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1
00:00:05,047 --> 00:00:07,758
Today, you'd better settle this once and for all...
2
00:00:07,758 --> 00:00:09,635
C'mon, Akiho Kosaka!
3
00:00:11,136 --> 00:00:13,180
Heh, heh, heh...
4
00:00:13,180 --> 00:00:15,933
So. You've come, Haruka Shinozaki.
5
00:00:15,933 --> 00:00:19,937
Allow me to show you my finishing move...
for you to take to the grave!
6
00:00:20,229 --> 00:00:24,858
One taste of this, and your hidden desires
will come to light!
7
00:00:24,858 --> 00:00:27,402
What's this? "Hidden desires"?!
8
00:00:27,402 --> 00:00:29,988
Prepare yourself! For I shall now expose...
9
00:00:29,988 --> 00:00:32,741
MY MOST PRIVATE PARTS!
10
00:00:36,119 --> 00:00:39,164
Hey, there! So, mind if I ASS you a question?
11
00:00:39,164 --> 00:00:43,627
Talking butt cheeks?! This must be
the Aristocracy of the Ass: the Ass-ristocracy!
12
00:00:43,627 --> 00:00:45,379
At long last, I've-!
13
00:00:45,379 --> 00:00:47,130
And THIS is your desire?
14
00:00:47,506 --> 00:00:50,425
"Ass-ristocrazy," you say? How juvenile.
15
00:00:50,425 --> 00:00:52,010
Y-you heard me?!
16
00:00:52,177 --> 00:00:54,137
Still, I'd like to get up in that Ass-ristocrazy...
17
00:00:54,137 --> 00:00:55,264
Then just go already.
18
00:00:56,390 --> 00:00:58,725
Man, this sure is fun! Right, Kana-chan?
19
00:00:58,725 --> 00:01:00,352
In this commentary, we can say whatever we want!
20
00:01:00,352 --> 00:01:03,480
Yup! It's, like, we're totally voice actresses now!
21
00:01:03,480 --> 00:01:06,525
I'm home... Are you two up to something weird again?
22
00:01:06,525 --> 00:01:08,235
Ah! Welcome back, Brother!
23
00:01:08,235 --> 00:01:10,320
There he is, the Ass-ristocracy's biggest fan!
24
00:01:10,320 --> 00:01:11,154
That's just not true!
25
00:01:11,405 --> 00:01:15,284
Okay, Kana-chan! Let's make Haru
and Aki-chan say more weird stuff!
26
00:01:15,284 --> 00:01:16,535
Roger that!
27
00:01:16,535 --> 00:01:17,995
Just don't overdo it, okay?
28
00:01:18,662 --> 00:01:22,916
I want it... I want to be part of that Ass-ristocracy!
I wonder if anyone's willing to go that way...
29
00:01:22,916 --> 00:01:24,418
Fine, I'm just gonna ask!
30
00:01:24,418 --> 00:01:25,669
I want it that badly, do 1?
31
00:01:25,669 --> 00:01:28,046
Um, excuse me... Huh?
32
00:01:29,047 --> 00:01:30,090
What's this paper here?
33
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Some photos of phat, fine asses?!
34
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Don't be ridiculous.
35
00:01:32,551 --> 00:01:34,928
Hey, girl! You dropped something!
36
00:01:34,928 --> 00:01:35,929
Heh, heh, heh...
37
00:01:35,929 --> 00:01:37,681
That is a map of the Ass-ristocracy!
38
00:01:37,681 --> 00:01:39,016
Wait, this story just did a complete 180!
39
00:01:39,016 --> 00:01:41,893
So, hey! You wanna do
some lambada on the way home?
40
00:01:41,893 --> 00:01:43,562
Sounds good. Let's do it!
41
00:01:43,562 --> 00:01:44,855
Isn't the lambada a bit dated?
42
00:01:45,564 --> 00:01:46,732
And... There.
43
00:01:46,732 --> 00:01:48,358
I sure took some great selfies today...
44
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I never do that, okay?
45
00:01:49,651 --> 00:01:54,615
And yet, I still can't solve the mystery
of the Ass-ristocracy map, even after 10 years.
