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"The Adventures of Ozzie
and Harriet," starring
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the entire Nelson family.
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Here's Ozzie.
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Here's Harriet.
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Here's David.
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Here's Rick.
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Here they are, America's
favorite family, the Nelsons.
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What are you looking for?
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Uh, do we have any
scissors around here?
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Yeah, right over here.
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- Thanks.
- What's this?
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You're doing your
Christmas wrapping a little
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early this year?
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No, it's just a
little gag for Joe.
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He's going on a
business trip, so I'm
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going to give him this
fishing fly, this note here,
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"be sure and catch
some big ones."
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Oh.
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That poor guy, isn't that
rubbing it in a little?
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00:00:55,490 --> 00:00:57,144
Well, no.
He'll get a big kick out of it.
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Besides, it's about
time I returned this.
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I borrowed it from
him about a year ago.
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Oh, hi, Ozzie!
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Come on in.
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Thanks.
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Joe didn't leave yet, did he?
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No, he just went
down to the drugstore.
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He'll be back in a few minutes.
Oh, good.
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I-- I got him a little
gift, just kind of a gag.
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Well, he needs a good laugh.
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It looks like he's going to
be gone two or three days.
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Yeah, that's a shame.
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I know how he hates
these business trips.
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What did you get him?
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Uh, well, why don't
you read the card first?
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"Be sure and catch
some big ones."
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I hope it's not perfume.
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That would've
been even funnier.
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Not to me it wouldn't.
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What'd did you get him?
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Oh, it's just a fishing fly.
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A fishing fly?
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Well, he told me he was
going on a business trip.
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Yeah, that's right.
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He is.
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Well, why would he take a
fishing fly on a business trip?
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Well, he's not taking--
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I'm giving it to him as a gag.
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You see, he's going on a
business trip, which he hates.
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So I'm giving him this fishing
fly to sort of tease him.
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Because he'd much
rather be going fishing.
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But instead, he's going on a
business trip, which he hates.
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Why-- why don't I
put it in his bag,
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and that'd be even funnier.
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And he'll open up
the bag expecting
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to find his business
things in there,
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and instead he'll
find this fishing fly.
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I think that'd be even funnier.
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00:02:24,013 --> 00:02:26,363
I wonder if he really is
going on a business trip.
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Well, if he wasn't,
this wouldn't be funny.
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I'm sure he's going
on the business trip.
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He told me so himself.
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Wait a minute!
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What's that?
Well, it's-- it's nothing!
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Nothing?
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That's his fishing junk.
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And he told me he was
going on a business trip.
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Well, I'm sure there--
there must be some logical
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explanation for this.
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And you're just as bad as he
is, smuggling over more fishing
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stuff disguised as perfume.
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Oh, hi, Oz.
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Oh.
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Say, that's a
pleasant surprise.
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00:02:54,086 --> 00:02:56,872
Oh, I-- I just stopped by
to wish you luck on your trip,
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on your business trip.
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Oh, thanks.
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Oh, don't rush off.
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My plane doesn't leave
for half an hour.
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Come on in.
Sit down.
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No!
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Well, I hope you've
packed everything you need--
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business shoes, business ties.
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Yes, yes.
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Business socks,
business shirts.
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Yes.
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Fishing license.
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Fishing license?
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00:03:13,584 --> 00:03:15,369
That's what I
said, you big phony!
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Business trip my eye,
you're going fishing.
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Ozzie said so.
Me?
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No, I didn't say that.
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Now, wait a minute.
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OK, so there's an
outside chance I
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might get in a little fishing.
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But does that give you the right
to go snooping through my bag?
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Don't you trust me?
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I do not, and for
a very good reason.
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I wouldn't have known
anything about this
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if Ozzie hadn't tried--
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That sounds pretty funny.
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Believe me, it wasn't
funny to poor Joe.
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Well, he deserves it.
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He had no right telling Clara
he was going on a business trip.
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But it is a business trip.
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He's going to meet his
boss and everything.
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It's just if he finishes
up a little early
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and has some time
on his hands, he's
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going to try to get
in some fishing.
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You mean, he's
still going to go?
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Well, either that
or lose his job.
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Sounds like he's more in
danger of losing his wife.
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Anybody home?
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Oh, hi, Clara.
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Hi, Clara.
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I don't know whether to
say hello to you or not.
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I'm not sure which
side you're on.
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Well, I think I'll take
the cowardly way out and be
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neutral.
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Where's Joe?
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I just drove him
to the airport.
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And believe me, it was
a very quiet drive.
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Well, listen.
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As long as you're
free this afternoon,
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why don't we go shopping?
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Oh, I'd love to,
but I just got a call
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from a friend I haven't
heard from in 20 years.
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Oh?
Who's that?
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00:04:28,268 --> 00:04:29,399
Barbara Cartwright.
Did I ever tell you about her?
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00:04:29,530 --> 00:04:30,792
No, I don't believe you did.
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Oh, we're very good friends.
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We used to go to
school together.
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Does she live in town here?
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00:04:34,970 --> 00:04:36,450
No, she's here for a visit.
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She's coming down to the
house later on this afternoon.
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00:04:38,669 --> 00:04:40,105
Oh, that sounds like fun.
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00:04:40,236 --> 00:04:42,369
Well, it would be, except
our place is such a mess
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00:04:42,499 --> 00:04:44,066
I'm embarrassed to
have anybody see it.
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Your place?
How come?
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00:04:45,937 --> 00:04:48,200
Well, Joe was supposed to
cut the lawn over the weekend.
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00:04:48,331 --> 00:04:50,420
Then he went off on this
so-called business trip
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and said he'd take
care of it later.
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00:04:52,248 --> 00:04:54,163
Well, can't you get somebody
else to cut it for you?
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00:04:54,294 --> 00:04:55,512
Well, it's not just the lawn.
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The trash barrels
are full, and there
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are leaves all over the place.
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Well, maybe some of the
kids in the neighborhood.
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00:05:01,736 --> 00:05:02,867
I've already tried that.
