All language subtitles for The Elegant Gentlemans s01e05

Take some notes here, son. I'm falling
about like the devil's ball. I'm a

stranger bomb in the middle of the gate
in a strange hotel.

And let me tell you that man with a
trench coat and he'll take you downtown.

Nasty and in the corner street. He's an
animal and I'm a bag of blood.

We shouldn't be doing this. I know but
you're so goddamn sexy.

You don't even know who I am.

Isn't that what makes it so exciting?
You know, and you seem so familiar.

Really? Yeah, I feel like we've met
before, have we?

Well, I get that all the time.

I used to do a little bit of modelling,
so you might have recognised me from

that. What have you done?

Well, you know the photographs on the
packets of cigarettes, the one with the

really foul foot and the gangrene
infection?

That's me.

Wow. Yes.

That's me. That's you.

Hang on a second. That's crazy because
I've got the... Oh, wow. You see, when I

saw you before in the pool and I saw
your foot with the blood and the pus and

the gangrene and the stench, I thought
to myself, that looks really familiar,

but I couldn't place it. You're famous.

Oh, yeah. You're pretty special
yourself.

In the name of the Father, the Son, and
the Holy Spirit, we commit the soul of

John Barrington Yersey unto thee, my
Lord.

that he may repent his sins and find
eternal salvation in heaven.

Through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

Amen.

Prepare the prisoner for execution.

Oh.

Sorry, I almost forgot.

Would you like to choose the carbon
offset option for your execution?

Sorry?

Execution by electric chair takes a lot
of energy. It amounts to an emission of

about one carbon tonne. By ticking that
box, you can offset the emissions.

Well, what do most people do?

Most people do it.

Yeah, most people do it.

It's only an extra ten bucks.

You want me to pay for my own execution?

And help create a more sustainable
future.

Sustainable future?

You're about to kill me.

Well, for other people.

What do I get?

We plant a tree. What kind of tree?

Do you know what kind?

Nice one.

Oh, definitely a nice one.

Yeah, they don't skimp. You'd like it.

Would you say that you're concerned
about your planet in general?

Not at this very moment. If you were, we
do offer... Caleb, could you bring in

the... We do offer another alternative.

It's a wind -powered execution.

Much greener option.

And why don't you use it all the time?

Oh, well, it has its pros and cons.

It's definitely greener, but it takes a
bit longer.

How long?

14 days. 14 days? 15 tops.

We give you books and magazines to park
the time.

Free Bible.

But it's definitely greener. Oh, yeah,
incredibly green. Definitely, yeah.

What?

All right, sure, let's go with that
then, yeah?

Brothers, it is Allah's will that after
five intensive years of training and

three years of planning, we are finally
ready to carry out our plot.

For we are all committed soldiers in
this war.

And by Allah's will, the date that has
been chosen...

For this holy jihad is next Tuesday,
July 12th.

Yeah, that's actually not ideal for me.
I promised the ex that I'd pick up the

kids from school that day.

I'd probably do the evening.

I can't do evenings throughout that
whole month. I'm in a community theatre

show, My Fair Lady.

My Fair Lady?

Yeah. I'm one of the second late, so
it'll be poor form to pull out.

All right, fine.

How's everyone looking for August then?
Oh, now you're just getting into the ski

season, aren't you?

I've already put a deposit on a ski
chalet.

Ski chalet?

Yeah, well, I've never seen a snow
before, so... I can do late August,

Late August, then. Late August.

Let's have a look.

Shall we say... August 24th. Duh!

What? No good?

No, it's the season finale of Breaking
Bad.

I've been watching the whole series. I
don't want to miss the finale.

Can't you download it in advance?

What? Yeah, but that's the US on air
date, so not until 3pm. And

you can't actually download the time
until about 4 or 5.

And I've only got a dongle, so it's
going to take longer.

My mum and dad have got broadband, so
I'll just download it at their joint and

put it on a USB stick for you. Can I get
Homeland off you? You haven't seen

Homeland? He hasn't even seen the wire
yet.

What? I tried. I downloaded the first
step, but I can't understand what

saying.

You've got to give it more than that.

Brothers, please.

Let's all just focus on their purpose
here.

Are we committed with jihad or aren't
we?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

We are soldiers of Allah.

In a war against Western decadence, this
is our time to rise up in jihad.

So let us please hear no more about ski
chalets or Breaking Bad or USB dongle.

