Original subtitles

Here we are, in the beautiful Pacific Northwest.

In a house, not just your typical house.

This is a home where evil lives.

And me and my crew are going to bring you, the viewer, along to experience the

terror. I got a real icky feeling again, Drex. I'm feeling my balls, bro.

I bet you can't assemble.

This is the Weaver residence.

It was said that old man Weaver would talk to ghosts.

But... No one ever asked who the ghosts were.

After he died throughout the clutter, they found the remains of three women.

Count them.

Three.

And tonight, we're going to seek out these women.

Three women?

Bro, that's so fucked up. Three women ghosts could be this house?

Yeah, very much so.

I believe three women whose souls are yearning to be heard

are in this very house.

I think we're also going to find Old Man Weaver himself.

Let's go.

Holy shit, Drex.

This EMF is going crazy.

I'm getting that all -too -familiar feeling down the back of my spine.

Something bad's in this room right now.

Something sinister.

Yeah. I think we need some answers from this evil spirit.

What's up with your thoughts?

Are you angry that we're in your house?

Are you angry that we came to set the girls free?

Did you hear that?

Sure did.

Dead. Dead. Yes.

You are dead.

You can go.

You're free. You do not have to stay in these evil walls any longer.

Oh my god.

Oh my god.

Do you guys fucking hear that?

Play it.

Play it back. This is gonna blow your fucking mind, bro.

Wow. I can't believe we talked back. What?

I can't hear it.

Maybe my senses are being affected by the energy in the room.

The spirit said, I killed the turtle. You know what? The blood is a

That's great.

Coxman, you stay here. I think you have old man Weaver in the room.

Sambo, we're going to the garage.

Oh, yeah, we are.

Mr. Weaver, how many girls did you kill?

Ladies and gentlemen, what I'm about to reveal might shock you.

We did our research on Old Man Weaver. He led a simple life in these mountains.

He was a logger, chopped trees, milled them, did business with almost everybody

in town.

Old Man Weaver had a secret.

He had the remains of three women.

The bones.

In this very house.

Tonight, we're going to contact them. We're going to help them. We're going to

set them free.

Amen, brother.

Okay.

Yeah, we're definitely going.

Hell yeah, we are. Let's get down there.

for the girls, Weaver.

Come on now.

Weaver, don't you think you're being a little selfish?

Holding back these three ancient girls?

Come on.

Nothing but music, bro.

Doing what?

Nothing.

I'm done waiting.

Let's get a little crazy here.

You feel like a chill, bro?

It's freezing.

It's fucking freezing in here.

Tell me one of your names.

Old Man Weaver's in the room.

He's still trying to hide his girls.

Quit hiding.

Are you a murderer?

Let them free, Weaver!

Fuck. What am I even saying?

We have never seen this before. This Mr. Weaver is one powerful spirit.

I'm like, afraid right now. Like, truly afraid.

Yeah. Dude, we can't be afraid.

We might be in danger. But look, we've never been this close to having

Oh!

Fuck, it's something disgusting dude. Watch your back.

Whoa, bro, you have scratches on your neck.

Weaver, are you in here?

Let the girls go.

We're not finished yet, Weaver.

We're not going anywhere.

Drake, let's get back upstairs. This is getting a little out of hand.

Let's go.

I think we have all the evidence that we came for.

This house was definitely experiencing paranormal activity.

I think we made an impact on the experience that are here.

We captured it on camera.

We showed you the truth.

Another successful investigation.

We fight the evil spirits for you and for those lost.

Trap Souls.

Our one mission is to show you, the viewer, what lies beyond

the shadows.

See you next week.

Go back to my side.

Hey,

hey.

Looking a little insecure, huh?

Can we edit that?

You know, because my reputation is...

badass, slash smoldering gentleman, slash intellectual.

You know?

I don't want to disappoint my fans.

It's not a thing.

It's not a thing.

So, tell me what it is.

How you feeling Bri?

Right now?

Here. By messing with the color, I can give the audience the impression of a

more intense white flipping.

And by adjusting the audio, I can really bring it home to the beer bottle.

People are going to eat this up like jelly in an ass crack.

I'm good. I'm just a little tired.

How are the kids?

Right on.

I know. I miss you too.

Yeah. Shouldn't be too much longer.

We were going to go out to Port Townsend for a little hotel haunting, but I

ended up finding a little gem tonight.

Not just some lodge up in the mountains.

Yeah. I got a good feeling about it.

Yep.

Two to four more days, probably.

And you know what time it is.

The keyhole, baby.

You and me.

Sandy beaches.

Kioskos.

Yeah.

I miss you.

Okay. Well, you get some sleep tonight, okay?

Get the kids going.

How fucking much?

This is free advertising you're getting here.

This is a premium cable television program.

After this airs, people will be flocking to your prestigious establishment, sir.

That I can assure you.

Look sharp, Sammy.

Fuck, Drax. You didn't say we were filming this early.

You said we had the morning off.

