All language subtitles for Instinct.US.S01E04

My name is Dylan Reinhart.
Not too long ago,

I was an operative in the CIA
known as Agent Reinhart.

When I left the Agency
and started teaching,

I became Professor Reinhart.

I wrote a book about abnormal behavior

and criminals, which was so successful

a serial killer used it
as clues for his murders.

That's when the
New York Police Department

reached out to me to help catch him.

Which I did, so they hired me,

and I became Consultant Reinhart.

So now I'm working with this woman,

Detective Lizzie Needham

of the homicide division,
catching killers.

Looks like I need a new name.

Don't they call you Professor Psychopath?

Our ability to glide

from what society deems normal

to what we've defined as abnormal

is in part because we carry inside us

versions of ourselves
as the children we once were.

All it takes is the right person,

the right place or word

to cleave us open
and have that child emerge

in all its glorious joy,
selfishness and anger.

It can push us to do things
we normally would not,

and I'm not just talking about flossing.

A perfectly loving person

can become a heartless person,

given the right circumstances.

Any idea what's going on in there?

Nope.

Lieutenant's been in there
with her for a while.

Needham.

Okay.

Car seven's clear.

ESU. Bomb Squad.

OEM. FBI.

This isn't good.

We can rule out an accident.

Synced & corrected by -robtor-
www.addic7ed.com

We had an incident
on the R Train earlier today

with multiple fatalities.

We will be withholding the victims' names

until their next of kin
have been notified.

All I can say now is a poisonous gas

was released on that subway.

What exactly the gas was,
how it was released

and who released it
remain unknown at this time.

Conductor Johnson, I'm Detective Needham.

This is my partner, Dylan Reinhart.

Can you tell us what happened?

I've been on the R Train for nine years.

I've never seen anything like this ever.

Anything unusual happen?

I was held in the tunnel by dispatch.

- For how long?
- Almost five minutes.

Train ahead of us had a door malfunction.

Thank you. Get some rest.

So, the passengers were between stations

for around five times longer
than expected.

That's a lifetime when
you're inhaling toxic fumes.

There is no way the killer knew

that the train would have been delayed.

Unless the killer... or killers...
delayed the train.

Either way, the gas had
enough time to damage that pole.

Either way, everyone on that car
is indeed dead.

Maybe not everyone.

- Hey!
- Were you on that train?

Hey, hey. You okay?

Yeah.

I can smell the gas on his jacket.

Oh, y-you shouldn't have that on you.

It's contaminated.

Can you take it off?

I'm good.

He's not a victim. He's a thief.

Turn around.

I haven't seen one of these

since I was a kid. I found that.

I found all of these.

Found?

Passengers drop crap all the time

when they're rushing to make their train.

Look, I'm not a bad guy.

I just... I work this line.

I-I grab things when I can.

You pick dead people's pockets.

Don't sell yourself short.

You sound like a wonderful guy.

What did you see down there?

I saw the bodies...

bunched in front of the doors.

The Walkman was just laying on
the ground not next to anybody,

so I took it.

And a phone from some guy's hand.

I mean, what was he
gonna do with it, you know?

Okay, come on.

Come on.

Any word on that phone
the pickpocket... picked?

Still waiting for it to be unlocked,

along with all the
other phones from that car.

Anything on the cassette in the Walkman?

The Walkman was broken,

and finding a working
cassette player around here

may be more challenging
than finding the killer.

If there was a specific target
on the train,

maybe the Walkman could give us
a clue as to why.

Or it could be a Duran Duran mix tape.

I happen to have a cassette deck at home.

Oh. In your boom box?

Yes, next to my eight-track.

- What's an eight-track?
- Ooh.

So, probably shouldn't ask
who Duran Duran are?

- No!
- Kidding.

My first Walkman changed my life.

I used to listen to music
on it all the time.

It was my escape.

Was your childhood really that bad?

My mother was busy taking care
of my father.

My father was busy
taking care of his work.

It's not like the bills weren't paid

or there was no food on the table.

Just, I had a cassette player
for my best friend.

Okay, listen up, everybody.

There were 12 victims
on the car, all adults.

Seven of the 12 were from out
of state, one French diplomat.

