Original subtitles

- Whoa, this is wild. - No, this is "wipeout."

- Oh. - [screaming]

- The big balls are back, america.

- [screaming]

- I am nicole byer. - And I'm john cena.

We'll be your guides as we reintroduce you

To the most insane competition show known to man.

- [screaming]

- She got hit hard.

But that's the game of "wipeout."

Both: Olé! - [imitating drums]

- Each week, teams of two will compete for their share

Of the $25,000 grand prize.

The courses are crazier...

- [screaming]

- The contestants are bendier. - That one's gotta hurt.

- And the hosts are sexier.

Beauty and brawn, brains and brawn,

Funny and brawn.

- Don't set their expectations too high, nicole.

What if we don't deliver?

[laughter]

Both: Welcome back, america, to "wipeout!"

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Hello, everyone, and welcome to "wipeout."

- The messiest place in america besides twitter.

I'm nicole byer. - And I'm john cena.

And we've got more teams banging down our door,

All vying for a chance at $25,000.

Nicole, is that-- is that my phone?

- Yeah, I'm just going through your texts,

Making sure you're not texting any other coworkers.

Don't worry. I saw everything,

And I truly got to say meh.

- Nicole!

- And why is your wallpaper a pic of you and pauly shore?

- You get a chance at a photo op with the weasel,

You gotta show it off, bu-ddy. - Huh.

- Ten teams face the qualifier today,

A five-part obstacle course behemoth.

First, they'll need to jump through our spinning rings

At the hoop hopper.

- Then they'll have to keep their balance at rumble road.

- Next up, a "wipeout" classic, the big balls.

Make it across and grab smallsy for a $250 bonus.

- After that, it's the body blender.

Jump the hurdles or get cut down in the process.

- And finally, the players end with a swinging

And swing jigglelator

Before a final leap to the finish platform.

The six fastest teams to finish the qualifier

Make it through to the next round.

- But before we start, john,

Let's check in with our incredible roving reporter,

Camille kostek, who's with our first team.

- Thanks, guys. I'm down here with katelyn and bryce.

Welcome to "wipeout."

- Hello. - Thank you.

- How do you guys know each other?

- We are actually siblings.

- Oh! - Yeah.

We grew up dancing together and then ended up

Actually working together in an aerialist job.

- Aerialists? - Can I see some of your moves?

- So can they fly? - Oh, that's it!

- Oh, john, do I have to explain to you

That peter pan isn't real again?

- And that's why you'll never be able to get into neverland.

- Okay, my turn. - Whoo! Oh, yes.

Ta-da! [laughter]

I didn't stick that landing.

- I'm katelyn. - And I'm bryce.

- And we are... Both: The soaring siblings.

- We are professional dancers.

- We've grown up traveling the nation

Since we were really little, competing, winning titles.

[applause]

- We definitely have a high tolerance of pain.

We'll be ready to push through after a big wipeout.

I think our coordination will really help.

- We're going to prance and skip

Right over the big, red balls.

- Whoo! - Whoo!

- Soaring sibling katelyn looking to get the air show

Started at the hoop hopper.

Oh!

- Oh, my god! Okay.

- It's not so easy

When your brother's not there to catch you.

- It's also not so easy

When your brother has a better ponytail than you.

- Gotta go. Let's go!

- Maybe she'll have better luck

Taking off at rumble road.

- John, I believe she can fly. I believe she can...

Oh! - Oh.

- Hit her head on the platform

Before being knocked into the water.

- And bryce is ready to take off at the big balls.

- You got it, bryce!

Big, red balls! Let's go!

Oh, god!

- For aerialists, they spend a lot of time in the water.

♪ ♪

Soaring sibling katelyn tumbles through

The jigglelator.

♪ ♪

- Hanging on. - I got this.

- Yes.

- No, you don't.

- Wow, john, no need to go for the jig-ular.

- With a time of 6 minutes and 55 seconds,

Will it be enough for the soaring siblings

To tumble into the gauntlet?

- Well, those two really flew through the air

With the greatest of ease, just like at the circus.

- I love the circus.

- Ladies and gentlemen,

Welcome to the cirque de wipeout.

Step right up and see our world-class butt jugglers!

- What? - Team booty flippers!

- I don't understand how to do this.

- Watch as they flip and flop their booties

Through the course.

- Climb, climb, climb.

- I'm moving as fast as I can.

- See a sight like no other.

Two former high school enemies who are now friends.

It's team former frenemies.

Her current enemy is the hoop hopper.

And what circus is complete

Without an acrobatic musical act?

Team high kicks & high notes have got the moves.

And they can sing like mariah carey's...

- ♪ [sings note badly] ♪

No, I can't! - Cousin who never made it.

The greatest wipeout on earth has it all.

Venmo me for tickets.