I was in the middle of my reoccurring ghost sex dream and you woke me up with

goddamn wet willy. I mean...

Sure, I'm a 30 -year -old man living out of a van in a motel filming as

glorified of a Fabio of the Paranormal Best Friends.

But fuck, man, it was a good dream.

Okay, I'm sorry about that.

Action.

Hello, ladies and gentlemen. Hello to our loyal fans and followers. Hello to

world, to the believers.

My mom.

Hey, Mom.

Also, hello to the people that think we're crazy, the haters. We need you,

Boy, do we have a big announcement.

Next week, we're inviting some new faces onto our show, including the best

paranormal debunker west of Reno, Dr.

Calvin Hardin.

He'll be coming along, just trying, just trying to disprove our ability to

connect with the paranormal.

We're also inviting three super fans, three viewers, just like you, along to

only follow us with flashlights, but to be part of the team.

And finally, we've invited the finest medium of maybe the galaxy, Ms.

Fantasma Specter. She'll be joining us to incite the spirits.

Everyone will be involved from preparation to the final moments of

Now we're going to a haunted lodge that sits atop the Chetco River Massacre of

1853 along the southern Oregon coast where 26 men and...

Countless women and children were slaughtered in the night by ruthless

murderers.

This is going to be epic.

We're going in and beyond death.

Amen.

I mean, you think this is a good idea, Drex? I mean, Dr. Harding's been trying

to shut us down since we first aired.

Yeah. Live show?

Yeah, bro.

I love the enthusiasm, but with another crew trying to prove that we're faking

and maybe you forgot, but we are definitely faking, this could be fucking

disastrous. You know, even though the show is fake, I feel like you guys are

making a real impact on Spirit.

And on me.

I've never felt so alive and so at home than right now.

I'm at the peak of my spirituality.

What do you think, Brian?

What do I think?

About the ridiculous bonfire of a show we're driving to film right now?

Or about doing any show with Native American spheres?

You know how I feel about that.

Or just what do I think about life in general?

Tell them how you feel about our voyage of doom.

to the lodge to meet Dr. Harding and his legion of scientific assholes.

Okay, Samuel. Happy to oblige.

Dr. Harding is obsessed with bringing you down, Dresk.

Dr. Harding has a stick up his ass that you, we, the show has become famous.

Panda and visual effects and bad lighting to the masses for monetary

And with this being a live show, by the way, bravo to you for adding that.

We have zero room for error or rehearsal or setup.

We'll be fine.

We'll be fine.

All right? We're going to go in there. We're just going to wing it.

We'll focus on our connection to the spirits. We might have to interact with

them. No gadgets, no visuals, no tricks.

Just a fucking connection.

We'll preload a couple sounds onto the spirit box.

We'll act our asses off. You throw in a couple superfans and a medium.

Your confidence is fucking inspiring.

I'm interested to hear about why you don't like investigating Native American

spirits. I love Native Americans.

They're vigorous.

I love to.

Every time we do a show and there's even a sliver of Native American spirits, I

nearly shit my pants.

Like... I think I actually shit my pants last time.

Those native spirits are nothing amiss in the real life or the afterlife, Greg.

What do you mean you think you shit your pants?

Samuel, I'd appreciate it if you didn't bring up my fecal matters in front of

the lady.

I'm not going around telling everyone about the time you clogged the community

center toilet in that small town in Kansas.

It was the fucking Chili's, bro.

Oh, yeah?

That was great.

You got on top of the toilet. You're like, does anyone have a plunger?

It was the Midwestern fucking chili. You know what? Fuck you guys.

So, what do you think about life in general?

I'm scared at this moment.

But I'm happy to be doing a television show with my friends.

Amen. Fucking amen, brother.

On a darker note, did you know that the Native American genocide in our country

alone is absolutely atrocious?

There were an estimated 10 million Native Americans on this land that we

the United States when European settlers first came in the 15th century.

By the year 1900, the population had fallen to around 300 ,000.

Our government, our military,

Even the Mormons were killing them, slaughtering them.

The Sand Creek Massacre in the Colorado Territory in 1864.

Colonel John Covington took a 700 volunteer militia to kill between 100

elders, women, and children while the men were away hunting.

Colonel Covington was never charged.

The Marias Massacre in Montana in 1870.

Colonel Eugene Baker surrounded a village.

One of his men told Colonel Baker it was the wrong tribe they were about to

attack.

Colonel Baker attacked anyway.

Again, the men were away hunting.

173 elders, women, and children were killed.

They crushed the skulls with axes to anyone wounded.

They set fire to lodges.

Wounded knee.

Trail of tears.

All we gave them.

was free healthcare.

How we doing? Anything on my teeth?

All right, we're about to go fucking live.

Go ahead.

Action, bro.

Ladies and gentlemen of the world, my name is Drexler Faust, host of Beyond

Shadows, and we're here live at the Chetco River Lodge, a place where

accounts of paranormal activity have been reported.

