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1
00:00:02,393 --> 00:00:03,916
[LAUGHS]
2
00:00:05,222 --> 00:00:07,050
TROY: Did you get
the link I sent you?
3
00:00:07,094 --> 00:00:09,444
You've got to see this.
It's hilarious.
4
00:00:09,487 --> 00:00:10,706
Yeah, it's still loading.
5
00:00:10,749 --> 00:00:12,490
Okay, go ahead, Troy,
and make a muscle.
6
00:00:12,534 --> 00:00:14,579
All right.
Check out these guns.
7
00:00:17,060 --> 00:00:20,716
Those aren't muscles.
These are muscles.
8
00:00:23,632 --> 00:00:26,026
NICK: Kevin. Kevin,
it's time for breakfast.
9
00:00:26,069 --> 00:00:27,070
Hey, Dad.
10
00:00:28,506 --> 00:00:30,247
What are you doing, boy?
11
00:00:30,291 --> 00:00:32,162
I'm showing Troy
my muscles.
12
00:00:32,206 --> 00:00:33,250
Those aren't muscles.
13
00:00:34,904 --> 00:00:36,340
These are muscles.
14
00:00:36,384 --> 00:00:38,168
Wow!TROY: Wow!
15
00:00:38,212 --> 00:00:40,301
My whole screen went black.
16
00:00:40,344 --> 00:00:42,042
It's like a bicep eclipse.
17
00:00:43,608 --> 00:00:45,088
Kevin's gotta go
eat breakfast.
18
00:00:45,132 --> 00:00:46,307
He'll see you later, Troy.
19
00:00:46,350 --> 00:00:48,396
Bye, Mr. Kingston-Persons.
20
00:00:48,439 --> 00:00:49,875
I'll catch you later.
21
00:00:53,140 --> 00:00:54,967
Kevin?
22
00:00:55,011 --> 00:00:57,535
Kevin, do you have
my lotion in here again?
23
00:00:57,579 --> 00:00:59,233
[BABY GOT BACKPLAYING]
24
00:00:59,276 --> 00:01:00,408
♪ It's like, out there
25
00:01:00,451 --> 00:01:03,063
♪ I mean, gross
Look!
26
00:01:03,106 --> 00:01:06,196
Boy, You're supposed to use it
to make your skin soft.
27
00:01:06,240 --> 00:01:08,546
♪ I like big butts
And I cannot lieHey.
28
00:01:08,590 --> 00:01:10,461
♪ You other brothers can't deny
29
00:01:10,505 --> 00:01:12,594
♪ When a girl walks in
With an itty bitty waist
30
00:01:12,637 --> 00:01:14,117
♪ And a round thing
In your face
31
00:01:14,161 --> 00:01:16,380
♪ You get sprung
Wanna pull up tough
32
00:01:16,424 --> 00:01:18,034
♪ 'Cause you notice
That butt was stuffed
33
00:01:18,078 --> 00:01:20,080
♪ Deep in the jeans
She's wearing
34
00:01:20,123 --> 00:01:22,125
♪ I'm hooked
And I can't stop staring
35
00:01:22,169 --> 00:01:25,520
♪ Oh baby, I wanna get with you
And take your picture
36
00:01:25,563 --> 00:01:27,391
♪ My homeboys
Tried to warn me
37
00:01:27,435 --> 00:01:29,611
♪ But that butt you got
Makes me so horny
38
00:01:29,654 --> 00:01:31,265
♪ Ooh, rump-o'-smooth-skin
39
00:01:31,308 --> 00:01:33,093
♪ You say you wanna
Get in my Benz?
40
00:01:33,136 --> 00:01:34,964
♪ Well, use me, use me
41
00:01:35,007 --> 00:01:37,184
♪ 'Cause you ain't
That average groupie
42
00:01:37,227 --> 00:01:38,968
♪ I've seen them dancin'
43
00:01:39,011 --> 00:01:40,709
♪ To hell with romancin'
44
00:01:40,752 --> 00:01:42,624
♪ She's sweat, wet
45
00:01:42,667 --> 00:01:44,321
♪ Got it goin'
Like a turbo 'Vette
46
00:01:44,365 --> 00:01:47,150
♪ I'm tired of magazines
Sayin' flat butts
Are the thing...
47
00:01:51,067 --> 00:01:52,460
♪ Baby got back!
48
00:01:52,503 --> 00:01:55,593
♪ Are we there yet?
49
00:01:55,637 --> 00:01:58,727
♪ Tell me, tell me, tell me
50
00:01:58,770 --> 00:02:00,729
♪ Tell me, are we there yet?
51
00:02:00,772 --> 00:02:02,470
♪ Are we there yet?
52
00:02:03,253 --> 00:02:04,994
[TV PLAYING]
53
00:02:05,647 --> 00:02:07,083
Dinner's almost ready.
54
00:02:07,127 --> 00:02:08,519
What are you making?
55
00:02:08,563 --> 00:02:10,217
Mom's teaching me
how to make
peppered salmon.
56
00:02:10,260 --> 00:02:11,653
Awesome!
