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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,868 --> 00:00:03,870 I mean, when my boyfriend Oscar found out 2 00:00:03,964 --> 00:00:05,809 that my best friend Max told me he wanted to kiss me, 3 00:00:06,039 --> 00:00:07,478 I didn't know how he'd react. 4 00:00:07,822 --> 00:00:08,823 Oscar? 5 00:00:08,989 --> 00:00:10,898 Are you there? 6 00:00:11,044 --> 00:00:12,045 Are you mad? 7 00:00:12,138 --> 00:00:14,380 Damn Joey Lawrence and his big mouth. 8 00:00:14,474 --> 00:00:16,049 I forgot to mention that part. 9 00:00:16,069 --> 00:00:19,145 Oscar found out about the whole Max thing from Joey Lawrence. 10 00:00:19,166 --> 00:00:21,054 You remember that show, right? It was, like, him 11 00:00:21,074 --> 00:00:23,222 and the sister with the flower hat. She used to, like, 12 00:00:23,243 --> 00:00:24,818 - dance like this... - Whoa! 13 00:00:24,839 --> 00:00:26,830 Exactly! "Whoa!" Anyway, 14 00:00:26,987 --> 00:00:29,228 Oscar didn't say anything for almost three minutes, 15 00:00:29,249 --> 00:00:30,490 and I was starting to freak out. 16 00:00:30,511 --> 00:00:33,253 I'm starting to freak out. Say something. 17 00:00:34,515 --> 00:00:36,006 Okay, now you're standing. Is standing good? 18 00:00:36,235 --> 00:00:38,509 I mean, it can be. That movie Stand and Deliver was good, 19 00:00:38,738 --> 00:00:41,407 but Stephen King's The Stand was so scary. 20 00:00:41,501 --> 00:00:43,347 You... picked... me! 21 00:00:43,576 --> 00:00:45,411 Over Max, with his perfect hair, 22 00:00:45,432 --> 00:00:47,518 chiseled jaw and searing blue eyes. 23 00:00:47,747 --> 00:00:49,561 So you're not mad? 24 00:00:53,941 --> 00:00:55,922 He was not mad. 25 00:00:56,016 --> 00:00:58,184 In fact, things got a little smoky, 26 00:00:58,205 --> 00:00:59,425 if you know what I mean. 27 00:00:59,592 --> 00:01:01,021 That's a nice story. 28 00:01:01,114 --> 00:01:02,188 Can I have my coffee now? 29 00:01:02,209 --> 00:01:03,252 Oh! Yeah. 30 00:01:03,262 --> 00:01:05,525 Sorry. Enjoy! 31 00:01:05,546 --> 00:01:08,121 Little tip: don't ask her how her day's going. 32 00:01:09,216 --> 00:01:11,166 Hi. How are you doing today? 33 00:01:12,032 --> 00:01:13,106 Fine. 34 00:01:13,126 --> 00:01:15,379 I'm fine, too. You want to know why? 35 00:01:15,608 --> 00:01:18,006 It all started at Mr. Meowskers' funeral. 36 00:01:22,803 --> 00:01:24,638 Special delivery for Ms. Katharine Silver. 37 00:01:24,794 --> 00:01:27,547 Well, golly gee, that's me. 38 00:01:28,308 --> 00:01:29,643 Is this actually mine though? 39 00:01:29,799 --> 00:01:31,311 No, kiss is the special delivery. 40 00:01:31,468 --> 00:01:32,740 That's just a prop. 41 00:01:32,813 --> 00:01:33,876 Oh, my goodness, 42 00:01:33,970 --> 00:01:36,963 I cannot get over how cute y'all are. 43 00:01:36,984 --> 00:01:38,381 How long you been dating now? 44 00:01:38,391 --> 00:01:39,799 How long have we been dating? 45 00:01:39,893 --> 00:01:40,988 Well, when do we start counting? 46 00:01:41,144 --> 00:01:42,364 Yeah, is it the first time we met? 47 00:01:42,552 --> 00:01:43,751 Ooh, or the first time we kissed? 48 00:01:43,886 --> 00:01:46,556 Or the, uh, first time we, you know... 49 00:01:46,650 --> 00:01:48,954 You mean the first time I rocked your world? 50 00:01:50,059 --> 00:01:52,405 Let's just go with when you met. 51 00:01:52,562 --> 00:01:53,834 Almost four months. 52 00:01:53,990 --> 00:01:55,502 Aw. How y'all gonna celebrate? 53 00:01:55,659 --> 00:01:58,672 Marty and I got our ears pierced on our four-month anniversary. 54 00:01:58,828 --> 00:02:01,508 Oh, uh, we don't really have anything planned. 55 00:02:01,665 --> 00:02:03,072 Did you want to do something? 56 00:02:03,083 --> 00:02:04,740 I got both my ears pierced in college. 57 00:02:04,834 --> 00:02:05,919 They got really infected. 58 00:02:06,075 --> 00:02:07,087 I almost lost a lobe. 59 00:02:07,243 --> 00:02:09,182 But I am willing to roll the dice for you. 60 00:02:09,412 --> 00:02:10,580 No, that's okay. 61 00:02:10,590 --> 00:02:12,759 I... I like your ears just the way they are. 62 00:02:12,915 --> 00:02:14,167 They are nice. 63 00:02:14,187 --> 00:02:16,106 Very soft. 64 00:02:17,086 --> 00:02:18,358 As weirdly soothing as this is, 65 00:02:18,515 --> 00:02:20,923 I should probably deliver this package before I lose it. 66 00:02:20,934 --> 00:02:22,102 Does that happen often? 