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00:05:02,998 --> 00:05:04,565
They're either out
playing football,
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00:05:04,695 --> 00:05:06,828
or they're at the
movies, or something.
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00:05:06,958 --> 00:05:11,746
Well, there must be somebody
you can get to do it for you.
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Ozzie?
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00:05:25,455 --> 00:05:27,239
I knew I could count on you.
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Well, here we are.
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Oh, my what a charming house.
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00:05:43,168 --> 00:05:44,692
Thank you.
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That husband of yours
certainly does a beautiful job
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on the yard, Clara.
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Huh?
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00:05:48,826 --> 00:05:51,046
Oh, yes, he does, doesn't he?
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00:05:51,176 --> 00:05:53,614
My husband loves to
work in the garden too.
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You should see his roses.
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They are just
beautiful, especially
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at this time of the year.
Here.
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Let me take your hat.
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00:06:00,185 --> 00:06:01,665
Oh, thank you.
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00:06:01,796 --> 00:06:03,537
Clara, I think I
better get on home.
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00:06:03,667 --> 00:06:06,061
Besides, you two probably
want to talk over old times.
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00:06:06,191 --> 00:06:07,236
Oh, no.
Come on, Harriet.
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00:06:07,367 --> 00:06:08,237
Stay for a while.
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00:06:08,368 --> 00:06:09,934
Oh, yes, please do.
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We'll have some coffee and
some non-fattening chocolate
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cake.
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00:06:13,285 --> 00:06:14,156
Oh, that's wonderful.
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00:06:14,286 --> 00:06:17,115
Yes, me too.
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You know, this
is a lovely table.
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Did your husband make it?
Joe?
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00:06:21,424 --> 00:06:22,294
I should say not.
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00:06:22,425 --> 00:06:23,295
Oh.
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00:06:23,426 --> 00:06:24,514
Well, I was just wondering.
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00:06:24,645 --> 00:06:27,125
Clarence loves to
make furniture.
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It's one of his hobbies.
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00:06:28,388 --> 00:06:29,824
Oh, that's nice.
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00:06:29,954 --> 00:06:31,129
Does Joe have any hobbies?
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00:06:31,260 --> 00:06:32,566
Oh, yes.
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00:06:32,696 --> 00:06:37,484
He likes fishing, and he
has a workshop out back.
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00:06:37,614 --> 00:06:44,578
He's made several--
and a couple of--
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May I have some
more coffee, Clara?
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00:06:46,231 --> 00:06:47,407
Yes, certainly.
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00:06:47,537 --> 00:06:49,017
You know, I've never met Joe.
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00:06:49,147 --> 00:06:50,018
Oh, you'd like him.
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00:06:50,148 --> 00:06:51,106
He's a wonderful guy.
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00:06:51,236 --> 00:06:52,673
He's lots of fun.
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00:06:52,803 --> 00:06:54,196
More coffee, Barbara?
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00:06:54,326 --> 00:06:56,459
No, thanks, even though
I hate to keep bragging
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00:06:56,590 --> 00:07:00,115
about my husband, but he really
is something pretty special.
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00:07:00,245 --> 00:07:01,377
Yes, he sounds like it.
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00:07:01,508 --> 00:07:02,987
I keep telling
Clarence he ought
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00:07:03,118 --> 00:07:05,207
to do a few things without
me once in a while.
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00:07:05,337 --> 00:07:06,730
But he won't hear of it.
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00:07:06,861 --> 00:07:09,167
He won't even go on a
business trip without me.
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00:07:09,298 --> 00:07:11,082
But I imagine
Joe's the same way.
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00:07:11,213 --> 00:07:12,693
Oh.
Oh, yes.
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00:07:12,823 --> 00:07:13,824
He's a wonderful guy.
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00:07:13,955 --> 00:07:15,130
There he is.
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00:07:15,260 --> 00:07:17,698
Say, he's nice
looking, isn't he?
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00:07:17,828 --> 00:07:18,786
Who?
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00:07:18,916 --> 00:07:20,135
Well, your husband, Joe.
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00:07:20,265 --> 00:07:21,963
You've never
met him, have you?
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00:07:22,093 --> 00:07:25,880
I just saw him out in the
yard carrying some trash cans.
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00:07:26,010 --> 00:07:26,924
Oh.
212
00:07:27,055 --> 00:07:27,925
Well, that's probably--
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00:07:28,056 --> 00:07:29,405
Yes, that's Joe.
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00:07:29,536 --> 00:07:31,625
It is?
215
00:07:31,755 --> 00:07:33,540
That's my Joe!
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00:07:33,670 --> 00:07:34,541
Oh.
217
00:07:34,671 --> 00:07:35,542
Oh, yeah.
218
00:07:35,672 --> 00:07:37,195
Yeah, that's Joe all right.
219
00:07:37,326 --> 00:07:39,284
Oh, I'd love to meet him.
220
00:07:39,415 --> 00:07:41,069
Oh, well, he has
his old clothes on.
221
00:07:41,199 --> 00:07:42,940
I'm afraid he's not
very presentable.
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00:07:43,071 --> 00:07:44,376
What difference
does that make?
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00:07:44,507 --> 00:07:45,900
Well, OK.
I'll get him.
224
00:07:46,030 --> 00:07:47,467
No, maybe you
better let me get him.
225
00:07:47,597 --> 00:07:48,468
Why don't you pour
some more coffee?
226
00:07:48,598 --> 00:07:49,469
All right.
227
00:07:49,599 --> 00:07:50,557
I'll pour some more coffee.
228
00:07:55,953 --> 00:07:57,259
You must be kidding.
229
00:07:57,389 --> 00:07:59,043
I can't go in there and
make believe I'm Joe.
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00:07:59,174 --> 00:08:00,088
Well, why not?
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00:08:00,218 --> 00:08:01,698
She's never seen him before.
232
00:08:01,829 --> 00:08:03,395
Besides, it'll only
be for a few minutes.
233
00:08:03,526 --> 00:08:05,180
She's just about ready to leave.
