Original subtitles

Rams got the ball.

Damn. Bucky.

Oh, come on. Get him.

Intercept. Intercept.

Oh, God.

Touchdown. 18.

Oh, Gertrude, that's Bill Ubell. He's the Rams' halfback.

They're the other team, Gertrude. Sorry, Bucky.

And that flanker back, Lee Williams. Christ, he never misses a kick, that son

a... There goes that Bill Ubella again. Shoot!

Bramlin's beating the bigots off us.

Now, Bucky, don't get so upset.

You know what's... 14 to nothing, and we're in the big five.

Isn't that number 39, Jim Norris, their full tail?

Full tail?

Geez, Jim Norris is their fullback.

Oh, Ram, that's knocking the ground part of us.

It's a freaking shame.

Bill Ubell, number 25, Lee Williams, number 27.

Yeah, yeah.

How do they do it? Oh, Jim Norris, 39.

You know, it must be Coach Henson.

Mother Hen Henson.

Maybe.

A secret formula, Bucky?

Yeah, where does a dump like Ramley get all that piss and vinegar from anyway?

Bucky! Okay.

Give us an R! Give us an R! Give us an R -A -M! Give us a B!

Give us an L! Give us an I -N -G!

Ramley! Ramley!

Yay, Ram!

Thank you.

Speaking. Come up and see me at the VG Clipper.

Number one. Number one.

Number one. I think you is number one, so take the night off and have some fun.

Ready? Kick ass.

Oh, and here's to Mother Hen Henson, huh?

What did you have in mind?

Sit on it, Lee.

I mean, are you going to hang around here or what?

Well, we haven't decided yet.

All right, what I'm going to do, I'm going to spend the whole time in bed

Mailer and Zallinger and Vonnegut. Maybe I can slip in disguised as Fitzgerald.

Yeah.

Hey,

we'll be back in about a minute.

Well, we have to see a man about a dog.

Right. We'll be back with that. About a dog.

A dog?

What's the mystery, Monica?

I don't know.

Who's he?

I don't know.

He looks awfully familiar.

Yeah, he does.

Maybe he doesn't.

I wonder what he's doing here, anyway.

I think... I think I know a way that we can find out.

Just leave it to me, gang.

Well, boys, that's it.

Any comments?

Well, it sounds great with me, Mr. Ramling. A week in Bell Harbor. And all

expenses paid.

I don't know, Mr. Ramling.

Ramling has been really good to us, and I don't think I could do that to him.

Jim, football isn't a popularity contest.

Somebody always gets hurt, right?

Let's look at it this way. What does rambling you have to offer?

A second -rate academic program, a poorly financed athletic department.

And what about status?

A degree from rambling you is practically meaningless in the right

If you know what I mean.

I don't know.

All right, what does State you have to offer?

My everything, gentlemen.

everything. A degree from state you as your passport to success.

That is, if you qualify.

That's why we're inviting you down to our conference in Bell Harbor.

We'll see if we like each other and if you're the kind of individual state you

can accept.

Now, if you prove your athletic ability, we can arrange a scholarship and a very

lucrative living allowance.

Well, boys, What's your decision?

Sounds okay to me.

It's okay here.

Help me in. Well, good.

That's settled.

I'm sure you'll have a great time at Bell Harbor.

After that, God willing, we'll see you off to State U.

Whoops. I really want to meet Coach Wilson.

Oh, well, he'll be there, too. And I'm sure he'll give you a stimulating

workout.

That son of a bitch is offering them the world. A degree from State U is a

passport to success.

God damn it, rambling you is in real trouble, traitors.

What are we going to do?

I don't know, Monica.

Don't they shoot traitors? Only in time of war.

Well, what do you call this?

Heavy.

That does it.

We'll just fight by...

I sign up to date you, where are we next year?

Let's face it, Coach, it's bad news.

Don't you girls think you're overreacting?

I heard it with my own ears.

Langley is offering them scholarships, money, everything.

