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1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:01,690
...and then I kissed him,
2
00:00:01,696 --> 00:00:04,204
and I think I caught
him off guard, because...
3
00:00:04,210 --> 00:00:05,710
he said I caught him off guard,
4
00:00:05,716 --> 00:00:07,807
and then he wouldn't talk to
me for the rest of the day.
5
00:00:07,813 --> 00:00:10,506
Wow! Your first bad boy.
6
00:00:10,711 --> 00:00:12,403
So, you gonna go full Russian now
7
00:00:12,409 --> 00:00:14,583
and start rockin' high
heels and a floor-length fur
8
00:00:14,589 --> 00:00:16,614
and drinking lots of soup?
9
00:00:16,989 --> 00:00:19,507
Do Russian women drink lots of soup?
10
00:00:19,513 --> 00:00:21,097
I dunno. I've never been anywhere.
11
00:00:21,103 --> 00:00:23,466
Well, I don't think we're
gonna date or anything.
12
00:00:23,472 --> 00:00:25,090
I mean, it was hot,
13
00:00:25,155 --> 00:00:27,088
but I don't really
think I'm Vlad's type.
14
00:00:27,094 --> 00:00:29,255
Yeah. You're way too vanilla.
15
00:00:29,261 --> 00:00:31,480
He probably went and made
out with some club skank after
16
00:00:31,486 --> 00:00:34,767
just to wash the taste of
nerd-mom out of his mouth.
17
00:00:34,773 --> 00:00:38,834
Say what you will but
"Nerd Mom" is doing a-okay.
18
00:00:38,938 --> 00:00:41,203
Check the, uh, scoreboard.
19
00:00:41,209 --> 00:00:43,123
Wes. Vlad.
20
00:00:43,129 --> 00:00:44,432
Two guys.
21
00:00:44,438 --> 00:00:47,118
Yeah! Scoreboard's a two!
22
00:00:47,321 --> 00:00:48,764
That's a two-ski!
23
00:00:48,959 --> 00:00:51,053
A deuce-a-rooni.
24
00:00:52,803 --> 00:00:54,608
Are you making fun
of yourself right now?
25
00:00:54,614 --> 00:00:55,814
No.
26
00:00:55,820 --> 00:00:57,802
♪
27
00:00:57,808 --> 00:01:01,222
♪ Keep giving me hope for a better day ♪
28
00:01:01,228 --> 00:01:04,643
♪ Keep giving me love to find a way ♪
29
00:01:04,649 --> 00:01:08,864
♪ Through this heaviness
I feel, I just need ♪
30
00:01:08,870 --> 00:01:14,247
- ♪ Someone to say everything's okay ♪
- Sync/Corrections PetaG - addic7ed.com -
31
00:01:14,253 --> 00:01:16,042
♪ Everything's okay ♪
32
00:01:16,048 --> 00:01:19,222
- ♪
- [ALARM RINGING]
33
00:01:19,228 --> 00:01:22,204
- [GROANS AND SIGHS]
- [ALARM CONTINUES]
34
00:01:24,163 --> 00:01:25,796
Hey... good morning.
35
00:01:25,802 --> 00:01:27,469
- Hey.
- 'Sup?
36
00:01:27,475 --> 00:01:29,653
- Mm.
- Hey. Paige, could you...
37
00:01:29,852 --> 00:01:31,052
Um...
38
00:01:31,058 --> 00:01:33,333
First of all, you're great. [CHUCKLES]
39
00:01:33,355 --> 00:01:35,357
Second, could you get
out of here real quick?
40
00:01:35,363 --> 00:01:37,052
- What?
- Lena and I agreed
41
00:01:37,058 --> 00:01:39,669
that we're not supposed to have
overnight guests in the main house...
42
00:01:39,675 --> 00:01:41,849
- Dear God. You people.
- I know. I know,
43
00:01:41,855 --> 00:01:44,675
I know, but you can go out, ring
the doorbell, come right back in.
44
00:01:44,681 --> 00:01:47,154
Cool offer, but I think
I'm gonna head home.
45
00:01:47,160 --> 00:01:48,871
Okay. But for the record,
46
00:01:49,332 --> 00:01:51,639
that's why I suggested
we stay at your place.
47
00:01:52,638 --> 00:01:55,541
Yeah, well, I like to
keep my place clean.
48
00:01:55,547 --> 00:01:58,139
- And... you're messy.
- No, I'm not!
49
00:01:58,145 --> 00:02:00,523
No, I have a credit at the
Container Store. They know me there.
50
00:02:00,529 --> 00:02:02,607
You're not literally messy.
51
00:02:02,613 --> 00:02:05,388
I mean, you and your
ex-wife and the musical beds?
52
00:02:05,394 --> 00:02:06,594
It's a lot.
53
00:02:06,600 --> 00:02:08,884
- Oh, come on. It's totally...
- [KNOCKING ON DOOR]
54
00:02:08,889 --> 00:02:10,089
Martin?!
55
00:02:10,095 --> 00:02:12,152
Oh crap. We're dead. Hide!
56
00:02:12,158 --> 00:02:13,924
No. We're 40.
57
00:02:13,930 --> 00:02:16,559
Eh, um... just a second.
58
00:02:16,565 --> 00:02:20,056
Dad, can I use your bathroom?
Mason's taking forever.
59
00:02:20,062 --> 00:02:21,542
Let's give Daddy a second.
60
00:02:21,548 --> 00:02:24,012
I think his special
lady friend is in there.
61
00:02:24,018 --> 00:02:27,211
[CHUCKLES] You see? Huh? You
see what I'm up against here?
62
00:02:28,112 --> 00:02:29,919
Your place, please.
63
00:02:29,925 --> 00:02:32,023
- How about tonight?
- I'm in.