- We'll see if any of our wipeout circus acts

Makes it into the gauntlet, but for now, let's check in

With camille, who's with our next team.

- Thanks, guys. I'm down here with jolisa and marissa.

Welcome to "wipeout." [both shout]

You guys are actresses? - Yes.

- Can we pretend to do an audition right now?

- Yeah. - We're ready.

- You are auditioning for a horror movie,

And a big scary monster just came in.

- [screams]

- All right, hired. Great job.

And I just proposed to you. - Oh, my god. Yes!

Oh, my god! [both scream]

- Super believable.

- Jolisa has a good scream for a horror film.

- [screaming]

- That was my scream when I heard

They were discontinuing leopard crocs.

- Go, go, go! Go, go, go, go, go, go.

- Marissa can clearly do her own stunts.

- Oh, my god! - [laughing]

- [screaming]

- Can she? - [laughing]

- Poor girl's getting tossed around

Like she's in the spin cycle.

- Oh, my god! [screaming]

- You gotta take things in hollywood step by step.

- Yeah. The steps are:

Get off the plane, audition,

Get an agent, throw your phone at an assistant.

- Jolisa takes off from the runway.

Both: Oh!

- Lands hollywood-adjacent.

- They're definitely making a splash in hollywood.

- You think these girls will ever be famous?

- I think if snooki still has a career,

Anything is possible.

- Yeah, once I get out this pool,

Somebody gonna get it.

- And scene. [cheering]

It's a wrap for the wannabe actresses

With a runtime of 18:04.

I hope they enjoyed their 18 minutes

And 4 seconds of fame.

Together: We see the future! We already won this!

[air horn blares]

- Next up is yoki and mason, team psychic friends network.

- Oh. - Ooh!

- Whoo!

- Can you see the future in how you're going to do today?

- I see us winning.

- Whoa!

- I see falling a little. Iconic moments

[laughter] - yes, iconic moments today.

- Yes.

- If I'm gonna fall, I'm gonna fall cute, you know?

- Okay. Yes.

- Will the big balls align for yoki?

- Oh no. Wait, what the--

- Oh no! - Oh, that's bad.

Note to anybody who wears a wig.

If you wear it on "wipeout," you gon' lose it.

- Oh, no!

- The psychic didn't see that wipeout coming.

- Nicole, I may be psychic, too,

'cause I can see many more wild wipeouts to come.

- Duh. Now, gimme those winning lottery numbers, john.

[upbeat music]

- Nicole, is there an old celebrity you would date?

- Patrick stewart, patrick swayze.

Maybe denzel washington, but he's got very big teeth.

No, I want him. Yes, those three.

- Welcome back, america,

To the tsunami of slip-ups we call "wipeout."

- We're halfway through the qualifier

With plenty more to go.

Some teams clearly have the communication skills

Required to make it through. Some don't.

- Is this about me eating lunch without you today?

E

Or your fear of cats or your ankles.

Oh, my god,

How could I forget about your delicate, little ankies?

- Uh, we have a qualifier to get back to now,

So let's head back down to the field.

- They're ankles like a stick figure.

- Next, we have roommate rocket scientists...

[screaming] emily and melissa.

- [laughing] what?

What's up?

- I'm melissa. - I'm emily.

- And we are... Both: The rocket scientists.

- We are both engineers in the space industry,

So we work with spacecraft systems.

- There are definitely not a ton of women in the industry,

But it is absolutely growing.

♪ ♪

- We have a leg up on the competition

Because we understand how the physical world works.

- We're going to be thinking about our momentum,

Our center of gravity. This is a game of physics.

We know physics. We got this.

- Emily and melissa are ready to launch.

Three, two, one.

[air horn blares] - and blast off.

- Maybe these women will prove that winning "wipeout"

Is rocket science.

- Oh! - Maybe not.

- Wow, she just hit the water with approximately...

[computers beeping] 968 pounds of force.

- This is clearly a malfunction

In the flux capacitor,

Which caused the trajectory to shift

From success to catastrophic failure.

- Wow. Impressive, nicole.

- Let's go, em!

- What do you think is harder?

Going into space or the body blender?

- [yelps]

- Well, in space, no one can hear you scream,

But on the body blender, that's all we hear.

♪ ♪

[water squishing]

♪ ♪

- Emily taking on the final frontier of the course,

The jigglelator.

- Ooh!

- This is like rocket science boot camp.

Wait, do aliens punch people?

- It may be time to abort mission, ladies.

- They didn't break the sound barrier,

But they went pretty fast,

But with 6 minutes and 40 seconds,

Fast enough to get in the gauntlet.

- Isaac newton would be proud.

- Oh, god, thank you. That means so much to me.

- John and nicole, back to you.

- Nicole, do you think you'd make a good astronaut?