You believe I think of sleep sex?

My hat's off to modern technology.

Look, Coach, what is rambling you going to do?

Nothing. Nothing?

that if our star players go to State U, the Rams are lost.

You've got to realize that we are a small college.

There's no way Ramblin' can afford a recruiting program.

The best we can offer them is a damn good education.

Education?

Well, maybe if you talked with them.

I don't think that would accomplish anything.

Besides, I've been looking forward to this camping trip all year.

And in the morning, I'm going straight to the mouth.

In the team's van?

Sure, I'm the coach.

So true. Yeah, well, thanks for everything, coach.

Have a nice trip. I hope it's off a 50 -foot cliff.

Okay.

See you now, girls.

All right, girls.

I'll give you 30 seconds to tell me who this famous personality is.

Okay?

It's Hill of the Huns. Come on, girls. Be serious.

I'll give you a hint.

She's a famous movie star.

Harp Omar.

I got it.

Lassie.

Funny. Don't you think I look like... No.

Look what I have.

Fresh.

Bratty. God, I'm so hungry. It's a curd.

Oh. Did you make these yourself?

I sure did.

Monica.

Sissy, you're a regular. Julie, our child.

Tony, somebody, give me a towel.

I want to take a shower. Come on, you can take a shower with me.

Here's your towel.

Yeah, but he's a traitor.

You girls are about as much fun as an autopsy.

And I suppose at a time like this, you want to cut up. Well, what the hell are

we supposed to do? Mope around for the rest of our lives?

Well, nobody likes to be on a losing team.

You know damn well once our boys go to Bell Harbor, we're sung.

Well, maybe they won't like it there.

Maybe the state you dudes won't like them.

I doubt it.

Hey, maybe she's right.

Fat chance.

No, no, no.

What if they don't play well?

What if they really screwed up?

What if they had such a miserable time that they'd reject State U's offer or

vice versa?

No way. Have you ever been to Bell Harbor?

It's beautiful.

The beach, the sun.

Holy shit. No, Cheryl, you're missing the whole point.

What if four little cheerleaders took a little trip to Bell Harbor and

deliberately sabotaged... their whole conference.

Yeah, and while they're down there, maybe recruit some new state youth

and come back to rambling you as a hero.

Hero? You mean the hard stuff?

Look, girls, I hate to burst your bubble, but how are we supposed to

all this? We don't have any scholarships to offer them, and we have no money to

bribe them with. What do we have?

What do we have?

Here's what we have.

Mirror? Oh, we've got the greatest asset rambling you ever had. Us.

And are we going to use it? Yeah.

Monica, I think you've got it.

Is it catching?

Now, the big problem. Wheels, bread, and a place to stay.

Well, I've got $50. And I've got about the same.

Well, I can scrape up another.

I can dig up 50, so that makes 250.

Well, that should cover food and gas.

But what about wheels and a place to stay?

I've got the wheels.

Come on, Daddy.

We'd have to pay a junkyard to take that wreck.

We've got to get there fast.

What we need is a van or something like that.

Yeah, maybe we can get a tent.

Tent?

Yeah, I'll go camping out.

Like Coach Henson.

Coach Henson.

Fan.

Tent.

What do you think?

Mission?

What kind of mission?

To Harvard!

Well, in essence, the wall's off, but I don't know.

Oh, I love it. This is what I call roughing it. Yeah, it's not enough. It

back to nature.

Well, that should about do it.

Are you ready for the recruits, girls?

The question is, are they ready for us? Yay.

All right, let's go. Sit up. Come on, sit up.

Damn it. I don't believe it.

They've got Stanley Krause from Alabama U and Bruce Jacobs from UCLA.

Let me see.

Can you see O .J. Simpson?

I don't see Mitch Stevens.

Who's he?

He's only state youth's best player.

He played on the all -star team this year.

Oh, is he cute?

I'll say.

What do you think?

for me anytime.

Cheryl, what do you mean?

How should we approach this?

Why not the rare approach?

