Original subtitles

I'm Nick Kingston-Persons.

Hi, I'm Brick Street.

Brick, did you know that one in three adults suffers from high blood pressure?

Of course, I did. And you wanna know one of the causes?

Big, fat and sodium-filled meat food.

I wouldn't eat that, if I were you.

He's right. I probably shouldn't eat this.

No "probably" about it, Nick.

That burger looks sweeter than a coed in a bikini

on a beach in Malibu,

but it'll kill ya.

Just like that coed.

Bad food, bad women,

it's all bad, Nick.

Brick is right.

So, eat right. Get plenty of exercise.

Get your blood pressure checked.

And stay away from those coeds.

It just might save your life.

Got it, guys.

Okay, let's get some numbers, fellas.

Brick.

You know what's wrong with you?

Your feet.

They're facing the wrong way.

They should be facing the other way.

They should be moving.

Okay.

Nick, are you not gonna eat this?

No, we just finished talking about this.

So, what, if you're on a beach in Malibu,

you get hit on by a coed, you're gonna turn that down?

Yes.

Why? What, are you married?

Yes.

Actually, Nick, uh,

your blood pressure is, uh...

Is a little high.

High? How high?

145 over 98.

What?

I work out. I eat right.

Why would I have high blood pressure?

Maybe it's just stress.

Stress? So, what do I do now?

Lose the wife. That'll bring it down.

Or, uh, you could take some time off,

stay home, relax.

Maybe it's just stress.

Check back with me in a few days, huh?

How do I have high blood pressure?

I believe it.

Turning down burgers and Malibu coeds in bikinis?

You're stressing me out just thinking about it.

It's very selfish of you, Nick.

Are you feeling stressed?

Beat it.

♪ Are we there yet?

♪ Tell me, tell me, tell me

♪ Tell me, are we there yet?

♪ Are we there yet?

Hey, guys.

Hey, sweetheart.

Honey, what's wrong?

Remember how I told you

I was shooting that PSA today for hypertension?

Yeah. Well,

after, the doctor took my blood pressure.

He said it was high.

Oh, no.

He said maybe it was stress.

Stress?

That's what I said.

So, what do you do now?

He said, you know, take a few days off,

and just stay home and relax.

He'll check it again in a few days.

Man, I wish I had high blood pressure.

You know what,

if you want, I can stick your head in the toilet.

That might stress you out.

Well, I would try to stick yours in, but it won't fit.

Okay, okay, okay, okay!

That... That is done.

You see, your father is already stressed out, okay?

So, it is our job, until he gets better,

to make sure that he remains relaxed.

I cannot have my man sick.

What is so funny?

Well, sick is good, you know?

Okay, so look. If you, like, went to a young doctor, and you were like,

"Doctor, my man is sick."

He'd be like, "Ah, that's great."

And you'd be like, "No, he's seriously ill."

And he'd be like, "Oh, that's dope."

And you'd be like, "He's not on drugs.

"It's just high blood pressure."

And he'd be like, "Oh, that's booty."

And then you'd be like, "What does his booty have to do with this?"

Right?

Mom, are you sure I can't just stick his head in the toilet, just for a little bit?

No.

Hey, baby.

I have an idea.

I think I know just the thing

that you need to help you feel relaxed.

Oh, yeah? Yes.

Okay, so,

you know that beautiful bed-and-breakfast

up in Lake Stevens?

Yeah.

Well,

I was thinking

that we should go there for the weekend.

I mean, okay, look at this.

Can you... Look at that.

Can you imagine waking up there

on a Sunday morning?

Yeah, kind of.

Why you say it like that?

Well, you know,

it's the whole bed-and-breakfast thing, you know?

So what? You don't want to go?

Okay, Nick.

You can be honest.

Honesty stresses me out.

Nick.

It's just that you have this romantic idea

of how charming this whole thing is supposed to be.

And it stresses me out,

because when things don't go how they're supposed to go,

it's gonna be a problem.

Oh, so spending time with me is a problem now?

No, spending time with you at a bed-and-breakfast

is a problem, all right?

Those places are not charming.

Okay? They're creepy.

