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1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
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2
00:00:29,905 --> 00:00:32,365
This is so beautiful.
3
00:00:33,450 --> 00:00:35,451
WYATT: You know it, Gary.
4
00:00:36,662 --> 00:00:38,079
Look at her.
5
00:00:45,963 --> 00:00:48,548
Do you know what I
would like to do?
6
00:00:48,632 --> 00:00:50,550
Shower with them.
7
00:00:51,009 --> 00:00:55,138
Then bang!
We hit the city,
baby, dead on.
8
00:00:56,348 --> 00:01:00,226
For little drinks,
a little nightlife,
a little dancing.
9
00:01:00,310 --> 00:01:01,352
Dancing.
10
00:01:01,437 --> 00:01:04,522
We throw a huge party,
I mean, huge party.
11
00:01:04,606 --> 00:01:08,568
Everybody's invited,
women everywhere.
12
00:01:08,652 --> 00:01:11,821
All these girls,
they're all there.
13
00:01:11,905 --> 00:01:14,198
Naked bodies everywhere.
Gary.
14
00:01:14,283 --> 00:01:15,742
They all know my name.
Gary.
15
00:01:15,826 --> 00:01:16,868
What?
16
00:01:16,952 --> 00:01:19,996
Nobody likes us. Nobody.
17
00:01:21,123 --> 00:01:23,624
Why are you messing
with the fantasy?
18
00:01:24,126 --> 00:01:26,043
We know about the reality.
19
00:01:26,128 --> 00:01:28,337
Don't ruin the fantasy, okay?
20
00:01:29,840 --> 00:01:32,258
And then, we're a hit, man.
21
00:01:32,342 --> 00:01:34,427
We're popular. We're revered.
22
00:01:34,511 --> 00:01:36,888
Man, we're studs.
23
00:01:36,972 --> 00:01:38,973
(SNIGGERS)
24
00:01:39,057 --> 00:01:42,185
When the smoke clears, right,
25
00:01:44,271 --> 00:01:46,355
those two dames
26
00:01:46,440 --> 00:01:50,985
fall amazingly, completely
and totally in love
with us, Wyatt.
27
00:01:52,404 --> 00:01:53,863
Check it out.
28
00:01:56,492 --> 00:01:58,493
IAN: Yo! Check this out.
29
00:01:59,036 --> 00:02:02,038
(HEART POUNDING)
30
00:02:17,513 --> 00:02:20,097
Look, we're sorry about...
31
00:02:23,894 --> 00:02:27,605
(POP MUSIC PLAYING)
32
00:03:46,476 --> 00:03:48,561
MAN ON TV:
His insane ambition
to create life.
33
00:03:49,146 --> 00:03:50,897
Where'd your
parents go, anyway?
34
00:03:50,981 --> 00:03:52,523
Cincinnati.
35
00:03:52,608 --> 00:03:55,026
They're meeting the guy
that my sister
wants to marry.
36
00:03:56,236 --> 00:03:59,280
Chloe? Who the hell
would marry Chloe?
37
00:03:59,698 --> 00:04:01,699
He's studying to be a vet.
38
00:04:03,076 --> 00:04:04,577
WYATT: Try not to make
a mess in there, Gary.
39
00:04:04,661 --> 00:04:06,245
The maid doesn't
come till Monday.
40
00:04:06,330 --> 00:04:07,413
You know, I don't
understand something, Wyatt.
41
00:04:07,497 --> 00:04:09,248
How come all of a sudden
your parents trust you, man?
42
00:04:09,333 --> 00:04:11,083
They never let
you do shit before.
43
00:04:11,168 --> 00:04:12,460
Chet's coming
home from college
44
00:04:12,544 --> 00:04:14,337
for the weekend.
They trust him.
45
00:04:14,421 --> 00:04:15,922
He's in charge.
46
00:04:16,006 --> 00:04:18,466
GARY: Chet? Shit!
47
00:04:19,343 --> 00:04:21,260
You know,
I can't believe this, Wyatt.
48
00:04:21,345 --> 00:04:23,179
I really wish
that you told me this
49
00:04:23,263 --> 00:04:24,555
before I agreed
to sleep over.
50
00:04:24,640 --> 00:04:26,349
You know how I
feel about Chet.
51
00:04:26,433 --> 00:04:27,892
GARY: I mean, how do you
put up with that guy?
52
00:04:27,976 --> 00:04:30,186
If I don't,
he beats the shit out of me.
53
00:04:30,270 --> 00:04:32,229
It's a habit he picked
up in military school.
54
00:04:32,314 --> 00:04:33,481
GARY: I mean, how do you
put up with that putz?
55
00:04:33,565 --> 00:04:36,484
WYATT: What can I say, Gary?
He's very protective of me.
56
00:04:36,568 --> 00:04:38,235
Nice relationship.
57
00:04:38,445 --> 00:04:41,197
MAN ON TV:
There you have his mad dream.
58
00:04:43,533 --> 00:04:47,036
Look!
There's nothing to fear.
59
00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:53,376
Look, no blood, no decay,
just a few stitches.
60
00:04:53,460 --> 00:04:55,795
Go on. Fix the electrodes.
61
00:04:55,879 --> 00:04:58,923
You'll have
plenty to be afraid of
before the night's over.
62
00:04:59,007 --> 00:05:01,592
The storm will
be magnificent.
63
00:05:01,677 --> 00:05:04,595
All the electrical
secrets of heaven.
64
00:05:05,555 --> 00:05:08,224
And this time we're ready.
Hey, Fritz?
65
00:05:08,558 --> 00:05:11,268
Let's have one final test.
Throw the switches.
66
00:05:11,353 --> 00:05:13,396
(THUNDER RUMBLING)
67
00:05:15,565 --> 00:05:19,276
Here in this machine,
I have discovered
the great ray
68
00:05:19,361 --> 00:05:22,363
that first brought
life into the world.
69
00:05:22,447 --> 00:05:24,949
And, look,
here's the final touch.
70
00:05:27,786 --> 00:05:31,455
The brain you stole, Fritz.
Think of it.
71
00:05:31,540 --> 00:05:36,127
The brain of a dead man
waiting to live again
in a body I made
72
00:05:36,211 --> 00:05:38,087
with my own hands.
73
00:05:38,171 --> 00:05:40,339
You know,
that's not a bad idea.
74
00:05:40,424 --> 00:05:41,507
WYATT: What?
75
00:05:41,591 --> 00:05:43,509
In 15 minutes,
the storm should
be at its height.
76
00:05:43,593 --> 00:05:45,094
Making a girl.
77
00:05:48,974 --> 00:05:50,975
Actually making a girl.
78
00:05:52,769 --> 00:05:54,645
Just like Frankenstein,
79
00:05:55,313 --> 00:05:56,564
except cuter.
80
00:05:56,648 --> 00:05:58,357
Nobody must come here!
81
00:05:58,442 --> 00:06:00,443
Don't touch it!
82
00:06:00,527 --> 00:06:02,028
I'm sorry, Doctor.
83
00:06:02,779 --> 00:06:04,321
You're serious.
84
00:06:04,406 --> 00:06:05,656
Yes.
85
00:06:08,493 --> 00:06:10,286
Look me in the eyes.
86
00:06:10,746 --> 00:06:12,288
Do I look serious?
87
00:06:12,664 --> 00:06:13,873
MAN: You're crazy!
88
00:06:13,957 --> 00:06:15,708
Crazy, am I?
89
00:06:15,792 --> 00:06:18,502
We'll see whether
I'm crazy or not.
90
00:06:19,421 --> 00:06:21,672
Gary Wallace,
that's absolutely gross.
91
00:06:21,757 --> 00:06:22,757
That's sick.
92
00:06:22,841 --> 00:06:25,426
I'm not digging up
dead girls. It's...
93
00:06:28,096 --> 00:06:31,849
No, I'm not
talking about digging up
a dead girl, Wyatt.
94
00:06:31,975 --> 00:06:33,100
I'm talking about
your system, idiot.
95
00:06:33,185 --> 00:06:34,685
Your computer.
96
00:06:35,771 --> 00:06:37,021
Okay, look,
you know how you're
always talking about
97
00:06:37,105 --> 00:06:40,900
how you can simulate
all that stuff on
your computer? You know?
98
00:06:40,984 --> 00:06:43,903
What's the difference?
Why can't we simulate a girl?
99
00:06:43,987 --> 00:06:47,114
I don't know.
I guess I could, but why?
100
00:06:47,199 --> 00:06:48,908
It's two-dimensional
on the screen.
101
00:06:48,992 --> 00:06:50,951
It's not flesh
and blood, Gary.
102
00:06:51,036 --> 00:06:53,120
I know that, but, you know,
we can use it, Wyatt.
103
00:06:53,205 --> 00:06:54,246
We can ask it questions.
104
00:06:54,331 --> 00:06:57,583
We can put it in
real-life sexual situations
and see how it reacts.
105
00:06:57,667 --> 00:07:00,377
Like real sick,
demented shit.
You'd love it.
106
00:07:00,462 --> 00:07:03,464
Well, what about
your girl in Canada?
107
00:07:05,050 --> 00:07:06,675
She lives in Canada.
This girl has no morals.
108
00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:08,260
You know,
I don't like that in a girl.
109
00:07:08,345 --> 00:07:10,096
It's rough having
those kind of relationships.
You'll see.
110
00:07:10,180 --> 00:07:11,222
(CLEARING THROAT)
111
00:07:11,306 --> 00:07:12,598
Anyway, get to work.
112
00:07:18,188 --> 00:07:19,522
Very nice.
113
00:07:24,528 --> 00:07:28,114
Hold it, Wyatt. I mean,
if there's one thing I know,
it's female stats.
114
00:07:28,198 --> 00:07:29,782
I mean, anything
bigger than a handful,
115
00:07:29,866 --> 00:07:31,117
you're risking
a sprained tongue.
116
00:07:31,201 --> 00:07:32,701
You know, and...
117
00:07:33,078 --> 00:07:34,537
Yeah.
Yeah.
118
00:07:36,414 --> 00:07:37,706
Perfect.
119
00:07:38,375 --> 00:07:40,000
Okay. Now what?
120
00:07:41,211 --> 00:07:43,379
Should we give her
a brain?
121
00:07:43,880 --> 00:07:45,631
Yeah.
We can play chess with her.
122
00:07:45,715 --> 00:07:46,882
Chess?
123
00:07:47,509 --> 00:07:49,426
Just give her
a brain, okay?
124
00:07:58,228 --> 00:08:01,772
Okay,
that's about all we can do
with my stuff.
125
00:08:01,857 --> 00:08:05,109
I can't believe this shit.
I can't believe this.
126
00:08:05,193 --> 00:08:07,361
Did you get a free
toaster with this, too?
127
00:08:07,445 --> 00:08:09,780
Gary, it's smarter
than you, okay?
128
00:08:09,865 --> 00:08:12,158
The problem is,
this is a lame idea, okay?
129
00:08:12,242 --> 00:08:14,160
It's not a lame idea.
The problem is
your computer's a wimp
130
00:08:14,244 --> 00:08:15,995
and we need a lot
more power than this.
That's the problem.
131
00:08:16,079 --> 00:08:17,329
What do you suggest?
132
00:08:21,042 --> 00:08:23,085
VOICE: We have code
penetration, we have
program entry.
133
00:08:23,170 --> 00:08:25,921
I repeat, we have
code penetration,
we have program entry.
134
00:08:35,348 --> 00:08:36,932
Activate lang trace.
135
00:08:51,907 --> 00:08:55,409
(SCREAMING)
136
00:09:14,554 --> 00:09:15,888
We're in.
137
00:09:15,972 --> 00:09:17,890
We're in trouble, Gary.
138
00:09:17,974 --> 00:09:20,059
This is highly illegal.
139
00:09:20,143 --> 00:09:23,187
Well, you need more input.
We got to fill this
thing up with data.
140
00:09:23,271 --> 00:09:25,940
We gotta make her
as real as possible, Wyatt.
141
00:09:26,024 --> 00:09:28,817
I want her to live,
I want her to breathe.
142
00:09:29,152 --> 00:09:30,986
I want her to aerobicize.
143
00:10:06,189 --> 00:10:09,191
It's live!
All Dave, all night!
144
00:10:09,651 --> 00:10:15,197
We know what you need
only right here on Dave TV!
145
00:10:16,741 --> 00:10:19,535
Look at this.
It's moving, it's working.
It's doing itself.
146
00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:20,995
It's working by itself.
147
00:10:33,383 --> 00:10:35,592
(CHANTING)
148
00:10:40,807 --> 00:10:42,057
Gary...
149
00:10:42,517 --> 00:10:44,893
(HUMMING)
150
00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:48,063
By the way,
why are we wearing
bras on our heads?
151
00:10:48,815 --> 00:10:50,149
Ceremonial.
152
00:10:58,950 --> 00:11:00,993
You ready?
Yeah.
153
00:11:01,077 --> 00:11:02,369
Let's go.
154
00:11:05,248 --> 00:11:06,248
GARY: Turn it off!
155
00:11:06,333 --> 00:11:07,958
WYATT: It is off!
156
00:11:11,254 --> 00:11:12,463
(ALARM RINGING)
157
00:11:13,089 --> 00:11:14,965
Hang up the phone!
158
00:11:24,809 --> 00:11:25,893
Wyatt, what's going on?
159
00:11:25,977 --> 00:11:27,269
I don't know!
160
00:11:27,354 --> 00:11:28,354
Well, unplug it!
161
00:11:28,438 --> 00:11:29,563
Okay!
162
00:11:33,818 --> 00:11:35,194
Oh, shit!
163
00:11:47,957 --> 00:11:50,334
No! It was a birthday present!
164
00:11:54,631 --> 00:11:56,173
Oh, shit!
165
00:11:58,134 --> 00:11:59,676
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God!
166
00:11:59,761 --> 00:12:01,261
Oh, shit!
167
00:12:01,346 --> 00:12:03,055
We got to get this thing
out of your house!
168
00:12:03,139 --> 00:12:04,723
You get it out!
It was your idea!
169
00:12:04,808 --> 00:12:06,892
This is all your fault!
170
00:12:06,976 --> 00:12:08,102
Hit the lights out!
You get it out!