64
00:02:32,029 --> 00:02:35,581
- [WINDOW SQUEAKS OPEN]
- ♪
65
00:02:35,587 --> 00:02:36,799
I'm not doing that.
66
00:02:36,805 --> 00:02:39,103
No, totally, I didn't expect you to.
67
00:02:39,172 --> 00:02:41,288
So, uh, seriously...
68
00:02:41,704 --> 00:02:46,039
[EXHALES SHARPLY] What... what's
the plan? Oh. That door? Okay.
69
00:02:46,045 --> 00:02:49,065
- Good. Uh... Oh...
- [DOOR CLOSES]
70
00:02:50,030 --> 00:02:51,230
[SIGHS]
71
00:02:52,933 --> 00:02:56,300
Look, we fell asleep last
night watching TV, okay?
72
00:02:56,306 --> 00:02:58,600
I'm an adult, I'm not gonna apologize...
73
00:02:58,606 --> 00:03:00,405
but obviously, I'm incredibly sorry.
74
00:03:00,411 --> 00:03:02,094
Well, since we're ignoring all the rules
75
00:03:02,100 --> 00:03:03,308
that we mutually agreed upon,
76
00:03:03,314 --> 00:03:05,607
maybe Vlad and I can work
inside the house today.
77
00:03:05,613 --> 00:03:07,675
There's virtually no room
to spread out in the garage,
78
00:03:07,681 --> 00:03:09,081
and we need a real work surface.
79
00:03:09,087 --> 00:03:10,860
Okay, yeah, I'm open to that,
80
00:03:10,866 --> 00:03:13,166
but will you stay with the kids tonight,
81
00:03:13,172 --> 00:03:15,774
while I go to Paige's
house for some privacy?
82
00:03:15,780 --> 00:03:17,429
Oh, yeah, privacy?
83
00:03:17,435 --> 00:03:20,101
The thing that dads love
but moms never experience.
84
00:03:20,107 --> 00:03:22,624
- Don't widen this.
- Fine, I'll watch your kids,
85
00:03:22,630 --> 00:03:24,098
but we're working inside.
86
00:03:24,523 --> 00:03:25,723
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
87
00:03:25,729 --> 00:03:29,242
♪
88
00:03:29,248 --> 00:03:30,572
Hey, Nathaniel.
89
00:03:30,578 --> 00:03:33,664
Morning, Mr. Dubs. Is Mason
Bourne on the premises?
90
00:03:33,670 --> 00:03:35,547
Checking to see if he wants
to walk to school together.
91
00:03:35,553 --> 00:03:36,859
Um...
92
00:03:39,298 --> 00:03:41,627
Um... sorry, bud, he...
93
00:03:41,814 --> 00:03:43,725
- he already left.
- No problemo.
94
00:03:43,731 --> 00:03:46,415
However, I would love to reconnect.
95
00:03:46,421 --> 00:03:48,407
Could you let him know I came calling?
96
00:03:48,413 --> 00:03:50,179
[CLICKS TONGUE] Will do.
97
00:03:50,185 --> 00:03:51,794
- Cool.
- Cool.
98
00:03:52,755 --> 00:03:53,955
Bye.
99
00:03:56,257 --> 00:03:59,579
What are you doing, treating
Nathaniel like that, huh? Shame on you!
100
00:03:59,585 --> 00:04:01,179
You guys went to pre-school together.
101
00:04:01,257 --> 00:04:03,954
Exactly! And he won't let go.
102
00:04:03,960 --> 00:04:06,561
We have nothing in common anymore, okay?
103
00:04:06,567 --> 00:04:08,737
I've been in a
relationship, for God's sake.
104
00:04:08,743 --> 00:04:11,244
- [CHUCKLES]
- And this kid still plays with Legos.
105
00:04:11,858 --> 00:04:13,657
May I have him?
106
00:04:13,740 --> 00:04:15,940
- Go get your bag. Go.
- [SIGHS]
107
00:04:16,228 --> 00:04:19,636
Mason, Nathaniel, he looks up to you.
108
00:04:19,642 --> 00:04:21,338
He looks up to everybody!
109
00:04:21,344 --> 00:04:24,118
He's tiny! And besides, I'm busy.
110
00:04:24,183 --> 00:04:25,583
There's this girl...
111
00:04:25,589 --> 00:04:27,292
Hazel. Always Hazel.
112
00:04:27,601 --> 00:04:29,023
Someone else.
113
00:04:29,097 --> 00:04:33,619
Whoa! The spell has been broken!
114
00:04:33,625 --> 00:04:35,515
My man! Who's the lucky lady?
115
00:04:35,521 --> 00:04:37,009
Her name's Bronwyn.
116
00:04:37,015 --> 00:04:40,344
What?! Bronwyn? You like Bronwyn?
117
00:04:40,350 --> 00:04:42,946
- That's hilarious.
- Why is it hilarious?
118
00:04:42,952 --> 00:04:44,922
She's, like, the most
pretentious girl in our school.
119
00:04:44,928 --> 00:04:45,936
Shut up, Mae.
120
00:04:45,942 --> 00:04:48,618
You're just mad that she got
voted lit mag editor over you.
121
00:04:48,624 --> 00:04:51,568
That's only because her dad co-wrote
"Diary of an Underpants Weirdo."
122
00:04:51,574 --> 00:04:53,687
He did? I love those books!
123
00:04:53,693 --> 00:04:55,796
Wow, she must be, like, super talented.
124
00:04:55,802 --> 00:04:57,992
Just 'cause her dad's a good
writer doesn't mean she is.
125
00:04:57,998 --> 00:05:00,186
- I'm way more talented.
- Mmm.
126
00:05:00,391 --> 00:05:03,091
Lena? Care to weigh in? Hmm?
127
00:05:03,097 --> 00:05:06,390
Who's a better writer, the
Underpants daughter or our girl?