Yeah. Yeah.

You feeling anything?

Not really, no.

Not even a slight sense of
electrocution?

Sorry. Okay, Caleb, stop. Stop it.

Just quietly.

The family of the woman that you
murdered in the viewing area, as you can

are getting a little impatient.

They want us to hurry things up.

Hey.

Oh, we might just have to go back to
plan A, if that's okay with you.

Why don't we just...

Take the chair outside.

What are you talking about?

Well, I was thinking that maybe the
problem is that there's not enough wind

here to power the turbine.

Not exactly a drafty room.

But if we took the chair out onto an
open plane, probably get the job done in

next to no time.

Yeah.

Might be something in there. Yeah, I
like that. I really like that.

Actually,

it's much windier. I think that's going
to do the trick. That was a great

suggestion.

Where's he gone?

There he is.

Oh, crap.

That didn't work out well at all, did
it?

Come back.

Lawrence, I love you. I miss you so
much.

For fuck's sake, Helena.

Which part of till death do us part is
giving you so much trouble?

Martin, come in. Thank you.

How's the farewell going?

Yeah, good, very well. Pete's very happy
and the cake was very nice.

Oh, any left?

A little bit, yeah.

Good, I'll pop over soon.

Yeah, and I'd be sad to see Pete go.
He's very, um, very dedicated.

Yes, well, you have to be. It's a tough
job. Yeah, absolutely, no doubt. The

hours he puts in, I'm not sure if he
sleeps.

I wouldn't do that job for all the tea
in China.

Actually, that's what I want to talk to
you about.

Why don't you take a seat?

Sure.

Look, Martin, I've been very impressed
with your work the last six months.

That's why I'd like to offer you Pete's
old job.

Oh, my God!

I can't believe... That's right, and the
pay packet.

is China's annual tea production.

Oh, uh... Add some in there.

You want to pay me in tea?

Yes.

You'll receive all the tea in China per
annum.

How much is that?

About 1 .4 million tonnes.

What are we going to do with that?

Sell it, I should think.

Sell it? Who am I going to... Sorry, who
am I going to sell it to?

I did that with the Chinese.

Did you pay Pete in tea?

No. We paid him in pork.

Would he be happy with that?

Not overly.

I think that's why he's leaving.

Thank you very much for the offer.

I feel like I maybe still have things I
need to accomplish in my current role,

and if I was going to take on Pete's job
with all the vigour that that requires,

I feel like I would need to be
remunerated financially and not with

products. All right.

Think about this, Martin. Any other
firm, you'd be offered $150 ,000? Yeah.

Or you could receive 30 % of the world's
tea production.

Why not just give me the money the
company is spending on the tea?

Did you hear what I just said?

30%. That's more than India and Sri
Lanka combined.

Yes, I heard you. I just don't... I
mean, I'd understand your hesitation if

was offering you all the tea in, say,
Kenya, a paltry 399 ,000 tonnes, but all

the tea in China.

If I'm putting in long hours, how am I
going to sell a significant tonnage of

tea? You don't have to go door to door.

I mean, you employ a management team to
run your global tea empire.

It's basic economic.

I'm sorry, if the salary is tea, I am
going to have to decline the promotion.

Then you're fired.

What? If you're not progressing, I'm
going to have to let you go. You can't

that. I need movers and shakers in this
company, Martin.

Not the kind of person who'd turn down
the chance to build a local tea

Yeah. It's move up or move out, I'm
afraid.

Okay, I'll take it.

For all the tea in China?

Yeah. For all the tea in China.

Excellent. I'll call HR and let them
know.

Congratulations.

Yeah.

Thanks. I'd better go organise some
warehousing stuff.

Start learning Cantonese, I guess.

Yeah, you do that.

Oh, and send in Daisy on your way out,
please.

Yeah. Thanks.

Ah, Daisy.

Hi, Bob.

Saved you a piece of cake. Oh,
fantastic.

Um, Mum seemed a bit dejected.

I just offered him Pete's old job.

Oh, really?

I think you'd be a bit happier. I mean,
Mum's job is very important, but, you

know. Very thankless.

I mean, I wouldn't do it for a small
Greek island, a flotilla of luxury

and a threesome with Brad Pitt and Ryan
Gosling.

Actually, that's what I want to talk to
you about. Take a seat.

OK, it's looking pretty good.

Now, have you decided?