The rooms are haunted. The surrounding forest is haunted. The very driveway

we stand on right now is haunted.

haunted by the Chetco villagers of 1853, where they lived peacefully until two

men, Miller and Nash, came in the night and slaughtered an entire village

despite a peace treaty.

We're here tonight to honor those people, those lost souls, those brave

warriors. Let's start at the lodge.

Drexel Faust, host of Beyond the Shadows. I know, I'm a big fan.

Oh, you watch the show? No, but welcome anyways.

Welcome, sirs. It is my pleasure to welcome you to the Chetco River Lodge.

have several luxurious rooms with full -size beds.

We even have massage capabilities, a spa of sorts, and facials.

Facials, okay. Well, thank you so much for the hospitality.

We're so excited to be here. Allow me to introduce...

My cameraman, my co -host, snake charmer, this is Sam.

You charmed a snake.

Sweet,

man. Sweet spot.

Can you tell me more about the massage and facial packages?

Oh, it's my pleasure to tell you that your masseur is none other than... And

right over here, we have our other co -host, Jonathan Coxman.

Sir.

Your wives.

are very beautiful.

Oh, no, no. Those aren't our wives.

Right. Well, nevertheless, they are sweet Christmas. Horses and jalapeno.

Yes. Hello, wives.

And right here, we have my right -hand man, Brian.

Yes.

Well, welcome.

Yes. Follow me, if you will.

Yes, please.

Would you mind telling us about the spirits of the house?

Jesus Christ.

Get on with yourself.

Pardon me.

There are a number of disturbances here in the lodge and also in the surrounding

property. When you say disturbances, what kind of disturbances are you?

Oh, you mean it. Pretty mild, really, you know.

Voices, thrown objects, footstep.

The occasional spontaneous fire.

Whoa.

Spontaneous fires.

Monty, that's not very mild. That sounds quite frightening and serious.

Harold. I don't think so.

I've been living amongst the spirits for years, and I find it all quite...

You're fucking crazy, bro.

I am fucking crazy, bro.

Marty, would you mind telling us what areas of the lodge are haunted? What

exactly?

Sir.

It's all haunted.

But there are certain rooms frequented more often by certain spirits. For

instance, the spirits of Miller and Nash seem to...

Most frequent room one up there. I also feel they're present down by the river

in the garden.

What makes you so sure it's Miller and Nash?

Who else could it be?

Ah, Miller and Nash, the cowardly murderers themselves.

I think I'll start my investigation in room one.

Oh!

You get that?

Room three often contains the women's spirits.

And if you know women, like I do... Little dumpling.

Well,

obviously,

I'll be investigating a woman's room.

I don't know, maybe we give the women's room to spammy this time.

No offense, but they're kind of a little... A little bit of... A little

Creepy, bro.

You get creepy around women's spirits.

With women in general.

And look, women love me.

Women love the cocksman.

Anyhoo, those stairs right there to my right lead down to the basement in the

cellar, which is often occupied by the children's spirits. They're always

running around down that little rattle.

Boom. Cocksman, you take the basement.

Come on, dude.

Fucking hate kid ghosts.

Always kid ghosts.

Bye -bye.

What's wrong?

Do you see something?

The majority of the maining disturbances happened outside.

What about the fire?

I beg your pardon.

I seem to have messed myself.

Well, Monty, you go take care of that.

In the meantime, I think I've heard our first guest arrive.

Let's go introduce ourselves.

Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to introduce leading paranormal debunker

Reno, Calvin Harding. Welcome to Chekhov River Lodge.

I will not shake your hand, Mr. Faust.

I have seen every video you've posted online about me being a so -called point

dexter, saying that my methods and practices are medieval, outdated.

It's called science, Mr. Faust, and science is indisputable.

And will you stop bringing up Reno?

Please?

Okay.

I'm sorry, Mr. Faust, but don't try and be cordial with me.

You see, this man here is brilliant on a level you couldn't possibly comprehend.

While you and your boyfriends are playing make -believe in the forest, we

research. We find proof.

Dr. Harding has spent his life's work disproving hustlers like you and this

floppy excuse of a crew.

So you'll have to forgive me, but no, I won't wish you good luck.

Okay.

Okay, yeah, fair enough. However, the hostility only goes one way. I'm a big

of your work, both of you, really.

You see, we need debunkers selfless like you guys.

To expose the frauds.

Really, Dr. Bright, Dr. Harding, incredible work you do out there.

Fortunately for you, we have an incredibly real live show that... I

to shake your hand, direct. I'm a big fan. Love the show. I stumbled upon it

when you guys were investigating those ghost hookers outside Dayton, Nevada.

I'll watch anything about hookers.

Or ghosts.

I was instantly hooked. I never miss a show. I record them all. You're truly an

inspiration.

Love to hear that. Dayton was a good show.

Love Dayton.

And I love ghost hookers.

Yes, you do.

Who doesn't?

Perfect. Monty, would you mind giving our new friends a tour?