234
00:08:05,310 --> 00:08:07,617
Well, it's the most ridiculous
thing I've ever heard of.
235
00:08:07,748 --> 00:08:09,314
Why don't you tell
her the truth?
236
00:08:09,445 --> 00:08:12,883
He's out someplace goofing
off while I'm mowing his lawn,
237
00:08:13,014 --> 00:08:16,234
raking up his leaves,
carrying out his trash cans.
238
00:08:16,365 --> 00:08:18,454
Well, that's exactly
why we can't tell her.
239
00:08:18,585 --> 00:08:20,412
She's been in there
bragging about her husband,
240
00:08:20,543 --> 00:08:23,590
and Clara just doesn't want to
admit that Joe's out of town.
241
00:08:23,720 --> 00:08:25,330
Well, what's that
got to do with me?
242
00:08:25,461 --> 00:08:27,071
I told you, she
looked out of the window
243
00:08:27,202 --> 00:08:29,204
and thought you were Joe.
244
00:08:29,334 --> 00:08:31,249
In fact, she mentioned
how good looking you were.
245
00:08:31,380 --> 00:08:33,382
Oh, come on.
246
00:08:33,513 --> 00:08:35,471
You don't think I'm going
to fall for that, do you?
247
00:08:35,602 --> 00:08:36,777
Honest, that's what she said.
248
00:08:36,907 --> 00:08:38,300
You can ask Clara.
249
00:08:38,430 --> 00:08:41,477
Come on, will you, please?
250
00:08:42,609 --> 00:08:43,610
Well, OK.
251
00:08:43,740 --> 00:08:44,611
Oh, thank you, dear.
252
00:08:44,741 --> 00:08:45,699
Come on, hurry up.
253
00:08:57,275 --> 00:08:58,538
Now, don't forget.
254
00:08:58,668 --> 00:09:01,584
You're Joe, and you're
married to Clara.
255
00:09:01,715 --> 00:09:03,107
Ridiculous thing
I've ever heard of.
256
00:09:03,238 --> 00:09:04,108
Shh.
257
00:09:04,239 --> 00:09:06,981
Shh.
258
00:09:07,111 --> 00:09:08,896
Oh, hello, dear.
259
00:09:09,026 --> 00:09:10,941
Barbara, this is my husband Joe.
260
00:09:11,072 --> 00:09:12,073
This is Barbara Cartwright.
261
00:09:12,203 --> 00:09:13,074
How do you do?
262
00:09:13,204 --> 00:09:14,423
Well, hello.
263
00:09:14,554 --> 00:09:16,207
I hope you'll
forgive my appearance.
264
00:09:16,338 --> 00:09:18,166
I was just cleaning up the yard.
265
00:09:18,296 --> 00:09:19,646
Yes, yes, I know.
266
00:09:19,776 --> 00:09:21,952
Your wife's been
bragging to me about you.
267
00:09:22,083 --> 00:09:24,651
Oh, really?
268
00:09:24,781 --> 00:09:26,522
Well, thank you, dear.
269
00:09:26,653 --> 00:09:28,611
I almost feel as if I know you.
270
00:09:28,742 --> 00:09:31,179
Ha-- Clara has told
me so much about you.
271
00:09:31,309 --> 00:09:32,223
Oh, really?
272
00:09:32,354 --> 00:09:35,009
What did she say about me?
273
00:09:35,139 --> 00:09:39,274
Well, uh, she didn't tell
me how attractive you are.
274
00:09:39,404 --> 00:09:41,493
Thank you.
275
00:09:41,624 --> 00:09:43,974
I'll take these out
to the kitchen for you.
276
00:09:44,105 --> 00:09:45,149
Oh, thank you.
277
00:09:45,280 --> 00:09:46,411
He's so thoughtful.
278
00:09:46,542 --> 00:09:48,196
Yes, I can see.
279
00:09:48,326 --> 00:09:50,720
I wish my husband would be
that helpful around the house.
280
00:09:50,851 --> 00:09:53,070
Oh, Harriet, you have
a wonderful husband.
281
00:09:53,201 --> 00:09:54,071
Doesn't she?
282
00:09:54,202 --> 00:09:56,247
Oh, yes.
283
00:09:56,378 --> 00:09:57,248
Pardon me.
284
00:09:57,379 --> 00:09:58,336
Yes.
285
00:09:58,467 --> 00:10:00,077
Oh, Clara, you're a lucky girl.
286
00:10:00,208 --> 00:10:01,513
He seems awfully nice.
287
00:10:01,644 --> 00:10:02,863
Thank you.
288
00:10:02,993 --> 00:10:04,168
Would you excuse
me for just a minute?
289
00:10:04,299 --> 00:10:05,300
Yes, certainly.
290
00:10:07,998 --> 00:10:10,566
Ozzie, come back here.
291
00:10:10,697 --> 00:10:11,567
What's the matter?
292
00:10:11,698 --> 00:10:13,090
Where are you going?
293
00:10:13,221 --> 00:10:14,526
I'm getting out of here.
I made my appearance.
294
00:10:14,657 --> 00:10:15,963
Well, she'll be
leaving in a few minutes.
295
00:10:16,093 --> 00:10:17,138
At least you can say goodbye.
296
00:10:17,268 --> 00:10:18,618
Come on.
297
00:10:18,748 --> 00:10:20,228
I think I ought to
quit while I'm ahead.
298
00:10:20,358 --> 00:10:21,664
Look.
299
00:10:21,795 --> 00:10:22,665
Just come in, turn on
a little more charm,
300
00:10:22,796 --> 00:10:24,406
and that's all there is to it.
301
00:10:24,536 --> 00:10:25,668
OK.
302
00:10:25,799 --> 00:10:28,192
I can be pretty
charming, you know.
303
00:10:28,323 --> 00:10:31,108
It's been wonderful
visiting with you, Clara.
304
00:10:31,239 --> 00:10:32,893
I've enjoyed it so much.