Still assessing the CCTV footage

from every stop on the line,

and no one has claimed
responsibility... yet.

This is being treated as a terrorist act,

so the FBI will take the lead.

We need to pull together
and sniff out those responsible

and show them and the rest of the world

no one gets to do this to us.

Let's get 'em.

No one claimed responsibility.

Terrorists need credit.

They usually aim for big, splashy targets

with high body counts,

yet this was the last car,
typically the least populated,

of a fairly quiet subway line,

not even at rush hour.

Would now be a bad time

to tell them it's not a terrorist attack?

They unlocked the
phone from the pickpocket.

Belongs to victim Josh Monaz.

Sent a text from the subway:

"Doors closed before I could get off.

Meet you at the usual place."

To a Grace Asher.

It's horrible.

He was an amazing man,
and we were soul mates.

May I ask why you didn't come forward?

Is it because you were

having an affair with the victim?

Having an affair? With Josh?

You aren't wearing a wedding ring,

and all four male victims
were wearing one.

People who want to hide the truth

tend to gesture toward
themselves, as you have done;

play with their hair, as you are doing;

and repeat the question
before answering it,

as you did when I asked you

if you were having an
affair with the victim.

Oh, and as Detective Needham mentioned,

you didn't come forward.

Josh is married,

but not happily.

We were going to a hotel,

and I didn't want anyone to find out.

What happened on the platform?

We were heading for the train,

and Josh was ahead of me.

And then, suddenly,
this guy appears on my left

and barrels into me as he passes.

He knocked my bag down.

All of my things went flying.

What did he look like?

He was skinny, white.

I call out to Josh,
but he's too far ahead.

I look up to see the guy.

He was wearing a backpack,

and he gets onto the same car as Josh.

Just as the doors are
about to close, he hops off

and then jumps onto another car.

J-Josh tries to hold the doors
open for me...

and...

I grab my things, but...

the doors slam shut,
and the train takes off, and...

that was the last time that I...

I'll never see him again.

Do you remember any more detail

about the guy who knocked into you?

He... he had a tattoo, uh...

on his forearm.

It was just a blur,

but I think it was a leaf.

Like...

a marijuana leaf.

We are New Yorkers.

That is why our city
is open for business,

including the subway.

I will be taking the subway
back to city hall,

and I implore my fellow
New Yorkers to do the same.

That's the official public message,

but FBI and DHS are still on high alert.

French diplomat didn't have
any apparent enemies.

No one's standing down yet.

That cassette tape was just a long,

boring lecture about the
history of Central Park.

...and the Olmstead Hotel.

Frederick Law Olmstead
served as the park's...

And turns out that victim's mistress

wasn't as much help with
the sketch artist as we'd hoped.

We struck out looking

for a matching marijuana tattoo
in the tattoo book.

Maybe the FBI had better luck with her.

Speaking of which, there's been
an operational shift overnight.

So, even though we apprehended
a thief and found an eyewitness,

we're being pushed aside?

The Joint Terrorism Task Force
is going to take the lead,

- linking with federal investigators.
- This is a huge case.

I want to catch
the son of a bitch who did this.

You know it's not my call.

Don't worry.

Very few terrorists have motives that are

psychologically complex
or individually nuanced.

Religious zealot, fascist militant...

pretty much the same guy.

Oh, how boring for you.

I do have something for you.

We thought it was
connected to the subway,

but given the negligible
size of the explosive,

we're ruling that out.

Yay. We get the negligible case.

There was a small explosion

at the Central Park Carousel...
one fatality.

It's yours.

There was an explosion around 8:30.

Threw this blue horse and
this guy into the air.

Found some explosives
in the carousel area,

and you got some eyewitnesses over there.

We were on our morning ride.

We got about a block north, and boom.

Kathy called 911.

I passed this.

I don't know if it belonged to the bomber

or if some kid lost it,

but I thought I'd grab it.

You should give him a medal.

He rushed in to save that guy's life.

I just did what any New Yorker would do.

And, anyway, it wasn't enough.

What's your name?

Kyle Adams.

Um, I had a father and son

in my carriage
when I heard the explosion.

I, uh... I'm a hansom cab driver.