Don't call me your friend, Mr. Faust.

I have, you know.

I don't have time for friends.

I am deeply committed to my work.

Deeply. And I've been dreaming of getting you all alone in a dark, scary

just like this one for a very long time.

Imbecile.

I really hope you've been saving your ducats, Mr. Faust. Because make -believe

time is over.

Okay.

What's a ducat?

I'll tell you later.

Clearly. We're in for one hell of a night.

T!

Have a chat, boys.

Alright.

We need to be more careful with these guests tonight, okay? None of the

lingo.

Because we can't edit. We can't reshoot. We can't skip past the parts where Dr.

Harding finds evidence that our show is complete horseshit.

Brian. Look, we just need to lead the investigation.

If we lead the investigation, we have control.

I need you to be two steps ahead of us the entire night, okay?

One misstep, one mistake, the show's over.

We got it?

All right.

Coxman, I need you to be top notch tonight, all right, bud? I need you to

over the room.

I got an idea on how we can regain the advantage over these ghost narcs.

But I need you to be quick on your feet. Roll with the punches, all right?

Fucking adapt.

Okay? Take off your shades.

It's been me and you since day one, okay?

More reckless, more extreme than any other crew.

We go deeper. We go darker. You know what we do.

Get in there. Get in there.

That's right.

Look, if we pull this off without being exposed, we claim our spot.

In the Ghost Hunting Hall of Fame, alright? Mount fucking Rushmore.

You got it? I love you. Love you too, dude.

Fuck yeah.

You follow?

I follow.

Alright. Hey.

I'm banging one of these groupies, though.

Right. Right.

Give me a good night.

You know, all bad things.

Well, well. Sammy!

Sammy, let's go!

Hello!

Welcome to Beyond the Shadows. I'm Drexler Faust.

I know who you are, Drek. I'm a big fan.

Yeah.

I'm so excited to have you here.

I almost found you in Deadwood.

I knew what hotel you were staying at, what floor you were on.

But I couldn't find your room number.

Okay. I guess it just wasn't meant to be that night.

Yeah. But here I am, and here you are.

Look at that.

There I am.

Well, hey, let me introduce you to my incredibly talented and single

Sammy. I'm Sammy.

Hi, Ashley Burrows from Cedar City.

Utah? Oh, shit, really?

Mm -hmm.

Utah girls are crazy.

Hey, welcome.

Damn,

Drexler 5.

Beyond the fucking shadows. The big stick.

Oh, the pipes.

Hey, yeah.

Welcome to the show. You know, the fans are the real reason we do these shows.

Oh, I know.

I'm the exact same way.

Back in Wyoming, I'm a bit of an entertainer myself.

Showman, won't you go ahead and tell the people who you are, what you do?

Name's Rooster.

Rooster Jennings. Part -time tree trimmer, part -time amateur taxidermist.

have people coming by the garage all the time to see what I'm skinning.

Skinning? Drexler.

Can't stuff an animal until you skin it.

In fact, just three days ago, I had quite the audience.

I found myself a badger on the side of the road just outside Glen Rock.

I saw that beauty.

I had to have her. So I scooped her up. A couple weeks later, I get to skinning.

When I get to skinning, people got to watch.

You get it? Yeah. But the stink of that badger was a little unsettling, Drexler.

Bitter.

But I'm skinning that damn badger has to be done.

The fucking Levi.

Levi may or may not have been high on some of that meth.

I'm not one to judge.

Levi is nodding off, just as useless as an ass on a blind sheep.

But the smell gets him gagging.

Oh, stay with me, boy. You won't regret.

Yeah. Then... Old Jericho shows up with some of them bath salts.

Obviously, I'm working, so the salts will have to wait.

Jericho starts dry heaving from the smell.

I don't care what the big ado is all about, so I keep on skinning.

Then, I don't know if it was the tiny bit of meth I smoked or the lack of

circulation in the garage, but the stank gets me coughing.

Just an awful stank.

Everyone is coughing and gagging.

Drexler, I don't know what the hell I was thinking trying to skin that badger

boy. Oh,

away

with words you have, rooster. Yep.

Who's this fine gentleman?

Apologies. I'm Lou.

Lou. All right, Drexler Faust. I saw a ghost about six years ago.

I think that's the main reason I started smoking pot again.

Well, that and losing my goldfish.

Yeah, it's been rough, but I am maintaining, Mr. Faust.

Goddamn, I've been waiting to see a ghost for six years.

Yeah. Well, we're excited to have you on the show, Lou. Thank you. Tell us more

about this ghost yourself.

Well... Don't know the scientific term, but, I mean, correct me if I'm wrong, it

was an erotic encounter.

Erotic? Yeah.

Well, it was this elderly woman eating a giant deli meat

sandwich.

I know what you're thinking. Yes, I was high. Yes, I was starving. And sometimes

when I'm hungry, I want to...

Giant deli meat sandwich, but it wasn't the pot, Mr. Drexler.