305
00:10:33,023 --> 00:10:34,982
I'm so glad you could drop by.
306
00:10:35,112 --> 00:10:36,418
Oh, Barbara's leaving.
307
00:10:36,548 --> 00:10:38,115
- Oh, so soon?
- Well, yes.
308
00:10:38,246 --> 00:10:39,639
There are a few
things I should do,
309
00:10:39,769 --> 00:10:42,206
and my plane leaves rather
early in the morning.
310
00:10:42,337 --> 00:10:43,904
Are you sure you
can't stay for dinner?
311
00:10:44,034 --> 00:10:45,383
Oh, no.
312
00:10:45,514 --> 00:10:46,994
Thank you so much, Clara,
but I'm afraid not.
313
00:10:47,124 --> 00:10:47,995
It's a shame.
314
00:10:48,125 --> 00:10:49,561
We'd love to have had you stay.
315
00:10:49,692 --> 00:10:51,215
In fact, I've been
looking forward
316
00:10:51,346 --> 00:10:53,827
to enjoying your charming
company at the dinner table.
317
00:10:53,957 --> 00:10:56,786
Well, thank you, Joe.
318
00:10:56,917 --> 00:10:58,135
Clara's a wonderful cook.
319
00:10:58,266 --> 00:11:00,007
Oh, well, I'm not that good.
320
00:11:00,137 --> 00:11:01,878
Oh, what about
your beef stroganoff?
321
00:11:02,009 --> 00:11:05,099
She makes the most delicious
beef stroganoff in the world.
322
00:11:05,229 --> 00:11:07,405
No, that's my favorite.
323
00:11:07,536 --> 00:11:11,279
Oh, but if you have to
go, I guess you have to go.
324
00:11:11,409 --> 00:11:12,367
That's right.
325
00:11:12,497 --> 00:11:14,848
Awfully nice to have met you.
326
00:11:14,978 --> 00:11:16,458
Well, you know,
on second thought,
327
00:11:16,588 --> 00:11:17,851
I think maybe I will stay.
328
00:11:17,981 --> 00:11:19,287
That is if you
really want me to.
329
00:11:19,417 --> 00:11:20,288
Oh, certainly.
330
00:11:20,418 --> 00:11:21,506
That sounds great.
331
00:11:21,637 --> 00:11:23,117
Then I'll stay.
332
00:11:23,247 --> 00:11:25,728
That beef stroganoff sounds
too good to turn down.
333
00:11:29,950 --> 00:11:31,647
How am I playing it?
334
00:11:31,778 --> 00:11:32,735
Oh!
335
00:11:37,784 --> 00:11:40,090
Harriet, I've done
so well this far.
336
00:11:40,221 --> 00:11:41,744
Don't you think it
might be a good idea
337
00:11:41,875 --> 00:11:43,964
if I kind of eased out
of here, went on home,
338
00:11:44,094 --> 00:11:45,356
and didn't come back for dinner?
339
00:11:45,487 --> 00:11:47,010
Well, how would
Clara explain that?
340
00:11:47,141 --> 00:11:48,969
Well, I don't know, but
she'll figure out something.
341
00:11:49,099 --> 00:11:50,753
I can't keep this
up much longer.
342
00:11:50,884 --> 00:11:52,407
Well, you should have thought
of that before you practically
343
00:11:52,537 --> 00:11:53,843
insisted she stay for dinner.
344
00:11:53,974 --> 00:11:54,844
Joe?
345
00:11:54,975 --> 00:11:56,193
Joe, honey?
346
00:11:56,324 --> 00:11:57,194
Answer.
347
00:11:57,325 --> 00:11:58,369
That's you.
348
00:11:58,500 --> 00:12:00,415
Joe baby?
349
00:12:00,545 --> 00:12:02,199
I'm out here, Clara.
350
00:12:02,330 --> 00:12:03,418
Honey.
351
00:12:03,548 --> 00:12:06,943
Clara honey baby.
352
00:12:07,074 --> 00:12:08,249
You had me scared to death.
353
00:12:08,379 --> 00:12:09,816
I thought you were
sneaking out on me.
354
00:12:09,946 --> 00:12:11,295
Well, don't you
think it might be
355
00:12:11,426 --> 00:12:12,557
a good idea if I went bowling?
356
00:12:12,688 --> 00:12:14,037
Well, you could
have dinner first.
357
00:12:14,168 --> 00:12:15,865
- Where's Barbara?
- She's in the living room.
358
00:12:15,996 --> 00:12:17,301
What are we going to do?
359
00:12:17,432 --> 00:12:18,259
I don't know what you
guys are going to do,
360
00:12:18,389 --> 00:12:19,608
but I'm going to go home.
361
00:12:19,739 --> 00:12:20,435
After all, I wasn't
invited for dinner.
362
00:12:20,565 --> 00:12:21,653
Well, you are now.
363
00:12:21,784 --> 00:12:22,872
In fact, you're
going to cook it.
364
00:12:23,003 --> 00:12:24,221
- Who, me?
- Sure.
365
00:12:24,352 --> 00:12:25,875
I can't make beef stroganoff.
366
00:12:26,006 --> 00:12:27,659
Why couldn't you
leave well enough alone?
367
00:12:27,790 --> 00:12:29,052
You had to invite
her for dinner.
368
00:12:29,183 --> 00:12:30,793
I didn't invite her.
Clara did.
369
00:12:30,924 --> 00:12:32,012
You insisted upon it.
370
00:12:32,142 --> 00:12:33,448
She was practically
out of the door.
371
00:12:33,578 --> 00:12:34,536
Well, now, just a second.
372
00:12:34,666 --> 00:12:36,016
How come you're picking on me?
373
00:12:36,146 --> 00:12:38,932
I'm married to Clara.
374
00:12:39,062 --> 00:12:40,760
Besides, you told
me to be charming.
375
00:12:40,890 --> 00:12:43,545
Is it my fault if I
spilled over a little?
376
00:12:43,675 --> 00:12:44,981
Hi.