57
00:02:11,696 --> 00:02:13,394
Peppered salmon is awesome?KEVIN: No.
58
00:02:13,437 --> 00:02:15,309
I just pulled up
this viral video.
59
00:02:15,352 --> 00:02:17,267
It's an old lady dancing
to Baby Got Back.
60
00:02:17,311 --> 00:02:18,964
[ALL LAUGHING]
61
00:02:19,008 --> 00:02:20,488
I love dancing
to that song.
62
00:02:20,531 --> 00:02:22,533
But who would
record it and put it
on the Internet?
63
00:02:23,578 --> 00:02:25,101
[NICK LAUGHS]
64
00:02:26,276 --> 00:02:27,625
Look at this fool.
65
00:02:27,669 --> 00:02:31,194
She is a mess.
Got no make-up on,
66
00:02:31,238 --> 00:02:32,891
lookin' like a ghetto
Lady Gaga.
67
00:02:32,935 --> 00:02:35,067
[LAUGHTER]
68
00:02:37,679 --> 00:02:39,071
Hey, that looks
like your room.
69
00:02:41,683 --> 00:02:43,424
Baby, those look
like your pajamas.
70
00:02:43,467 --> 00:02:45,077
What?
71
00:02:45,121 --> 00:02:47,471
Mom, that looks like...
72
00:02:47,515 --> 00:02:50,213
Oh, my God,
oh, my God,
oh, my God!
73
00:02:51,475 --> 00:02:53,347
ALL: Oh, my God!
74
00:03:07,099 --> 00:03:08,492
This is horrible.
75
00:03:08,536 --> 00:03:09,885
I think it's hilarious.
76
00:03:09,928 --> 00:03:11,147
Turn that off.
77
00:03:11,191 --> 00:03:13,584
I didn't know you could
dance like that, Mom.
78
00:03:13,628 --> 00:03:15,934
You weren't supposed
to find out on the Internet.
79
00:03:15,978 --> 00:03:17,327
It's no big deal.
80
00:03:17,371 --> 00:03:19,416
Cats are put online
all the time.
81
00:03:19,460 --> 00:03:20,852
And it doesn't seem
to bother them,
82
00:03:20,896 --> 00:03:22,637
because they
keep doing stuff
that's hilarious.
83
00:03:22,680 --> 00:03:24,160
Your ever see
surprise kitty?
84
00:03:30,775 --> 00:03:33,125
I am not a cat!
85
00:03:33,169 --> 00:03:35,737
I'm a wife,
and a working woman
and a mother.
86
00:03:35,780 --> 00:03:37,129
And I'm not hilarious.
87
00:03:37,173 --> 00:03:40,394
How did this video
even get on there?
88
00:03:40,437 --> 00:03:41,960
Did you record your mother
without her knowing it?
89
00:03:42,004 --> 00:03:43,353
Ew. No.
90
00:03:43,397 --> 00:03:45,050
Did you leave
your webcam running?
91
00:03:45,094 --> 00:03:48,010
I don't know. Maybe.
92
00:03:48,663 --> 00:03:50,186
Probably.
93
00:03:50,230 --> 00:03:52,928
I guess. Yeah.
94
00:03:52,971 --> 00:03:55,452
Man, I told you.
You gotta be careful
about that.
95
00:03:55,496 --> 00:03:57,976
You leave
your webcam running,
people can capture video
96
00:03:58,020 --> 00:04:00,501
on what they see
from your computer,
whether you're there or not.
97
00:04:00,544 --> 00:04:03,547
[SIGHS] I can't believe
this happened.
98
00:04:03,591 --> 00:04:07,290
I'm on the Internet
in my drawers doing
the big butt dance!
99
00:04:08,204 --> 00:04:09,945
It could be worse.How?
100
00:04:09,988 --> 00:04:12,252
You could've been dancing
to Ice Ice Baby.
101
00:04:14,123 --> 00:04:15,559
♪ Ice ice baby
102
00:04:20,651 --> 00:04:22,349
SUZANNE: Nick!Baby... [SIGHS]
103
00:04:23,915 --> 00:04:25,177
What's she so upset about?
104
00:04:25,221 --> 00:04:26,831
I mean, it's not like
it's a sex tape.
105
00:04:28,398 --> 00:04:30,182
What is wrong
with you, man?
106
00:04:39,191 --> 00:04:42,064
So, explain to me again
why I'm here?
107
00:04:42,107 --> 00:04:43,805
We're having a little
family emergency.
108
00:04:43,848 --> 00:04:45,720
Ooh, do I smell
a divorce?
109
00:04:45,763 --> 00:04:47,722
No, Ma.
110
00:04:47,765 --> 00:04:50,246
I need you to help Lindsey
finish making dinner
while I deal with Suzanne.
111
00:04:50,290 --> 00:04:53,162
I thought you
invited me over here
to eat dinner, not make it.
112
00:04:53,205 --> 00:04:54,946
If I'd have told you
that Suzanne and I
were having a problem,
113
00:04:54,990 --> 00:04:55,991
would you have come?