Clearing that up for us, Lou?

No problem.

So anyway, this elderly woman is kind of grotesque at first, but I'm just

sitting in the dark watching her slowly eat this giant

deli meat sandwich very seductively, very suggestively.

It changed me.

Yeah.

Now I only date women over 65.

Powerful. Very powerful story there, Lou.

Where'd you say you're from?

Pahrump.

Brought to town, Nevada.

Big fan. Yeah.

Lou from Pahrump.

Mm -hmm.

All right. Well, we're excited to have you on the show. We're in for one hell

an adventure.

So, uh, is this where we're sleeping?

All right. Yeah, this is the spot. However, we won't be doing much

The night is for the investigation.

Well, let's go find some ghosts then.

What he said.

All right. We are just about ready to start this investigation.

We're still waiting on our medium, but I think we're all just a little bit too

excited here. We've got to get this thing going.

It's my pleasure to introduce to you our guests for the evening.

Let's start over here.

Dr.

Calvin Harding, Dr.

Bright, and of course, their cameraman, Keith Harding.

And despite the conflicts over the years that Dr. Harding and I have had, I

still very much respect his work.

I'm fascinated by everything you do.

And I must admit, you're wearing the hell out of that powder blue suit.

And of course, the real reason we do the show, our fans.

We've got Ashley, we've got Rooster, we've got Lou here along. And they're

just going to be, you know, dragging along throughout the show. They're going

be full participants in this investigation.

So excited to have you guys here. And how could we do the show without the

and the care from our viewers?

Thank you to you guys.

Now, along with my crew is my Swiss Army man of a producer, Brian.

We've got Jonathan Coxman.

Love the guy. And behind the camera, Sammy.

Excited for the evening, you guys.

Honestly. Thanks for being here.

Barring words, Mr. Faust. I am, I tell you, you smell of victory. You

taste the sweat of conquest. I have an erection. Oh, wow.

Ladies and gentlemen, while I am the host of the show, we have the host of

house, Monty. Monty has been so incredibly helpful in preparing for this

investigation. Monty, why don't you go ahead and say hello to our millions of

viewers across the world.

What do we have here?

I

was

wondering when you were going to make your appearance.

Ladies and gentlemen, our final guest.

Perhaps the finest medium in the world.

Phantasm Effector.

Stop. Bro, she knows your name.

That doesn't prove anything.

She probably watches the show, right?

I don't watch television of any kind.

Whoa, really?

It's like a program on TV right now.

Jonathan, I can feel the pressure squeezing.

Tightening what's on your skin.

I can feel what you're feeling.

I don't feel pressure, baby.

I don't get scared.

I run towards the fear.

I feel trapped.

You are suffocating.

We'll, uh, we'll chat more after the show.

All right, guys.

We're very excited to kick this thing off.

Why don't you go ahead and square up?

Do I, um, get to stay with you?

Dreckfoot, I think you and I should head off back towards the bedroom.

To investigate.

Just to investigate.

Of course. And I'll have you know one thing, Mr. Faust.

I will not be ushered around like some toddler in a haunted house.

I will not scare.

I will not see the supposed ghost that you see. I will not hear the voices amid

the white noise.

I will not be led into some stage terror hoping to invoke a girlish shriek.

My team and I will not be led into a corner while you set up your tricks.

Of course.

That's exactly what I was thinking. You and I are on the same page, Cal.

And that is why we're going to go ahead and split up into groups of three.

We're not going to separate. We're just going to mix it out.

Yeah? Hmm.

Sound good.

I'll take your cameraman.

Sammy.

Perfect. Suppose I'll take your cameraman.

Keith. Yes.

Oh, my fucking God.

I am living my dream right now.

Well, our third group is going to need a camera.

Coxman, why don't you go ahead and take a camera?

Okay. Who do you pick?

Okay.

And I choose Miss Bright.

Okay, yes.

Technically, I am a miss, but...

My heart is already taken. So, no cutesy ideas.

Got it, frat boy?

Woo -hoo!

She's feisty.

I like feisty.

Cal, since you're the most skeptical of the group, why don't you go ahead and

take first pick on the fans?

I'll take the stoner.

I'll take Ashley.

Fuck. Fuck.

All right, gang.

So there's four different areas of the house that have major disturbances.

We have rooms one, two, three, and the outside area.

I'll go ahead and take room three, the room with the women ghosts.

Cotswain, why don't you go ahead and take the room with the children ghosts.

Cal, how about you go ahead and take room one?

with the alleged ghosts of Miller and Nash.

I'm not falling for any of this tomfoolery. I know you have all sorts of

elaborate special effects planned for room three.

I'll take room three.

You take Nash and Miller.

Fine. Sure.

Go about your way.

I've got to prep my team.

Come on, Keith. Luke.

All right.

Welcome to Monolith.

I really like that they get to interact with these Native American spirits.

I've had nothing but life -changing experiences with Native Americans.

Hey, Monty? Oh, it has to be so fun to deal with these spirits every night.