67 00:02:22,258 --> 00:02:24,656 Officially? No. 68 00:02:26,356 --> 00:02:28,368 Oh! You forgot your phone! 69 00:02:28,525 --> 00:02:29,526 One more kiss for the road? 70 00:02:29,526 --> 00:02:31,267 Permission to dip my best gal? 71 00:02:31,277 --> 00:02:33,749 Permission granted, sailor. 72 00:02:37,033 --> 00:02:38,712 - Oh! Oh, God! - Ow! 73 00:02:42,622 --> 00:02:43,884 Okay. 74 00:02:45,615 --> 00:02:47,127 Catch you on the flip side. 75 00:02:47,283 --> 00:02:50,119 - Toodles! - Did you just say "toodles"? 76 00:02:50,130 --> 00:02:52,392 He started it with "flip side." 77 00:02:53,456 --> 00:02:54,457 I don't know how to act when he's around. 78 00:02:54,457 --> 00:02:55,562 No, I get it. 79 00:02:55,791 --> 00:02:57,564 I just really hope we can get past this. 80 00:02:57,721 --> 00:03:00,129 I don't expect you to be besties or anything. 81 00:03:00,140 --> 00:03:02,215 I'm lying. I do. 82 00:03:02,308 --> 00:03:04,404 I did kinda like him before. 83 00:03:04,571 --> 00:03:05,885 Yeah, let's build on that. 84 00:03:05,979 --> 00:03:09,242 You know, you can't just throw away "kinda like." 85 00:03:10,973 --> 00:03:12,579 I guess I'm up for it if Max is. 86 00:03:12,746 --> 00:03:13,747 Thank you. 87 00:03:13,903 --> 00:03:15,311 Oh. I landed on this. 88 00:03:15,321 --> 00:03:16,395 Are you gonna get in trouble? 89 00:03:16,416 --> 00:03:17,647 No. Happens all the time. 90 00:03:17,657 --> 00:03:20,212 - Really? - Officially? No. 91 00:03:21,995 --> 00:03:23,486 Okay. 92 00:03:23,580 --> 00:03:24,591 I have to go. 93 00:03:24,820 --> 00:03:25,988 I'm gonna be late for work. 94 00:03:25,988 --> 00:03:27,333 Aw, just five more minutes. 95 00:03:27,427 --> 00:03:28,658 No, you said that ten minutes ago. 96 00:03:28,668 --> 00:03:30,263 You're like a sexy snooze button. 97 00:03:31,494 --> 00:03:33,433 You know you talk in your sleep? 98 00:03:33,590 --> 00:03:35,435 - Did you know you fart in yours? - Yeah. 99 00:03:35,665 --> 00:03:38,178 You told me in your sleep. 100 00:03:38,334 --> 00:03:40,180 What's the deal with this tattoo? 101 00:03:40,336 --> 00:03:42,109 Uh, it's a fish. 102 00:03:42,265 --> 00:03:44,184 I can see it's a fish. 103 00:03:44,340 --> 00:03:45,779 What does it mean? 104 00:03:45,935 --> 00:03:46,936 What's it matter? 105 00:03:47,009 --> 00:03:48,094 I don't know. I mean, 106 00:03:48,188 --> 00:03:49,929 there's just so much I don't know about you. 107 00:03:49,950 --> 00:03:52,765 Well, I like keeping things mysterious with us. 108 00:03:52,859 --> 00:03:54,694 You know, we are secret hookup friends, 109 00:03:54,788 --> 00:03:57,019 not "know your time of birth" friends. 110 00:03:57,113 --> 00:03:59,355 Wait, I'll give you a ride. 111 00:03:59,365 --> 00:04:00,773 We can't show up at the same time. 112 00:04:00,867 --> 00:04:03,192 Kat is already suspicious about where I've been sleeping. 113 00:04:03,286 --> 00:04:05,945 Wouldn't it just be easier to tell everyone about us? 114 00:04:06,039 --> 00:04:07,040 Nope. 115 00:04:07,134 --> 00:04:09,365 Okay, but before you go, 116 00:04:09,459 --> 00:04:11,367 one small detail about you. 117 00:04:11,461 --> 00:04:12,545 Your middle name. 118 00:04:12,639 --> 00:04:14,047 Nope. 119 00:04:14,203 --> 00:04:15,371 Thank you 120 00:04:15,381 --> 00:04:17,352 for the intercourse. 121 00:04:23,316 --> 00:04:25,152 Hey. I brought you something. 122 00:04:25,308 --> 00:04:26,465 Ooh, muffin. 123 00:04:26,518 --> 00:04:28,050 I asked you not to call me that. 124 00:04:28,061 --> 00:04:31,397 Your dad would be proud to know his jokes live on. 125 00:04:31,491 --> 00:04:33,066 Hey, uh, while I'm here, 126 00:04:33,160 --> 00:04:35,068 maybe we could talk about the Oscar thing? 127 00:04:38,394 --> 00:04:39,833 Come on, Max. This is important. 