114
00:04:56,818 --> 00:04:58,472
No.All right, then.
115
00:04:58,515 --> 00:05:00,256
So, what's wrong with her?
116
00:05:00,300 --> 00:05:02,084
I mean, other
than the obvious?
117
00:05:02,650 --> 00:05:04,347
It's a long story.
118
00:05:04,391 --> 00:05:06,654
Well, it better be over
by 10:30.
119
00:05:06,697 --> 00:05:08,264
Mama got a hot date.
120
00:05:08,308 --> 00:05:10,832
Hot! Hot, honey,
I tell you, hot!
121
00:05:10,875 --> 00:05:12,616
Ma.What?
122
00:05:13,922 --> 00:05:15,445
How do you think
you got here?
123
00:05:21,103 --> 00:05:23,453
I just feel
so violated,
you know?
124
00:05:23,497 --> 00:05:25,760
It's like I was spied on
in my own house.
125
00:05:25,803 --> 00:05:28,197
What else can record me
without my knowing it?
126
00:05:28,240 --> 00:05:32,419
Well, technically, anything
that can receive a signal
can transmit a signal.
127
00:05:32,462 --> 00:05:36,379
So, the TV, the telephone,
the radio, headphones...
128
00:05:36,423 --> 00:05:37,989
[SIGHS] You're not helping.
129
00:05:38,033 --> 00:05:39,817
I'm just trying
to answer your question.
130
00:05:39,861 --> 00:05:42,603
Okay, Nick,
you're an IT guy.
This is your world.
131
00:05:42,646 --> 00:05:45,693
Isn't there some way
to get the video
off the Internet?
132
00:05:45,736 --> 00:05:49,261
Well, unfortunately, once
something's up on the Web,
it's there for good.
133
00:05:49,305 --> 00:05:51,525
[SIGHS]But don't worry about it.
134
00:05:51,568 --> 00:05:54,005
This'll go away.
You're not Kim Kardashian.
135
00:05:54,049 --> 00:05:57,313
This week, it's you.
Next week, it'll be
a cat in a fishbowl.
136
00:05:59,402 --> 00:06:01,186
What is up
with you and cats?
137
00:06:01,230 --> 00:06:02,623
Cats are funny.
138
00:06:03,667 --> 00:06:05,495
Look, you can't even
tell it's you.
139
00:06:06,191 --> 00:06:07,236
Really?
140
00:06:07,279 --> 00:06:08,933
Really.
141
00:06:08,977 --> 00:06:10,457
Why do you think I hate it
when you come to bed
looking like that?
142
00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:24,384
No, you don't
understand.
143
00:06:24,427 --> 00:06:26,560
I didn't put it
on the Internet.
144
00:06:26,603 --> 00:06:27,952
Hello? Hello?
145
00:06:28,518 --> 00:06:30,215
Who's that?
146
00:06:30,259 --> 00:06:33,088
I just had another
client cancel because
they saw the video.
147
00:06:35,917 --> 00:06:38,572
Mom! What are you doing
with my computer?
148
00:06:38,615 --> 00:06:39,921
It's my computer
149
00:06:39,964 --> 00:06:42,140
until you learn what
that thing is capable of.
150
00:06:42,184 --> 00:06:43,707
I know what
it's capable of.
151
00:06:43,751 --> 00:06:45,492
That's why I don't
want you to take it.
152
00:06:45,535 --> 00:06:47,755
How am I supposed
to communicate
with my friends?
153
00:06:47,798 --> 00:06:49,409
Talk to them.How?
154
00:06:49,452 --> 00:06:50,714
Face to face.
155
00:06:50,758 --> 00:06:52,455
Like an old person?
156
00:06:52,499 --> 00:06:55,371
You know, Suzanne, I don't think
the video's that big a deal.
157
00:06:55,415 --> 00:06:57,504
I mean, it's not like
it's a sex tape.
158
00:06:57,547 --> 00:06:58,896
Although, it'd be better
for you if it were,
159
00:06:58,940 --> 00:07:00,768
because I guarantee
nobody would
wanna see that.
160
00:07:00,811 --> 00:07:02,291
Aren't you supposed
to be eating?
161
00:07:02,334 --> 00:07:05,294
I would, if I had
some real food.
162
00:07:05,337 --> 00:07:06,687
You don't like
peppered salmon?
163
00:07:06,730 --> 00:07:07,949
It's Mom's specialty.
164
00:07:07,992 --> 00:07:09,951
Specialty, huh?
165
00:07:09,994 --> 00:07:12,649
Lindsey, you need to learn
how to cook some real food,
166
00:07:12,693 --> 00:07:15,435
because you're not
gonna get a man
cooking like this.
167
00:07:15,478 --> 00:07:17,611
I got a man
cooking like this.
168
00:07:17,654 --> 00:07:19,743
Baby, believe me,
it was not your cooking.
169
00:07:19,787 --> 00:07:21,179
Maybe it was your dancing.
170
00:07:22,790 --> 00:07:25,488
I want a man to like me
for my mind and personality,
171
00:07:25,532 --> 00:07:27,229
not how I look
or how I cook.