I mean, what the fuck?

Is everyone else doing with their lives?

What is the benchmark of American society?

Getting into Harvard?

Building a retirement fund?

Fuck that.

Dumpling, fuck that.

Fuck that.

I truly embrace the journey.

And mine has taken me here.

Yours, Monty, has kept you here.

Holly's has brought us together.

When anyone alternate choice at any crucial moment in our lives,

maybe this night never happens.

Oh, it's crazy to think.

One different choice.

We might not be here.

Together.

One different direction.

Left instead of right.

North instead of south.

We never meet.

Come on, girl.

I can use your help at the nurse center.

way to room one, where the spirits of the white evil murderers Miller and Nash

have been known to frequent, a truly evil point in U .S. history.

The Chetco tribesmen were forced to the coast by westward expansion, and because

Miller knew they had the most fertile land in the area, he had to have it. He

recruited his buddy Nash to come help him take over the land by any means

necessary.

Let's go.

Why don't you lead the way there, rooster?

Flashlight. Oh yeah, we don't use flashlights.

We investigate in the absolute darkness.

Are you fucking with me?

Yeah, um, I would also like a flashlight.

We don't use light.

We got night vision on these cameras.

Besides, light makes the spirits shy.

Okay, well that's bullshit.

Listen, doll.

I don't know what kind of expert you claim to be, but... Okay, first of all,

a goddamn doctor.

Second of all, Dr.

Harding, who is brilliant, is the expert. And he is an expert at exposing

frauds. Hustlers like you and your moody, gypsy host, that dunderhead

cameraman... Okay? He's made it his life's mission to show the public that

and shows like yours are just an attempt, pathetic in my opinion, for

I assure you, we're real.

Watch the reruns, sweetheart.

You'll have all the evidence you need.

Okay. Listen to me, you hamster dick frat reject.

You call me dollar, sweetheart.

One more fucking time, I'm gonna get a knife, and I'm gonna cut off your...

What in the fuck's name of Robert E. Lee was that?

Get in there, rooster.

What do you think you're doing?

Did you hear Drex?

I'm a major part of this investigation.

I'm not ready. I'm going in.

I'm not ready yet.

All right, Luke. Come on, Doc. Let's get in there.

No. I am not going to be led through this sideshow like some hick from

going to a county carnival.

Doc, you're overthinking it. There's ghosts here in that room.

Just step inside.

Drex, we got cameras up all around the house.

Mics are up.

Sounds good.

Yeah, roger that, Brian. We just heard an unknown noise coming from up the

stairs. We're moving forward to investigate.

Is that you, Miller?

I've got some questions about those Native Americans you murdered over 150

ago.

Your time is up.

You can't hide anymore, Miller.

Alright, let's go.

Oh, fuck no.

What the fuck was that?

A worthy adversary.

We're coming up, Miller.

Get in there, rooster.

I tried to be polite, Jonathan, but you said there ain't no fucking flashlights.

So use your damn night vision.

Something just laughed, and then something else just fucking growled.

I'm getting those night shivers, boy.

Uh, yeah, I would also like you to lead the way. That being said, I rescind my

earlier comment about cutting off your small penis.

Who told you it was small?

It's not small.

Okay, listen, sweetheart.

Something just growled at us from the darkness.

You don't have a flashlight, which is super convenient, and you're worried

a small penis statement?

Watch out.

Is this supposed to scare me?

Why don't you just get on with your investigation?

I know in editing you're going to add in some music and special effects.

Hello, spirits.

I'm Lou.

I'm not here to harm you.

I want to help you.

If you want me to help you, please give me a sign.

Woo, woo, woo.

You've fallen for the lies that this show has fed you.

Spirits cannot make noise because spirits simply do not exist.

As you were saying, Doctor?

Yes.

Yes, women's spirits are...

More receptive to joy and empathy.

Lovely spirit.

Beautiful Native American woman.

Can you tell me your name?

Drex, we got some weird shit going on around the house.

I'm seeing spikes in temperature.

Spikes in atmospheric pressure and quick birth.

I'm seeing spikes in audio.

I've never had this much concrete proof in my life.

Hey there, Monty.

You okay in here?

What are you doing?

Mr. Ressler.

I'm just switching out a mattress.

Anyway.

I can see that.

We're kind of in the middle of an investigation.

You got to do that right now.

Oh.

Sorry.

I don't know if you know anything about hotel management.

But...

We got a bad review on the Yelps.

Yes.

They said that the sheets on this particular bed were too stained.

They said, and I quote,

it was like the sheets were from under a flock of condors.

The sheets looked like a fertility clinic.

So, I don't know if you know this, but views

All. Everything.

It's coming from over here.

Well, open it.

I want to help you.

But I can't help you if I don't know the whole story.

I want to know what really happened.

I want to know details about your life.

Before and after death.

Sounds like you were happy here.

The simplicity.

The forest.

The rivers.

The freedom.

Now,

Tell me about Mr.