377
00:12:45,112 --> 00:12:46,504
I thought I heard you
guys talking out here.
378
00:12:46,635 --> 00:12:48,028
Oh, yes.
379
00:12:48,158 --> 00:12:49,812
Well, we were just trying
to decide about dinner.
380
00:12:49,943 --> 00:12:51,640
Clara's invited
me to stay too.
381
00:12:51,771 --> 00:12:52,902
Oh, how nice.
382
00:12:53,033 --> 00:12:54,599
This is my lucky day.
383
00:12:54,730 --> 00:12:58,429
Now I'll get a chance to meet
your husband too, won't I?
384
00:12:58,560 --> 00:13:02,259
Well, actually, he's going
to be pretty busy tonight.
385
00:13:02,390 --> 00:13:05,045
Yes, he's helping out a
friend who's in trouble.
386
00:13:05,175 --> 00:13:06,481
Oh, how thoughtful.
387
00:13:06,611 --> 00:13:08,744
It's nothing serious, I hope.
388
00:13:08,875 --> 00:13:10,702
Uh, well, we all have
our fingers crossed.
389
00:13:10,833 --> 00:13:12,835
Well, I think I'll go on
home for a little while.
390
00:13:12,966 --> 00:13:15,055
I'll see you a little bit later.
Yeah, me too.
391
00:13:15,185 --> 00:13:16,143
Joe!
392
00:13:16,273 --> 00:13:17,187
Where?
393
00:13:17,318 --> 00:13:18,710
Oh, I-- I think I'll--
394
00:13:18,841 --> 00:13:21,757
I'll go over and talk to
Ozzie for a little while.
395
00:13:21,888 --> 00:13:23,106
OK, sweetie pie.
396
00:13:23,237 --> 00:13:25,239
I'll see you later, dear.
397
00:13:38,948 --> 00:13:40,384
Hello.
398
00:13:40,515 --> 00:13:41,516
Oh, hi, Dave.
399
00:13:43,910 --> 00:13:46,260
Oh, well, we'll be over at the
Randolphs, but you have a key,
400
00:13:46,390 --> 00:13:47,783
don't you?
401
00:13:47,914 --> 00:13:48,784
OK.
402
00:13:48,915 --> 00:13:50,090
Say hello to June for me.
403
00:13:50,220 --> 00:13:52,657
Bye-bye.
404
00:13:52,788 --> 00:13:54,311
- Who's that?
- That was Dave.
405
00:13:54,442 --> 00:13:55,617
He and Rick are going
to come over and pick up
406
00:13:55,747 --> 00:13:56,748
some card tables.
407
00:13:59,577 --> 00:14:00,448
Wait a minute.
408
00:14:00,578 --> 00:14:01,753
What are you doing?
409
00:14:01,884 --> 00:14:02,754
Oh, what do you mean?
410
00:14:02,885 --> 00:14:04,626
Well, that coat and tie.
411
00:14:04,756 --> 00:14:06,280
- What's the matter with them?
- Well, nothing.
412
00:14:06,410 --> 00:14:08,369
They look fine, but you came
over here as Joe Randolph.
413
00:14:08,499 --> 00:14:10,545
You can't go back there
in Ozzie Nelson's clothes.
414
00:14:12,895 --> 00:14:14,244
Boy, I hope that
Joe appreciates
415
00:14:14,375 --> 00:14:15,985
what I'm doing for him.
Now, careful, dear.
416
00:14:16,116 --> 00:14:17,421
You're getting out of character.
417
00:14:17,552 --> 00:14:19,597
Don't forget, you're Joe.
418
00:14:19,728 --> 00:14:20,816
Yeah, I'm nuts too.
419
00:14:23,558 --> 00:14:26,082
Oh, here's Clarence
in his skiing outfit.
420
00:14:26,213 --> 00:14:28,563
Oh, he's a wonderful skier.
421
00:14:28,693 --> 00:14:30,086
Does Joe ski?
422
00:14:30,217 --> 00:14:33,133
I don't think he's ever tried.
423
00:14:33,263 --> 00:14:34,134
Who's that?
424
00:14:34,264 --> 00:14:36,353
Oh.
425
00:14:36,484 --> 00:14:37,398
Hi, dear.
426
00:14:37,528 --> 00:14:39,008
I just thought I'd sneak--
427
00:14:39,139 --> 00:14:41,184
I just thought I'd go upstairs
and change for dinner.
428
00:14:41,315 --> 00:14:42,316
OK.
429
00:14:45,145 --> 00:14:46,711
What's the matter?
430
00:14:46,842 --> 00:14:48,975
Oh, well, I just hope he
finds something that'll fit him.
431
00:14:49,105 --> 00:14:50,715
He's lost a little
weight recently.
432
00:15:19,614 --> 00:15:21,311
Well, that sure was
a good dinner, Clara.
433
00:15:21,442 --> 00:15:22,312
Joe is right.
434
00:15:22,443 --> 00:15:23,879
You're a wonderful cook.
435
00:15:24,010 --> 00:15:25,446
Oh, thank you.
436
00:15:25,576 --> 00:15:26,926
Why don't we have our
dessert in the living room?
437
00:15:27,056 --> 00:15:28,188
Oh, that's a good idea.
438
00:15:28,318 --> 00:15:29,450
Oh, don't bother with those.
439
00:15:29,580 --> 00:15:30,799
I'll take care of them later.
440
00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:32,366
Will you help me with
the coffee, Ozzie?
441
00:15:32,496 --> 00:15:33,454
Coffee Ozzie?
442
00:15:33,584 --> 00:15:35,282
What's that?
443
00:15:35,412 --> 00:15:39,416
Oh a Coffee Ozzie, that's a
special kind of coffee we've
444
00:15:39,547 --> 00:15:40,983
named after Harriet's husband.
445
00:15:41,114 --> 00:15:42,680
It's something he made up.
446
00:15:42,811 --> 00:15:44,030
Yeah, we call it Coffee Ozzie.
447
00:15:44,160 --> 00:15:45,074
It's very good too.