- Well, I don't love enclosed spaces.

Even sharing this booth with you, ooh,

It makes me a little claustrophobic.

- Oh, do you need some space? - Yeah, can you back up?

- Sure. - Yeah, further.

A little further.

Oh, just a couple more inches. Little bit more.

- How about now? - Ooh, that's perfect.

Now, let's meet our next team.

Meet engaged to play.

After dating for eight years,

These two gamer nerds managed to pause

Their video games long enough to get engaged.

- You guys excited for the course?

- Yep. - Oh, yeah, yeah.

- Do you guys ever look at each other?

- At dinner. - Sometimes.

- Sometimes.

- I really just wanna just smash the video game right now.

- On the course, jermaine tries to make like mario

Across the big balls.

[video game music]

- But smallsy is in another castle.

- Vanessa has leveled up to body blender.

Ooh, and it looks like she had an extra life.

And she ends up right back where she started again.

She may want to use a cheat code.

- I know what she could use.

Up, up, down, down, left, right, out.

- It's a lot harder than the "frogger."

Probably I'm going with mario.

- And with a time of 10 minutes and 15 seconds,

Will engaged to play and make it to the next level?

Only time will tell.

- Is this where we all do the "fortnite" dance?

- No, no. This is where we move on.

[upbeat music]

Up next, sean and nicole.

They're little volleyball-obsessed.

- Go on!

- I am nicole. - I am sean.

- And we are... Both: The volleyballers.

- Prepare to be spiked.

- Sean and I met playing beach volleyball.

- We're both married. Not to each other.

- We've literally run into each other calling the ball,

Screaming on each other, causing a scene.

That's why we are perfect to be partners together.

- Our strategy is to communicate and go, go, go.

Go, go, go, go, go. Now!

- He was not kidding about their strategy.

- [screams]

- Oh, god. - [screams]

- Oh!

Go, go, go quickly turned into bye, bye, bye.

- John cena an 'nsync fan?

I always figured you for a juggalo.

- Get up outta here if you ain't down with the clown.

- Glide across them. You got it.

- Here's nicole at the big balls.

- You got it. Oh!

- She's not experienced with balls this size.

- And it shows.

- Eat, sleep, volleyball! Eat, sleep, volleyball!

- Go, go, go, go, go, go!

- If sean can't rally a win after that pep talk,

I don't know what else we can do.

- Soapy and slippery! - Okay.

- Oh, god!

- And the jigglelator bumps sean right out of bounds.

- Yeah! - There it is.

- Yes! With a time of 6 minutes and 37 seconds,

The volleyballers are set to advance to the gauntlet

With the fastest time of the day.

- A light-speed second faster than the rocket scientists.

- Also moving on to the gauntlet will be

Soaring siblings, booty flippers.

And our slowest teams advancing,

Former frenemies and engaged to play.

- This sounds like the "breakfast club" reunion

No one asked for.

- Well, you know what they did ask for?

More "wipeout."

And we've got a fierce gauntlet on the way.

[upbeat music]

- So john, what advice would you give the contestants

Who are running the course?

- Run away. You've made a foolish choice.

Your dignity is on the line. Go home.

- Yeah, I agree.

- Is that good enough? That's motivational, right?

- I--you know, it's not motivational.

I won't lie to you, john.

- Everyone take a breath and relax.

"wipeout" is back.

Our six remaining teams will need to channel

Some inner strength to tackle our next course, the gauntlet.

- Oh no, john.

Are you gonna go all self-help on me again?

I'm already almost too confident.

Just take us to the gauntlet.

- The gauntlet will be done in two heats.

Each heat, three teams competing at the same time

Will be practically climbing over one another,

Starting at the carous-hell.

- Then it's a foot race through the disgusting

Mud pits and slippery slopes of the messy mile.

- And finally, the pummel pool,

Where the choice between the revolving french fries

And the giant, spinning lollipop

Could make or break it all.

- The first team to have both members cross the finish line

Moves on to the wipeout zone.

Teams taking on the gauntlet in the first heat

Are the volleyballers.

- The friction-free former frenemies.

- And the very flexible soaring siblings.

- Do you bring it this direct--

- Did he just say he was unique?

- No, he said he was a eunuch. - Well, that is unique.

- Congratulations on making it to the gauntlet.

All: Whoo! - Here we go. Three, two, one.

[air horn blares]

♪ ♪

- Volleyballer sean showing he's got vigor

And a strong grip as he rides

The carousel and pancakes to the first landing.

- Got it. Yeah! - This is so fast.

Oh, my god, I'm going to throw up.

- Aerialist's bryce is having a hard time

With the velocity of the propeller.

- Then he definitely couldn't handle driving with me.

- Whoo.

♪ ♪

- The former frenemy warren leaves his bff,

Betty, behind and makes it through.