Miller.

Keep going, Lou.

You've got a real voice with these spirits. They like you. Keep going.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but you ladies are stuck here.

But it's a choice.

You're connected to the children that are here and the lovers that were burnt

alive.

You would rather be here in this torturous darkness with them

than... than go outside to the afterlife that was promised to you by your

elders.

Be brave.

They will follow.

It feels extremely...

Cold in here all of a sudden.

I feel it too.

You really reach new spirits, Lou.

I will walk with you.

Outside.

Outside. Away from this hell.

Go to the afterlife.

Take my hand.

And I will take you to the afterlife.

Give me a reason. Show me a sign that you are ready to leave this place.

Drex, they got some serious shit going on with Dr. Harding's group. Get back to

the nerve center.

All groups, get back to the nerve center. Now!

Yeah, roger that, Brian.

We need to report back to the nerve center.

Brian's just reported that we have...

An accident with group number three.

Group... That's my brother's group.

Wait, what kind of accident? I don't know who or what exactly.

I just know that we need to get back to the nerve center.

Okay.

Well, ladies and gentlemen, for the first time in the history of Beyond the

Shadows, we are pausing the investigation.

Due to an accident with one of our groups. We don't know the severity or

exactly has been injured All I do know is that the Chetco River Lodge is most

certainly haunted and I'm concerned for myself and the rest of The guests

in the lodge

We gotta get back to the nerve center.

What?

God, your tendencies are so obvious.

What, your tricks and effects aren't working?

Not enough scares for the kitties back at home?

Look, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now.

Because Brian said that there was an accident with the other group.

What? So we're going to reconvene back at the nerve center so some interns can

set up some Indian ghosts and sheaths? Native Americans.

What? They prefer to be called Native Americans.

Fuck you.

Okay, I'm into the whole lesbian librarian thing, sweetheart. It does it

It really does. But you might be too smart and too sensible for even my

preferred sexual appetite.

Rooster, even you know the politically correct term is Native American, right?

I don't think they give a fuck what we call them. I think they're just pissed

because we stole their land.

What was that?

Girls.

Is this live right now?

Girls.

As much as it hurts.

I gotta get you back to the nerve center.

Okay, just give us a fucking minute.

Hey, Jonathan?

Yeah? Close the door.

Let's go. It won't be long.

It won't be too long.

I just don't want you to make our guests uncomfortable, okay?

Do you hear those screams?

I wonder if those were the screams of somebody in our group, or if they were a

spirit.

Another lost soul.

Drex, those screams really scared me. Can I stay close to you?

Yes, of course.

Whoa!

I must insist that we go to another area of the house immediately.

Now.

Okay.

Here we go.

Hey.

Where's my brother?

Yeah.

Where's Harding? Where's...

Where's Coxman?

Where's Coxman?

He's with the girls.

He must be.

No, Mr.

Faust.

Unfortunately, Mr.

Coxman isn't and won't be chasing any girls anytime soon.

I don't exactly know how it happened, but it appears that an

arrow hit him. hit him in the head.

Um, did you just say that Coxman got hit in the head with a

bow and arrow?

She did say that, Drexler.

We didn't see the bow.

Johnny just kind of fell back and he had a damn arrow sticking out of his eye.

viewers bravo this show is real bitch you have power if you have a gift so

that educated bitch smile off of your face or what oh hey okay okay

enough enough ladies enough that was fun but

it's cool down all right that was

invigorating we need to get back to The nerve center.

Figure out what the hell is going on.

Okay? Keith, keep the camera rolling.

We'll find the rest of the crew.

Okay?

Everything's going to be fine.

Right, Monty?

Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Here we go.

Enough. Enough.

I am fine.

I did, however, witness a horrible murder.

We witnessed a murder.

You can't tell me you're still a non -believer. We had two cameras and audio

that room. You saw it. You saw it with your fucking four eyes.

Don't you fucking speak to him that way, you goddamn mongloid. I will have you

know. Yes, yes, yes.

We know Harding is brilliant. We know.

Brian?

Let me see that footage. I hope that footage is complimenting.

What the fuck are you doing, bro?

Just admiring.

It's not gay for another man to pay another man a compliment.

You have a very rugged look.

Ladies and gentlemen, we have evidence of paranormal activity.

We have proof.

The spirits have attacked not one, but two of our crew members tonight.

This investigation is not over.

My team, along with Rooster, will be going to check on the bodies of Lou and

Coxman.

My bet is that they're passed out, and we'll be going to wake them up.

Team Sammy here will be investigating the rest of the house.

We want to make sure that there's no outsiders causing any interference.

Brian, you keep us up to the second with anything you see or hear.

Monty, you can be... Where's Monty?

Monty's gone.

Here's a better question, bro. Where's that wacky medium?

Don't worry about Phantasma.

She's fully involved in this investigation.

in our own way.

Mr. Miller, I can feel you in the room.

I've heard the truth.

From the people you've murdered.

From the Chetco.

