Original subtitles

Okay, when I'm finished,

I need you guys to tell me what you think, and be honest.

People say they want you to be honest,

then when you're honest, they get mad.

Nick.

Kevin, are you ready?

Yeah, I finally cropped out your face.

Hi, my name is Lindsey Kingston-Persons.

I'm from Seattle, Washington,

and I'd love to be in P-Nut's new music video.

Now, who is P-Nut, again?

Babe, you remember.

He's the cute little rapper on Ellen.

Oh, that was real?

Thought it was CGI or something.

Yes, he's real. Now, can I dance, now?

Yeah, I'm sorry, baby. You go for it.

Hi, I'm Lindsey Kingston-Persons.

I'm from Seattle, Washington,

How many girls are they choosing, babe?

From the audition video? I don't know.

But the three best get to dance in his music video.

Well, all right. Okay, honey. Go ahead.

Wait, wait, wait.

Before I start this camcorder,

do you have any more questions?

We're good.Yeah.

Oh, wait, wait, wait. No, no! I saw that move on the Rihanna video.

No, no. Wait, watch this. Watch this.

Look, you're not doing it quite right.

Put a little more hip into it.

Nick!

Aren't you a little old to be watching Rihanna videos?

Uh, I wasn't watching it. I saw it.

There's a difference.

Kevin had it on.

Say what?

Oh, come on. All you guys know I do not like Rihanna, okay?

Then why were you watching her?

Hello, guys, I'm trying to dance here.

Oh, sorry, honey.

Oh, my gosh! Oh, okay, wait now.

Now that reminds me of the prep, right?

But the prep, 'scuse me honey, okay, the prep went like this.

Mom, can I just...

Yeah!

You takin' it back!

Right, right?

What is this? Bringing back ancient history?

Watch some grown folk do that move, all right?

Now, you need to add a little bit of this to it. Oh, I like this.

And then you put the neck into it like that...

Okay, they're gonna be doing this for awhile. You want to take this upstairs?

Yes.

♪ Are we there yet?

♪ Tell me, tell me, tell me

♪ Tell me, are we there yet?

♪ Are we there yet?

Okay, honey. I'm off.

Okay, baby.

What's going on?

I made the cut.

I'm going to audition for the new P-Nut music video!

All right, congratulations. SUZANNE: Honey!

So, what's next?

Well, the first practice is tomorrow. Will you take me?

More importantly, can you leave her?

All right, you guys work it out.

Congratulations, sweetheart.

Thanks, Mom!

All right, bye, guys. See you later.

Whoo!

Morning. Morning. Thank you.

Hello.

Going to a funeral?

No,

remember that little Mexican bar around the corner from No-Hitter?

The one with the waitress you like?

That's the one. They closed.

What? Yeah, I stopped by there last night.

Bars up, lights off.

So, what does this have to do with you?

I am going to buy it.

A bar? Yeah.

With alcohol? Yeah.

And women?

It's always been my dream to own a bar.

You never told me that.

In fact, that might be the only dream you haven't told me about.

Speaking of which, crazy one last night.

Me, Cameron Diaz, the white Atlanta housewife,

and a constitutional amendment banning underwear.

Hey, hey, hey, hey. Kid in the room.

No, no. I want to hear this.

So, you're serious about this?

Yeah, I'm going by the bank this afternoon to work out a loan.

So, if you're gonna buy a bar,

can I be the busboy?

Why in the world would you want to be a busboy?

Because I want it to be part of my story.

I mean, when I become famous, I want people to say I started out as a busboy.

Who did that?

Jon Stewart, Johnny Depp, Martin Luther King.

I did not know that.

See? Good story, right?

I'll tell you what.

Why don't you practice being a busboy around here,

and we'll see if you're any good.

Okay.

Hey, um, I'm not done.

That's not bad.

Yeah, yeah, that's what I said, son.

'Cause I don't chase 'em, I replace 'em.

Oh, Shadon!

Hey, you bringin' the Black Label tonight, right?

Oh, you stupid, son.

You stupid!

He's stupid. You stupid, son.

Look, I'm working, a'ight? I gotta holler back at you, a'ight?