448
00:15:45,205 --> 00:15:46,075
Oh, really?
449
00:15:46,206 --> 00:15:47,337
What's in it?
450
00:15:47,468 --> 00:15:50,558
Oh, well, what's
in it, Harriet?
451
00:15:50,688 --> 00:15:53,213
Oh, well, I don't know.
452
00:15:53,343 --> 00:15:54,388
Ozzie usually makes it.
453
00:15:54,518 --> 00:15:55,389
What's in it, dear?
454
00:15:55,519 --> 00:15:57,391
I mean, Joe?
455
00:15:57,521 --> 00:16:00,437
Well, it's a kind of a secret.
456
00:16:00,568 --> 00:16:02,265
I mean, if I were Joe--
457
00:16:02,396 --> 00:16:05,094
if I were Ozzie, I
mean, if I were--
458
00:16:05,225 --> 00:16:07,836
why don't we just have
some regular coffee?
459
00:16:07,967 --> 00:16:09,359
Well, if it's not
too much trouble,
460
00:16:09,490 --> 00:16:10,752
I think I'd rather have tea.
461
00:16:10,882 --> 00:16:12,188
- Yes, me too.
- All right.
462
00:16:12,319 --> 00:16:13,842
Would you like some tea, Ozzie?
463
00:16:13,973 --> 00:16:16,714
Ozzie makes tea too?
464
00:16:16,845 --> 00:16:21,719
A tea for two, a two for tea!
465
00:16:21,850 --> 00:16:24,331
Oh, Joe, you can
be so silly at times.
466
00:16:24,461 --> 00:16:27,290
Yeah, aren't you glad?
467
00:16:27,421 --> 00:16:28,813
Why don't we go
in the living room?
468
00:16:28,944 --> 00:16:31,642
OK.
469
00:16:31,773 --> 00:16:33,601
Just make yourselves
comfortable.
470
00:16:33,731 --> 00:16:34,906
We'll be right with you.
471
00:16:37,474 --> 00:16:39,215
Well, they make quite
a couple, don't they?
472
00:16:39,346 --> 00:16:40,651
Yes, they do.
473
00:16:40,782 --> 00:16:42,131
You can tell they were
meant for each other.
474
00:16:42,262 --> 00:16:43,698
She just can't keep
her eyes off him.
475
00:16:43,828 --> 00:16:46,266
Yeah, I noticed that.
476
00:16:46,396 --> 00:16:49,269
Clara, will you
stop calling me Ozzie?
477
00:16:49,399 --> 00:16:50,270
I can't help it.
478
00:16:50,400 --> 00:16:51,662
I keep forgetting.
479
00:16:51,793 --> 00:16:53,664
You'd forget too if
you had to call me Joe.
480
00:16:53,795 --> 00:16:55,449
You keep staring at me.
481
00:16:55,579 --> 00:16:56,450
It's that coat.
482
00:16:56,580 --> 00:16:57,712
I can't get over it.
483
00:16:57,842 --> 00:16:58,930
It fits you better
than it does Joe.
484
00:16:59,061 --> 00:16:59,931
Well, naturally.
485
00:17:00,062 --> 00:17:01,324
It's my coat.
486
00:17:01,455 --> 00:17:02,891
Well, what was it
doing up in our bedroom?
487
00:17:03,022 --> 00:17:04,327
Oh, I fished it up.
488
00:17:04,458 --> 00:17:06,373
I brought it up
with a fishing line.
489
00:17:06,503 --> 00:17:07,548
Fishing line?
490
00:17:07,678 --> 00:17:09,550
If you'll pardon
the expression.
491
00:17:09,680 --> 00:17:10,768
Where are the cups?
492
00:17:10,899 --> 00:17:12,814
They're here where
they always are.
493
00:17:12,944 --> 00:17:14,033
Well, how would I know that?
494
00:17:14,163 --> 00:17:15,556
I'm not Joe.
495
00:17:15,686 --> 00:17:17,819
Yes, you are!
496
00:17:17,949 --> 00:17:18,950
OK, I'm Joe.
497
00:17:21,866 --> 00:17:23,477
Oh, chocolate mints!
498
00:17:23,607 --> 00:17:24,652
I love these.
499
00:17:24,782 --> 00:17:26,045
Thank you, Barbara.
500
00:17:26,175 --> 00:17:27,307
Oh, that's OK.
501
00:17:27,437 --> 00:17:28,786
I almost forgot to
give them to you.
502
00:17:28,917 --> 00:17:29,787
Harriet?
503
00:17:29,918 --> 00:17:30,962
Oh, thank you.
504
00:17:31,093 --> 00:17:32,486
Well, now where's Joe?
505
00:17:32,616 --> 00:17:35,141
I have a little
something for him too.
506
00:17:35,271 --> 00:17:36,272
Oh, he's in the kitchen.
507
00:17:36,403 --> 00:17:37,404
Joe?
508
00:17:40,363 --> 00:17:42,800
I'll get him.
509
00:17:42,931 --> 00:17:46,804
That's right, and
sign it "the boss."
510
00:17:46,935 --> 00:17:49,981
That'll go out right
away, won't it?
511
00:17:50,112 --> 00:17:52,332
About when will it be delivered?
512
00:17:52,462 --> 00:17:54,377
Oh, good.
513
00:17:54,508 --> 00:17:55,509
What are you doing?
514
00:17:55,639 --> 00:17:57,337
I just sent myself a telegram.
515
00:17:57,467 --> 00:17:59,034
That is, I sent it to Joe.
A telegram?
516
00:17:59,165 --> 00:18:00,731
What for?
517
00:18:00,862 --> 00:18:02,777
Well, so I can get out of
here before we all crack up.
518
00:18:02,907 --> 00:18:05,040
It says I have to leave
town on business right away,
519
00:18:05,171 --> 00:18:06,563
and it's signed "the boss."
520
00:18:06,694 --> 00:18:08,391
Well, you better come
back into the living room.
521
00:18:08,522 --> 00:18:10,089
Barbara's got a present for you.