128 00:04:41,658 --> 00:04:43,879 Fine. We'll do it your way. 129 00:04:47,914 --> 00:04:49,082 ♪ You can't use music ♪ 130 00:04:49,082 --> 00:04:51,970 ♪ To avoid the subject ♪ 131 00:04:52,908 --> 00:04:54,014 ♪ Watch me ♪ 132 00:04:54,243 --> 00:04:56,329 ♪ Come on, I really want you ♪ 133 00:04:56,349 --> 00:04:58,831 ♪ And Oscar to get along ♪ 134 00:04:58,852 --> 00:05:01,167 ♪ That sounds awkward ♪ 135 00:05:01,188 --> 00:05:03,023 ♪ Maybe if you hung out a little ♪ 136 00:05:03,252 --> 00:05:05,025 ♪ Things would get better ♪ 137 00:05:05,254 --> 00:05:08,528 - ♪ Please? Please? ♪ - ♪ No, no ♪ 138 00:05:08,758 --> 00:05:11,187 ♪ Please? Please? Please? ♪ 139 00:05:12,021 --> 00:05:13,022 ♪ What would we even do? ♪ 140 00:05:13,095 --> 00:05:15,452 ♪ I'm not sure ♪ 141 00:05:16,203 --> 00:05:19,372 ♪ Oscar likes kites ♪ 142 00:05:20,874 --> 00:05:23,689 ♪ I've never successfully gotten one off the ground ♪ 143 00:05:23,710 --> 00:05:25,608 ♪ Kids used to make fun of me ♪ 144 00:05:25,618 --> 00:05:29,341 ♪ But thank you for unlocking that painful memory ♪ 145 00:05:30,112 --> 00:05:32,219 ♪ Okay, no kites ♪ 146 00:05:33,115 --> 00:05:34,387 ♪ How 'bout racquetball? ♪ 147 00:05:34,544 --> 00:05:35,962 ♪ Or pickleball? ♪ 148 00:05:36,118 --> 00:05:37,297 ♪ Or other balls ♪ 149 00:05:37,390 --> 00:05:38,725 ♪ That men play together ♪ 150 00:05:38,954 --> 00:05:40,466 ♪ Stop, I'll think of something ♪ 151 00:05:40,623 --> 00:05:42,958 ♪ Thank you ♪ 152 00:05:42,969 --> 00:05:45,127 ♪ I got to get back to work ♪ 153 00:05:45,221 --> 00:05:47,807 ♪ But it's been really fun talking this way ♪ 154 00:05:47,901 --> 00:05:49,976 ♪ I'm coming round to it ♪ 155 00:05:50,132 --> 00:05:51,634 ♪ Get off your ass ♪ 156 00:05:51,644 --> 00:05:55,971 ♪ And help me unload this beer! ♪ 157 00:05:59,767 --> 00:06:01,435 Look at this soft kitty. 158 00:06:01,435 --> 00:06:03,270 Are these not the furriest paws you've ever seen? 159 00:06:03,281 --> 00:06:04,678 Clearly you have not spent 160 00:06:04,699 --> 00:06:07,201 a lot of time around Mama's feet. 161 00:06:08,098 --> 00:06:10,100 Oh, Katharine, I brought you a little something. 162 00:06:10,111 --> 00:06:11,278 Oh, thank you. 163 00:06:11,435 --> 00:06:14,188 - What is it? - It's a fertility statue. 164 00:06:14,292 --> 00:06:15,533 For your anniversary. 165 00:06:15,689 --> 00:06:18,630 Put it above your bed next time you and Oscar, 166 00:06:18,776 --> 00:06:20,444 you know, make pudding. 167 00:06:21,351 --> 00:06:25,449 This is why I was 19 before I knew where babies came from. 168 00:06:25,470 --> 00:06:28,045 How did you know it was my anniversary? 169 00:06:28,139 --> 00:06:29,453 A little birdie told me. 170 00:06:29,547 --> 00:06:31,309 Tweet, tweet. 171 00:06:31,455 --> 00:06:33,718 So, what are you and Oscar gonna do? 172 00:06:33,811 --> 00:06:38,931 Kat seems surprisingly reluctant to mark this momentous occasion. 173 00:06:38,952 --> 00:06:40,964 It's not momentous. It's four months. 174 00:06:41,058 --> 00:06:44,207 Yes, the longest relationship you've ever had. 175 00:06:44,395 --> 00:06:45,740 There should be fireworks. 176 00:06:45,969 --> 00:06:47,075 Banks should close. 177 00:06:47,304 --> 00:06:49,306 Drag queens should dress like you. 178 00:06:50,589 --> 00:06:52,747 Well, I-I suppose I could do something. 179 00:06:52,976 --> 00:06:55,083 But I've got to play it cool. I don't want to scare him off. 180 00:06:55,239 --> 00:06:56,584 You remember what happened with Ben. 181 00:06:56,741 --> 00:06:58,920 ♪ It's only been three weeks ♪ 182 00:06:59,149 --> 00:07:02,486 ♪ But I think you're kinda neat ♪ 183 00:07:02,507 --> 00:07:05,426 ♪ So this may be precursory ♪ 184 00:07:05,583 --> 00:07:08,846 ♪ But happy anniversary! ♪ 185 00:07:11,922 --> 00:07:13,591 I think we should break up. 186 00:07:14,279 --> 00:07:17,855 I wouldn't want a grandchild with Ben's eyebrows anyway. 187 00:07:18,001 --> 00:07:19,263 Oh, I have an idea. 188 00:07:19,284 --> 00:07:23,674 How 'bout I help cook a nice, tasteful dinner for you and Oscar. 189 00:07:23,695 --> 00:07:24,862 No tap shoes needed. 190 00:07:25,113 --> 00:07:27,219 Oh, you're like my own little Cupid. 191 00:07:27,375 --> 00:07:30,368 Oh, I'll bring my bow and arrows! 192 00:07:30,462 --> 00:07:31,463 Metaphorically. 193 00:07:31,546 --> 00:07:33,767 I don't need another lawsuit. 194 00:07:35,873 --> 00:07:37,458 What-what are you doing? 195 00:07:37,469 --> 00:07:39,043 I'm just getting it warmed up. 196 00:07:39,064 --> 00:07:40,732 Stop it! 197 00:07:48,949 --> 00:07:50,294 What's going on? 198 00:07:50,450 --> 00:07:52,140 Oh. I was trying not to wake you. 199 00:07:52,286 --> 00:07:53,474 I'm meeting Max to go running. 