46
00:01:54,615 --> 00:01:55,782
It's been THAT long?!
47
00:01:55,782 --> 00:01:57,034
We meet again!
48
00:01:58,827 --> 00:02:00,579
I have confirmed the extent of your desires...
49
00:02:00,579 --> 00:02:02,414
Your appreciation of the ass is genuine.
50
00:02:03,707 --> 00:02:07,919
I'm sorry for doubting you.
51
00:02:09,421 --> 00:02:11,798
No, you flatter me...
52
00:02:12,424 --> 00:02:15,469
Still, I would do anything
for the sake of dat ass. Trust me!
53
00:02:15,469 --> 00:02:16,762
That's nothing to go around declaring.
54
00:02:17,596 --> 00:02:20,599
Anyway, um... I mean, well...
55
00:02:20,599 --> 00:02:21,725
Basically...
56
00:02:24,102 --> 00:02:25,020
PI...
57
00:02:25,187 --> 00:02:28,565
Please tell me! Where can I find the Ass-ristocracy?!
58
00:02:29,066 --> 00:02:31,401
For me, the ass is essential!
59
00:02:31,401 --> 00:02:32,527
That's just ridiculous.
60
00:02:32,778 --> 00:02:34,988
There's no more need for secrecy...
61
00:02:34,988 --> 00:02:38,408
I will tell you how to get...
how to get to the Ass-ristocracy!
62
00:02:39,409 --> 00:02:41,662
That bastion of booty is...
63
00:02:41,662 --> 00:02:43,789
So near, and yet so far.
64
00:02:43,789 --> 00:02:46,416
And yet, it's so far while being so near.
65
00:02:48,126 --> 00:02:49,670
I don't understand that at all!
66
00:02:49,670 --> 00:02:51,880
It makes no sense, and isn't this
being drawn out a little much?
67
00:02:53,799 --> 00:02:55,342
The Ass-ristocracy...
68
00:02:55,717 --> 00:02:57,969
lies within us all!
69
00:02:58,595 --> 00:03:01,431
It lies... within us all?!
70
00:03:01,932 --> 00:03:03,684
That's a pretty common trope, huh?
71
00:03:04,393 --> 00:03:06,144
So, how do I get there?
72
00:03:06,144 --> 00:03:07,479
Well, it's inside our hearts.
73
00:03:07,479 --> 00:03:09,481
And how do I penetrate those hearts?
74
00:03:09,481 --> 00:03:13,193
Um, well... Oh, I get it! Haruka Shinozaki,
you're an idiot, aren't you?
75
00:03:13,193 --> 00:03:14,861
Yeah, I get that a lot...
76
00:03:14,861 --> 00:03:16,154
That's enough out of you!
77
00:03:18,907 --> 00:03:22,160
That Ass-ristocracy storyline sure was fun!
78
00:03:22,160 --> 00:03:23,120
Right?
79
00:03:23,120 --> 00:03:26,164
It is my greatest masterpiece, my magnum opus!
80
00:03:26,164 --> 00:03:27,082
THAT thing is?!
81
00:03:27,082 --> 00:03:30,669
Kana-chan! We can still keep going
even after the opening sequence is finished!
82
00:03:31,002 --> 00:03:32,379
Haru, you wanna join in?
83
00:03:32,379 --> 00:03:34,297
No thanks. I'm fine just watching.
84
00:03:34,297 --> 00:03:36,883
By the way, Shi-chan... I mean, Big Bro...
85
00:03:36,883 --> 00:03:37,467
Yeah?
86
00:03:37,592 --> 00:03:38,802
In that scene before,
87
00:03:38,802 --> 00:03:43,306
what did you mean by the "48 basic positions"?
88
00:03:43,598 --> 00:03:44,474
Huh?!
89
00:03:44,599 --> 00:03:47,227
Uh, well, that is... Gah!
90
00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:49,146
It's from sumo! They're sumo finishing moves!
91
00:03:49,146 --> 00:03:52,566
I was saying how I'd remember them for Haru!
92
00:03:52,566 --> 00:03:56,236
Huh...? Have you always been a sumo fan, Brother?
93
00:03:56,236 --> 00:03:59,865
Yup, sure have! Sumo's pretty much my only hobby!