171
00:12:08,186 --> 00:12:09,311
You get it out!
172
00:12:09,396 --> 00:12:10,979
I'll get it out!
173
00:12:22,909 --> 00:12:25,911
(DOOR CREAKING)
174
00:12:33,461 --> 00:12:36,004
(BOTH EXCLAIMING)
175
00:12:37,090 --> 00:12:38,966
WYATT: Shit!
176
00:13:09,747 --> 00:13:11,582
One, two, three.
177
00:13:14,377 --> 00:13:17,212
She's alive. Alive!
178
00:13:18,715 --> 00:13:20,841
(EXCLAIMING)
179
00:13:23,845 --> 00:13:25,012
So,
180
00:13:25,805 --> 00:13:28,891
what would you little maniacs
like to do first?
181
00:13:33,897 --> 00:13:35,564
You guys created me.
182
00:13:35,648 --> 00:13:37,816
I didn't come from anywhere.
183
00:13:38,318 --> 00:13:40,402
WOMAN: Before you
started messing around
with your computer,
184
00:13:40,487 --> 00:13:42,279
I didn't even exist.
185
00:13:45,074 --> 00:13:46,450
By the way,
186
00:13:47,160 --> 00:13:48,660
you did an excellent job.
187
00:13:48,745 --> 00:13:50,078
Thank you.
188
00:13:54,375 --> 00:13:55,626
Hello?
189
00:13:59,422 --> 00:14:01,590
Showering's real fun,
isn't it?
190
00:14:07,096 --> 00:14:10,265
If we're going to have
any kind of fun together,
191
00:14:11,768 --> 00:14:14,019
you guys had
better loosen up.
192
00:14:20,360 --> 00:14:22,694
What are we
going to do with her?
193
00:14:23,404 --> 00:14:24,530
Look,
194
00:14:25,323 --> 00:14:27,032
we'll just go with
the situation, okay?
195
00:14:27,116 --> 00:14:28,700
And I'm sure by Sunday,
you'll think of something.
196
00:14:28,785 --> 00:14:31,662
You're a very bright guy.
I have a lot of
faith in you, okay?
197
00:14:31,746 --> 00:14:33,038
All right?
198
00:14:33,122 --> 00:14:34,581
I'm just being practical.
199
00:14:34,666 --> 00:14:37,084
Well, I know you are, okay?
And I appreciate it.
200
00:14:37,168 --> 00:14:38,418
Let's go.
201
00:14:39,337 --> 00:14:41,255
What are we going to
do about this mess?
202
00:14:41,339 --> 00:14:44,174
Wyatt,
you'll have plenty of time
to clean up tomorrow, okay?
203
00:14:44,259 --> 00:14:47,844
Okay, but don't get
any b.o. On Chet's suit,
or he'd kill me.
204
00:14:51,266 --> 00:14:52,516
Where are we going, anyway?
205
00:14:52,600 --> 00:14:54,059
I don't know.
She said we're going
to go downtown and...
206
00:14:54,143 --> 00:14:56,562
Oh, my God!
Whose stuff is this?
207
00:14:56,646 --> 00:14:57,813
Is that your suit?
Wait, is this yours?
208
00:14:57,897 --> 00:14:58,897
Oh, shit.
209
00:14:58,982 --> 00:15:00,107
Holy shit.
Gary,
I don't know what's going...
210
00:15:00,191 --> 00:15:01,400
Why? What's going on here?
I don't know.
211
00:15:01,484 --> 00:15:02,901
What is going on here?
Gary, I don't know!
212
00:15:02,986 --> 00:15:04,111
I don't know
what's going on here!
213
00:15:04,195 --> 00:15:05,529
Gary, you look good,
though, all right?
214
00:15:05,613 --> 00:15:06,905
Yeah?
Yeah.
215
00:15:13,746 --> 00:15:15,247
So, did you steal this car?
216
00:15:15,331 --> 00:15:17,416
No, I didn't steal the car.
217
00:15:17,500 --> 00:15:19,167
How'd you get it?
218
00:15:20,211 --> 00:15:22,504
I can get anything I want.
219
00:15:22,589 --> 00:15:24,631
And right now,
I want to party.
220
00:15:24,716 --> 00:15:25,799
Party?
221
00:15:25,883 --> 00:15:29,469
Yeah, and you better think up
a name for me, too.
222
00:15:29,554 --> 00:15:31,430
What name do you want?
223
00:15:31,514 --> 00:15:34,600
You guys created me,
you think of a name for me.
224
00:15:34,684 --> 00:15:36,226
How about Lisa?
225
00:15:36,311 --> 00:15:37,603
Why Lisa?
226
00:15:39,188 --> 00:15:40,439
Why not?
227
00:15:40,982 --> 00:15:43,275
He used to like
a girl named Lisa.
228
00:15:43,359 --> 00:15:45,319
Oh, yeah? Old girlfriend?
229
00:15:45,653 --> 00:15:47,738
She kicked him
in the nuts.
230
00:15:48,948 --> 00:15:50,616
Will you shut up?
231
00:15:51,284 --> 00:15:52,909
Look, Gary,
it wasn't your fault.
232
00:15:52,994 --> 00:15:54,077
All you said
was hello to her.
233
00:15:54,162 --> 00:15:56,246
Yeah, look, Wyatt, shut up!
234
00:15:57,373 --> 00:16:00,000
Hey, guys, I like Lisa.
235
00:16:00,084 --> 00:16:01,335
That'll do just fine.
236
00:16:04,339 --> 00:16:06,548
Okay, you guys
ready to rock?
237
00:16:06,633 --> 00:16:08,300
Ready.
Ready.
238
00:16:08,801 --> 00:16:10,427
(TIRES SCREECHING)
239
00:16:10,511 --> 00:16:12,262
(WYATT AND GARY YELLING)
240
00:16:13,890 --> 00:16:16,308
(UP-TEMPO BLUES MUSIC PLAYING)
241
00:16:16,392 --> 00:16:19,686
(PEOPLE CHATTERING)
242
00:16:28,738 --> 00:16:29,738
(MUSIC STOPS)
243
00:16:33,076 --> 00:16:34,242
(IN A HIGH-PITCHED VOICE)
Lisa?
244
00:16:34,661 --> 00:16:35,827
Yeah?
245
00:16:36,579 --> 00:16:38,747
I don't think
we belong here.
246
00:16:39,082 --> 00:16:41,583
Don't be silly.
It's a public place.
247
00:16:44,921 --> 00:16:47,589
Look, I'm sure we'd
both love to stay,
248
00:16:47,674 --> 00:16:49,007
but we're not 21,
so I think we're gonna...
249
00:16:49,092 --> 00:16:52,469
You're 21.
250
00:16:55,556 --> 00:16:59,142
Well, maybe you'd feel better
if you just got out
there and mingled.
251
00:16:59,227 --> 00:17:01,103
We don't mingle, okay?
252
00:17:02,105 --> 00:17:05,107
Well, maybe you'd
be comfortable if I invited
all these people
253
00:17:05,191 --> 00:17:08,443
back to your house
and we could
all mingle there.
254
00:17:09,654 --> 00:17:11,405
We'll mingle.
We'll mingle.
255
00:17:16,411 --> 00:17:17,744
Hi, dudes.
256
00:17:18,955 --> 00:17:21,164
(ALL GRUMBLING)
257
00:17:29,382 --> 00:17:31,133
Well, goddamn!
258
00:17:33,803 --> 00:17:35,721
You know,
listening to this blues
music reminds me
259
00:17:35,805 --> 00:17:39,182
of my own trials
and tribulations
as a young guy and...
260
00:17:39,267 --> 00:17:41,935
You know, my folks,
they really,
really dump on me.
261
00:17:42,019 --> 00:17:43,562
They really do.
262
00:17:44,689 --> 00:17:47,441
So, you guys get along
with your parents?
263
00:17:50,027 --> 00:17:53,155
I guess you guys moved out
by now, though, huh?
264
00:17:56,826 --> 00:17:58,034
What's this, sir?
265
00:17:58,119 --> 00:17:59,369
Drink it.
266
00:18:01,706 --> 00:18:03,206
(CLEARS THROAT)
267
00:18:03,541 --> 00:18:05,250
Well,
that's a very sweet thought
of both you gentlemen,
268
00:18:05,334 --> 00:18:07,169
but I really don't...
269
00:18:10,214 --> 00:18:11,631
Until now.
270
00:18:16,554 --> 00:18:18,597
See you guys in
the emergency room.
271
00:18:18,681 --> 00:18:20,682
DINO: Hello, pretty lady.
272
00:18:20,850 --> 00:18:22,225
Tell me something.
273
00:18:22,310 --> 00:18:26,146
What's a beautiful broad
like you doing with
a malaka like this?
274
00:18:26,230 --> 00:18:28,190
It's purely sexual.
275
00:18:29,525 --> 00:18:30,817
No shit.
276
00:18:31,402 --> 00:18:33,361
She's into malakas, Dino.
277
00:18:34,447 --> 00:18:37,073
(ALL LAUGHING)
278
00:18:37,158 --> 00:18:39,826
She's into malakes!
Do you believe that?
279
00:18:46,375 --> 00:18:47,876
You can say that again!
280
00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:50,170
(ALL LAUGHING)
281
00:18:55,343 --> 00:18:58,053
(SLOW BLUES MUSIC PLAYING)
282
00:19:05,436 --> 00:19:09,731
Fats, man, let me
tell you my story, man.
283
00:19:10,608 --> 00:19:11,983
Last year,
284
00:19:12,068 --> 00:19:15,654
I was insane for this
crazy little 8th-grade bitch.
285
00:19:15,738 --> 00:19:17,322
Okay?
Crazy insane?
286
00:19:17,406 --> 00:19:18,990
Insane?
Crazy?
287
00:19:19,075 --> 00:19:21,368
I was nuts for
the woman, man.
288
00:19:21,452 --> 00:19:24,579
Now you gotta believe me,
I'm telling the truth here.
289
00:19:24,664 --> 00:19:25,997
I'm speaking to you.
290
00:19:26,082 --> 00:19:29,000
I mean,
I was nuts for the girl.
291
00:19:29,085 --> 00:19:31,670
And what did it to me was
these big titties she had.
292
00:19:31,754 --> 00:19:34,047
For a 13-year-old girl, man.
293
00:19:34,131 --> 00:19:35,340
She wouldn't have
had to worry about
294
00:19:35,424 --> 00:19:37,008
no titties for
the rest of her life, boy.
295
00:19:37,093 --> 00:19:39,845
You know she was set
and she was looking good.
296
00:19:39,929 --> 00:19:41,555
That's the truth, baby.
297
00:19:41,639 --> 00:19:43,682
I called her every
night for, like, a month.
298
00:19:43,766 --> 00:19:45,725
I'm not talking
the bullshit man.
299
00:19:45,810 --> 00:19:47,853
Every damn night?
300
00:19:47,937 --> 00:19:49,688
Every night, Mitch.
I ain't playing with you.
301
00:19:49,772 --> 00:19:51,565
On the telephone?
302
00:19:53,276 --> 00:19:55,777
What's this boy
talking about,
on the telephone, man?
303
00:19:55,862 --> 00:19:57,863
Explain it to him.
304
00:19:57,947 --> 00:19:59,906
Goddamn. We know
there's a telephone, boy.
305
00:19:59,991 --> 00:20:01,616
What the hell
he think I'm doing?
306
00:20:01,701 --> 00:20:03,201
But he hung up on her.
307
00:20:03,286 --> 00:20:04,744
Oh, you didn't
hang up on her!
308
00:20:04,829 --> 00:20:06,288
The chick with
those big, big titties?
309
00:20:06,372 --> 00:20:08,331
I hung up on the bitch.
310
00:20:08,958 --> 00:20:10,166
Now here's the capper.
311
00:20:10,251 --> 00:20:11,710
You know what
the bitch did to me?
312
00:20:11,794 --> 00:20:12,794
Lay it on me.
313
00:20:12,879 --> 00:20:15,213
Check this shit out.
Listen to what she did to me.
314
00:20:15,298 --> 00:20:16,756
She...
She kneed you in the nuts
315
00:20:16,841 --> 00:20:18,884
and called him faggot
in front of everybody.
316
00:20:18,968 --> 00:20:19,968
No.
She did what?
317
00:20:20,052 --> 00:20:21,219
Bitch kneed your nuts?
318
00:20:21,304 --> 00:20:22,679
Bitch kneed my nuts!
319
00:20:22,763 --> 00:20:25,056
Bitch. I'm not playing with
you. I ain't teasing, man.
320
00:20:25,141 --> 00:20:26,433
In the family jewels?
321
00:20:26,517 --> 00:20:28,018
In the family jewels, man.
322
00:20:28,102 --> 00:20:29,269
Worse pain there is.
323
00:20:29,353 --> 00:20:31,021
Broke my heart in two.
324
00:20:31,105 --> 00:20:33,315
She broke more
than your heart.
325
00:20:33,649 --> 00:20:35,066
You're right there, baby.
326
00:20:35,151 --> 00:20:37,068
You can forget
that other one.
327
00:20:37,153 --> 00:20:39,446
You got this fine jewel
sitting right
over here by you.
328
00:20:39,530 --> 00:20:40,530
Yeah.
329
00:20:40,615 --> 00:20:42,574
Ain't that the truth, baby?
330
00:20:42,658 --> 00:20:44,409
That's the plain truth!
331
00:20:44,493 --> 00:20:45,952
There he goes.
332
00:20:46,037 --> 00:20:49,122
(ALL CLAMORING)
333
00:20:49,206 --> 00:20:50,332
Party's over.
334
00:20:50,416 --> 00:20:51,833
Party's over, said the girl.
335
00:20:51,918 --> 00:20:53,209
Okay,
I'm gonna get out of here.
336
00:20:53,294 --> 00:20:56,212
I got money for you
right here. $50 for you.
337
00:21:00,718 --> 00:21:02,010
I got $500 that
boy won't make it...
338
00:21:02,094 --> 00:21:03,970
I bet he's gonna make it.
339
00:21:06,140 --> 00:21:08,850
(SINGING)
Baby, you know I love you
340
00:21:13,689 --> 00:21:16,483
You know, I really
shouldn't be driving.