200 00:07:53,620 --> 00:07:56,561 Really? Oh, that's great! I'm so happy! 201 00:07:56,717 --> 00:07:59,147 Can I come? No, no, no, you guys need to bond. 202 00:07:59,240 --> 00:08:02,567 Um, hey, I was just thinking... if you're not busy tonight, 203 00:08:02,723 --> 00:08:04,652 maybe we could do something for our anniversary. 204 00:08:04,798 --> 00:08:06,300 Sure. What'd you have in mind? 205 00:08:06,393 --> 00:08:08,635 Um, just, like, a little dinner. No big deal. 206 00:08:08,656 --> 00:08:11,138 A year anniversary... that would be a big deal. 207 00:08:11,159 --> 00:08:12,431 You know? Eight months... medium deal. 208 00:08:12,472 --> 00:08:14,245 But this, you know, it's no big deal. 209 00:08:14,474 --> 00:08:16,581 Got it. Little dinner, no big deal. 210 00:08:16,810 --> 00:08:17,915 See you tonight. 211 00:08:21,273 --> 00:08:22,316 Oh. Randi. 212 00:08:22,316 --> 00:08:24,589 - Good morning! - Is it? 213 00:08:30,918 --> 00:08:33,890 Hey! I just got to stop for a minute! 214 00:08:35,110 --> 00:08:36,330 We're not so much running together 215 00:08:36,423 --> 00:08:38,436 as I'm chasing you. 216 00:08:39,687 --> 00:08:42,690 Okay, maybe I was pushing it a bit. 217 00:08:42,784 --> 00:08:45,276 I just wanted to win at something. 218 00:08:46,006 --> 00:08:48,769 - You're taller. - Thank you. I needed that. 219 00:08:50,531 --> 00:08:52,784 Listen, I know things have been awkward between us, 220 00:08:52,940 --> 00:08:54,275 and I know it's my fault. 221 00:08:54,295 --> 00:08:56,204 You mean 'cause you made a move on my girlfriend? 222 00:08:57,351 --> 00:08:58,456 Well... 223 00:08:58,612 --> 00:09:01,459 if you want to get technical about it. 224 00:09:02,689 --> 00:09:04,524 Yeah. I owe you an apology. 225 00:09:04,545 --> 00:09:06,287 Cool. 226 00:09:06,307 --> 00:09:08,424 Cool. 227 00:09:09,310 --> 00:09:10,729 Was that it? 228 00:09:10,791 --> 00:09:13,012 Oh, I thought it was. Uh... 229 00:09:13,888 --> 00:09:14,889 I will elaborate. 230 00:09:14,962 --> 00:09:17,037 Um... 231 00:09:17,058 --> 00:09:18,299 You're a nice guy, 232 00:09:18,392 --> 00:09:20,301 and you didn't deserve what I did. 233 00:09:20,321 --> 00:09:22,230 Neither did she. 234 00:09:22,323 --> 00:09:23,314 I'm sorry. 235 00:09:23,377 --> 00:09:24,711 I can forgive you 236 00:09:24,732 --> 00:09:27,151 if we never have to go running again. 237 00:09:27,308 --> 00:09:28,309 Deal. 238 00:09:28,329 --> 00:09:29,987 - How 'bout pancakes? - Great. 239 00:09:30,217 --> 00:09:31,718 But... I need you 240 00:09:31,739 --> 00:09:32,834 - to do me a favor. - Sure. 241 00:09:32,980 --> 00:09:34,158 Carry me. 242 00:09:40,821 --> 00:09:43,063 Stop calling the café for coffee. 243 00:09:43,157 --> 00:09:44,564 Stop keeping me up all night. 244 00:09:44,585 --> 00:09:45,659 You don't mean that. 245 00:09:45,753 --> 00:09:47,338 No, I do not. 246 00:09:48,162 --> 00:09:49,330 Well, you know, Kat asked me 247 00:09:49,423 --> 00:09:51,071 to take her lingerie shopping later. 248 00:09:51,165 --> 00:09:53,667 Maybe I'll pick up something you might enjoy. 249 00:09:53,688 --> 00:09:55,628 Ooh. I would like that, 250 00:09:55,774 --> 00:09:57,348 Miss Randi Elizabeth. 251 00:09:57,504 --> 00:09:59,350 What the hell did you just call me? 252 00:09:59,506 --> 00:10:01,102 Your name? 253 00:10:01,248 --> 00:10:03,083 - But who told you? - I ain't no snitch. 254 00:10:03,177 --> 00:10:05,512 - Was it Phil? - Yes. Damn it! 255 00:10:06,274 --> 00:10:07,640 What else did he tell you about me? 256 00:10:07,640 --> 00:10:09,183 Nothing. Why are you so upset about this? 257 00:10:09,360 --> 00:10:11,195 Because I asked you not to pry into my business 258 00:10:11,289 --> 00:10:13,103 and you did it anyway. 259 00:10:13,197 --> 00:10:14,511 I got to get back to work. 260 00:10:15,773 --> 00:10:18,515 I forgot that Kat has her anniversary dinner tonight, 261 00:10:18,536 --> 00:10:20,017 so I still need a place to crash. 262 00:10:20,037 --> 00:10:21,612 But you can kiss that lingerie goodbye. 263 00:10:21,633 --> 00:10:25,115 You're gonna get my baggiest sweatpants and tube socks. 264 00:10:25,136 --> 00:10:26,137 Joke's on you! 265 00:10:26,283 --> 00:10:28,671 Because I find the tube to be the sexiest of socks! 266 00:10:34,270 --> 00:10:35,866 So, what vibe are we going for? 267 00:10:36,199 --> 00:10:37,388 Sexy and sophisticated? 