172
00:07:27,272 --> 00:07:30,537
I had one of those once.
It gets old, fast. Trust me.
173
00:07:30,580 --> 00:07:32,452
Maybe that's not what got old.
174
00:07:32,495 --> 00:07:34,366
You guys gonna eat,
or are ya gonna fight?
175
00:07:34,410 --> 00:07:38,414
All I'm saying is, I need
to teach Lindsey how to cook
some real soul food.
176
00:07:38,458 --> 00:07:39,937
What's "soul food"?
177
00:07:39,981 --> 00:07:42,766
The number two
cause of death
in black men over 40.
178
00:07:42,810 --> 00:07:44,115
What's the number one cause?
179
00:07:44,159 --> 00:07:46,466
Stress.
Now, eat.
Please.
180
00:07:52,559 --> 00:07:56,388
Butter, butter, lard.
181
00:07:58,042 --> 00:07:59,391
Chicken.
182
00:07:59,435 --> 00:08:01,045
What is wrong
with this thing?
183
00:08:01,089 --> 00:08:03,091
It looks disgusting.
184
00:08:03,134 --> 00:08:05,528
What is all this stuff
wrapped around it?
185
00:08:05,572 --> 00:08:07,356
That's called the skin.
186
00:08:07,922 --> 00:08:09,314
Ew!
187
00:08:09,358 --> 00:08:11,882
No. You mean... mmm.
188
00:08:11,926 --> 00:08:15,233
You see, the skin is what gives
the chicken the flavor.
189
00:08:15,277 --> 00:08:17,497
Is this an organic,
free-range chicken?
190
00:08:17,540 --> 00:08:20,500
No. It's a flavorful,
hard-knock-life chicken.
191
00:08:20,543 --> 00:08:22,893
If that chicken
was a rapper,
he'd be Tupac.
192
00:08:24,547 --> 00:08:26,680
Ooh! What do we need
vodka for?
193
00:08:26,723 --> 00:08:29,334
I'll give you a hint,
it's not for the chicken.
194
00:08:35,166 --> 00:08:37,429
Mom! Mom!
195
00:08:44,306 --> 00:08:46,787
Kevin, why do you
have your computer
196
00:08:46,830 --> 00:08:48,179
when I took it
away from you?
197
00:08:48,223 --> 00:08:50,834
I thought
my punishment was over.Nuh-uh.
198
00:08:50,878 --> 00:08:52,532
I was just gonna
watch a video.
199
00:08:52,575 --> 00:08:53,968
Were you gonna
watch the video,
200
00:08:54,011 --> 00:08:56,666
or was the video
going to watch you?
201
00:08:56,710 --> 00:08:58,494
Go put that computer
up in my bedroom.
202
00:08:58,538 --> 00:09:01,279
And I don't wanna see it
back in your hands
until I put it there.
203
00:09:01,802 --> 00:09:03,064
Yes, ma'am.
204
00:09:05,457 --> 00:09:06,763
[DOORBELL RINGS]
205
00:09:09,940 --> 00:09:11,681
Hi, Mrs. Kingston-Persons.
206
00:09:11,725 --> 00:09:14,771
Hi, Troy.
Hi, Jackie.
Come on in.
207
00:09:14,815 --> 00:09:16,817
Suzanne, can I talk to you
for a moment?
208
00:09:16,860 --> 00:09:18,601
Sure.
209
00:09:18,645 --> 00:09:21,386
Suzanne, you need to be more
responsible with your child.
210
00:09:22,649 --> 00:09:24,259
What are you talking about?
211
00:09:24,302 --> 00:09:27,610
Well, Troy was recording
his web chat with Kevin
the other day,
212
00:09:27,654 --> 00:09:29,438
and the next thing he knows,
you're in the room,
213
00:09:29,481 --> 00:09:31,048
dancing around
like Tila Tequila.
214
00:09:32,702 --> 00:09:34,574
I was shocked.
215
00:09:34,617 --> 00:09:37,011
Wait a minute.
Troy did this?
216
00:09:37,054 --> 00:09:41,189
And you're upset with me
because he recorded me
in the privacy of my own home?
217
00:09:41,232 --> 00:09:42,712
He wouldn't have had
anything to record
218
00:09:42,756 --> 00:09:44,975
if you were a little
more responsible.
219
00:09:45,019 --> 00:09:49,110
I used to think
the Internet was safe,
but now...
220
00:09:49,153 --> 00:09:51,503
If you're so
responsible, Jackie,
221
00:09:51,547 --> 00:09:55,856
then why is your son
posting videos of people
all over the Internet?
222
00:09:55,899 --> 00:09:59,250
[SCOFFS] For your information,
he is not posting videos
of "people."
223
00:09:59,294 --> 00:10:00,817
He posted a video of you.
224
00:10:00,861 --> 00:10:02,253
Because the rest
of the people
225
00:10:02,297 --> 00:10:04,342
weren't dancing around
in their underwear.
226
00:10:05,866 --> 00:10:08,346
I feel like my innocence
has been taken from me.