341
00:21:17,026 --> 00:21:21,613
Hey, listen, I appreciate it.
You know, I really just don't
feel like driving.
342
00:21:21,697 --> 00:21:24,658
Okay, forget it.
I'll drive.
Give me the keys!
343
00:21:24,867 --> 00:21:26,534
Give me the keys!
344
00:21:26,869 --> 00:21:28,995
Is he going to
be all right?
345
00:21:29,455 --> 00:21:32,415
I don't know.
I warned him about
that Blind Dog bourbon.
346
00:21:32,500 --> 00:21:35,502
Hey, he don't even
have his license, Lisa.
347
00:21:35,586 --> 00:21:38,421
He's not lying.
I don't even have
a learner's permit.
348
00:21:38,506 --> 00:21:40,966
Hey, let's scout
another party, man.
349
00:21:41,926 --> 00:21:44,678
What are you gonna
tell Chet about me?
350
00:21:44,762 --> 00:21:46,096
Nothing.
351
00:21:46,180 --> 00:21:47,389
Nothing?
352
00:21:47,890 --> 00:21:50,016
That's not very realistic,
Wyatt.
353
00:21:50,101 --> 00:21:53,937
Look, I don't know.
I'm just trying to
concentrate on the road.
354
00:21:54,021 --> 00:21:56,272
You better concentrate
a little harder.
355
00:21:56,357 --> 00:21:58,525
You're about to
run a red light.
356
00:21:58,609 --> 00:21:59,901
Oh, shit!
357
00:22:08,911 --> 00:22:11,454
GARY: I hate that boy!
I always hated that shit!
358
00:22:11,539 --> 00:22:14,374
I never listen to it!
I hate this car! I hate it!
359
00:22:14,458 --> 00:22:15,917
Are you okay?
360
00:22:18,004 --> 00:22:19,629
Well, my nuts are
halfway up my ass.
361
00:22:19,714 --> 00:22:22,007
But other than that,
I'm perfect.
362
00:22:22,675 --> 00:22:25,260
You better think of
what you're going to
do about Chet.
363
00:22:25,344 --> 00:22:27,512
He's one serious idiot.
364
00:22:28,097 --> 00:22:30,098
You're stewed, butt wad!
365
00:22:31,851 --> 00:22:33,351
Who, me?
366
00:22:33,436 --> 00:22:35,270
Know what time it is?
367
00:22:36,605 --> 00:22:37,647
2:00?
368
00:22:37,732 --> 00:22:39,733
Time to pay the fiddler.
369
00:22:46,282 --> 00:22:50,118
I was kind of counting on you
to be human about this.
370
00:22:56,500 --> 00:22:58,960
Here's the bottom line, Wyatt.
371
00:22:59,670 --> 00:23:02,130
I'm telling Mom
and Dad everything.
372
00:23:03,257 --> 00:23:05,967
I'm even considering
making up some shit.
373
00:23:06,343 --> 00:23:07,635
(SIGHS)
374
00:23:07,970 --> 00:23:10,305
All right, Chet.
Name your price.
375
00:23:11,640 --> 00:23:15,060
$175 and zero cents, cash.
376
00:23:15,144 --> 00:23:19,314
New bills, crisp and clean,
in my wallet by 7:00 a.m.
377
00:23:20,816 --> 00:23:22,150
Thank you.
378
00:23:22,234 --> 00:23:25,320
Hey, what are
big brothers for?
379
00:23:26,906 --> 00:23:28,531
See you upstairs.
380
00:23:29,742 --> 00:23:31,367
I don't need you.
381
00:23:32,995 --> 00:23:35,205
(CLAMORS)
382
00:23:36,332 --> 00:23:37,582
Come on.
383
00:23:38,501 --> 00:23:40,752
The boozehounds return.
384
00:23:41,420 --> 00:23:43,004
What a joke!
385
00:23:43,506 --> 00:23:44,798
Hi, girls.
386
00:23:55,142 --> 00:23:56,142
(BURPS)
387
00:23:56,268 --> 00:23:58,520
CHET: Feeling kind of queasy?
388
00:23:59,021 --> 00:24:04,609
How about a nice
greasy pork sandwich
389
00:24:04,693 --> 00:24:07,195
served in a dirty ashtray?
390
00:24:15,412 --> 00:24:17,205
(LAUGHING)
391
00:24:18,207 --> 00:24:20,375
He pukes, you die.
392
00:24:21,669 --> 00:24:23,795
He's not laughing at you,
Chet. It's just...
393
00:24:23,879 --> 00:24:25,672
GARY: Yes, I am.
394
00:24:26,048 --> 00:24:27,090
Did you tell
Chet about the...
395
00:24:27,174 --> 00:24:28,466
Did he tell you
about the woman
we made tonight?
396
00:24:28,551 --> 00:24:30,468
He's obviously had it.
You know, Chet.
397
00:24:30,553 --> 00:24:31,970
He doesn't know what
he's talking about.
398
00:24:32,054 --> 00:24:33,263
No shit.
399
00:24:33,347 --> 00:24:35,223
No shit, Chet. No shit.
400
00:24:36,016 --> 00:24:39,602
You two donkey dicks
couldn't get laid
in a morgue.
401
00:24:39,687 --> 00:24:41,229
You're right.
You are absolutely right.
402
00:24:41,313 --> 00:24:45,066
You're
absolutely right, Chet,
absolutely right. What?
403
00:24:45,818 --> 00:24:47,068
Come on.
404
00:24:48,112 --> 00:24:50,405
(RETCHING)
405
00:24:58,289 --> 00:25:00,456
Cold-blooded shit he did.
406
00:25:00,541 --> 00:25:02,250
He's an asshole.
Look at his haircut.
407
00:25:02,376 --> 00:25:04,794
Anybody with
a haircut like that
you know is an asshole.
408
00:25:24,607 --> 00:25:25,732
Lisa.
409
00:25:28,402 --> 00:25:29,944
Where are you?
410
00:25:32,239 --> 00:25:34,199
I'm right behind you.
411
00:25:37,870 --> 00:25:39,287
Surprise!
412
00:25:47,463 --> 00:25:49,172
I'm not going to hurt you,
you silly thing.
413
00:25:49,256 --> 00:25:50,256
I mean, your lips.
414
00:25:50,341 --> 00:25:52,091
They feel like
rigor mortis has set in.
415
00:25:52,176 --> 00:25:53,593
Why don't you try
and relax a little bit?
416
00:25:53,677 --> 00:25:55,470
I'm only kissing you.
417
00:25:57,223 --> 00:26:00,391
I wasn't expecting you
to kiss me.
I mean, I was just...
418
00:26:00,476 --> 00:26:01,851
I wasn't...
419
00:26:12,988 --> 00:26:14,656
That was better.
420
00:26:16,909 --> 00:26:18,701
Want to try it again?
421
00:26:18,994 --> 00:26:23,164
If you don't mind.
I mean, yes, please, ma'am.
422
00:26:33,842 --> 00:26:35,218
(WYATT EXCLAIMS)
423
00:26:42,101 --> 00:26:43,810
You sure you're only 15?
424
00:26:43,894 --> 00:26:44,978
(CLEARING THROAT)
425
00:26:45,062 --> 00:26:46,854
I'll be 16 in June.
426
00:26:48,399 --> 00:26:49,816
You made me.
427
00:26:50,484 --> 00:26:52,068
You control me.
428
00:26:57,533 --> 00:27:00,868
What's on your mind?
What are you
thinking about, huh?
429
00:27:03,414 --> 00:27:05,206
Women's gymnastics.
430
00:27:06,709 --> 00:27:09,210
Well, I don't know.
I'll do my best.
431
00:27:10,713 --> 00:27:11,796
Good.
432
00:27:44,705 --> 00:27:47,707
(GROANS)
433
00:27:48,751 --> 00:27:53,713
Wyatt, Wyatt, Wyatt,
where were you?
434
00:27:53,797 --> 00:27:55,465
I'm right here, Gary.
435
00:27:55,549 --> 00:27:57,133
Wyatt, what happened?
436
00:27:57,217 --> 00:27:58,885
I don't know.
437
00:27:58,969 --> 00:28:00,928
I think it was a dream.
438
00:28:03,474 --> 00:28:04,724
What?
439
00:28:04,808 --> 00:28:07,018
Everything. Last night, Lisa.
440
00:28:07,102 --> 00:28:09,187
The whole thing,
it had to be a dream.
441
00:28:09,271 --> 00:28:11,189
It can't be a dream, Wyatt.
442
00:28:11,273 --> 00:28:12,732
We were both in it.
443
00:28:12,816 --> 00:28:15,485
How can two people
have the same dream?
444
00:28:16,403 --> 00:28:18,780
There's no other explanation.
It had to be a dream.
445
00:28:18,864 --> 00:28:22,909
Wait, let's analyze this.
All right, in your dream,
446
00:28:22,993 --> 00:28:26,204
did I get up in
the middle of the night
and yak in your sink?
447
00:28:26,288 --> 00:28:29,707
Didn't throw up. No. Nothing.
You didn't see anything.
448
00:28:29,792 --> 00:28:31,959
Maybe it was a dream,
you know.
449
00:28:33,003 --> 00:28:34,837
A very weird,
450
00:28:34,922 --> 00:28:41,761
bizarre, vivid, erotic,
wet, detailed dream.
451
00:28:43,764 --> 00:28:45,473
Maybe we have malaria.
452
00:28:46,058 --> 00:28:47,350
Shit.
453
00:28:55,067 --> 00:28:58,653
Gary! Wyatt! Breakfast!
454
00:29:02,950 --> 00:29:04,075
Look, I don't have
the kind of bucks
455
00:29:04,159 --> 00:29:06,202
it would take to pay
Chet off about this.
456
00:29:06,286 --> 00:29:07,995
CHET: Yo, Wyatt! Coffee!
457
00:29:08,080 --> 00:29:11,499
You can't live
in fear of Chet
for the rest of your life.
458
00:29:11,583 --> 00:29:13,709
Why not? Just please...
459
00:29:16,130 --> 00:29:17,463
I don't know, Wyatt.
460
00:29:17,548 --> 00:29:20,633
I mean, it's seriously
affecting your sex life.
461
00:29:20,926 --> 00:29:24,679
Ten seconds into my
gymnastics routine,
you passed out.
462
00:29:24,763 --> 00:29:26,180
You slept.
463
00:29:27,182 --> 00:29:28,766
I did my toes.
464
00:29:28,851 --> 00:29:31,602
By the way,
you're very cute.
465
00:29:31,687 --> 00:29:34,355
We'll try it again
some other time, okay?
466
00:29:38,110 --> 00:29:39,902
Good morning, turd brain.
467
00:29:39,987 --> 00:29:41,279
Hi, Chet.
468
00:29:46,410 --> 00:29:48,035
You spit in this?
469
00:29:48,412 --> 00:29:50,455
Not that I'm aware of, no.
470
00:29:51,540 --> 00:29:53,666
Hey, that looks pretty good.
471
00:29:59,423 --> 00:30:02,049
Now make yourself one,
dick weed.
472
00:30:08,849 --> 00:30:10,600
I like your panties.
473
00:30:11,560 --> 00:30:12,560
(BURPS)
474
00:30:13,228 --> 00:30:14,687
It's a joke, Chet.
You know, it's all...
475
00:30:14,771 --> 00:30:16,397
That's not a joke!
476
00:30:16,482 --> 00:30:18,858
That is a severe
behavioral disorder.
477
00:30:18,942 --> 00:30:21,194
Those are
women's underpants!
478
00:30:21,570 --> 00:30:25,531
I mean, the next thing
you know, you'll be wearing
a bra on your head.
479
00:30:25,616 --> 00:30:29,202
The old man's
going to have a stroke
on this one for sure.
480
00:30:30,412 --> 00:30:32,330
All right, Chet.
How much?
481
00:30:32,414 --> 00:30:33,664
How much?
482
00:30:34,333 --> 00:30:36,876
CHET: This goes way
beyond payment, pal.
483
00:30:36,960 --> 00:30:38,920
Come on, Chet. Please?
484
00:30:40,923 --> 00:30:42,173
Well...
485
00:30:45,093 --> 00:30:47,261
Your VCR should cover it.
486
00:30:47,387 --> 00:30:48,804
For openers.
487
00:30:49,848 --> 00:30:51,224
Thank you.
488
00:30:51,725 --> 00:30:54,644
For Christ's sakes,
will you cover yourself?
489
00:31:14,790 --> 00:31:18,209
You guys looking
for something for your mom?
490
00:31:20,587 --> 00:31:22,964
I really don't
think so, Sue.
491
00:31:25,092 --> 00:31:28,010
You guys have girlfriends?
492
00:31:28,512 --> 00:31:31,222
You know, Sue,
one does really not refer
493
00:31:31,306 --> 00:31:33,891
to a 23-year-old
woman as a girlfriend.
494
00:31:35,185 --> 00:31:36,894
WYATT: Mistress, Gar.
GARY: Mistress.
495
00:31:36,979 --> 00:31:37,979
Lover.
Lover.
496
00:31:38,063 --> 00:31:39,272
Sex.
Sexpot.
497
00:31:39,356 --> 00:31:41,440
She's a sexpot
is what she is.
498
00:31:41,525 --> 00:31:44,318
You guys are
the ones that got beat up
499
00:31:44,403 --> 00:31:46,654
at the homecoming game,
right?
500
00:31:51,785 --> 00:31:55,288
Susan, do you think you
could wrap up a bottle
of this scent for me?
501
00:31:55,372 --> 00:31:57,164
Cause it's... I like this.
502
00:31:57,249 --> 00:31:58,749
Two.
503
00:31:58,834 --> 00:32:00,960
And why don't
you set yourself up
with one of them, too.
504
00:32:01,044 --> 00:32:03,921
Set yourself up.
That's three scents, please.
505
00:32:04,840 --> 00:32:07,008
If you were
a 15-year-old boy,
506
00:32:08,343 --> 00:32:10,344
would these turn you on?
507
00:32:12,180 --> 00:32:14,473
I think so, too.
I'll take them.
508
00:32:22,316 --> 00:32:24,650
Do you have
a bra to match that?
509
00:32:24,735 --> 00:32:27,945
Something in
leather or rubber,
or barb wire?