522
00:18:10,219 --> 00:18:12,003
I hope it's a bottle
of tranquilizers.
523
00:18:15,572 --> 00:18:17,705
Now, I hope you like it.
524
00:18:17,835 --> 00:18:20,273
Oh, a Benson's blend?
525
00:18:20,403 --> 00:18:22,144
It's one of
Clarence's favorites.
526
00:18:22,275 --> 00:18:24,364
He loves a pipe after
dinner, and I thought maybe
527
00:18:24,494 --> 00:18:25,626
you would too.
528
00:18:25,756 --> 00:18:27,454
I'm so glad to see
that I was right.
529
00:18:27,584 --> 00:18:29,412
Oh, Joe loves a good pipe!
530
00:18:29,543 --> 00:18:32,633
Oh, let me get one for you.
531
00:18:32,763 --> 00:18:33,721
Oh, here we are.
532
00:18:33,851 --> 00:18:34,939
How about this one?
533
00:18:35,070 --> 00:18:36,593
Oh, that's one
of his favorites.
534
00:18:36,724 --> 00:18:39,770
Well, yes, but I'm not sure
I want to smoke right now.
535
00:18:39,901 --> 00:18:42,251
I don't usually smoke
when we have company.
536
00:18:42,382 --> 00:18:43,513
Clara doesn't like me too.
537
00:18:43,644 --> 00:18:46,560
Oh, I love the
smell of a good pipe!
538
00:18:46,690 --> 00:18:49,258
Oh, but maybe Harriet doesn't.
539
00:18:49,389 --> 00:18:50,738
Her husband doesn't smoke.
540
00:18:50,868 --> 00:18:52,740
Do you mind, Harriet?
541
00:18:52,870 --> 00:18:53,741
Oh, no.
542
00:18:53,871 --> 00:18:54,785
Not really.
543
00:18:54,916 --> 00:18:56,135
Well, this is mild.
544
00:18:56,265 --> 00:18:57,875
It's kind of a rum
and marmalade blend.
545
00:18:58,006 --> 00:19:00,051
Here you are.
546
00:19:01,923 --> 00:19:03,011
That's a telegram for me.
547
00:19:07,189 --> 00:19:08,059
Hi, pop.
548
00:19:08,190 --> 00:19:10,584
Oh!
549
00:19:10,714 --> 00:19:12,151
Oh, yes.
550
00:19:12,281 --> 00:19:14,065
Gee, I'm sorry to bother
you, but I was wondering
551
00:19:14,196 --> 00:19:15,458
if I could borrow your car.
552
00:19:15,589 --> 00:19:17,025
- Oh, sure.
- Something's wrong with mine.
553
00:19:17,156 --> 00:19:18,548
I left it over at your house.
554
00:19:18,679 --> 00:19:19,549
Did they say pop?
555
00:19:19,680 --> 00:19:21,551
Are those your boys, Clara?
556
00:19:21,682 --> 00:19:22,552
Oh, well--
557
00:19:22,683 --> 00:19:23,597
Hi, mom.
558
00:19:23,727 --> 00:19:24,946
Hello, boys.
559
00:19:25,076 --> 00:19:27,166
Bye, fellas.
560
00:19:27,296 --> 00:19:28,558
Oh, tell them to come in.
561
00:19:28,689 --> 00:19:29,994
I'd love to meet them.
562
00:19:30,125 --> 00:19:31,213
Well, they might
be in a hurry.
563
00:19:31,344 --> 00:19:32,649
Oh, yes.
564
00:19:32,780 --> 00:19:34,129
We're not interrupting
anything, are we, pop?
565
00:19:34,260 --> 00:19:35,478
Well--
566
00:19:35,609 --> 00:19:36,610
Have them come in
for a minute, dear.
567
00:19:36,740 --> 00:19:39,090
Uh, well, OK.
568
00:19:39,221 --> 00:19:41,441
You might as well go in.
569
00:19:41,571 --> 00:19:45,184
What kind of a party
is this anyway, pop?
570
00:19:45,314 --> 00:19:47,534
These are the
boys, Rick and David.
571
00:19:47,664 --> 00:19:48,709
This is Mrs. Cartwright.
572
00:19:48,839 --> 00:19:49,753
Well, how do you do?
573
00:19:49,884 --> 00:19:51,320
How do you do?
574
00:19:51,451 --> 00:19:53,017
And of course you know
Mrs. Nelson, our neighbor,
575
00:19:53,148 --> 00:19:56,412
and your father, Joe.
576
00:19:56,543 --> 00:19:59,720
Clara, why didn't you tell
me you had two lovely boys?
577
00:19:59,850 --> 00:20:00,851
Well, you know how it is.
578
00:20:00,982 --> 00:20:02,418
One minute they're
little fellas,
579
00:20:02,549 --> 00:20:04,246
and before you get a chance
to even mention them,
580
00:20:04,377 --> 00:20:07,336
they're all grown up.
581
00:20:07,467 --> 00:20:09,033
Well, it's nice
to have met you.
582
00:20:09,164 --> 00:20:10,513
Oh, are you boys
going downtown?
583
00:20:10,644 --> 00:20:11,993
Yes, we are.
584
00:20:12,123 --> 00:20:13,560
Would you mind dropping
me off at my hotel?
585
00:20:13,690 --> 00:20:14,561
We'll be glad to.
586
00:20:14,691 --> 00:20:15,953
Oh, thank you.
587
00:20:16,084 --> 00:20:17,477
Would you get
Mrs. Cartwrap's--
588
00:20:17,607 --> 00:20:20,784
Mrs. Cart-- Mrs.-- would
you get her coat, please?
589
00:20:20,915 --> 00:20:22,264
Sure.
590
00:20:22,395 --> 00:20:23,657
You have to leave so soon?
591
00:20:23,787 --> 00:20:24,962
Oh, well, I'm afraid so.
592
00:20:25,093 --> 00:20:26,399
I didn't realize
how late it was,
593
00:20:26,529 --> 00:20:28,139
and I've got to get
packed and everything.