227
00:10:10,697 --> 00:10:13,047
Are you at least going
to make him say he's sorry?
228
00:10:13,090 --> 00:10:15,919
Do you have any idea
how many people
might see this?
229
00:10:15,963 --> 00:10:18,313
Half a million.
But that was
just yesterday.
230
00:10:18,356 --> 00:10:20,924
By tomorrow,
you'll probably pass
Printer Cat.
231
00:10:20,968 --> 00:10:22,709
[JACKIE CHUCKLES]
232
00:10:25,537 --> 00:10:26,974
What is so funny?
233
00:10:27,017 --> 00:10:29,193
I was just thinking
about Printer Cat.
234
00:10:30,020 --> 00:10:31,021
[MIMICS PAWING]
235
00:10:34,416 --> 00:10:36,374
Okay, if it makes
you feel any better,
236
00:10:36,418 --> 00:10:39,290
Troy, just say
you're sorry.
237
00:10:39,334 --> 00:10:41,510
Sorry, Mrs. Kingston-Persons.
238
00:10:42,685 --> 00:10:45,166
I hope you're satisfied.
239
00:10:45,209 --> 00:10:47,342
You need to be
more responsible
with your child.
240
00:10:55,829 --> 00:10:59,180
Whoo! If that lady pointed
her finger at me one more time.
241
00:10:59,223 --> 00:11:00,877
Goodness gracious!
242
00:11:03,837 --> 00:11:06,709
I'm telling you, man,
Suzanne's video is huge.
243
00:11:06,753 --> 00:11:10,321
She's like the featured
video of the day
in 15 different websites.
244
00:11:10,365 --> 00:11:13,237
Your wife might be
the next Star Wars Kid.
245
00:11:13,281 --> 00:11:16,284
My wife is not gonna be
the next Star Wars Kid.
Turn it off.
246
00:11:16,327 --> 00:11:17,415
Turn what off?
247
00:11:17,459 --> 00:11:20,462
Nothing. Just some
stupid cat videos.
248
00:11:20,505 --> 00:11:23,465
Oh, well, you guys must be
the only ones watching that
249
00:11:23,508 --> 00:11:26,163
because everyone else
seems to be watching me.
250
00:11:26,207 --> 00:11:28,905
Did you know that video of me
has over a half-million hits?
251
00:11:28,949 --> 00:11:30,777
[CHUCKLES] Yeah,
that was yesterday.
252
00:11:30,820 --> 00:11:32,909
Today, it's more like
3.5 million.
253
00:11:32,953 --> 00:11:34,302
What?MARTIN: Oh, yeah.
254
00:11:34,345 --> 00:11:35,738
You better hope that
none of those kids
255
00:11:35,782 --> 00:11:37,740
watching this video
is good with Photoshop.
256
00:11:39,829 --> 00:11:41,831
Nick, you're my man,
257
00:11:41,875 --> 00:11:43,703
and you said that
this was gonna go away.
258
00:11:43,746 --> 00:11:45,748
So, I don't know
how you're gonna do it,
259
00:11:45,792 --> 00:11:47,707
but you have to get
that video off the Web.
260
00:11:47,750 --> 00:11:50,753
What am I supposed to do?
I can't just shut down
the Internet.
261
00:11:51,493 --> 00:11:52,537
Have you tried?
262
00:11:56,411 --> 00:11:57,499
[DOOR CLOSES]
263
00:11:57,542 --> 00:11:58,718
Listen, man, you do
what you need to do,
264
00:11:58,761 --> 00:11:59,762
but if you shut down
the Internet,
265
00:11:59,806 --> 00:12:01,459
you and me
are gonna have
a problem.
266
00:12:02,243 --> 00:12:03,331
Uh-uh.
267
00:12:11,600 --> 00:12:13,036
Suzanne, why aren't
you dressed?
268
00:12:13,080 --> 00:12:14,385
We gotta get going.
269
00:12:14,429 --> 00:12:16,561
How can you think of work
at a time like this?
270
00:12:16,605 --> 00:12:18,476
Because it's time
to go to work.
271
00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:20,478
I'm not going to work.
I'm too embarrassed.
272
00:12:20,522 --> 00:12:22,611
Gosh, you still worried
about that stupid video?
273
00:12:22,654 --> 00:12:25,745
Gigi, that stupid video
has over 5 million hits.
274
00:12:25,788 --> 00:12:28,356
And obviously
somebody at work
recognized me,
275
00:12:28,399 --> 00:12:32,447
because my inbox is filled
with videos of me dancing
to Baby Got Back.
276
00:12:32,490 --> 00:12:35,058
I even got an email
from Sir Mix-a-Lot.
277
00:12:35,102 --> 00:12:37,539
Well, it could
be worse.How?
278
00:12:37,582 --> 00:12:40,542
You could be dancing
to Everybody Dance Now
and Lord knows you don't
279
00:12:40,585 --> 00:12:42,326
want an email
from Freedom Williams.
280
00:12:43,632 --> 00:12:46,417
Why do I keep
falling for that?