268 00:10:37,534 --> 00:10:38,963 Schoolgirl with an attitude? 269 00:10:39,109 --> 00:10:41,705 Or are we talking full-on dominatrix? 270 00:10:41,945 --> 00:10:45,542 I don't know. My underwear usually comes in a four-pack. 271 00:10:45,688 --> 00:10:48,118 Well, what do you think Oscar would like? 272 00:10:48,274 --> 00:10:50,120 No, we are not shopping for Oscar. 273 00:10:50,276 --> 00:10:51,287 We are shopping for you. 274 00:10:51,444 --> 00:10:53,050 What do you like? 275 00:10:53,196 --> 00:10:54,530 Um... 276 00:10:54,551 --> 00:10:55,865 This is cute. 277 00:10:55,959 --> 00:10:59,035 Okay, maybe we should shop for Oscar a little bit. 278 00:10:59,056 --> 00:11:00,536 Aren't you gonna try anything on? 279 00:11:00,557 --> 00:11:02,705 You know, for your sneaky link? 280 00:11:02,799 --> 00:11:06,803 Do not use the slang that I teach you against me. 281 00:11:06,959 --> 00:11:08,377 And he's not getting anything. 282 00:11:08,398 --> 00:11:10,140 He really irked my nerves today. 283 00:11:10,296 --> 00:11:11,307 What happened? 284 00:11:11,401 --> 00:11:12,736 He found out my middle name. 285 00:11:12,965 --> 00:11:15,145 That rat bastard. 286 00:11:15,238 --> 00:11:16,625 I just don't need him knowing 287 00:11:16,719 --> 00:11:18,293 every little detail about my life. 288 00:11:18,314 --> 00:11:19,649 Well, I like when people know 289 00:11:19,805 --> 00:11:21,244 every little detail about my life. 290 00:11:21,505 --> 00:11:23,226 I wish I could wear one of those medical bracelets, 291 00:11:23,246 --> 00:11:26,416 but, instead of allergies, it would have fun facts about Kat. 292 00:11:26,510 --> 00:11:28,158 I'd call them Kat Facts. 293 00:11:28,251 --> 00:11:30,170 Well, that's not how I operate. 294 00:11:30,326 --> 00:11:31,922 Knowledge is power, 295 00:11:32,068 --> 00:11:34,403 and I don't want anyone having power over me. 296 00:11:34,424 --> 00:11:35,853 I mean, first, it's my middle name. 297 00:11:35,999 --> 00:11:37,240 Then it's my blood type. 298 00:11:37,354 --> 00:11:39,909 Next thing you know, I'm swallowing a balloon of cocaine, 299 00:11:39,930 --> 00:11:42,839 being arrested at the border and thrown into a Turkish prison. 300 00:11:42,933 --> 00:11:46,697 You have got to stop listening to Locked Up Abroad before bed. 301 00:11:47,938 --> 00:11:50,607 And no one's gonna take your power from you. 302 00:11:50,753 --> 00:11:52,369 I mean, you've opened up to me, 303 00:11:52,588 --> 00:11:54,924 and I'm still terrified of you. 304 00:11:55,018 --> 00:11:56,874 Aw, you're sweet. 305 00:11:57,020 --> 00:11:58,542 And, for what it's worth, 306 00:11:58,688 --> 00:12:00,523 I think you can trust Carter. 307 00:12:00,617 --> 00:12:01,691 What? 308 00:12:01,785 --> 00:12:03,693 Carter? 309 00:12:03,787 --> 00:12:05,883 What makes you think it's Carter? 310 00:12:10,867 --> 00:12:12,629 Oh! Hey. 311 00:12:12,723 --> 00:12:15,371 Where'd you sneak off to last night? 312 00:12:15,392 --> 00:12:17,634 Uh, I was... with a guy. 313 00:12:17,728 --> 00:12:20,783 Ah. So that's where you've been going. 314 00:12:20,804 --> 00:12:22,066 What's his name? 315 00:12:22,212 --> 00:12:23,223 Peter... 316 00:12:23,452 --> 00:12:25,319 Backpack. 317 00:12:26,643 --> 00:12:28,739 That is a completely plausible name! 318 00:12:28,958 --> 00:12:31,481 And what does that have to even do with Carter? 319 00:12:31,575 --> 00:12:33,702 Oh, I got it. 320 00:12:36,559 --> 00:12:37,654 Here. You left your earrings. 321 00:12:37,748 --> 00:12:40,323 Thank you, Peter Backpack. Bye! 322 00:12:40,469 --> 00:12:43,399 Who the hell is Peter Backpack?! 323 00:12:43,451 --> 00:12:45,141 Okay, fine, it's Carter. 324 00:12:45,162 --> 00:12:47,247 I knew it! I wasn't 100% sure, 325 00:12:47,476 --> 00:12:49,312 but now I know it's Carter! 326 00:12:49,332 --> 00:12:50,500 He's a great guy. 327 00:12:50,646 --> 00:12:53,003 Well, yeah, I guess he's okay. 328 00:12:53,149 --> 00:12:55,933 But I'm still not sure if I should open up to him. 329 00:12:56,079 --> 00:12:58,602 I mean, I've done that before, and it gets kind of messy. 330 00:12:58,748 --> 00:13:00,437 If you keep worrying about things getting messy, 331 00:13:00,583 --> 00:13:03,180 you might miss out on things that are really great. 