They might change to current frenemies

Before this game is over.

- I'm going to sit here with you guys.

- This is the high school cafeteria all over again.

- It's why I always sat with the janitor.

♪ ♪

- [groans]

- In comes katelyn, catching up to her brother.

- Meanwhile, betty hasn't budged.

- I can't do it.

- Betty, come on. You got this. - Warren, I can't do this.

- You had it. Come on.

Otherwise, I'm gonna be talking [bleep] your way.

- Threatening to talk [bleep]

Is what got me homecoming queen

Back in high school. Maybe it'll work here, too.

- Oh, my god!

- Oh! And it worked!

- Oh!

- Hey, uh-oh. No, it didn't.

- Soaring sis katelyn effortlessly makes it

To the next landing

Using her aerialist expertise on the swinging ring.

The sweeper bar didn't even touch her.

- You got this, nicole. Just hug it.

Hug it like you're getting married.

- Hug it like I hug john cena every morning as he mutters,

[deep voice] "this is unprofessional."

- Great impression. - [laughs]

[normally] thank you.

And nicole makes it. Go wait, nicole.

- The volleyballers are on the attack.

Sean takes a hit from the sweeper

But holds on and lands it.

- Nice, sean! [applause]

- Nicole, this is going to be slippery when you--

- Oh, [bleep] that penis thing.

- Hey, that thing's got a name, and it's dirk dangler.

- It hasn't swung that far before.

- Oh, you haven't seen how far this dangler can swing?

- Watch it, watch it. - Oh, sorry.

- Stand up and grab the ring. - The [bleep] is coming.

- I've heard that before.

- I don't think that's family-friendly.

- Depends on how cool your family is.

You just never know when

Dirk's gonna reach out and touch someone.

- Warren is tired of waiting for his high school bully

Turned friend and swings to the next platform.

- Get ready to catch me. - Pick up your legs.

- You trust me.

- Up, up, up. You're good, you're good.

- Volleyballers has had the fastest time in the qualifier

And are now the first team to advance to the messy mile.

- You got it, you got it. You got it.

- Soaring siblings katelyn and bryce emotionally embrace.

Aww. Come on, john.

Bring it in. You know what time it is.

- I--I'd given up. - You--you got it.

- Sean and nicole have made it to the mud.

They're the first team taking the lead,

Bryce and katelyn right behind them.

It is anybody's game in the gauntlet.

- It's a real horse race here at the messy mile.

["call to post" plays]

- Stay on this side. - And they're off.

Are you--are you taking bets? - Oh, you know it.

♪ ♪

- Here we go. Sean and nicole scaling mount wipeout.

Katelyn and bryce right behind them.

- The soaring siblings take the first leap

Off of mount wipeout.

They were third in the qualifier

But first into the pummel pool.

- Checking in with the former frenemies.

- Come on, betty. 25k.

[quirky suspenseful music]

- [groans]

- Great way for them to become enemies again

Is for her to lose them $25,000.

- Katelyn attempts the tippy table,

One of the most feared parts of the course

For reasons you can see here.

- And here. - And also here.

- And don't forget here. - Oh, how could I?

- And finally, twinkle toes katelyn makes it across.

- We did it!

[dramatic music]

- Nice, sean. You got it! You got it. Push, push, push!

♪ ♪

- Followed by a volleyball enthusiast, sean.

Way to show that tippy table who's boss, guys.

♪ ♪

- Volleyballer nicole makes it to the first big pink ball.

Can she serve it to the tippy table?

- I couldn't. - Shift your weight.

Shift your weight! - I'm trying! I'm trying!

I'm pulling it back. - Come on! Yes!

- I got you, I got you! - Yes! Yes!

♪ ♪

- Yeah! - Oh, my god.

- Volleyballers have pulled just ahead

Of the soaring sibs.

Who's going to cross the finish line first?

- For now, they've got to decide which delectable

Treat they want to tangle with,

The lollipop or the fry.

- Ow! Okay. - Oh, my gosh.

- Guess they didn't realize

The fries come with a side of shake.

- You got it, bryce.

- I don't wanna do it. - You can do it. Deep breaths.

- Katelyn attempts to motivate her not-so-brave bro.

- You can do it! You can do it! Okay. Flop in the center.

- Yes, brother bryce.

Love to see this sibling support. Yes!

Ooh, feels just like the old days at the racetrack

Before I got banned for feeding the horses candy.

- Meanwhile, green team taking the lolly for a loop.

- Just take your time. Just stay on it.

- It's tough to stand up. - He's not joking, john.

I once binged season one of "breaking bad" on the toilet.

I was the one who knocked

Because I couldn't get out of the stall.

- Nice. There it is.

- One enormous pink volleyball

Stands between sean and the promised land.