The last place a horse should be

is walking around the streets
of New York City.

Shame on you!

We treat our horses better

than most people treat their dogs.

Not to mention, we hit fewer
pedestrians than bicyclists.

If you both don't mind...

Please continue.

Um, I told them they'd have

to walk the rest of the way,
and I rushed to help the man.

- I was too late.
- Thank you.

You can all go.

Officer, can we get this to the lab?

- Absolutely.
- As soon as possible.

Dylan.

Roger.

CIA involved in this?

The Case of the Merry-Go-Round Murder?

Hardly.

I was called in for the subway incident.

That French diplomat who died...

he was DGSE, stationed in Tehran,

and he was under surveillance by us.

I understand Command Ops
took you off the main event.

I can get you reassigned,

stop you from wasting your time here.

In fact, I already made the call.

Hey, it's a big case.

- My car's waiting.
- No, thanks.

Well, figured it was worth a shot.

At least let me take you
and Andrew to dinner tonight.

I'll check in later.

You look pretty good.

Police work suits you.

Who's that?

That...

is my father.

The vic was Cyrus Bryant.
He was one of my Cis when I

was in narcotics. He'd been
cooperating for a while.

Cyrus had been involved in
the ongoing investigation

into two warring drug dealers
vying for uptown traffic.

Looks like he got hit and we lost a CI.

Wouldn't drug lords just shoot a rival?

Why cause a public spectacle
with an explosion?

There's a hole in the back
of this saddle.

Oh, got something for you.

I love when this happens.

- When what happens?
- When I might be wrong.

It keeps me on my toes.

Maybe this is about drugs.

Oh, I give this burst
of humility about three seconds.

Except I don't think it is about drugs.

Ooh! Two seconds.

I mean, why use an explosive?

And such a small one. No.

Something else is going on.

Don't be mad just because
I disagree with you.

You always disagree with me.

And I'm not mad. I'm frustrated.

We had a chance to get
back on the subway case.

You didn't even check
with me before saying no.

My father caught me off guard.

He loves to get in my head.

But he still came here to
offer it and to see you.

No, he came here because

a French diplomat died in the attack.

Maybe he came to the city for that.

Didn't he come to the park for you?

Mm, it's not that simple.

Never is with family.

Maybe you can explain it to me.
I'd like to know.

I wrote a book, Freaks,

which was a best seller,
which got me in People magazine,

which you read three times.

I'm familiar with the book.

I'm not sure my father is.

I don't know if he ever read it.

So ask him.

I'm not sure I want to know the answer.

You shouldn't wonder.

Just ask. Take control.

If he hasn't read it, let him
know how much it bothers you.

It's not such a big deal.
It's just a book.

I'm gonna go and listen
to that cassette again,

see if I missed anything.

- Any leads on the subway case?
- Uh, not that I've heard,

but since I'm not on it, I wouldn't know.

Lizzie, we need your help
with Lieutenant Gooden.

- Why?
- Because you're her friend

and you never do anything wrong.

Yeah, you wouldn't stand
in a "ten items or less" line

- with 11 items.
- You're the ultimate rule follower.

Gee, thanks, guys.

What's wrong?

Lou has locked herself in

the conference room, closed the blinds

and said she is not to be disturbed.

- So don't disturb her.
- No, no, no, no, no, no.

We need you to disturb her, all right?

I'm this close to having a panic attack.

I've seen him have a panic
attack. It's not pretty.

Why is Lou talking to Internal Affairs?

Can you go in and find out?

Lizzie?

Fine.

Don't stand there. Move around.

I'm so sorry.

You look beautiful.

Thank you.

I just need a veil.

Lizzie, meet Olga.

- Olga, Lizzie.
- Hi.

I'm at work when the bridal shop opens,

and I'm still at work after it closes.

Olga was kind enough
to offer to do my fittings

in our conference room.

Everything okay?

Oh, yeah. The guys just thought that you

were meeting with Internal Affairs again.

- Again?
- Yesterday.

Sally, uh, she wasn't here

on, uh, police business yesterday.

She's helping me plan my wedding.

Oh. Okay.

S-Sorry.

Wait, Sal... Sally?