You stupid.

All right, let me just bring up your information here.

See what we got.

Well, it all looks pretty good.

Oh, I'm sorry. Oh, I got to take this.

What's up, girl?

Yeah. Yo, yo, yo. Slow down. What happened? What happened?

Come on, Rakija, what I want with Tamika?

No, no... Who said I was gonna be there?

Yeah, well, your girl be hatin', yo.

No, no, no, no.

You know I love you, girl.

You a fool, girl.

Rakija, you a fool. Quit it.

'Cause I'm at work, yo.

Rakija, you a fool.

I'm so sorry. That was just...

Rakija. Yeah. She's a fool.

Hmm, yeah.

All right. Let's see here.

Oh, good news, Martin. It looks like you were approved.

All we need is 20% down.

Twenty percent? I only have ten.

Oh, I'm sorry. Just let me get this for a second.

Loan manager.

Dre, what you doing, yo? You don't call me on this line unless it's an emergency.

You know that. What?

She did? No, no, no. I just hung up on her a minute...

No... A'ight. A'ight. A'ight. Five minutes.

Yeah, five minutes. I'll call... I'll hit you back, a'ight?

'Ey, and Dre, good looking out. A'ight.

Look, the original deal on this loan was for ten percent down.

Look, look, playa, I don't know what to tell you, all right?

You come up with the 20%, we got this.

If not, it is what it is.

Look, look, look. A'ight, he's your boy, all right.

Why don't you go in together?

The business plan is solid. Y'all are tight. Work it out.

Now, check it, playa, I got to take this.

What's up, girl?

No, no, no, no. No, no, no. Come on.

No, don't say that.

You know, he's right. I mean,

the business plan is solid, and we are in fact tight.

Dude, I can't do something like this without talking to Suzanne.

I'm not asking you to.

Running a bar is a lot of work, man.

I mean, we already have four jobs.

Four? Two jobs, two kids.

You wouldn't need to do a thing. This would be as silent partners.

All I need is your money.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, girl. I swear I ain't playin wit' ya.

No, no, he's right here. Yeah, yeah. Hold up.

Yo, you Shadon.

Hi, honey.

Hey, baby.

What do you want?

What, "What do you want?"

I can't say hi to my baby

after a long day at work?

Mmm-hmm. You could, if that's what you were doing.

So, what do you want?

Okay, sit down.Mmm-hmm.

Is this a confession?

No. It's a discussion, all right?

You know that Mexican bar that closed down?

No.

Okay, there was this Mexican bar...

It closed. I heard.

Right. Well,

Martin wants to buy it.

Oh, cool. Good for him.

All right, but here's the thing, all right?

He was approved for the loan, but he needs another ten percent down.

Oh, what's he gonna do?

That's the discussion, see?

He wants us to partner with him.

You're joking.

Yeah, see, I told him you probably wouldn't want to do it.

No, no, honey, I do.

This is great. I've always dreamed of owning a bar.

Since when does everybody start dreaming about owning stuff?

I just dreamed about winning the Super Bowl.

Like that's easier?

Hi, Martin.Hi.

Or should I say, partner?

Partner? Really? You're in?

I'm in! MARTIN: All right!

Oh, my gosh. This is gonna be so great.

Yeah. Wow!

I have so many ideas. Oh, we could make it, like, a martini bar

with a retro '60s feel,

and lounge chairs and mood lighting.

Oh, my gosh! I can have events there!

This is such a win-win!

Oh, I'm gonna go write stuff down. Okay.

So, obviously you mentioned the partner portion of the deal.

Did you happen to get to the silent part?

I was getting to it.

Dancers,

I'm Laurieann Gibson, your choreographer.

And let me introduce you to the young man who brought us all together.

Shall I? P-Nut, come on out.

Hello, ladies. Thank you for auditioning for my video.

I want you to remember,

if you do your best,

you might be the one for me.

Peace!

Yeah.

Well, I'm gonna take you through these eight counts, ladies.

Let's go, line it up.

Ladies in the back row,

thank you for coming.

If you're not gonna put yourself in the front,

then why should I?

Grab your bag.

Arrivederci.

Bye-bye.