Would you like to know what you're
having?

Yeah, why not?

Okay, let's have a look.

Oh, okay.

What's the matter?

I really think your doctor should
probably talk to you about this.

Oh, no, whatever it is, we want to know
now.

What is it?

What's wrong with our little boy?

He's...

A dickhead.

So you can see here, he's going to be a
pretty massive

dickhead.

It could be worse. He could be a
fuckwit.

Look, I can actually, I can give you a
pamphlet on it at the moment. There's a

lot you can do to manage it these days.

I'm so sorry.

Sweetheart. Look, it's often hardest on
the dads.

I had a woman come in earlier today and
she's going to have twin skanky bitches.

I mean, can you imagine?

I'm in favour of getting our troops out
of Iraq, but I'm against bringing them

home.

Are you all right with the exit road,
sir?

Yes, yes, perfect.

Good leg room.

Oh, that's interesting.

Is everything okay?

It looks like we've actually overbooked
economy on this life.

So what I'm going to do is I'm going to
upgrade you both to business class.

Okay. Business class.

I'm in my business class as well.

Sweet. Eddie.

Yeah, is this all three of us?

Sorry, sir, just these two. Thank you.
Oh, sorry, sir, just these two.

Business class. Next please.

Man, these are the comfiest seats I've
ever, ever sat in.

So what?

Wait.

Hey, it's got 20 past. We've got to do
this in five minutes.

Can you make it 10? I've nearly finished
this episode.

Sean, we have to do this.

Yeah, I know. We will do this.

Modern family.

I'm nearly finished. Yeah, it's a really
funny episode.

Yeah, it's really good. Hey, please.

All right?

Settle down.

Hey, I can't hear you because these are
noise -cancelling headphones.

Have you got these in economy?

They're amazing.

You should check out the menu, too.
There's six different items to choose

It's incredible. The chairs go up. Ow!

Good things to do.

More champagne here?

Oh, yes, please.

No. No, she's fine. No, no, no, no. I
said yes. I said yes, please.

Um, no, because we don't drink, do we?

Um, I'm sorry, sir, but I'm going to
have to ask you to go back to your seat.

Like, now.

Four minutes.

Four minutes.

Now, can I interest you two in some
complimentary eye masks or slippers for

sleep this evening? Yes, that'd be
amazing.

Yes, please. And can you also fix my
iPad?

Slow. Oh, I'll be out of juice.

Let me fix that for you.

Sure can.

Can I get another pillow, please?

Yes, certainly. Thank you.

Hello? It's me. What happened?

Um... Yeah, I might put Sean on the
phone, if that's all right.

Oh, fuck.

Hello? Where are you?

We're in New York.

What do you mean, you're in New York?

Um, we... we had a slight complication.

What kind of complication?

We got an upgrade.

Oh, don't say that. An upgrade?

Yeah, to business classes.

What?

We're fired.

He doesn't want to work with Aussies.
What?

Good, that guy's a dickhead anyway.

Over it. Hey, let's go see the Lion
King.

Yes! Yeah, that sounds nice.

Yeah.

But it's his 21st.

G'day, boys. Hey.

G'day, mate. How are you?

I'm good.

Taro. G'day, Taro. How are you? Great.
Good. You must be the flatmate.

The flatmate?

Us two.

Is it?

I thought you said... No, I didn't say
flatmate.

Oh.

Do you want a beer, Greg?

Yeah. Hang on. Yeah, that'd be good.
What did you say?

Uh, nothing. I don't know.

Well, maybe you said something that
sounded like flatmate, like, um,

fatmate.

Is that what you said? You said, come
and see my...

Fat, mate?

Yep.

But I said, come and see my fat, comma.

Mate?

What do you mean, fat?

You brought it down here to look at your
dick.

Erection.

Well, come on then.

Let's see it.

Let's see the fat man get it out. It's
gone down.

Michael is a big fat bum head.

I know the line's not really saying
that.

Hey, what the hell's going on? Officer
Rampage, what's it look like?

That was my idea, dickhead. Yeah, well,
I was here first.

Gives you the right, did it? You're a
temp.

Yeah? Do you know how much photocopying
I've done since I've been here? Tons?

Spencer account nearly killed me. And
Rick wanted it bound, not stapled.

Binding? I've been overlooked for every
major promotion for the past ten years.

Yeah, well, I hate binding.

Oh, Peter.

