's wrong.

And you get hit a lot.

Look, you may have no problem
with this sort of thing--

I've never done anything
like this before in my life.

But even if I never do
what I did again...

I'm glad I did
what I did with you.

Well, I--

Goodbye, Sandra.

Do you remember what happened
on your first date?

Well, we have a story
about a famous woman
and her secret love.

Well, at least
you were having a good hair day.

Toby, are you here for a reason?

There's some members
of the press here to see you.

Shit.

Hold it a minute.

- Mr. Tupper!
- Mr. Tupper, did you have--

Well, the American press.
What a delightful surprise.

All right, all right,
one at a time.
Blondie, you're first.

- Mr. Tupper, did you have
an affair with Sandra McCadden?
- Uh--

My head hurts.

I don't remember so good.

- No comment.
- Good answer.

- But there's pictures--
- He said no comment.

You with the lipstick.
You're next.

Have you seen the picture
in today's Post,

- and do you deny that
that's you with Mrs. McCadden?
- That's two questions.

You're out.

Isn't this you?

Maybe it is.

And maybe it's not!
Maybe it's a trick.

Maybe it's his head
on somebody else's body.

Maybe it's his twin brother.

- You don't know.
- Thank you, Toby.

Mr. Tupper,
did you or did you not have sex
with Mrs. McCadden?

Let's keep sex out of this.

I don't think my sex life
is any of your concern.

So you admit
you have a sex life.

Hey, whatever happened
between me and Sandra McCadden--

and I'm not saying
anything did happen--

is-- is between me and...
and her.

I love my wife
very much.

And I'm not about to let
some Martin Tupper destroy

what we've built
over the last 19 years.

- Mr. McCadden--
- Mrs. McCadden.

Mrs. McCadden, would you say
Martin Tupper seduced you?

If by seduced,

you mean
did he take advantage of her?

The answer would be yes.

Is it true, Mrs. McCadden?

Yes. Yes, it is.

She said what?

Hey, she picked me up
in a bar, okay?

She bought me a drink.
You can check the bar receipts.

If anyone was seduced here,
it was me.

What this man is doing
is a disgrace.

I don't know why this man
is trying to destroy our lives.

But with the primary
two weeks away,

it could be
politically motivated, or...

he could be a psychotic.

All I know is,

this has been
very hard on Sandra.

- Mr. Tupper! Right here!
- Please!

Easy! Easy!

Everybody will get
a crack at him.

Doris? And then Al.

Mr. Tupper, were you aware

that you were having an affair
with a married woman?

I keep trying to tell you,
when we met,
I didn't know she was married.

And when I found out
she was married, I broke it off.

But you do admit
you had sex with her
on at least one occasion.

Yes. Yes, we had sex.
On one occasion.

Mr. Tupper,
are you a sex addict?

Do I look like some maniac

that runs around in public parks
beating up on blondes?

Let me tell you something.
I'm a single guy, okay?

And every now and then,
I date women.

And yes, yes, occasionally,
I even have sex. Yes.

- Toby...
- Mr. Tupper!
Mr. Tupper, right here!

Wait till he gets
his sight back.

In the three days

since the McCadden scandal
hit the headlines,

we have uncovered 73 women

who claim to have had sexual
relations with Martin Tupper.

Oh, my God.

Seventy-three?

Well, you know
how these girls come and go.

They change their names.
Who could keep track?

I wonder what's on cable.

Among them
is actress Julia Montana.

We spoke with Julia
on the set of her latest movie.

Sure, I slept with him.

It was during the filming
of The Richard Stone Story,

for which I got
the Golden Globe nomination.

Um, it was a brief affair.

Frankly, I don't know
what all the fuss is about.

He was just okay.

- Ouch!
- Ooh!

- Bad press.
- Dissed by a nun, Dad.

- It's not what you want.
- Seventy-three, huh?

Shh!

Lenora Hempel of Utica, New York

has come forward
with the strongest allegation.

Who's Lenora Hempel?

We met off and on

over several years.

He insisted
on keeping our love a secret.

I have never seen
this woman before in my life.

He promised to marry me.

I loved Martin Tupper.

