Original subtitles

Oh, Daddy!

You know what?

Mr. Ties.

What is that, German? Viking?

Family name.

Thank you.

This is quite a strong family name. Does it stand for something?

We'll just have to leave it. It was a long -standing nickname.

Oh, of man and tree. Hi.

What is it, Hope?

You know I'm in a meeting here, right? I know, but I come to bring everybody

water, and I see you already got coffee.

I just wanted to see how you were doing today.

I'm sorry, guys.

Don't worry.

You have such a lovely daughter.

Oh, yeah. Cute.

Which brings us why we're here today.

Yeah, why are you here?

Damn, Camille. Put your claws away.

She's just really looking out for your best interest. I'm your secretary.

what I'm supposed to do.

We understand that. We understand. We see that you're getting older in age.

Oh! Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Daddy, you're not getting older. You're almost, you know, what, like 21 by now?

So, yeah.

You better, like, check your sister.

She's taking a whole year.

But you just called him home. I didn't call him home.

Thank you, Helen. You're welcome.

Thank you.

You know, like your daughter, I know if anything were to happen to you, you'd

like to make sure she was taken care of, right?

Well, of course.

I know she probably helps take care of you a lot, you know, like all the time.

She's even taking care of all of us right now. We really appreciate that.

And... Make the room a little bit calmer. Yes, and... Can we get to the

Okay.

Like, it's inevitable.

We all die. I know it.

I know it's hard to say. Like, we all die, but many of us, we don't leave

the proper means for our loved ones to take care of themselves once they're

gone. That's a will.

But, you know, but sometimes you don't have enough money saved up.

And... Thank you. You're welcome.

You seem nervous.

Oh, I'm not nervous at all. I'm just trying to make sure this family gets the

proper care that they need if anything were to happen. You never know what

happen.

You know how heart disease is a very common thing.

As you are starting to near some of your later years, I know some physical

activity, especially around the house,

Little things, you know, it could start bringing you closer to that. Would

anybody like some cookies? I'm sorry.

Oh, I want one. And can I please get your guys' names?

Oh, yes, yes. I'm Mr. Grand.

Mr.

Grand, yes. Do you have a first name or is that Mr. Grand? Oh, it's just Mr.,

like, it's a family name. I don't want to go into it. Is that M -R or M -I -R?

Is it M -R with a period after it? Yes.

I went to college. Oh, wow, wow.

I couldn't really tell. I'm a gay man, actually.

Me too.

Man,

we miss, nice to meet you. Nice to meet you.

Oh, I should be quiet.

Okay, by the way, your daughter's cookies are amazing.

I wouldn't mind eating her cookies any day. You are so amazing.

But, and thinking of that, you would not want her to not have her sweet cookies

available once you were gone, right? You would still want others to enjoy her

sweet cookies after she was gone. Cookie or cookies?

Oh, cookies, yes.

Plural,

yes. Daddy, I missed you.

I just love seeing, like, don't you just love seeing happy families? I do.

You did ask her a question. I'll give her that. Okay.

Well, anyways.

Thank you.

You know, a lot of people.

Daddy, remember when we used to sing Humpty Dumpty?

We used to sing Humpty Dumpty. Yeah. We had a great fall. Yeah, and I used to

fall. Yeah.

She's just a bundle of joys.

Like, I can just feel her warming me up right now. Is she warming you up? Like,

I can feel a little bit.

She warms up the whole room.

Yeah, I know. Like.

Is there a fan or anything?

Sorry, no, they just put in a chandelier. I'll take out the fan. Yeah,

apologize for my hair.

Like, when the humidity comes.

You can't have that Paul Revere look going on there.

Well, thank you.

That's not a good thing. Has anybody ever told you you look like Russell?

Katy Perry's ex -husband?

She's incredible. You know what? I don't really watch too much TV.

Her kids.

Oh, yeah.

I know you probably have some people in here trying to sell

you term life insurance.

That's just not for you.

You're going to be around for a while. You need him around for a while, right?

Yes, I need him around for a while.

He helps satisfy a lot of your needs that a good father does.

And when do you want to keep those same needs going on should something happen

to you?

Most of the time, yeah.

Your daughter still needs to be taken care of even when you can't.

And that's what we're here for.

Well, I just hope he's around for a long, long time.

I'm sure your dad will be. And we're not here saying that.

You're going to die any day soon. I hope not. Literally, we're not.

In case of anything were to happen, you would want this company to be in your

family's hands still. Yes.

That's not a script.

There's a script?

No, there's no script. You heard that, correct? There's a script.

Wait a minute.

It seems kind of like some weird scheme.

Oh, no, never.

Here is the spectacle of you two now. No. What would happen if I Googled your

names or your company?

Oh, oh. Is this legitimate?

No, of course. You said your name was Mandy Muse and you're Mr.

Grand? Yeah, Mr. Grand.

I'll be doing my research later. Yeah, so will I.

Well, that's what I pay you for. Yeah, but don't worry.

Just don't type it in Pornhub or anything.

I told you to put the blockers on the computer, okay?

But anyways, for a little low price, only $500, I know it might sound like,

that's a lot of money. But it's really not when you think about the coverage

get. That's a $2 million policy.

Should anything happen, like you're driving down the road one day and

you become distracted.

Do you become distracted at times from activities?

I think we all do, like, yeah. That's what he asked me for. There's

everywhere. And you can try to find them.

There are distractions I run into sometimes.

Really, Daddy?

Mm -hmm. I missed you so much. I missed you, too. Thank you.

Now, would you want that smile to ever stop should you stop being here?

No. And that's what we're here for. We're here to give you that peace of

that comfort, that...

This pretty smile right here. Thank you for feeling me. Thank you. Thank you.

Another one.

Thank you.

I mean, I guess I understand the warm feeling. Thank you.

Thank you.

Yeah.

I can understand that warm feeling. You can get a really warm feeling sometimes.

See, look, it seems like you're already distracted.

Right. I had a thought about it. Mr. Ties, are you feeling well? You need a

little water. You look a little flushed right now. I know. It is hot in here.

It's a little hot.

I mean, it does get kind of, you know, hot when you're talking about, like, you

know, like the drinks.

What, you got a death fetish or something?

It doesn't know us.

Something smells around here.

I don't know.

Never mind.

That's highly unprofessional of me today.

Okay,

wait a minute here.

But also, while we're here, we do have health insurance available as well. If

you do need to maybe see about this redness in your skin, it could be a

My lawyer mom just died last month from... You don't have to tell

Well, she had our life insurance, so it's fabulous.

And let me guess, you were the beneficiary.

You know how bad we need to sell right now. Like, we're going under.

Okay, I think y 'all need to figure some things out.

And I'm going to leave you be.

So you have a wonderful day today.

Yeah, I think that we can discuss more better this way. You know, like, so that

way you're not distracted by your daughter. She's quite the distraction.

You know what?

I'm thinking that I'm going to just let my assistant do her homework after some

of the things that... Oh, I think I've done enough homework.

Oh, my God.

Can I have your autograph?

I'm sure, yeah.

What did I tell you?

There you go, yeah.

Thank you.

He says you don't want to keep sucking dicks or trying to sell life insurance.

I said, wait, you just got a shit dick. Maybe he'll sell.

We do need to make rent this month.

So, Mr. Tiles, we have another intriguing business offer for you.