Oh, I like that.

Oh, you would.

Listen, Tony, we can't make it obvious. We've got to make it look casual -like.

That sounds great, but how?

Damn it, I don't know.

Uh -oh, girls, we've got competition.

Tony, what is it? Quit hogging the glasses, will you?

what's wrong.

So that's Langley's bait.

Yeah, and the guys are taking it hook, line, and sinker. Gonna make our work a

lot harder, girl.

Maybe we could have them eliminated.

No.

We could hire a hitman.

Oh, sure. What are we gonna pay them with?

Well, maybe they take credit cards.

So, girls, I'm getting hungry. Let's go back to camp.

Oh, you girls go ahead.

I'm gonna look around a while.

Okay, we'll see you later, Roger.

Take care.

I can have you arrested as a spy.

Oh, I wasn't spying. Oh, yeah?

Hey, aren't you Mitch Stevens?

Sounds familiar.

Yeah, that's who I am, Mitch Stevens.

Well, why aren't you out there?

Why should I? I'm already recruited.

Oh, of course.

Oh, I'm sorry. Don't tell me.

You're from Rambling U, and you're a cheerleader.

And your name is, let me think, your name is... Monica. Monica, that's right.

Well, Monica, what are you doing in Bell Harbor?

Oh, we're just here on vacation.

Oh, who's we?

My girlfriends and I. We just decided to come here for a few days.

Well, do you always travel with these?

Oh, just checking out the scenery.

Yeah, the scenery's pretty lovely from here, isn't it?

Have you noticed the curves on the shoreline?

You know, and I also really like how the way the dunes stack up, yeah.

All in all, I'd say it's a pretty beautiful picture. Well, Mitch, it's

meeting you, but I have to go now.

Hey, why don't we get together sometime, let's say tonight around 8 o 'clock at

the Rat's Nest?

Rat's Nest? What's that?

It's just a hangout for the players. Hey, listen, it's a real dive. You'll

it.

I'll see you there.

What's up?

I think I ran out of gas.

You can help me out? I don't think so, but I think you can help us.

One, two, three, four!

You're lean and hungry, look.

The mystery champ, the devil's look.

Flashes you and makes you look. Inside, you'll be felt.

Surveyor of the circumstance.

Call the dance, take a stand.

In truth, there's no romance.

Wise men have chance.

And this time...

Wow, something.

Now I can see why you really want him on the team. How'd you figure that one

out? Well, I don't know. I guess I'm just right.

This place is really the living end.

Who's end are you talking about?

All right, girls. Fun time is over.

Now we move on to phase one.

Approach and attack.

I'll take Stanley Krause.

That's the one I wanted.

Both of you can have him.

Tony, you're on your own.

I'll work on Mitch if he ever gets here.

You know, if you can get Mitch Stevens to sign up with the Rams, that would

really make the headlines.

Speak of the devil.

You've got to be kidding.

Now get out of here. Go on.

Well, I see you made it.

Oh, hi, Mitch.

Yeah, I had nothing else to do.

Nothing else to do?

Thanks a lot. Oh, I didn't mean it that way. What I meant was... I think you'd

better stop while you're ahead.

Okay. What are you drinking? I'm... Bartender. Two beers.

You're lean and hungry.

I sure would like to dance.

You want to dance?

Not with you, you stupid.

Oh!

I sure would like to find some nice southern gentleman who'd like to dance

a couple of southern bells like us.

Aren't you from Alabama?

Yes, ma 'am.

Well, wouldn't you like to know where we're from?

Yes, ma 'am. God, I thought he'd never ask.

Well, we're from the South, too.

You know, Grids and Black Eyed Peas and Billy Carter.

Black Dan.

Yes, ma 'am.

Well, wouldn't you like to dance with us?

Yes, ma 'am.

Is that all you can say is yes, ma 'am? No, ma 'am.

To my side and look at you Bring my lips close to your silken ear Whisper a song

of truth I'm gonna find

Hey, that's amazing. We're both majoring in biology.