Excuse me, Olga. Do you mind?

Can you just give us a minute, please?

Thanks.

You...

You asked Sally?

Because...

being on her third marriage,
she's got more experience?

You've been really swamped,
and you're doing great work.

We are always swamped.

I asked you to help with my wedding.

I know, but you just went on a date.

You're finally moving on.

Finally...

Okay, I get it.

Sorry that I've been a drag.

Lizzie, you haven't,

but you've had a rough time.

It's not even a year yet since...

You're afraid I'm too fragile?

I just didn't want to stir up
any more pain for you.

Your wedding should have come first.

It should have, but it didn't.

Yeah, you're right. I'm... I get it.

I'm sorry that I barged in on you.

That dress is gonna be perfect.

Uh, if you have a beer that costs

less than $20, I'll take it.

Otherwise, tap water is fine.

These prices are criminal.

Oh, immoral. I would like a triple shot

of your finest tequila,
and could you bring it

as fast as humanly possible, please?

- Right away, sir.
- Thank you.

Wow.

You know when you, uh, walk into a place

or just see it and you
have a physical reaction?

Well, um, all this restaurant is to me

is a repository of
upsetting memories of dinners

- with my dear ol' dad.
- Come on, Dylan.

It's just... it's only dinner.

You're clearly forgetting

the last meal we had with my dad.

You told him you were leaving the CIA.

It's-it's... it's the only
thing he ever wanted for you.

The only thing he thought that
you both had in common.

Of course he wasn't gonna
react well to that news.

Well, he didn't have to be
so... him about it.

Tonight's gonna be different.

There'll be no bad news.

There'll be no news at all, and besides,

there is nothing your
father can say or do

that I can't help you handle.

- There you are.
- Thank you.

Except maybe that.

Welcome back, sir.

What is Lizzie doing here with him?

I invited Lizzie to join us, Dylan.

I thought it'd be nice to have

both of your partners together.

- Andrew.
- Roger.

Your father didn't tell you
he invited me.

Nope. He likes to withhold things.

Heard you gave up law and bought a bar.

Yes, I did. I, uh...

I needed a less sleazy work environment.

Lizzie was just telling me
what it's like working with you.

Oh, I hope she didn't overuse
the word, "lackluster."

You don't have to answer any more

of my father's questions.

My son is a big proponent of secrecy.

- It's genetic.
- Roger,

how long are you in town for?

Until we can close the terrorist attack.

- It's not a terrorist attack.
- Ah...

Dylan likes to be a contrarian.

You mean I like to be right?

Well, hop back on the case and prove it.

My offer still stands.

We have a case.

- You know that.
- Ah, yes.

The Carnage on the Carousel.

Don't do this.

Come back.

Really?

That's why you're here?

Yes, this whole terrorist attack

is a ploy to get me to lure you back.

It wasn't a terrorist attack.

Don't throw your calling away
on this nonsense.

Excuse me.

There's a fire at
the Olmstead Hotel and a body.

- Do you want to go check it out?
- Yes, I do.

Sorry to not eat and run,
but we have some nonsense

to attend to.

- I'm sorry.
- See you.

There's blood on the back of his head.

Maybe the fire was just a cover-up

for killing this guy.

Huh.

They moved the chair and the couch.

Why go to the trouble
of rearranging the furniture,

ripping this place apart,

only to burn it down?

Maybe it's not about the body.

We're homicide cops.

It better be about the body.

People destroy things
because they've projected

their self-hatred onto something outside

which has to be annihilated.

No other vics?

No one else was found here? No kids?

No, just this guy.

So, why the kid's robe?

He destroys a room.

Destroys a carousel horse.

Kid's shoe.

Kid's robe.

Why do all this damage if you're
just gonna kill someone?

Whoever did this wanted
to destroy this place,

much like someone wanted to destroy

that blue carousel horse.

Victims may have been killed,

but I don't think that was the intention.

I think that horse and this room

were the actual targets,

and I think these crimes were
perpetrated by the same person,

and I think he's only just started.

The man who rented out
the Olmstead Suite paid with

a stolen card. They don't
know who the victim was.

Judging from the footage we viewed,

the killer must have known his victim

and invited him in, but he was careful

to keep himself hidden from the cameras.