This is your baby, Marty!

This is your baby!

I'm naming him Roy
after your father.

Your father's name isn't Roy.

Nothing gets by you!

Martin, relax.

I know this is a difficult time,
but it'll pass.

Richard went through
the same thing in March

when that People magazine
article came out.

Judith, they named him
the sexiest man alive.

That's not exactly
the same thing.

Okay, I see what you're saying,
but the point still holds.

You can't let
the press get to you.

We go now live
to Jennifer Klarik.

I'm standing outside
the apartment of Martin Tupper.

They're out in the hall!

Oh. Here she is.

Whoa, whoa. I'm not here.

- Hey. Eddie. Eddie. Eddie!
- [indistinct talking on TV.

And according to sources,
it is here

that Martin Tupper and his
ex-wife, Judith Tupper Stone,

are still
secretly living together.

What?

Judith Tupper Stone
is currently married

to noted physician
and philanthropist, Dr.--

I do not live here.
I came to pick up my son.

Hey, Mom's on TV.

Mrs. Stone,
does your husband have any idea?

Idea about what?
There is nothing
to have any idea about.

Hey, this is cool.

Judith, just get in here.

Secretly living together?

Where do you people
get this crap?

Jude, shut the door!

Good night.

Well.

that was an extremely emotional

Judith Tupper Stone.

Now, back to you,
Terry, in the newsroom.

There were two more murders...

I thought
you handled that very well.

- Shut up.
- Man, you're going
about this all wrong.

You can't count on the press
to tell your side of the story.

What am I supposed to do?
Rent a billboard?

All right, all right.
I'll tell you what.
Come on my show.

You know, we're supposed
to do this thing tomorrow

with Amish transsexuals,
but if you want,

I'll bump them
and I'll give you a whole hour.

Really?

What are friends for?

I'll see what I can do.

Martin Tupper talks back
on the next Eddie Charles Show.

See? [laughs] Done.

Thank you.

So, Mr. Tupper, what did you do

when you found out
she was married?

Well, I broke it off right away.

I don't believe
in dating married women.

I'm speechless with gratitude.

Well, all I have to say is,

if you ever decide
to date a married woman again,

you just give me a call.

If you just tuned in,
we're talking

to victim of the press,
Martin Tupper.

Now, Mr. Tupper,
have you spoken

to Mrs. McCadden
since the incident?

No.

And that's fine with me.

I mean, this woman
has lied about me in the press,

and she's made my life
a living hell.

And I just want to put her
and this whole thing behind me.

When you took her home
to your apartment,

what were your intentions?

Was this just some
sort of one-night thing?

No.

No, of course not.

I-- I was hoping it would grow
into something much more.

And believe me,
I am not in the habit

of having one-night stands.

Oh, come on now.

Excuse me?

Not even, say,
with the stewardess

during Labor Day weekend?

I thought you were my friend.

Well, I suppose
we're all capable

of one regrettable indiscretion,

whether
it's with a stewardess or...

perhaps the daughter of an
important network executive.

I see your point.

Let me throw this at you.

Let's say
you're at a book convention,

and you have sex with two women
in a 24-hour period.

Now, would you consider that
one one-night stand or two?

It's getting a little dirty.

Huh.

That's-- that's
a difficult one to answer.

But I guess I'd have
to put it in the same category,

as if, say,
you had sex with triplets.

An interesting hypothetical.

And we'll be right back
after this word.

And we're out.

Are you insane?
What's the matter with you?

I'm sorry. You were lying.
I got a little carried away.

The stewardess, huh?
You had to mention
the stewardess.

Oh, please,
and if that important
network executive was watching,

I'll be hosting
the Home Shopping Club.

Oh, I'm sorry if I put you
in a difficult position.

- Fuck you.
- Fuck you.

...three, two.

Okay, we're back
with Martin Tupper, male bimbo.

You too, Brutus?

Well, I just wish this
whole thing had never happened.

And I regret any pain
I may have caused my husband.

Hello. Hello.

No, don't worry about me.

I just go back
to the issues of this campaign.

This Martin Tupper
seems completely unwilling

to let us forget this wretched
chapter in our lives.