Yeah.

Hey, you never told me what you're doing here for the summer.

I'm working for my professor.

He has a lab set up on his boat.

Damn it, that reminds me.

I have to go check out some tests.

You want to come along? I'll show you the lab.

Sure, I'd love to.

Hang in there, sissy. Remember, it's for rambling you.

The door?

Yes, ma 'am.

What are you going to do now?

Nothing. Just keep your eyes and ears open and we'll find a way.

Just remember, act surprised.

Well, I'll be an ice cube in hell, girls. Look who's here.

Well, just jump on my back and call me Trigger. If it isn't rambling news,

What are you guys doing here?

Came down to kill some time.

Yeah, I can see that.

I thought they came down... What a coincidence.

We're all here together.

Isn't it a coincidence?

Tell us, Bill, do your playmates have names?

Yeah, I'm sorry.

Cheryl, Tony, Monica, and Sissy. This is Honey.

Ginger and sugar.

Sounds like a recipe for a fruitcake.

We're awfully pleased to meet you.

Same here.

Oh, you're those little cheerleaders from Rambling U.

I've always admired you girls. You know, it's just amazing how you get the

courage to get up in front of a crowd and make fools of yourself.

I think it's just wonderful how you cheerleaders give your all for your

Well, we'd love to thank you, Jack, but we do have reservations.

Ciao, ciao.

Arrivederci.

Toodle -oo.

Up yours.

Adios, amigo.

Listen, I'm going with Mitch. See what you can find out.

See you later.

Now what are we going to do?

Let me handle it.

Just get Stanley and be ready to leave in a minute. What makes you think he's

going to come?

Just tell him we have cold, red, and green.

He'll come.

You

guys

are going to take a lot of state years.

The preview looks good.

Well, there's a few things you'll have to get adjusted to. What do you mean by

that? The date and standards are far superior, and you won't find any cheap

cheerleaders there.

We mentioned it to you, but he's throwing a cocktail party tomorrow

and he wants it all there.

Oh, yeah? And what's that for?

Oh, it's just a little get -together party.

You'll meet the dean and his wife and the faculty members.

Are you ready? Yeah, in a minute.

All right, buddy, put your hands up.

What about Fleetwood Mac? Oh, yeah, they're great.

Yeah, aren't they? Do you like the Grateful Dead? Sure, I love them. They

all their albums.

Hey, so do I. Really? Well, this is it. This is where the lab is. What do you

think? Oh, not bad.

What's he researching?

Well, don't laugh now, but we're finding ways to control human parasites.

Oh, you mean like fleas and life?

Yeah, and much more.

Here.

This is great.

Yeah.

Hey.

What serious pubis?

Oh, those little buggers are crabs.

Crabs? Oh, where'd you get them?

Off a toilet seat. Where else? No.

Are you all set for next year?

I mean, have you registered for the next semester yet?

You mean am I going to play for State U or not?

Well, yeah.

Well, I haven't officially registered, and so far there haven't been any better

offers.

Oh, you mean you'd consider another offer?

Well, maybe.

What do you have in mind?

Nick, I'm going to level with you.

The girls and I aren't here on vacation.

We're here to recruit some new players for the Rams.

If we strengthened just a couple of our positions, rambling you would be

unbeatable. What do you think?

I think you're adorable.

No, I mean about the team.

Hey, I think they're a good team, but I think you're dynamite. You really think

so? Yeah.

You mean about the team?

I really don't know, but let me see.

Yeah,

they're good.

I'd better go, Mitt.

Hey, just like that?

Yeah, I have to get up early. I have a lot of things to do. Hey, will we be

to see each other soon?

Okay?

Okay.

Try to understand, Stanley.

If you sign up with the Rams, that will mean we'll have the best tackle of any

school. Now, how about that, huh, Stanley?

Well, I don't know, ma 'am.

He needs more wine.

Look, Stan, if you sign with the Rams, you could possibly go to the Rose Bowl.