128
00:05:06,396 --> 00:05:08,601
- [DOOR CLOSES]
- I am sure they're both gifted.
129
00:05:08,607 --> 00:05:11,726
You're not even listening!
Just side with me.
130
00:05:11,732 --> 00:05:14,910
I'm sorry! I would
need to read both first.
131
00:05:14,916 --> 00:05:16,116
No OJ?
132
00:05:16,122 --> 00:05:18,425
Oh, I'll pick some up
after I drop the kids.
133
00:05:18,431 --> 00:05:20,933
- Thanks, honey.
- You're welcome, honey. [SMOOCHING]
134
00:05:20,939 --> 00:05:23,206
- [SMOOCHES]
- [CHUCKLES]
135
00:05:23,212 --> 00:05:24,893
Oh, man, Paige was right.
136
00:05:24,899 --> 00:05:27,698
We are messy. We are messy as hell.
137
00:05:27,704 --> 00:05:28,999
LENA: She said that?
138
00:05:29,005 --> 00:05:31,300
Guys, in the car. Milo, let's go!
139
00:05:31,706 --> 00:05:33,401
Hey, I'm warning you,
140
00:05:33,407 --> 00:05:35,571
if Bronwyn steps foot in this house,
141
00:05:35,577 --> 00:05:36,841
there's gonna be hell to pay.
142
00:05:36,847 --> 00:05:38,681
[CHUCKLES] Whatever, Mae.
143
00:05:39,767 --> 00:05:41,556
[SIGHS] Sorry about all that.
144
00:05:41,562 --> 00:05:43,352
- What a madhouse.
- Hmm?
145
00:05:43,358 --> 00:05:45,275
- Should we get started?
- Sure.
146
00:05:46,360 --> 00:05:49,535
First off, um, what are we?
147
00:05:49,541 --> 00:05:51,111
[LAUGHS]
148
00:05:51,520 --> 00:05:52,937
No, seriously.
149
00:05:54,415 --> 00:05:56,120
Us. What... what are we?
150
00:05:56,126 --> 00:05:59,019
Do you mean what are we... romantically?
151
00:05:59,025 --> 00:06:00,338
Yeah.
152
00:06:01,364 --> 00:06:02,564
Nothing?
153
00:06:02,630 --> 00:06:03,836
Oh, okay.
154
00:06:04,236 --> 00:06:05,732
But, um...
155
00:06:05,829 --> 00:06:07,036
What, though?
156
00:06:07,362 --> 00:06:08,562
What, what?
157
00:06:09,434 --> 00:06:11,563
- The kiss?
- Yeah.
158
00:06:11,819 --> 00:06:16,460
I was just trying to prove to
you that I was over Martin...
159
00:06:16,466 --> 00:06:17,666
I see.
160
00:06:17,672 --> 00:06:19,071
I mean, I figured it was okay
161
00:06:19,077 --> 00:06:21,462
because you kissed me
first to make a point.
162
00:06:21,468 --> 00:06:24,353
And I didn't think you
were attracted to me.
163
00:06:24,359 --> 00:06:27,316
I wasn't. And I thought
you were deeply boring.
164
00:06:27,322 --> 00:06:30,918
Like a piece of printer paper.
165
00:06:31,794 --> 00:06:35,419
But then, the kiss was, uh...
166
00:06:35,425 --> 00:06:36,625
[CLEARS THROAT]
167
00:06:36,824 --> 00:06:39,208
- [CELLPHONE CLICKING]
- I knew the word.
168
00:06:39,394 --> 00:06:41,521
It's, uh... like...
169
00:06:42,783 --> 00:06:44,616
Ah, volcanic.
170
00:06:44,622 --> 00:06:46,980
- Really? Wow.
- Yeah.
171
00:06:47,518 --> 00:06:50,417
I mean, I... I don't know what to say.
172
00:06:50,423 --> 00:06:54,021
Well, I mean, is that possible
that we're at the point
173
00:06:54,027 --> 00:06:56,536
where we don't need words anymore?
174
00:06:58,021 --> 00:06:59,862
I don't think so?
175
00:07:00,491 --> 00:07:01,993
Um... [CLICKS MOUTH]
176
00:07:01,999 --> 00:07:04,086
maybe we should just put
a pin in this discussion
177
00:07:04,092 --> 00:07:06,782
and concentrate on the
boards for today's meeting.
178
00:07:06,788 --> 00:07:09,093
Absolutely. Very, uh...
179
00:07:09,099 --> 00:07:10,577
Super smart.
180
00:07:11,780 --> 00:07:14,122
So, um, I mocked this up...
181
00:07:14,415 --> 00:07:15,709
I like this color.
182
00:07:15,715 --> 00:07:18,609
What... what is the soap
you're using? It's so good.
183
00:07:18,615 --> 00:07:22,037
It's scentless. I'm
allergic to scent. It's...
184
00:07:22,043 --> 00:07:23,701
unscented.
185
00:07:23,707 --> 00:07:27,131
So what I'm smelling is...
186
00:07:27,740 --> 00:07:30,233
is just your flesh, huh?
187
00:07:30,239 --> 00:07:32,451
- ♪
- Mm-hmm.
188
00:07:32,457 --> 00:07:33,726
- [CLICKS TONGUE]
189
00:07:34,154 --> 00:07:35,438
[HUSHED] So good.
190
00:07:35,936 --> 00:07:38,098
- ♪
- [SCHOOL BELL RINGS]
191
00:07:38,387 --> 00:07:39,781
Hey, Bronwyn.
192
00:07:39,787 --> 00:07:42,985
Um, I was just wondering
if you could help me
193
00:07:42,991 --> 00:07:44,684
- with my short story...
- Mm.
194
00:07:44,690 --> 00:07:46,372
since you're such a
great writer and all.