510
00:32:28,030 --> 00:32:29,739
Give me a break.
511
00:32:32,868 --> 00:32:34,493
Check it out.
Check it out.
512
00:32:34,578 --> 00:32:35,703
What?
513
00:32:40,626 --> 00:32:41,959
Five bucks?
514
00:32:42,044 --> 00:32:43,294
Finsky.
515
00:32:46,381 --> 00:32:48,591
Max, what are you
going to do?
516
00:32:52,304 --> 00:32:54,055
You know what, Gar,
517
00:32:54,890 --> 00:32:56,807
for the first time
in my life,
518
00:32:56,892 --> 00:32:58,976
I don't feel
like a total dick.
519
00:32:59,061 --> 00:33:00,645
Yeah, me either.
520
00:33:02,898 --> 00:33:06,984
(ALL LAUGHING)
521
00:33:12,115 --> 00:33:13,324
Sorry, boys.
522
00:33:13,408 --> 00:33:14,950
Momentary loss
of motor, nerds.
523
00:33:15,077 --> 00:33:16,285
You guys
getting tired of this?
We're not.
524
00:33:16,370 --> 00:33:18,412
But I'll tell you one thing,
there is a cure.
525
00:33:18,497 --> 00:33:21,165
Rumor has it there's a big
white sale going on.
526
00:33:21,249 --> 00:33:23,334
At Towel World!
Towel World!
527
00:33:24,795 --> 00:33:26,671
We're not impressed.
No.
528
00:33:33,220 --> 00:33:35,513
Can I have some
of that, please?
529
00:33:38,016 --> 00:33:39,934
You know I'm getting
really bored of their shit.
530
00:33:40,018 --> 00:33:41,227
Well, do you want
to dump them?
531
00:33:41,311 --> 00:33:42,812
I don't know.
532
00:33:43,271 --> 00:33:44,772
Well, we have been
with them three months.
533
00:33:44,856 --> 00:33:46,524
We've been to
all the parties.
We've met all the people.
534
00:33:46,608 --> 00:33:47,858
We won't go to
any more parties
535
00:33:47,943 --> 00:33:49,193
and we won't meet
any more people.
536
00:33:49,277 --> 00:33:51,445
We'll go into
a social coma.
537
00:33:52,489 --> 00:33:53,864
Sorry.
Sorry.
538
00:33:53,949 --> 00:33:55,366
We're sorry.
539
00:33:55,450 --> 00:33:57,368
Want to give them
another chance?
540
00:33:57,452 --> 00:33:58,536
Okay.
541
00:33:59,996 --> 00:34:01,539
Will you forgive us?
Please.
542
00:34:01,623 --> 00:34:03,499
Oh, you guys.
543
00:34:04,209 --> 00:34:06,627
What are we
gonna do with you?
544
00:34:35,657 --> 00:34:36,866
(CHATTERING)
545
00:34:40,328 --> 00:34:42,496
Excuse me.
Get out of my way.
546
00:34:43,165 --> 00:34:45,082
We got her,
we got her, we got her.
547
00:34:55,343 --> 00:34:56,343
Hey!
548
00:35:02,809 --> 00:35:03,851
Hey.
549
00:35:04,770 --> 00:35:05,895
Hi.
550
00:35:08,356 --> 00:35:09,607
That's lan.
551
00:35:09,691 --> 00:35:11,150
This is Max.
552
00:35:11,610 --> 00:35:13,360
We call him Mad Max.
553
00:35:15,197 --> 00:35:16,739
We saw you on the escalator.
554
00:35:16,823 --> 00:35:17,948
Yeah.
555
00:35:18,700 --> 00:35:21,452
Yeah, you were
looking at us, right?
556
00:35:21,536 --> 00:35:22,703
Yeah.
557
00:35:29,002 --> 00:35:30,377
So what are you doing?
558
00:35:30,462 --> 00:35:32,797
Nothing.
I'm waiting for my ride.
559
00:35:32,881 --> 00:35:35,049
(HORN BLARING)
560
00:35:35,133 --> 00:35:36,926
(PEOPLE SCREAMING)
561
00:35:47,270 --> 00:35:50,648
Lis, come on, hon.
We're running late.
562
00:35:50,732 --> 00:35:52,983
Honey, move.
563
00:35:53,068 --> 00:35:54,819
Speak to you later.
564
00:36:05,705 --> 00:36:07,665
She likes the rough stuff.
565
00:36:07,749 --> 00:36:09,750
What can I do, you know?
566
00:36:14,631 --> 00:36:18,133
By the way,
there's a party tonight
at Wyatt's house.
567
00:36:18,218 --> 00:36:22,054
You can find his name
in the students'
directory under Donnelly.
568
00:36:22,472 --> 00:36:24,265
Pass the word around.
569
00:36:28,645 --> 00:36:29,770
Party?
570
00:36:29,855 --> 00:36:33,065
(TIRES SCREECHING)
571
00:36:37,946 --> 00:36:39,280
Don't ask.
572
00:36:41,408 --> 00:36:43,617
Wyatt, you're going
to have a heart attack
by the time you're 40
573
00:36:43,702 --> 00:36:45,786
if you don't learn
to relax.
574
00:36:46,162 --> 00:36:48,414
Have you tried
inversion boots?
575
00:36:49,291 --> 00:36:52,251
Lisa, you don't
understand my parents.
576
00:36:53,587 --> 00:36:55,337
LISA:
What's there to understand?
577
00:36:55,422 --> 00:36:57,047
They're oppressive,
meddlesome,
578
00:36:57,132 --> 00:36:58,883
difficult, demanding
and totally bizarre.
579
00:36:58,967 --> 00:37:00,801
I mean,
they're normal parents.
580
00:37:00,886 --> 00:37:03,637
Now stop worrying
and go and get dressed.
581
00:37:04,848 --> 00:37:07,099
WYATT: Lisa, I created you.
582
00:37:07,183 --> 00:37:09,935
Why do you do
insist on doing things
I don't want?
583
00:37:10,020 --> 00:37:12,605
Honey buns,
you want to party so badly,
you could bottle it.
584
00:37:12,689 --> 00:37:15,024
I mean, you and Gary,
you want friends,
you want popularity,
585
00:37:15,108 --> 00:37:16,901
you want all
that stuff, right?
586
00:37:16,985 --> 00:37:19,737
Well, I thought
about it, sure, but...
587
00:37:21,448 --> 00:37:23,365
So I'm giving it to you.
588
00:37:25,327 --> 00:37:26,952
Thank you, really, thank you.
589
00:37:27,037 --> 00:37:29,914
But I don't want it
in my house.
590
00:37:29,998 --> 00:37:31,790
If you want to be
a party animal,
591
00:37:31,875 --> 00:37:33,417
you have to learn to
live in the jungle.
592
00:37:33,501 --> 00:37:36,045
Now stop worrying
and go and get dressed.
593
00:37:36,129 --> 00:37:38,422
I'm going to go
and pick up Gary.
594
00:37:38,715 --> 00:37:41,050
I can't wait to
meet his parents.
595
00:37:49,351 --> 00:37:51,644
Do you go to Gary's school?
596
00:37:53,730 --> 00:37:56,857
Do I look like
I'm in high school?
597
00:37:56,942 --> 00:37:57,942
No.
598
00:37:58,026 --> 00:38:02,112
Well, what it is, Dad,
she's a foreign
exchange student, you know.
599
00:38:02,197 --> 00:38:04,239
And they have,
like, a different
educational system
600
00:38:04,324 --> 00:38:05,616
happening around the world.
601
00:38:05,700 --> 00:38:07,242
You look very
602
00:38:08,870 --> 00:38:10,162
mature.
603
00:38:10,246 --> 00:38:12,957
Doesn't she?
That's funny you
say that 'cause
604
00:38:13,041 --> 00:38:14,291
I was thinking
the same thing.
605
00:38:14,376 --> 00:38:16,210
And what happened
was that...
606
00:38:16,294 --> 00:38:18,837
So what do you do
for a living, Al?
607
00:38:18,922 --> 00:38:21,256
I'm an independent
businessman.
608
00:38:21,341 --> 00:38:25,386
Al... Dad. My dad's a plumber.
And he's into plumbing.
609
00:38:25,470 --> 00:38:28,222
And, well, I guess
you plumb, right, Dad?
610
00:38:29,474 --> 00:38:30,808
Yeah.
611
00:38:30,892 --> 00:38:34,186
Yeah, well,
I think it's time to go.
612
00:38:34,270 --> 00:38:35,312
You ready?
613
00:38:35,397 --> 00:38:37,064
Where do you think
you're going?
614
00:38:37,148 --> 00:38:39,066
To a party.
To a movie.
615
00:38:39,818 --> 00:38:42,069
Movie party is
what it is, folks.
616
00:38:42,153 --> 00:38:43,404
We're going to
a movie party.
617
00:38:43,488 --> 00:38:44,571
Such a little liar.
618
00:38:44,656 --> 00:38:46,657
No. I've whipped up
this nasty little soiree
619
00:38:46,741 --> 00:38:48,492
over at his friend
Wyatt's house.
620
00:38:48,576 --> 00:38:49,576
Soir what?
621
00:38:49,661 --> 00:38:52,538
Soiree, honey.
I think that means party.
622
00:38:53,748 --> 00:38:54,707
Party.
623
00:38:54,791 --> 00:38:57,251
You know, there's going to be
sex, drugs, rock and roll,
624
00:38:57,335 --> 00:38:59,503
chips, dips, chains, whips...
625
00:38:59,587 --> 00:39:01,839
You know, your basic
high school orgy
type of thing.
626
00:39:01,923 --> 00:39:05,676
I mean, I'm not
talking candle wax
on the nipples
627
00:39:05,760 --> 00:39:07,511
or witchcraft
or anything like that.
628
00:39:07,595 --> 00:39:10,597
No, no, no. No,
just a couple of hundred kids
629
00:39:10,682 --> 00:39:14,309
running around
in their underwear
acting like complete animals.
630
00:39:14,394 --> 00:39:16,854
All right, God damn it!
I've heard enough!
631
00:39:16,938 --> 00:39:19,398
Gary, you get to your room!
Yes, sir!
632
00:39:19,482 --> 00:39:22,484
No, it's okay. Just sit here.
I'll take care of this.
633
00:39:22,569 --> 00:39:26,864
Girlie,
you get the hell out of here
before I throw you out.
634
00:39:26,948 --> 00:39:28,824
Don't threaten me, Al!
635
00:39:29,367 --> 00:39:32,036
You're out of shape.
I'll kick your ass.
636
00:39:32,495 --> 00:39:35,289
I'm going to make
this real easy for you.
637
00:39:36,458 --> 00:39:39,710
I'm taking Gary to a party.
638
00:39:39,961 --> 00:39:41,795
Over my dead body.
639
00:39:42,130 --> 00:39:45,674
He's a good kid.
He studies hard.
640
00:39:46,342 --> 00:39:47,509
You've got no complaints.
641
00:39:47,594 --> 00:39:50,763
If anybody
should be bitching,
it should be Gary.
642
00:39:50,847 --> 00:39:53,390
You ever compliment him
on his grades?
643
00:39:53,475 --> 00:39:55,476
You ever compliment him
on anything?
644
00:39:55,560 --> 00:39:58,270
Hey! Hey! Look, Ma,
compliments embarrass me.
645
00:39:58,354 --> 00:39:59,563
You know. Dad, you know.
646
00:39:59,647 --> 00:40:01,273
Shut up!
Shut up!
647
00:40:02,734 --> 00:40:05,360
Have you ever
wondered how sad it is
648
00:40:05,445 --> 00:40:08,322
that your son's
only sexual outlet
649
00:40:08,406 --> 00:40:11,533
is tossing off to magazines
in the bathroom?
650
00:40:11,618 --> 00:40:13,827
Oh, Gary!
651
00:40:13,912 --> 00:40:16,538
Ma, I never tossed off
to anything!
652
00:40:16,623 --> 00:40:19,041
You told me you
were combing your hair!
653
00:40:19,125 --> 00:40:20,751
But I was! I was! Mom!
654
00:40:20,835 --> 00:40:22,419
Mom! I've never...
Gary, shut up!
655
00:40:22,504 --> 00:40:24,254
Water's running all day.
656
00:40:24,339 --> 00:40:25,547
Shut up!
657
00:40:25,632 --> 00:40:28,258
I've never tossed off!
I've never tossed off!
658
00:40:28,343 --> 00:40:30,094
And you wouldn't
tell your own mother!
659
00:40:30,178 --> 00:40:31,595
Shut up!
660
00:40:31,679 --> 00:40:33,806
Shut up! Shut up!
661
00:40:36,392 --> 00:40:39,228
This guy deserves a party.
662
00:40:40,021 --> 00:40:42,439
Look, I don't know
who you are,
663
00:40:43,024 --> 00:40:45,984
what you are,
or where you came from,
664
00:40:46,861 --> 00:40:49,363
but I'm not taking
any more of this.
665
00:40:50,198 --> 00:40:53,867
Dial the police, Lucy.
Dial the damn police
and give me the phone.
666
00:40:53,952 --> 00:40:56,954
(STUTTERING)
The phone.
I'm going to get the...
667
00:40:58,039 --> 00:41:01,375
Give me the phone.
I'm trying to...
Well, here it is.
668
00:41:01,459 --> 00:41:03,794
(LUCY PANTING)
669
00:41:08,925 --> 00:41:11,093
God. Oh, Christ.
670
00:41:12,387 --> 00:41:14,012
AL: Oh, Lord God.
671
00:41:17,517 --> 00:41:20,185
(STUTTERS)
672
00:41:21,020 --> 00:41:22,396
Go ahead...
673
00:41:23,439 --> 00:41:24,898
Make your day?
674
00:41:30,989 --> 00:41:33,657
I'm really sorry
it has to come to this.
675
00:41:33,741 --> 00:41:35,200
Come to what?
676
00:41:36,369 --> 00:41:39,413
If you don't cheer up,
I'll blow your face off.
677
00:41:51,926 --> 00:41:54,803
Oh, come on,
don't be such an old lady.
Everything's cool.
678
00:41:54,888 --> 00:41:56,763
Everything's cool!
Everything's cool.