I can see the headlines now.

Stanley Krause single -handedly wins the Rose Bowl game.

I don't know, ma 'am.

What don't you know, Stanley?

Letting me alone with him for a while.

Well, we got to lose, Cheryl.

Okay.

Well, I sure could use some fresh air.

Oh, yeah, yeah. Me too.

That sounds like a good idea.

You stay here.

Stanley, you know, we could offer you more than a scholarship in...

Football.

Yes, ma 'am.

Wow, your muscles are so tight.

Bet it's from carrying all those heavy balls.

You need a good massage.

Doesn't that feel good?

Yes, ma 'am.

Doesn't that feel good?

Now, I bet you'd like to see what we can really do for you.

Uh -huh.

Yes, ma 'am. You know what else, Stanley?

It's only half of it.

What do you think?

Wouldn't you like to tackle this?

Uh -huh.

Yes, ma 'am.

Well, what are you waiting for?

I've heard a boy say if I left green, you know that I've made it.

There's a price for a fine green, you know that I've made it.

I don't want to have to go back home without having made it.

I've got the country boy.

On the streets of downtown urban mania.

There's a lot of things I'd like to say, but you know I'll be plain.

Well?

Well, I don't know, ma 'am.

Oh, God.

Let me handle this.

Okay, Stanley. Are you ready for the second half?

Come real close. Yes, ma 'am.

Woman, it's all up to you now.

By the way,

Remember, it's for Brambley.

Okay, Stanley.

It's your turn to play defense now, baby.

41, 32, 69, height!

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Well, Stanley, are you ready to score in those touchdowns?

I'm fine.

I'm fine.

He

what?

Signed up with the Rams?

That's right, Mr.

Langley. We tried to warn you about those girls. Yes, yes, yes, I know.

But how was I to know those cheerleaders were recruiters?

All right.

They outsmarted us with Stanley Krause.

But we'll be one step ahead of them this time.

What I want you girls to do is keep your eyes on those rambling you guys.

And don't let those preposterous pom -pom pussycats near them. Do you

understand? Yes, sir.

Yes, sir. And another thing. Keep those cheerleaders away from my cocktail

party. Yes, sir.

Okay, boy.

Remember when you get this heap started.

I want you straight out of this county.

And I don't ever want to see your face again.

Got that? Yes.

No way. They got security all around the house.

I think they're on to us, Monica.

There's got to be a way. We've just got to get in.

Huh?

Um, what are we going to get in for?

Look, dum -dum, we have to find a way to make that cocktail party a bomb. We

don't want our guys to have a good time, now do we?

Oh, I guess not.

Well, why don't we throw our own party instead?

Oh, come on. Hey, that's a great idea.

You mean now?

No, I mean Friday night.

We'll show our guys what a real party is.

Yeah, yeah, that's great, but how do we go about screwing up Langley's party?

I think there's just got to be a way.

What about our disguise?

Oh, we must be kidding.

I've got it! I've got it!

Thank you.

Oh,

boys.

This is Dean Higgins and Mrs. Higgins. This is Bill

Ubell. Nice to meet you. Lee Williams.

sir. And Jim Norris.

Oh, how you doing? Soon to be formally with the Rambling University.

Very pleased to meet you, young man. You must find it very exciting to have the

chance to be accepted by one of the most prestigious schools in the country.

Don't you think so, my dear? Oh, yes, yes, indeed.

You should be very honored.

Pardon me.

Punch anyone?

Oh, just a little.

Do you have any beer?

No, dear. I do hope that you boys will be an asset to the university,

scholastically as well as athletically.

Thank you.

Cheers. Cheers.

What's in the punch? Absolutely nothing. We're going to have to fix that.

Cheryl, see what's in the kitchen.

Sissy, start hawking your brownies, okay?

Tony and I will do the same. Right.

Right.

And I'm sure you'll enjoy our golf course.

I'll be right back. I have a sweet blank.

Later. Bye.