94
00:03:59,865 --> 00:04:01,199
"Thanks for the food, lady!"
95
00:04:01,199 --> 00:04:04,661
That's right! Haru likes to watch AND practice sumo!
96
00:04:04,661 --> 00:04:07,080
Flesh pounding against flesh...
sweat flying off of bodies...
97
00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:09,374
his limbs intertwined with mine!
98
00:04:09,374 --> 00:04:11,460
You're going too far again...
99
00:04:11,460 --> 00:04:13,128
I can't help it, can 1?!
100
00:04:13,128 --> 00:04:16,798
Okay! I'll learn these 48 positions as well.
101
00:04:16,965 --> 00:04:19,885
That way, I can wrap my limbs around you, too!
102
00:04:20,594 --> 00:04:22,637
You'd like that, right, Big brother?
103
00:04:26,767 --> 00:04:27,851
This is bad. Right, Haru?
104
00:04:27,851 --> 00:04:29,603
And whose fault is that?!
105
00:04:48,330 --> 00:04:51,374
I'm completely lost... Smartphone to the rescue!
106
00:04:51,541 --> 00:04:53,877
Okay! If I've got a map, then I can make it home!
107
00:04:53,877 --> 00:04:55,212
Waah!
108
00:04:55,212 --> 00:04:57,464
Waah, waah! Waah!
109
00:04:57,464 --> 00:04:59,591
Whoa, whoa, whoa! WHOA! My phone!
110
00:04:59,591 --> 00:05:01,009
And who the heck are you?
111
00:05:01,009 --> 00:05:03,261
Note: A spirit that can take the form of an old man or a crying baby. When picked
up by a passerby it becomes a heavy stone that crushes the victim to death.
I'm Konaki-jiji!
112
00:05:03,261 --> 00:05:05,764
Isn't Konaki-jiji a spirit?
113
00:05:05,764 --> 00:05:08,183
Oh, I've got your spirit...
114
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Get it?
115
00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:13,480
That was corny! WAY too corny! Somebody, help!
116
00:05:13,480 --> 00:05:14,856
Yeah, that was tragically lame.
117
00:05:14,856 --> 00:05:15,732
Ta-daah!
118
00:05:15,732 --> 00:05:16,608
Legs!
119
00:05:16,608 --> 00:05:17,359
More legs!
120
00:05:17,359 --> 00:05:18,235
Boobies!
121
00:05:18,235 --> 00:05:19,528
And, finally, ears!
122
00:05:19,820 --> 00:05:23,240
Cat Girl, the Champion of Justice, has arrived!
123
00:05:23,365 --> 00:05:27,327
My, my. If Konaki and Cat Girl teamed up,
who knows what could happen?
124
00:05:28,078 --> 00:05:31,832
Okay, you know where we're taking you, right?
125
00:05:31,832 --> 00:05:33,375
It's a super famous spot!
126
00:05:33,375 --> 00:05:34,835
Famous, famous!
127
00:05:34,835 --> 00:05:37,587
Here's a hint: It has to do with "Taro."
128
00:05:37,587 --> 00:05:40,173
You mean "GeGeI[xx xx xx]taro?"
129
00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:41,967
No, it's someplace you might want
to take some taro root.
130
00:05:41,967 --> 00:05:43,552
That's a different "taro!"
131
00:05:48,348 --> 00:05:51,101
Just one more hour and the statute of limitations
runs out on my crime, huh?
132
00:05:51,101 --> 00:05:54,229
It's been seven years since I've stolen
some panties... that's a long time.
133
00:05:54,229 --> 00:05:55,564
Hey, I don't do that!
134
00:05:55,564 --> 00:05:57,816
You're Haruka Shinozaki, aren't you?
135
00:05:57,816 --> 00:06:00,110
Who are you?! I'm busy right now...
136
00:06:00,944 --> 00:06:04,281
The name's Kosaka.
I'm a detective for the prefectural police.
137
00:06:04,489 --> 00:06:07,534
A detective?! Wh-wh-what do you want?
138
00:06:07,742 --> 00:06:10,704
I haven't stolen any panties! Nope, not at all!
139
00:06:10,704 --> 00:06:12,289
That was totally a confession just now...