Nick, they're relaxing.

Baby, there is nothing relaxing

about staying in a 100-year-old house,

sleeping in a 50-year-old twin bed,

covered in a crocheted bedspread,

looking at shelves of scary dolls

and old books of poetry,

eating scones in the morning with strangers,

sharing the same bathroom.

Uh, no air-conditioning, no cable,

thin walls, one phone, and a 10:00 p.m. curfew.

Fine. We won't go.

I don't want you to get stressed out.

Sorry.

Yes!

Ha, ha.

Oh, don't be so happy with yourself.

If we were playing hopscotch, I'd be whuppin' your behind.

You know, we can play whatever you want to,

but it won't make it any easier.

So, uh, what do you wanna play next?

Hey, what's this one?

Ooh, I love that game.

Super Coupe City.

Really? How do you play it?

Well, it's a driving game where you make deliveries

to underworld kingpins.

And the driving missions get more dangerous

as you move up the ranks of organized crime.

I mean, it goes from making deliveries,

to stealing cars,

to having your own fleet of Coupe City riders.

Whoever can go the longest without getting caught by the police wins.

Huh, kind of like growing up in Oakland.

You know, I can never get past the mission

where you have to jack the perm truck

and then deliver it to the pimps.

Oh, yeah. That's hard. Well,

if all you need to know how to do is drive,

I can get past that level and every other one.

Oh, yeah? Oh, yeah.

Okay, we'll see about that.

The controls are in my dad's garage. Let's go.

Come on, baby. You ain't said nothing but a word.

Ooh.

Hello?

Hey, baby.

Nick,

this kitchen is a mess.

Yeah, I know. I tried to clean it,

but I couldn't get this burn spot out of the skillet.

And then I dropped a fork and stabbed myself in the toe.

The whole thing just was stressing me out.

Mmm-hmm. Well,

since you're not busy doing anything,

do you think maybe you could go pick up Lindsey from Kelly's house?

Oh, I don't know, baby. It's rush hour, you know.

People out there driving crazy, blowing horns,

and swerving all over...

Ooh.Stressful.

Right.

Well, since you can't clean

and you can't drive, do you think that maybe

you could call the Chinese restaurant

and order dinner for us tonight?

Or is that too stressful too?

Oh, I'll try. All right.

Look, drive safe, okay? It's crazy out there, baby.

So, you off all week?

Yep.

What is this,

turtleneck-for-no-reason week?

When did you learn to speak Russian?

When you bought that suit?

For your information,

Russia's not too far from here, and I'm outsourcing.

You know, a lot of these girls, they want to come to the States,

and I need cheap, beautiful labor.

They get work visas,

I get a stunning waitstaff. It's a win-win.

Well, I get it.

But that's not outsourcing.

Call it "insourcing," then.

You know, contrary to popular belief,

that burger is not gonna lower your blood pressure.

Did you even watch your PSA?

Hey, you know what?

My family's eating Chinese food.

Between getting worried about MSG,

and trying to avoid burgers, I just got too stressed out.

That's your story, and you're sticking to it.

You sticking with that suit?

I mean, does Suzanne even know you're down here?

I don't wanna get on her bad side.

I have been on a page in the diary of that mad black woman,

and I don't wanna be on another.

Don't worry about it, all right?

Sometimes, you have to do wrong to get right.

Like that suit.

Hey, man, wrong to you.

Right to every wannabe supermodel

from the Eastern Bloc.

Drop that. Drop... Drop it. Hey, hey!

Yo, hey, man. You're not gonna let me finish my burger?

I'll let you finish it.

Just as soon as you bring a note from your wife.

If you had a wife, you wouldn't be wearing that turtleneck.

Where have you been?

I was at Martin's bar.

Drinking?

Relaxing.

Oh.

So, you weren't relaxed enough

sitting around here doing nothing all day.

You had to go somewhere else and do nothing.

That's not what it was.

Okay, Nick.

This is not a joke,

this is not a vacation.

You're supposed to be trying to lower your blood pressure.

I am.

Baby, look, I've been taking it easy

just like the doctor ordered, all right?