281
00:12:46,461 --> 00:12:48,550
You know what,
you don't have anything
to be embarrassed about.
282
00:12:48,593 --> 00:12:49,986
Look at all
these cool comments.
283
00:12:50,030 --> 00:12:51,814
People think it's great.
284
00:12:51,858 --> 00:12:53,120
They think it's fun.
285
00:12:53,163 --> 00:12:56,297
[CHUCKLES] You're
making them laugh!
286
00:12:56,340 --> 00:12:57,820
Gigi, it's not funny.
287
00:12:57,864 --> 00:12:59,822
How would you feel
if this were a video of you?
288
00:12:59,866 --> 00:13:03,217
If this were a video of me,
I wouldn't be dancing,
289
00:13:03,260 --> 00:13:05,567
and there would be a whole
different set of comments.
290
00:13:13,749 --> 00:13:15,925
Okay, I have
Suzanne's video up.
291
00:13:15,969 --> 00:13:17,579
Okay, click play,
and tell me what happens.
292
00:13:17,622 --> 00:13:18,623
Okay.
293
00:13:20,582 --> 00:13:24,760
Oh, wait a second, I got
like a billion pop-ups here.
294
00:13:24,804 --> 00:13:27,719
Well, as a matter of fact,
I would like to meet
singles in my area.
295
00:13:27,763 --> 00:13:29,373
Thank you for asking.
296
00:13:30,853 --> 00:13:32,550
Okay, now the screen
just froze.
297
00:13:33,464 --> 00:13:35,162
Good. It works.
298
00:13:35,205 --> 00:13:36,816
You wanted
this to happen?
299
00:13:36,859 --> 00:13:40,036
I can't shut down the Internet,
but I can shut down the people.
300
00:13:40,080 --> 00:13:41,559
If they try
to watch this video,
301
00:13:41,603 --> 00:13:43,997
it'll be the last thing
they watch.
302
00:13:44,040 --> 00:13:46,216
So, you're willing to crash
20 million computers
303
00:13:46,260 --> 00:13:47,304
to save one marriage?
304
00:13:47,348 --> 00:13:49,654
Yes. Yes, I am.
305
00:13:55,138 --> 00:13:56,661
Okay. Now put
a little salt in it.
306
00:13:57,358 --> 00:13:59,621
Okay.
307
00:13:59,664 --> 00:14:02,319
Oh, baby, they haven't
taught you anything, have they?
308
00:14:03,625 --> 00:14:04,974
Excuse me.
309
00:14:05,018 --> 00:14:07,368
This is how you put
a little salt in it.
310
00:14:07,411 --> 00:14:08,630
Stir it up.
311
00:14:09,109 --> 00:14:10,719
Okay.
312
00:14:10,762 --> 00:14:12,677
Mmm! That smells good.
313
00:14:13,461 --> 00:14:14,723
What are we having?
314
00:14:14,766 --> 00:14:16,812
Well, Lindsey is making
Southern fried chicken,
315
00:14:16,856 --> 00:14:19,336
macaroni and cheese
and collard greens.
316
00:14:19,380 --> 00:14:21,208
And Marilyn's teaching me
how to make pot liquor.
317
00:14:21,251 --> 00:14:22,513
[BURSTS OUT LAUGHING]
318
00:14:23,514 --> 00:14:24,820
"Pot liquor."
319
00:14:26,430 --> 00:14:27,692
I hope she's
also teaching you
320
00:14:27,736 --> 00:14:29,738
how to make a cure
for type 2 diabetes.
321
00:14:29,781 --> 00:14:31,566
[LAUGHS]
322
00:14:31,609 --> 00:14:33,524
Type 2 diabetes.
323
00:14:33,568 --> 00:14:35,831
I worry about that kid.
324
00:14:35,875 --> 00:14:37,920
MARILYN: For your information,
I also taught Lindsey
325
00:14:37,964 --> 00:14:40,009
how to make my sweet
potato pound cake.
326
00:14:40,053 --> 00:14:42,882
Of course, you won't want it,
because you're afraid
you might get type 2 diabetes.
327
00:14:42,925 --> 00:14:44,927
[LAUGHS]
328
00:14:44,971 --> 00:14:46,233
"Type 2."
329
00:14:49,801 --> 00:14:52,021
KEVIN: Type 2,
you're funny!,
330
00:14:52,065 --> 00:14:53,893
MARILYN: Don't look at me,
I don't know
what's wrong with him.
331
00:14:54,937 --> 00:14:56,373
You made sweet
potato pound cake?
332
00:14:56,417 --> 00:14:58,027
Yep. With buttercream frosting.
333
00:14:58,071 --> 00:15:00,638
Oh, my God.
334
00:15:00,682 --> 00:15:03,467
See? I told you,
men can't resist
soul food.
335
00:15:03,511 --> 00:15:04,947
You're right.
336
00:15:04,991 --> 00:15:06,688
This pound cake's going to make
my blood pressure go up.
337
00:15:06,731 --> 00:15:09,430
Well, have one of these,
it'll send it right back down.