Tell me, boys, are you finding Bell Harbor enjoyable?

Yeah, it's just fine.

Well, you certainly should.

Yes, it's very nice to be here, ma 'am. Isn't this a wonderful old house?

Brownies, anyone?

Oh, no, thank you, dear. Try one. They're really good and practically no

calories. Well, if you insist.

This house has quite a history. And did you boys know it's supposed to be

haunted?

Why, these brownies certainly are good, aren't they, boys? We'll have another.

It seems the original owner was a sea captain, and he returned home one day to

find his wife and another gentleman in a most shocking situation.

What kind of situation was that, ma 'am?

What happened next, ma 'am?

Well, he killed them.

That's right. Killed them both right upstairs.

And they say that even unto this day, his wife and her lover still

haunt those rooms. Really?

Brownie? Yeah, sorry.

Jesus, you look familiar.

What's your name?

Maria.

That's it, Maria Gonzalez.

Maria? Aren't you the girl that I... No, speak English. Adios.

Language. I'm sure they're quite capable, but I cannot give my approval

personally see them play.

Oh, but Dean, their academic records are perfect. Screw their brains. Can they

play? I guarantee it, sir. I cannot accept that. I want to see them play.

my neck, you know. Well, then, how about day after tomorrow? All right, that's

just fine. Young lady.

Yes, sir?

Another one of those brownies, please.

Believe it, Finn!

Hey, you know, I can't wait to introduce you to the other guys. They really

think you're something, Mitch. Hey, well, listen, it's just going to have to

some other time. I really got to get to work, okay? Oh, yeah, hey, okay.

See you.

Take care. See you at practice. Right.

You won't believe this, young man, but when I was young, I had quite a figure.

So many gentlemen proposed marriage to me.

And it would make your head spin.

These traps are rambling you.

Oh, you're so low.

Punch.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Please don't push me. I didn't push you.

Bitches. Mom, did we ever screw up that car, y 'all?

Well,

man, I'll tell you. Well, man, let me tell you. This is the greatest.

That's the greatest kick -ass mother.

Shoot. We did a great job, damn it.

Hey, anybody want some more brownie?

Did you ever consider having yourself committed?

Hey, Monica.

Oh, God, it's the bionic beauty.

Hold the fort, ladies. I'll be right back.

Hey, what are they saying?

He's saying, look, Scar, you and me gonna make whoopee my teepee.

Oh, and she's saying, why, Red Butler, I haven't the faintest idea what you're

talking about.

Don't give me any of your bull, woman. When sun sets, you and me gonna make

humpum. Humpum for wampum?

No wampum, no humpum.

Come on, now. Let's get back on the track.

What are we going to do about the guy? Damn it.

Come on, Monica. Get with it.

And wipe that ghostly smile off your face.

Ghostly?

Ghostly, girls.

This place is really creepy at night. Are you sure this is going to work?

I don't know, but Monica said so. That's easy for her to say. She's out on a

date with Mitch.

Come on, let's move it. I don't want to go.

What's wrong now?

Well, it might really be haunted. Get your hands back on the ladder.

Well, what if it really is?

Listen, you guys, there's no such thing as ghosts.

Okay, Cheryl, move it or lose it.

I'm not going to go first.

Okay, sissy, you go.

I'm not going.

Well, I'm scared.

You chicken shits. All right, follow me.

Hey, I'm up here, you ninnies.

What are you thinking about?

Us.

And?

And also how I should be thinking about the girls and how they're doing without

me.

What's the matter?

Shh.

Listen.

What the hell is that?

What the hell do you think it sounds like?

It sounds like somebody's having a lot of fun.

Jesus Christ, it's stereo.

Holy shit. That must be the captain's wife. Get out of here. There is no such

thing as ghosts.

Oh, John.

That must be the captain.

Let me go.

How many wives do you have?

I scared.

What are you scared about?

Worst thing that can happen is getting laid by a ghost.

Holy shit.

this house again. Do you hear me?