And, honestly,

I've been feeling a lot more relaxed.

So, let's check your levels.

Where'd you get that?

Don't worry about it.

I wouldn't want you to get stressed out.

Oh, no.

This can't be right.

Your blood pressure is even higher?

Oh, baby, I didn't relax enough.

Will you rub my feet? Please?

Hey, good morning, baby.

Good morning.

What is that?

This is for you.

It is a beet, wheatgrass, ginger,

spinach, leek juice smoothie.

I'm cool.

No, you are not cool.

You have high blood pressure,

so drink this.

And put this on 'cause we have to go.

Where am I going?

We're not going for cheeseburgers,

I'll tell you that much.

Did Martin tell on me?

No, you told on you.

How?

When I did your laundry,

you had a French fry in your shirt pocket.

And if you must know,

you're going to a yoga class.

This is your outfit.

Did you get me a thong to go with these thongs?

Hey. Look, baby.

My body is not built for yoga, all right?

I'm getting stressed out just thinking about it.

Hey, Nick.

Suzanne told me you would be in my class.

Yeah, well, she didn't tell me.

Dropped me off like a drug mule.

Oh, you'll be fine.

All right. Welcome.

Reach your fingertips high to the sky,

relax your shoulders,

take a look at the thumbs,

and then swan dive,

forward fold, all the way down.

Plant your palms, set the left leg back,

followed by the right,

and you'll be in a high-plank type of push-up position.

Hut, hut, hut... Hut!

All right. Good,

and curve the hips up high, downward-facing dog.

Why don't we come into a pigeon pose?

Lift your right leg high,

and lift your hips up high.

You must be nuts.

Is this your first time? Yeah.

What makes you say that?

This outfit.

Look, look, why don't we try some other animals, okay?

Hey, check this out. I got this one.

It's a crane. Huh?

How about the crane?

It's good.

It's not yoga. That's The Karate Kid.

Come on, come on.

Okay. All right, it's time for some nitro.

So long, sucker!

She beat you like a terrorist.

Shut up.Hey.

Don't speak to your sister like that.

Just 'cause you can't hang.

Loser.

You know what? That's just her.

I can beat you any day.

Oh, really? You wanna put some money on that?

Yes.Okay.

One condition. What?

Can I practice with Marilyn first?

You know what?

You can practice with Danica Patrick if you want to, okay?

Just don't get mad when you lose your money.

Girl, why did you put me in the middle of this?

Look, can you please help me?

Oh, all right. I'll try.

All right. Yeah.

I'm ready.

Oh, Lord.

You so special.

I am so sore.

Whoo, that yoga is murder.

That woman had me in more poses

than America's Next Top Model.

Oh!

Really?

I can see why they say it reduces stress.

You're in too much pain to remember you had any.

Oh, please.

I know and you know that you only stayed in that class

for ten minutes.

Those were ten of the most flexible minutes of my life.

Did you know kangaroos have a yoga pose?

Uh, no.

Well, they do. And it hurts.

All right, well, maybe you'll feel better

after releasing some of those toxins.

She put me in the panda pose,

and that's not all I released.

You didn't.

Yep.

It was loud too.

You know what, though?

If that's what it takes

to lower your blood pressure, then so be it.

You know,

looking at all those poses

got me thinking about

a couple yoga poses

that might relieve some stress for both of us.

Oh! Nick.

You need to focus your energy on getting better.

After the doctor gives you the thumbs-up,

then we'll talk.

Oh, come on, baby.

No. At least not anytime soon.

Oh!

Here.

Oh, not this again.

Yes, this again.

And just know, if you wanna show me

some of them poses you're thinking about,

you need to drink that.Mmm.

What you know about that dolphin pose, girl?

Hmm?

Baby,

are you sure this is fruit?

It just tastes like different colors of dirt.

The grass tastes better than the fruit.

Ahh.

Sorry you couldn't have none of these pancakes, man,

'cause they were off the chain.

Hello.

Hey, Ma. Hey, Marilyn.

Hey, so don't you guys forget about our big race later on today.

We got a lot of money on the line.

We, won't.We, won't.

Uh...

Do I even wanna know? Nope.