332 00:13:03,326 --> 00:13:06,266 I mean, does ice cream end up on my face, 333 00:13:06,422 --> 00:13:09,665 in my hair, down my cleavage every time I eat it? 334 00:13:09,686 --> 00:13:11,594 Yes. But is it worth it? 335 00:13:11,615 --> 00:13:13,023 You bet. 336 00:13:13,169 --> 00:13:15,171 Okay, I keep telling you... cup instead of cone. 337 00:13:15,192 --> 00:13:16,599 But... 338 00:13:16,693 --> 00:13:17,767 I hear you. 339 00:13:17,788 --> 00:13:18,789 Now, if you would, 340 00:13:18,789 --> 00:13:19,790 drumroll, please. 341 00:13:19,790 --> 00:13:21,917 Oh. 342 00:13:29,372 --> 00:13:32,209 Randi, I have never felt sexier. 343 00:13:32,355 --> 00:13:33,356 I... 344 00:13:33,449 --> 00:13:34,471 Whoa! Oh! 345 00:13:34,690 --> 00:13:36,296 Sorry, ma'am. Oh, geez. I'm good. 346 00:13:36,452 --> 00:13:38,142 Whoa! I can walk like a woman. 347 00:13:38,288 --> 00:13:39,893 Oh, hey! 348 00:13:41,457 --> 00:13:42,625 Mm-mm. 349 00:13:42,646 --> 00:13:44,690 I'm just gonna hold on to this. 350 00:13:47,818 --> 00:13:50,300 Okay. The table is set, 351 00:13:50,320 --> 00:13:51,801 the champagne is chilling 352 00:13:51,822 --> 00:13:54,137 and I hid everything with googly eyes 353 00:13:54,158 --> 00:13:57,546 so they wouldn't see me slip into this. 354 00:13:57,567 --> 00:13:58,902 Oh, girl. 355 00:13:59,048 --> 00:14:02,249 That's what Mama would call a one-way ticket to hell. 356 00:14:03,386 --> 00:14:05,315 I am so glad you're getting into this. 357 00:14:05,440 --> 00:14:08,672 I'm a big believer in celebrating every moment. 358 00:14:08,891 --> 00:14:10,559 A nice sunrise, 359 00:14:10,580 --> 00:14:12,249 a... a perfect pie crust, 360 00:14:12,395 --> 00:14:14,334 a healthy bowel movement. 361 00:14:14,490 --> 00:14:16,013 Totally. 362 00:14:16,253 --> 00:14:18,995 Don't act like you can't relate. 363 00:14:20,267 --> 00:14:22,008 Oh. It's Oscar. 364 00:14:22,165 --> 00:14:23,166 Hi! 365 00:14:23,260 --> 00:14:24,344 Hey, babe, guess what. 366 00:14:24,438 --> 00:14:25,960 Um, you found five dollars. 367 00:14:25,971 --> 00:14:28,014 You're in jail. Pluto's a planet again. 368 00:14:28,171 --> 00:14:29,849 I love that you actually guess. 369 00:14:30,006 --> 00:14:32,185 No, I'm at a basketball game in a luxury suite. 370 00:14:32,279 --> 00:14:33,614 My boss couldn't use his tickets, 371 00:14:33,843 --> 00:14:35,021 and Max really wanted to go. 372 00:14:35,178 --> 00:14:36,950 - Oh, Max is there? - Hey, Kat! 373 00:14:37,107 --> 00:14:40,860 Oscar is the man. I haven't seen so many free hot dogs in my life. 374 00:14:40,954 --> 00:14:43,019 So does this mean you'll be a little late? 375 00:14:43,780 --> 00:14:46,856 Actually, would it be okay if we pushed dinner to tomorrow? 376 00:14:46,877 --> 00:14:48,785 Oh. Um... 377 00:14:48,795 --> 00:14:50,943 Uh, y-yeah. 378 00:14:51,048 --> 00:14:52,539 Yeah. No big deal. 379 00:14:52,695 --> 00:14:53,873 But keep an eye on Max. 380 00:14:53,967 --> 00:14:56,511 He will eat free food till he pukes. 381 00:14:57,304 --> 00:14:58,680 He has had six hot dogs. 382 00:14:58,795 --> 00:15:00,766 Seven! 383 00:15:02,372 --> 00:15:03,560 Oh. 384 00:15:04,895 --> 00:15:06,146 Oscar's not coming. 385 00:15:06,376 --> 00:15:08,649 He's at a basketball game with Max. 386 00:15:08,878 --> 00:15:10,546 Oh, no, sweetie. 387 00:15:10,567 --> 00:15:12,819 No, don't worry about it. 388 00:15:12,976 --> 00:15:14,488 Don't need these anymore. But I'm fine. 389 00:15:14,644 --> 00:15:15,885 It's totally fine. It's fine. 390 00:15:15,906 --> 00:15:16,896 It's fine, it's fine, it's fine. 391 00:15:16,980 --> 00:15:18,325 - Don't need this anymore. - No, no! 392 00:15:18,554 --> 00:15:20,056 I know you're upset. 393 00:15:20,077 --> 00:15:22,829 But if you throw any more of my cooking in the trash, 394 00:15:22,986 --> 00:15:24,790 I'll cut you. 395 00:15:26,448 --> 00:15:28,356 I just feel silly about the whole thing. 396 00:15:28,512 --> 00:15:30,285 I wish I hadn't made such a big deal out of it. 397 00:15:30,431 --> 00:15:33,601 Well, I think you should have made a bigger deal out of it. 398 00:15:33,694 --> 00:15:35,842 A rooster who doesn't crow 399 00:15:35,936 --> 00:15:37,771 cannot be mad when folks don't wake up. 400 00:15:37,865 --> 00:15:41,348 Yeah, but what if the rooster's afraid to-to lose the only hen 401 00:15:41,369 --> 00:15:43,517 who's stayed with her for four months? 