- Bullshit!
- Instead he continues

to capitalize on it
for his own personal gain.

What gain?
Do you see any gain here?

- I don't see any gain.
Where? Where's the gain?
- Martin, get a grip.

If you'll excuse me,
I've got to get to the school.

I've got a little
league team to coach.

Don't forget to vote.

You!

Okay.

I'm gonna have
to talk to the guy.

Talk to him?

And say what?

I don't know.
I'll-- I'll just say--

I'm sorry.

I'll just wing it.
You know, I've just got
to set the record straight here.

Martin, you slept
with the man's wife.

I don't think
that he's interested
in bonding with you right now.

In my professional opinion,
he's probably more inclined

to hit you in the face
with a shovel.

Maybe you're right.

Don't we even get a hello?

Jeremy,
what happened to your face?

- Oh, my God, are you all right?
- I'm fine.

I just got into
a little fight at school, okay?

Jeremy,
you know your mother and I

do not approve of fighting.

Now, what happened?

This ninth grader
called you a dumb slut.

I'll kill him. Who is he?

Come on, come on, give me
his name. Give me his name.

Martin. Come on, Jeremy.
Let's put some ice on that.

You got to do something.

So, what I'm trying to say
is I never meant to harm you

or your campaign.

And I want you to know
I feel just terrible

about what's happened,
and you've got to believe me.

I want this whole thing to be
over just as much as you do.

So, anyway,
that's how I feel, and, uh...

I appreciate
you taking the time

to sort this whole mess out.

Thank you.

I'm willing if you are.

All right, Ben,
I'm willing also.

Who the fuck
do you think you are?

You screw my wife,
and then you have the balls

to come in here
and tell me how you feel?

You think I give
a rat's tit how you feel?

Well...

I don't think he likes me.

I ought to reach down your
throat and tear out your asshole

and wear it as a pinky ring,
but I'm not gonna do that.

You know why?

Because you already have
a pinky ring?

No.

Because you're the best thing
that ever happened to me.

- I don't get it.
- Me neither.

Pineapple chunk?

No. No, thank you.

I love these little guys.

I'm the best thing
that ever happened to you?

Martin, before we met,

people said I was a cold fish.

Not a single warm,
fuzzy human emotion
people could relate to.

Now I'm one of the most
human guys I know.

Men commiserate with me,
women comfort me,

I'm up 17 points in the polls.

But this whole media circus,

you said you wanted
to get back to the issues.

Yes, I did.

I'd rather be the guy that
wants to get back to the issues

than the guy that actually
does get back to them.

I might have known it.

He used me.

Where is he?

But I slept with your wife.

I know you did, and if you're
planning on doing it again,

please wait
until after November.

You fuck her once, I look like
a figure of compassion.

You fuck her twice,
I look like a schmuck.

Martin, don't you want one
of these? They're not in syrup.

What the fuck
are you talking about?

They're in their own juice.

You know,
I'm really not hungry now.

Thank you.

Congressman, the handicapped
children are here

for the photo opportunity.

Shit.

Well, it's been nice
talking with you and, uh,

Martin,
thanks for stopping by.

I'm sorry if you're having
a hard time right now.

But hey,
you did get to bang my wife.

Don't forget to vote.

Now where the fuck's
the handicap meeting?

Psst. Hi.

Come here.

- Hi, how are you?
- How am I?

- How am I?
- Shh!

How the fuck do you think I am?

Well, my money
would be on angry.

Good bet.

I mean, Jesus Christ,
we slept together once,

and you've been screwing me
ever since.

Hey, do you think
I'm enjoying this?

You think I'm having fun
ruining your life?

You're certainly good at it.

Look, I'm sorry
for all those things

I've been saying
to the reporters.

Oh, well, here's a novel idea.

Why don't you stop saying them?

Why don't you start
telling the truth?

I can't. It's just-- it's--

It's Dan. He...

He what?

I just can't.

Maybe you can't, but I can.

Now, look, he told me
some stuff in there,

and when I go to the press--

What are you gonna tell them?