We did it. We spooked the traitor. I bet you we scared the shit out of those

bastards. Yeah, we're going for the kill at the pom -pom beach party.

You!

You! I don't know what moral principles they taught you at rambling you, but at

State U, they are high.

Gentlemen, I'll see you first thing in the morning.

Jim?

Monica?

Okay, bye.

Damn, they've been grounded.

And we did it all by ourselves.

What about the party?

We'll have a party, and with our...

before we get going.

Come on.

Come on, you guys. Shh, shh, shh, shh.

Quiet, be quiet.

Come on, don't be a jester.

Hey,

Jim, come on. It's party time.

Hey,

come on, Cheryl. Why don't you leave with me, okay?

I'd love to.

I'd love to jump every creep here, but I can't. I'm one of the hostesses.

Gosh, I sure would like to get to know you. I'd like to get to know you, too,

but not now, maybe later, sweetheart.

We're going to break their asses, once and for all.

I'll take care of this with one little phone call.

Later.

Hey, I hear you girls are dynamite cheerleaders. Why don't you do a cheer

us, huh? How about it? Come on.

He's on his way.

me two choices you can stay here the rest of your lives satisfying your

primitive desires and wallowing in your stupidity or you can leave instantly

thus transcending this barbaric low life and rising to a higher more

sophisticated cloth well

And as for you, Mitch, I'm very disappointed in you.

You represent the best of State U. How could you allow yourself to be drawn

to their level?

Hey, look, Mr. Langley, I resent the attitude you're taking. You resent?

Must I remind you that you have signed for next season and that you will

represent State U in the best of light?

You had no intention of ever joining.

You were just using me.

I was trying to tell you all evening.

Look, I wasn't trying to use you.

I really like you, Monica.

And I want to see you again and again.

Well, I don't.

I don't like liars.

There's nothing else to do, sissy.

It's over.

Girls, I've got to tell you something.

I've decided to quit the cheerleaders.

Why? Oh, Monica, come on. You know we've got a rotten team. What's the root for

losers?

We're going to miss you.

Come on, Sissy, don't take it so hard.

I can't help it. Everything's just been going wrong.

First we lost the guys, and, well, all these mosquitoes were keeping me up all

night. It was horrible.

Wait, what was that?

I said everything's going wrong and I can't... No, no. I mean about the

mosquitoes. Oh, damn.

Things were driving me crazy. I was just scratching and itching.

Oh, right, girls.

I've got it.

Hey, what's the theory of pubic?

Oh, these little buggers are crabs.

Great, let's get started.

These boys are as good as you say it can mean a great box office next season

Hell box office. What am I talking about?

I can get a great contract with the network 32

64 48

Here we

go.

Set.

Thank you.

Well, boys, it proves one thing.

You can't put a monkey in a suit and expect him to behave like a man.

But there's no room for monkeys at State U, and it's obvious that anyone from

rambling you has no moral integrity.

Moral integrity?

Did you hear that, guys? Moral integrity?

Who's the one offering these shady deals, huh? Free scholarships,

loans? And for what, because of our IQs? No, they want a piece of meat that can

play ball so they can raise their revenues.

Yeah, but when they talk, we don't have to go to class.

He's going to pass us as long as we're good on the field. But one fumble and

you're out on your ass.

You know what, Mr. Langley?

Why don't you take State University and shove it about ten feet up your ass?

Yeah, all right.

You know it, man.

Mitch.

Mitch, don't listen to them. They don't understand football.

They think it's just a game.

I'll tell you right now, though, it's big business. And if you're smart... You

won't pay any attention to what they're saying.

Hey, look, Mr. Langley, I don't think the way you do. And here's your

Hey, Monica.

Do you think I'm acceptable material for rambling you now?

Well, what do you think, girls?

Stand up and sing. Stand up and sing.

We're number one. We're number one.

Stand up and sing. Stand up and sing.

It's just begun.

It's just begun.

And though it seems just like we're losing, don't you worry.

We're number one.