195
00:07:46,378 --> 00:07:49,067
Oh, thanks. It's just in my DNA.
196
00:07:49,073 --> 00:07:51,584
I would share it with you
if I could. Or would I...?
197
00:07:51,590 --> 00:07:53,967
[LAUGHS LOUDLY]
198
00:07:53,973 --> 00:07:55,173
Barf.
199
00:07:55,479 --> 00:07:58,466
So, that's what your brother
looks like flirting, huh?
200
00:07:58,644 --> 00:08:00,042
Yeah. [SIGHS]
201
00:08:00,370 --> 00:08:02,378
Even grosser than I thought.
202
00:08:03,356 --> 00:08:05,763
I know I'll probably
never co-author anything,
203
00:08:05,769 --> 00:08:08,296
but, you know, if you
could just take a look,
204
00:08:08,302 --> 00:08:10,718
- just tell me what you think.
- Like a mentor?
205
00:08:10,724 --> 00:08:12,513
Or a... muse?
206
00:08:12,739 --> 00:08:15,343
Interesting. Mason told me
he couldn't hang out today
207
00:08:15,349 --> 00:08:19,033
'cause he had study hall, but it
would appear he just has... hall.
208
00:08:19,039 --> 00:08:20,624
Open your eyes, kid
209
00:08:20,630 --> 00:08:22,424
you're getting big-timed.
210
00:08:22,536 --> 00:08:24,717
It's so hard for me to
be creative at school.
211
00:08:24,723 --> 00:08:27,311
You know, I just... I
don't feel fertile here.
212
00:08:27,317 --> 00:08:29,416
Okay then, your place. After school?
213
00:08:29,422 --> 00:08:31,389
Cool! Coo... Cool.
214
00:08:31,660 --> 00:08:35,183
He's doing it! He's
actually inviting her over.
215
00:08:35,189 --> 00:08:36,470
Instead of me?!
216
00:08:36,865 --> 00:08:38,065
Okay, I am almost on the verge
217
00:08:38,071 --> 00:08:40,189
of maybe blocking him on Xbox.
218
00:08:40,382 --> 00:08:43,592
Fine, I won't, just in
case he tries to message me.
219
00:08:44,353 --> 00:08:47,080
Please don't tell him I said that.
Seriously, I'll be your slave.
220
00:08:48,072 --> 00:08:51,471
Hey, Nathaniel, got any plans tonight?
221
00:08:51,936 --> 00:08:53,268
You know I don't.
222
00:08:53,274 --> 00:08:55,760
♪
223
00:08:55,766 --> 00:08:57,730
MAYA: So he went soft on you?
224
00:08:57,736 --> 00:08:59,753
This is the whole problem with bad boys.
225
00:08:59,759 --> 00:09:01,438
I mean, you... you
want them to get nicer,
226
00:09:01,444 --> 00:09:03,135
and then the second that they warm up,
227
00:09:03,141 --> 00:09:04,938
- it's game over.
- Oh, no.
228
00:09:04,944 --> 00:09:07,232
You're not taking dating
advice from this woman, are you?
229
00:09:07,238 --> 00:09:09,441
Gene, go get us more water.
230
00:09:09,447 --> 00:09:10,829
Lemme guess. Tap?
231
00:09:11,618 --> 00:09:14,332
I did not see this coming.
232
00:09:14,338 --> 00:09:16,926
Am I, like, a heartbreaker?
233
00:09:17,239 --> 00:09:20,142
Do I, like, ruin men?
234
00:09:20,821 --> 00:09:22,439
Does that guy want me?
235
00:09:24,544 --> 00:09:25,744
Possibly.
236
00:09:25,750 --> 00:09:28,545
I can't get into another
relationship right now.
237
00:09:28,551 --> 00:09:30,551
I have options to explore.
238
00:09:30,557 --> 00:09:32,652
That guy. Wes.
239
00:09:32,763 --> 00:09:34,848
Wes' girlfriend might
wanna do stuff with me...
240
00:09:34,854 --> 00:09:37,231
But, you're not worried
at all about torpedoing
241
00:09:37,237 --> 00:09:39,342
this brand-new business
partnership with Vlad?
242
00:09:39,348 --> 00:09:41,430
Why would it? You think he's
not gonna wanna work with me
243
00:09:41,436 --> 00:09:43,528
- if I don't reciprocate?
- I don't know.
244
00:09:43,534 --> 00:09:46,562
Guy caught feelings. Uh, who
knows how he's gonna react?
245
00:09:46,568 --> 00:09:48,936
Me, I'd burn it down. I'd burn
down everything you ever loved.
246
00:09:48,942 --> 00:09:52,202
[SCOFFS] Don't be silly, Gene!
You've never loved anything.
247
00:09:52,293 --> 00:09:54,605
Tell that to the movie "Dunkirk."
248
00:09:55,688 --> 00:09:58,209
I don't think Vlad would be
anything but professional.
249
00:09:58,215 --> 00:09:59,681
I'll just tell him.
250
00:10:01,697 --> 00:10:02,911
After our meeting.
251
00:10:02,917 --> 00:10:09,191
♪
252
00:10:09,197 --> 00:10:11,497
- Oh, honey, I'm home.
- [LAUGHS]
253
00:10:11,503 --> 00:10:12,703
Come on in.
254
00:10:12,709 --> 00:10:14,427
- [SMOOCHES]
- [PAIGE SIGHS]
255
00:10:14,896 --> 00:10:16,204
Wow!
256
00:10:16,904 --> 00:10:19,105
So, this is you?
257
00:10:19,111 --> 00:10:20,311
This is me.
258
00:10:20,317 --> 00:10:21,615
Mm.
259
00:10:23,097 --> 00:10:24,805
Oh...
260
00:10:24,811 --> 00:10:26,174
- There it is.