- Yes! - And he does it!

Sean is the first player to cross the finish line.

And katelyn makes the leap and takes a ride on the lollipop.

And her brother joins her on the other side.

- These two better get moving,

Or the ringmaster is going to take away all their peanuts.

I don't know how the circus work.

- Oh, yes! - There it is.

- Like a true aerialist star,

Katelyn does a split as she slides

Into the winner's circle and awaits her big brother.

- I mean, I can do a split, too. Watch.

- Wow. Impressive, nicole.

Too bad we didn't get it on camera.

- You didn't? Oh, well. Next time.

- And soaring bro bryce tries to join his sister and--

Oh, it's a miss.

- Nicole, now you can take your time.

- You can do it. - [shouts]

- It's all right. - That hurt.

- Hey, nicole. Look at me. Give me a hug. We got this.

- He's right.

Nicole has a straight shot to the finish line.

- [sniffles]

It's not fun anymore.

- This is exactly how I feel about watching volleyball.

- Just relax, nicole.

- I'm dying!

- You're all closer to $25,000. You got this, you guys.

- Nicole fights through the tears

And lands on the lollipop.

- And bryce lands on the other side.

These two are neck and neck.

- It's so close. So intense.

- You got it, bryce. You got it! Yes! You got it!

- You got this, nicole. - You're ready.

- Oh, baby! You got it!

Yes! - Oh, my god.

- Yes! - That's right, nicole.

Let the tears fuel your victory.

- Something woke up brother bryce.

Look at the fire in his eyes.

- Bryce, you got it! Go for it! Go for it!

- Oh, my god!

They've both made it to the landing!

And my namesake, nicole, is going for it.

- And she makes it,

Shutting out the soaring siblings,

But only by seconds.

- Wow, wow, wow, wow,

I've been through way too many emotions today.

My therapist is going to charge me double.

- Sean and nicole, congratulations.

You're moving on to the wipeout zone.

John and nicole, I'm going to celebrate with them.

Back to you. [chuckles]

- After a hard-fought victory...

- And many tears. Way too many tears.

- The volleyballers are headed to the wipeout zone.

- And we've got plenty more wipeouts

Ahead in the second heat of the gauntlet

Where we'll find out who will join them in a wipeout zone

For the history books.

This is wild! - No, this is "wipeout."

- It's not "wild 'n out" starring nick cannon?

- It's not. I do get mistaken for nick cannon a lot.

[upbeat music]

[dramatic music]

- John, what would your strategy be at a buffet?

- Pace. It's a marathon, not a sprint.

- I got two words for you. Ziploc bags in your purse.

- Technically, that's cheating, but, I mean, to each their own.

- "wipeout" continues, america,

As we get ready for another three teams

To tackle our body-bending buzzsaw known as the gauntlet.

- The competition is fierce out there, nicole.

- Oh, I know all about competition.

I was a competitive quidditch player in high school.

Atever.

Let's check out what's heating up down at the gauntlet.

- The teams in heat number two are booty flippers...

- The game boy groupies, engaged to play.

- And the starry-eyed rocket scientists.

- [chuckles] - um, adam, we can hear you.

- Congratulations on making it to the gauntlet.

Are you ready? [cheers and applause]

On my count. Three, two, one.

[air horn blares]

- Oh, my god. - Oh, my god.

- Oh, that is higher than it looks, isn't it?

- Well. [clears throat]

- Dude, I'm not ready for this.

♪ ♪

- Rocket scientist melissa launches onto the spinner

And powers through to the first landing.

- Yes, that's my roommate!

- That should be a lesson to us all.

Even a rocket scientist can't afford the rent in la.

- You're crushing it. - Yes.

Melissa's getting the swing of things,

But remember, she can't move on

To the next orbit without her partner.

- I'll meet you there.

♪ ♪

- And adam gets his booty in gear and lands it.

- Yeah!

- Adam grabs the triangle bar and goes for it.

- Ooh, but the sweeper bar has other plans.

- He makes it past.

- But he missed his exit. - Hold on, hold on.

You're almost there.

- He must be from new jersey. - Hey, I'm from new jersey.

And you're correct. We're all terrible drivers.

- Good job, adam. That's it. - I can't do it.

- No. Adam. - Sorry.

- Oh, no.

Looks like booty flipper adam is calling it quits.

- And fellow booty flipper alyssa takes her final bow.

- Oh, we'll miss you two.

- Best of luck with your booty-flipping future.

And with one team out of the running,

Emily jumps in front of engaged to play

And rides that carous-hell like a rocket.

- She has long legs.

How am I supposed to wrap my little legs around it?

- Jermaine and vanessa power up with a smooch

Before they take on this level.

- If I die, I love you.

♪ ♪

- That kiss didn't bring 'em much luck.