338
00:15:09,473 --> 00:15:11,127
[KEVIN LAUGHS]
339
00:15:12,302 --> 00:15:13,782
KEVIN: Blood pressure.
340
00:15:21,616 --> 00:15:24,097
Great. Now my computer
is frozen.
341
00:15:24,140 --> 00:15:26,099
Look, try hitting
the escape button.
342
00:15:26,142 --> 00:15:27,578
I tried that.
It didn't work.
343
00:15:27,622 --> 00:15:28,753
It's still frozen.
344
00:15:28,797 --> 00:15:30,625
Why do they even have
an escape button
345
00:15:30,668 --> 00:15:32,235
if it doesn't
help you escape?
346
00:15:32,279 --> 00:15:33,933
It feels more like a trap.
347
00:15:33,976 --> 00:15:36,674
Press the "command" key,
and start hitting
all of the other keys.
348
00:15:36,718 --> 00:15:37,849
What does that do?
349
00:15:37,893 --> 00:15:39,329
I don't know, but we're
about to find out.
350
00:15:40,635 --> 00:15:43,943
Suzanne, I've solved
your problem.
351
00:15:44,944 --> 00:15:46,641
Thank you, honey.
352
00:15:46,684 --> 00:15:48,425
But now I have
a new problem.
353
00:15:48,469 --> 00:15:51,994
I clicked on my video,
and my computer is frozen.
354
00:15:52,038 --> 00:15:53,169
That's not the problem.
355
00:15:54,301 --> 00:15:55,824
That's the solution.
356
00:15:55,867 --> 00:15:58,218
Just restart your computer,
and everything will be fine.
357
00:15:58,958 --> 00:16:00,524
I don't understand.
358
00:16:00,568 --> 00:16:02,439
I'm your man.
359
00:16:03,527 --> 00:16:05,225
You're responsible
for this?
360
00:16:05,268 --> 00:16:06,748
Yes, I am.
361
00:16:06,791 --> 00:16:09,446
I figured I couldn't stop
the video from circulating,
362
00:16:09,490 --> 00:16:13,320
so I attached a virus
to the keywords
associated to the video.
363
00:16:13,363 --> 00:16:15,975
Now, people will stay away
from your video
like the plague.
364
00:16:17,150 --> 00:16:18,934
I have my own virus.
365
00:16:18,978 --> 00:16:20,501
Yes, you do.
366
00:16:20,544 --> 00:16:23,547
Oh, my God.
That is so romantic.
367
00:16:24,548 --> 00:16:25,985
I want a virus.
368
00:16:26,028 --> 00:16:27,247
Give it time.
369
00:16:29,162 --> 00:16:30,424
Nick.
370
00:16:31,077 --> 00:16:32,165
She'll get one.
371
00:16:37,300 --> 00:16:39,999
Dad gave you a virus?
That's awesome.
372
00:16:41,217 --> 00:16:42,784
Yes, it is awesome.
373
00:16:42,827 --> 00:16:45,352
But what wasn't awesome
was you leaving
your webcam running
374
00:16:45,395 --> 00:16:46,831
so Troy could record me.
375
00:16:47,832 --> 00:16:50,705
I know. I'm sorry.
376
00:16:50,748 --> 00:16:53,012
It's okay.
Apology accepted.
377
00:16:53,055 --> 00:16:54,404
Here's your computer back.
378
00:16:54,448 --> 00:16:56,276
Thanks.Mmm-hmm.
379
00:16:56,319 --> 00:16:58,582
Mom, have you
seen the lotion?
380
00:17:01,846 --> 00:17:05,459
Produce some ashy elbows,
and then maybe you can have
the lotion back.
381
00:17:14,163 --> 00:17:17,949
Sweetheart, this is delicious.
You did a fantastic job.
382
00:17:17,993 --> 00:17:19,560
Thank you.
383
00:17:19,603 --> 00:17:21,344
I'm gonna have
to use my Bullworker
for about five hours
384
00:17:21,388 --> 00:17:23,129
to burn off
all of these calories.
385
00:17:23,172 --> 00:17:24,521
Pass the gravy.
386
00:17:24,565 --> 00:17:27,263
I love gravy.I love gravy, too.
387
00:17:27,307 --> 00:17:29,004
Gravy goes
with everything,
388
00:17:29,048 --> 00:17:31,224
chicken, biscuits,
mashed potatoes.
389
00:17:31,267 --> 00:17:33,443
Gravy even tastes
good with gravy.
390
00:17:33,487 --> 00:17:35,184
This gravy's so good,
you don't need the food.
391
00:17:35,228 --> 00:17:36,403
[LAUGHTER]
392
00:17:36,446 --> 00:17:38,318
I gained three pounds
just smelling it.
393
00:17:38,361 --> 00:17:41,103
I'd have to dance like you
in that video to burn it off.
394
00:17:41,147 --> 00:17:42,670
[LAUGHTER]
395
00:17:42,713 --> 00:17:44,541
You know, now that
I think about it,
396
00:17:44,585 --> 00:17:46,239
the video was
kind of funny.
397
00:17:46,282 --> 00:17:47,762
Plus, it all worked out
in my favor.