- Hmm.
261
00:10:26,180 --> 00:10:28,597
The quiet. Oh, I missed you, quiet.
262
00:10:28,603 --> 00:10:31,400
- It's nice, right? [BOTH CHUCKLE]
- Oh, my God, it's so nice.
263
00:10:31,405 --> 00:10:34,118
- I brought you some wine. You're welcome.
- Thank you. [CELLPHONE DINGS]
264
00:10:34,124 --> 00:10:36,423
My ex is dropping off my son soon.
265
00:10:36,429 --> 00:10:39,219
- Oh, so I get to meet your ex.
- Uh, no.
266
00:10:39,225 --> 00:10:41,644
He drops him off. He doesn't come in.
267
00:10:42,812 --> 00:10:45,184
Oh, you... you... you
guys... you don't speak?
268
00:10:45,190 --> 00:10:48,193
We do sometimes, just not
ever once in the past 12 years.
269
00:10:48,199 --> 00:10:50,700
- Oh.
- Sometimes, if I'm feeling nostalgic,
270
00:10:50,706 --> 00:10:52,286
I give him the finger
through the window.
271
00:10:52,292 --> 00:10:55,463
- Mm. [CHUCKLES] Good one.
- [DOOR OPENS]
272
00:10:55,469 --> 00:10:56,764
Hey, Mom.
273
00:10:57,229 --> 00:10:59,948
- Cool Hand Luke!
- Ah! Hey, buddy!
274
00:10:59,954 --> 00:11:02,667
Did you have a good day at sch... Whoa!
275
00:11:02,783 --> 00:11:04,087
He has a tattoo.
276
00:11:04,093 --> 00:11:06,571
- Yeah, it's his body.
- Is it?
277
00:11:06,577 --> 00:11:08,277
Dad said he needs me on
Thanksgiving this year.
278
00:11:08,283 --> 00:11:10,087
What? He had you last year.
279
00:11:10,093 --> 00:11:12,880
- He said you can have my birthday.
- Yeah! I'll bet he did.
280
00:11:12,886 --> 00:11:14,998
Tell him that he still has
to split the party with me.
281
00:11:15,004 --> 00:11:17,222
I will. Love you.
282
00:11:17,228 --> 00:11:18,745
Love you!
283
00:11:18,751 --> 00:11:19,951
Wow.
284
00:11:20,225 --> 00:11:22,525
So he's, like, self-sufficient.
285
00:11:22,531 --> 00:11:24,522
You say that like it's a bad thing...
286
00:11:25,175 --> 00:11:27,661
Oh, he just seems so mature.
287
00:11:27,667 --> 00:11:28,980
Thank you.
288
00:11:29,167 --> 00:11:33,191
- Hardened. Like a war vet...
- [CHUCKLES] Luke's doing great.
289
00:11:33,197 --> 00:11:35,091
- Don't worry.
- Yeah?
290
00:11:35,097 --> 00:11:37,294
What about you, hmm?
291
00:11:37,300 --> 00:11:39,693
You gonna spend Thanksgiving
all by yourself again?
292
00:11:39,699 --> 00:11:41,271
I eat with friends.
293
00:11:41,277 --> 00:11:44,574
I mean, we get loaded, we
go out for Brazilian buffet.
294
00:11:44,580 --> 00:11:46,871
- It's pretty awesome.
- Yeah.
295
00:11:46,877 --> 00:11:49,515
Look, my divorce works for me.
296
00:11:49,521 --> 00:11:51,001
I get the best of both worlds.
297
00:11:51,007 --> 00:11:54,124
I get one-on-one time with my son,
and then when he's with his dad,
298
00:11:54,130 --> 00:11:56,022
- I get plenty of time for myself.
- Mm.
299
00:11:56,028 --> 00:11:58,247
Hey, Mom, is it cool if I
sleep over at Matty's tonight?
300
00:11:58,421 --> 00:12:01,335
You've been gone all week!
She barely got to see you!
301
00:12:01,341 --> 00:12:02,934
It's fine.
302
00:12:03,233 --> 00:12:05,698
Arcade Fire, this
weekend... are we still on?
303
00:12:05,900 --> 00:12:07,714
- Still on.
- [CHUCKLES]
304
00:12:07,720 --> 00:12:10,004
Excuse me, mister. Are
you forgetting something?
305
00:12:10,010 --> 00:12:11,501
Oh, right.
306
00:12:13,782 --> 00:12:15,698
- Here's your check.
- Thank you.
307
00:12:15,704 --> 00:12:18,793
Oh, wait a minute, are
we chargin' this kid rent?
308
00:12:18,799 --> 00:12:20,624
Hmm? Because he's barely here.
309
00:12:20,630 --> 00:12:23,427
It's child support. From my dad.
310
00:12:23,513 --> 00:12:24,939
- ♪
- Oh.
311
00:12:24,945 --> 00:12:32,945
♪
312
00:12:32,951 --> 00:12:38,289
♪
313
00:12:38,295 --> 00:12:43,490
[CELLPHONE VIBRATING]
314
00:12:43,674 --> 00:12:45,717
- Oh, crap.
- [CELLPHONE CLICKS]
315
00:12:46,087 --> 00:12:48,403
Martin? Everything okay?
316
00:12:48,696 --> 00:12:50,307
MARTIN: Yeah, yeah, everything's okay.
317
00:12:50,313 --> 00:12:53,811
I, uh... I just wanted
to hear your voice.
318
00:12:53,817 --> 00:12:56,162
I-I mean, I just wanted to say...
319
00:12:56,566 --> 00:12:58,473
[CLEARS THROAT] You're a good mom.
320
00:12:58,655 --> 00:13:02,152
I... I just... I-I like the
kind of mom you are, is all.
321
00:13:02,158 --> 00:13:05,224
So, thank you... for being that way.