140
00:06:12,289 --> 00:06:15,417
I have evidence. This pen was found
at the scene of the crime.
141
00:06:15,417 --> 00:06:18,211
That's my pen! I thought I'd lost it.
142
00:06:18,503 --> 00:06:20,964
I knew it. Seven years ago...
143
00:06:20,964 --> 00:06:22,716
my panties were stolen.
144
00:06:22,716 --> 00:06:25,594
That's why I became a detective, to catch the culprit.
145
00:06:25,594 --> 00:06:28,972
Put simply, since that day, I have worn no panties!
146
00:06:28,972 --> 00:06:30,432
This setup is just absurd.
147
00:06:31,474 --> 00:06:35,437
Uh, I made a mistake.
It turns out that pen isn't mine after-
148
00:06:35,437 --> 00:06:38,523
No more games, Shinozaki!
Slip out of those panties right now!
149
00:06:38,523 --> 00:06:41,818
You've been wearing them
for the past seven years, haven't you? Well?!
150
00:06:41,818 --> 00:06:43,862
I'm sorry! I'll take them off right away!
151
00:06:43,862 --> 00:06:45,196
A panty thief, huh?
152
00:06:45,196 --> 00:06:46,281
How heinous!
153
00:06:46,489 --> 00:06:50,160
S-still! Can I wear them a little longer,
until my case is dismissed?
154
00:06:50,160 --> 00:06:52,746
They just feel so nice...
155
00:06:52,746 --> 00:06:53,288
Huh?
156
00:06:53,288 --> 00:06:54,247
Well, fine.
157
00:06:54,831 --> 00:06:56,833
Starting tomorrow, my days will be panty-free, eh?
158
00:06:56,833 --> 00:06:58,376
And I was so close to getting away with it...
159
00:07:00,587 --> 00:07:03,423
Well, that finishes up the prep work
for the smuggled contraband...
160
00:07:03,423 --> 00:07:06,843
Hey, Kosaka. Take this to the harbor warehouse.
161
00:07:06,843 --> 00:07:08,219
Yes, Boss.
162
00:07:08,219 --> 00:07:09,512
I'm counting on you.
163
00:07:09,846 --> 00:07:10,931
Hup!
164
00:07:11,222 --> 00:07:13,141
Hey, there, Bro! She sure relies on you, huh?
165
00:07:13,141 --> 00:07:14,976
She just seems like a grunt, if you ask me...
166
00:07:14,976 --> 00:07:16,186
Allow me to help!
167
00:07:16,186 --> 00:07:18,355
No. You need not concern yourself with this chore.
168
00:07:18,355 --> 00:07:19,522
WHAAAAAT?!
169
00:07:19,522 --> 00:07:21,858
No way! Come on, please let me!
170
00:07:22,192 --> 00:07:25,320
Well, when you put it like that,
it would be wrong of me to say no...
171
00:07:26,571 --> 00:07:27,364
Okay.
172
00:07:27,739 --> 00:07:30,158
You may help meeeee!
173
00:07:30,158 --> 00:07:31,493
Here. Take this.
174
00:07:31,618 --> 00:07:34,496
Bro, your face doesn't match what you're saying!
175
00:07:34,496 --> 00:07:36,206
Well, that's part of the game, isn't it?
176
00:07:36,206 --> 00:07:39,250
I'm sorry, Shinozaki. This is putting you in harm's way...
177
00:07:39,250 --> 00:07:41,670
No problem! I'd do anything for you, Bro!
178
00:07:41,670 --> 00:07:44,923
Still, I wonder what this contraband could be...
179
00:07:47,968 --> 00:07:50,553
I bet they're a Dragon Quest Ill Tamagotchi.
180
00:07:50,553 --> 00:07:53,014
I mean, they're trendy and sold out everywhere.
181
00:07:53,014 --> 00:07:56,601
Bro, your knowledge of what's "trendy"
is 20 or 30 years old...
182
00:08:00,605 --> 00:08:02,774
Well, that settles that, Bro!
183
00:08:02,774 --> 00:08:06,027
Yeah. But once again, I've made you
an accomplice to a crime...