398
00:17:47,805 --> 00:17:50,504
It was so popular, I actually
gained clients from it.
399
00:17:50,547 --> 00:17:53,202
Wow!See? That's great!
400
00:17:53,246 --> 00:17:54,812
Everything worked out
for the best.
401
00:17:56,075 --> 00:17:58,729
Whew! I haven't
eaten like this in years.
402
00:17:58,773 --> 00:17:59,991
You used to eat like this?
403
00:18:00,035 --> 00:18:02,081
Sure. Every day,
when I played football.
404
00:18:02,124 --> 00:18:06,041
He didn't get to be 300 pounds
by eating flavorless, skinless,
stress-free chicken.
405
00:18:08,043 --> 00:18:10,306
You know, as much
as I hate to admit it,
406
00:18:10,350 --> 00:18:12,091
this is just like
a Sunday dinner.
407
00:18:16,399 --> 00:18:17,705
Wow.
408
00:18:17,748 --> 00:18:19,750
This is very good.My goodness.
409
00:18:30,370 --> 00:18:31,849
♪ Shake that healthy butt
410
00:18:31,893 --> 00:18:34,200
♪ Baby got back!
LA face with Oakland booty
411
00:18:34,243 --> 00:18:39,030
♪ LA face with Oakland booty
412
00:18:39,074 --> 00:18:40,336
♪ Baby got back!
413
00:18:40,380 --> 00:18:41,946
And in technology news,
414
00:18:41,990 --> 00:18:45,211
reports are spreading
of a crippling new computer bug
415
00:18:45,254 --> 00:18:48,518
experts have dubbed
the Dancing Housewife virus.
416
00:18:48,562 --> 00:18:51,695
Apparently, when you click
on this viral video
417
00:18:51,739 --> 00:18:55,351
of a woman dancing
to Sir Mix-a-Lot's hit
Baby Got Back,
418
00:18:55,395 --> 00:18:59,790
it freezes your computer,
sends you countless pop-up ads,
419
00:18:59,834 --> 00:19:01,836
and, in some
extreme cases,
420
00:19:01,879 --> 00:19:03,838
wipes out your
entire hard drive.
421
00:19:26,252 --> 00:19:27,470
[BOTH SHUDDER]
422
00:19:32,823 --> 00:19:34,347
What time is it?
423
00:19:35,261 --> 00:19:36,262
It's Thursday.
424
00:19:37,741 --> 00:19:39,482
MARILYN: I forgot
to warn you guys.
425
00:19:39,526 --> 00:19:42,050
That's one of the side effects
of eating soul food.
426
00:19:42,093 --> 00:19:43,660
It's been known
to put you to sleep.
427
00:19:43,704 --> 00:19:45,271
For a day and a half?
428
00:19:46,576 --> 00:19:48,056
[DOORBELL RINGS]
429
00:19:48,099 --> 00:19:50,101
My ears keep ringing.
430
00:19:50,145 --> 00:19:52,365
LINDSEY:
That's not your ears,
that's the doorbell.
431
00:19:52,408 --> 00:19:54,323
Oh. Coming.
432
00:19:57,631 --> 00:19:58,675
Coming.
433
00:19:58,719 --> 00:20:00,677
[NICK GROANING]
434
00:20:01,722 --> 00:20:03,332
NICK: Ow! My leg!
435
00:20:08,816 --> 00:20:10,644
Hi, Mrs. Kingston-Persons.
436
00:20:10,687 --> 00:20:12,123
Hi, Mr. Kingston-Persons.
437
00:20:12,167 --> 00:20:13,734
Hi, Troy.
438
00:20:14,952 --> 00:20:16,171
Do you guys have cake?
439
00:20:16,824 --> 00:20:17,912
In the kitchen.
440
00:20:19,218 --> 00:20:21,045
What can we
do for you, Jackie?
441
00:20:21,089 --> 00:20:23,352
The Dancing Housewife virus
crashed my computer.
442
00:20:23,396 --> 00:20:24,745
I need you to fix it.
443
00:20:24,788 --> 00:20:26,355
What does that
have to do with me?
444
00:20:26,399 --> 00:20:28,836
Well, if your wife hadn't been
prancing around on the Internet,
445
00:20:28,879 --> 00:20:31,534
none of this
would have happened.
446
00:20:31,578 --> 00:20:33,406
If you knew that
there was a virus,
Jackie,
447
00:20:33,449 --> 00:20:35,234
then why would you
click on the video?
448
00:20:37,453 --> 00:20:39,455
I was trying to figure out
how you did it.
449
00:20:47,376 --> 00:20:48,856
Is she still
doing it, Nick?
450
00:20:49,596 --> 00:20:50,814
Yep.
451
00:20:52,338 --> 00:20:54,340
Maybe you can show me.Hmm.
452
00:20:54,383 --> 00:20:56,211
Want some cake?
453
00:20:56,255 --> 00:20:58,387
We got some sweet
potato pound cake.
454
00:21:00,389 --> 00:21:01,912
Let me fix this.
Let me fix this.
33431
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