679
00:41:56,848 --> 00:41:58,849
Yeah, yeah. My dad's
going to castrate me.
680
00:41:58,933 --> 00:42:01,018
And my mother almost had,
like, a cardiac arrest.
681
00:42:01,102 --> 00:42:02,352
My parents are
never going to let me
in the house,
682
00:42:02,437 --> 00:42:03,896
and if they do,
I'll be grounded
till I'm 45.
683
00:42:03,980 --> 00:42:05,063
But other than that,
everything's great.
684
00:42:05,148 --> 00:42:06,231
Everything's
just really cool.
685
00:42:06,316 --> 00:42:09,276
I mean, you know, I mean,
couldn't be better.
686
00:42:09,944 --> 00:42:12,446
Listen, trust me
for once, will you?
687
00:42:14,407 --> 00:42:16,617
They don't know
what happened.
688
00:42:20,038 --> 00:42:23,874
Did you think Gary was
acting a little strangely
this evening?
689
00:42:26,002 --> 00:42:27,127
Gary?
690
00:42:28,755 --> 00:42:30,130
Who's Gary?
691
00:42:35,011 --> 00:42:37,596
Lisa, you have to
promise me
692
00:42:38,223 --> 00:42:40,307
that things aren't going
to get out of control.
693
00:42:40,391 --> 00:42:43,936
Wyatt, don't worry.
You're just having
a few friends over.
694
00:42:44,270 --> 00:42:46,480
I don't have
any friends, Lisa.
695
00:42:46,773 --> 00:42:48,148
He doesn't.
696
00:42:49,817 --> 00:42:51,401
Boy ain't lying.
697
00:42:51,486 --> 00:42:52,653
(DOORBELL RINGS)
698
00:42:53,488 --> 00:42:54,947
You do now.
699
00:43:03,665 --> 00:43:04,998
Hi.
700
00:43:05,083 --> 00:43:07,042
ALL: Hi!
701
00:43:07,126 --> 00:43:08,252
MAN: Party!
702
00:43:08,336 --> 00:43:10,087
ALL: Party! Party!
Party! Party!
703
00:43:10,171 --> 00:43:11,755
Party! Party! Party! Party!
704
00:43:11,839 --> 00:43:14,424
Party! Party! Party!
705
00:43:14,509 --> 00:43:15,717
Party! Party! Party!
Party! Party! Party!
706
00:43:16,177 --> 00:43:17,761
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)
707
00:43:39,367 --> 00:43:40,617
(SHOUTS)
708
00:43:41,577 --> 00:43:44,204
How you doing?
709
00:43:44,747 --> 00:43:46,540
Where's the bar?
Bar!
710
00:43:49,877 --> 00:43:52,713
Do you think they'll
embarrass us tonight?
711
00:43:52,797 --> 00:43:55,799
Yeah.
712
00:44:01,389 --> 00:44:02,681
Caviar?
713
00:44:03,349 --> 00:44:06,351
If Max and lan see her,
it is all over for us.
714
00:44:08,313 --> 00:44:09,688
How's your stomach?
715
00:44:09,772 --> 00:44:11,606
It's a little better.
716
00:44:11,816 --> 00:44:15,068
If you're going to
float an air biscuit,
let me know, okay?
717
00:44:15,153 --> 00:44:16,695
Float a what?
718
00:44:16,779 --> 00:44:18,405
If you're going to fart,
if you're going
to squeeze cheese,
719
00:44:18,489 --> 00:44:20,490
let me know, okay?
I'll hit the fan.
720
00:44:20,575 --> 00:44:23,410
I'm sorry, Gary.
It's just I suffer
pain and discomfort
721
00:44:23,494 --> 00:44:26,079
due to occasional
stomach upset.
722
00:44:26,914 --> 00:44:29,374
You know,
I can't believe this, Wyatt.
I'm so disappointed in us.
723
00:44:29,459 --> 00:44:30,459
I mean, all we ever do
is sit around
724
00:44:30,543 --> 00:44:31,585
and talk about
how great it would be
725
00:44:31,669 --> 00:44:33,003
if we went to parties, right?
And...
726
00:44:33,087 --> 00:44:34,046
And now it's our party,
727
00:44:34,130 --> 00:44:35,797
and there are
hundreds of people
here having a great time,
728
00:44:35,882 --> 00:44:37,674
and we're in the john.
We're in the john.
729
00:44:37,759 --> 00:44:39,551
I can't believe it.
730
00:44:39,635 --> 00:44:41,345
Gary, you're just
as uptight as I am,
all right?
731
00:44:41,429 --> 00:44:44,222
Let me tell you something.
Nobody can be as
uptight as you, okay?
732
00:44:44,307 --> 00:44:46,308
Nobody. Your middle
name is tense, okay?
733
00:44:46,392 --> 00:44:48,018
Wyatt "Tense Up" Donnelly.
734
00:44:48,102 --> 00:44:49,686
All right, this is true.
This is true.
735
00:44:49,771 --> 00:44:50,854
It's true.
736
00:44:50,938 --> 00:44:52,105
But...
737
00:44:52,774 --> 00:44:55,942
It's not that bad.
I mean, we can
hear the music.
738
00:44:56,736 --> 00:44:58,111
This is great.
We can dance.
So that's great.
739
00:44:58,196 --> 00:45:00,739
If we put our
noses to the door,
maybe we can smell the food.
740
00:45:00,823 --> 00:45:02,074
Hey, brother!
741
00:45:02,158 --> 00:45:04,326
What's happening,
my main man?
742
00:45:04,660 --> 00:45:05,952
Right on!
743
00:45:06,621 --> 00:45:07,579
Scotch.
744
00:45:07,663 --> 00:45:09,164
Straight up?
745
00:45:09,248 --> 00:45:10,832
Give me the whole bottle.
746
00:45:10,917 --> 00:45:15,587
Tell you what. You bend over
and I'll shove it
straight up your ass.
747
00:45:16,798 --> 00:45:18,632
On the rocks is fine.
748
00:45:21,052 --> 00:45:24,012
Yeah, that's what I thought
you were gonna say.
749
00:45:37,610 --> 00:45:38,610
There she is.
750
00:45:38,694 --> 00:45:40,570
You deal with the drinks.
I'll kill the girls.
751
00:45:54,794 --> 00:45:56,920
I wonder if Lisa's
having a good time.
752
00:45:57,004 --> 00:46:00,590
Lisa could have a good time
at an insurance seminar,
Wyatt.
753
00:46:00,675 --> 00:46:03,677
You know, the thing that
really galls me
754
00:46:04,887 --> 00:46:08,140
is that she's ours
and we can't
get close to her.
755
00:46:10,852 --> 00:46:12,310
Hit the fan.
756
00:46:15,940 --> 00:46:17,941
This is, like, the best
party I've ever been to.
757
00:46:18,025 --> 00:46:19,734
I know. It's great!
758
00:46:20,403 --> 00:46:22,779
Do you know
whose house this is?
759
00:46:23,239 --> 00:46:24,656
I don't know.
I think it might be
760
00:46:24,740 --> 00:46:27,159
that girl with
the English accent.
761
00:46:27,535 --> 00:46:29,244
Did you notice that girl
doesn't have a zit
762
00:46:29,328 --> 00:46:31,079
on her whole body?
Did you notice that?
763
00:46:31,164 --> 00:46:33,039
I know.
She has, like, zero fat.
764
00:46:33,124 --> 00:46:34,583
And she's so relaxed.
765
00:46:34,709 --> 00:46:36,877
She burped and it was,
like, charming.
Charming.
766
00:46:36,961 --> 00:46:38,003
Yeah.
767
00:46:39,547 --> 00:46:40,714
Shit.
768
00:46:42,383 --> 00:46:44,217
Yeah.
The bathroom.
769
00:46:52,435 --> 00:46:53,477
Ladies.
Hi.
770
00:46:53,561 --> 00:46:54,728
Hi.
Hi.
771
00:46:56,481 --> 00:46:58,398
GARY: I can't believe you!
I cannot...
772
00:46:58,483 --> 00:47:01,109
You're dropping wolf bait
and there are chicks outside!
773
00:47:01,194 --> 00:47:04,654
Light a match or something.
Light a fire, I don't know.
774
00:47:07,366 --> 00:47:08,658
Hi.
Hi.
775
00:47:08,743 --> 00:47:10,118
Hi.
776
00:47:10,203 --> 00:47:12,370
We're sorry.
We thought there were
just girls in there.
777
00:47:12,455 --> 00:47:13,497
I'm sorry.
778
00:47:13,581 --> 00:47:15,790
It's just us dudes.
You know.
779
00:47:16,209 --> 00:47:18,210
What are you doing here?
780
00:47:18,294 --> 00:47:20,712
WYATT: Gary was
just taking a shit.
781
00:47:21,214 --> 00:47:22,923
No, what I meant was...
782
00:47:24,800 --> 00:47:27,886
No, no, what I meant was,
what are you
doing at the party?
783
00:47:27,970 --> 00:47:29,679
Oh, it's my house.
784
00:47:29,764 --> 00:47:31,515
This is your party?
785
00:47:31,599 --> 00:47:34,267
Yeah, well, you know,
we like to do this
about once a week.
786
00:47:34,393 --> 00:47:35,560
You know,
throw little gatherings here.
Really?
787
00:47:35,645 --> 00:47:36,770
Yeah, little get-togethers.
That kind of thing.
788
00:47:36,854 --> 00:47:38,688
Haven't you guys been by?
Or...
789
00:47:38,773 --> 00:47:39,773
No.
790
00:47:39,857 --> 00:47:41,358
How the heck did we
miss these two, Wyatt?
791
00:47:41,442 --> 00:47:43,860
I don't know.
So many people,
so many parties.
792
00:47:43,945 --> 00:47:45,946
So many people, you know,
and so many parties.
793
00:47:46,030 --> 00:47:48,240
You know,
you lose track and...
794
00:47:48,824 --> 00:47:51,952
Would you mind if I came in
and checked my face?
795
00:47:52,036 --> 00:47:54,120
What's wrong
with your face?
796
00:47:55,706 --> 00:47:57,290
Can we come in?
797
00:47:57,333 --> 00:47:59,834
Come on in.
WYATT: Sure, yeah.
Okay. Be our guests.
798
00:47:59,919 --> 00:48:01,294
Thanks, guys.
799
00:48:01,379 --> 00:48:02,712
Come on in.
800
00:48:05,091 --> 00:48:06,258
Well...
801
00:48:07,093 --> 00:48:09,135
We've seen you
guys at school,
but we've never met.
802
00:48:09,220 --> 00:48:10,387
You're Hilly.
You're Deb.
803
00:48:10,471 --> 00:48:11,596
How you doing?
Deb.
804
00:48:11,681 --> 00:48:13,473
You're Deb. Hi. I'm Gary.
I'm Wyatt.
805
00:48:13,558 --> 00:48:14,641
Hi, Gary.
806
00:48:14,725 --> 00:48:17,143
Well, what have
you guys been doing?
807
00:48:18,145 --> 00:48:21,856
This is a wild crowd.
I didn't know you guys
had so many friends.
808
00:48:21,941 --> 00:48:24,442
Yeah, neither did we.
Neither did we.
809
00:48:26,112 --> 00:48:27,571
Who's the girl
with the accent?
810
00:48:27,655 --> 00:48:29,322
I thought that this
was her party, but I...
811
00:48:29,407 --> 00:48:33,493
You mean the real sensuous,
exotic, sexy, mature,
sex symbol type?
812
00:48:33,578 --> 00:48:34,995
Yeah.
Yeah.
813
00:48:35,413 --> 00:48:37,163
GARY: She's with us.
814
00:48:37,707 --> 00:48:39,457
She's with you guys?
815
00:48:40,543 --> 00:48:42,460
Come on, Lisa. Why not?
816
00:48:44,505 --> 00:48:46,965
Because I belong
to Gary and Wyatt.
817
00:48:47,883 --> 00:48:51,636
Belong? What?
They make you in the garage
with power tools?
818
00:48:52,013 --> 00:48:55,223
They own you? Control you?
Seriously.
819
00:48:56,017 --> 00:48:57,267
Seriously.
820
00:48:57,351 --> 00:48:58,852
They're toads.
821
00:48:58,978 --> 00:49:01,730
Do I look like I'd
go out with two toads?
822
00:49:02,440 --> 00:49:04,941
You do. It's true.
823
00:49:05,776 --> 00:49:07,569
I think Gary and
Wyatt are gonna force
824
00:49:07,653 --> 00:49:09,988
everyone to
redefine their terms.
825
00:49:11,741 --> 00:49:14,242
And you're completely
loyal to them?
826
00:49:14,869 --> 00:49:17,746
I do whatever they say.
827
00:49:29,383 --> 00:49:30,425
Hi.
828
00:49:33,220 --> 00:49:36,556
Could you excuse us
for a minute, please?
829
00:49:37,141 --> 00:49:38,975
That's no problem.
Yeah, we'll be in here.
830
00:49:39,060 --> 00:49:41,394
Yeah, that's where we'll...
Yeah.
831
00:49:49,195 --> 00:49:50,570
Okay, fine.
832
00:49:54,450 --> 00:49:56,701
I could be wrong, but I think
these ladies are
stoked for us, Wyatt.
833
00:49:56,786 --> 00:49:58,119
I got that feeling myself.
834
00:49:58,204 --> 00:49:59,371
What do we do?
I don't know.
835
00:49:59,455 --> 00:50:00,955
Should we go for it?
What about Lisa?
836
00:50:01,040 --> 00:50:02,165
She did say we should party.
837
00:50:02,249 --> 00:50:03,792
Look, let's get it on
with these two,
score points
838
00:50:03,876 --> 00:50:05,418
and go back to Lisa.
This is like
a dream come true.
839
00:50:05,503 --> 00:50:07,337
How about if we see
if we can score
the points with these two
840
00:50:07,421 --> 00:50:08,505
and deal with them in
case we can't later.
841
00:50:08,589 --> 00:50:09,589
Sounds good.
842
00:50:09,674 --> 00:50:10,882
But whatever happens,
gotta give Lisa a shot.
843
00:50:10,966 --> 00:50:12,050
I don't want to
hurt her feelings.
844
00:50:12,134 --> 00:50:14,594
I think the girls are
looking for a long,
lean bone job from me.
