All language subtitles for Such.Brave.Girls.S02E03.720p.HEVC.x265-MeGusta.en

Honestly, girls, Dev's fine.

He'll be back in the office on Monday.

Are you sure? He seemed
quite serious about quitting.

It's just a funny turn.
You know all about those, Josie.

Bloody hell. It's like
the pot sectioning the kettle.

It's a midlife crisis. Stinks of it.

Trust me. We are one step closer
to that massive house.

I guarantee it.

[screams]

[♪ bright, upbeat music playing]

[floorboard creaks]

Morning, Mummy. We love you.

Please... eat something.

Raw.

Well, sorry if I don't know
how to boil a fucking egg.

You can't fucking see inside them.
I'm not a fucking magician.

Now, Mum, I've googled your symptoms,

and you either have
terminal cancer or anxiety.

What?

Aren't you their spokesperson?

There's no shame in anxiety!
I'm anxious all the time!

But do I let that stop me?

Yes, constantly.

You wish it was anxiety.
You'd love that, wouldn't you?

Well, sorry to disappoint you.
I'm not anxious.

I'm just very, very tired.

Well, if you're not anxious,
why can't you eat?

I'm not hungry.

-Because you're anxious.
-No. It's acid reflux.

I haven't had this much stomach pain
since I thought you were a miscarriage.

That'll teach me to get my hopes up.

And it's nothing to do with all the boxes
and Dev's dead wife's stuff everywhere?

-No.
-What about the fact

he decided his house
is too big for one man

and he'd rather move in with us?

Enough.

I just want to have
a relaxing bath in peace.

You fixed the hole, didn't you?

Absolutely. Good as new.

What the fuck do we do?

We run a bath and hope she doesn't notice.

[Josie sighs]

[water running]

Can't we just pay someone to fix it?

With what fucking money, Billie?

I'm a sugar baby now.

Oh. How much is he paying you?

Well, nothing yet.

And have you been having sex?

No.

So, business is booming.

Thinking about it,
we haven't actually spoken

since he agreed to be my sugar daddy.

Mm. You have such bad luck with daddies.

The problem is, I can't get him away
from his stupid wife.

He's taking her out
for cream tea tomorrow.

-What's cream tea?
-[Josie] Yeah. I don't know,

but it must be really good
'cause it's all posh people eat.

Wow. Sounds fancy.

Maybe I should go, see him in person.

Remind him of his responsibilities
as my sugar daddy.

Maybe he's afraid to make
the first move. He's quite shy.

Girls...

Deb seems quite tired, doesn't she?

-She's anxious.
-What about?

The house is a bit cramped. All the boxes.

Oh, gosh. Oh, right, okay.

Strange. I hadn't noticed.

It doesn't seem cramped to me at all.

[Seb] I hadn't noticed either.

-So, tomorrow, what's the plan?
-What's tomorrow?

-It's Mother's Day.
-That's not a thing.

Yes, it is.

N-No, it's only a thing in America.

No, I think it's here as well.

It's a chance to show her
you appreciate her.

Mum knows we appreciate her.

[Deb] Can one of you bring in my glasses?

Are your legs fucking broken?

Sorry. That was Josie.

[Josie] I don't think
she would enjoy Mother's Day.

She prefer to think of herself
as a straight-talking older sister.

I was thinking cream tea.
You could treat her.

Good idea. Two birds, one stone.

Excellent. Deb will be so happy.

-[lock clicks]
-He's such a nonce.

You can't call people a nonce
just 'cause they're annoying.

You can if they're a nonce.

Mum's not tired. She's anxious.

We're trapped in this
fucking hellhole of a house.

Yeah, well,
unless you get sectioned again,

you're fucking stuck here.

-There's no escape.
-Are you running a bath?

Can you save me the water?

Fuck off, Seb! You know
I'm third in the rotation!

[Seb] But yesterday you said...

There. Fixed.

[Deb] It's bath time!

Why is this door locked?

Locked doors are illegal.

It's all yours.

[door slams]

[sighs] Wonderful.

[Deb screams]

Yum, yum, yum. Cream tea.

How wonderful to be
celebrating Mother's Day,

and all to show Deb
how much we appreciate her.

Can't wait to feast on...

Wait.

This menu's only like stupid
little sandwiches and stuff.

Where are all the mains?

Billie, that's what a cream tea is.

As much egg and watercress
as you can manage. It's amazing.

Plants and bread. A revelation.