- This is when I usually throw the controller out the window.

- Oh!

- Emily is getting bounced around the course

Like a meteor.

Do meteors bounce?

But now the rocket scientists are blasting off

To the next stop of the course.

- Emily and melissa taking the lead.

- Jermaine of engaged to play

Finally decides to commit to taking the first drop.

[upbeat sound effect]

- And he makes it to level one.

- Whoo!

- Okay. - Whoo!

- We can catch up.

You got this, baby. You got this.

- I don't got this.

- Finally, someone's being honest.

♪ ♪

- [shouts]

♪ ♪

- Rocket scientists are preparing to plant their flag

On the top of mount wipeout.

- I'm going to move to the far side,

And then you can have that side

'cause the water's stronger in the middle.

- Oh, that's true.

- Look at the brainiacs hypothesizing how to hike up

Mount wipeout. Oh, so cute.

- Gotta give 'em an a for effort.

- Emily and melissa scaling mount wipeout, baby.

They say the gauntlet isn't rocket science,

But I think it is.

- From a team who works with rockets

To one whose only experience

Is fighting against team rocket.

- I can't, I can't.

I'm so scared.

- Meanwhile, our video gamers are stuck on level one.

- I'm better on a video game than I am on a physical course.

Why did you sign us up for this?

This was a bad idea.

- Signing up for something that might be a disaster?

Yeah, that sounds like marriage.

- Meanwhile, the rocket scientists

Have blasted off to the top of the platform

And are prepared to take on the pink ball.

- Rocket scientists, prepare for takeoff.

To infinity and be--be--

Be careful.

[dramatic music]

Beyond!

So close.

Houston, we have a problem.

- Rocket scientist melissa in pink

Makes a second attempt at the pink ball.

- And the "eagle" has landed.

- Jump over that planet!

It's just a sample return mission.

[laughter]

- I get it!

Yeah, sample return! I love science jokes.

- No, you don't. - You're right.

There is no place for science in comedy.

- Back at the carous-hell with our game-loving lovers.

- I hate this so much. I hate this, I hate this.

- They're still splashing over there 'cause you got this.

Come on. [video game sound effects]

Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on,

Come on, come on!

[downbeat sound effect]

- Try to get towards the center if you can.

- Up in the pummel pool,

Melissa's chosen the lollipop, and she makes it.

- Yes, yes!

Shimmy, shimmy, shimmy. I'll go try french fries.

- Okay. - And if I fall, it's fine.

Let's just see what happens.

- Emily propels herself into the fries.

- Good, good.

- Using her powers of gravity and inertia,

She shuttles through the fries successfully.

And with melissa hot on her trail

And no other team in sight,

Emily makes it off the lollipop.

- Oh, nice.

- And the rocket scientists have made it

To each other's orbit.

- Got it! Whoo!

Finishing strong!

Rocket launch into the finish line!

Look at you go!

- Wow, that win was out of this world.

Those are some supernova smarties.

- Congratulations. You have done

What no rocket scientists have ever done before.

You are going to the wipeout zone, girls.

John and nicole, back to you.

- Rocket scientists emily and melissa

Will be moonwalking into the wipeout zone

Against the volleyballers, sean and nicole.

It's the age-old battle of brains versus brawn

For a grand prize of $25,000.

- It's all going down in the wipeout zone.

- Oh, no!

- "wipeout" fans, sounds simple.

- Sounds very simple. - It's not.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Welcome back to "wipeout." nicole byer here.

- And I'm john "big balls" cena.

- I respect your commitment to "wipeout," john,

But I don't know about that nickname.

- It's too late now, nicole.

I legally changed my middle name to big balls.

- Well, what was it before? - Just balls.

- Well, then I guess that was an improvement.

We've got two teams ready to compete in the wipeout zone

With $25,000 on the line. Let's go there now.

- The first team member will get shot out

From a speeding silver bullet

Into freezing cold waters below.

- From there, they'll swim to the giant spinning vertigo,

Where they'll attempt to maneuver from peg to peg

Without losing their grip or their lunch.

They'll need to press the button in the middle

To lower the bridge before they can leap to safety.

- That's when they'll tag their partner

To take on the leap of faith,

Where they'll have to launch themselves

Onto one of the spinning arms, maintain their balance,

And jump to the narrow platform on the other side.

- It's tough, but if they successfully make it across,

They'll arrive at the final challenge.

- The triple threat. - If a contestant can somehow

Make it from one spinning hexagon

To the next and safely leap to the final platform

Faster than their competition, they'll take home $25,000.

- In tonight's wipeout zone, it's brainiacs,

The rocket scientists, versus

Ready to spike it all, the volleyballers.

- Emily's teammate, melissa has been hurt,

So, due to this special circumstance,

Both teams will have to run the wipeout zone

With just one contestant.