I'm gonna take you through these eight counts.

Watch and learn.

Boom-kack! Boom-kack! Boom-kack! Boom-kack!

Boom! Kack! Boom-kack!

Music!

Come on, hot stuff. Gimme a smile.

Yes. Yes. What's your name, pretty?

Lindsey.

Well, Lindsey, your feet look glued to the ground.

Pick 'em up!

Pick 'em up, Lindsey!

Lindsey!

That was horrible.

Well, you had most of it.

Most of it isn't good enough.

She moved so fast, all that booming and kacking.

I was paying pretty close attention. Look, come on.

I'll help you out. I'll help you get some of this.

Seriously? Yeah. Come on.

Let's go, Lindsey!

Five, six, seven, eight!

Boom-kack! Boom-boom!

Boom-boom! Kack-kack-kack! Boom!

Boom! Kack! Boom-kack!

Boom!

Come on, Lindsey!

Eye of the tiger!

Let's go!

Boom-kack!

Thanks for coming by, Carver.

Eh, no problem.

I have to inspect the building sooner or later, hence the title,

"Building Inspector."

Hi, Martin.

Ah, Suzanne, this is Carver. Carver, this is...

I don't care.

You want me to inspect the building or meet people?

You want me to meet people,

I can come back when the bar is open,

and you can have someone else inspect the building.

Come, come, come.

Now, I think that it should be dimly lit,

but not too dim where people can't see.

And, of course, we have to get rid of this mural.

Oh, oh, my gosh. And I had the best

leek appetizer the other day. Delicious!

So good. And then...

Hi.

Lindsey, right? LINDSEY: Yeah.

You probably heard me getting yelled at by Laurieann.

Hmm, that happens.

My dance teacher is just like that,

but crazy.

So, uh, where do you train?

I don't.

I thought this contest was for people who submitted their video.

Seriously?

I thought she got rid of all those girls on day one.

You really got this from a video audition?

Yeah. How did you get it?

My agent told me about it.

Hello, ladies.

Up you get. Let's go.

Now, before we begin, does anyone have any questions?

I have a question for you.

How old are you?

Thirty? Thirty-one?

He's nine years old.

I'm gonna need you to wrap it up.

Better yet, come back to my Johnny Gill audition.

Ladies, tomorrow you will be performing for the judges,

so please bring it,

'cause you can't go home and get it.

Music.

Ladies, ladies, ladies.

Pay attention over here, please.

Everyone watching Lindsey,

'cause this is what you shouldn't do.

Ever.

Ever!

Let's go! From the top.

Hi, sweetheart. How was practice?

Horrible.

Oh, don't worry, baby. You'll get it.

No, I won't.

Lindsey, how do you know that?

Because I'm quitting.

What?

I thought you wanted this.

I did, until I got there.

I thought this whole thing was gonna be fun,

but all the other girls, they're, like, super professional.

They even have agents.

Well, sweetheart, just because they have agents

doesn't mean that they're better than you.

Yeah, it kind of does.

Lindsey, you beat out a ton of girls for this spot,

and now you right there next to the girls with the agents.

Why would you quit now?

Because no matter how hard I try,

every time I need to boom-kack-boom,

I always kack-boom-kack.

And then Laurieann gets all up in my face, screaming,

"Boom-kack-boom, Lindsey. Boom-kack-boom."

And then I get all nervous,

and I start kack-kack-boom, and then a boom-boom-kack.

I thought this was gonna be fun, but now I hate it. Okay?

Lindsey.

Hey.

You need to do something about your wife.

Why? What did she do?

Hey, man, I wasn't through.

Man, we need this table!

Look, remember when you agreed that if you and Suzanne gave me this loan,

you would be silent partners because, I quote,

"Running a bar is a lot of work, man.

"We already got four jobs."

Number one, I don't sound anything like that.

And two, I haven't had a chance to explain to her that she's a silent partner.

Well, get a chance.

Because she needs to be stopped.

Oh, babe.

What do you think of this idea as a uniform?

Hey, I don't know.

You don't like it?

Babe, we need to talk.

Why? What did you do?

How come every time I say we need to talk,

you always think I did something?