Well, eat whatever horrible
old shit you like. It's on me.

Is Deb really worried about the boxes?

Are you sure she's not
just really, really tired?

A sleepy lady.

Probably worried you're going to leave.
Their dad left.

You need to keep reminding them
that you're going to stick around.

That's what I do.

Look at Josie now. Thriving.

Weird. Really thought she was there.

Yes, um, so sorry.

I've taken an absolutely
bloody massive overdose,

and I need to be sectioned.

[♪ upbeat music playing]

Just a fizzy water for me.

Does anyone know where my wife is?

She's at the hospital.

What for?

Women's issues.

Again?

Wow. [chuckling]

I mean, wow. This is crazy.

I've gotta go.

Be right back.

[nurse] Alright. You've got to have this.

It might make you feel sick,
but it'll flush your system.

How many pills did you take?

A lady never tells.

-We need to know.
-Trust me. Enough.

I just need you to section me, okay?

Why?

Because I loved it.

Regular meal times, lights out.

Very clear set of rules to adhere to.

Strawberry jam in a tiny foil packet.

A buxom, motherly nurse
to play giant chess with.

It was amazing. Please keep me in.

Mother me.

I can't do anything until you tell me
how many pills you took.

Be honest. You can tell me.

We don't judge. We're here to help you.

How many pills did you take?

Two.

And I would've taken more. I was starting
to worry it was a bit dangerous.

[♪ upbeat music playing]

Did they let you out already?

Didn't get in. Too many marbles,
not enough pills.

So, you're going to do everyone a favor
and just kill yourself then?

-Nah, I'm going to go private.
-That sounds expensive.

Which is great 'cause I've got
a job for you.

Graham's over there
with his stupid, ugly wife.

I need you to take care of her.

-What? Kill her?
-No, distract her.

There's money in it for you.
Rock hard cash.

Sugar babies can make a fuck ton of money.
I'll give you a cut.

Hello, business class sectioning.

Premium breakdown with no expense spared.

I'm just not sure I'm very comfortable
being your pimp.

Not pimp. A business manager.

Do whatever you need to do to manage me
fucking that old man for money.

-His wife looks nice.
-Trust me. She's a geriatric old crone

and a pain in my arse.

Right, there's Mr. Daddy.

Showtime.

And you can kill her if you have to.

At her age, it's the kindest thing to do.

[Deb] So, Dev,

obviously as much as I love
all your stuff being in the house,

I was just wondering if you got
any closer to working out

what you'd like to do with your life.

You know, every day I get a bit closer,

but the main thing is
I'm not going anywhere.

I'm staying by your side forever.

Nothing to eat?

No, thanks. Not hungry.

No wonder you're so tired.
You've got no energy.

Food equals energy. So...

Please?

For me.

Now... swallow.

There you go.

I'm proud of you.

Not so sleepy anymore, are you?

[♪ bright music playing]

Miss me, stranger?

Billie, what the hell are you doing?
My wife is here.

Please. I told you I don't want
to be your sugar daddy,

and you're not my sugar baby.

Poor man. Still in denial.

If you want VIP access
to the Perfect Pussy Club,

it comes at a price.

I gave you money outside my house
to get you to leave.

I get it.

You're scared.

Scared of being with a real woman.

Scared of getting everything
you've ever wanted.

I'm scared of my wife finding out.

This whole affair was a mistake.

Perhaps you need a reminder
of what you've been missing out on.

No. Thank you.

Well, how am I supposed to make any money

if you're too much of a wuss
to let me fuck you?

Look, um, if you need money,
here's everything I've got.

It's all in pound coins. Sorry.

I-I-I like to have spares
for the big shop trolley.

Please leave me alone.

Twelve pounds?

Fucking hell.

Alright.

I'll suck you off,
but I won't cover my teeth.

Billie, no...

Sorry. Do you know
where all the mains are?

'Cause this is all stupid
little sandwiches and shit.

That's what an afternoon tea is,
sweetheart.

It's all egg and cress and hummus
and roasted vegetables.

Mm, yummy.

[Pauline] Are you alright, dear?
You look a bit unwell.

Yeah, I don't feel very well, actually.

Oh, dear. Do you think
you should perhaps sit down?

[Josie retching]

[Billie] Daddy, wait. This one's for free.

What are you looking at?

Yeah, alright. He's old,
but he's really grateful.

So stop being so fucking
close-minded, okay?

He's my dad.

[Josie retching]

Oh, poor love.