- All systems are go for launch.

- The rocket scientists were only 7 seconds

Behind the volleyballers in the qualifiers,

So this wipeout zone should be interesting

With equally-matched competitors.

♪ ♪

- Three, two, one.

[heart pounding]

- Here she goes.

- Ooh! - Face first. [chuckles]

- Oh, my god. - And we're off.

Emily launched from the silver bullet into the water,

And as you can see,

There is no one on the platform at the leap of faith.

That's because emily's partner, melissa, is injured.

Emily, in an unprecedented move,

Has chosen to run the "wipeout" course herself.

- Whoa.

- And in doing so, the team they're competing against,

Nicole and sean, they've agreed

That it's going to be a one-on-one wipeout zone.

It is going to be emily versus sean.

- Whoa, this is wild! - No, this is "wipeout."

- Oh. - "wild" is another show.

- It's not "wild 'n out" starring nick cannon?

- It's not. It's "wipeout." - I see.

- I do get mistaken for nick cannon a lot, though.

- All right - go tap that button.

- Emily eyeing up the vertigo and makes her leap.

- Okay. - Here she goes. She's on.

- Now we've seen this truly eat competitors alive.

They've been completely exhausted

When they get off of it. - There you go.

- Although emily makes a quick work of it.

She gets to the middle.

That brings a ramp down on the other side,

Which means she can now safely pass the obstacle.

- Hang on! - Hang on and ride it around.

Make your way to that outer blue.

- It seems like this would be easy here,

But this is really the toughest part of vertigo.

As you can see, she sets herself up for the jump.

Just when you get disoriented, she's hanging on.

- Wow, a tough competitor, I see.

- Oh, no. - Oh!

- Not only has got to go for a swim,

But after that, the leap of faith

And after that, the triple threat.

- Honestly, john, that's too much.

- Yeah, this is official.

It's the hardest wipeout zone in the history of "wipeout."

- Yeah. - Take two.

- Being extra cautious now... - Mm-hmm.

- She's going to go.

She's not--no, she's not gonna go. She's going for it.

- Emily's a rocket scientist, so she's probably doing

A bunch of "beautiful mind"- style equations

In her head right now.

- She's just calculating her trajectory right now.

- Yes.

- You got it, em. Keep going.

- She might--ooh. - She's going upside down.

[laughter]

- Ooh, wow. Oh, wow.

- In the rocket science world, that's what we call not good.

- She's like a little spider out there in a web.

- Just holding on. - Ooh.

- You got it, em. - She could be setting.

Ooh, she could be setting to make it.

She's in a good spot. - Yes!

- And she holds on! [cheers and applause]

- Yes. - Emily, great job!

- There we go, em! - Yeah, that's great!

- Oh, that's fast. - I'll give you a countdown.

- No pressure. - Three, two, one, go.

♪ ♪

- Ooh.

♪ ♪

- I'm no rocket scientist, nicole,

But I know that that hurt.

- It had to have hurt.

- Ooh, god. That is a tall ladder.

- Yeah.

- I think fatigue is taking its toll.

- I mean, I would be exhausted.

- Think you gotta land on your knees,

Not on your feet.

- Okay, so I read a study that said when you put

Your hands on your hips like that,

It makes you feel more dominant.

- Scientist talk.

- Well, let's see if she dominates

The leap of faith if the double teapots posture works.

- Uh-huh.

- You got it. - Three, two, one, go.

- She jumps and she holds on. Simply a jump to the platform.

Wow. She's made the leap of faith, and she hangs on.

- Yes. - Wow, that was impressive.

- Great communication there. - I think that's pretty good.

- That is one giant leap for womankind.

- Uh-huh. I think--

- Emily, fantastic job.

Just the triple threat and you're done.

- I know you're tuckered out, but, like, you have to finish.

- Now, in the triple threat,

All of these objects move at the same time.

- Yes.

- Leap onto each one, and then leap to the finish platform.

Once again, "wipeout" fans, sounds simple.

- Sounds very--

- It's not. - No.

- Keep going. Yes, yes, yes.

- So, emily's a scientist, so this is her hypothesis.

- Yes.

- It's now turned into a theory.

- Yes. - And the last obstacle.

Can she turn it into a fact? She's got a chance.

And she makes it.

Wow, take a second and then crush the course.

Emily, fantastic job.

- I did it. Oh, my god!

- First to do it by yourself. Congratulations.

- That's awesome. - What feels better?

Sending something to mars or this?

- Oh, god, my boss would be so mad if I said this,

But this was pretty great. [laughter]

- Excellent! Screw your boss!

- You did great. - That was awesome.

- Thanks, guys.

- First person to ever do it by themselves.

- Yeah. - Wow.

Monumental. Thanks.