Peter was on my list, man.

What list?

I don't know. It's okay. It's just my...
What the fuck? That was Mark.

He's never done anything to anyone.

Yeah, well, he could have.

All right.

My list.

Vijay. Uh, he's not in today.

What? Yeah, he called in sick.

Okay.

All right.

Sorry. Clean up?

No, Doris from Accounts. Oh, man,
Accounts is on fire.

Everyone's dead?

I guess so, but...

I hate binding.

Who the hell are you?

I'm the new girl.

Would you

like a

coffee or a tea? No, thanks. I think I'd
just like to get on with it.

Laurie, I'll have a ristretto, please.

Are you sure?

Oh, okay. A flat white with one. And a
flat white with one, please.

Oh, and cancel the restrainer.

I'm sure you're eager to meet Mbantu.

Is that his name?

Mbantu. Is Mbantu okay?

Mbantu's great.

There is just a small matter of the
final payment. Oh, God, I'm so sorry.

Sorry to be direct. No, no, no, no. I
should have brought it up. I was just

putting it in my wallet this morning.

There you go.

All right, Mr Branforth. By the power
vested in me by the government, I would

like to introduce you to your legally
adopted son, Mabantu.

No,

no. This... This isn't from Uganda.

From where?

Uganda.

I thought you said Annandale.

Uh, I clearly said, more than once,
Uganda.

Says here Annandale.

No, that's my address. I live in
Annandale.

Oh, really? Because that's where
Mavento's from.

You guys got a lot in common. Sorry,
there's been some mistake.

I haven't adopted this man.

Yes, you have. No, I fucking haven't.
Don't you want me?

That's not the point, mate.

Mbantu.

Mbantu?

You're not what I paid for.

So you like me?

That's not really the issue.

What, you don't like it? Why don't you
like me, Daddy?

You're not my son.

You need to stay calm. No, I'm calm. You
know as well as I do. I have paid good

money for a small child from Uganda,
Africa.

Well, you can choose your friends.

But you can't choose your family. You
can if you pay $48 ,000 for them.

I'm sorry I had to hear that, Laurie.

I'm sorry.

I'll get you a bit of this.

Now you've upset the baby.

It's all right, hey.

Can he stop that, please? You might if
you put him on the boot.

What?

This way, mate. Easy.

Careful.

Nothing's coming.

What do you expect? I'm not his father.

This is sick.

I want you to accept your son.

Excuse me. Hi, Steph.

We asked earlier if it might be possible
for Joshua here to maybe go up and feed

the cockpit.

Right.

Very thin planes.

Well, now's probably not such a great
time.

Please, it would really mean a lot to
him, and you won't be any trouble, will

you, Josh?

It is his birthday, so... Um...

All right. Very quickly, though, and you
have to promise to stay out of the way,

okay? It's a little bit hectic up there.
Be good.

All right.

This is Joshua. He just wanted to come
and see the cockpit.

Help!

He won't be any trouble. He just don't.

Is it okay if he stands and watches? Are
you being serious? No, get out!

It's just he's very interested in
planes.

And it's his birthday.

Move the kid over here.

I said move over here!

Watch your step, sweetheart.

What are you doing?

This is your first time on the cockpit,
kid? Huh?

I would too.

What happened to them?

Travel sickness.

So you want to learn how to fly planes,
huh?

Okay, come here.

I'm here. Sit here.

Good.

What is this thing? That's the landing
gear. Don't worry about it. Don't be

needing that.

What is this thing?

How the hell would I know what that
does? Do I look like I went to pilot

Take it easy.

Let's just, you know, show him some of
the best things.

What? The kid's interested in planes,
okay? It's his birthday.

No.

See this control stick I'm holding?

This is what I use to steer the
aircraft.

Want to hold it? Hold it.

Easy, easy. Easy does it. Easy does it.
Be careful, good boy.

Look at that.

That's great.

You're flying the plane all by yourself.

He's flying the plane all by himself.

Good, good, good.

Do you see that stadium over there?

If you just go straight...

into that stadium, that would be great.

The kids are natural.

Want to be a pilot when you grow up?

Shame.

Maybe in the next life, huh?

Maybe in the next life!

Allah!

And I'm taking out the land on my
landing strip. But when you're big, this

like writing those things like a lie.
That man is an animal.

That dude ain't right.

That man is an animal.

That blood sucker ain't right.

That man is a...