You're not very well, are you?

No, I'm not, actually.

Can I get you something?
How about a paracetamol?

Oh, no, thanks. I've had enough.

-I'm sorry about all this.
-Oh, that's alright.

I'm a doctor.

What kind of doctor?

A neurosurgeon.

You fix people's brains.

[chuckles] You could say that. Yes.

[Josie sighs]

Do you have anyone you want me
to call or anything?

Are you here with your mum?

Yeah. Why?

Should I go and get her?
She's probably worried.

[laughs] You're funny.

Every girl needs her mother.

Well, um...

I better get back to my table.

My daughter's waiting.

[door creaks]

Right. Now I've taken a bite.

Seems only fair
you should go back to work.

Nope. I'm the happiest I've ever been.

The corporate rat race is not for me.

The old Dev is dead.
I buried him. [chuckles]

And I don't know about you,
but I kind of like this guy.

Well, I like the old Dev.

Well, too bad because he's dead. [laughs]

Listen to me.

I am not going anywhere.

Even if I never make any money again,

I am staying by your side.

You're stuck with me.

Happy Mother's Day.

-She's not your mother.
-I'd be lucky if she was.

So, you want to fuck your mother?

If she were Deb, absolutely.

A wonderful mother.

Josie, you look like dog shit.

I don't feel very well.

I didn't ask for your fucking life story.

-How did it go?
-Business is booming.

There was a small snag, though,
but I've sorted it.

Small snag?

His daughter saw.

Oh. Oh, that's fine.

How old is she?
Probably doesn't even know what sex is.

Yeah, hard to tell with kids.
Maybe like six.

She'll be happy for me.

Desperate for a new mummy
given her one's doing the crossword

in God's waiting room.

Nobody believes little kids anyway.

Yeah. I did have to give her
a little bribe, though.

Billie, as your manager,
I really feel like

I should be consulted on things like this.

It's just business. It's sorted.

And now I can go back to the business
of fucking her dad.

A word?

Lucy, please. I'm with my family.

Now.

-More.
-Please be reasonable, Lucy.

What did she give you?
Like a kinder egg or something?

You're not having any more
of my fucking coke.

Billie, did you give cocaine
to a 6-year-old?

-I'm 15.
-Me too.

Yeah, you wish. Give me my fucking coke!

Lucy, no, we shook on it.
You've got such a tiny nose.

You can't cut me off. You owe me big time.

Oh, are you going to tell
your mum? I'm so scared.

You want your parents to divorce, do you?

Yep. Can't wait for them to split up.

I hate my dad,

and my mum's a fucking wet old lady
with no backbone.

Don't speak about her like that!

She's a highly respected neurosurgeon!

Who the fuck are you? You look insane.

Yeah, well, joke's on you,

'cause I've tried to kill myself twice.

So, I bet you feel bad now.

Yeah. I feel bad that
you're not very good at killing yourself.

Why do you need a sugar daddy anyway?

Not got a real daddy at home?

I do, and he'll reply
to my texts when he's ready.

-He's still thinking about what to say.
-[Lucy scoffs]

Billie, a moment to confer?

-I think we should let her tell them.
-What?

Think about it. Why are we
protecting this family?

Don't you want Graham to yourself?

If they split up,
you know he's going to pick you.

You're right. I would
have Graham to myself.

He'd have more money for me,
and he'll spend less

on that 6-year-old kraken out there
and his stupid ugly wife.

Yeah, his stupid lovely wife.

My client has a request for you.

Ask your dad how my pussy tastes.

[♪ upbeat music playing]

That bitch has no idea

how much of a crusty old cockblock she is.

She's not that bad.

You fancy her. You're wet
for a frigid old neurosurgeon.

My business is at stake.

But I love her.

Trust you to fall in love

with the first mother figure
who pays you any attention.

Pathetic. Why can't you pick
on someone your own age?

Hello, Mr. Daddy.

Girls, if there is one piece
of advice I can give you,

it's value your independence.

You do not want to end up
with a man like Dev

sucking me dry.

Well, that's why it was my idea
to take you out for cream tea.

I love you so much, Mum.

What are you actually doing
for a new job, again?

Um, she's an assistant to an old man.

Bloody hell. He must be paying you well.

-What does he do?
-He's a house husband.

Neglected by his wife.
She's a neurosurgeon.

Hasn't got time to look after him.

Uh, well, there's two sides
to every story.

Yet another man scrounging off his wife.