402 00:15:43,611 --> 00:15:45,540 Oh, honey. 403 00:15:45,696 --> 00:15:48,636 Have some faith in yourself. 404 00:15:48,782 --> 00:15:51,879 Oscar is lucky to have you. 405 00:15:52,025 --> 00:15:53,120 Thank you. 406 00:15:53,214 --> 00:15:55,028 Aw. 407 00:15:55,049 --> 00:15:58,532 Wait a minute. Why am I not looking at the top of your head? 408 00:15:58,626 --> 00:15:59,814 Mmm. 409 00:15:59,960 --> 00:16:02,723 I couldn't help myself. 410 00:16:02,817 --> 00:16:05,059 If you're going to hell, honey, 411 00:16:05,153 --> 00:16:06,561 I'm going with you. 412 00:16:06,654 --> 00:16:10,033 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. 413 00:16:16,560 --> 00:16:17,707 Hey. 414 00:16:18,823 --> 00:16:20,564 Hey. 415 00:16:20,585 --> 00:16:22,306 I didn't think I'd see you here. 416 00:16:23,067 --> 00:16:26,299 Well, Peter Backpack was busy, so... 417 00:16:27,738 --> 00:16:29,302 Sit down. I'll get us a drink. 418 00:16:31,502 --> 00:16:33,671 Listen... 419 00:16:33,765 --> 00:16:34,912 you were right. 420 00:16:34,933 --> 00:16:37,414 You laid out some very clear, 421 00:16:37,435 --> 00:16:38,655 very strict... 422 00:16:38,676 --> 00:16:41,940 some would say illogical... boundaries... 423 00:16:42,774 --> 00:16:45,016 ... and I did not respect them. 424 00:16:45,110 --> 00:16:47,351 That's on me, 425 00:16:47,508 --> 00:16:48,613 and I'm sorry. 426 00:16:48,759 --> 00:16:50,188 I appreciate that. 427 00:16:50,281 --> 00:16:53,576 I know that you were just trying to get to know me better. 428 00:16:54,265 --> 00:16:55,829 That's all I want. 429 00:16:56,861 --> 00:17:00,104 Then allow me to introduce myself. 430 00:17:00,198 --> 00:17:02,794 My name is Miranda Elizabeth Hamilton. 431 00:17:03,023 --> 00:17:04,796 Elizabeth was my nana's name. 432 00:17:05,025 --> 00:17:06,704 My favorite color is green. 433 00:17:06,798 --> 00:17:08,133 I've never seen Titanic. 434 00:17:08,279 --> 00:17:10,301 Ooh, and automatic toilets freak me out. 435 00:17:10,447 --> 00:17:12,470 I'll tell you when I'm done. 436 00:17:12,616 --> 00:17:14,472 Good to know. 437 00:17:14,702 --> 00:17:16,193 The Titanic thing is troubling, 438 00:17:16,214 --> 00:17:17,976 but my heart will go on. 439 00:17:18,810 --> 00:17:21,271 You'd get that if you'd seen it. 440 00:17:22,480 --> 00:17:25,150 And you asked about my fish tattoo. 441 00:17:25,296 --> 00:17:28,205 I got it to remind me that when things get tough 442 00:17:28,226 --> 00:17:30,228 to just keep swimming. 443 00:17:30,384 --> 00:17:31,896 Like in Finding Nemo. 444 00:17:31,990 --> 00:17:34,993 - Finding who? - Have you seen any movies? 445 00:17:35,889 --> 00:17:38,621 Please, keep going. 446 00:17:39,643 --> 00:17:42,167 Okay. Um... 447 00:17:43,314 --> 00:17:46,223 I don't usually talk about this, but... 448 00:17:46,317 --> 00:17:48,840 when I got my tattoo, I was... 449 00:17:48,986 --> 00:17:52,250 really struggling with depression. 450 00:17:52,406 --> 00:17:54,564 Oh, wow. 451 00:17:54,585 --> 00:17:56,055 I would've never guessed. 452 00:17:56,921 --> 00:17:59,100 Yeah, you get good at hiding it. 453 00:18:00,331 --> 00:18:02,072 Are things better now? 454 00:18:02,093 --> 00:18:04,022 Most days. 455 00:18:04,168 --> 00:18:05,836 I mean, I found a great therapist, 456 00:18:05,857 --> 00:18:07,411 the right meds, and... 457 00:18:07,431 --> 00:18:10,695 I finally feel like I have control over my life. 458 00:18:11,529 --> 00:18:13,323 But now... 459 00:18:14,428 --> 00:18:15,825 Now what? 460 00:18:16,941 --> 00:18:20,038 I'm scared that if I let someone new in 461 00:18:20,184 --> 00:18:21,946 I could lose that. 462 00:18:22,102 --> 00:18:24,042 Randi... 463 00:18:25,773 --> 00:18:29,005 ... we can take things as slow as you want. 464 00:18:29,943 --> 00:18:31,716 I'm not going anywhere. 465 00:18:34,448 --> 00:18:35,970 Thanks. 466 00:18:40,558 --> 00:18:42,133 So, uh, 467 00:18:42,289 --> 00:18:44,541 have you told your therapist about me? 468 00:18:44,635 --> 00:18:46,731 Oh, my goodness. 469 00:18:49,901 --> 00:18:52,883 Well, well, well, 470 00:18:52,904 --> 00:18:54,968 if it isn't Mr. Basketball. 