184
00:08:06,027 --> 00:08:09,531
Also, when I do something bad,
my lower back goes crooked like this.
185
00:08:09,531 --> 00:08:10,657
What kind of story is this?!
186
00:08:10,657 --> 00:08:12,200
Say, Shinozaki...
187
00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:15,996
You think you could fix my back...
with that special chant of yours?
188
00:08:16,579 --> 00:08:18,623
Right! Backsy-wacksy, upsy-daisy!
189
00:08:18,623 --> 00:08:19,708
That was easy!
190
00:08:20,041 --> 00:08:21,793
You've been a big help, Shinozaki.
191
00:08:22,502 --> 00:08:24,671
You sure are cool, Bro!
192
00:08:24,671 --> 00:08:26,965
But... Now I've got a cramp in my leg.
193
00:08:26,965 --> 00:08:28,717
So it comes with a side-effect, huh?
194
00:08:28,925 --> 00:08:33,596
Incredible. With these headphones...
I can hear things.
195
00:08:33,596 --> 00:08:35,223
What's so impressive about that?
196
00:08:35,223 --> 00:08:37,392
Hey, you're that newbie singer Akiho-kun, right?
197
00:08:37,392 --> 00:08:40,854
I'm popular and super in-demand
music producer Haruka Shinozaki.
198
00:08:40,854 --> 00:08:44,315
Good morning, Popular and Super
In-demand... uh, whatever.
199
00:08:44,441 --> 00:08:47,527
I was just doing some solo practice to prep for my debut.
200
00:08:47,527 --> 00:08:49,696
Oh? What were you listening to?
201
00:08:49,821 --> 00:08:50,655
Here.
202
00:08:50,655 --> 00:08:53,158
It's "Suzufuri" by Shinshou.
203
00:08:53,158 --> 00:08:55,702
Rakugo? You're not a singer?!
204
00:08:59,247 --> 00:09:01,624
So, do you like this hotel?
205
00:09:01,916 --> 00:09:04,461
Yes. The night view is very beautiful.
206
00:09:04,461 --> 00:09:06,504
It just looks like a plain old roof though...
207
00:09:06,504 --> 00:09:09,382
Say, Akiho-kun, you can spare a little of that, can't you!
208
00:09:09,382 --> 00:09:11,843
I-1 can't, Popular and Super In-demand, um...
209
00:09:11,843 --> 00:09:14,304
I'm sorry. I shouldn't have tried to take some.
210
00:09:14,304 --> 00:09:15,180
It's just...
211
00:09:15,180 --> 00:09:18,558
This fruit assortment is a sample for my side business.
212
00:09:18,558 --> 00:09:19,642
If you really want it, I can sell it to you.
213
00:09:19,642 --> 00:09:21,311
So this was all about fruit?!
214
00:09:21,311 --> 00:09:24,439
Akiho-kun, I'm sure your family is suited
for the entertainment world as well.
215
00:09:24,439 --> 00:09:27,317
Do you have any siblings interested
in breaking into the business?
216
00:09:27,317 --> 00:09:28,860
If so, you should introduce them to me!
217
00:09:28,860 --> 00:09:32,530
Actually, I have a grandmother in her 60s
who's quite interested in this...
218
00:09:32,822 --> 00:09:37,494
Your grandmother?! A grandma is a little, uh...
Is there anyone else?
219
00:09:37,994 --> 00:09:41,372
I see. Well, then... How about this person?
220
00:09:42,040 --> 00:09:43,708
There. I sent you a pic.
221
00:09:43,708 --> 00:09:45,168
Let's have a look...
222
00:09:45,168 --> 00:09:46,002
Huh?!
223
00:09:46,002 --> 00:09:48,254
That's my 85-year old great-grandfather.
224
00:09:48,463 --> 00:09:50,173
His hobby is playing with condensed milk.
225
00:09:50,173 --> 00:09:51,508
That's one weird hobby!
226
00:09:51,508 --> 00:09:53,676
You're choosing the wrong thing to heckle!
227
00:09:53,676 --> 00:09:56,054
I am a door-to-door salesman.
228
00:09:56,221 --> 00:09:57,889
Now to find some customers... WHAT?!