Treat the wife well. That's what I say.

If that wife was brave enough,
she'd cut him the fuck loose.

Then what would he do, hmm?

Kiss all that lovely cash goodbye.

It's his wife's money.

There we go.

Hopefully, that's balanced the accounts.

And the rest?

I just really don't feel comfortable
giving that much cocaine to a child.

Daddy?

[both thudding]

[both grunting]

Fuck's sake, Josie! Just give it to her!

There we go. That was easy, wasn't it?

Enjoy your fucking coke.

Enjoy fucking my dad.

[♪ upbeat music playing]

Wow. For me?

Nope. I'd like to make
a little announcement.

It may be Mother's Day,
but it's also Father's Day

because we're pregnant.

[chuckles] We didn't want
to tell anyone too early.

In fact, I haven't even talked
to Josie about it yet,

but I'm just too excited.

I'm going to be a daddy.

Get in there, my son!

-Josie's not pregnant.
-Trust me, she is.

Mood swings, nausea every night
whenever I'm in the mood.

She's been in the hospital
with women's issues.

-She's pregnant.
-No, she's not.

You'd have to be having sex
to get pregnant.

Well, if those sex noises
aren't coming from Josie's room,

whose room could they be coming from?

Yeah, no clue. Maybe she is.

Well, where is she?
You two have hardly fucking been here.

She's in the toilet. She's just been sick.

Yeah. Morning sickness.

I bet she's all sweaty and agitated too.

A classic pregnant woman.

You've not touched your food, Deb.

I'll finish it.
I'm eating for two now, anyway.

Where will you live?

I was hoping we'd live with you.

There's enough room
for a little one, isn't there?

I should hope so.

We'll have a cozy little commune of love.

Where the fuck will a baby go?
In one of Dev's boxes?

Don't be silly. They've got my records in.

I'm going to teach 'em how to play catch.

Obviously, I have to learn
how to do that myself,

but got a nine-month head start
on the little bugger.

[Seb and Dev laugh]

Who's going to cook and clean up after it?

Well, it's just dinner.
How hard can throwing

a couple more chicky nugs
on the baking tray be?

He's not having my fucking chicky nugs.

I'm saying we put more on the tray.

We already finished the bag.
We'd have to buy another bag.

Who's paying for that, Seb?
You haven't thought this through at all.

Dev, it's just occurring to me right now.

I'm just thinking about
your big empty house.

Yes. There's no takers yet.

-Well, you know, until there is...
-Oh, I'm never setting foot in it again.

It's massive. Impractical.

Besides, it wouldn't be
respectful to Lisa.

Or to you. Now I've made up my mind.

Deb, I promise you

we're never going
in that house ever again.

The end.

[Deb gasping]

What's going on?

Is she alright?

Alright then. I will tell you.

I've got anxiety, okay? It's anxiety.

Oh, darling. There's nothing
to be a bit worried about.

I'm not just tired. It's fucking anxiety.

I've got so much fucking anxiety
I can't eat.

Wow, you've shocked me there.
Are you sure?

See-See, as an empath,

I'm usually so good
at picking up on these things.

-Wow. I'm an empath too.
-And me.

Look at us. Table full of empaths.

So much empathy at this table,
I could explode.

[all laugh]

It's amazing none of us
have picked up on the fact

that we're all empaths,
considering we're all empaths.

Ah, we're saying
the word "empath" so much,

it's like it's lost all meaning.

-[laughs]
-[slap smacks]

Listen to me, Mum.
Don't let Josie get in your head.

You haven't got anxiety.
You're just tired.

Yes. Alright. Yes.

I haven't got anxiety.

I'm just a tired, sleepy lady.

Thank you, Billie.

Happy Mother's Day.

[Josie] Look, you're, obviously, gay
and-and trapped in a loveless marriage.

We already have so much in common.

-We could be free.
-I was helping you

because you were unwell and I'm a doctor.

So, you don't want to be
my, um... sugar mummy?

-No, thank you.
-[Josie] Okay.

What would it take for you
to be my actual mother?

I'm not your mother.

How many pills do I need to take

for someone to care about me?

-You don't want to do that.
-Just say when.

-One?
-No.

Two?

Spit out those fucking pills.

[Pauline] This girl's having
a mental health crisis.

Don't worry about it.
She never takes more than two.

All talk and no trousers.

Please, can you help me find her mother?

I am her mother.

Well, can you help her then?

Don't fall for it.
She just wants attention.