- Rocket scientists finish with a time

Of 10 minutes and 25 seconds. Very impressive.

Will sean of the volleyballers be able to beat emily's time?

- I can't predict the future, john.

We'll have to see what happens next in the wipeout zone.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

- And we're back, coming to you live.

- Well, we're not actually live, john.

- Oh, my god. What happens? Is this is heaven?

- It's the wipeout zone. - Oh, so it's the other place.

Wow. A lot colder and wetter than I imagined.

- Let's take a look at the leaderboard.

- Emily of the rocket scientists

Had an impressive solo run

- Sean sounds pumped.

Like emily, he'll be running the entire course himself

As his teammate, nicole, watches from the sidelines...

- Let's go, sean!

- Along with his competition, the rocket scientists.

- [laughs]

♪ ♪

- This is the second wipeout zone tonight

And will determine our winner.

♪ ♪

- Three, two, one.

- Yes!

- Sean launched off of the silver bullet

Into lake wipeout. [cheers and applause]

- I really like the way sean landed.

- All of sean landed. - Oh, boy.

Like an embodiment of splat. Oh, I loved it.

- This is an unprecedented one-on-one wipeout zone.

Sean will run the entire course.

- Here goes nothing.

- Sean immediately wasting no time.

- Yes! Wow. - He's got a stick in vertigo

Like sand in a volleyball player's speedo.

- Oh. Wow, wow, wow. - [panting]

- Nice job. Deep breath, deep breath.

- Uh-oh, uh-oh. - Oh, boy.

- I think he's gonna attempt

At hitting the button in the middle?

- [laughing] - you got it!

Nice and easy! - Oh, boy!

- He's--he's got it. He's got it.

Safely hits the button. The ramp is down.

- Stay there. Just wait till it comes around.

- Wow, nicole, you sure look dry and cozy,

Yelling ideas from the sidelines.

- Okay.

♪ ♪

Okay, that didn't work. Plan b.

- The scientist, emily, that went before him,

She used a lot of tactics.

- She did. - Every move meant something.

- Yes, yes.

A lot of hypothesis, a lot of pythagorean theorems.

A lot of right angles and left angles.

Wait, is there a left angle? No. Oh, boy.

Whoa! - And...

♪ ♪

- Sorry.

- That was a good one, though.

I really liked the way sean flopped.

- That's the dangle angle.

- It's very much a dangle angle.

- Doing a backstroke in that freezing,

Freezing cold lake wipeout, - ooh, chill lake.

- Which is 2,000 feet deep.

- Take your time. You're doing great.

♪ ♪

- Uh-huh. Ooh, ooh.

- He split like a human starfish.

- Oh, boy. Oh, no.

- We've seen this before. - I don't know if we've seen

Someone use their head this way.

- This is part of the plan. - Yeah?

- Part of the plan. There it is.

- Probably not. I doubt it.

- He's upside down on the ball now.

- Sean looks like more of a pinball than a volleyball

At this point.

- There he goes. - Oh, oh.

- Holy crap.

- I don't think I've seen a man bounce around like that

Since last night.

♪ ♪

- [grunts] - oh, oh, oh.

- Oh, boy.

- Oh, no, this could get bad. It could get bad fast.

- This will get bad. Yes. Oh, dang.

- Let's go, sean.

You're doing awesome. Deep breaths.

- Remember, sean's still got two obstacles to go,

And he has to beat the time of 10 minutes

And 25 seconds in order to win.

He's in a good spot. - I think so.

- I think he's putting himself

In a position to make the leap.

- Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

- If he can just keep his composure and land safely.

- Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy. His foot is stuck.

- No! [bleep]!

All: Oh!

- So close.

- Did you hear that exclamation?

- No! [bleep]!

- Heard it. Saw it.

Head butted the platform and did a double back flip

Into the drink, the cold waters of lake wipeout.

♪ ♪

- [sighs] - analyze, analyze.

- Uh-oh, not looking good.

- Oh, he just walked on it. Oh, oh, oh, he's--oh.

- Turn around, turn around.

- I can't. [bleep]! - Oh, boy.

Oh, it's like he fell for five minutes.

- Yeah. - Wow!

[air horn blares]

- The sound of that on horn means sean has timed out.

[cheering]

Emily, melissa, you have won "wipeout" and $25,000!

- Whoo! Congratulations, you guys.

First ever to complete the course all on your own.

Whoo! Champions in the house, baby!

- The only one to complete it

On her own. - Yes, yes.

- Emily and melissa truly made history today

And planted their flag on planet wipeout.

Congratulations, rocket scientists.

- Next week, a whole new batch of crazy contestants

Will take on the course and compete for a $25,000 prize.

Until then, for john cena and camille kostek,

I'm nicole byer, saying good night and big balls.