845
00:50:14,679 --> 00:50:15,845
Ready to party down?
10-4.
846
00:50:15,930 --> 00:50:17,722
Let's break.
Break.
847
00:50:29,151 --> 00:50:31,361
Those guys are weird,
but they're kind of cute.
848
00:50:31,445 --> 00:50:33,196
Hi.
Hi.
849
00:50:33,280 --> 00:50:35,824
And where did you
two disappear to?
850
00:50:36,951 --> 00:50:40,120
Nowhere.
We were in the kitchen.
We were in the bathroom.
851
00:50:41,122 --> 00:50:42,789
Eating.
Doing our hair.
852
00:50:43,457 --> 00:50:45,500
Have you met Gary and Wyatt?
853
00:50:45,584 --> 00:50:47,001
Yeah.
No.
854
00:50:47,962 --> 00:50:49,212
Sort of.
855
00:50:51,173 --> 00:50:53,049
If you get the chance,
856
00:50:53,634 --> 00:50:54,718
shower with them.
857
00:50:54,802 --> 00:50:55,969
I did.
858
00:50:56,178 --> 00:50:58,054
It's a mind scrambler!
859
00:50:59,223 --> 00:51:00,890
Hurts so good.
860
00:51:06,439 --> 00:51:08,314
She took a shower
with them.
861
00:51:08,983 --> 00:51:11,276
I have
a wonderful idea, Henry.
862
00:51:11,736 --> 00:51:15,572
After dinner,
why don't we stop by
and visit with Wyatt.
863
00:51:15,990 --> 00:51:19,284
I hate to think
of his being alone
at home tonight.
864
00:51:19,952 --> 00:51:21,828
Doesn't he have
anything to read?
865
00:51:21,912 --> 00:51:23,747
Well, I don't know, dear,
866
00:51:23,831 --> 00:51:27,250
but you know nothing's
more important
to a teenage boy
867
00:51:27,334 --> 00:51:29,210
than his grandparents.
868
00:51:29,670 --> 00:51:31,588
We'll drop by.
Oh, good.
869
00:51:32,840 --> 00:51:34,174
(LOUD ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)
870
00:51:45,561 --> 00:51:50,523
I'd like to open up
by apologizing for the
ICEE today at the mall.
871
00:51:50,608 --> 00:51:52,776
It was very immature.
And I'm sorry.
872
00:51:52,860 --> 00:51:56,446
And... It was just,
like, tomfoolery.
873
00:51:57,114 --> 00:51:58,698
But we are sorry.
874
00:51:58,783 --> 00:52:00,325
It happened.
875
00:52:00,409 --> 00:52:01,534
Yeah.
876
00:52:01,869 --> 00:52:03,870
So what's the deal
with Lisa?
877
00:52:03,954 --> 00:52:06,080
You know,
can we borrow her?
878
00:52:07,041 --> 00:52:08,166
We can't do that, guys.
879
00:52:08,250 --> 00:52:10,668
You know, because
common decency prohibits us.
We can't.
880
00:52:10,753 --> 00:52:12,170
It's not that cool.
881
00:52:12,254 --> 00:52:14,714
Well, she said it was cool.
Yeah.
882
00:52:14,799 --> 00:52:18,551
We can't take advantage
of her loyalties.
Sorry, guys.
883
00:52:18,636 --> 00:52:21,554
Man, but that's
really selfish.
That hurts, you know.
884
00:52:21,639 --> 00:52:22,889
Lan...
885
00:52:23,516 --> 00:52:25,767
Just forget it, guys,
'cause we can't
do it, you know?
886
00:52:25,851 --> 00:52:28,603
Come on.
Quit being such pricks.
887
00:52:28,687 --> 00:52:29,813
Hey, come on.
888
00:52:29,897 --> 00:52:32,148
Regardless of what
she may have told you,
889
00:52:32,233 --> 00:52:34,317
our feelings for
Lisa run very deep.
890
00:52:34,401 --> 00:52:36,903
It's, like, emotions.
Heavy, heavy emotions.
891
00:52:36,987 --> 00:52:39,906
Our feelings for Deb
and Hilly run as deep
as yours do for Lisa.
892
00:52:39,990 --> 00:52:41,407
And it's respect.
893
00:52:41,492 --> 00:52:43,785
It's like the time
we spend together,
you know.
894
00:52:43,869 --> 00:52:46,746
And a couple of guys
like you deserve them.
895
00:52:46,914 --> 00:52:50,124
See, we like your style.
So we want to
make a deal with you.
896
00:52:50,209 --> 00:52:51,793
You let us have
a crack at Lisa
897
00:52:51,877 --> 00:52:54,712
and then we'll let
you have Deb and Hilly.
898
00:52:56,882 --> 00:52:58,967
Can you guys keep a secret?
899
00:52:59,051 --> 00:53:00,927
Sure.
Secret?
900
00:53:01,554 --> 00:53:04,430
Look again. It's Gary.
No, no.
901
00:53:04,515 --> 00:53:06,558
It's our boy, Gary.
902
00:53:06,934 --> 00:53:09,602
He's our 16-year-old boy.
903
00:53:09,687 --> 00:53:12,480
I don't know
what the hell you're
talking about, Lucy.
904
00:53:12,565 --> 00:53:14,607
And I want you to shut up.
905
00:53:15,568 --> 00:53:19,153
WYATT: I feel like an asshole.
This had better work.
906
00:53:19,238 --> 00:53:20,947
This is just the blueprint.
Okay, now look.
907
00:53:21,031 --> 00:53:22,073
You like it?
908
00:53:22,116 --> 00:53:23,950
Bigger tits.
Bigger tits.
909
00:53:24,034 --> 00:53:25,368
Go, go, go, go!
910
00:53:25,452 --> 00:53:28,037
Give him the knee shooters.
I don't care.
911
00:53:29,582 --> 00:53:32,083
VOICE: We have
code penetration again.
912
00:53:32,167 --> 00:53:34,460
What the hell's
going on in here?
913
00:53:34,879 --> 00:53:37,338
(THUNDER CLAPPING)
914
00:53:39,633 --> 00:53:41,217
Excuse me, Arthur.
915
00:53:41,302 --> 00:53:43,386
It's Art.
Excuse me, Art.
916
00:53:58,193 --> 00:53:59,485
Oh, shit.
917
00:54:01,947 --> 00:54:05,408
(SCREAMING)
918
00:54:12,750 --> 00:54:14,876
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
919
00:54:14,960 --> 00:54:15,919
Where's Eddie?
920
00:54:16,003 --> 00:54:18,796
Eddie's down in the lab.
He and Grandpa
are working on a new project.
921
00:54:18,881 --> 00:54:20,590
Another invention?
922
00:54:22,468 --> 00:54:24,344
It has something
to do with a robot.
923
00:54:28,557 --> 00:54:31,559
(LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY)
924
00:54:38,067 --> 00:54:39,734
Wyatt, what's going on?
925
00:54:39,818 --> 00:54:41,444
Turn this thing off!
926
00:54:41,528 --> 00:54:43,571
You're going to love it!
How you doing?
927
00:54:43,656 --> 00:54:45,949
I'm shitting in my pants!
928
00:54:56,085 --> 00:54:57,418
(PLAYING PIANO)
929
00:55:25,155 --> 00:55:26,322
(EXCLAIMING)
930
00:55:34,790 --> 00:55:45,383
(SCREAMING)
931
00:56:05,612 --> 00:56:06,946
It worked.
932
00:56:25,132 --> 00:56:27,383
You had to be big shots,
didn't you?
933
00:56:27,468 --> 00:56:29,218
You had to show off.
934
00:56:30,471 --> 00:56:33,097
When are you going to learn
people will like you
for what you are,
935
00:56:33,182 --> 00:56:35,391
not for what you
can give them.
936
00:56:37,311 --> 00:56:39,604
In your race for
power and glory,
937
00:56:39,897 --> 00:56:42,690
you forgot one small detail.
938
00:56:44,318 --> 00:56:46,235
We forgot to
hook up the doll.
939
00:56:46,320 --> 00:56:48,529
You forgot to
hook up the doll.
940
00:57:28,946 --> 00:57:31,155
(GLASS BREAKING)
941
00:57:31,240 --> 00:57:33,241
Something's going
on here, Carmen.
942
00:57:33,325 --> 00:57:36,661
I have a feeling
we're not going
to approve, Henry.
943
00:57:38,288 --> 00:57:41,040
A missile! A missile!
944
00:57:42,042 --> 00:57:44,210
A missile in my house, Gary!
945
00:57:46,463 --> 00:57:48,464
Yeah, this puppy's
for real, all right.
946
00:57:48,549 --> 00:57:50,716
It was an accident.
Simple, you know...
947
00:57:50,801 --> 00:57:53,010
Accident, my ass, Gary!
948
00:57:53,095 --> 00:57:54,303
My parents are coming home.
949
00:57:54,388 --> 00:57:55,513
Chet's coming home.
950
00:57:55,597 --> 00:57:57,557
They're going to freak out!
951
00:57:57,641 --> 00:57:59,142
They're gonna shit egg rolls.
952
00:57:59,226 --> 00:58:01,853
Get out!
Get out! Scat!
953
00:58:01,937 --> 00:58:04,564
Out of here,
you disgusting tramps!
954
00:58:04,648 --> 00:58:06,816
You, you, you hosers!
955
00:58:06,900 --> 00:58:08,776
Out! Out! Out!
956
00:58:08,861 --> 00:58:11,112
My God, cut that out,
would you?
957
00:58:11,405 --> 00:58:13,489
You ought to know better
than to walk into
somebody's house
958
00:58:13,574 --> 00:58:15,867
and start hitting people
with your Rex Harrison hat.
959
00:58:15,951 --> 00:58:18,077
This is my daughter's home.
960
00:58:18,162 --> 00:58:19,704
Who the hell are you?
961
00:58:19,788 --> 00:58:23,499
Well, I'm a very dear,
close personal friend
of your grandson's.
962
00:58:23,584 --> 00:58:25,501
Henry, call the police.
963
00:58:25,586 --> 00:58:28,754
I will.
I'll have you incarcerated.
964
00:58:28,839 --> 00:58:30,756
Here's the deal, folks.
965
00:58:31,008 --> 00:58:34,260
Gary and Wyatt,
they created me
on their computer.
966
00:58:34,344 --> 00:58:38,306
I'm not going to stand here
and listen to this baloney.
967
00:58:38,390 --> 00:58:41,601
He won't, you know.
He doesn't stand for baloney.
968
00:58:42,144 --> 00:58:45,271
Would you mind waiting here?
I won't be a moment.
969
00:58:47,649 --> 00:58:49,609
Have you ever?
970
00:58:50,611 --> 00:58:51,777
Never.
971
00:58:52,779 --> 00:58:56,282
Excuse me, guys.
Wyatt, your grandparents
are downstairs.
972
00:58:56,491 --> 00:58:58,159
Okay. Thanks, Lis.
973
00:59:02,080 --> 00:59:04,040
Lisa!
Yes?
974
00:59:04,124 --> 00:59:06,167
Where are my grandparents?
975
00:59:06,752 --> 00:59:09,962
Wyatt, your kitchen is blue.
You want to try one?
976
00:59:10,047 --> 00:59:11,881
Where are my
grandparents, Lisa?
977
00:59:11,965 --> 00:59:14,300
They're all taken care of.
Okay?
978
00:59:21,183 --> 00:59:23,434
You're going to
love this one.
979
00:59:29,358 --> 00:59:30,566
Are they all right?
980
00:59:30,651 --> 00:59:31,943
They're fine.
981
00:59:32,027 --> 00:59:34,487
In fact,
they're better than fine.
982
00:59:34,821 --> 00:59:36,822
They're not aging anymore.
983
00:59:37,157 --> 00:59:38,991
See? They're smiling.
984
00:59:40,661 --> 00:59:43,246
Lisa, if any more of
his relatives drop by,
985
00:59:43,330 --> 00:59:46,082
we'll be upstairs in
the bathroom, okay?
986
00:59:46,166 --> 00:59:48,167
That's pretty sick, Lis.
987
00:59:48,627 --> 00:59:52,004
Those guys really need
some self-confidence.
988
00:59:53,131 --> 00:59:54,757
A challenge.
989
00:59:54,841 --> 00:59:58,594
Something that'll bring out
their inner strength
and courage.
990
01:00:03,517 --> 01:00:05,351
I'm so bloody clever.
991
01:00:09,022 --> 01:00:10,064
Now!
992
01:00:10,274 --> 01:00:14,026
(ENGINE REVVING)
993
01:00:15,153 --> 01:00:16,946
(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING)
994
01:00:33,880 --> 01:00:35,548
(ALL SCREAMING)
995
01:00:46,977 --> 01:00:48,102
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
996
01:00:58,739 --> 01:01:00,489
This Bud's for you.
997
01:01:08,498 --> 01:01:09,832
This party's lame, Max.
998
01:01:09,916 --> 01:01:11,709
What about the girls?
999
01:01:12,878 --> 01:01:14,420
Girls, shmirls.
1000
01:01:35,942 --> 01:01:38,652
Lisa! What's going on?
1001
01:01:59,216 --> 01:02:01,300
Gary! Gary!
1002
01:02:01,385 --> 01:02:03,636
Gary, listen to me.
1003
01:02:03,720 --> 01:02:06,138
There are motorcycles
in my house!
1004
01:02:07,891 --> 01:02:10,518
Wyatt, there are
killer mutants in
your house, okay?
1005
01:02:30,914 --> 01:02:32,832
Screw the house.
Screw the house.
1006
01:03:12,873 --> 01:03:14,290
Guys, you have
uninvited guests.
1007
01:03:14,374 --> 01:03:16,333
I think you better come out
and ask them to leave.
1008
01:03:16,418 --> 01:03:17,835
They're getting
pretty rowdy.
1009
01:03:23,592 --> 01:03:27,219
This is an excellent chance
for you to prove your
bravery and courage.
1010
01:03:27,304 --> 01:03:29,180
Those are outdated concepts,
all right?
1011
01:03:29,264 --> 01:03:30,598
Excuse us.
1012
01:03:31,725 --> 01:03:34,018
Don't let John Wayne
hear you say that.