That he's thrilled
this whole thing happened,

that he wouldn't even mind if
you and I slept together again.

Hmm. Well, actually,
I wouldn't mind that either.

Sandra?

Martin, he wants you
to go to the press.

- What?
- Well, that way you keep
this whole thing alive.

He'll deny everything,
nobody will believe you,

and that way
you'll wind up looking
like an adulterer and a liar.

So, basically...

you're telling me
that-- that I'm fucked.

We both are. Dan always wins.

Martin Tupper
represents everything

that's wrong with this country.

A selfishness,
a complete disregard

for one's fellow man.

When you vote
in the primary next Tuesday,

you're not voting for me.

You're sending a message out

to all the Martin Tuppers
out there.

This is our country,
and we're taking it back.

Yes!

Oh, I'm sorry.
I got caught up.

He's a very good speaker.

Fuck!

Goddamn pecker-headed
motherfucking cocksucker!

Look, the primary
is in six days, okay?

If I can just hang
on till then, I'm--

Oh, my God.

They're very good shirts.

Got 'em in extra-large for sure.

Oh, I gotta get one.

What?

Uh, for Richard.

I think things
are starting to die down.

I mean, nobody
stopped me on the street today,

and there's nothing
in the papers.

Hey!

Two screwdrivers,
a Rob Roy and a Martin Tupper.

So, you were saying?

- You're speech is free!
- Yes, siree!

And you've got your health.

Sure, we've got our health.

And tell me why not?

What do you want to watch, Dad?

I don't care.
Anything but CNN.

This man has all the oratory
skills of Billy Bibbit.

Yeah.

Hey, what do you think
about this Senate
Ethics Committee, huh?

Senate. Ethics.

Putting senators
in charge of ethics.

It's like going out of town
and asking Martin Tupper

to keep an eye on your wife.

What? It was funny.

It's just a joke, Dad.

I think it's past
somebody's bedtime.

Hello.

Yeah, hang on.

It's Dan McCadden.

Ever been to Hawaii, Martin?

No.

White, sandy beaches,
drinks with little umbrellas.

Pineapple chunks?

Best in the world.

Tell me about France,
you know,

'cause I haven't been there
either.

All right, Martin,
I know you had enough

of this little scandal,
and quite frankly, so have I.

Oh, really?
Is the press camped out in front
of your door day and night?

Huh?
Is your sex life the subject
of a pie chart in USA Today?

You see, that's
just the problem.

You're getting
more coverage than I am.

I see.

Now, here are two
first-class tickets to Maui.

Hotel room,
ocean view, rental car.

- Even got you the convertible.
- So that's it.

I've served my purpose,
and now you think

you can just ship me off
to some tropical paradise.

That's the basic idea.

I'm holding a press conference
this afternoon.
I'm gonna bury this thing.

Do us both a favor.
Get out of town.

No. Forget it.

I'm not gonna take
anything from you, because--

because I don't like you, Dan.

I think you're a disgusting,
vile, pernicious piece of shit.

Granted.
But that's not the issue here.

Do you want to spend next week
with the press up your ass?

Or would you rather be
working on your tan?

Say no, Tim.

Mr. Tupper, right here.
Right here.

Tell him no. Tell him no.

Attaboy.

Hang on.
Girl's got your itinerary.

Oh.

I believe
you two know each other.

Hello, Martin.

Hello, Sandra.

You're still very beautiful.

You wanted to see me?

What's this?

It's Fashionable magazine.

Yes, it is. Now, why don't you
turn to page 37,
tell me what you see.

Recipes
of the candidates' wives.

You told me to do this.

Yes, I did.

But I did not tell you
to give them

your grandmother's
goulash recipe.

Do you think I want people
to know you're Hungarian?

I don't see
why you should say that.

Do you ever think?

Is that brain of yours
good for anything

besides holding up your hair?

- I think I should go.
- Oh, hold on, Martin.

It's all right. We're done.

I'll see you
at the press conference.

When are you gonna get dressed?

Well, I thought, um...
I thought I'd wear this.

Green?
You're gonna stand next to me

at a press conference
wearing green?

Do you want those
jaundice rumors to start again?