322
00:13:05,230 --> 00:13:08,013
- Are you dying?
- No, not yet. [CHUCKLES]
323
00:13:08,019 --> 00:13:09,632
But I did come home early.
324
00:13:09,638 --> 00:13:14,120
And, uh, I'm not gonna be going
out tonight after all, so...
325
00:13:14,835 --> 00:13:16,312
I'll see you when you get here?
326
00:13:16,318 --> 00:13:18,837
Uh, yeah, I'm just... I'm
just walking into a meeting,
327
00:13:18,843 --> 00:13:20,535
and I'll be home right after.
328
00:13:20,541 --> 00:13:23,927
Oh, cool, cool. Cool.
Yeah, I'm, uh... I'm here.
329
00:13:23,933 --> 00:13:27,027
Hey, uh, if you're interested,
there's some chili in the freezer.
330
00:13:27,314 --> 00:13:28,827
Thanks, yeah.
331
00:13:30,290 --> 00:13:31,701
I'm interested.
332
00:13:33,671 --> 00:13:37,585
I feel the story inside me,
clawing to get out, but...
333
00:13:38,389 --> 00:13:41,101
- I dunno how to open the door for it.
- Yeah.
334
00:13:41,279 --> 00:13:43,768
Maybe it shouldn't just be about a hill.
335
00:13:43,774 --> 00:13:45,886
What if you try putting
some people in there?
336
00:13:46,082 --> 00:13:47,282
Okay.
337
00:13:48,669 --> 00:13:51,287
See? It's already getting
better. You're amazing.
338
00:13:51,972 --> 00:13:54,196
Are you guys falling in love?
339
00:13:54,202 --> 00:13:56,468
Dude, don't you have
something you want to go do?
340
00:13:56,474 --> 00:13:58,275
Yes, I'm doing it.
341
00:13:58,668 --> 00:14:00,075
Just pretend he's not here.
342
00:14:00,081 --> 00:14:04,074
[SHRILL LAUGHTER IN DISTANCE]
343
00:14:04,080 --> 00:14:06,340
Is that your sister laughing?
344
00:14:06,346 --> 00:14:08,457
That's not my sister.
345
00:14:08,463 --> 00:14:10,363
[LAUGHING CONTINUES]
346
00:14:10,369 --> 00:14:12,569
[LAUGHS]
347
00:14:12,575 --> 00:14:13,963
You're pathetic, Mae.
348
00:14:14,147 --> 00:14:16,063
You seriously invited him over here
349
00:14:16,069 --> 00:14:17,764
just to get back at me for Bronwyn?
350
00:14:17,770 --> 00:14:18,857
We're hanging out, Mason.
351
00:14:18,863 --> 00:14:20,993
Ever heard of it? You
should try it sometime...
352
00:14:21,183 --> 00:14:23,465
- with me.
- You're obsessed with me.
353
00:14:23,471 --> 00:14:25,560
Your ego is out of control.
354
00:14:25,566 --> 00:14:27,589
Oh, then he and Bronwyn
are perfect for each other.
355
00:14:27,595 --> 00:14:29,863
- What'd I do?
- It's more of what you didn't do,
356
00:14:29,869 --> 00:14:32,044
which is co-author "Diary
of an Underpants Weirdo"!
357
00:14:32,050 --> 00:14:35,074
- It's inspired by me!
- [BOOK THUDS] Whoops!
358
00:14:35,080 --> 00:14:37,365
Just dropped the
instructions for my 500-piece
359
00:14:37,371 --> 00:14:39,958
special-anniversary
edition Justice League set.
360
00:14:40,218 --> 00:14:43,115
Milo, I'm never gonna play
Lego with you. Just give it up.
361
00:14:43,121 --> 00:14:45,103
Same, dude! Same!
362
00:14:45,109 --> 00:14:47,002
All right, you're ridiculous, huh?
363
00:14:47,008 --> 00:14:49,610
- Let's just put that as a fact. Yes!
- I'm being ridiculous? You invited him over here
364
00:14:49,616 --> 00:14:51,617
- just because I invited her over here.
- Can we just agree that everybody here is being ridiculous?
365
00:14:51,623 --> 00:14:54,226
- You invited Bronwyn, okay?
- Why can't you... guys just quit it?
366
00:14:54,232 --> 00:14:57,013
- ...because it's classic and traditional, okay?
- I'm the one who's not getting...
367
00:14:57,019 --> 00:14:58,896
♪
368
00:14:58,902 --> 00:15:01,082
[ECHOING] Hellew, hellew?
369
00:15:01,088 --> 00:15:02,395
There! You heard it?
370
00:15:02,401 --> 00:15:03,776
Hellew...
371
00:15:03,782 --> 00:15:06,184
- There's an echo.
- Hello.
372
00:15:06,190 --> 00:15:09,684
No, no. It's hellew, hellew...
373
00:15:09,690 --> 00:15:11,575
Okay, wait just a second.
If you stop doing it...
374
00:15:11,581 --> 00:15:14,102
If I stop doing it, you won't hear it.
375
00:15:14,108 --> 00:15:15,679
- Right!
- [SIGHS]
376
00:15:15,879 --> 00:15:17,576
The client's always right.
377
00:15:18,278 --> 00:15:19,483
How about this.
378
00:15:19,489 --> 00:15:21,387
We bring in some textiles,
379
00:15:21,393 --> 00:15:23,787
all in keeping with your Grecian motif.
380
00:15:23,793 --> 00:15:27,475
Maybe some key pattern
rugs, wall tapestries,
381
00:15:27,481 --> 00:15:31,303
silk window treatments, all
very regal, all very grand,
382
00:15:31,309 --> 00:15:34,193
all of which will
absorb the "hellews"...
383
00:15:34,199 --> 00:15:35,399
So cute.