1013
01:03:34,102 --> 01:03:36,228
The man is dead, Lisa, okay?
1014
01:03:37,898 --> 01:03:40,608
Well, so are you
if you don't deal
with this situation.
1015
01:03:40,692 --> 01:03:42,234
(GLASS BREAKING)
1016
01:03:43,445 --> 01:03:45,070
No, thanks.
No, thanks.
1017
01:03:47,657 --> 01:03:50,367
WYATT: Gary, do you feel
like a chicken?
1018
01:03:50,452 --> 01:03:54,205
Wyatt, if I could shoot
an egg out my ass
right now, I would.
1019
01:03:55,999 --> 01:03:58,417
Well, what about
all these people?
1020
01:03:58,502 --> 01:04:00,669
Will they think
we're cowards?
1021
01:04:02,088 --> 01:04:03,130
I don't know.
1022
01:04:03,215 --> 01:04:06,008
Look, we can deal
with shame, okay?
Death is a much deeper issue.
1023
01:04:06,092 --> 01:04:09,720
(MAN GROWLING)
1024
01:04:32,786 --> 01:04:34,537
We're going to get
you guys some drinks.
1025
01:04:34,621 --> 01:04:36,205
You look like a Scotch man.
You want some...
1026
01:04:36,289 --> 01:04:38,040
We're gonna get some stuff.
1027
01:04:39,793 --> 01:04:42,711
Is this your party?
1028
01:04:46,633 --> 01:04:48,175
Well, kind of.
1029
01:04:48,260 --> 01:04:50,678
I don't know if you
can call it a party.
1030
01:04:50,762 --> 01:04:52,763
It's just a few friends.
1031
01:04:52,847 --> 01:04:54,306
How come
1032
01:04:55,642 --> 01:05:01,146
two unpopular dicks like you
is having a party?
1033
01:05:01,231 --> 01:05:02,231
(ALL LAUGHING)
1034
01:05:02,315 --> 01:05:04,733
I don't know.
I mean, I guess I
was just asking myself
1035
01:05:04,818 --> 01:05:06,110
that very question.
And unlike dicks,
1036
01:05:06,194 --> 01:05:07,236
sometimes do
the weirdest things.
1037
01:05:07,320 --> 01:05:08,445
Look, we're very sorry.
We're...
1038
01:05:08,488 --> 01:05:11,991
I don't know.
How would you like
all your friends here
1039
01:05:12,075 --> 01:05:18,080
to know that you wear
a bra on your heads?
1040
01:05:18,164 --> 01:05:21,041
(ALL LAUGHING)
1041
01:05:26,298 --> 01:05:29,341
Tossed off into
any good books lately,
have we?
1042
01:05:34,055 --> 01:05:37,683
You two can't
even take a shower
1043
01:05:38,977 --> 01:05:41,061
with a beautiful woman
1044
01:05:41,896 --> 01:05:44,690
without wearing your jeans!
1045
01:05:44,774 --> 01:05:47,693
(ALL LAUGHING)
1046
01:05:53,199 --> 01:05:54,241
You!
1047
01:05:55,493 --> 01:05:56,869
Come here!
1048
01:05:59,247 --> 01:06:00,372
Now!
1049
01:06:19,851 --> 01:06:20,976
Prepare to die, Wyatt.
1050
01:06:21,061 --> 01:06:22,978
Gary, I can't wait to die.
1051
01:06:23,063 --> 01:06:24,146
We are gonna kick...
1052
01:06:24,230 --> 01:06:25,522
Ass.
1053
01:06:25,607 --> 01:06:28,609
Okay. This is war.
1054
01:06:28,693 --> 01:06:32,655
Hands off the girls.
Let's leave the girls
out of this. Hands off.
1055
01:06:32,739 --> 01:06:33,989
(LAUGHING)
1056
01:06:34,407 --> 01:06:36,742
I said hands off! Now!
1057
01:06:47,629 --> 01:06:49,880
Why don't you
shut up, bitch?
1058
01:06:55,762 --> 01:06:58,681
And as for your ugly ass,
let me tell you something.
1059
01:06:58,765 --> 01:07:02,351
You don't come
into my friend's house
with your faggot friends,
1060
01:07:02,435 --> 01:07:04,853
driving your motorbikes
all over his floors,
1061
01:07:04,938 --> 01:07:07,272
breaking windows,
making a mess,
stinking up the place.
1062
01:07:07,357 --> 01:07:09,566
And believe me,
you do stink.
1063
01:07:13,655 --> 01:07:16,073
And here's what's
going to happen.
1064
01:07:16,157 --> 01:07:17,908
You're going to
let go of the girls
1065
01:07:17,992 --> 01:07:21,161
and you're going to apologize
to all these people.
1066
01:07:21,454 --> 01:07:22,996
And you're going
to get on your bikes
1067
01:07:23,081 --> 01:07:25,290
and pedal your ugly
asses out of here.
1068
01:07:25,375 --> 01:07:27,960
(ALL LAUGHING)
1069
01:07:28,962 --> 01:07:32,923
So now, we're gentlemen,
so we're gonna
give you a choice.
1070
01:07:33,007 --> 01:07:35,259
Yeah, you can leave
in peace...
1071
01:07:39,472 --> 01:07:41,473
Or you can stay and die.
1072
01:07:53,737 --> 01:07:55,320
Choice is yours.
1073
01:08:34,652 --> 01:08:36,195
Get out of here.
1074
01:08:41,409 --> 01:08:44,161
Beg your pardon.
You have a lovely home.
1075
01:08:45,371 --> 01:08:48,207
Terribly sorry. Call me.
We'll have lunch.
1076
01:08:49,209 --> 01:08:51,376
Can we keep this between us?
1077
01:08:53,171 --> 01:08:55,464
I'd hate to lose
my teaching job.
1078
01:09:00,386 --> 01:09:01,887
God bless you.
1079
01:09:13,066 --> 01:09:14,233
I can't believe...
You know...
1080
01:09:14,317 --> 01:09:16,568
Is everyone all right?
I just want to know.
Everyone's...
1081
01:09:16,653 --> 01:09:18,779
This is so exciting.
You know, we're heroes.
1082
01:09:18,863 --> 01:09:21,031
These guys came
into your house
and we showed them down.
1083
01:09:21,115 --> 01:09:22,658
I can't believe this.
You know what we did?
1084
01:09:22,742 --> 01:09:24,785
You and me,
we saved all
these people, Wyatt.
1085
01:09:24,869 --> 01:09:25,869
You don't understand that.
1086
01:09:25,954 --> 01:09:28,288
We're heroes. This could mean
a guest shot on Phil Donahue.
1087
01:09:28,373 --> 01:09:29,706
I don't know.
But this is exciting, man!
1088
01:09:29,791 --> 01:09:30,791
Gary!
What?
1089
01:09:30,875 --> 01:09:32,668
Where the hell did
you get that thing?
1090
01:09:32,752 --> 01:09:34,294
Squirt gun, man. That's it.
1091
01:09:34,379 --> 01:09:35,754
(GUN FIRING)
1092
01:09:45,557 --> 01:09:47,099
That's my boys.
1093
01:09:58,611 --> 01:10:00,612
What a weird night, huh?
1094
01:10:03,074 --> 01:10:05,784
You really weren't
afraid of those guys?
1095
01:10:08,705 --> 01:10:10,205
I was scared.
1096
01:10:11,249 --> 01:10:12,958
But what could I do?
1097
01:10:20,633 --> 01:10:22,259
It's probably
a good idea for me not to
1098
01:10:22,343 --> 01:10:24,887
ask too many questions
about tonight.
1099
01:10:25,305 --> 01:10:26,555
Probably.
1100
01:10:26,639 --> 01:10:29,266
This is a sort of
a night of weird shit.
1101
01:10:29,350 --> 01:10:32,936
I was wondering if I can
ask you something
kind of strange?
1102
01:10:38,985 --> 01:10:40,694
Would you kiss me?
1103
01:10:43,531 --> 01:10:45,115
What about lan?
1104
01:10:48,661 --> 01:10:50,495
We all make mistakes.
1105
01:10:53,541 --> 01:10:56,251
Okay.
1106
01:10:57,837 --> 01:10:59,338
Where do you want it?
1107
01:11:02,926 --> 01:11:04,968
Can I ask you a question?
1108
01:11:05,803 --> 01:11:06,929
Yeah.
1109
01:11:07,931 --> 01:11:10,015
How do you feel about Lisa?
1110
01:11:11,142 --> 01:11:12,517
I love her.
1111
01:11:14,354 --> 01:11:16,396
And that's what I figured.
1112
01:11:17,231 --> 01:11:18,398
But...
1113
01:11:20,693 --> 01:11:22,945
I mean, it's definitely
a different kind of love.
1114
01:11:23,029 --> 01:11:26,698
You know, it's more
sisterly, you know.
1115
01:11:26,783 --> 01:11:28,867
Like big sisterly, kind of.
1116
01:11:29,869 --> 01:11:31,787
But she's so beautiful.
1117
01:11:35,124 --> 01:11:37,376
Yeah, she's really beautiful.
1118
01:11:38,503 --> 01:11:40,128
And her body is...
1119
01:11:41,297 --> 01:11:42,839
It's gorgeous.
1120
01:11:43,758 --> 01:11:45,509
It's a nice figure.
1121
01:11:46,719 --> 01:11:47,844
So...
1122
01:11:50,848 --> 01:11:53,600
I mean, what would I
be compared to her?
1123
01:11:54,644 --> 01:12:00,357
Deb, Lisa is everything
I ever wanted in a girl
1124
01:12:02,235 --> 01:12:04,361
before I knew
what I wanted.
1125
01:12:05,196 --> 01:12:07,739
I know that if I
could do it again,
1126
01:12:09,075 --> 01:12:11,243
I'd make her just like you.
1127
01:12:14,080 --> 01:12:15,247
Honest.
1128
01:12:24,424 --> 01:12:27,300
Dead honest. I'm like...
I... You know, I...
1129
01:12:27,635 --> 01:12:29,594
I gotta tell you 'cause
I'm really honest
when I say that.
1130
01:12:29,679 --> 01:12:32,180
I'm so very honest.
I mean that.
1131
01:12:46,029 --> 01:12:49,114
(CAR APPROACHING)
1132
01:13:23,816 --> 01:13:25,317
What the hell?
1133
01:13:27,987 --> 01:13:29,780
That little bastard.
1134
01:13:32,742 --> 01:13:35,035
Please don't let him
have messed up my room.
1135
01:13:35,119 --> 01:13:37,579
If my room's okay,
I won't kill him. I promise.
1136
01:13:37,663 --> 01:13:39,831
I'll just hurt him real bad.
1137
01:14:08,986 --> 01:14:10,195
Freeze.
1138
01:14:12,031 --> 01:14:13,198
Chet!
1139
01:14:13,866 --> 01:14:15,575
Where's my brother?
1140
01:14:16,285 --> 01:14:17,285
(WINCES)
1141
01:14:20,331 --> 01:14:21,790
I don't know.
1142
01:14:22,542 --> 01:14:24,626
You're dead meat, pilgrim.
1143
01:14:29,048 --> 01:14:31,591
Chet, Chet, Chet, Chet, Chet,
that's her nose. Come on.
1144
01:14:31,676 --> 01:14:33,802
Now, look, she has
nothing to do with it.
1145
01:14:33,886 --> 01:14:36,388
Okay. You die.
1146
01:14:37,140 --> 01:14:39,975
She walks out of here
with a severe limp.
1147
01:14:47,817 --> 01:14:49,317
I'll be back.
1148
01:14:54,699 --> 01:14:57,117
That's Wyatt's
older brother, Chet.
1149
01:14:57,410 --> 01:14:58,702
He's kind of an asshole.
1150
01:15:01,873 --> 01:15:03,331
Oh, hi, Chet.
1151
01:15:03,749 --> 01:15:07,043
What the hell is
going on around here?
1152
01:15:07,128 --> 01:15:09,087
Chet, I'm sorry,
it was an accident.
1153
01:15:09,172 --> 01:15:11,423
An accident? An accident?
1154
01:15:12,258 --> 01:15:15,886
Do you realize
it's snowing in my room,
God damn it?
1155
01:15:16,679 --> 01:15:18,680
Some real weird
shit happened, Chet.
Some real weird shit.
1156
01:15:18,764 --> 01:15:22,559
You don't have to be a genius
to figure that out,
monkey dick.
1157
01:15:24,478 --> 01:15:26,688
Start talking, little man.
1158
01:15:26,772 --> 01:15:28,481
Look, Chet, it's
a real long story.
1159
01:15:28,566 --> 01:15:30,358
Gary and I were messing
around with the computer
Friday night,
1160
01:15:30,443 --> 01:15:31,776
and we decided
to make a woman.
And when we did,
1161
01:15:31,861 --> 01:15:33,195
she went crazy
and she messed up
the whole house.
1162
01:15:33,279 --> 01:15:36,364
Don't smart-mouth me,
you wormy little shit!
1163
01:15:36,449 --> 01:15:37,908
Why don't you
just leave him alone?
1164
01:15:37,992 --> 01:15:40,368
Stay out of this, bimbo.
This is a family matter.
1165
01:15:40,453 --> 01:15:44,247
Chet, just let me find Lisa.
She can explain everything.
1166
01:15:44,332 --> 01:15:47,626
She'll clear
everything up, Chet.
I swear. Chet.
1167
01:15:47,710 --> 01:15:52,130
You can have my college money
and my social security, Chet.
1168
01:15:58,012 --> 01:16:02,224
So, you guys think you can
pull one over on me, huh?
1169
01:16:02,308 --> 01:16:03,683
Huh?
1170
01:16:03,768 --> 01:16:07,562
You got everybody synched
to the same bullshit story.
1171
01:16:07,647 --> 01:16:10,982
This isn't bullshit.
This is a Pershing
missile, Chip.
1172
01:16:11,275 --> 01:16:12,651
It's Chet.
1173
01:16:13,194 --> 01:16:14,819
My name is Chet.
1174
01:16:16,864 --> 01:16:19,950
And I didn't think
it was a whale's dick, honey.
1175
01:16:20,034 --> 01:16:21,743
(BURPS)
1176
01:16:23,829 --> 01:16:25,705
Hi, Nanny. Hi, Grampy.