229
00:09:58,181 --> 00:10:00,266
At this rate, my company will go bankrupt!
230
00:10:00,266 --> 00:10:02,602
Is there nothing we can do?!
231
00:10:02,602 --> 00:10:05,105
Yup! Let's just give up, Boss!
232
00:10:05,814 --> 00:10:08,525
It's times like these
that you should buy a good-luck vase!
233
00:10:08,525 --> 00:10:12,612
Act now, and it can be yours for just 120 million yen!
234
00:10:14,781 --> 00:10:16,616
There's no way I'd have that kind of money!
235
00:10:16,616 --> 00:10:19,494
Well, you can pay in 6,000 easy installments...
236
00:10:19,494 --> 00:10:21,496
Just leave already!
237
00:10:22,664 --> 00:10:24,249
Another missed sale...
238
00:10:25,375 --> 00:10:26,209
What should I do?
239
00:10:26,209 --> 00:10:29,003
Looks like Kosaka couldn't land a contract today, either.
240
00:10:29,003 --> 00:10:30,672
She's just no good at the hard sell.
241
00:10:30,672 --> 00:10:33,508
She should just get them to sign
without saying how much the jar costs.
242
00:10:33,508 --> 00:10:35,176
Yeah, that's a problem all right.
243
00:10:35,927 --> 00:10:38,138
I wonder if there are any easy targets around here.
244
00:10:38,429 --> 00:10:42,600
Someone who'd fork over their cash
with a little womanly charm...
245
00:10:43,101 --> 00:10:43,893
Yes!
246
00:10:43,893 --> 00:10:46,688
Wait, what is this? Could this person be...?
247
00:10:47,689 --> 00:10:48,606
But...
248
00:10:51,151 --> 00:10:53,736
If something's bothering you,
feel free to tell me all about it.
249
00:10:53,736 --> 00:10:55,238
This is gonna work!
250
00:10:55,238 --> 00:10:59,159
U-um... Well...
251
00:11:00,118 --> 00:11:01,244
Please...
252
00:11:01,244 --> 00:11:02,745
buy a vase.
253
00:11:04,247 --> 00:11:06,541
A vase? Um, well, okay.
254
00:11:06,541 --> 00:11:08,877
You can pay in 6,000 installments. Thanks.
255
00:11:08,877 --> 00:11:10,295
That was way too easy.
256
00:11:11,087 --> 00:11:11,546
Episode 1
257
00:11:16,551 --> 00:11:20,096
It sure was fun doing random voiceovers!
258
00:11:20,096 --> 00:11:21,598
We really got into it, huh?
259
00:11:21,598 --> 00:11:23,349
Wait, what about the second half of the episode?
260
00:11:23,349 --> 00:11:24,851
Yeah, well, we got kinda bored.
261
00:11:24,851 --> 00:11:27,645
Hey, Kana-chan, wanna go get some ice cream?
262
00:11:27,645 --> 00:11:28,813
Count me in!
263
00:11:28,813 --> 00:11:32,025
My friend works part time at a parlor, so let's go see her!
264
00:11:33,318 --> 00:11:36,487
You can come too if you want, Big Bro!
265
00:11:37,405 --> 00:11:39,532
Well, maybe I'll invite a friend...
266
00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:40,575
Hooray!
267
00:11:40,575 --> 00:11:42,619
Score! Haru, you're gonna pay, right?
268
00:11:42,619 --> 00:11:44,787
Huh?! Why the heck should 1?
269
00:11:44,787 --> 00:11:46,789
You just have to. Right?
270
00:11:46,789 --> 00:11:48,458
You. Just. Have. To!
271
00:11:48,958 --> 00:11:53,171
Kanata is a given, but why you too, Sis? Jeez...
272
00:11:53,171 --> 00:11:55,089
Kana's gotten hungry all of a sudden!
273
00:11:55,089 --> 00:11:56,341
Let's go eat!
274
00:11:58,676 --> 00:12:01,554
The End
275
00:12:02,805 --> 00:12:07,060
Cast
Haruka Shinozaki: Mitsuhiro Ichiki
Shizuku Ariyama: Larissa Tago Takeda
Kanata Shinozaki: Yuki Yagi
21021
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