Honestly, kids. Get out.

She was the love of my life. [sobs]

[slap smacks]

-Get over yourself!
-Thank you.

Now tell me. Are you pregnant?

What? No.

Where the fuck have you been then?

I was in hospital.
I tried to get sectioned.

Oh, my fucking God.

Yes! Not pregnant! [laughs]

I have never been so proud of you.

She was a neurosurgeon.

She was going to fix my brain.

Oh, darling.

That would take much more than surgery.

Fantastic news, everyone.

She's not pregnant.
She was just depressed.

[Dev] Wow.

You'd think this room full of empaths

would've picked up on that.

What a day of curveballs.

Come on, mate.
Don't let them see you crying.

It's not manly.

And now I can eat.

I've never felt relief
like this in my whole life.

Delicious. [chuckles]

Well, dinner's on Graham. Where's my cut?

One, two.

Yeah, sorry. It's all in pound coins.

His wife only lets him carry small change.

Two pounds?

Yeah, that feels fair.
He gave me 12 pounds.

Sorry. He gave you 12 pounds
to suck him off?

That was all the cash he had on him.

Right, that's it. I'm running
a fucking business here.

-Excuse me...
-Did you ask your dad how my pussy tastes?

That man owes us fucking money.

Oh, for goodness sake, Graham.

Do you think my sister's blowjobs
are only worth 12 pounds?

Alright, calm down.

We are working through
Graham's sex addiction together.

-What?
-[Pauline] Marriage has its difficulties,

but we are a family and we stick together.

Well, I quit. You're no longer
my sugar daddy. It's over.

I never was your sugar daddy.

So, why the fuck was I sucking you off
at cream tea then?

-I did ask you to stop.
-Yeah, well, he's a nonce. I'm 15.

-Mm. No, you're not.
-I could be.

[Pauline] Well, when were you born?

Well, I'm younger than you,
you dry, old fossil.

How much would it cost for you
to never speak to us again?

One, two, five million pounds.

-I have a 20.
-[Josie] Thank you.

[Billie] You pensioners
deserve each other.

Enjoy the last few years
you have left. See ya.

Unless you fuck girls?

No? Okay then.

[♪ bright music playing]

Happy Mother's Day.

[Deb sighs]

[both] Yes!

Business is booming. Suck my dick, NHS.

Hello, private room
with Diazepam in the mini bar.

Sorry, I need this.

You have no idea how expensive cocaine is.

How did you get that much anyway?

A lady never tells.

[door slams]

Well, did your mum say I could stay?

I'm working on it, Nicky.

Took her out for cream tea today,
buttering her up.

Crack on, love.
I'm living off your fucking vapes in here.

Trust me. I'm being so nice to her.

[Deb] Billie, can you help me?

I've dropped one of my crutches
down the stairs.

Get it yourself! It's only a sprain!

So nice.

Okay, uh, but h-how many
do I need to take to get in?

Are we talking double figures?

I think we could do it, you know?

Not a lot of things
in this life are for sure,

but it's you and me.

I love you more than anything.

And if I can make something
as perfect as you,

well, baby, I'd be selling
my sperm on the black market.

This could be something
for us to live for.

We could start a new life.

Away from here?

Anything you want.

Okay then.

[Seb chuckles]

Seriously?

[laughs]

Oh, my God.

[Dev] Deb, I know
you've been worrying about space

and I've really heard you.

Are we moving into your house?

-[Dev] Even better.
-[Deb laughs]

There's something I wanted to show you.

You've been so very tired lately, Deb,

and we all need a break.

And this has been in storage since...

Well, anyway. [chuckles]

I think it's time we brought her back.

Here she is. [laughs]

Isn't she lovely?

Fucking hell.

He's gone insane.

The man's dumped
a midlife crisis on our driveway.

I told you. He's a nonce.

-[Seb grunts]
-Heavy?

-[laughs]
-That's heavy.

So, would you maybe think about seeing

a doctor for your anxiety?

Listen, I don't have anxiety.

It's a big fuss over nothing.
It's all about perspective.

I mean, yes, it is a boat,

but at least it's not a fucking baby.

All this time, I've been thinking

things cannot get any worse.

That's not true.
Things could always be worse.

Things could always be worse.

I knew you'd love it, Deb.
Because I'm such an empath.

I know what makes you happy. [laughs]

[♪ upbeat music playing]

[♪ "Laissez Faire"
by Michel Lepop playing]