384
00:15:38,012 --> 00:15:41,619
I'm sorry. You're just... so cute.
385
00:15:41,937 --> 00:15:43,137
[CHUCKLES]
386
00:15:43,851 --> 00:15:46,245
I would also love to incorporate
387
00:15:46,251 --> 00:15:48,018
some oversized light fixtures
388
00:15:48,024 --> 00:15:51,323
just to accentuate the
grandeur of the space.
389
00:15:51,329 --> 00:15:54,034
She's just so cute, right?
390
00:15:54,040 --> 00:15:55,419
You know, when I first met her,
391
00:15:55,425 --> 00:15:57,725
even the sound of her voice was grating.
392
00:15:57,731 --> 00:15:59,136
But now, it's like...
393
00:15:59,142 --> 00:16:01,753
[SIGHS]
394
00:16:02,126 --> 00:16:03,933
I just can't get enough.
395
00:16:03,939 --> 00:16:06,986
Vlad, this is not the image
that we want to project.
396
00:16:06,992 --> 00:16:12,003
What do you mean? A sexy couple
that makes houses and love?
397
00:16:12,099 --> 00:16:14,072
That's everybody's dream, no?
398
00:16:14,078 --> 00:16:17,326
And maybe even possibly
a basic cable show.
399
00:16:18,708 --> 00:16:20,090
Look at her face, huh?
400
00:16:20,096 --> 00:16:21,397
She's in.
401
00:16:21,403 --> 00:16:24,981
♪
402
00:16:24,987 --> 00:16:26,891
- [KIDS YELLING OVER EACH OTHER]
- MARTIN: Come on. One at a time.
403
00:16:26,897 --> 00:16:30,563
One at a time. One at a time. Mason!
404
00:16:30,790 --> 00:16:33,174
Listen to me! It should
matter when I yell!
405
00:16:33,180 --> 00:16:34,940
It should matter when I yell!!
406
00:16:34,946 --> 00:16:36,940
How come none of you
are listening to me?!
407
00:16:36,946 --> 00:16:38,649
- It should matter when...
- Kids!
408
00:16:39,841 --> 00:16:41,439
Thank God you're home.
409
00:16:41,631 --> 00:16:43,259
Everyone take a deep breath.
410
00:16:43,265 --> 00:16:46,836
[EVERYONE BREATHES DEEPLY]
411
00:16:47,226 --> 00:16:49,431
Okay, we're going to sit down
412
00:16:49,437 --> 00:16:51,240
and discuss this calmly
413
00:16:51,246 --> 00:16:52,607
over some instant cocoa.
414
00:16:52,724 --> 00:16:53,936
Who wants marshmallows?
415
00:16:53,942 --> 00:16:55,242
MARTIN: [EXCITEDLY]
Marshmallows, please!
416
00:16:56,124 --> 00:16:57,626
[COOLLY] Marshmallows.
417
00:16:59,509 --> 00:17:00,709
Mae,
418
00:17:00,715 --> 00:17:05,149
I understand that you
think Bronwyn can be a lot,
419
00:17:05,155 --> 00:17:07,452
but here's the thing... so can you.
420
00:17:07,569 --> 00:17:09,225
You two have a lot in common.
421
00:17:09,231 --> 00:17:11,170
She and Mason are gonna be hanging out,
422
00:17:11,176 --> 00:17:12,854
so try to be accepting.
423
00:17:12,860 --> 00:17:15,235
And, Mason, if you don't want
to hang out with Nathaniel,
424
00:17:15,241 --> 00:17:16,647
you gotta be up front with him.
425
00:17:16,653 --> 00:17:19,031
I don't want to hang out with you.
426
00:17:19,132 --> 00:17:22,021
And, Nathaniel, you need
to stop being so thirsty.
427
00:17:22,027 --> 00:17:23,760
It's not helping the cause, buddy.
428
00:17:23,766 --> 00:17:25,054
I'll be friends with you!
429
00:17:25,060 --> 00:17:28,405
Milo, what did your father
just say about being thirsty?
430
00:17:28,411 --> 00:17:32,196
Relationships only work if
both people are into them.
431
00:17:32,278 --> 00:17:35,777
Okay, If one isn't, it doesn't
matter how much the other one is.
432
00:17:35,783 --> 00:17:37,496
Where are you on Ninjago?
433
00:17:37,502 --> 00:17:39,604
I'd say I'm Ninjago-curious.
434
00:17:40,220 --> 00:17:42,040
- We'll talk.
- Yes!
435
00:17:42,046 --> 00:17:44,526
- Well, there you go! Everyone good?
- Yeah.
436
00:17:44,532 --> 00:17:46,040
- I guess.
- Okay, good.
437
00:17:46,046 --> 00:17:47,626
- Meeting adjourned.
- Okay. Get up, let's go.
438
00:17:48,208 --> 00:17:49,411
[EXHALES]
439
00:17:49,417 --> 00:17:51,303
[MARTIN CHUCKLES]
440
00:17:51,309 --> 00:17:52,616
[LENA SIGHS]
441
00:17:52,622 --> 00:17:55,411
- What are you gonna do? We're messy.
- Yeah.
442
00:17:55,586 --> 00:17:57,108
You know what?
443
00:17:57,690 --> 00:17:58,915
I don't mind.
444
00:17:59,309 --> 00:18:01,505
I'll take it over the
alternative any day.
445
00:18:01,511 --> 00:18:03,301
- Really?
- Really!
446
00:18:03,982 --> 00:18:06,085
I think we're doing
something right, here.
447
00:18:06,380 --> 00:18:09,489
I can't imagine not being
able to see the kids every day
448
00:18:09,998 --> 00:18:13,600
or not being able to talk to
you just because we aren't...
449
00:18:13,968 --> 00:18:17,202
So are you saying you don't
want to sell the house anymore?