Just know that if Lindsey's crying later on today,

it's not 'cause I punched her in the face.

Be good.

Bye, guys. NICK: All right, guys, see you.

So, how you feeling, sweetie?

You know,

actually, I'm feeling a whole lot better.

Do I still have to eat this?

Yes.

And since you're feeling a whole lot better,

maybe it's time we check your blood pressure again.

Again? Baby, come on, just calm down.

Stick it out.

Mmm-hmm.

Okay, this can't be right.

What is it? It's time to call the doctor again.

His blood pressure is even higher.

It's 'cause I'm stressed out from eating dirt.

You kill my son,

we gonna have a problem.

Mommy, Mommy.

Oh, ooh...

Would you stop screaming?

- Watch out, baby! - Watch out!

What? How'd you not hit that?

What is wrong with you, man?

Hit the nitro! Hit the nitro!

Yes!

Winner! Winning.

Hoo-hoo.

Where's my money?

Did you just say something? 'Cause I can't hear you.

You heard me. Where's my money?

You know, take your money,

and use it to fix your face.

Okay. Bye.

Sore loser.

So bitter. So bitter.

Well, Nick.

Your blood pressure is just fine.

Wait. Doc, how is that possible?

I checked it. It was high

just this morning.

Really? You use this?

Yeah, I got it at a drugstore.

Oh, I see the problem.

Your display lights are faulty.

You're not getting an accurate reading.

Let me show you something here.

According to your monitor,

this candle has stage two high blood pressure.

You're kidding me.

So, all this time, he's been fine?

Yeah, probably.

Look, uh,

going to a doctor causes some people stress,

so, getting your blood pressure checked

can sometimes raise your blood pressure.

But Nick, he's fine.

Listen, since I'm here, do you mind if I check your pressure?

Oh, yeah, sure.

I mean, I'm sure I'm fine. You know,

I eat pretty healthy and I exercise.

Well, exercise is good.

It's all good.

Okay, and...

Actually...

It's high.

How high?

Well, not as high as the candle,

but I'm gonna tell you the same thing I told Nick.

Just relax,

take it easy, and, uh,

I'll see you in a week or so.

So, by "relax," you mean...

I mean, just take it easy.

Anything that you can think of

that will put your mind at ease, just do that.

Maybe it's time that we practice

some of those poses

I was telling you about.

You know, honey,

that is a great idea.

And I know just the place to do it.

The bed-and-breakfast?

Oh, come... Seriously?

Doctor's orders.

Come on, baby...

Beat it.

Nick.

You know where the door is.

Hey, would you put that over there for me?

Hey, what's all this stuff?

Well, we saw it at the mall,

and Marilyn thought we should try it.

Yeah, it's called Karaoke Dreams.

You pick a song from your favorite group,

and then you score points for every part you get right.

Actually,

it was the only game we could find

that I figured wouldn't wear me out.

So, where you guys going, anyway?

Oh, Lake Stevens.

There is this beautiful bed-and-breakfast there.

Oh, Lord, I can't stand those places.

They creep me out.

Sweetheart, I'm ready to go.

Are you?

Really? That's what you're wearing?

If you can't beat 'em...

Marilyn, we left all the information on the refrigerator.

Girl, I got it. This ain't the first time

you unloaded your kids on me.

Just go. Enjoy yourself.

Thank you. We'll be fine.

Bye, guys. Bye!

All right, toodle-oo, children. Mom.

Nick, be quiet.

So, you guys ready?

Yeah.

Yeah, what song do you wanna do?

Ooh, let's do that one.

Katy Perry. I Kissed a Girl.

I'm not singing that. What else you got?

Uh, okay.

How about that one?

All-American Rejects.

Gives You Hell?

What kind of music are y'all listening to?

It's a decent song.

Oh, please, give me this.

Oh, okay. See, here we go.

I like this one.

Who is this?

Don't worry about it, baby. Just follow my lead.

♪ They say I'm crazy

♪ I really don't care

♪ That's my prerogative

♪ They say I'm nasty

♪ But I don't give a damn

♪ Gettin' mine is how I live

Drop it like it's hot!