From the women.

From the children.

I've heard directly from their mouth of you

of the horror

of the blood

Are you ready to play?

We're currently in a dark stairwell in search of my co -host and dear, dear

friend, Cogsman.

Dr. Bright and our...

Super fanboy rooster here.

Claim that Coxman may have been hit in the eyeball with a bow and arrow.

I don't know. I've never seen this myself.

But my instincts tell me that a spirit of darkness

may have possessed him.

I don't know.

Overcome by fear and emotion, I think he may have just passed out from shock.

We'll see.

You know, I've never experienced anything like this either.

I was touched by a ghost, though.

Where?

It grabbed my ass, and when I wasn't offended, it went a bit further.

I meant... Where did the location of the ghost molestation occur?

Not where did it touch you on your body?

Oh. It happened behind a dumpster at Applebee's.

God damn it. I love me some Applebee's, boy.

Everybody loves fucking Applebee's.

I'm sorry.

That was inappropriate.

Do you think that's where it happened?

Damn sure is Drexler right there where all that blood is

Oh

That smells like blood No

tastes like blood team reef

There has to be a reasonable explanation for this.

Doc, we saw Lou die. You and I were there.

Calvin. Calvin.

You know that I think you are a brilliant man.

Okay? I have built my career around your genius.

You know that my opinion of you is very high.

And that my feelings for you...

Or even stronger.

Perception can be altered by fear.

Yes, that's true.

But what I saw cannot be explained by science. Everything can be explained by

science, Doctor.

Emma, that's what science is.

Science has its place, Doc.

Some shit can't be explained.

Now let's follow that creepy laughter.

Drex, I have several anomalies. I have fluctuations in audio in rooms 1 and 3.

I have changes in temperature in the basement. And I swear, on my

grave, I somehow look like a little kid with a weapon in the basement.

Holy shit.

I sound like a real investigator.

Do you hear that?

Since we can't find Coxman, I think we need to explore that sound.

I assure you, I will not rest until I find my friend.

know what's in this room, but ladies and gentlemen, we might have for the first

time live on camera the moment we capture a spirit here at Checo River

Lodge.

I'm going to open the door.

Hey, Doc, tell me about your science theory now.

This proves nothing.

I do not believe that a spirit is creating a laughter.

I do not believe that a spirit can emit sound.

I'm just doing some goddamn detective work to find the evidence that your

your show, your whole television network are planting devices to fool the

American public.

Open it, then.

Prove to me that science rules all.

Hm.

Monty!

Monty!

Ah!

Care to...

Explain. What happens?

I'm, uh, in some Tibetan quarters.

They like to... How's your investigation?

The investigation is going precisely as I have designed.

May I ask why are you're... What are you doing with the glasses and champagne?

Well, what?

In my, I like, with my private chambers, I like to do some

things.

And why are you panicking? I get hot.

You know, it is scientifically proven that linens do not make you feel any

lightweight or body temperature does not vary.

Mine are made out of wool.

Alright, if never the mind comes, it's fine.

I don't know, Doctor.

What the fuck is going on? None of this can be explained by science.

Emma, I know that their methods and practices are rather refined, but we

question the legitimacy and the irrationality of their... How can you...

has to be an explanation.

I can't believe this is fucking happening.

This is fucking real.

We gotta go.

Doc!

She's gone.

Alright, Keith. Stay with me.

Egg up.

Looks like he could use some bubbles.

I can dig a bath.

Most people don't need that.

our quick, clean heart.

I like that.

I'll tell you why.

The bad is all about you.

It's not about them.

Just silence.

No one else.

Silence.

And relaxation.

That moment when all... ...the noise...

...grips away.

Does the noise ever go away completely?

The mind's neighbor goes away completely.

Doc, I think that's the spirit.

Nothing. I've got nothing.

Hi,

little girl.

We're not going to hurt you.

We just don't want to help you.

What's your name?

My name's Drex.

to go around a limb here, ma 'am.

I don't usually do this.

I don't usually try to tell people what they're going through, but here goes.

I think you are a lost soul.

I think you think you need to stay here, but you don't.

You can leave this place.

You can leave this world.

And then I told my therapist, it's not sexual addiction to be in a three -way

with an old man and a little person if it's all consensual.

We need to get the fuck out of here!

Follow me.

I'll take care of you.

You're so beautiful.

My name is Eve.

I won't hurt you. I could never hurt you.

What's your name?

You never say that you love me.

Or maybe sometimes you do.

You always hold it above me.

What can I do?

All these faces between us.

Made up of silver and gold.

Sending flowers to Venus because the weather there is so cold.

All

the

principal colors.

That evolve in your face Possessing magical powers

Sending flowers to space The flowers all bloom

in the moon I,

you, we take the

Negative faces That you don't paint with your brush

Beautiful figures and faces

My blood starts to run

Let the critics discover

Uncover another mistake

All the flowers for Venus are floating down in the lake.

The water's so blue.

I, you, we take the