I'm sorry.

I wasn't thinking.

It was just such a bright,
sunny day that I--

Sandra, you look like
a house in that.

You could put shutters
and a door on that
and give you an address.

- I think she looks great.
- Shut up, Martin.

He yelled at me.

I want you to go home

and put on
that blue and green one.

The pleats are slimming.

Congressman, the women's
rights people are here.

Tomboys. How do I look?

Thanks.

All right, Martin.

Be sure you see the girl
on the way out, huh?

Aloha.

You know,
you really do look great.

Look, it's really
not my place to ask, but...

what are you doing
with that prick?

I don't know.

I'm married to him.

He treats you like shit.

Oh, that was nothing.
Believe me.

What? Does he hit you?

Not in an election year.

Oh, Jesus, Sandra.

Get out, will you?

Just get out.
I mean, you don't need this.

Believe me, it's not that easy.

That's what I was kind of
trying to do with you.

And we all saw
how well that turned out.

Do you love him?

No.

No.

But this is me.

This is my life.
What else would I do?

Sandra, look, just get out.

Will you?
I mean, you don't need this.

I want to. I do.

But Dan would just--

I wouldn't even know
where to start.

Have a nice trip.

- I wish I could help.
- You can if you have any guts.

And I feel that if I am able

to forgive my wife...

and to put this
painful time behind me,

then the people of this state
should be able to as well.

It's time to get back
to the basic family values

that I have stood for
my whole life.

And it's time to get back
to the issues of this campaign.

I agree.

Mr. Tupper,
I'm glad you're here.

Gives me an opportunity

to extend my hand
in friendship to you as well.

- Call security.
- I thank you, Dan.

And I just
wanted you to know that--

Excuse me, Phil.

That even after
all that's happened,

you can count on
my vote Tuesday.

Because the Senate needs
more men like Dan McCadden.

It's very gracious of you,
Mr. Tupper.

Uh, now, if there are
no more questions--

And you know, Dan,
I hardly agree.

It's time we put this whole
unfortunate business to rest.

How true.
So we're going to move on now.

It was one night
of foolish passion.

- But that's all forgotten.
- Exactly.

Mom, what's Dad doing?

- I have no idea.
- But as long as
we're clearing the air,

there have been so many
rumors and accusations.

I think we ought to set
the record straight.

I think the record's pretty damn
straight as it is.

Come on now, Dan, Sandra.

I think it's time we told
the truth about that night.

It was a threesome.

Threesome?

It's a political term.

Oh, you are good.

And what a night it was.

He's clearly insane. Security!

Of course, Dan mostly watched.

He doesn't know
what he's talking about.
Sandra, tell them.

Mr. Tupper.
Mr. Tupper.

Go on, Kara.

Do it.

Well, darling.

We had...

done so many drugs.

- Drugs?
- Drugs?

I tell you,
she's one in a million.

Perhaps you don't remember.

But let me tell you,
it was some night.

And, you know,
the important thing is

we have to put that
all behind us now

and just get back
to the issues, right?

Right?

And with only
a fraction of the votes counted,

it appears former game show host
Kurt Carpenter

has taken the primary
with a strong 67% of the vote.

Lieutenant Governor
Dorothy Rutkin

placed second with 23%,

and Congressman Dan McCadden,

who only a week ago
was leading in the polls,

came in a distant
third with just 6%.

More news in a moment.

People always get
what they deserve.

No, no, no, no,
I didn't order that.

It's from the lady.

Hi.

Hi.

So, did you vote?

Yeah.

Yeah, I went with
the game show host, you know.

He's tough on crime.

I tried to call you.

No, I've been upstate
visiting my mom.

I've had quite a lot
of explaining to do.

Yeah, I'll bet.

So, how have you been?

I mean, life without Dan is...

Different.

Scary.

It's good.

I got an offer
to do a jeans commercial,

and some people want me
to host a cable show

and then there's that
centerfold thing,

but I don't think
I'm gonna do it.

But still,
I think I'm gonna be okay.

Listen.

You think you can find time
in your busy schedule

to take a few days off?

Why?

Have you ever been to Hawaii?