Could the vic have been in on it?

Maybe.

Possible but unlikely.

What I think is more likely is that

the killer was interrupted
by his visitor,

confronted about what he was doing,

and he had no choice but to silence him.

That's an awfully big leap

with zero evidence to support it.

It is. But the room wasn't trashed

in the way a rock star trashes a room...

chaotic and haphazard.

There was a clear order
to how it was damaged,

and the furniture was rearranged

with a sense of logic.

The clock in the room

was damaged at 9:48.

That's when it stopped.

The victim arrived at 9:55.

The only reason to destroy a room

in the way it was done

is if it had a personal meaning to him.

If he's internally fragmented,
he projects

all the bad stuff about himself
onto these places...

the carousel, the Olmstead room.

You're gonna have to get something
more concrete than that.

- Too negligible?
- Nice one, Lizzie.

How about the robe and the sneaker?

- Both kids' sizes.
- And the carousel.

All childlike stuff.

He could be the Doogie Howser
of murderers,

but he could also be an adult

who is destroying his own memories,

pieces of himself.

"The Doogie Howser of murderers."

Yeah, gonna need more than that.

Lizzie.

Mm-hmm?

Is what happened with us
gonna be a problem for this?

Not for me.

It doesn't mean I've forgotten about it.

I didn't mean to hurt your feelings.

I'm sure you didn't mean to.

I should get back to work.

You know it's Lieutenant Gooden's job

to be unimaginative and irritating?

Yes.

She didn't ask me
to help plan her wedding.

She thought it'd be hard for you.

- Would it?
- Yes, but that's beside the point.

Let me make that choice.

Maybe she didn't want you to have to.

Events, like places, can be
powder kegs for buried emotions.

Lieutenant Gooden was protecting you

from going through the
anguish of grief again.

Even if you know you have to move on,

it doesn't make it any easier.

For the record,
it's aggravating sometimes

how smart you are.

Tell me about it.

"Events, like places..."

What about 'em?

I think he was trying

to destroy his own bad memories,

but why now?

- The tattoo.
- Mm-hmm.

The girl said the subway suspect

- had a tattoo.
- Yeah, like a marijuana plant.

What looks like cannabis
but isn't cannabis?

- I give up.
- A maple leaf.

What is Central Park's symbol?

Look how close they all are.

The carousel, the Olmstead, the subway.

This train leads right to the park.

All of these. It's the same guy.

What is he telling us?

The Walkman was damaged,
but maybe it wasn't from age.

Maybe it was from whatever
was released in that subway car.

Maybe the subway attack
wasn't meant to kill people.

Maybe they were just collateral damage.

Did the FBI ever share the compound

- that was found in that backpack?
- Nope.

But I know someone
who's still on the case.

He gave me his number

at dinner last night.

I thought we consult each other first.

Oh, we do?

So... you and your dad.

You and me, we do this
because we can't turn it off.

It's who we are.

My father's the same way,

except in his mind, saving lives,

protecting people, exists in a hierarchy.

The more people you save,
the more of a hero you are.

So being a cop isn't good enough?

Oh, nothing I did ever was.

First of all, it was
my ability with music.

Then it was because I didn't
like girls the way he did.

Our relationship was like
a series of little threads.

Each day, he'd pull one until who I was

had all these little holes.

I'm so sorry.

True story.

Do you mind if I call him?

See what's in the backpack?

Thank you for asking.

Your father said the chemical

in the subway attack was chlorine.

A high concentration could be fatal

within a few minutes of exposure.

It's also a corrosive gas
that can destroy metal.

He used chlorine
to damage the subway car.

The same way he destroyed
part of that carousel

and the hotel room.

Places.

Had that train not stopped unexpectedly,

those subway riders
would probably have lived.

You happy now?

Why would I be happy?

You got your wish.

We're back on the subway case.

So, this is weird.

The vic in the hotel didn't die
from smoke inhalation.

The signs point to blunt-force
trauma being the cause of death.

What's weird about that?

His blood panel showed
leptospirosis in his system.

What's weird about that?

Leptospirosis is a bacterial infection

that can infect people
who've come into contact

with cattle, pigs and horses.