471 00:18:54,989 --> 00:18:56,908 Liking the nickname, 472 00:18:57,137 --> 00:18:58,409 worried about the tone. 473 00:18:58,639 --> 00:19:00,557 Are you mad? 474 00:19:00,662 --> 00:19:02,747 I was. This helped. 475 00:19:02,903 --> 00:19:03,915 Phil helped. 476 00:19:04,071 --> 00:19:05,489 We actually had a lovely night. 477 00:19:05,583 --> 00:19:07,408 We ate dinner, we sang songs, 478 00:19:07,418 --> 00:19:08,586 we crowed like roosters. 479 00:19:08,816 --> 00:19:11,329 If you're hungry, there's popovers in the trash. 480 00:19:12,507 --> 00:19:15,989 S-Starting to think tonight was a bigger deal than you let on. 481 00:19:16,010 --> 00:19:18,492 Well, first it wasn't. Then it was. 482 00:19:18,513 --> 00:19:21,995 Well, maybe it always was and I just said it wasn't. 483 00:19:22,016 --> 00:19:24,269 I don't know. Cock-a-doodle-doo. 484 00:19:25,436 --> 00:19:27,261 Anyway... 485 00:19:27,272 --> 00:19:30,775 this is the longest relationship I've ever had, 486 00:19:30,931 --> 00:19:32,589 and I planned this big, 487 00:19:32,610 --> 00:19:35,686 fancy romantic dinner to celebrate it. 488 00:19:35,843 --> 00:19:36,844 But, instead, 489 00:19:36,844 --> 00:19:37,855 Phil tried on all my shoes 490 00:19:38,011 --> 00:19:40,013 and I ate three pieces of cake. 491 00:19:40,858 --> 00:19:43,183 Kat, you got to tell me when things are important. 492 00:19:43,277 --> 00:19:44,862 I was afraid of scaring you away. 493 00:19:44,956 --> 00:19:47,354 You know? I have a tendency to come on a little strong. 494 00:19:47,448 --> 00:19:49,283 Oh, you come on very strong. 495 00:19:49,377 --> 00:19:51,285 It's one of the things I like most about you. 496 00:19:51,296 --> 00:19:53,204 That and your laugh. 497 00:19:53,360 --> 00:19:55,883 And when you break into spontaneous tap dancing. 498 00:19:56,718 --> 00:19:58,219 Suck it, Ben. 499 00:19:58,959 --> 00:20:00,211 I'm sorry I wasn't here, 500 00:20:00,305 --> 00:20:02,713 and I promise not to miss our five-month anniversary. 501 00:20:03,474 --> 00:20:06,540 I'll save the lingerie I bought for then. 502 00:20:06,561 --> 00:20:08,135 Wait, there's lingerie? 503 00:20:08,229 --> 00:20:10,054 Real lingerie? Not just flannel? 504 00:20:10,210 --> 00:20:12,150 Yeah, it goes with the heels. 505 00:20:12,306 --> 00:20:15,215 I thought you said you couldn't walk in heels! 506 00:20:15,236 --> 00:20:17,739 Oh. I found a work-around. 507 00:20:20,481 --> 00:20:21,482 This is sexy, right? 508 00:20:25,215 --> 00:20:27,811 There you are! I have the whole day planned out. 509 00:20:27,988 --> 00:20:29,469 I'm gonna teach you how to fly this kite, 510 00:20:29,490 --> 00:20:31,398 we'll have a picnic, then we can ride our bikes 511 00:20:31,555 --> 00:20:32,566 to get snow cones. 512 00:20:32,722 --> 00:20:34,641 That sounds amazing! 513 00:20:34,745 --> 00:20:36,789 Rain check? 514 00:20:37,832 --> 00:20:39,823 Oh, my God. 515 00:20:39,865 --> 00:20:42,315 Guess who I just saw making out by the dumpsters. 516 00:20:42,336 --> 00:20:43,504 Uh, Lady and the Tramp. 517 00:20:43,660 --> 00:20:44,661 Two raccoons. 518 00:20:44,734 --> 00:20:45,746 George and Amal Clooney. 519 00:20:45,840 --> 00:20:47,675 They travel a lot. It's possible. 520 00:20:47,831 --> 00:20:50,240 I love that you always guess. 521 00:20:50,261 --> 00:20:51,585 Randi and Carter! 522 00:20:51,679 --> 00:20:53,243 - What?! - You're kidding! 523 00:20:53,264 --> 00:20:54,494 Those rascals! 524 00:20:54,588 --> 00:20:56,016 Why didn't anybody tell me? 525 00:20:56,173 --> 00:20:57,758 Because you can't keep a secret. 526 00:20:57,852 --> 00:20:59,103 Yes, I can. 527 00:21:00,677 --> 00:21:02,669 I got to call Sheila. 528 00:21:06,861 --> 00:21:08,341 ♪ Yo ♪ 529 00:21:08,362 --> 00:21:09,926 ♪ Let's go ♪ 530 00:21:10,020 --> 00:21:12,439 - ♪ Come on, listen up, baby ♪ - ♪ Ooh ♪ 531 00:21:12,596 --> 00:21:14,264 ♪ If you want to be free ♪ 532 00:21:14,285 --> 00:21:17,872 - ♪ If you want to be free ♪ - ♪ Got to let it go now ♪ 533 00:21:18,028 --> 00:21:19,874 ♪ Come on, let's take a ride with me ♪ 534 00:21:20,030 --> 00:21:21,865 - ♪ Take a ride with me ♪ - ♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪ 535 00:21:21,876 --> 00:21:24,274 ♪ I want to make you feel good ♪ 536 00:21:24,368 --> 00:21:25,942 ♪ Want you to lose your blues ♪ 537 00:21:25,963 --> 00:21:27,214 ♪ Want you to lose your blues... ♪ 37319