1177
01:16:27,833 --> 01:16:30,085
I'm not a moron,
you know. I...
1178
01:16:34,173 --> 01:16:36,174
Was that my grandparents?
1179
01:16:41,514 --> 01:16:42,639
Are they dead?
1180
01:16:42,723 --> 01:16:44,891
Oh, no.
They're just resting.
1181
01:16:45,476 --> 01:16:47,435
What are they doing in here?
1182
01:16:47,520 --> 01:16:49,521
LISA: I put them in there.
1183
01:16:49,981 --> 01:16:52,816
I didn't want the boys
to get into trouble.
1184
01:16:53,276 --> 01:16:56,736
And quite frankly,
they weren't having
a very good time at the party.
1185
01:16:56,821 --> 01:16:58,446
CHET: Not having a good time?
1186
01:16:58,531 --> 01:17:02,701
Do you think
they're having a good time
being catatonic in a closet?
1187
01:17:03,703 --> 01:17:07,664
Do you have any idea
how disrespectful that is?
1188
01:17:09,083 --> 01:17:13,712
Boy, I wouldn't
give a squirt of piss
for your ass right now.
1189
01:17:19,176 --> 01:17:22,220
Okay, that's quite enough.
You guys get the girls home.
1190
01:17:22,305 --> 01:17:26,474
Wyatt, take the Porsche.
Gary, you take the Ferrari.
1191
01:17:26,559 --> 01:17:27,976
The Ferrari?
1192
01:17:29,103 --> 01:17:31,062
I want to be alone
with Chet here.
1193
01:17:31,147 --> 01:17:33,148
Good to see you again, Chet.
Get out of here!
1194
01:17:33,232 --> 01:17:35,275
Come on, take your
little hussies home!
1195
01:17:35,359 --> 01:17:38,028
Their parents are
probably worried sick.
1196
01:17:40,573 --> 01:17:45,869
Lady, I want to get to
the bottom of this, asafp.
1197
01:17:45,953 --> 01:17:47,412
Oh, so do I.
1198
01:17:50,166 --> 01:17:53,209
But first, I'd like
to butter your muffin.
1199
01:17:54,045 --> 01:17:55,879
Why do you have to
be such a wanker?
1200
01:17:55,963 --> 01:17:58,381
Because I get off on it.
1201
01:17:58,466 --> 01:18:02,510
Now I want you to promise
that you'll keep
your big mouth shut
1202
01:18:02,595 --> 01:18:05,305
about everything
that has happened here
this weekend.
1203
01:18:05,389 --> 01:18:09,100
And I want you to
treat Wyatt and Gary
with dignity and respect.
1204
01:18:09,185 --> 01:18:10,602
Oh, really?
1205
01:18:11,020 --> 01:18:12,604
Yeah. Oh, really.
1206
01:18:14,315 --> 01:18:16,900
I can be
a real serious bitch
1207
01:18:17,943 --> 01:18:20,278
if I don't get
what I want.
1208
01:18:21,739 --> 01:18:23,865
Hit me with your best shot.
1209
01:18:29,830 --> 01:18:31,748
How fast are you going?
1210
01:18:32,458 --> 01:18:33,750
About 35.
1211
01:18:41,342 --> 01:18:42,467
(SIREN WAILING)
1212
01:18:45,513 --> 01:18:47,514
Wait. This can't be right.
1213
01:18:47,598 --> 01:18:49,349
Are you looking at
the rpms?
1214
01:18:49,433 --> 01:18:52,310
No. I think I'm looking
at about 50 tickets.
1215
01:18:58,317 --> 01:19:00,151
(SIREN WAILING)
1216
01:19:08,202 --> 01:19:09,285
Bye!
1217
01:19:39,692 --> 01:19:41,693
God damn it! Stupid train!
1218
01:19:42,027 --> 01:19:43,194
Oh, my.
1219
01:19:45,197 --> 01:19:46,739
That was great!
1220
01:19:56,041 --> 01:19:57,417
You son of a bitch!
1221
01:19:57,501 --> 01:20:00,879
Al, Al! Al, that was Gary!
1222
01:20:01,755 --> 01:20:03,882
Who is this Gary character?
1223
01:20:06,719 --> 01:20:09,304
I had a really
great time last night.
1224
01:20:10,848 --> 01:20:14,392
I'll probably be grounded
for a month or so, but...
1225
01:20:15,895 --> 01:20:17,562
I'll wait for you.
1226
01:20:53,349 --> 01:20:54,682
Hilly!
1227
01:20:55,309 --> 01:20:56,684
I love you!
1228
01:21:04,276 --> 01:21:05,610
All right!
1229
01:21:11,283 --> 01:21:13,201
I want to thank you
for a great night.
1230
01:21:13,285 --> 01:21:14,702
Same here.
1231
01:21:17,122 --> 01:21:19,832
Deb, I have kind of
a confession to make.
1232
01:21:23,629 --> 01:21:25,630
I'm really not this cool.
1233
01:21:27,299 --> 01:21:28,967
That's not my car.
1234
01:21:29,343 --> 01:21:31,135
This is not my suit.
1235
01:21:32,096 --> 01:21:35,014
I mean, none of those
people were my friends.
1236
01:21:35,558 --> 01:21:37,976
Why are you telling me
all of this?
1237
01:21:39,937 --> 01:21:42,855
Because I want you to
like me for what I am.
1238
01:21:43,148 --> 01:21:45,316
Whatever you are, I like it.
1239
01:22:07,339 --> 01:22:09,132
I'd better get going.
1240
01:22:10,718 --> 01:22:12,468
'Cause Wyatt and I still
have to deal with Chet.
1241
01:22:13,053 --> 01:22:14,762
Quit screwing around!
1242
01:22:14,847 --> 01:22:17,682
This isn't funny,
you stupid bitch!
1243
01:22:18,183 --> 01:22:20,977
Oh, now careful, Chet.
Don't make me angry.
1244
01:22:21,312 --> 01:22:22,478
Sorry.
1245
01:22:25,941 --> 01:22:27,483
That's better.
1246
01:22:28,027 --> 01:22:31,070
Would you please
turn me back to normal,
please?
1247
01:22:31,447 --> 01:22:33,656
I haven't done
anything to you.
1248
01:22:34,158 --> 01:22:36,367
No, but you've done
plenty to your brother.
1249
01:22:36,452 --> 01:22:37,869
Like what?
1250
01:22:38,454 --> 01:22:41,623
Well, let me see.
You've nagged him,
harassed him,
1251
01:22:41,707 --> 01:22:44,626
suppressed him,
kept him in fear of you.
1252
01:22:44,710 --> 01:22:46,544
Extorted money from him.
1253
01:22:46,629 --> 01:22:48,963
It's done out of love.
1254
01:22:49,048 --> 01:22:52,634
Just for that I
ought to give you
a set of elephant balls.
1255
01:22:52,718 --> 01:22:55,178
(EXCLAIMS)
1256
01:22:58,682 --> 01:23:02,644
Give me your word
that you'll leave
Wyatt and Gary alone
1257
01:23:02,728 --> 01:23:04,812
and I'll change you back.
1258
01:23:04,897 --> 01:23:06,731
Oh, all right.
1259
01:23:07,316 --> 01:23:08,983
Shake on it, huh?
1260
01:23:11,445 --> 01:23:13,571
No, thanks. I'd rather not.
1261
01:23:14,948 --> 01:23:16,991
Wait! Where are you going?
1262
01:23:17,910 --> 01:23:20,328
Well, I have to go
and get changed.
1263
01:23:20,412 --> 01:23:21,663
What about me?
1264
01:23:21,747 --> 01:23:22,789
What about you?
You'll be fine.
1265
01:23:22,873 --> 01:23:25,416
It just takes a little while
for the effect
to wear off, okay?
1266
01:23:38,305 --> 01:23:39,430
Well?
1267
01:23:40,474 --> 01:23:41,933
I'm in love.
1268
01:23:42,893 --> 01:23:44,143
It's great, isn't it?
1269
01:23:44,228 --> 01:23:45,520
The best.
1270
01:23:45,813 --> 01:23:47,939
You know,
I'll tell you, Wyatt,
1271
01:23:48,023 --> 01:23:50,316
I think things are
turning around for us.
1272
01:23:50,401 --> 01:23:51,609
I mean it.
1273
01:23:51,694 --> 01:23:53,528
Okay, what about Lisa?
1274
01:23:57,658 --> 01:24:01,077
Well, I think
we're gonna have to
have a talk with her.
1275
01:24:01,620 --> 01:24:03,538
Think she'll understand?
1276
01:24:04,331 --> 01:24:06,082
I think so. I mean,
1277
01:24:07,126 --> 01:24:09,794
I sure as hell
wouldn't want to date you.
1278
01:24:11,296 --> 01:24:13,506
You're not my type,
you know.
1279
01:24:20,139 --> 01:24:21,514
WYATT: Chet?
1280
01:24:22,307 --> 01:24:23,391
Chet?
1281
01:24:25,394 --> 01:24:26,769
Hi, dudes!
1282
01:24:31,108 --> 01:24:32,734
I'm sorry, Wyatt.
1283
01:24:33,485 --> 01:24:36,863
I'm sorry for being
such a shit to you
all these years.
1284
01:24:37,406 --> 01:24:40,700
And, gee, well,
I want you to know that
1285
01:24:41,785 --> 01:24:43,161
I love you.
1286
01:24:43,829 --> 01:24:46,038
(BURPING LOUDLY)
1287
01:24:46,165 --> 01:24:47,415
(LAUGHS)
1288
01:24:48,417 --> 01:24:50,209
That's nasty, Wyatt.
1289
01:24:51,295 --> 01:24:52,962
That's Chet, Gary.
1290
01:24:53,672 --> 01:24:54,839
(FLY BUZZING)
1291
01:24:55,174 --> 01:24:56,507
Hey, hey.
1292
01:25:06,018 --> 01:25:07,393
Oh, my God!
1293
01:25:10,564 --> 01:25:11,939
WYATT: Lisa?
1294
01:25:12,024 --> 01:25:13,274
In here.
1295
01:25:14,026 --> 01:25:15,109
Lisa.
1296
01:25:15,527 --> 01:25:16,861
LISA: Yeah?
1297
01:25:17,154 --> 01:25:18,446
You saw Chet?
1298
01:25:18,530 --> 01:25:19,906
Yes, I did.
1299
01:25:20,616 --> 01:25:22,492
WYATT: You responsible?
1300
01:25:23,660 --> 01:25:24,994
Yes, I am.
1301
01:25:25,078 --> 01:25:27,538
Lisa, we can't have him
like that.
1302
01:25:28,874 --> 01:25:30,666
It'd ruin Christmas.
1303
01:25:32,085 --> 01:25:34,462
Listen, he's gonna be
fine in half an hour.
1304
01:25:34,546 --> 01:25:36,964
He's not going to
spoil Christmas.
1305
01:25:38,050 --> 01:25:41,052
And he's not going to
bug you anymore, either.
1306
01:25:41,428 --> 01:25:42,970
(CLEARING THROAT)
1307
01:25:44,056 --> 01:25:46,724
Lisa, we have to
have a talk with you.
1308
01:25:47,726 --> 01:25:49,560
What's on your mind?
1309
01:25:50,062 --> 01:25:52,897
I really don't know
how to say this to you.
1310
01:25:53,857 --> 01:25:56,275
You guys found
girlfriends, right?
1311
01:25:58,362 --> 01:26:00,321
Fell in love
with the two girls
1312
01:26:00,405 --> 01:26:02,573
and they fell
in love with you.
1313
01:26:03,367 --> 01:26:05,743
That's all I ever
wanted for you.
1314
01:26:06,495 --> 01:26:08,120
You're not hurt?
1315
01:26:09,748 --> 01:26:11,541
Yeah, sure I'm hurt.
1316
01:26:12,626 --> 01:26:14,669
But I wouldn't change it.
1317
01:26:16,964 --> 01:26:20,967
I'm really just getting off
seeing you two guys
straightened out.
1318
01:26:27,975 --> 01:26:29,267
(SIGHING)
1319
01:26:30,769 --> 01:26:32,228
I have to go.
1320
01:26:51,748 --> 01:26:53,791
I've had a wonderful time.
1321
01:27:04,344 --> 01:27:05,469
Lisa.
1322
01:27:08,515 --> 01:27:09,640
Bye.
1323
01:27:31,538 --> 01:27:33,539
(CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING)
1324
01:28:28,095 --> 01:28:29,220
Boys?
1325
01:28:30,514 --> 01:28:31,889
We're home!
1326
01:28:37,062 --> 01:28:38,521
Hi, Mr. Donnelly.
How are you?
1327
01:28:38,605 --> 01:28:39,605
Nice to see you.
Hi, honey.
1328
01:28:39,690 --> 01:28:40,982
Nice to see you.
1329
01:28:41,066 --> 01:28:43,734
Dad, hi.
No, no, no, no, no.
Like a man.
1330
01:28:44,611 --> 01:28:47,238
So, what did you guys
do this weekend?
1331
01:28:48,198 --> 01:28:49,323
Not much.
1332
01:28:49,408 --> 01:28:51,158
Just hung around the house.
You know.
1333
01:28:51,243 --> 01:28:55,162
Daddy had this crazy notion
you guys might throw a party
1334
01:28:55,747 --> 01:28:57,665
or do something nutty.
1335
01:28:57,749 --> 01:28:58,833
Shit.
1336
01:28:59,167 --> 01:29:00,334
Not us.
Not here.
1337
01:29:00,419 --> 01:29:01,919
No way.
No way.
1338
01:29:09,594 --> 01:29:12,680
(BELL RINGING)
1339
01:29:14,599 --> 01:29:17,852
(GUYS CHATTERING)
1340
01:29:19,938 --> 01:29:21,939
(WHISTLE BLOWING)
1341
01:29:24,151 --> 01:29:25,151
(SHUSHING)
1342
01:29:46,381 --> 01:29:47,798
Okay.
1343
01:29:48,967 --> 01:29:50,760
Drop and give me 20.
1344
01:29:54,222 --> 01:29:56,974
(POP MUSIC PLAYING)
1344
01:29:57,305 --> 01:30:03,328
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