There aren't too many cattle
or pigs in New York City.

- Horses!
- Horses!

We were told you're
friends with Kyle Adams.

Do you know him?

Kyle's not working today.

That's our horse, the blue one...
the one that was blown up.

- Is that you?
- Uh, no.

This is Kyle's cab.
Why isn't he working today?

It's his birthday.

Do you know where he might be?

No, but he lives above the stables.

Police.

Uh, w-we need to talk to Kyle Adams.

I gave Kyle the day off.

Are any of your drivers missing?

Uh, Fritz.

I haven't seen him since yesterday.

Is he okay?

Is this Fritz?

Oh, my God.

What happened?

We're still piecing things together.

Does Kyle have any tattoos?

On his forearm. A leaf.

We're gonna need to see Kyle's apartment.

Look at these.

The crime scenes.

And I'll bet Kyle was at every one.

Terence Adams.

Kyle's father?

Why do I know that name?

Oh, Terence Adams led the restoration

of Central Park in the '80s.

That's whose voice was on the Walkman.

Kyle's dad.

It didn't belong to a tourist.
It was Kyle's.

- Explains Kyle's connection to the park.
- Uh-huh.

The city thought
of Mr. Adams as a savior.

Seemed to have it all.

Until he committed suicide
28 years ago today.

That would explain why now.

Oh.

He killed himself on Kyle's birthday.

It's the logic of someone
with arrested development.

He's thinking like a seven-year-old.

The Walkman,

the sneaker, the bathrobe.

They weren't just found at those scenes.

They were left there by Kyle.

Tributes.

Sacred last memories with his dad

that now he's letting go.

It's a suicide mission.

Just like his dad

on the very same day,

at the very same age.

So that's that smell.

It's not horse dung.

It's lawn fertilizer.

With ammonium nitrate... the same thing

McVeigh used in Oklahoma City.

Kyle's planning something big.

The question is... where?

Uh, did-did it say
where his father killed himself?

He jumped off the Brooklyn Bridge,

but Kyle wasn't there to catch him.

That photo, with the bridge
in the background...

his father's office.

It's my bet that Kyle will want

to destroy that memory, too,
and watch it being destroyed.

We have to get to the bridge
before he blows it up.

Set up a perimeter at Brooklyn Bridge.

Notify ESU and Bomb Squad.
Let all units know.

Stay off your portables
in Lower Manhattan.

Stay off your portables? Walkie-talkies?

Isn't that how the cops
talk to each other?

Radio waves could set off
a bomb and kill us.

- I'll find Bomb Squad.
- I'll look for Kyle.

I think I know where he may be.

What do we got?

Mobilization points set up
at Chambers and Cadman Plaza.

Okay.

Kyle!

I know you.

Yeah, we... met at the carousel

when you tried to save that man's life.

I know you're not a killer.

I know that wasn't part of your plan.

The carousel was bombed before it opened

to avoid casualties.

The passengers would've lived

if the train hadn't
gotten stuck in that tunnel.

Even killing Fritz
was an accident, wasn't it?

I-I didn't...

I didn't mean to kill anybody.

Th-They were just in the wrong places.

I know.

Tell me about that last day,

what you did with your dad.

- Check the cars down that block.
- It's clear!

Every car so far has been cleared.

It was your birthday.

My dad took off work for my birthday.

I wanted to spend it in New York City,

- do all the things...
- All the things

that any young kid from out of town

would want to do in the big city
on his birthday.

Ride the carousel. Stay in a fancy hotel.

Go on the subway.

No, I wanted to walk across
the Brooklyn Bridge.

He didn't.

It was late.

I threw a tantrum. He took me.

He did everything for me.

He... he was the greatest man I ever met.

But then later he went back there.

He said good night to me at the hotel.

Said he had to go back to the office.

- It's right downstairs.
- Yeah, I know.

I-I could never grow up

to be the man he wanted me to be.

Yeah, he was a great man.

And he wanted you to have a great day.

But at the end of it, he killed himself.

And you know what?

None of that, no matter what
your mind tells you...

none of that was your fault.

- It was.
- I know that you believe

you are destined to become like
your father, but you are not.