450
00:18:17,405 --> 00:18:20,306
I'm saying that I can't
imagine being divorced
451
00:18:20,312 --> 00:18:21,898
without you guys.
452
00:18:22,777 --> 00:18:25,899
- [LAUGHS]
- [SCREAMS]
453
00:18:25,905 --> 00:18:27,572
[CONTINUES LAUGHING]
454
00:18:27,882 --> 00:18:29,589
Well, in that case...
455
00:18:29,595 --> 00:18:31,679
I'm gonna fire our contractor.
456
00:18:32,483 --> 00:18:34,097
You are? Over what?
457
00:18:34,103 --> 00:18:35,408
He fell for me.
458
00:18:35,414 --> 00:18:37,004
Vlad? Stop it.
459
00:18:37,010 --> 00:18:38,598
He fell hard, bro.
460
00:18:38,604 --> 00:18:40,315
Wait, you're... you're kidding.
461
00:18:40,588 --> 00:18:43,213
You're kidding. You're not kidding?
462
00:18:43,219 --> 00:18:46,305
I'm a man-eater! What can I say?
463
00:18:46,311 --> 00:18:49,215
Uh, what's gonna happen to
your joint business venture?
464
00:18:49,221 --> 00:18:53,602
Well, based on how
intoxicating my flesh is,
465
00:18:53,608 --> 00:18:55,424
I don't think he can work with me.
466
00:18:55,430 --> 00:18:57,830
I mean, I don't think he can
be in the same vicinity as me.
467
00:18:57,836 --> 00:19:00,533
- Okay, wait a minute.
- So, I'm just gonna have to go at it solo.
468
00:19:00,539 --> 00:19:02,228
Wait a minute. I-I...
We-we-we need to get
469
00:19:02,234 --> 00:19:04,830
another packet of hot chocolate
to talk about this. Come on.
470
00:19:05,476 --> 00:19:06,961
Did you guys kiss?
471
00:19:06,967 --> 00:19:08,874
- Oh, yeah.
- You did?!
472
00:19:08,880 --> 00:19:11,189
- And he's not gonna easily forget me.
- Ugh!
473
00:19:11,195 --> 00:19:13,085
- That's all I'm saying.
- Disgusting.
474
00:19:13,091 --> 00:19:14,562
Did you make love to him?
475
00:19:18,472 --> 00:19:21,486
- VLAD: I owe you an apology.
- Oh! Dude!
476
00:19:21,492 --> 00:19:22,970
You scared me.
477
00:19:23,182 --> 00:19:25,694
Yeah, well, I scared myself.
478
00:19:25,700 --> 00:19:27,088
Very unlike me.
479
00:19:28,599 --> 00:19:30,202
Fell for your ex-wife.
480
00:19:30,208 --> 00:19:31,477
She told you?
481
00:19:31,483 --> 00:19:33,273
She mentioned something, yeah.
482
00:19:33,279 --> 00:19:34,975
Well, she just broke it off.
483
00:19:35,075 --> 00:19:37,689
Me working for you, her working
with me. The whole thing.
484
00:19:38,794 --> 00:19:41,799
- [CLICKS MOUTH] Women... [SIGHS]
- Ah, yeah, women.
485
00:19:43,591 --> 00:19:45,201
Do you, um...
486
00:19:45,504 --> 00:19:48,207
Do you think you can put
in a good word for me?
487
00:19:48,393 --> 00:19:49,876
That's a weird ask.
488
00:19:49,882 --> 00:19:53,857
- I'll give you this necklace in return.
- No, uh... Vlad, that's really...
489
00:19:55,337 --> 00:19:57,971
Whoa! That is badass.
490
00:19:58,251 --> 00:20:00,745
- I mean, is the chain the snake?
- Yep.
491
00:20:00,751 --> 00:20:02,554
Why is this thing not on me right now?
492
00:20:02,560 --> 00:20:04,191
Huh? [CHUCKLES]
493
00:20:08,754 --> 00:20:11,060
Nope, it's too weird.
494
00:20:11,066 --> 00:20:12,357
Sorry.
495
00:20:13,271 --> 00:20:14,495
Well...
496
00:20:15,281 --> 00:20:17,399
I gave it my best necklace.
497
00:20:17,678 --> 00:20:19,072
Don't know what else I can do.
498
00:20:19,078 --> 00:20:21,883
Nothing, Vlad, there's
nothing you can do.
499
00:20:21,889 --> 00:20:24,713
Okay? And trust me, it's a good thing.
500
00:20:24,719 --> 00:20:28,261
I mean, l-l-look at me,
sucked in, can't get out.
501
00:20:28,267 --> 00:20:29,573
Firmly under her thumb.
502
00:20:29,579 --> 00:20:31,253
And yet you are smiling.
503
00:20:31,259 --> 00:20:34,143
[SCOFFS] It's like Stockholm Syndrome.
504
00:20:34,549 --> 00:20:35,753
I hate Stockholm.
505
00:20:35,759 --> 00:20:37,044
Exactly.
506
00:20:37,259 --> 00:20:38,569
Be free.
507
00:20:38,575 --> 00:20:40,853
Go live your life, man.
508
00:20:41,524 --> 00:20:49,524
♪
509
00:20:49,727 --> 00:20:51,313
50 bucks for the necklace?
510
00:20:52,132 --> 00:20:54,298
Okay don't move, I'm
gonna get my wallet.
511
00:20:54,304 --> 00:20:57,696
- ♪
- Sync/Corrections PetaG - addic7ed.com -
512
00:20:57,702 --> 00:21:00,635
ANNOUNCER: What's in store for
Lena and Martin in the new year?
513
00:21:00,641 --> 00:21:04,889
Find out when Splitting Up
Together returns, January, 8th.
37549
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