594
00:20:28,270 --> 00:20:29,445
But I do want to thank you.
595
00:20:29,576 --> 00:20:30,794
I had a wonderful time.
596
00:20:30,925 --> 00:20:32,013
Well, thank you.
597
00:20:32,143 --> 00:20:33,884
We've had quite
a time ourselves.
598
00:20:34,015 --> 00:20:36,452
It looks like
we've got it made.
599
00:20:36,583 --> 00:20:38,541
Now, I want you to
promise to come and visit me
600
00:20:38,672 --> 00:20:40,587
as soon as you get a chance.
Oh, thank you.
601
00:20:40,717 --> 00:20:41,675
You too, Joe!
602
00:20:41,805 --> 00:20:42,937
Oh, thank you.
603
00:20:43,067 --> 00:20:43,938
Surprise.
604
00:20:44,068 --> 00:20:44,982
Hi, sweetheart!
605
00:20:45,113 --> 00:20:45,983
Ozzie!
606
00:20:46,114 --> 00:20:47,942
What a wonderful surprise.
607
00:20:48,072 --> 00:20:50,336
Oh, this is our
neighbor, Ozzie Nelson.
608
00:20:50,466 --> 00:20:51,511
This is Mrs. Cartwright.
609
00:20:51,641 --> 00:20:52,947
Well, how do you do?
610
00:20:53,077 --> 00:20:54,209
She has to catch a flight.
611
00:20:59,040 --> 00:21:01,434
OK, well, thanks a lot, Dave.
612
00:21:01,564 --> 00:21:03,523
Bye.
613
00:21:03,653 --> 00:21:05,568
That was Dave, as
you probably guessed.
614
00:21:05,699 --> 00:21:07,657
He said they got Barbara
back to her hotel OK.
615
00:21:07,788 --> 00:21:09,180
Oh, that's good.
616
00:21:09,311 --> 00:21:10,878
It's kind of nice to have
my husband back again.
617
00:21:11,008 --> 00:21:12,488
It's kind of nice to be back.
618
00:21:12,619 --> 00:21:14,534
Oh, and I want you to promise
me one thing-- tomorrow,
619
00:21:14,664 --> 00:21:16,666
you and Clara sit down
and write a long letter
620
00:21:16,797 --> 00:21:19,321
to Barbara explaining
the whole situation.
621
00:21:19,452 --> 00:21:21,018
I don't want to have
it on my conscience.
622
00:21:21,149 --> 00:21:22,498
OK, tomorrow,
we'll write a letter
623
00:21:22,629 --> 00:21:23,934
so it won't be on
your conscience.
624
00:21:24,065 --> 00:21:26,633
Oh, I'll sign it too.
625
00:21:27,764 --> 00:21:28,678
Hi!
626
00:21:28,809 --> 00:21:29,810
Well, hi, Clara.
627
00:21:29,940 --> 00:21:30,898
Hi, Clara.
628
00:21:31,028 --> 00:21:32,291
Can I spend the night here?
629
00:21:32,421 --> 00:21:33,335
I'm lonesome.
630
00:21:33,466 --> 00:21:34,945
Well, where's Joe?
631
00:21:35,076 --> 00:21:37,644
Don't even mention his
name to me, that big fake,
632
00:21:37,774 --> 00:21:39,646
that phony baloney.
Well, what do you mean?
633
00:21:39,776 --> 00:21:41,169
He came all the way back
with the flowers and all.
634
00:21:41,300 --> 00:21:42,779
That's right.
635
00:21:42,910 --> 00:21:44,041
And then he turned right
around and went fishing again.
636
00:21:44,172 --> 00:21:45,695
- He did?
- Yes.
637
00:21:45,826 --> 00:21:47,915
He got this phony looking
Telegram signed "the boss,"
638
00:21:48,045 --> 00:21:50,744
and he's on his
way to the airport.
639
00:21:50,874 --> 00:21:53,050
Oh my gosh, the telegram,
I forgot all about it.
640
00:21:53,181 --> 00:21:54,400
Well, I've got to stop him.
641
00:22:02,190 --> 00:22:03,887
If I can't stop
him, I'll join him.
642
00:22:22,210 --> 00:22:30,305
Try to remember
the kind of September
643
00:22:30,436 --> 00:22:38,618
when life was slow
and, oh, so mellow.
644
00:22:38,748 --> 00:22:50,499
Try to remember the kind of
September when grass was green
645
00:22:50,630 --> 00:22:54,808
and grain was yellow.
646
00:22:54,938 --> 00:23:02,598
Try to remember when
life was so tender
647
00:23:02,729 --> 00:23:10,954
that love was an
ember about to billow.
648
00:23:11,085 --> 00:23:21,095
Try to remember, and if
you remember, then follow.
649
00:23:21,225 --> 00:23:23,619
Follow, follow.
650
00:23:26,622 --> 00:23:31,801
Try to
remember when life
651
00:23:31,932 --> 00:23:43,117
was so tender that no one
wept except the willow.
652
00:23:43,247 --> 00:23:50,820
Try to remember when
life was so tender
653
00:23:50,951 --> 00:23:59,263
that dreams were kept
beside your pillow.
654
00:23:59,394 --> 00:24:11,014
Deep in December, it's nice to
remember the fire of September
655
00:24:11,145 --> 00:24:15,454
that made us mellow.
656
00:24:15,584 --> 00:24:25,464
Deep in December, it's nice
to remember and follow.
657
00:24:25,594 --> 00:24:26,552
Follow.
658
00:24:40,304 --> 00:24:42,002
Tonight's "Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet"
659
00:24:42,132 --> 00:24:45,658
was brought to you by
Colgate with Gardol.
660
00:24:45,788 --> 00:24:48,399
The anti-cavity
toothpaste, Colgate--
661
00:24:48,530 --> 00:24:50,750
clinically tested and
confirmed unsurpassed
662
00:24:50,880 --> 00:24:52,839
in reducing new cavities.
45633
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