You are not like your father,

and you never will be.

Who are you?

My name's Dylan.

Get ready to see something, Dylan.

If you press that button,

it won't be just your memory
that you destroy...

or the bridge.

Hundreds of people...

out for a walk, going to work...

This one's clear, too!

There! That's it!

- Let's go. Over there.
- The horse trailer!

People who love this city,

who love the park.

Fathers and sons.

And you know what?

Some of them might be
spending a birthday together.

Do you really want to kill them?

That is not who you are, Kyle.

I know it's not.

Kyle, no!

Everyone's safe.

The bomb's defused.

- You did well.
- So did you.

Had Kyle pulled that detonator...

I could have saved him.

He's a mass killer.

Losing a parent to suicide
at an early age

can often be a catalyst
for psychiatric disorders.

That is no excuse for what he did.

I know. The worst thing is...

he thought his father's
suicide was his fault,

that he had made his father jump.

He was ill, damaged,

just like his dad.

But he spent his whole life

believing he had failed him,

and he just couldn't move on from that.

Moving on isn't always so easy.

Hasn't been for me.

It wasn't for Kyle,

and look at all the damage it did.

A dad commits suicide
on his son's birthday.

I think the father's the one
who failed the son.

I heard that can happen.

True story.

Oh!

Need some help?

Ah, piece of cake.

Okay...

Okay.

Maybe it can now be
your something borrowed,

except you never have to give it back.

My veil.

What is that, the world's biggest veil?

It's got my dress in there, too.

Promise, if you hate it, you'll tell me.

I'm gonna love it.

You know, I went with you to
ten different bridal shops,

then you change your mind
at the last minute

and buy something on your own?

I was full of surprises... then.

It would have been...

I should have asked you
to help me with my wedding.

And I get why you didn't.

You sure about this?

It's been down there
gathering dust and self-pity.

Time for it and me to move on,

and I'm glad it'll finally
see the light of day.

You and Dylan saved the
day and a lot of lives.

Proud of you.

Thanks, boss.

What? What's wrong?

What?

Um...

- I hate this veil.
- What?

It is the single most
stomach-turning thing

- I've ever seen, and I work in homicide.
- Oh, that...

No, no, no, that is not
my dress or my veil.

Oh, thank God.

The shop must have sent me the wrong one.

I just never realized it,
'cause I never opened the box.

Oh, my God.

I could play Aladdin.

Oh, I love it.

I'm wearing that to your wedding.

Very nice of you to see me off.

I don't get the chance too often,

and I do have my own agenda.

My book came out in paperback this week.

Never mind.

If you're trying to get
me to support your sales,

I'm happy to purchase it, but
I already own the hardcover.

Freaks.

A worthy effort.

What do they say?

"Everyone has one book in them""

I did recognize myself in there.

Something about Mother's cancer

and how a loving person
can still be heartless.

I meant it.

Thank you for calling me a loving person.

The life chose me,

and those who are lucky
to be chosen for this

are meant to abide.

I'm not making that choice.

Don't turn your back on
your gift to spite me.

You've always embraced your true self.

It's who you are whether
you accept it or not.

Dad, it's who I am whether
you accept it or not.

I once said those same words to you,

just in a different context.

You weren't raised
to think it's okay to quit,

to be a failure.

You cannot turn your back
on your responsibility

for a relationship.

I'm proud of who I am.

Yes, I loved my work at the Agency.

It was a fascinating,
thrilling, fulfilling life,

if sometimes immoral,

but when I met Andy,
I realized I knew nothing

about a fulfilling life.

That's been his gift to me.

I got where I am,
I've done what I've done,

because I've learned to sacrifice.

I'm not you.

You're a better case officer
than I ever was.

More clever, more defiant.

If I had your abilities,

I never would have gone
into administration.

You were the case officer
I always wanted to be.

I should go.

Uh, have a safe trip.

♪ She sings the songs

♪ But oh, how it feels so real

♪ Lying here with no one near

♪ Only you

♪ And you can hear me...

How'd it go?

Somehow... not bad.

♪ Slowly

Thank you.

For what?

For being you.

Synced & corrected by -robtor-
www.addic7ed.com access.wgbh.org