Well, I know I didn't do nothing.

Yeah, you kind of did.

Really? What?

Well, you know about the bar thing, right?

How that's Martin's baby?

Yeah. It's ten percent our baby, too.

Yeah, well, when he asked about the loan,

I told him we didn't have time to run a bar.

He said that was cool, that we would just be silent partners.

So, he's willing to take our money, but he doesn't want to know what we think?

Yep. That's the definition of silent partner.

See, this is why every time you say we need to talk,

I think you did something wrong.

You're the one that agreed to being a silent partner, not me.

And if he thinks I'm not supposed to be talking,

that's your fault. You didn't tell me that.

I tried to tell you,

but you were so busy not being silent, you wouldn't listen.

You know what, Nick?

If you want to keep silent, you keep silent.

But we gave him ten percent, and half of that is mine,

so if he wants me to pay, I need to have some say.

Baby, look, what am I supposed to tell Martin?

I don't know.

You the one that wanted to be a silent partner.

Be silent.

Thank you for coming and supporting.

I want to welcome the judges,

the parents,

and, finally, the ladies.

I wish I could work with you all.

Good luck.

Oh, he's so cute!

Ladies, you have worked hard, and you should be proud.

And although one of you is leaving tonight, know that

it's only because you're not as good as the other girls.

From the top.

♪ You might be the one for me

♪ You might be the one for me

Judges.

Would Kennedy and Rachel please step forward?

Congratulations, ladies.

Would Cashmere and Lindsey please step forward?

Cashmere,

now, your body looked like it was having so much fun.

Next time, please try inviting your face along.

And Lindsey,

your feet and your hands,

the judges and I agree,

they were not together.

They were not on point.

Boo!

What is wrong with you, man?

The point, your hands and feet.

But I understand that you both have heart,

and you proved that today, but there can only be one loser.

That woman is crazy.

Sorry, Lindsey.

Congratulations, Cashmere! Me? Oh, my God.

Yes, darling. Oh!

Hey, Lindsey, why don't you do your last boom-kack?

Hey, why don't you shut up for eight counts?

Gosh, I mean, you were working those moves, girl.

Thanks, Gigi.

They should have picked you.

But sometimes people don't recognize the talent in the room.

And it reminds me of when I was almost in a music video.

Y'all remember Mr. Telephone Man, right?

I was supposed to be the little girl sitting on the stoop.

Gigi? Yeah?

Not about you.

We're just glad you went out there and did your best.

Thanks. And I suppose if I had some real training

like those other girls, I could have even won.

Hey, Kev,

what's up with these plates, man?

I thought you were working on being a busboy.

Ah, nah, I'm over that.

So many people already have that story. I want a different story.

You know, I was thinking...

maybe a tollbooth collector, hmm?

Those guys have cool vests.

Hey, guys. You know what? It's kind of a coincidence you called

because I was gonna come over, anyway.

Well, we invited you over...

I have something to tell you.Nope.

I have something to tell you guys first.

Nick, Suzanne,

I want to thank you guys for your generous offer to help me out with the bar,

but I can't take your money.

Really? Listen, man, we're friends.

If we went into business together,

it's only a matter of time before the money came between us.

So, I went to the bank and I told them I was pulling out.

So, you're not gonna buy the bar?

No, I am.

When I decided to bail,

they decided that they'd rather sell than hold onto the property,

so they lowered the down payment and now it's a done deal.

I have my bar, and I have my friends.

And you have the recipient of your first free drink.

Hey, P-Nut,

Laurieann. Come on in.

Hi, how are you? Hi.

Hmm. What are you doing here?

Came to kick our daughter out the house?

Uh, well actually, we've come to offer her

a small part in the video.

Not dancing, but, uh, something significant.

Oh, um, so, what would I do?

You'd play my girlfriend.

What's so funny?

You're nine.

Age ain't nothin' but a number.

That number is nine.

I'll do it.

No, I'm cool.

Parents, listen.

I know that I've been hard on Lindsey, and I do apologize,

but it's because she has talent.

Have you ever thought of getting her dance classes?

Would you be the teacher?

Yeah.

Nope.

Boom-kack!